Cats incredible catfish tournament 2022

Tldr; the title is my question
So, I (34F) was diagnosed with PTSD last year, but have had it over 16 years. I was diagnosed because my PTSD was so strongly triggered that it caused a psychotic episode that lasted approximately 2 months. It was not my first psychotic episode nor my most intense psychotic episode, but it had been a while since I'd had one.
The psychiatrist that I spoke to did one session to look into what was causing my psychosis. I also had a preliminary appointment with a therapist to determine that I was psychotic. The psychiatrist decided that it was PTSD from a historic sexual assault (also diagnosed me with PTSD from an abusive relationship) and basically said "call me if it gets worse and we'll discuss medication or look into it further". I felt that the diagnosis was accurate as all of my psychotic episodes occured around these traumatic events. With the help of God and my husband I made it through my psychotic episode unmedicated and started to feel well again.
Ever since that episode (May-July 2022) I have started to pay extra attention to my mental health and am growing concerned. I think that I may have an underlying psychotic or mood disorder (possibly depressive type schizoaffective?). I have been tracking my moods and instances of unusual thought patterns and am considering bringing them up with my doctor. While my PTSD was triggered again recently, my unusual thoughts began a few weeks afterwards. Usually my psychosis happens at exactly the same time as my PTSD trigger.
Most recently I've had a few things happen that I am concerned about, but I'm not sure if it's really a pattern yet: - I was really depressed, but with no real reason to be depressed. That day I had this almost overwhelming fear that I was being kept in a government facility and being studied. Everyone was watching me and studying me and making notes for some kind of government experiment. I started to feel groggy and had to fight off thoughts that someone had drugged me. The events and feelings of the day started to take the shape of a dream I'd had as a teen and I fought off thoughts that I had predicted this scenario long ago. These thoughts and feelings lasted about 5 hours, until I went for a short walk on my 2nd break. - my cat comes into the bathroom every time that I go in there. Lately I've been paranoid that he has a camera on him and someone is using him to watch me undress for my shower - extreme mood swings. One day I was chatty and upbeat and even made a suggestion at work that was well received AND implemented. The next day I didn't want to get out of bed and wanted to go back to self harm and wanted to cry all day, but I forced myself to get up and go to work. These swings have been going on for a few months and are not tied to PMS. Usually they're on a daily basis, so one day I'll be great and the next day I'll be super depressed and they keep switching.
If you read this whole thing, thank you so much! Some of this is my way if processing information. I find it easier to make decisions and think things through if I type it out. I think for now I will keep taking notes on my mental health and seeing if it becomes a pattern or gets worse, but I also truly need to know: can PTSD turn into a mood disorder or psychotic disorder?

We've purchased an apartment where there's a bit of traffic/aircraft noise, so the balcony door is an incredibly heavy noise cancelling wonder. We've also got a cat who can be out there safely but for convenience we're wondering about installing a pet door so she can go in and out whenever she likes.
My question is: does anyone know how much adding a pet door to this kind of glass will affect its noise cancelling abilities? And bonus points if you can tell us how easily it could be replaced when we sell one day.

I apologize in advance for how long this is.
So basically both of my cats are spayed/neutered (one is female the other is male), I've had them both for 3-4 years now and at first they got along great. Somewhere along the lines my male cat, Tigger, became randomly aggressive mostly when he is being interacted with, not unprovoked. Tigger does not like to be pet very often, sometimes he comes up for love and then randomly becomes aggressive, other times he is okay with being pet and there is no outburst, and other times you cant touch or even look at him without it seeming like he is visibly upset/without him trying to swat/hiss/scratch the interacting individual away.
Now for my female cat, Beans. She is so incredibly sweet and affectionate to me and every other human she has every interacted with, so much so that I have 0 anxiety or doubt with her. She has NEVER been aggressive and the most she'll do is lightly kick me away if she doesn't want me to pet her.
My main issue is the relationship between the two cats. I have taken Tigger to multiple vets and had blood work done with him and every time they have just stated that it is an anxiety and/or temperament issue. I have him on anxiety meds and haven't seen too much of a difference in his behavior except the random hissing has gone down a bit.
The two really do not get along whatsoever, there are times where they are fine being around each other but honestly to me it seems like Tigger is constantly in a defensive state. Although in the beginning of their issues, Tigger was the main aggressor who would chase Beans and start fights, now it actually seems like its the other way around somehow?? Tigger is bigger than Beans by quite a bit, and he definitely has the upperhand when it comes to strength yet somehow, EVERY TIME Tigger tries coming in my room to hang out and chill, Beans ends up chasing him out like hes prey, its literally insane.
She seems pissed off whenever she sees someone giving him attention and is immediately focused on him and ready to prance any time he is even looking toward the room down the hallway.
I am not sure what to do to help them get along again and to help Tigger feel like he is safe :( I don't know if I am over dramatizing the way I am viewing them emotionally but I cant help but feel that this is unhealthy for them, and especially Tigger. They do not injure each other and never have, and their tiffs break up relatively quickly and without intervention, but I just feel bad that they alternate on going after each other. Any advice would be welcomed.

This might be a little different than other posts on here because I’m just 16. I want to break up with my boyfriend. I met him in early 2022, when I was 14 and he was 15, and within a few weeks of knowing eachother he confessed his love to me in a letter. I agreed to start dating him because I wanted to see where things went. I was so happy to be with someone who cared, but within the first few months of the relationship he dropped a lot of things that I should have broken up with him then and there for (detailed descriptions of how he was about to kill himself even though I was on the phone begging and crying for him not to, not letting me text anything that could identify him or link me to him, never having the money to do anything or buy anything). It was so stressful to be with him because he could only text me when his mom would let him borrow her phone, and I always worried about him. He made a detailed plan to kill my father but I still didn’t leave, partially because I was afraid he would kill me too. He is incredibly devoted to me but that isn’t enough to make me stay anymore. He scares off my friends with his offensive comments and even strangers judge me for being with him and say I deserve better. He comes over to my house nearly every day to “hang out” (sitting in a field and talking) because he has nothing to do, which was fine before it was every single day to the point where I couldn’t hang out with anyone else because even when I said no, he hung out at the gas station nearby because they have WiFi and his house doesn’t. All of this was not enough for me to be sick of it until around the beginning of this year when I began resenting him for us both becoming codependent on eachother and being the catalyst for me losing myself. I would hang out with him because we didn’t have anything to do but all I would do is cry. For 7 hours, at the mall or at the park, just cry right next to him because I hated him so much. I still couldn’t leave. Last month, I decided I needed to break up with him, and I went to do it but all I did was cry and say how much I loved him. I did ask to take a break later in the day but we ended up getting back together in the next few hours. I asked him to promise to stop doing some things if we were to stay together, like to stop making jokes about fucking other people right in front of me, and try to take pictures with me sometimes. He agreed to try but there wasn’t any progress at all. As I laid in bed that night I kicked myself for being a coward. We have been ok for a while but yesterday, when I took him downtown and I was being loud and spontaneous as I always want to be, he was awkward and quiet and said he didn’t want to be around the loud noises and people. He does this around my friends too and makes it so that I leave them to make him comfortable. I know he loves me. I know I love him. But if I want to be who I am, I need to part ways. I feel so guilty for doing this because he loves me and says I’m the only thing he is alive for and the whole reason he wants to make it in life. His future plans revolve around me. He said the only reason he improves and works out is to protect me, and the only reason he’d get a job is to take me on nice dates. I appreciate it deeper than anything else and I’ve never experienced anything like this. He lost his virginity to me because he wanted the person he lost it to to be his forever girlfriend. I can’t say I don’t wish we had a future together too. He’s responsible for giving me the strength I needed to become happy, and giving me the support I needed to get through hard times. I’m so scared. I hope it’ll all be ok. I’m going to miss him and all the memories we made together. I just want to make more where I’m free and not worried about him. Does anyone have advice? I’m planning on breaking up with him tomorrow. I hope I can give him back all of his stuff.

( I posted this on pro-revenge because of the hefty fine but was told to come here)
First I wanna say that this is not my story, it's my best friends & she gave me permission to share. (She's excited to read the comments lol)
So my friend (I'll call her Melissa, 22f) let an old high school pal (I'll call her Karen, 25f) move into her house about a year back. She brought along with her her big dog and two year old son. Melissa knew this would be a big change but Karen assured her they were both well behaved, and she needed a place to stay to get away from her baby daddy. (Who we later found out was actually a really sweet guy) Problems started almost immediately. The dog ruined Melissas couch & Karen did not respect my friends house. She left trash and food everywhere. Karen constantly invited her baby-dad to stay the night despite Melissa saying he was not allowed in her house. The dog & Karen tormented Melissas 1 year old cat to the point where the poor thing never came out anymore. Then to top it off, when Melissa told Karen she had to leave after about 5-6 months, Karen resorted to verbally abuse Melissa. Spreading horrible lies to people (and it's a small town), making fun of medical conditions Melissa has & saying incredibly inappropriate & insensitive things about her mother who struggles with alcoholism. There's more but let's get to the revenge part. Melissa went no contact after she kicked karen out. Fast forward about a month and she receives a call from Karen while she's at the JFS (Job and family services) office. She was asking if she could use Melissa's address for her insurance to "save a buck". My friend said absolutely not and that she doesn't appreciate being asked to commit insurance fraud then hung up. She stewed for a moment then called back. But she didn't call Karen, she called JFS to report her. Karen apparently used her address anyway & was trying to get out of a bunch of medical bills she had stacked up. She was hit with a 28k fine. How did my friend find this out? From Karen's baby daddy....they bonded over this & had started seeing each other. Oops! Anyway, I definitely am glad I'm on Melissas good side! (Jokes)

I am playing my first Final Fantasy game ever which is Final Fantasy VII from 1997. Here is the previous part for those who care: https://www.reddit.com/FinalFantasy/comments/13zpdz2/my_first_final_fantasy_game_ever_part_16/
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For this part, I completed the Forgotten City and the Raid of Midgar.
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For the gameplay, I finally found the Key of the Ancients which was under the Forgotten City Island using the submarine. It took me over an hour trying to find it. I regret not googling the answer because I would have saved more time. The only consolation I got was that I went back in the Gelnika Ship and found a second room that led to me find cool stuff. As for the boss fights, I thought they were really good. The fight against the Grey Weapon and the 3 boss fights in Midgard I thought they were good. While I realized that the boss fights against the Turks was optional, I still chose to fight them because it was fitting. After that, I was able to battle the Black Weapon and I got Ultima Weapon for Cloud which looks cool. Unfortunately it doesn't grant materia growth so I will use it later. And with the Blue, Grey, and Black Weapon defeated, there is only one weapon to defeat which is the Green Weapon. Scratch that, I have found the existence of the Red Weapon and I got a game over from it. I do not like the Red Weapon. While I may have yet to fight the Green Weapon, the Red Weapon has to be the hardest enemy in the game. The ability to remove your party members while at the same time having tentacles that take away your MP and HP is super strong. I will need more levels and legit strategy to beat the Red Weapon. I also discovered that the Black Weapon left a crater which allowed me to go to the Mountain Forest. I did not like the Mountain Forest because the leaf enemies are incredibly annoying. They dodge my attacks left and right I felt like I had to use magic but I had low ethers to replenish it. Those leaves can dodge some attacks from Omnislash so it is ridiculous. I found Typoon Summon but overall the Ancient Forest is something that I do not plan to come back to anytime soon.
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Now for story. So now we know the purpose of what Aerith did in the Forgotten City. She was trying to summon Holy using White Materia and the small plot twist was that White Materia has been with her the entire time as her hair pearl. I did not expect Aerith's hair pearl to be plot relevant later on. It turns out that the Holy summon has been activated but it has been suppressed by Sephiroth. So the plan is to defeat Sephiroth to stop the suppression of Holy. But before we can enter the Northern Crater, we have to intercept the Grey Weapon from attacking Midgard. It was epic to actually fight and defeat a Weapon cause they were something that I have typically avoided. After that I went to Midgard but I did not know that we are supposed to fly over it instead of walking to it. I walked into Sector 5 which I was able to do because I found the key in Bone Village and that lead me to the Premium Heart. I find it very funny that I was able to find what seems to be Tifa's strongest weapon because I was stuck in the return to the Forgotten City. After actually going on top of Midgard, it was epic to see how we have to enter the city via parachute with the gang. And of course, if I have to do a level in Midgard, I can only use the Midgard Trio of Cloud, Tifa, and Barrett. I often like it in games when they have a section of ending things where they began. This game began with us bombing one Shinra Reactor and now here we are finishing Shinra by coming to Midgard and stopping the Sister Ray. I also found it very satisfying to finally beat Heidegger and Scarlet in the Prod Clod together. Now for the Hojo boss fight. The boss fight was fine but the revelations are holy crap. It is confirmed that Hojo is the father of Sephiroth! I call BS on that. There is no way that Hojo could have smashed Lucrecia. I saw Vincent's flashback in the waterfall cave, I am still baffled. Of all the things to happen in the story from talking cats, a planet creating weapons, and crystals that can summon meteors, the most unrealistic thing about this game is that Dr. Hojo has the rizz to bag Lucrecia. I have said this in the previous part and I will say it again here. Whatever happened between Lucrecia and Vincent had to be something super major like Vincent had a hand in killing Lucrecia's parents or something of that gravity. It is just unbelievable that someone like Hojo could feel the touch of a woman. The only conclusion that I can see for Hojo and Lucrecia happening is that Hojo mind-controlled Lucrecia or that Lucrecia was so into science that she smashed Hojo out of science. Those can be the only explanation. I think I have spent enough time talking about this.
Moving on, we now have the get together in the Highwind. Seeing everyone having to prepare themselves for the final confrontation with Sephiroth is just emotional. Having everyone leave to do their own thing is just heartwarming. Barrett goes to Marlene, Red XIII visits his grandfather, Yuffie goes to Wutai to see her own father, Cid goes to Rocket Town to see Shera, and Vincent probably went to the Waterfall Cave to see Lucrecia. After that we have a one on one with Cloud and Tifa and just it is adorable and sad at the same time. Both Cloud and Tifa no longer have a place or anyone they can go to anymore so they stay on the Highwind but at least they have each other. I really enjoyed the one on one and then seeing Tifa sleep on Cloud's shoulder is just so cute. While the somber tone may be sad, the things said were just great. But after that everyone regroups together and now with a clear purpose in mind, AVALANCHE has one more mission to complete: Defeat Sephiroth.
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From the looks of it, I think that my next part, Part 18, will probably be my final part for this series. But before I enter the Northern Crater there are a few things I need to do. I need to find the manual for Tifa's Limit Break 4, the best weapon for Red XIII and Cid, and to beat the Red Weapon and maybe Green Weapon if I feel it.
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As always, please do not spoil what I have left for the game.

I did this upgrade in two stages. The first was a complete swap of the existing 6 speakers. I went with Infinity Reference all-around based on recommendations online. I got the required speaker harnesses to use the existing factory connection rather than splicing wires. Here are the speakers installed:
Front Dash: Infinity Reference REF-3032CFX 3-1/2 2-way - $45/pair renewed on Amazon
Front and Rear Doors: Infinity Reference 9633IX - 6" x 9" Three-way - $100/pair on Amazon
A couple of notes about these speakers. They’re extremely bright even when you run them on the 0db mode rather than +3db. There is a switch on the tweeter to change the mode. I first installed the dash and ran it for a couple days waiting for the door speakers to arrive. Just the dash swap made the sound so much better. However, once I installed the front doors I knew instantly it was tweeter overkill. I’ll probably end up swapping the front doors for a 6x9 component driver and let the dash handle the highs. I’ll leave the 3-ways in the rear so passengers get the full range back there.
Second note is that while they sound great and you can hear them hitting some low notes, they’re not loud below the mid-range. Now that my highs were shining I needed to fill in the lows. I settled on a Skar Audio setup to keep my budget in check. I’m not looking to win car audio competitions, just fill out the low end. Here is what I ended up with:
Skar 2019-2022 Ram 1500 (5th Gen) Crew Cab Compatible Single 12" Ported Subwoofer Enclosure - $140
Skar Audio VD-12 D4 12" 800W Max Power Dual 4 Ohm Shallow Mount Car Subwoofer - $100
Skar Audio RP-800.1D Monoblock Class D MOSFET Amplifier 800W - $130
Skar Audio 4 Gauge CCA Complete Amplifier Installation Wiring Kit, SKAR4ANL-CCA - $30
So I’m $645 into this upgrade for a complete speaker overhaul and added 12” subwoofer. I think that’s pretty good for the incredible difference in sound. The box is a perfect fit under the passenger rear seat. My only gripe is the ugly white stitching of the Skar logo on the box. I used a black Sharpie to fill it in the best I could. It’s still visible if you look, but it doesn’t draw attention to itself anymore.
I’ll probably get the bug to add a 4 channel amp for the Infinitys, but it will be really easy since I installed the ANC bypass module under the driver’s seat. The module bypasses the truck’s active noise cancellation while also providing a tap point for the input and output of all of the speakers.
A few tips:

1. Get a LOC (Line Out Converter) that also generates a remote wire signal. I first bought the PAC LOC 3.2 and I would have had to tap into the fuse box for an accessory remote wire. I returned it for 7.2.
2. The firewall has a rubber grommet with an extra port for a wire. I had to cut the nipple off the port on the engine side and still had a hell of a time pulling 4 gauge wire through with a coat hanger. Running the power wire was the hardest part of the entire install.
3. The fuse box lid in the engine next to the battery is a great place to screw down the amp fuse. I also used split loom for the power wire in the engine bay and it looks clean and professional.
4. I used Posi-tap connectors for the speaker connections between the LOC and the ANC bypass harness. I got everything connected and didn’t hear any sound so double-checked these and sure enough, had to redo them. I may have used too large a size because the pin that punctures the wire kept going to the side of the wire. I had to manually puncture the wire with the pin before screwing the Posi-tap down.

Hope all of this helps somebody else. The system absolutely slams now!

( I posted this on pro-revenge & got removed for “not being feasible” but I assure you my rockstar friend lived this)
First I wanna say that this is not my story, it's my best friends & she gave me permission to share. (She's excited to read the comments lol)
So my friend (I'll call her Melissa, 22f) let an old high school pal (I'll call her Karen, 25f) move into her house about a year back. She brought along with her her big dog and two year old son. Melissa knew this would be a big change but Karen assured her they were both well behaved, and she needed a place to stay to get away from her baby daddy. Problems started almost immediately. The dog ruined Melissas couch & Karen did not respect my friends house. She left trash and food everywhere. Karen constantly invited her baby-dad to stay the night despite Melissa saying he was not allowed in her house. The dog & Karen tormented Melissas 1 year old cat to the point where the poor thing never came out anymore. Then to top it off, when Melissa told Karen she had to leave after about 5-6 months, Karen resorted to verbally abuse Melissa. Spreading horrible lies to people (and it's a small town), making fun of medical conditions Melissa has & saying incredibly inappropriate & insensitive things about her mother who struggles with alcoholism. There's more but let's get to the revenge part. Melissa went no contact after she kicked karen out. Fast forward about a month and she receives a call from Karen while she's at the JFS (Job and family services) office. She was asking if she could use Melissa's address for her insurance to "save a buck". My friend said absolutely not and that she doesn't appreciate being asked to commit insurance fraud then hung up. She stewed for a moment then called back. But she didn't call Karen, she called JFS to report her. Karen apparently used her address anyway & was trying to get out of a bunch of medical bills she had stacked up. She was hit with a 28k fine for the fraud. How did my friend find this out? From Karen's baby daddy....while they hooked up. Oops! Anyway, I definitely am glad I'm on Melissa’s good side!

Wife (F) and I (M) have been open to adding a close 3rd to our social life and sex life. Really looking for a close friend primarily, sexual attraction is desired but actual sex is very reliant on a connection. Pretty much looking for a replacement to a friend we had pre-covid that was just flirting and laughing and hanging out 24-7 with minimal physical contact. Well the friend moved away and my wife figures out she had a major crush on her the whole time and is now very sad going into covid. We have since worked through her feelings on that matter and are now looking for a 3rd to fill the close friendship void and then some, and that may as well be a 🦄 of 🦄
We’re both on our own accounts, partnered, in a large liberal city. Both Majestic, using pings primarily. Mid 20s with real and unique pictures, and we aren’t unattractive people. Group chats with candid unedited selfies. Really trying to prove we are real.
So far we’ve gotten some matches but most are fizzling out. We’ve made two pretty good connections but one is incredibly sketchy on the catfish radar. Rough call to be honest, I have loads of experience with navigating internet anonymity and actually getting catfished (and attempting to not get catfished) and this one has us both stumped. Could be a really shy person or a fake person. Recently we made another match and the person deactivated their account (or got banned) after a few hours of group chatting.
Are we doing this wrong? We’re both new to this type of thing and looking for something insanely specific, and we understand that finding the right person that will also be fulfilled and happy with the situation we want is going to be like finding a needle in a haystack. I know that the unique person we are looking for exists, it’s almost happened organically twice already. I’m not sure where to be looking or what we should be saying in our bio. I understand I’m the “hindrance” to this situation being a male, how can I hint that we actually want a connection and we aren’t looking to just sexualize the person? My wife and I are essentially a combo person at this point and we are with each other 24-7. Covid really hammered down this relationship dynamic that we already had and its not going anywhere
We are genuinely confused as to the situations we are finding ourselves in and are looking for insight and guidance. How are the people we are looking for and talking to feeling? How can we make them feel good and fulfilled? How should we approach these situations and digest our feelings on them?We have read a lot of posts on this sub and am hoping for you kind souls to help us out.

Log 1. September 3rd, 1940. Me and my colleague have found a haunted mansion in the deep woods! This will be our base of operations from now on. While yes, the world situation now is... dreadful, I'm sure it wouldn't reach Unova. Me and old Kent Juniper have nothing to worry about! Log 2. September 5th, 1940. There are a lot of interesting pokemon in this mansion! Some sort of candle fellows. We decided to name them Litwicks. We have set up our equipment in the main hall. I am looking forward to whatever will come next! Log 3. September 8th, 1940. It appears we have discovered Litwick's evolution, and named it Lampent! I am feeling a little dizzy lately, but I'm pretty sure it's just lack of sunlight. I've been in this mansion for a week straight now, haha! Log 4. September 13th. 1940 Sunlight didn't help, I feel I may have gotten sick with a cold or something. I have forgotten about this diary completely, but my Lampent keeps me company. I feel drowzy around it... I'll go to sleep. Log 5. September 15th. 1940 I don't feel any better phyically, in fact I feel worse, but we have discovered the final evolution in the Lampent line! When exposed to a dusk stone, Lampent evolves into Chandelure! It was an appropriately spooky name for a ghost and fire type pokemon. Log 6. September 16th. 1940 Unovan men are being drafted into the war. I am writing this as me and Kent are on our way to the enlistment facility. I feel sick, but I need to serve my country... at least my Chandelure... keeps me company. Log 7. October 12th. 1940 This is terrible... I forgot what it means to know peace. This wretched month is the worst of my life. I feel incredibly ill, and can barely fight, but I hope I am not a nuisance. At least my Chandelure is right here with me. Log 8. October 30th. 1940. Kent... is no longer with us. I sent a letter on his behalf to his wife and children. I have been relegated to the infirmary due to my illness; however, I fear I may not last much longer. At least I have Chandelure to keep me compa (The writing abruptly ends.) Log... 9? October 30th, 2022. I don't know where I am, but I woke up... I'm not sure what I am? Some sort of... Chandelier. A pokemon?... why do I know that term?... I'll be heading wherever now. Who did this journal even belong to?... May forget to update this. Log 10, February 1st, 2023. Just as I said. I forgot. I found this old mansion in the woods, dunno why I decided to go here... feels right, I guess. I'll settle down here, I suppose. Log 11. May 4th, 2023. I met this Gengar guy, he seems pretty nice... I dunno, I get some sorta feeling when he laughs. When he talks. When he shares his evil plans with me. When he tells me about how he beat up a bunch of pokemon. Hm. Log 12. May 17th. 2023. Gengar asked me to be his boyfriend?! I suppose love is what I've been feeling these days, so I of course accepted. It's... nice. I like him. He's... comforting, which is unlike the stories he tells me about the other pokemon. Maybe he's just like this... with me? Log 13. May 30th. 2023 Me and Gengar moved to his region since Unova got destroyed. It's been difficult these past months. I'm figuring out who I am, who I was, I'm figuring out my feelings... But at least Gengar keeps me company.

Hi again.
Due to the majority has voted against going for blackout. We have decided that we should honor that decision, and we want to respect that.
We will not be participating in the blackout.
As we would be missing out on large news on the June 11th and with the upcoming demo.
As we still will not be with the blackout, we still believe it is a good cause, so we want you to tell you more about it, and how you can support it.

What is this about?

Reddit has recently announced an update regarding their API access those changes include incredibly high prices for Third Party Mobile Applications, and example of Apollo app revealing for them to keep existing, they would have to pay $20 million USD/year to operate. And restricting NSFW and mature content only trough their official site.
These changes will be applied on July 1st, and will make all 3rd Party Applications completely unusable.
You can read more about the situation here:
Don't Let Reddit Kill 3rd Party Apps!
An open letter on the state of affairs regarding the API pricing and third party apps and how that will impact moderators and communities.

What's the plan?

On June 12th, many subreddits will be going dark to protest this policy. Some will return after 48 hours: others will go away permanently unless the issue is adequately addressed.
What can you do?

1. Complain. Message the mods of reddit.com, who are the admins of the site: message reddit: submit a support request: comment in relevant threads on reddit, such as this one, leave a negative review on their official iOS or Android app- and sign your username in support to this post.
2. Spread the word. Rabble-rouse on related subreddits. Meme it up, make it spicy. Bitch about it to your cat. Suggest anyone you know who moderates a subreddit join at ModCoord.
3. Boycott and spread the word...to Reddit's competition! Stay off Reddit entirely on June 12th through the 13th- instead, take to your favorite non-Reddit platform of choice and make some noise in support!
4. Don't be a jerk. As upsetting this may be, threats, profanity and vandalism will be worse than useless in getting people on our side. Please make every effort to be as restrained, polite, reasonable and law-abiding as possible.

Thank you.
The FFXVI Mod Team.

Is it harder to get out of lower ranks in OW2 than OW1?
Short Story: I was Diamond ranked player in OW1 but find matchmaking to be so inconsistent that I can't get out of Silver in OW2.
Long Story (rant version):
It took me about 3.5 seasons to rank into Diamond in OW1. Getting out of Bronze/SilveGold was easy-ish. Most of that time was spent in Platinum, I just couldn't break through until season S32 but then I remained there through the end of S33 before I was shipped overseas (May 2022) and stopped playing.
I started playing again in mid-March of this year, unfortunately I had to create a new Xbox account, but so much had changed w/ OW2 that I stayed in QP the remainder of S3 to relearn how to play Orissa and better understand the new heros.
S4: I returned to competitive, but I'm struggling to get out of Silver. Match making has never been amazing, but now I frequently find myself on teams that are just terrible, while the other teams seem to be amazing. My win rate is about 45% and I can assure you, the great majority of those losses are not close. I've never been rolled so many times in OW, ever.
It's incredibly rare to get paired with support heros that actually take healing/support seriously. They might as well just make Moira a DPS hero based on the way I see her played most of the time.
So. Many. Fucking. Torborns. Bro, we're on offense, your turrets keep getting destroyed immediately, your placement is poorly concieved, learn to play another DPS hero.
It was not nearly this hard to rank out of Silver in OW1. I accept that I'm probably not the player I was a year ago, but I also didn't entirely forget how to play. I'm still the top player on my team in every match. I can't carry these teams, so that's probably on me, but I don't recall having to carry so many teams when I was moving out of the lower ranks of OW1.
Is it harder to rank out the lower ranks in OW2 than it was in OW1? If so, why?

So I just got a kitten (Bento) from someone who had an accidental litter. I’ve had cats in my childhood but I’ve never had my own cat that I was fully responsible for before. This kitten is incredible. He’s so sweet and playful. Incredibly well behaved and litter trained already. If he’s not running around doing kitten things, he’s hanging out near or on me and purring. He’s seems like he’s fairly bonded to me already even though I only got him on Friday. That being said, he meows quite a bit. He’ll just walk around and meow randomly. Short, little ones. Is that normal? Sometimes he does it for attention but other times it seems like it’s for nothing. I don’t mind him being more vocal but I do live in a studio apartment complex and try my best to be considerate of my neighbors.
I also have pet rats so when I’m not home or when I need to do something when I can’t fully pay attention to Bento, I put him in my bathroom. That’s where I put him the day I first got him and we hung out in there for a while. His litter box is in there, food, water, and toys that he enjoys playing with. He cries almost nonstop if I’m still in the apartment when I put him in there. Is he okay to do that? Am I supposed to just ignore him? He’s not terribly loud because he’s still small but I worry about annoying my neighbors. Also I don’t want to cause him undue stress but it’s impossible to kitten proof my studio because it’s my whole living space.

Hey everyone,
Long post sorry in advance but I need help!
I’ve never posted, though I read through these forums like crazy hoping to find a similar situation to mine. I’m a 27F, just diagnosed with Hashi about a year ago, May 2022.
The whole reason I found out I even had Hashimoto’s is because of a rash I developed. At first, I kind of thought it was ringworm because of the shape. I plan to post photos. But went to the dermatologist for them to prescribe me antifungal creams, then, when that didn’t work they did a biopsy. The results were basically “atopic dermatitis, contact dermatitis, eczema” AKA they didn’t know. They tried to give me steroids which I used for a bit and they kind of helped but I didn’t want to keep using them because I know they can make eczema worse with long term use. The derm recommended I make changes in products like soaps, detergents, etc to see if I’m allergic to something. I tried that and changed everything I’ve used to more natural, fragrance free, everything like that. Nothing helped. Then I decided, let me go to an allergist and see if maybe they can tell me that I’m allergic to something. Went to an allergist and got tested. Turns out I’m allergic to dust mites, cedar, cats, and dogs. I already knew I had hay fever certain times of year as well. I’ve also grown-up around cats and dogs my entire life. And I didn’t develop this rash until I was about 20-21. I do have a cat but the allergist didn’t seem to think that would be the cause considering I’ve had cats in my house since I was 5. So kind of another dead end. A couple months later I went to get a regular physical and my primary did some blood work and said she noticed my TSH seemed a low which it was. 0.03 TSH. Lucky for me she sent in for thyroid panel without me having to go to multiple doctors. On the second blood draw I had TSH 0.08, T4 free 1.2, T3 free 3.0, no thyroglobulin antibodies, and then TPO at 603. She recommended me to an Endo who tested the same markers again and this time TSH was 12.48, T3 free was 3.5, T4 free was 1.2. TPO was not tested despite my asking. This was all in May 2022, and the Endo confirmed to me I have Hashimoto’s.
Since then, my levels have fluctuated. I’ve gone from 0.025mcg to 0.100mcg on levothyroxine. The lowest my TPO ever was was 203. And my last testing was TPO 410.
All this to say, I can’t help but think that this rash that I have is connected with my Hashimoto’s. I’ve seen that some people have had issues with eczema or psoriasis with hashimotos as well but it could also be unrelated. I do feel like it flares worse, and sometimes gets better. Of course correlation =/= causation. But for the most part, it never fully goes away. This symptom is not one of my biggest concerns with Hashimoto’s as I have many other symptoms but I just have to wonder.
I have used different moisturizers, vaseline, gone gluten-free, taken different vitamins like vitamin D, selenium, magnesium. Not much seems to help that I can tell anyway.
The eczema/rash is exclusively on my shins(front side), forearms (back side), a strip along my tail bone, and more recently the backs of my knees just developed this week.
Does anyone has a similar situation? Has anyone found relief?

I got back yesterday and won't see my boyfriend for another month. I love him, he's wonderful and I don't want anyone else but I'm finding myself wondering if I need to either find someone local or just be alone. I spend about half the year where he is by choice, I work remote and it's incredible to be with him during that time. The other half I had agreed I would try and visit once a month for about a week but what's ended up happening is I'm spending about 2-3 weeks there and a month at home, rinse and repeat. I own a farm and manage/work it by almost entirely by myself and I have cats. The cats can come with me and the farm is largely dormant over the winter but in the summer I really need to be here. The logistics for getting to the airport and flying to him give me a full day of travel time each way because both locations are rural and 2-5 hours from an airport. My neighbors look after my cats, and while they are awesome, this is a we all help each other out kind of community and I don't feel like I'm pulling my weight. I also need to pay for lawn upkeep in my absence and I still end up worried about my cats while I'm gone. It's a hobby farm dependent on my labor to work, this doesn't work and becomes even more of a money pit if I can't do things myself. I want to have children and this makes me feel like I'm being a bad cat mom by being gone so much. Parking and logistics of getting to the airport are stressfull and expensive as I'm 4-5 hours away from an airport that has direct flights to him. I also worry that he'll worry that I'm not going to be a good mom and make him not want to have kids with me when it comes down to it. Travelling back and forth more than a couple times a year would be too stressful for the cats so I don't want to put them through that. When I got home I had this overwhelming sense of finally being back where I'm supposed to be. He and I used to talk about him getting a remote job and coming here to work the farm with me, he is actively looking for a full time remote job but the daydreaming about coming here has all but stopped. I feel like I'm being irresponsible going out there all the time and just having an amazing time while my cats and farm responsibilities are somewhat neglected. It doesn't seem sustainable for me to keep going on like this. Already my next trip has expanded from one week to 3 because we made plans. We have discussed him visiting me but decided we would rather he use his PTO days on trips that don't require 2 days of just travel. It's just a lot. I make enough that I shouldn't have to worry about money but lately I'm finding that I have to now. He was extremely reluctant to try for a long distance relationship because of all this and that the travelling would be on me. I don't want to break up with him but he was right and now it's not feeling as worth it. Both because I'm less secure in our relationship because of his hesitation and because it's a strain on me. Maybe I need to just let this love go.

Hello, I have finally gotten 32 colors submitted by people, myself included :)
Thanks to all those that have submitted a color:
1nsan1ty-1n-Pr0gr3ss, Asleep_Pen_2800. Awsome_N3rd, bargainbinelbow, CandySunset27, CatsAreYe, Christmas_Missionary, ClockButTakeOutTheL, colby6666, coldroom234, DBL_NDRSCR, Desperate_Advice_652, gabrielminoru, IIDSIIScorpion, Jacker1706, KingAdamXVII, lazygenius999, Loser872, MZ_swaggo, Moostcho, NotASixStarWaifu, OveroraptorBoi, Overused_Toothbrush, RaniTheUnique, Shite_Eating_Squirel, simplysimplec, Slalop, sovLegend, TheGodOfOnions, TreeFromBfb, violet-quartz, and Win090949
You can view the colors here
These are the colors:
User submitted:

1. Clickbait Green - #10e310 (u/ClockButTakeOutTheL)
   
2. Razzmatazz - #ea1962 (u/sovLegend)
   
3. Light Blue - #17aeea (u/TheGodOfOnions)
   
4. Little Girl Pink - #f8b9d4 (u/NotASixStarWaifu)
   
5. Black Forest - #004e1a (u/DBL_NDRSCR)
   
6. Tint of Love - #fe0576 (u/RaniTheUnique)
   
7. Eye Burn - #5600ff (u/IIDSIIScorpion)
   
8. Estrogen Pink - #f5a9b8 (u/MZ_swaggo)
   
9. Dark Cyan - #008b8b (u/Jacker1706)
   
10. Macaroni and Cheese - #f0ba26 (u/OveroraptorBoi)
    
11. Not Violet - #3060c4 (u/CatsAreYe)
    
12. Light Cyan - #a7eaec (u/Desperate_Advice_652)
    
13. Missionary Green - #2eb046 (u/Christmas_Missionary)
    
14. Night Sky - #070b36 (u/colby6666)
    
15. Schmeagol, the Unworthy - #72ded5 (u/Overused_Toothbrush)
    
16. Aquaneon - #00ffbb (u/Asleep_Pen_2800)
    
17. Brown Smoke - #ccb0b5 (u/Moostcho)
    
18. Offputting Brown - #493a18 (u/lazygenius999)
    
19. Peachpuff - #ffdab9 (u/coldroom234)
    
20. Otherworld Wine - #4b3657 (u/violet-quartz)
    
21. Jimothy, his Orangeness - #dd571c (u/Shite_Eating_Squirel)
    
22. The Seventeenth - #0a3a4a (u/bargainbinelbow)
    
23. Night Fire - #ec4410 (u/KingAdamXVII)
    
24. Sunshine Orange - #f48037 (u/Slalop)
    
25. Essence of Awesomeness - #4976bf (u/Awsome_N3rd)
    
26. Haha Funny - #b00b69 (u/Loser872)
    
27. Toothpaste - #07faf2 (u/TreeFromBfb)
    
28. Blorb - #8672ef (u/gabrielminoru)
    
29. Bright Aquamarine - #0be9b6 (u/CandySunset27)
    
30. Phrenophobia - #05204a (u/1nsan1ty-1n-Pr0gr3ss)
    
31. Platinum - #e5e4e2 (u/simplysimplec)
    
32. Komorebi Green - #30893b (u/Win090949)
    

Colors added by me:

1. Mardi Gras - #880085
   
2. Pineapple - #e6ae25
   
3. Carmine - #960018
   
4. Volt - #ceff00
   
5. Coffee - #6f4e37
   
6. Stop Red - #cf142b
   
7. Safety Yellow - #eed202
   
8. Clover - #3ea055
   
9. Absolute Zero - #0048ba
   
10. Buff - #daa06d
    
11. Fossil - #cac2b7
    
12. Imperial Purple - #66023c
    
13. Watermelon - #fc6c85
    
14. Atomic Tangerine - #ff9966
    
15. Carrot - #ed9121
    
16. Aureolin - #fdee00
    
17. Radioactive Green - #2cfa1f
    
18. French Violet - #8806e
    
19. Caramel - #85461e
    
20. Razzle Dazzle Rose - #ff33cc
    
21. Laser Lemon - #ffff66
    
22. Pistachio - #93c572
    
23. Zaffre - #0014a8
    
24. Pearl - #eae0c8
    
25. Titanium - #878681
    
26. Dark Chocolate - #490206
    
27. Sponge - #fdfe03
    
28. Skobeloff - #007474
    
29. Onyx - #353839
    
30. Vodka - #bfc0ee
    
31. Robin Egg Blue - #00cccc
    
32. Shampoo - #ffcff1
    

I haven’t completely figured out the tournament arrangements, but I do have a few things figured out
Round 1 Matches will all be a user’s color vs a color I added, meaning Round 2 and beyond will consist of either 2 colors added by me, 1 color added by me and 1 user submitted, or 2 user submitted (I personally find the last of those 3 to be the most interesting)
Whenever a users color is competing, I’ll ping them in the comments (if you really REALLY don’t wanna be pinged for whatever reason just let me know and I won’t ping you)
I’m also changing where the colors can be viewed. RIP comment colors, I’ll now include the colors in the posts, and in addition I’ll include a “progress bar” of sorts of the color that have made it through
There’s a few more things in relation to the winners but I’ll address that in my next post
^{one last small thing: I realize now that “Google Boysenberry” was never meant to be added due to having an invalid hex code submitted by the user, but I accidentally included it in visualizations. Sorry u/Less-icream-4504}

Welcome to Camp Redwood! The feel-good camp for ALL AGES.
We toast marshmallows around the fire, tell spooky ghost stories, and hide in random secret military bunkers under the campgrounds! Because SOMETHING IS HERE WITH US.
Camp Redwood is the PERFECT PLACE for a summer getaway where we start EVERY DAY with a CAMP REDWOOD SMILE. Where our counselors disappear every five minutes, and our campers disembowel us for funsies! Did I forget to mention our littles aren’t actually eight years old, but fully grown adults?
We hope you enjoy your fucking stay!
We are also not responsible for any counselors revealing they are not who they said they are—and not who they appear to be.
...
So. There’s a LOT to tell you and not a lot of time to tell it.
Right now, I suppose you could say we are under lockdown—if that is the word. I want to go over the last several days to get you up to date. That’s all I can do right now. I can hope and pray the thing with Teddy’s voice does not get in here, and once again cry out for help—that I know is not coming. Not from the authorities, at least. But hey, if any of you fancy coming to rescue us, we’re in the middle of the Canadian wilderness. The closest rest-stop is maybe three fucking hours away. So have fun. Has it really almost been a week since I posted? Well, we’re still here!
And surprise, surprise, help is not coming. So, please excuse the salt. I am seventeen years old and I have been abandoned by the adults who were supposed to be looking after us.
Who were supposed to act under protocol if something like this happened. I know they were waiting for it—there are specific fucking guidelines on an emergency evacuation for counselors if this ever happened. But then the little shits took over before we could do anything. I guess I’ll start by letting you know that there are two of us left. (three, if we count Rowan, but I’m not). What I thought was going to be a quiet summer getaway with kids my age has turned into a nightmare.
For one, we have been cornered inside the head counselor’s underground secret bunker. If you want to know why she has a secret military bunker, I guess you should keep reading.
Because shit gets weirder than animal crackers having the power to turn adults into kids, and vice versa. When I made my first post, I thought that was it for us. I thought for sure there must have been a self-destruct somewhere—which meant whoever was running this camp was waiting for something like this. I was sure we were going to die, so after making the post, I have to admit with ya’ll—I just slept. I curled up, tried to ignore Harry and Carmel calling our names through childish laugher, and went to sleep with the thought in my head that I was completely at peace with what I had done with my life.
Sure, I was young. Seventeen years old is too young to be ripped apart by littles who are in fact grown adults. But as I was falling into slumber and allowing myself to fall, with my head resting in my lap, my head turned towards a separate pile of files on the other side of the room—I realized I really wanted to know how this was possible. There was so much I needed to know. Why did eight-year-old Eleanor Summers have a file where here birthday dated back to 1979? Why had supposedly innocent sugary snacks turned our adorable littles into mini psychopaths?
These kids were not kids, somehow. But how? How was that even possible? Could it be that the files were wrong?
1979 was definitely 45.
But Eleanor Summers couldn’t be 45 years old. I knew what 45 looked like. I knew that they thought like. They spent half of their time on Facebook laughing at outdated memes, and the other half… I don’t know, working? They have job’s! They’re happily married with kids, maybe soon grandkids! That was not Eleanor Summers. Because Eleanor Summers was most definitely eight years old. I had played several rounds of teddy-bears picnic, and spent hours reassuring her that Harry's ghost stories were in fact not real, enough times for me to know that this little kid was little—and a kid.
But something was bothering me. More than the secret military bunker, and magic age-regressing animal crackers. When I first signed up to Camp Redwood, one of the tag-lines to gain attraction had been, “Solve mysteries in the woods in the dead of night, with nothing but a flashlight and your fellow campers!” I had no idea I would be solving this thing on my own, trapped inside a bunker.
“What are you doing?” Rowan, who was still looking through Allison’s dinosaur laptop, turned to me with half lidded eyes, when I slowly got to my feet, careful not to make too much noise, and crept over to the pile of separate files which seemed to be crumbling apart from age. He kept his voice low, but it sounded almost like a whine. He could have been scared, but from the way he was sitting, cross-legged with a frowny face, I figured something must have been going on with him. The guy looked tired. More tired than normal.
The bags under his eyes were practically shadowing his face, and were an odd contrast to unusually ashy colored cheeks and slightly dilated eyes. Still though, Rowan refused to look vulnerable. I caught glimpse of Harry’s raybans sitting on his head, pinning back thick dark brown curls from falling in front of sleepy eyes. Maybe he was finally losing his cool and breaking out of the well-constructed façade he had been hiding behind since Teddy disappeared.
We had just narrowly escaped a crowd of psycho littles high on age-regressing sugary snacks who were doing who-the-fuck knows to the other counselors who had been captured, so I didn’t blame him looking like that. I guess he couldn’t look me in the eye, because in Rowan’s mind, he was the reason why this happened. He was the leader, and the camp had fallen to psychopathic little eight year olds who had taken half of the counselors hostage, and the other half—most likely taken apart in the physical sense, after what we had witnessed in Cassie’s cabin. Still though, it wasn’t Rowan’s fault. He could sit there and pull a face all he wanted, it’s not like I was going to blow up at him for getting us stuck down here. He actually saved us.
And trapped us, judging from the footsteps upstairs, Carmel and Harry still bouncing around looking for us.
It was a game in their heads. The little’s thought it was cat and mouse. Harry and Carmel were the oblivious cats prowling, while we were the mice, hoping to fucking GOD we weren’t caught and eaten. Ignoring Rowan, I glimpsed what looked like a box full of DVD’S—all of which were labelled with dates and names. I saw familiar ones, my heart racing into my throat. Phoebe. Eli. Cassandra.
Each DVD had one of the kid’s names scribbled on the front, as well as a date.
I found Eleanor’s right at the back of the box.
Eleanor Summers.
08/05/2021. (PM)
Before I could hesitate and think what I was doing, I slid the DVD into the portable player attached to the MacBook. Rowan, to my surprise, didn’t move. But he did make an acknowledging noise when the screen flickered to what looked like video footage. Peering at the screen, I found myself staring at a small white room. There was no door. Only a wooden desk and a chair, and sitting on it was a middle aged woman with dark blonde curls tied into a strict ponytail. She was wearing what looked like a prison jumpsuit.
Her eyes were eerily glued to the camera, unblinking. Her wrists were cuffed in front of her. Though from the look on her face, she saw the restraints as a game. Her eyes lit up with intrigue and I could practically see the cogs in her mind starting to turn as she struggled with them.
As soon as I saw this woman, I felt all of my nerve endings set alight. I wanted to turn the screen off, or look away. But once I was looking at the screen, I couldn’t bring myself to tear my eyes away. “Let’s try this again.” There was a woman offscreen. She sounded young. Too young to be in that kind of authority. I figured there was no way teenagers were being hired as special ops agents, but I guessed I was wrong. She cleared her throat. “It is 4:35 exactly. August 5th 2021. My name is Agent Lemrac,” she stated. “I am asking once again for you to comply with us. As I have said several times, the court are willing to lessen your sentence if you plead guilty with insanity.”
The woman surprised me with a snorting laugh. She seemed to come alive, leaning forward with animated features, her brow reaching her hairline. She was acting like a child, bouncing up and down in the seat, her lips stretching into a wider grin. “What did you just say?”
There was a pause. I could tell the woman was intentionally antagonising the interviewer.
“It means you have been legally declared insane,” the interviewer stumbled over her words slightly. “Mrs Summers, it would be in your best interest to work with us to lessen your current sentence which at the moment is standing at,” the sounds of shuffling paper crackled through the speakers. The interviewer cleared her throat again rustling paper. “Thirty six years. Without parole.”
The woman didn’t speak, only continued to smile—and the interviewer delved further into the sentence. “If you do in fact plead guilty with declared insanity, you will be sentenced to a program which is in the process of supporting and rehabilitating people with your…” she caught herself for a moment. I could tell this interviewer had a biased opinion and it was definitely showing through her interviewing style. I could hear the rapid intakes of her breath as she hurried through what seemed to be a script she was reading from. “Conditions.” She finished. “The Redwood program aims to help people exactly like you.”
Redwood? I thought.
Like… Camp Redwood?
Rowan whistled behind me. I guess I could call that a reaction. The guy was probably still in shock after seeing Café de Teddy splattered all over little Cassie’s cabin floor. I should have known those little bitches weren’t playing Operation for eight hours straight. Turning my attention from Rowan and back to the screen, the woman in the jumpsuit appeared to have changed tactics. Her expression twisted into nonchalance. She leaned back in her chair. “I am not pleading insane because I am not insane.”
“Mrs Summers—”
The woman cut her off. “I am not crazy.” She raised her hands “I am doing what needs to be done.” She leaned forward. “Humanity suffers in the skin. We age and die— and how is that fair? What if we want to see the next millennium? And the next two millennia after that? Why should our bodies dictate our lifespan? Why should we sit here and wait to rot and wither and die when we have the intelligence and mindset to do it? If nobody else is willing to throw ethics aside to take a step forwards in human evolution, I should do it myself.” She folded her arms across her chest, again, like a child. “I did what was to be done.”
“Dr. Summers.” The interviewer’s tone grew stiff. “You and your colleagues conducted illegal and unethical procedures on your family and friends—as well as four other victims.”
The woman inclined her head. “You have a daughter, am I correct? I have a son.”
“A child you killed, Dr Summers.” The interviewer retorted in a hiss which was definitely expressing emotion. She ignored the mention of her daughter, but I could tell it had rattled her to her core. Her voice had cracked. This case was close to her.
That was obvious. Without seeing the interviewer herself, I could sense how uncomfortable she was, shuffling in the chair. Every so often I would hear the sound of her rubbing her hands on her knees and tapping her shoe against the chair leg. She oozed anxiety, not just from her tone of voice, but the way the frame seemed to move with her. “Dr. Summers, you used your son in your research, along with several of his friends. This was not science.” Her voice shook. I heard her sharp inhale. Unprofessional, but very human. Instead of staying stoic and keeping to script, this agent was cracking apart. “It was murder.”
“Agent Lemrac, concentrate on the interview only.” An official voice crackled through what sounded like an intercom on screen.
“Got it.” She spoke through her teeth.
The woman was finding wounds and pressing on them. She was scanning the interviewer for vulnerabilities and preying on every insecurity. She leaned back speaking through a sigh. “Without my son’s sacrifice we wouldn’t have created an answer to death. To growing old and dying, and leaving loved ones behind.” Her voice softened into a murmur, but I didn’t trust it.
After identifying the shattering pieces of this interviewer which were very clear visible in her view, the woman was taking advantage.
“Agent Lemrac, you have a daughter. Am I correct in saying her name is Mari?
“That… that is not relevant.”
“Glioblastoma.” Dr. Summers lips curved into a sickening smile hidden behind mocking sympathy. “A sickness of the brain--which, unfortunately, I cannot fix. If your daughter’s brain was in my hands, I would try. However, not even a brand new body would help her. One which would never age or grow sick. And for that, I am deeply, deeply sorry.” She reached her cuffed hands forwards. “My condolences, Agent Lemrac. Honestly. I have to hand it to you. You are incredibly brave for coming here today and talking to me while abandoning your sick child.” She shook her head.
“Your daughter is dying of an incurable illness, suffering inside fragile skin which will break and fall apart and be unable to keep her standing for much longer. While my son will live on forever. He will see every millennia, a planet which will crumble and build itself back together. And maybe the end of the universe itself.” There was a twitch in her expression and a glitter in her eye I did not recognise. Insanity.
She was fucking insane. I was seeing the pure of it, the depraved and disgusting gleam in eyes empty of remorse and regret. This woman did not care what she had done. I could tell from the look on her face. If she had the chance, she would do this again.
But there was no way they were trying to say her cruelty and complete disregard for her son’s life was due to insanity.
“You are sick, Dr. Summers.” The interviewer said after a moment of gathering herself.
The woman shook her head with a chuckle. “I told you. I am not sick--”
“Sick in the head!” The interviewer’s voice exploded through the speakers in a shriek—a terrified cry she had been trying to hold in. I finally saw her—or at least the back of her. She was a young woman with light blonde hair falling loose on her shoulders. She was trembling. Slamming her hands down on the table, she screamed at the orange jumpsuit woman.
“You are psychologically fucked in the head! You psycho bitch! That is my sister!” She spoke through strangled sobs rattling her whole body. “Mari is my little sister. She is not my child.”
Her breaths were strangled and harboured. I noticed figures looming in the background, but she was continuing. “You killed your own fucking son,” she spat. “You are not legally insane, you are sick!” she shrieked. “You planned and put this together! You sit there and you talk about your son like he’s a… like he’s a tool! You deserve to rot. Do you hear me?” I noticed the orange jumpsuit woman was still smiling, satisfied with the interview’s reaction. Her words were spoken in a vicious poison as she leaned forward and spat directly in orange jumpsuit’s face.
“Agent Lemrac!” Whoever her superiors were—were panicking. “I told you not to turn it off. I knew this was going to happen. Can we stop the demonstration, please? Human emotions present inside an Aceville soldier are too powerful—"
Voices were murmuring in the background, and Agent Lemrac raised her hands. “I want to stop.” She choked out, her hands trembling. She spoke like she still had control over the situation and wasn’t being apprehended. “I want to stop. Do you hear me?” The interviewer was crying, I realized. “Stop the recording! I can’t do this. Oh god, I think I’m going to be sick—”
When the footage ended in a burst of static, I found myself backing away, something slimy creeping its way up my throat.
The woman in the orange jumpsuit who had murdered her son and countless others in what sounded like an attempt at playing god, was Eleanor Summers. I thought back to Teddy’s corpse, and the surgical precision of every organ’s removal. The young interviewer had mentioned colleagues of Eleanor.
Was it possible that Camp Redwood was in fact nothing more than a rehabilitation camp for murderous criminals? There was a loud bang from above, and I was torn from my thoughts.
I turned to Rowan, who had been unusually quiet. And I realized why, when I twisted around to find him three inches from my face, his laboured breath tickling my cheek.
The boy jumped back with a chuckle—like me noticing him was some kind of game, before diving back into the chair. I did notice something odd, as my thoughts spiralled. Rowan couldn’t sit still. Slumped in the leather spinning chair, he fingers tapped a rhythm on the armrests while his feet jumped up and down. In the dim light of the bunker, I glimpsed a sheen of sweat glistening on his forehead and the flesh of his neck. He looked to be… feverish—and now that I was looking at him properly, all of my attention on the boy, I noticed small things which seemed… off about him.
For one, he wasn’t coming up with a plan. Rowan always had a plan. Even if he wasn’t completely sure of it, or was completely winging it. This time though, he was strangely quiet. I found my voice when he stuck out his tongue at me. “What are you looking at?”
“Rowan.” I spoke softly, careful not to garner attention from above us where Harry and Carmel were still clamouring around, playing games. “Are you… feeling okay?” I asked, when he turned back to the laptop, manically biting his fingernails.
“I dunnnooooo, Josie! Am I feeeeeeling okaaaaaayyyyy?” He surprised me with an uncharacteristic laugh.
But I did know it.
I knew it from earlier when he reacted to Allison’s bunker and I had been too freaked out to realize that I was dragging along the enemy with me.
Because the fucking idiot had consumed animal crackers. I had seen him for myself earlier, pouring a pack into his mouth for a snack. Which meant either the ‘kids’ had intentionally dosed him with mind altering sugary snacks, or the more likely, he could not resist those preservatives which was the equivalent of caffeine. It’s not like I could blame him when he harboured the weight of an entire camp, but come on, did he really have to sacrifice his own fucking mind to keep himself awake?
Rowan wasn’t just biting. His nails. He was gnawing. Which he previously thought was a filthy habit. He had yelled at a camper for chewing on her nails a few days earlier.
Now that I was noticing it, I couldn’t… stop noticing it. The boy’s whole demeanour had changed; the way he was sinking into the chair, instead of sitting up straight like usual—- I used to call it having a stick up his ass. The boy started typing on the laptop, ignoring me. But when I watched the pattern of his fingers, he was just typing gibberish. Footsteps pounded above us, Harry and Carmel acting as the kid’s’ brainwashed foot-soldiers. Or, more likely somehow, if the animal crackers had caused the littles, or I guess, the fully grown forty year old criminals, to relapse in age-- then maybe it was possible for the same thing to happen to us. To Rowan.
I could feel myself starting to back away, but there was nowhere to run. I just slammed into a cupboard. My gaze flicked to Rowan again, who was tapping a beat on the laptop tracking pad, swaying back and forth, his eyes elsewhere before his gaze found mine. “Marcoooooo!” Harry shouted from above, giggling with Carmel.
I had to guess their mental age had to be at least 8-10 years old. Which meant I wasn’t just dealing with a camp full of forty-year-old psycho’s, I was also dealing with mentally relapsed counselors acting like toddlers.
Rowan seemed to jolt in the chair, twisting his head around, his eyes suddenly incredibly childlike and playful, and very Un-Rowan, were finding the ceiling, his mouth stretching into a smile, like he was seeing butterflies. His eyes flashed to me, and I caught a twitch in his lip. I knew that look. It was the look on my seven year old sister, who knew mom was mad at me, and wanted to make it even worse.
His cheeks were starting to blossom scarlet from what must have been the overwhelming urge to laugh. Rowan pressed his lips together and held in a breath like a hamster, and the asshole was fucking with me. Waiting for me to beat him to it by accident. Kids were fucking ruthless, but there was something terrifying about an 18 year old with a little kid’s mind.
I lifted my index to my lips, miming for him not to even try, but the boy just mimicked me, bugging out his eyes and pressing his finger to his grinning mouth. “Don’t you fucking dare.” I managed to whisper. The boy was definitely playing his own game, moving in twitching movements, baiting me. When he cupped his mouth, I almost let out a cry, but then he dropped his arms with a giggle, as if to say, “I’m just kidding!”
Slowly, I turned around, grabbed the salt I’d found in Allison’s cupboard, and a flat can of soda. Without making too much movement, I poured a handful of salt into the can. But Rowan seemed to know exactly what I was doing. Because in the time it was taking me to advance towards him with the can of salty soda, one arm shakily ready to grab hold of him, and put him into a headlock, he was cupping his mouth, all logic and everything adult, everything he had been as our leader, igniting in playful eyes, leaving me the last one standing.
“Pollloooooo!”
By the time Rowan had managed to reveal our hiding place in a spluttered laugh, I had hold of the squirming boy, one arm wrapped around his neck, my other forcing the can of soda into his mouth. I had definitely miscalculated his strength. During camp Redwood activities, he was always the last one to come back from the trail, holding his knees and panting. I figured he was unfit. However, I was wrong. Underneath his shirt, the guy had some serious muscles.
It was like attacking a brick wall. However, Rowan was mentally a kid. So, I had my intelligence and logic on my side. When it became obvious I wasn’t going to get anywhere with brute strength, I resorted to tickling him, which made him squirm, squeaking out a laugh. When he opened his mouth to yell at me to stop, I took my chance, thrusting the can into his lips and holding his nose so he swallowed it down.
“No!” His laughter turned into muffled yelling, as he batted his fists at my chest. “No, no, no! Get off, get off!”
His body convulsed as the salt did its job, causing the boy to lurch to his knees and choke up forbidden animal crackers in a gooish sludge which turned my stomach. By the time Rowan seemed half himself and half not, still kneeling, his head pressed against the floor, Harry was poking his head through the door with a goonish grin. “Found you!” He giggled, before forcing the door open, allowing Carmel and Callen, freshly caught and mentally turned into littles, to advance down the stairs with equally terrifying grins. There was something wrong with Harry’s face, and I only realized it when the guy himself was hauling me from the bunker, Carmel dragging a barely responsive Rowan. There was nothing in Harry’s expression, only blind childish excitement at winning the game. When he dragged me out of Allison’s cabin and threw me to the ground, I realized he too had insane strength I had not been expecting. But that thought quickly retracted when I was seeing his face in the light of a crescent moon lighting up the sky an eerie glow. Harry’s cheeks were puffy and swollen, his right eye way bigger than it should have been.
When he spoke, his voice was more of a lisp. This was something far more realistic than magical animal crackers fucking with his brain.
“He needs help!” I managed to choke out when Carmel wrapped jump-rope around my wrists. Next to me, Rowan was refusing to get up, still choking up salty soda, groaning into his hands. Every time Callen tried to restrain him, he hissed out like an animal.
“Do you hear me?!” I struggled violently. “Harry needs—”
BANG.
Is what it felt like. The feeling of something—what felt and sounded like a toy car—colliding with my temples, sent me onto the ground, my head spinning itself off of its axis. I remember lying on my back and frowning at the moon which almost looked like it was getting closer to me, blurring into a white ball of light—before reality sunk in, and it was in fact Carmel’s converse coming down to finish me off. I didn’t stay knocked out for long. But I did dream.
I think you can call it a dream? I was lying in bed at home; my room drowned in the dark. I was cosy, curled up in my blankets, when a clammy hand slammed over my mouth, rousing me from slumber. There were two figures in my room. They didn’t have faces. They just existed as shadows, silhouettes. Before one of them raised something above their head, and… impact.
It was the same impact as the toy car hitting me, snapping me back to that night. It wasn’t a dream. Because I remembered his clammy fingers over my mouth, and his hisses for me to shut up as he dragged me from my room.
My parents stood in front of me with expressions of sympathy. Basked in warm light, my mom and dad looked almost otherworldly. “For the best.” Was what they mouthed when my own phantom screams slammed into me. I asked them why, and they didn’t reply, allowing him to pull me further and further from what I knew, from my life as I knew it. But.. that couldn’t be real. I had memories of getting on the bus to camp Redwood. I could recall the whole journey. So, why… why was my tangled mind saying otherwise?
When I gathered myself, the first thing I realized was I was sitting down. I was outside, cool night air grazing my bare arms. There was something attached to me, jerking violently, And it took me several disorienting blinks to understand that I was tied back to back with Rowan. My head pounded, and something wet and warm dripped down my temple. Great. I could add head injury to the long list of things to worry about.
“Let me go you little fucking witch.”
Rowan was back to himself, though from the muffled hissing and the sound of choking—I had to guess he was being force-fed animal crackers.
“Let me—mpphmmm. little…. fucking… mphmmphhmhppmm!”
“Rowan.” I managed to get out in a croak. Through flickering eyes, I caught glimpse of a familiar figure dancing around us. Shivers rocketed down my spine, and I wrenched at the jump-rope restraints, but they did a surprisingly job of restraining my arms behind my back.
Eleanor was with Rowan, while Eli was knelt in front of me. Looking at him, the boy had definitely aged in the face—and I couldn’t help wondering what exactly he had done as a forty something year old to be sent to this place.
“Josie!” Rowan responded in a wail. “Josie. Wake the FUCK up.”
“Stop swearing.”
Eleanor spoke with the cold tone of her actual age.
“Oh, yeah?” Rowan spluttered. “Fuck you.” The boy’s laugh was still rough from almost vomiting his insides out from too much salt intake. “I’m sorry, you were a fucking boomer all along?!” He wriggled in the restraints, lunging forwards, which sent me backwards.
“Stop swearing, Rowan.” Was all the girl responded with calmly.
“Like I’m going to listen to you!” He sneered. “Fuck, fuck, fuckity, fucking fuck!” What are you going to do, huh? Bite me with your false teeth?” The sound of saliva hitting skin made me wince. He was pissed. I had no doubt his completely rational anger was going to get us killed. Rowan was also somehow getting mixed up between forty and eighty. Though he was unwillingly snacking on mind bending sugary goodness.
“Fudge, Rowan.” Eleanor spoke in a giggle.
“What?!”
“Say fudge. Not fuck.”
“No.”
His hiss of pain caught me off guard. I don’t know what she was doing to him, but it was hurting him.
“You fudging fudge! I’m going to fudging kill you when I get out of these fudging ropes—“ his manic cursing became a muffled yell.
“Say fudge,” Eleanor hummed, followed by his hiss when the palm of her hand skinned his cheek. “Fuck is a bad word. You even said so yourself and you’re my favourite counselor.”
He heaved out a breath.
“You fudge,” Rowan spat. “When I get out of this, I am going to fudging kill you, you fudging—” His manic ranting morphed, once again, into muffled yelling, after another fistful of animal crackers were forced into his mouth. When I risked twisting around, I could see his rebellion slowly starting to simmer out as he relaxed slightly. I wanted to yell at him to keep a clear head before cold fingers were dipping under my chin and forcing my head around where I found myself face to face with Eli.
“I like you, Josie,” he said, before untying me and pulling me to my feet. Now at the age of nine or ten, he was a lot stronger. When I tried to pull away, the cruel blade of a knife grazed my gut. I caught his grin. “But we don’t need you.” Eli pointed to Rowan.
“We just want them.”
I followed his pointer finger which went from Rowan to Harry and Carmel, who were just standing there like fucking idiots, probably awaiting the next game. Harry’s face was getting redder. It looked like he was suffocating, and yet his grin was growing wider and wider, splitting his lips apart. “Rowan Atlas.” Eleanor said, dragging him to his feet. Something was stapled to his forehead head, which caused him to howl in pain, hissing another strangled line of “Fudge”. but I couldn’t read what it was.
“Camp leader. Intelligent, and problem solving skills.”
“Harry Carlisle.” Eli nodded his head with a smile. “Quick thinker. Strong minded.”
“Carmel Locke.” Cassie spoke behind me. She had her arms folded, a wry smile on her lips. “Smarter than she makes out—- an independent learner, and can work well under pressure.”
Looking at these kids, I felt sick to my stomach. They were planning something—and had the intelligence of renowned scientists, which was what I gathered from the footage on the MacBook. “What?” was all I could hiss out, as Eli prodded the blade of the knife into my back, ushering me to walk. “What are you talking about?”
“Duh.” He spoke in a more tweeny giggle. “Like I said, Miss Josie. You’re my favorite counselor but we don’t need you, so I’m going to use you for parts.” He laughed when a shiver spiderwebbed down my spine. “See! I told you I was going to show you my collection!”
“But… what do you need them for?”
Eli pressed his index finger to his lips with a laugh before forcing me to face forwards. “That’s a secret!”
When I didn’t, or couldn’t move, he shoved me into a stumbling power-walk, and I managed to turn my head quickly, making feverish eye contact with Rowan.
“Rowan.” I said calmly through the gutter in my throat. “Get…. Get help.”
If I was going to die, I needed him to get a hold of himself and somehow alert the outside world what was going on.
“From whom, Josie?!” He wailed back—and as I was dragged away, I could once again sense the childish undertones in his voice.
I had no choice but to obey Eli’s orders. If I didn’t want a knife in my back. He took me to the main lunch cabin, which, when I set foot inside, almost sent me to my knees.
Something lurched inside me, and I was screaming with no voice, staggering backwards, only to be shoved onto my face. In front of me was what had been the lunch hall, fully converted into the beginning of a laboratory.
What had been cafeteria tables were fashioned into makeshift gurney’s and beds, and I was looking at all of the missing counselors. Yuri and Noah had been skinned completely, their faces laid out on a makeshift surgical table. Joey had been ripped open, his heart and brain removed, a glittering metallic substance creeping its way across his forehead. It was then when I remembered Eleanor Summers words.
She wanted to prevent death and preserve the human mind. Looking at what was in front of me, this was the start of it. There was equipment I had never seen before. Lily’s body was empty, carved out completely, tubes forced inside her. When I glimpsed her fingers move and begin to ball into a fist, I saw red. I saw fucking red. The exit was so close and yet Eli, fucking Eli, wielded his knife. I think that is when part of me gave up. My brain just stopped. It short circuited. Seeing my friends murdered and yet somehow being kept alive through playing god, my body slumped to the ground. I was numb. Completely numb.
I’m not sure what would have happened if those bloody saws and instruments which had been used on my friends were used on me too.
Luckily, that did not happen. Before Eli could get his slimy hands on me, he crumpled to the ground in an almost cartoon-like fashion, and standing over me was Harry. Who was looking better. When he grasped hold of me and helped me up, I only had one word. “Out.” And he was nodding, his eyes glistening as he drunk in our friends’ fate.
“How?” I managed to sputter out, when we made it out of the cabin, ducking behind a tree. Harry turned to me, motioning for me to shut up. There was a group of now ten to eleven year olds already running around, searching for what I guessed was him.
“I’m allergic to peanut butter,” Harry murmured, his grasp tightening on my wrist as he led me across the camp, the two of us stumbling.
“What, and you just magically healed?”
He didn’t respond to that, which bothered me.
“The bunker is our best shot,” I hissed out. “I think we can get in contact with someone down there.” I paused, unable to stop myself. “What makes you so important?”
“Dunno. Maybe I’m their favorite.”
When we found Allison’s cabin, which was more of a safehouse (an exposed safehouse) I found Rowan sitting on the wooden porch with his legs swinging over the side. “Rowan!” Harry groaned. I found it hard to believe their roles had been switched. Now he was the one yelling at the camp-leader. “I told you to stay inside!”
He ushered the boy inside, before barricading the door with some hefty looking equipment. I could tell from the grin on his face that our so-called leader was once again no longer himself.
I had to bite back a groan. “You’re kidding.” I said, pointing to Rowan, who buried his head in his knees and blew a raspberry. “Does he look and act like our leader right now?!”
“It’s Rowan, Josie.”
“He’s a liability.”
“He’s our friend! Wouldn’t Rowan do the same?”
Yes, he would. But. He would also realize we’re lost causes.
“Gag him with something.” I said. “If he makes any more noise, we’re dumping him.”
“He’s a kid!”
“Just the mind of one.”
I don’t know how animal crackers worked, but his age seemed to be progressively younger. This time he just sat with wide eyes watching us.
Harry almost tore apart the place looking for means of communication, before an old fashioned ringing sound made me jump.
“What was that?” Harry turned to me with his lip curled.
“How am I supposed to know?!” I hissed. “Keep looking!” But when I ducked under the table, my hands crawled under the desk, finding a wire—and attached to that, an ancient looking phone which looked straight out of a 1940’s movie, a bright green rotary phone.
Hesitantly, I answered it, lifting the phone to my ear. “Hello?”
“Did you awaken the subjects, Agent Salta?"
The voice on the other end was a woman, an oldish sounding woman with the tinge of a British accent.
“What?” I shot a look at Harry before shaking my head. “No. My name is Josie Greenfield. We’re at Camp Redwood, and we need help.”
The woman paused.
“Where is Agent Salta?” She cleared her throat. “This line is reserved for communication with agents only.”
“I don’t know who the fuck you’re talking about!" I squeaked out. “My name is Josie, and whatever is happening here, we need help!”
“Josie. Did you awaken the subjects?”
I paused after a moment, shooting Harry a look when he tried to take the phone off of me. “Yes.”
“And… are our agents unavailable?”
“I don’t understand.”
“When a health and safety breach is activated, our agents are awakened to deal with the Project Spearhead subjects if they were to ever go rogue, or become conscious enough to think. Josie, can you tell me what is in front of you? Describe it to me.”
I held my breath. Next to the hidden phone under the desk was what looked like mismatched wires, all of which had been severed. I lowered myself slowly, poking at mess. “Wires. I see… cut up wires.” I whispered. “Does this mean they know about you?”
She hummed. “Ah…That makes sense. The only way to activate our sleeper handlers would be to send out the signal. You appear to have been sabotaged. Unless activated manually, our agents cannot help you. I am sorry. They are your problem now.” The woman paused.
“If I were you, I would hope and pray they have not sabotaged the self-destruct. If you find that, then you may be able to save yourselves and find peace.” She cleared her throat. “Thank you for your service, Josie Greenfield.”
“Wait.” I managed to get out. “Wait, no! You can’t just… you can’t leave us! We need help!”
I found myself yelling at nothing when the phone went dead. The dull tone of the dead ringtone was clanging in my ears before footsteps from up above. “Fuck this.” Harry picked up a lead pipe. “They’re still little kids, right? I mean, their head must still be partly kids—- so let’s fucking beat their heads in.”
He noticed something, then, starting forwards towards the mess of files I had left earlier. Harry knelt on the ground and picked up Eli’s file, his eyes wide. But he wasn’t staring at the dates confirming the little boy’s age.
Instead, Harry pointed at the bottom of the file. “I don’t want to freak you out, Josie,” he whispered. Initially, I didn’t know what he was trying to show before I glimpsed notes scrawled at the bottom of the file, followed by a signature. “But I’m pretty sure that is my fucking writing.”
Harry was right.
I pulled the paperwork off of him, flicking through each file before turning my eyes to him. “Who the fuck are you?”
A clanging sound from above broke the tension, and whatever Harry was about to reply with was strangled in his throat. He slammed a hand over his mouth.
“Guys?”
The voice twisted me up inside, threatening to release a shriek from my mouth I had managed to clamp shut.
Teddy.
“Are you down here?” His voice was strained, and had an odd tone to it. “I can’t… I can’t see you.”
…
Can someone please tell me what the fuck is going on?! It’s been a blur of a week. We’ve managed to stay down here, surviving off of Allison’s rations. Rowan isn’t getting any better. He seems to have stopped mentally de-ageing at the age of maybe six. Harry has spent the last few days trying to get in contact with anyone, but it’s like they are IGNORING US.
I’ve been looking through everything I can find on Project Spearhead, but nothing points to Harry being involved. So. How is his signature all over the files? How is it possible that two friends I thought I knew several days ago, are now complete strangers?
Teddy keeps coming back.
He’s crying out to us.
I think he’s… in pain.
My god, I can’t stand this anymore. Please. CAMP REDWOOD NEEDS HELP.

My bf (22M) and I (22F) have been dating for almost 3 years now. You can definitely say that in our relationship, he’s the golden retriever and I am the black cat. He’s very caring and supportive, always there to comfort me in any way, which I love about him. Unlike my boyfriend, who is pretty simple in his habits, I am more nuanced and we think very differently sometimes.
We were in a long distance relationship for a while, and he came to visit me for my birthday in December of 2022. I am very superstitious when it comes to celebrating birthdays, because in my culture, celebrating your birthday early is considered “bad luck”.
My boyfriend came the day before my birthday, and I’m guessing he wanted to surprise me by getting me a cake, but as I was going to university from my apartment, I saw him walk out of the metro at my station with a box (I knew it was the cake). We made a joke about it, as if we didn’t see each other, keeping the cake a secret you’d say. I had to go to campus to have a late meeting with my research project group.
I came home at around 9:30 pm. As I opened the door to my dorm, my boyfriend was standing there with my cake and all the candles lit, singing me happy birthday. It was still the day before my birthday.
I had an absolutely uncontrollable reaction that I never experienced ever in my life. I started crying and screaming, saying it’s too early, repeating “why did you do it so early?”. Long story short, my boyfriend started crying and so did I. God, it was so stupid, and I feel so bad. I just really hate surprises, and I wouldn’t say I’m that superstitious. Something about this incident just let out a monster from within. I guess I was confused why he didn’t just wait a couple more hours until it was 12am, or until the next morning, since I already knew about the cake.
We calmed down, talked it through, and devoured the cake 20 minutes later. It was delicious. But this episode still haunts me from time to time, I feel like such a bitch.

Hi Guys! I just wanted to come and share my experience on Lexapro with you all that may have just been prescribed or are looking into starting it.
So a little bit of a back story, I (20F), use to smoke weed often with my friends. I had one bad experience which led to me having long term anxiety and panic attacks. I went to the doctor around september 2022 and was diagnosed with adhd and anxiety/depression due to my inactivity and low motivation. I was prescribed Ritalin (32mg extended release) and lexapro (10mg). To clarify, the ritalin is not being taken daily, only as needed.
Starting the lexapro, for the first week i had a little dizziness but it was not unbearable. From then on, i had no problems. My anxiety went away, I wanted to go out more and do things, and no panic attacks. I was in a relationship at the time and I did notice a low sex drive but it also wasn’t unbearable. I had a checkup about a month after i was prescribed and my weight was the same (172lbs). My next checkup was 4 months away since i had no complaints and everything was going well. When it was time for the next checkup I had to reschedule for the next month so 4 months ended up being 5 months. In that time frame, I gained 10lbs (182lbs). I had not changed my diet nor was i less active.
The relationship I was in when i first started the lexapro had ended. That’s when i noticed another change in myself. The breakup did not bother me at all. I was so nonchalant about it. My emotions had been steady the whole time. Wasn’t able to cry, never got bothered by anything. I was very numb. To me, this isn’t necessarily a bad thing because it helped me to think more with my brain rather than with my emotions. But anyways, after the breakup I got a little critical of myself. A guy called me a catfish, my brother told me i was gaining weight, customers at my job asking if i was pregnant. It broke my heart because i’ve always had issues with my body. That’s when I decided to start eating healthier and walking daily. No matter what I did i could NOT lose the weight. So, i stopped taking the lexapro. It has been about a month now and i’ve lost 6lbs. I was switched over to zoloft but i’m still scared to take it.
I don’t want my experience to scare anyone especially with the weight gain. Lexapro did help me in a number of ways. I’m still a die hard lexa-hoe but i want to be transparent about the side effects i had. Everyone’s body is different so your experience with it might be/is unique. I’d love to hear about others experiences if you guys wanna talk about it in a more personal way :)