Boneless skinless chicken thigh nutrition facts

E-40 sausages at Vallejo club

2023.06.03 05:32 mrrickyg E-40 sausages at Vallejo club

E-40 sausages at Vallejo club
Wife brought these home, will report back later
submitted by mrrickyg to Costco [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 00:55 Vegetable-Airline528 People that do this Are the A$$hold

People that do this Are the A$$hold submitted by Vegetable-Airline528 to u/Vegetable-Airline528 [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 23:10 DrinkDrinkFight Looking for advice on canning cooked meat

Hello there, /canning! I've canned vegetables before but never meat. Since I can acidic stuff, I only have a boiling water bath, not a pressure cooker. However, this weekend there was a stunning sale on boneless skinless chicken breasts and now I have over fifty pounds of chicken to make into barbecue.
Is it probably safe, assuming I keep all my stuff clean, to take cooked barbecue chicken right from the slow cooker, put it into canning jars, seal it, and run a water bath canning cycle? Or do I likely need to do additional steps to keep the meat safe?
I'll be using a North Carolina style, vinegar-based, barbecue sauce because I feel like the additional acidity can only help.
Thanks for taking the time to read and reply!
submitted by DrinkDrinkFight to Canning [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 18:41 M_Tootles The Recursive Homecomings Of Petyr & Theon Part 10 of 10: Oswell & Aeron; Lothar & Dagmer; The Closing Twist (Spoilers Extended)

This post is the last post in a series looking at the massive amount of 'rhyming' recursivity I believe exists between (a) the homecoming of Petyr Baelish to the Fingers and (b) the homecoming of Theon Greyjoy to Pyke.
While this series/post can be read simply as a study 'for its own sake' of the curious recursion between these storylines, it is my belief that the 'rhyming' explored here between the stories of Petyr and Theon may exist (at least in part) to foreshadow that, like Theon, Petyr Littlefinger, is (among other things) a scion of ironborn kings, because Petyr is Hoare-ish: I.e. because Petyr's blood is (in some part) the blood of the ironborn kings of House Hoare of Orkmont and, later, Harrenhal.
This post is also post 25 of 25 in my broader series on the topic of a Hoare-ish Littlefinger, which is indexed [HERE].
Even if I'm wrong about Littlefinger's lineage, the 'rhyming' recursivity between the homecomings of Theon and Petyr detailed in this series remains, and certainly merits attention.
NOTE: In what follows, all uncited quotes are from ASOS Sansa VI, which describes Petyr's homecoming to his "Drearfort" tower of the 'Smallest Finger', or ACOK Theon I, which describes Theon's homecoming to "drear" Pyke.
As in past posts, I sometimes use "→" as shorthand for "'prefigures' and/or 'informs' and/or 'is reworked by' and/or 'finds a recursive rhyme in'.
As in: ACOK Theon I ASOS Sansa VI.
This post picks up straight-away from where Part 9 left off. You can read Part 9 [HERE].
If you want to begin at the beginning, Part 1 is [HERE].

Aeron & Oswell

After Theon's homecoming chapter opens with Theon thinking "There was no safe anchorage at Pyke", which is copied nearly verbatim during Petyr's homecoming with Sansa, we see Theon anticipating his first glimpse of Pyke castle, and read this sentence:
Theon drew the hood of his cloak up against the spray, and looked for home.
That line proves to be a key part of a pun-tastic 'rhyme' between (a) Theon coming ashore from the Myraham and meeting Aeron and (b) Sansa coming ashore from the Merling King with the aid of Oswell.
I'll explain.
Note first that Oswell, who is…
tall and gangling, with long white hair and a great hooked nose, with eyes shaded by a cowl [like a monk's cowl!]… (ACOK Theon V)
—clearly 'rhymes' with Aeron, an ascetic priest (see Oswell's monk-ish cowl) who is…
Tall and thin, with… a beak of a nose… [and] ropes of dried seaweed were braided through his waist-long black hair and untrimmed beard.
They're set up as yin and yang: Tall and similarly built with notable noses and long hair… but one has "long white hair", the other "long black hair", and Aeron has an "untrimmed beard" while Oswell is clean-shaven.
Aeron's beard is not simply a beard, though, but a beard with seaweed in it, which 'rhymes' with Oswell being not simply clean-shaven, but clean-shaven in a sea-faring way, as his "windburnt face"—
She studied the old man's lined windburnt face, hook nose, white hair, and huge knuckly hands. (ASOS Sansa VI)
—prefigures the "wind-chafed skin" of Aeron's niece Asha, which is tagged as typical of the sea-faring ironborn—
Ironborn, he knew at a glance; lean and long-legged, with… wind-chafed skin, strong sure hands….
—as are her notably "strong sure hands", which similarly 'rhyme' with Oswell's notably "huge knuckly hands".
SIDEBAR: As for Aeron's robes here being "green and grey" ("and blue"), this underlines that Petyr's oft-mentioned "grey-green" eyes are like the sea, which (as I've mentioned in previous posts) suggests per Archmaester Haereg's maxim—
"You may dress an ironman in silks and velvets, teach him to read and write and give him books, instruct him in chivalry and courtesy and the mysteries of the Faith… but when you look into his eyes, the sea will still be there, cold and grey and cruel." (TWOIAF)
—that Littlefinger is, at least in part, an ironman.
END SIDEBAR
The first thing we're told about Aeron after Theon realizes who he is is that "he washed up safe on shore"—
A memory prodded at Theon. In one of his rare curt letters, Lord Balon had written of his youngest brother going down in a storm, and turning holy when he washed up safe on shore. "Uncle Aeron?" he said doubtfully.
—which prefigures Oswell splashing his way ashore at the Smallest Finger:
Oswell and Lothor splashed their way ashore, as did Littlefinger himself.
(If Oswell is Aeron-ish, surely Petyr making like Oswell and splashing about in the surf here could foreshadow that he is Hoare-ish. And perhaps some kind of religious figure as well.)

Drawn Up Hoods

With that Oswell/Aeron 'rhyme' in mind, consider again that, as Theon approaches castle Pyke on the Myraham
Theon drew the hood of his cloak up against the spray, and looked for home.
Sound familiar? That's because it's reworked when Sansa is rowed ashore by the "gangling", Aeron-esque Oswell:
Lothor and old Oswell rowed them ashore. Sansa huddled in the bow under her cloak with the hood drawn up against the wind….
When Sansa gets to shore, "two old men" help to make sure she doesn't get even a little bit wet—
The two old men waded out up to their thighs to lift Sansa from the boat so she would not get her skirts wet.
—which was, of course, exactly the thing Theon was trying to avoid back in ACOK when he "drew the hood of his cloak up against the spray", as Sansa drew hers "up against the wind" when Oswell rowed her in.

Gangplank → Gangling.

GRRM is just warming up. When Theon reaches Lordsport and disembarks from the Myraham, he, too, avoids getting wet. At least initially. Where Sansa uses "gangling" Oswell to come ashore, Theon uses… a "gangplank":
Without waiting for a reply [from Myraham's captain], he strode down the gangplank. "Innkeeper," he barked. "I require a horse".

Kneeling Servants

The innkeeper never gets Theon his horse, of course (of course), because Aeron shows up. And what does gangling white-haired Oswell's black-haired physical mirror Aeron do? He makes Theon get wet after all.
"Kneel."
The ground was all stones[!] and mud. "Uncle, I—"
"Kneel. Or are you too proud now, a lordling of the green lands come among us?"
Theon knelt. He had a purpose here, and might need Aeron's help to achieve it. A crown was worth a little mud and horseshit on his breeches, he supposed.
"Bow your head." Lifting the skin, his uncle pulled the cork and directed a thin stream of seawater down upon Theon's head. It drenched his hair and ran over his forehead into his eyes. Sheets washed down his cheeks, and a finger crept under his cloak and doublet and down his back, a cold rivulet along his spine. The salt made his eyes burn, until it was all he could do not to cry out. He could taste the ocean on his lips. "Let Theon your servant be born again from the sea, as you were," Aeron Greyjoy intoned. "Bless him with salt, bless him with stone, bless him with steel."
Note that Theon kneeling on "stones and mud… and horseshit" before a priest with "seaweed" in his beard is reworked even as Oswell rows Sansa ashore and she huddles in her cloak like Theon, when the Baelish household kneels on rocks covered by nasty seaweed and Sansa dodges sheepshit:
Lothor and old Oswell rowed them ashore. Sansa huddled in the bow under her cloak with the hood drawn up against the wind, wondering what awaited her. Servants emerged from the tower to meet them…. When they recognized Lord Petyr they knelt on the rocks.
[Petyr] led them up the strand over rocks slick with rotting seaweed. … Sansa had to step carefully; there were pellets [i.e. sheepshit] everywhere.

Blessings

Meanwhile, Aeron giving Theon his holy "bless[ing]" is reworked just before Sansa is rowed ashore, when Petyr asks for Sansa's "blessing" after he tells her they're not going to Winterfell and that he's going to wed Lysa:
"So silent, my lady?" said Petyr. "I was certain you would wish to give me your blessing. …"
"I . . . I pray you will have long years together, and many children, and be very happy in one another.
Sansa's reluctant acquiescence — both to giving the blessing and to going ashore and going along with Petyr's plan, which she had not anticipated — echoes Theon's reluctant acquiescence to both Aeron's blessing and Balon's plan of invasion, which he hadn't anticipated.
I suspect Littefinger was fed the line, "So silent, my lady?" before asking for Sansa's blessing as a nod to several pertinent silences in ACOK Theon I. First, the "sullen silence" of the Myraham's captain when he reluctantly acquiesces to Theon taking his would-be salt wife daughter below deck to get a blowjob; second, the "gloom of silence" between Theon and Aeron as they make the final approach to Pyke, post-blessing; and finally, Theon marking the absence of Euron's 'lady', Silence, as he sails into Lordsport:
Theon searched for his uncle Euron's Silence.
Truly, all things come round again.

Getting Wet & Staying Dry 1

But what about Aeron getting Theon pointedly wet? Aeron not only making Theon kneel but getting him wet and then riding with him to Pyke, is reworked (and reversed) not just by Oswell and Lothor rowing Sansa ashore — note the "rode" → "rowed" wordplay:
They [Aeron and Theon] rode in a gloom of silence.
Lothor and old Oswell rowed them ashore.
— and not just by Sansa being carried ashore and kept pointedly dry by two old men who were, seconds earlier, kneeling reverently on the seashore, but also by Aeron-ish Oswell helping Sansa "up" onto The Merling King from his rowboat while assuring her he won't let her fall into the sea, which he makes sure she doesn't:
The rower shipped the oars and helped Sansa to her feet. "Up now. Go on, girl, I got you." Sansa thanked him for his kindness, but received no answer but a grunt. It was much easier going up the rope ladder than it had been coming down the cliff. The oarsman Oswell followed close behind her(ASOS Sansa V)
So: Where Oswell-ish Aeron forces Theon to kneel and then wets him down with seawater, ceremonially "drowning" him after he comes down the "gangplank", the "gangling" Aeron-ish Oswell helps Sansa "to her feet" and then "up" while promising not to let her fall in the sea, where she could drown.

Getting Wet & Staying Dry 2

Aeron forcing Theon to kneel and getting him wet before he "rode" with him to Pyke is also reworked/reversed inside Petyr's tower, when Sansa's 'other' rower Lothor protects Sansa from Marillion's rape attempt— from being (like Theon) forced to get "wet", so to speak:
"My blood is stirred. And yours, I know … there's no wench half so lusty as one bastard born. Are you wet for me?"
"I'm a maiden," she protested.
"Truly? Oh, Alayne, Alayne, my fair maid, give me the gift of your innocence.
The wetness motif is played up again:
"He put a hand on her breast, and squeezed. "Let's get you out of these wet clothes. You wouldn't want them ripped, I know. Come, sweet lady, heed your heart—"
He wants to "get [her] out of [her] wet clothes" so he can get her "wet", so to speak. But where Aeron forced Theon to "kneel" and get wet in language that suddenly reads as quite rapey and spine-chilling—
Sheets washed down his cheeks [which cheeks?], and a finger[!] crept under his cloak and doublet and down his back, a cold rivulet along his spine."
—before he "rode" with him to castle Pyke, Lothor Brune, who "rowed" Sansa ashore, keeps her safe and 'dry':
Sansa heard the soft sound of steel on leather. "Singer," a rough voice said, "best go, if you want to sing again." The light was dim, but she saw a faint glimmer of a blade.
The singer saw it too. "Find your own wench—" The knife flashed, and he cried out. "You cut me!"
"I'll do worse, if you don't go."
And quick as that, Marillion was gone. The other remained, looming over Sansa in the darkness. "Lord Petyr said watch out for you." It was Lothor Brune's voice, she realized.

Dagmer Cleftjaw → Lothor Brune

And what do you know? Oswell's rowing partner Lothor Brune is also prefigured by Theon's homecoming. Not by Aeron, but by Dagmer Cleftjaw, who Theon thinks of as he approaches Lordsport on the Myraham. In fact, there's a huge 'rhyme' between (a) Dagmer Cleftjaw and his "gut-churning scar", on the one hand, and (b) the beginning of ASOS Sansa VI, which describes Lothor Brune and Sansa's upset stomach (i.e. her churning guts) and seemingly permanently scarred psyche, on the other. I'll try to lay out now.
Consider first that as Theon approaches Lordsport on the Myraham, he goes below deck, where he thinks about Dagmer Cleftjaw (along with the sour-like-Aeron Sylas Sourmouth, who was discussed in Part 8):
As the Myraham made her way landward, Theon paced the deck restlessly, scanning the shore. He had not thought to find Lord Balon himself at quayside, but surely his father would have sent someone to meet him. Sylas Sourmouth the steward, Lord Botley, perhaps even Dagmer Cleftjaw. It would be good to look on Dagmer's hideous old face again.
We meet Dagmer in ACOK Theon III,
He smiled himself to show how it was done. It made for a hideous sight. Under a snowy white mane of hair, Dagmer Cleftjaw had the most gut-churning scar Theon had ever seen, the legacy of the longaxe that had near killed him as a boy. The blow had splintered his jaw, shattered his front teeth, and left him four lips where other men had but two. A shaggy beard covered his cheeks and neck, but the hair would not grow over the scar, so a shiny seam of puckered, twisted flesh divided his face like a crevasse through a snowfield "We could hear them singing," the old warrior said. "It was a good song, and they sang it bravely."
Dagmer grinned more often and more broadly than Lord Balon ever had.
Ugly as it was, that smile brought back a hundred memories. Theon had seen it often as a boy, when he'd jumped a horse over a mossy wall, or flung an axe and split a target square. [More fond memories of Dagmer.]
We later learn that Dagmer is "fearsome" and a "fierce fighter" as well, despite being marked as aged by his "white mane of hair". (ADWD The King's Prize)
Dagmer's ship is named Foamdrinker, a double-entendre about ale-drinking, as he likes drinking, as well as reaving songs — especially the one a singer wrote about him:
He knew that would give Dagmer pause. A singer had made a song about the axe that cracked his jaw in half, and the old man loved to hear it. Whenever he was in his cups he would call for a reaving song, something loud and stormy that told of dead heroes and deeds of wild valor. (ACOK Theon III)
Balon puts Dagmer in Theon's reaving detachment. Theon foolishly resents this, not accepting that he is inexperienced and needs and could benefit enormously from a seasoned number two with whom he has a good relationship:
"You are to harry the Stony Shore, raiding the fishing villages and sinking any ships you chance to meet. … Aeron will accompany you, and Dagmer Cleftjaw."
…Theon felt as if he'd been slapped. He was being sent to do reaver's work, burning fishermen out of their hovels and raping their ugly daughters, and yet it seemed Lord Balon did not trust him sufficiently to do even that much. Bad enough to have to suffer the Damphair's scowls and chidings. With Dagmer Cleftjaw along as well, his command would be purely nominal. (ACOK Theon II)
Balon gives Theon Dagmer to help him, but Theon can only see it as an affront, so he tries to sideline him:
Dagmer Cleftjaw stood by the high carved prow of his longship, Foamdrinker. Theon had assigned him the task of guarding the ships; otherwise men would have called it Dagmer's victory, not his. A more prickly man might have taken that for a slight, but the Cleftjaw had only laughed. (ACOK Theon III)

That Splintery Ladder Again & Lothor's Hand Up

Now, remembering that we're introduced to Dagmer Cleftjaw while Theon is still aship en route to Pyke, consider again the first paragraph of Sansa VI, plus a bit more (which of course takes place while Petyr and Sansa are still aship en route to Petyr's Drearfort):
The ladder to the forecastle was steep and splintery, so Sansa accepted a hand up from Lothor Brune. Ser Lothor, she had to remind herself; the man had been knighted for his valor in the Battle of the Blackwater. Though no proper knight would wear those patched brown breeches and scuffed boots, nor that cracked and water-stained leather jerkin. A square-faced stocky man with a squashed nose and a mat of nappy grey hair, Brune spoke seldom. He is stronger than he looks, though. She could tell by the ease with which he lifted her, as if she weighed nothing at all. …
She had seldom ventured out on deck herself. Her little cabin was dank and cold, but Sansa had been sick for most of the voyage . . . sick with terror, sick with fever, or seasick . . . she could keep nothing down, and even sleep came hard. Whenever she closed her eyes she saw Joffrey… dying….
…Even this close to shore, the rolling of the ship made her tummy queasy.…
[Petyr] put a sympathetic arm about her shoulders. "Are you quite well? You look so pale."
"It's only my tummy. The seasickness."
We're subsequently reminded of Brune's "squashed nose" and "mat of nappy grey hair", and told of his "square jaw" and more:
With his squashed nose, square jaw, and nap of woolly grey hair, Brune could not be called comely, but he was not ugly either. … Sober, he was a quiet man, but a strong one. (AFFC Alayne II)
Recall too that Brune saves Sansa from Marillion, who tries to use her as Theon used the captain's daughter.
Having surveyed the field of (word)play, we can now see the 'rhyming':
  • Where Theon goes below deck as he approaches Lordsport and thinks about Dagmer, whose jaw is (verbatim) "splintered", Sansa, with Brune's help, climbs up to the deck using a (verbatim) "splintered" ladder as she approaches the Drearfort.
  • Where Theon spurns the 'hand up' Dagmer and his splintered jaw could have given him, "Sansa accept[s] a hand up from Lothor Brune" and climbs the "splintered" ladder.
  • Where Theon think of the Cleftjaw, who has a "gut-churning scar", Sansa thinks about her literally churning guts — her upset "tummy".
  • Where Theon thinks that Cleftjaw's "gut-churning scar" resulted from his being "near[ly] killed as a boy", Sansa's churning guts are related to the evident psychic scar she's suffered, which causes her to see a boy killed over and over again.
  • Dagmer's "shattered" teeth and "splintered" jaw (and Dagmar being sent to "Torrhen's Square") → Brune's "squashed nose" and "square jaw"
  • Where Dagmer is ironborn, and had his jaw "cracked… in half", Brune wears a "cracked and water-stained [as if from the sea]" jerkin.
  • Dagmer's "snowy mane of white hair" → Brune's "mat of nappy grey hair"/"nap of woolly grey hair"
  • Despite their 'old hair', Dagmer is "fierce" and "fearsome", Brune "strong".
  • Where Dagmer's smile is "ugly" but nonetheless fills Theon with warm memories (defying its appearance), Brune, who "could not be called comely, but… was not ugly either", is "stronger than he looks".
  • Where Dagmer "covered his cheeks and neck" with a beard but can't grow a 'proper' one due to his scar, which appears as a "seam", Brune doesn't look like a "proper knight" in his "patched… breeches" and "scuffed boots". (Note the sewing language — "seam" → "patched" — and the lexical similarity: "cheeks" → "breeches".)
  • Both men seem to have a penchant for drink (per the implications of Sansa commenting on Brune's nature "when sober") and a foregrounded relationship with singers. (Where Dagmer loves singers and songs, Brune is in conflict with Marillion — although the deeds of "Lothor Apple-Eater" are likely sung of, like Dagmer's exploits.)
Thus just as the Aeron of Theon's homcoming 'rhymes' with the Oswell of Petyr's homecoming, so is Theon's Dagmer Cleftjaw reworked in the person of Petyr's Lothor Brune.
And thus everything about Petyr's homecoming continues to remind us of Theon's homecoming, which makes sense… if Petyr is likewise a scion of ironborn royalty (e.g. if he's Hoare-ish).

The End, and The Distinct Possibility That The Rhyme Between Petyr's and Theon's Homecomings Isn't (Just) About Petyr Being Hoare-ish, After All

That's it. That's all I got regarding the recursively 'rhyming' homecomings of Theon and Petyr. For me, the insane scope and depth of the 'rhyming' between Petyr's homecoming and the homcoming of a scion of ironborn kings is entirely consistent with my broader hypothesis: that the blood of ironborn kings likewise flows in the veins of Petyr Littlefinger — namely "the black blood" of House Hoare of Orkmont.
And yet . . .
It remains that notwithstanding that my Hoare-ish Littlefinger posts connected virtually everything we're told about House Hoare and its various historical kings with things we're told about Petyr Baelish, this (sub)series has detailed recursion not between Petyr and the Hoares, but between Petyr and Theon Greyjoy, who is like the Hoares in that his blood is that of ironborn kings, but who is, nonetheless, a Greyjoy.
It also remains that Theon is the grandson of Quellon Greyjoy, and that [as I show here] — or just scroll down, I'll reproduce that post in the comments — Quellon Greyjoy as described in both TWOIAF and in ASOIAF is nothing if not incredibly Hoare-esque, and not just because his policies and biography in TWOIAF 'rhyme' with the policies and biographies of various Hoare kings, but because ASOIAF proper subtly suggests he was something of a 'whore' in that AFFC makes it abundantly clear that Quellon was a prolific sperm cannon by repeating over and over that he sired nine sons we know of (on three different wives).
Recall that we saw in [Part 2 of the original 'Littlefinger is Hoare-ish' series] that Petyr is in certain striking respects similar to Balon, to Euron, to Aeron, to Asha, and even to Victarion.
This all gives rise to the question: Does all the 'rhyming' between the homecomings of Theon Greyjoy and Petyr Baelish as detailed in this series 'merely' (further) hint that Petyr is (literally) Hoare-ish, and hence that he is like Theon in that he, too, is the scion of ironborn kings?
Or do all the Petyr-Greyjoy connections, coupled with Quellon's foregrounded fecundity and the presence of a barely concealed metaphor for an ocean-based sperm (whale) cannon on Petyr's estate (alongside a reminder of invaders from the sea)—
There was one place where the tide came jetting up out of a blowhole to shoot thirty feet into the air, and another where someone had chiseled the seven-pointed star of the new gods upon a boulder. Petyr said that marked one of the places the Andals had landed, when they came across the sea to wrest the Vale from the First Men.
—hint that at some point during his travels, Quellon Greyjoy bedded Petyr's mother Alayne (or perhaps Petyr's father's mother), cuckolding her husband and impregnating her with Petyr (or Lord Baelish)?
Note that Quellon was a direct, analogous contemporary to Petyr's 'father': Both are said to have fought for the Targaryens in the War of the Ninepenny Kings.

The Mockingbird & The Cuckolding Cowbird

Here we must consider that Petyr's sigil is the mockingbird, and that certain species of mockingbirds (see https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Long-tailed_mockingbird and https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chilean_mockingbird and https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/White-banded_mockingbird and https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Northern_mockingbird and https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chalk-browed_mockingbird) are well-known as hosts for the [brood parasitism] of certain [cowbirds]. That is, it is well-known that mockingbirds frequently care for the eggs of cowbirds and feed the hatched chicks of cowbirds as if they were their own offspring.
In short, mockingbirds accept being cuckolded.
Recall here that the men of Pyke greeted Theon with "bovine [as in cow, as in the cowbirds that cuckold mockingbirds] eyes", and that the o.g. brood parasites are cuckoo birds, from whence we derive our term "cuckolding".
Recall, too, that the Greyjoy banner over Pyke weirdly takes on the appearance of a bird during Theon's homecoming, which I've just spent 10 posts comparing to Petyr's homecoming:
Above the Sea Tower snapped his father's banner. The Myraham was too far off for Theon to see more than the cloth itself, but he knew the device it bore: the golden kraken of House Greyjoy, arms writhing and reaching against a black field. The banner streamed from an iron mast, shivering and twisting as the wind gusted, like a bird struggling to take flight.
Thus the possibility that Petyr's nominal "father" Lord Baelish (or Petyr's nominal paternal "grandfather") was cuckolded by Quellon Greyjoy, the Hoare-esque sperm cannon from the land of cowbird-evoking "bovine eyes", whose sigil is likened to a bird, is right there in his mockingbird sigil.
Indeed, I very much wonder whether we're not told all about the super-pollinator Garth Greenhand in part as a 'rhyming' hint that Quellon Greyjoy was a super-pollinator who spread his "seed" amongst the ladies of what the ironborn call the "green lands".

The Mocking Bird Went Cuckoo

The notion that Petyr's mockingbird sigil may nod to Petyr's supposed father (or supposed paternal grandfather) getting cuckolded by Quellon Greyjoy reminds me of a song brought to my attention by MaxPayload: The Mocking Bird Went Cuckoo was recorded in the 1930s by at least two acts, including the British movie star [Gracie Fields] — the highest paid film actress in the world c. 1937 — and an act called "The Two Gilberts".
[HERE] is a link to the Fields version.
To say the lyrics of the song remind me of Littlefinger's story is if anything an understatement, beginning with the opening image of "a lovesick youth and maiden":
A lovesick youth and maiden (down on the farm)
With hearts so heavy laden (down on the farm)
They held each other's hands and looked into each other's eye
And started to tell each other lies
To say the least, Littlefinger is closely identified with being a lovesick youth and with lying (including about his sexploits with the sisters Tully). And notably, he and Sansa practically begin their relationship by agreeing to lie about her being his daughter. (Sansa's heart is notably 'heavy laden' when this happens upon arrival at Littlefinger's tower — and sheep farm.)
Regarding the "down on the farm" setting, ASOIAF makes regular reference to the bountiful crops and rich farmlands of the Tullys' Riverlands, and we see the courtyards of Riverrun "teem[ing] with… cows, sheep, and chickens" in ACOK Catelyn V.
The song continues with a first kiss "by the cowshed door" (recalling that we're told that Petyr's estate has "a sheepfold"):
He kissed her by the cowshed door
She said "I've not been kissed before"
And the mockingbird went cuckoo and the donkey went hee-haw
Petyr was, of course, Lysa's first kiss, and probably Catelyn's as well, as well as Lysa's first fuck (regarding which, rest assured that the song gets deep into sexual double-entendre soon enough):
[O]ver there, beneath that bower, she and Lysa had played at kissing with Petyr.
She had not thought of that in years. How young they all had been—she no older than Sansa, Lysa younger than Arya, and Petyr younger still, yet eager. The girls had traded him between them, serious and giggling by turns. It came back to her so vividly she could almost feel his sweaty fingers on her shoulders and taste the mint on his breath. There was always mint growing in the godswood, and Petyr had liked to chew it. He had been such a bold little boy, always in trouble. "He tried to put his tongue in my mouth," Catelyn had confessed to her sister afterward, when they were alone. "He did with me too," Lysa had whispered, shy and breathless. "I liked it." (AGOT Catelyn XI)
"Petyr's breath is always fresh … he was the first man I ever kissed, you know." -Lysa (ASOS Sansa VI)
Next we see the maiden tease the eager "lovesick youth", as Cat ostensibly teased Petyr:
He said "My love I'll swear to you"
She said "I'll smack you if you do"
And the mockingbird went cuckoo and the donkey went hee-haw
Nellie Bly, Nellie Bly, said "Oh how you tease me"
"I'm so shy, I'm so shy, when you start to squeeze me"
He said "Come tell me pretty miss"
"Where did you learn to squeeze and kiss"
And the mockingbird went cuckoo and the donkey went hee-haw
I'd heard the name "Nellie Bly" before in the version of Frankie & Johnny recorded by the legendary father of country music, [Jimmie Rodgers], so hearing it again made me look it up. It turns out the name in both songs was borrowed from [a world-famous American journalist]. (Recall that GRRM went to school for journalism.)
The real Nellie Bly first became famous for writing an expose of conditions in a lunatic asylum for women in New York City. Her fame redoubled after she traveled around the world in 1889. She went on to write pulp serial novels and — notably, given Petyr's apparent designs on Sansa — to wed a much older millionaire man named . . . (wait for it) . . . "Seaman".
(Obviously "Seaman" resonates with the idea that Petyr is ironborn, with the sea in his eyes, and with the sperm-whale like "blowhole" on Petyr's lands, which recalls Theon's foregrounded semen from ACOK Theon I. It likewise suggests a reading of the song per which an older "Seaman" is seducing the "Nellie Bly". Could this presage Quellon seducing original Alayne, who I happen to believe has very intrepid genes herself?)
Anyway, back in the song, things take a "dark" turn:
She said "I love the twilight," down on the farm
Said he, "The dark is my light," down on the farm
My original Hoare-ish Littlefinger series highlighted various ways in which Petyr Baelish is Satan/Lucifedemon-coded, so the lovesick boy saying "The dark is my light" absolutely leaps out to me.
Especially because the couplet it's part of smells like it may well have informed a certain infamous exchange:
"Are you the Sword of the Morning now?"
"No. Men call me Darkstar, and I am of the night." (AFFC The Queenmaker)
Consider that the Sword of the Morning wields dawn, which colloquially coincides with (the maiden's preferred) morning "twilight", while we are clearly supposed to suspect that "Darkstar" (who is "of the night" a la the lovesick boy) — who is for some reason "the most dangerous man in Dorne" and who apparently resembles a "Dragonlord" — was sired by Aerys during his 270 visit to Dorne, with Aerys cuckolding, presumably, a man of House Dayne. (AFFC The Princess in the Tower; The Queenmaker) Note the double-entendre of laying pipe here — life-giving, fertilizing pipe, no less:
In 270 AC, during a visit to Sunspear, he told the Princess of Dorne that he would "make the Dornish deserts bloom" by digging a great underground canal beneath the mountains to bring water down from the rainwood. (TWOIAF)
There's a clear symmetry between the notion that Aeyrs cuckolded a Dayne to produce Darkstar and the idea that the noted Aerys-supporter and loyalist Quellon Greyjoy cuckolded a war hero small lord on the Fingers to produce Littlefinger. Doubly so if Littlefinger's mother was (as I have speculated elsewhere) the daughter of Duncan "the Small" Targaryen, Prince of Dragonflies.
If that couplet (in a song that otherwise smells Littlefingerian) reminds us of Darkstar, isn't it curious that the basic structure of Darkstar's implied origin (in the cuckolding of a small lord by a far greater lord) may (also/instead?) apply to Littlefinger's origin?
Back to The Mocking Bird Went Cuckoo. The next line reads like a reference to Lysa's opinion of Petyr:
Said she "You seem to big and brave and mighty strong to me."
Compare with Lysa's very personal opinion of Petyr:
"He may not look as tall or strong as some, but he is worth more than all of them." (ASOS Sansa VI)
The song's next line is wild given Petyr and Lysa's history with moon tea (a tea brewed with certain plants not used in ordinary tea) and especially my conviction that [Petyr dosed Sansa with moon tea] during their voyage on the Merling King so as to make sure she was not pregnant with Tyrion's child:
Said he "Yes, I had onions for my tea."
(By the way, onions in ASOIAF are of course all about Davos. And who do I think Davos is? A possible Hoare-son or Quellon-son, and the Sailor's Wife's sailor, i.e. a sailor who sired a child and abandoned the mother, as, perhaps, Quellon sired Petyr on original-Alayne before leaving her to raise him on the Smallest Finger. Surely coincidence . . . unless this strange, weird old song has been informing George's Song since the mid-1990s.)
The lyrics continue with more Catelyn-esque teasing:
He said "I love you, yes I do"
She said to him "Oh yeah, says you?"
And the mockingbird went cuckoo and the donkey went hee-haw
He said "You're sweet beyond belief!"
Said she "You said it! OK, chief!"
And the mockingbird went cuckoo and the donkey went hee-haw
The lovesick boy is then encouraged to "walk 'round the houses"—
Nellie Bly, Nellie Bly, said "Walk 'round the houses"
—which 'just so happens' to recall rather closely Petyr and Sansa's sight-seeing tour of his lands, when "Petyr walked with her around his holdings", which include not just houses, but a symbolic sperm cannon and a reminder that foreigners sometimes land on these shores:
When the rains let up, Petyr walked with her around his holdings, which took less than half a day. He owned a lot of rocks, just as he had said. There was one place where the tide came jetting up out of a blowhole to shoot thirty feet into the air, and another where someone had chiseled the seven-pointed star of the new gods upon a boulder. Petyr said that marked one of the places the Andals had landed, when they came across the sea to wrest the Vale from the First Men.
Farther inland a dozen families lived in huts of piled stone beside a peat bog.
The song then references farm work and (via double-entendre) sex:
"Just while I, just while I go and milk the cowses"
Milk cows are, of course, linked to wet nursing and babies. And remember: It's cowbirds who make like cuckoos and cuckold mockingbirds.
The double-entendre gradually becomes obvious:
As they sat 'neath the stars above
She says to him "Oh, what is love?
And the mockingbird went hee-haw and the donkey went cuckoo [note the reversal!]
Well she sat there and milked the cow [lol]
"I'll do my bit" said he, "and how!" [lmao]
And the mockingbird went cuckoo and the donkey went hee-haw
He found an old three-legged stool
And sat right down to milk the bull [come on!]
And the mockingbird went cuckoo and the donkey went hee-haw
A milked bull? Quellon's son Victarion is linkened to a bull. Was Victarion's sire "milked" of his "seed" by Alayne Baelish? Did Quellon not only marry a woman of House Stonetree, but bone a woman wed to a man whose sigil was a "stone head"?
Regarding that "three-legged stool", recall that the dragon must have three heads, that a cuckolder turns a partnership into a three-legged affair, so to speak, and that a man with a large penis (see: "Littlefinger"?) is sometimes said to have [a third leg].
From there the song grows only more suspicious as potential inspiration, as it makes explicit reference to concealed paternity, and implicitly to an improper sexual relationship involving a "father" (which see Littlefinger and "Alayne"):
Nellie Bly, Nellie Bly went all in a lather
Began to cry, shouting "Why, that's the cow's father!"
He turned white and looked surprised
Then to the bull apologized
And the mockingbird went cuckoo and the donkey went hee-haw
The closing line about apologizing to the bull resonates with Petyr's dealings with Hoster, and perhaps with cuckoldry as well, as a trespass against patriarchal rights of possession over a woman.
The foregoing represents the seemingly better known Gracie Fields version. [The Two Gilberts version] is mostly the same, save for a few passages in the middle.
Sidebar: Regarding "The Two Gilberts", there 'just so happens' to be exactly two Gilberts in the ASOIAF canon.
One of ASOIAF's two Gilberts 'just so happens' to be one of the legendary scions of legendary sperm cannon and possibly Quellon Greyjoy analogue Garth Greenhand, Gilbert of the Vines, who 'just so happens' to be responsible for all that good Arbor wine Petyr loves so.
The other Gilbert is Gilbert Farring, who Stannis tells us "holds Storm's End for me". (ASOS Davos IV) Repeating that: ASOIAF'S second Gilbert "holds" something that belongs to Stannis in lieu of Stannis holding it himself. Almost like he's cuckolding him.
There are two other Farrings (like Gilbert) in the canon. One is Godry, "the Giantslayer", which sounds like something one might nickname a guy who cuckolded a guy with the Titan of Braavos on his shield. The other is Annara Farring. She was Lord Frey's seventh wife, and guess what she 'just so happens' to be known for? If you said "cuckolding her lordly husband", congratulations. And guess how we're told that? Via, of all things under the sun, a milk cow analogy:
[Black Walder had] had Edwyn's wife too, that was common knowledge, Fair Walda had been known to slip into his bed from time to time, and some even said he'd known the seventh Lady Frey [Annara Farring] a deal better than he should have. Small wonder he refused to marry. Why buy a cow when there were udders all around begging to be milked? (ASOS Epilogue)
(It was at this point that I went from "Maybe George has heard this song" to "George is 100% familiar with this song.")
End Sidebar
Right after the line about the onion tea, The Two Gilberts version sees the lovesick boy promise riches and wealth, recalling Petyr's lifelong interest in making money:
He said "I'll buy you furs and gems"
"And all the pretty thees[?] and thems[?]"
And the mockingbird went cuckoo and the donkey went hee-haw

CONTINUED & CONCLUDED IN OLDEST REPLY, BELOW or HERE

submitted by M_Tootles to asoiaf [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 18:29 M_Tootles The Recursive Homecomings Of Petyr & Theon Part 10 of 10: Oswell & Aeron; Lothar & Dagmer; The Closing Twist (Spoilers TWOW)

This post is the last post in a series looking at the massive amount of 'rhyming' recursivity I believe exists between (a) the homecoming of Petyr Baelish to the Fingers and (b) the homecoming of Theon Greyjoy to Pyke.
While this series/post can be read simply as a study 'for its own sake' of the curious recursion between these storylines, it is my belief that the 'rhyming' explored here between the stories of Petyr and Theon may exist (at least in part) to foreshadow that, like Theon, Petyr Littlefinger, is (among other things) a scion of ironborn kings, because Petyr is Hoare-ish: I.e. because Petyr's blood is (in some part) the blood of the ironborn kings of House Hoare of Orkmont and, later, Harrenhal.
This post is also post 25 of 25 in my broader series on the topic of a Hoare-ish Littlefinger, which is indexed [HERE].
Even if I'm wrong about Littlefinger's lineage, the 'rhyming' recursivity between the homecomings of Theon and Petyr detailed in this series remains, and certainly merits attention.
NOTE: In what follows, all uncited quotes are from ASOS Sansa VI, which describes Petyr's homecoming to his "Drearfort" tower of the 'Smallest Finger', or ACOK Theon I, which describes Theon's homecoming to "drear" Pyke.
As in past posts, I sometimes use "→" as shorthand for "'prefigures' and/or 'informs' and/or 'is reworked by' and/or 'finds a recursive rhyme in'.
As in: ACOK Theon I ASOS Sansa VI.
This post picks up straight-away from where Part 9 left off. You can read Part 9 [HERE].
If you want to begin at the beginning, Part 1 is [HERE].

Aeron & Oswell

After Theon's homecoming chapter opens with Theon thinking "There was no safe anchorage at Pyke", which is copied nearly verbatim during Petyr's homecoming with Sansa, we see Theon anticipating his first glimpse of Pyke castle, and read this sentence:
Theon drew the hood of his cloak up against the spray, and looked for home.
That line proves to be a key part of a pun-tastic 'rhyme' between (a) Theon coming ashore from the Myraham and meeting Aeron and (b) Sansa coming ashore from the Merling King with the aid of Oswell.
I'll explain.
Note first that Oswell, who is…
tall and gangling, with long white hair and a great hooked nose, with eyes shaded by a cowl [like a monk's cowl!]… (ACOK Theon V)
—clearly 'rhymes' with Aeron, an ascetic priest (see Oswell's monk-ish cowl) who is…
Tall and thin, with… a beak of a nose… [and] ropes of dried seaweed were braided through his waist-long black hair and untrimmed beard.
They're set up as yin and yang: Tall and similarly built with notable noses and long hair… but one has "long white hair", the other "long black hair", and Aeron has an "untrimmed beard" while Oswell is clean-shaven.
Aeron's beard is not simply a beard, though, but a beard with seaweed in it, which 'rhymes' with Oswell being not simply clean-shaven, but clean-shaven in a sea-faring way, as his "windburnt face"—
She studied the old man's lined windburnt face, hook nose, white hair, and huge knuckly hands. (ASOS Sansa VI)
—prefigures the "wind-chafed skin" of Aeron's niece Asha, which is tagged as typical of the sea-faring ironborn—
Ironborn, he knew at a glance; lean and long-legged, with… wind-chafed skin, strong sure hands….
—as are her notably "strong sure hands", which similarly 'rhyme' with Oswell's notably "huge knuckly hands".
SIDEBAR: As for Aeron's robes here being "green and grey" ("and blue"), this underlines that Petyr's oft-mentioned "grey-green" eyes are like the sea, which (as I've mentioned in previous posts) suggests per Archmaester Haereg's maxim—
"You may dress an ironman in silks and velvets, teach him to read and write and give him books, instruct him in chivalry and courtesy and the mysteries of the Faith… but when you look into his eyes, the sea will still be there, cold and grey and cruel." (TWOIAF)
—that Littlefinger is, at least in part, an ironman.
END SIDEBAR
The first thing we're told about Aeron after Theon realizes who he is is that "he washed up safe on shore"—
A memory prodded at Theon. In one of his rare curt letters, Lord Balon had written of his youngest brother going down in a storm, and turning holy when he washed up safe on shore. "Uncle Aeron?" he said doubtfully.
—which prefigures Oswell splashing his way ashore at the Smallest Finger:
Oswell and Lothor splashed their way ashore, as did Littlefinger himself.
(If Oswell is Aeron-ish, surely Petyr making like Oswell and splashing about in the surf here could foreshadow that he is Hoare-ish. And perhaps some kind of religious figure as well.)

Drawn Up Hoods

With that Oswell/Aeron 'rhyme' in mind, consider again that, as Theon approaches castle Pyke on the Myraham
Theon drew the hood of his cloak up against the spray, and looked for home.
Sound familiar? That's because it's reworked when Sansa is rowed ashore by the "gangling", Aeron-esque Oswell:
Lothor and old Oswell rowed them ashore. Sansa huddled in the bow under her cloak with the hood drawn up against the wind….
When Sansa gets to shore, "two old men" help to make sure she doesn't get even a little bit wet—
The two old men waded out up to their thighs to lift Sansa from the boat so she would not get her skirts wet.
—which was, of course, exactly the thing Theon was trying to avoid back in ACOK when he "drew the hood of his cloak up against the spray", as Sansa drew hers "up against the wind" when Oswell rowed her in.

Gangplank → Gangling.

GRRM is just warming up. When Theon reaches Lordsport and disembarks from the Myraham, he, too, avoids getting wet. At least initially. Where Sansa uses "gangling" Oswell to come ashore, Theon uses… a "gangplank":
Without waiting for a reply [from Myraham's captain], he strode down the gangplank. "Innkeeper," he barked. "I require a horse".

Kneeling Servants

The innkeeper never gets Theon his horse, of course (of course), because Aeron shows up. And what does gangling white-haired Oswell's black-haired physical mirror Aeron do? He makes Theon get wet after all.
"Kneel."
The ground was all stones[!] and mud. "Uncle, I—"
"Kneel. Or are you too proud now, a lordling of the green lands come among us?"
Theon knelt. He had a purpose here, and might need Aeron's help to achieve it. A crown was worth a little mud and horseshit on his breeches, he supposed.
"Bow your head." Lifting the skin, his uncle pulled the cork and directed a thin stream of seawater down upon Theon's head. It drenched his hair and ran over his forehead into his eyes. Sheets washed down his cheeks, and a finger crept under his cloak and doublet and down his back, a cold rivulet along his spine. The salt made his eyes burn, until it was all he could do not to cry out. He could taste the ocean on his lips. "Let Theon your servant be born again from the sea, as you were," Aeron Greyjoy intoned. "Bless him with salt, bless him with stone, bless him with steel."
Note that Theon kneeling on "stones and mud… and horseshit" before a priest with "seaweed" in his beard is reworked even as Oswell rows Sansa ashore and she huddles in her cloak like Theon, when the Baelish household kneels on rocks covered by nasty seaweed and Sansa dodges sheepshit:
Lothor and old Oswell rowed them ashore. Sansa huddled in the bow under her cloak with the hood drawn up against the wind, wondering what awaited her. Servants emerged from the tower to meet them…. When they recognized Lord Petyr they knelt on the rocks.
[Petyr] led them up the strand over rocks slick with rotting seaweed. … Sansa had to step carefully; there were pellets [i.e. sheepshit] everywhere.

Blessings

Meanwhile, Aeron giving Theon his holy "bless[ing]" is reworked just before Sansa is rowed ashore, when Petyr asks for Sansa's "blessing" after he tells her they're not going to Winterfell and that he's going to wed Lysa:
"So silent, my lady?" said Petyr. "I was certain you would wish to give me your blessing. …"
"I . . . I pray you will have long years together, and many children, and be very happy in one another.
Sansa's reluctant acquiescence — both to giving the blessing and to going ashore and going along with Petyr's plan, which she had not anticipated — echoes Theon's reluctant acquiescence to both Aeron's blessing and Balon's plan of invasion, which he hadn't anticipated.
I suspect Littefinger was fed the line, "So silent, my lady?" before asking for Sansa's blessing as a nod to several pertinent silences in ACOK Theon I. First, the "sullen silence" of the Myraham's captain when he reluctantly acquiesces to Theon taking his would-be salt wife daughter below deck to get a blowjob; second, the "gloom of silence" between Theon and Aeron as they make the final approach to Pyke, post-blessing; and finally, Theon marking the absence of Euron's 'lady', Silence, as he sails into Lordsport:
Theon searched for his uncle Euron's Silence.
Truly, all things come round again.

Getting Wet & Staying Dry 1

But what about Aeron getting Theon pointedly wet? Aeron not only making Theon kneel but getting him wet and then riding with him to Pyke, is reworked (and reversed) not just by Oswell and Lothor rowing Sansa ashore — note the "rode" → "rowed" wordplay:
They [Aeron and Theon] rode in a gloom of silence.
Lothor and old Oswell rowed them ashore.
— and not just by Sansa being carried ashore and kept pointedly dry by two old men who were, seconds earlier, kneeling reverently on the seashore, but also by Aeron-ish Oswell helping Sansa "up" onto The Merling King from his rowboat while assuring her he won't let her fall into the sea, which he makes sure she doesn't:
The rower shipped the oars and helped Sansa to her feet. "Up now. Go on, girl, I got you." Sansa thanked him for his kindness, but received no answer but a grunt. It was much easier going up the rope ladder than it had been coming down the cliff. The oarsman Oswell followed close behind her(ASOS Sansa V)
So: Where Oswell-ish Aeron forces Theon to kneel and then wets him down with seawater, ceremonially "drowning" him after he comes down the "gangplank", the "gangling" Aeron-ish Oswell helps Sansa "to her feet" and then "up" while promising not to let her fall in the sea, where she could drown.

Getting Wet & Staying Dry 2

Aeron forcing Theon to kneel and getting him wet before he "rode" with him to Pyke is also reworked/reversed inside Petyr's tower, when Sansa's 'other' rower Lothor protects Sansa from Marillion's rape attempt— from being (like Theon) forced to get "wet", so to speak:
"My blood is stirred. And yours, I know … there's no wench half so lusty as one bastard born. Are you wet for me?"
"I'm a maiden," she protested.
"Truly? Oh, Alayne, Alayne, my fair maid, give me the gift of your innocence.
The wetness motif is played up again:
"He put a hand on her breast, and squeezed. "Let's get you out of these wet clothes. You wouldn't want them ripped, I know. Come, sweet lady, heed your heart—"
He wants to "get [her] out of [her] wet clothes" so he can get her "wet", so to speak. But where Aeron forced Theon to "kneel" and get wet in language that suddenly reads as quite rapey and spine-chilling—
Sheets washed down his cheeks [which cheeks?], and a finger[!] crept under his cloak and doublet and down his back, a cold rivulet along his spine."
—before he "rode" with him to castle Pyke, Lothor Brune, who "rowed" Sansa ashore, keeps her safe and 'dry':
Sansa heard the soft sound of steel on leather. "Singer," a rough voice said, "best go, if you want to sing again." The light was dim, but she saw a faint glimmer of a blade.
The singer saw it too. "Find your own wench—" The knife flashed, and he cried out. "You cut me!"
"I'll do worse, if you don't go."
And quick as that, Marillion was gone. The other remained, looming over Sansa in the darkness. "Lord Petyr said watch out for you." It was Lothor Brune's voice, she realized.

Dagmer Cleftjaw → Lothor Brune

And what do you know? Oswell's rowing partner Lothor Brune is also prefigured by Theon's homecoming. Not by Aeron, but by Dagmer Cleftjaw, who Theon thinks of as he approaches Lordsport on the Myraham. In fact, there's a huge 'rhyme' between (a) Dagmer Cleftjaw and his "gut-churning scar", on the one hand, and (b) the beginning of ASOS Sansa VI, which describes Lothor Brune and Sansa's upset stomach (i.e. her churning guts) and seemingly permanently scarred psyche, on the other. I'll try to lay out now.
Consider first that as Theon approaches Lordsport on the Myraham, he goes below deck, where he thinks about Dagmer Cleftjaw (along with the sour-like-Aeron Sylas Sourmouth, who was discussed in Part 8):
As the Myraham made her way landward, Theon paced the deck restlessly, scanning the shore. He had not thought to find Lord Balon himself at quayside, but surely his father would have sent someone to meet him. Sylas Sourmouth the steward, Lord Botley, perhaps even Dagmer Cleftjaw. It would be good to look on Dagmer's hideous old face again.
We meet Dagmer in ACOK Theon III,
He smiled himself to show how it was done. It made for a hideous sight. Under a snowy white mane of hair, Dagmer Cleftjaw had the most gut-churning scar Theon had ever seen, the legacy of the longaxe that had near killed him as a boy. The blow had splintered his jaw, shattered his front teeth, and left him four lips where other men had but two. A shaggy beard covered his cheeks and neck, but the hair would not grow over the scar, so a shiny seam of puckered, twisted flesh divided his face like a crevasse through a snowfield "We could hear them singing," the old warrior said. "It was a good song, and they sang it bravely."
Dagmer grinned more often and more broadly than Lord Balon ever had.
Ugly as it was, that smile brought back a hundred memories. Theon had seen it often as a boy, when he'd jumped a horse over a mossy wall, or flung an axe and split a target square. [More fond memories of Dagmer.]
We later learn that Dagmer is "fearsome" and a "fierce fighter" as well, despite being marked as aged by his "white mane of hair". (ADWD The King's Prize)
Dagmer's ship is named Foamdrinker, a double-entendre about ale-drinking, as he likes drinking, as well as reaving songs — especially the one a singer wrote about him:
He knew that would give Dagmer pause. A singer had made a song about the axe that cracked his jaw in half, and the old man loved to hear it. Whenever he was in his cups he would call for a reaving song, something loud and stormy that told of dead heroes and deeds of wild valor. (ACOK Theon III)
Balon puts Dagmer in Theon's reaving detachment. Theon foolishly resents this, not accepting that he is inexperienced and needs and could benefit enormously from a seasoned number two with whom he has a good relationship:
"You are to harry the Stony Shore, raiding the fishing villages and sinking any ships you chance to meet. … Aeron will accompany you, and Dagmer Cleftjaw."
…Theon felt as if he'd been slapped. He was being sent to do reaver's work, burning fishermen out of their hovels and raping their ugly daughters, and yet it seemed Lord Balon did not trust him sufficiently to do even that much. Bad enough to have to suffer the Damphair's scowls and chidings. With Dagmer Cleftjaw along as well, his command would be purely nominal. (ACOK Theon II)
Balon gives Theon Dagmer to help him, but Theon can only see it as an affront, so he tries to sideline him:
Dagmer Cleftjaw stood by the high carved prow of his longship, Foamdrinker. Theon had assigned him the task of guarding the ships; otherwise men would have called it Dagmer's victory, not his. A more prickly man might have taken that for a slight, but the Cleftjaw had only laughed. (ACOK Theon III)

That Splintery Ladder Again & Lothor's Hand Up

Now, remembering that we're introduced to Dagmer Cleftjaw while Theon is still aship en route to Pyke, consider again the first paragraph of Sansa VI, plus a bit more (which of course takes place while Petyr and Sansa are still aship en route to Petyr's Drearfort):
The ladder to the forecastle was steep and splintery, so Sansa accepted a hand up from Lothor Brune. Ser Lothor, she had to remind herself; the man had been knighted for his valor in the Battle of the Blackwater. Though no proper knight would wear those patched brown breeches and scuffed boots, nor that cracked and water-stained leather jerkin. A square-faced stocky man with a squashed nose and a mat of nappy grey hair, Brune spoke seldom. He is stronger than he looks, though. She could tell by the ease with which he lifted her, as if she weighed nothing at all. …
She had seldom ventured out on deck herself. Her little cabin was dank and cold, but Sansa had been sick for most of the voyage . . . sick with terror, sick with fever, or seasick . . . she could keep nothing down, and even sleep came hard. Whenever she closed her eyes she saw Joffrey… dying….
…Even this close to shore, the rolling of the ship made her tummy queasy.…
[Petyr] put a sympathetic arm about her shoulders. "Are you quite well? You look so pale."
"It's only my tummy. The seasickness."
We're subsequently reminded of Brune's "squashed nose" and "mat of nappy grey hair", and told of his "square jaw" and more:
With his squashed nose, square jaw, and nap of woolly grey hair, Brune could not be called comely, but he was not ugly either. … Sober, he was a quiet man, but a strong one. (AFFC Alayne II)
Recall too that Brune saves Sansa from Marillion, who tries to use her as Theon used the captain's daughter.
Having surveyed the field of (word)play, we can now see the 'rhyming':
  • Where Theon goes below deck as he approaches Lordsport and thinks about Dagmer, whose jaw is (verbatim) "splintered", Sansa, with Brune's help, climbs up to the deck using a (verbatim) "splintered" ladder as she approaches the Drearfort.
  • Where Theon spurns the 'hand up' Dagmer and his splintered jaw could have given him, "Sansa accept[s] a hand up from Lothor Brune" and climbs the "splintered" ladder.
  • Where Theon think of the Cleftjaw, who has a "gut-churning scar", Sansa thinks about her literally churning guts — her upset "tummy".
  • Where Theon thinks that Cleftjaw's "gut-churning scar" resulted from his being "near[ly] killed as a boy", Sansa's churning guts are related to the evident psychic scar she's suffered, which causes her to see a boy killed over and over again.
  • Dagmer's "shattered" teeth and "splintered" jaw (and Dagmar being sent to "Torrhen's Square") → Brune's "squashed nose" and "square jaw"
  • Where Dagmer is ironborn, and had his jaw "cracked… in half", Brune wears a "cracked and water-stained [as if from the sea]" jerkin.
  • Dagmer's "snowy mane of white hair" → Brune's "mat of nappy grey hair"/"nap of woolly grey hair"
  • Despite their 'old hair', Dagmer is "fierce" and "fearsome", Brune "strong".
  • Where Dagmer's smile is "ugly" but nonetheless fills Theon with warm memories (defying its appearance), Brune, who "could not be called comely, but… was not ugly either", is "stronger than he looks".
  • Where Dagmer "covered his cheeks and neck" with a beard but can't grow a 'proper' one due to his scar, which appears as a "seam", Brune doesn't look like a "proper knight" in his "patched… breeches" and "scuffed boots". (Note the sewing language — "seam" → "patched" — and the lexical similarity: "cheeks" → "breeches".)
  • Both men seem to have a penchant for drink (per the implications of Sansa commenting on Brune's nature "when sober") and a foregrounded relationship with singers. (Where Dagmer loves singers and songs, Brune is in conflict with Marillion — although the deeds of "Lothor Apple-Eater" are likely sung of, like Dagmer's exploits.)
Thus just as the Aeron of Theon's homcoming 'rhymes' with the Oswell of Petyr's homecoming, so is Theon's Dagmer Cleftjaw reworked in the person of Petyr's Lothor Brune.
And thus everything about Petyr's homecoming continues to remind us of Theon's homecoming, which makes sense… if Petyr is likewise a scion of ironborn royalty (e.g. if he's Hoare-ish).

The End, and The Distinct Possibility That The Rhyme Between Petyr's and Theon's Homecomings Isn't (Just) About Petyr Being Hoare-ish, After All

That's it. That's all I got regarding the recursively 'rhyming' homecomings of Theon and Petyr. For me, the insane scope and depth of the 'rhyming' between Petyr's homecoming and the homcoming of a scion of ironborn kings is entirely consistent with my broader hypothesis: that the blood of ironborn kings likewise flows in the veins of Petyr Littlefinger — namely "the black blood" of House Hoare of Orkmont.
And yet . . .
It remains that notwithstanding that my Hoare-ish Littlefinger posts connected virtually everything we're told about House Hoare and its various historical kings with things we're told about Petyr Baelish, this (sub)series has detailed recursion not between Petyr and the Hoares, but between Petyr and Theon Greyjoy, who is like the Hoares in that his blood is that of ironborn kings, but who is, nonetheless, a Greyjoy.
It also remains that Theon is the grandson of Quellon Greyjoy, and that [as I show here] — or just scroll down, I'll reproduce that post in the comments — Quellon Greyjoy as described in both TWOIAF and in ASOIAF is nothing if not incredibly Hoare-esque, and not just because his policies and biography in TWOIAF 'rhyme' with the policies and biographies of various Hoare kings, but because ASOIAF proper subtly suggests he was something of a 'whore' in that AFFC makes it abundantly clear that Quellon was a prolific sperm cannon by repeating over and over that he sired nine sons we know of (on three different wives).
Recall, too, that we saw in [Part 2 of the original 'Littlefinger is Hoare-ish' series] that Petyr is in certain striking respects similar to Balon, to Euron, to Aeron, to Asha, and even to Victarion.
This all gives rise to the question: Does all the 'rhyming' between the homecomings of Theon Greyjoy and Petyr Baelish as detailed in this series 'merely' (further) hint that Petyr is (literally) Hoare-ish, and hence that he is like Theon in that he, too, is the scion of ironborn kings?
Or do all the Petyr-Greyjoy connections, coupled with Quellon's foregrounded fecundity and the presence of a barely concealed metaphor for an ocean-based sperm (whale) cannon on Petyr's estate (alongside a reminder of invaders from the sea)—
There was one place where the tide came jetting up out of a blowhole to shoot thirty feet into the air, and another where someone had chiseled the seven-pointed star of the new gods upon a boulder. Petyr said that marked one of the places the Andals had landed, when they came across the sea to wrest the Vale from the First Men.
—hint that at some point during his travels, Quellon Greyjoy bedded Petyr's mother Alayne (or perhaps Petyr's father's mother), cuckolding her husband and impregnating her with Petyr (or Lord Baelish)?
Note that Quellon was a direct, analogous contemporary to Petyr's 'father': Both are said to have fought for the Targaryens in the War of the Ninepenny Kings.

The Mockingbird & The Cuckolding Cowbird

Here we must consider that Petyr's sigil is the mockingbird, and that certain species of mockingbirds (see https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Long-tailed_mockingbird and https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chilean_mockingbird and https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/White-banded_mockingbird and https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Northern_mockingbird and https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chalk-browed_mockingbird) are well-known as hosts for the [brood parasitism] of certain [cowbirds]. That is, it is well-known that mockingbirds frequently care for the eggs of cowbirds and feed the hatched chicks of cowbirds as if they were their own offspring.
In short, mockingbirds accept being cuckolded.
Recall here that the men of Pyke greeted Theon with "bovine [as in cow, as in the cowbirds that cuckold mockingbirds] eyes", and that the o.g. brood parasites are cuckoo birds, from whence we derive our term "cuckolding".
Recall, too, that the Greyjoy banner over Pyke weirdly takes on the appearance of a bird during Theon's homecoming, which I've just spent 10 posts comparing to Petyr's homecoming:
Above the Sea Tower snapped his father's banner. The Myraham was too far off for Theon to see more than the cloth itself, but he knew the device it bore: the golden kraken of House Greyjoy, arms writhing and reaching against a black field. The banner streamed from an iron mast, shivering and twisting as the wind gusted, like a bird struggling to take flight.
Thus the possibility that Petyr's nominal "father" Lord Baelish (or Petyr's nominal paternal "grandfather") was cuckolded by Quellon Greyjoy, the Hoare-esque sperm cannon from the land of cowbird-evoking "bovine eyes", whose sigil is likened to a bird, is right there in his mockingbird sigil.
Indeed, I very much wonder whether we're not told all about the super-pollinator Garth Greenhand in part as a 'rhyming' hint that Quellon Greyjoy was a super-pollinator who spread his "seed" amongst the ladies of what the ironborn call the "green lands".

The Mocking Bird Went Cuckoo

The notion that Petyr's mockingbird sigil may nod to Petyr's supposed father (or supposed paternal grandfather) getting cuckolded by Quellon Greyjoy reminds me of a song brought to my attention by MaxPayload: The Mocking Bird Went Cuckoo was recorded in the 1930s by at least two acts, including the British movie star [Gracie Fields] — the highest paid film actress in the world c. 1937 — and an act called "The Two Gilberts".
To say the lyrics of the song remind me of Littlefinger's story is if anything an understatement, beginning with the opening image of "a lovesick youth and maiden":
A lovesick youth and maiden (down on the farm)
With hearts so heavy laden (down on the farm)
They held each other's hands and looked into each other's eye
And started to tell each other lies
To say the least, Littlefinger is closely identified with being a lovesick youth and with lying (including about his sexploits with the sisters Tully). And notably, he and Sansa practically begin their relationship by agreeing to lie about her being his daughter. (Sansa's heart is notably 'heavy laden' when this happens upon arrival at Littlefinger's tower — and sheep farm.)
Regarding the "down on the farm" setting, ASOIAF makes regular reference to the bountiful crops and rich farmlands of the Tullys' Riverlands, and we see the courtyards of Riverrun "teem[ing] with… cows, sheep, and chickens" in ACOK Catelyn V.
The song continues with a first kiss "by the cowshed door" (recalling that we're told that Petyr's estate has "a sheepfold"):
He kissed her by the cowshed door
She said "I've not been kissed before"
And the mockingbird went cuckoo and the donkey went hee-haw
Petyr was, of course, Lysa's first kiss, and probably Catelyn's as well, as well as Lysa's first fuck (regarding which, rest assured that the song gets deep into sexual double-entendre soon enough):
[O]ver there, beneath that bower, she and Lysa had played at kissing with Petyr.
She had not thought of that in years. How young they all had been—she no older than Sansa, Lysa younger than Arya, and Petyr younger still, yet eager. The girls had traded him between them, serious and giggling by turns. It came back to her so vividly she could almost feel his sweaty fingers on her shoulders and taste the mint on his breath. There was always mint growing in the godswood, and Petyr had liked to chew it. He had been such a bold little boy, always in trouble. "He tried to put his tongue in my mouth," Catelyn had confessed to her sister afterward, when they were alone. "He did with me too," Lysa had whispered, shy and breathless. "I liked it." (AGOT Catelyn XI)
"Petyr's breath is always fresh … he was the first man I ever kissed, you know." -Lysa (ASOS Sansa VI)
Next we see the maiden tease the eager "lovesick youth", as Cat ostensibly teased Petyr:
He said "My love I'll swear to you"
She said "I'll smack you if you do"
And the mockingbird went cuckoo and the donkey went hee-haw
Nellie Bly, Nellie Bly, said "Oh how you tease me"
"I'm so shy, I'm so shy, when you start to squeeze me"
He said "Come tell me pretty miss"
"Where did you learn to squeeze and kiss"
And the mockingbird went cuckoo and the donkey went hee-haw
I'd heard the name "Nellie Bly" before in the version of Frankie & Johnny recorded by the legendary father of country music, [Jimmie Rodgers], so hearing it again made me look it up. It turns out the name in both songs was borrowed from [a world-famous American journalist]. (Recall that GRRM went to school for journalism.)
The real Nellie Bly first became famous for writing an expose of conditions in a lunatic asylum for women in New York City. Her fame redoubled after she traveled around the world in 1889. She went on to write pulp serial novels and — notably, given Petyr's apparent designs on Sansa — to wed a much older millionaire man named . . . (wait for it) . . . "Seaman".
(Obviously "Seaman" resonates with the idea that Petyr is ironborn, with the sea in his eyes, and with the sperm-whale like "blowhole" on Petyr's lands, which recalls Theon's foregrounded semen from ACOK Theon I. It likewise suggests a reading of the song per which an older "Seaman" is seducing the "Nellie Bly". Could this presage Quellon seducing original-Alayne, who I happen to believe has very intrepid genes herself?)
Anyway, back in the song, things take a "dark" turn:
She said "I love the twilight," down on the farm
Said he, "The dark is my light," down on the farm
My original Hoare-ish Littlefinger series highlighted various ways in which Petyr Baelish is Satan/Lucifedemon-coded, so the lovesick boy saying "The dark is my light" absolutely leaps out to me.
Especially because the couplet it's part of smells like it may well have informed a certain infamous exchange:
"Are you the Sword of the Morning now?"
"No. Men call me Darkstar, and I am of the night." (AFFC The Queenmaker)
Consider that the Sword of the Morning wields dawn, which colloquially coincides with (the maiden's preferred) morning "twilight", while we are clearly supposed to suspect that "Darkstar" (who is "of the night" a la the lovesick boy) — who is for some reason "the most dangerous man in Dorne" and who apparently resembles a "Dragonlord" — was sired by Aerys during his 270 visit to Dorne, with Aerys cuckolding, presumably, a man of House Dayne. (AFFC The Princess in the Tower; The Queenmaker) Note the double-entendre of laying pipe here — life-giving, fertilizing pipe, no less:
In 270 AC, during a visit to Sunspear, he told the Princess of Dorne that he would "make the Dornish deserts bloom" by digging a great underground canal beneath the mountains to bring water down from the rainwood. (TWOIAF)
There's a clear symmetry between the notion that Aeyrs cuckolded a Dayne to produce Darkstar and the idea that the noted Aerys-supporter and loyalist Quellon Greyjoy cuckolded a war hero small lord on the Fingers to produce Littlefinger. Doubly so if Littlefinger's mother was (as I have speculated elsewhere) the daughter of Duncan "the Small" Targaryen, Prince of Dragonflies.
If that couplet (in a song that otherwise smells Littlefingerian) reminds us of Darkstar, isn't it curious that the basic structure of Darkstar's implied origin (in the cuckolding of a small lord by a far greater lord) may (also/instead?) apply to Littlefinger's origin?
Back to The Mocking Bird Went Cuckoo. The next line reads like a reference to Lysa's opinion of Petyr:
Said she "You seem to big and brave and mighty strong to me."
Compare with Lysa's very personal opinion of Petyr:
"He may not look as tall or strong as some, but he is worth more than all of them." (ASOS Sansa VI)
The song's next line is wild given Petyr and Lysa's history with moon tea (a tea brewed with certain plants not used in ordinary tea) and especially my conviction that [Petyr dosed Sansa with moon tea] during their voyage on the Merling King so as to make sure she was not pregnant with Tyrion's child:
Said he "Yes, I had onions for my tea."
(By the way, onions in ASOIAF are of course all about Davos. And who do I think Davos is? A possible Hoare-son or Quellon-son, and the Sailor's Wife's sailor, i.e. a sailor who sired a child and abandoned the mother, as, perhaps, Quellon sired Petyr on Alayne before leaving her to raise him on the Smallest Finger. Surely coincidence . . . unless this strange, weird old song has been informing George's Song since the mid-1990s.)
The lyrics continue with more Catelyn-esque teasing:
He said "I love you, yes I do"
She said to him "Oh yeah, says you?"
And the mockingbird went cuckoo and the donkey went hee-haw
He said "You're sweet beyond belief!"
Said she "You said it! OK, chief!"
And the mockingbird went cuckoo and the donkey went hee-haw
The lovesick boy is then encouraged to "walk 'round the houses"—
Nellie Bly, Nellie Bly, said "Walk 'round the houses"
—which 'just so happens' to recall rather closely Petyr and Sansa's sight-seeing tour of his lands, when "Petyr walked with her around his holdings", which include not just houses, but a symbolic sperm cannon and a reminder that foreigners sometimes land on these shores:
When the rains let up, Petyr walked with her around his holdings, which took less than half a day. He owned a lot of rocks, just as he had said. There was one place where the tide came jetting up out of a blowhole to shoot thirty feet into the air, and another where someone had chiseled the seven-pointed star of the new gods upon a boulder. Petyr said that marked one of the places the Andals had landed, when they came across the sea to wrest the Vale from the First Men.
Farther inland a dozen families lived in huts of piled stone beside a peat bog.
The song then references farm work and (via double-entendre) sex:
"Just while I, just while I go and milk the cowses"
Milk cows are, of course, linked to wet nursing and babies. And remember: It's cowbirds who make like cuckoos and cuckold mockingbirds.
The double-entendre gradually becomes obvious:
As they sat 'neath the stars above
She says to him "Oh, what is love?
And the mockingbird went hee-haw and the donkey went cuckoo [note the reversal!]
Well she sat there and milked the cow [lol]
"I'll do my bit" said he, "and how!" [lmao]
And the mockingbird went cuckoo and the donkey went hee-haw
He found an old three-legged stool
And sat right down to milk the bull [come on!]
And the mockingbird went cuckoo and the donkey went hee-haw
A milked bull? Quellon's son Victarion is linkened to a bull. Was Victarion's sire "milked" of his "seed" by Alayne Baelish? Did Quellon not only marry a woman of House Stonetree, but bone a woman wed to a man whose sigil was a "stone head"?
Regarding that "three-legged stool", recall that the dragon must have three heads, that a cuckolder turns a partnership into a three-legged affair, so to speak, and that a man with a large penis (see: "Littlefinger"?) is sometimes said to have [a third leg].
From there the song grows only more suspicious as potential inspiration, as it makes explicit reference to concealed paternity, and implicitly to an improper sexual relationship involving a "father" (which see Littlefinger and "Alayne"):
Nellie Bly, Nellie Bly went all in a lather
Began to cry, shouting "Why, that's the cow's father!"
He turned white and looked surprised
Then to the bull apologized
And the mockingbird went cuckoo and the donkey went hee-haw
The closing line about apologizing to the bull resonates with Petyr's dealings with Hoster, and perhaps with cuckoldry as well, as a trespass against patriarchal rights of possession over a woman.
The foregoing represents the seemingly better known Gracie Fields version. The Two Gilberts version is mostly the same, save for a few passages in the middle.
Sidebar: Regarding "The Two Gilberts", there 'just so happens' to be exactly two Gilberts in the ASOIAF canon.
One of ASOIAF's two Gilberts 'just so happens' to be one of the legendary scions of legendary sperm cannon and possibly Quellon Greyjoy analogue Garth Greenhand, Gilbert of the Vines, who 'just so happens' to be responsible for all that good Arbor wine Petyr loves so.
The other Gilbert is Gilbert Farring, who Stannis tells us "holds Storm's End for me". (ASOS Davos IV) Repeating that: ASOIAF'S second Gilbert "holds" something that belongs to Stannis in lieu of Stannis holding it himself. Almost like he's cuckolding him.
There are two other Farrings (like Gilbert) in the canon. One is Godry, "the Giantslayer", which sounds like something one might nickname a guy who cuckolded a guy with the Titan of Braavos on his shield. The other is Annara Farring. She was Lord Frey's seventh wife, and guess what she 'just so happens' to be known for? If you said "cuckolding her lordly husband", congratulations. And guess how we're told that? Via, of all things under the sun, a milk cow analogy:
[Black Walder had] had Edwyn's wife too, that was common knowledge, Fair Walda had been known to slip into his bed from time to time, and some even said he'd known the seventh Lady Frey [Annara Farring] a deal better than he should have. Small wonder he refused to marry. Why buy a cow when there were udders all around begging to be milked? (ASOS Epilogue)
(It was at this point that I went from "Maybe George has heard this song" to "George is 100% familiar with this song.")
End Sidebar
Right after the line about the onion tea, The Two Gilberts version sees the lovesick boy promise riches and wealth, recalling Petyr's lifelong interest in making money:
He said "I'll buy you furs and gems"
"And all the pretty thees[?] and thems[?]"
And the mockingbird went cuckoo and the donkey went hee-haw

CONTINUED & CONCLUDED IN OLDEST REPLY, BELOW or HERE

submitted by M_Tootles to pureasoiaf [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 16:34 Regular-Muscle4532 Damn chicken

Got an S&D yesterday that had no tip, but I was getting nothing all day (got a gang that's getting everything right now) and what I did get was stragglers with no tip. Anyway, there was an order for a family-sized pack of chicken breasts. There were none available. Matter of fact there was only thighs, legs & thin-sliced chicken. Yes, I asked, and was told they were expecting shipment later in the day. So I got the thin-sliced. The app would only let me pick one pack, which wasn't near what was ordered in size.
A minute later I got an all caps chat saying "DONT GET ME CHICKEN TENDERS! GET ME WHAT I WANT! BIG PLUMP JUICY BREASTS!"
I wrote back, "I'm sorry but they are out of the big plump breasts right now. You have the right to decline the substitution".
A few minutes later, as I was finishing the shop, I got another chat. "FROZEN?"
ME: "The chicken? No its not frozen"
Them: "I HIT THE WRONG BUTTON. ILL TAKE FROZEN!"
I checked and sure enough they had approved the sub which means you can no longer change it so I wrote back: "I'm sorry that happened, but the app doesn't let me make a change once the sub has been approved."
Today my 4.9 customer rating dropped to 4.8 for the first time in 6 months. Math says it was due to one 1-star rating. Given I've had no other negative experiences in a LONG LONG time, I can guarantee it was this bitchy, demanding no-tipper. Should have just cancelled the whole thing saying I had an emergency. Lesson learned. 🤬🤬🤬
submitted by Regular-Muscle4532 to Sparkdriver [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 15:27 Coranthius If this isn't a troll post..

If this isn't a troll post.. submitted by Coranthius to untrustworthypoptarts [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 14:01 EcoLogicCrusader Exquisite Fusion Ramen

Ramen, a beloved and quintessential part of Japanese cuisine, has gained international acclaim for its comforting and savory flavors. I’ve always been a fan of traditional Japanese dishes and have since done my best to recreate them as authentically as I can. However, that doesn’t stop me from looking for ways to infuse creativity into my cooking. What has fascinated me about Japanese cooking is the variety of ingredients used that are meant to infuse the umami flavor into their dishes. Which brings me to this recipe I’m sharing. It’s not the most original or innovative, but it has since been a beloved comfort food for me. It’s my ramen recipe that combines traditional Japanese elements with a fusion twist. Here’s the recipe:
Ingredients:
Instructions:
Prepare the broth:
  1. In a large pot, heat the sesame oil over medium heat. Add the minced garlic and grated ginger, sautéing for a minute until fragrant.
  2. Pour in the chicken or vegetable broth, soy sauce, miso paste, and chili paste (if desired). Stir well to combine the flavors.
  3. Bring the broth to a gentle simmer and let it cook for about 15 minutes to allow the flavors to meld together.
Cook the noodles:
  1. While the broth is simmering, cook the ramen noodles according to the package instructions. Drain and set aside.
Prepare the toppings:
  1. In a separate pan, sauté the sliced mushrooms and carrots over medium heat until they begin to soften.
  2. Add the baby bok choy and continue cooking for a few more minutes until the vegetables are tender.
Assemble the ramen:
  1. Divide the cooked noodles into serving bowls. Ladle the hot broth over the noodles, making sure to cover them entirely.
  2. Arrange the cooked chicken or tofu on top of the noodles.
  3. Place the sautéed vegetables on one side of the bowl.
  4. Cut the soft-boiled eggs in half and add them to the other side of the bowl.
  5. Garnish with sliced green onions and a sprinkle of sesame seeds.
Serve and enjoy!
Your Fusion Ramen is now ready to be savored. Serve it piping hot and invite your guests to mix the ingredients together, allowing the flavors to blend harmoniously. The combination of umami-rich broth, tender noodles, succulent chicken or tofu, and vibrant vegetables will create a symphony of tastes that will leave your taste buds dancing. Happy cooking!
submitted by EcoLogicCrusader to japanesecooking [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 05:53 TunaMan92 I'm bringing it back. BONELESS GANG RISE UP!

I'm bringing it back. BONELESS GANG RISE UP!
In all seriousness, what kind of a selling point is a boneless burger? That's like saying a fizzy soda
submitted by TunaMan92 to TrashTaste [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 05:36 KevinRoamsWild ChatGPT Recipe Tomato-Braised Chicken and Vegetable Pasta

ChatGPT Recipe Tomato-Braised Chicken and Vegetable Pasta
Ingredients: * 3.25 pounds (1.5 kg) of boneless, skinless chicken breasts * 8 ounces (225 grams) of thin spaghetti * 2 cans (14.5 ounces or 411 grams each) of diced tomatoes * 2 cans (8 ounces or 227 grams each) of tomato sauce * 2 cans (14.5 ounces or 411 grams each) of crushed tomatoes * 30 fresh cherry tomatoes * 3 tablespoons (45 milliliters) of olive oil * 1 medium-sized yellow onion, chopped * 3 cloves of garlic, minced * 1 cup (150 grams) of frozen peas * 1 zucchini, sliced * 1 squash, sliced * Salt and pepper to taste * Optional: additional seasonings such as 2 teaspoons of Italian herbs, 1 teaspoon of red pepper flakes, or grated Parmesan cheese
Instructions: 1. Cook the thin spaghetti according to the package instructions. Drain and set aside. 2. While the spaghetti is cooking, heat 2 tablespoons of olive oil in a large skillet over medium heat. Add the chopped onion and minced garlic. Sauté until the onion becomes translucent and the garlic is fragrant. 3. Cut the boneless, skinless chicken breasts into bite-sized pieces. Add the chicken to the skillet and cook until it's no longer pink in the center. 4. Add the diced tomatoes, tomato sauce, and crushed tomatoes to the skillet with the chicken. Stir to combine. If desired, season with additional herbs such as 2 teaspoons of basil, oregano, or Italian seasoning. Simmer the sauce for about 10 minutes to allow the flavors to meld. 5. In a separate pan, heat the remaining 1 tablespoon of olive oil over medium heat. Add the sliced zucchini and squash. Sauté for a few minutes until they are slightly tender. Add the frozen peas and fresh cherry tomatoes to the pan and cook for an additional 2-3 minutes until the vegetables are cooked but still crisp and the cherry tomatoes start to soften and release their juices. 6. Add the cooked vegetables and cherry tomatoes to the skillet with the chicken and sauce. Stir to combine everything together. Season with salt and pepper to taste. 7. Serve the chicken and vegetable sauce over the cooked thin spaghetti. Optionally, sprinkle grated Parmesan cheese or red pepper flakes on top for added flavor.
Estimated Nutrition facts per serving (serves 4): Calories: Approximately 450-500 calories Total Fat: Approximately 10-15 grams * Saturated Fat: Approximately 2-4 grams * Cholesterol: Approximately 100-120 milligrams * Sodium: Approximately 600-800 milligrams * Total Carbohydrates: Approximately 50-60 grams * Dietary Fiber: Approximately 8-10 grams * Sugars: Approximately 10-12 grams * Protein: Approximately 35-40 grams
Shopping List: 1. Meat and Poultry: * 3.25 pounds (1.5 kg) of boneless, skinless chicken breasts 2. Pasta and Grains: * 8 ounces (225 grams) of thin spaghetti 3. Canned Goods: * 2 cans (14.5 ounces or 411 grams each) of diced tomatoes * 2 cans (8 ounces or 227 grams each) of tomato sauce * 2 cans (14.5 ounces or 411 grams each) of crushed tomatoes 4. Fresh Produce: * 1 medium-sized yellow onion * 3 cloves of garlic * 1 zucchini * 1 squash * 30 fresh cherry tomatoes 5. Condiments and Oils: * Olive oil 6. Frozen: * 1 cup (150 grams) of frozen peas Optional: * Italian herbs (such as basil, oregano, or Italian seasoning) * Red pepper flakes * Grated Parmesan cheese
submitted by KevinRoamsWild to ChatGPT [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 04:12 bike_it Boneless, skin-on (deboned) thighs (sauce: Texas Pete buffalo + Stubbs BBQ + bitter orange juice), brown rice, and veg (saute in chicken pan).

Boneless, skin-on (deboned) thighs (sauce: Texas Pete buffalo + Stubbs BBQ + bitter orange juice), brown rice, and veg (saute in chicken pan). submitted by bike_it to meat [link] [comments]


2023.06.01 23:01 Sven-Ost Thai Style Low Carb Peanut Chicken

Thai Style Low Carb Peanut Chicken
Thai Style Low Carb Peanut Chicken
This makes a total of 4 servings of Thai Style Low Carb Peanut Chicken. Each serving comes out to be 344 Calories, 19.5g Fats, 3.9g Net Carbs, and 36g Protein.
The Preparation • 6 medium boneless, skinless chicken thighs (~25 oz.) • 6 tbsp. peanut butter, smooth (unsweetened) • 1/4 cup chicken stock • 2 tbsp. soy sauce • 1 tbsp. orange juice • 1 tbsp. lemon juice • 1/2 tsp. sesame oil • 2 tsp. chili paste • 1/4 tsp. coriander • 1/4 tsp. cayenne pepper • salt and pepper to taste
The Execution 1. Add all of the ingredients (except for the chicken) to a container and immersion blend. 2. Cube chicken thighs and season and salt and pepper. 3. Heat a dry pan over high heat. Once it's very hot, add chicken and saute for about a minute. 4. Drain the excess moisture with a paper towel and set aside. 5. Continue cooking the chicken until the chicken is browned well. Continue draining excess moisture throughout the cooking process, but don't be overly aggressive. It won't take too long. 6. Once the chicken is browned and cooked through, remove from the heat. Pour peanut sauce over the chicken and stir well.
submitted by Sven-Ost to LowCarbKeto_Recipes [link] [comments]


2023.06.01 22:59 Sven-Ost Thai Style Low Carb Peanut Chicken

Thai Style Low Carb Peanut Chicken
Thai Style Low Carb Peanut Chicken
This makes a total of 4 servings of Thai Style Low Carb Peanut Chicken. Each serving comes out to be 344 Calories, 19.5g Fats, 3.9g Net Carbs, and 36g Protein.
The Preparation • 6 medium boneless, skinless chicken thighs (~25 oz.) • 6 tbsp. peanut butter, smooth (unsweetened) • 1/4 cup chicken stock • 2 tbsp. soy sauce • 1 tbsp. orange juice • 1 tbsp. lemon juice • 1/2 tsp. sesame oil • 2 tsp. chili paste • 1/4 tsp. coriander • 1/4 tsp. cayenne pepper • salt and pepper to taste
The Execution 1. Add all of the ingredients (except for the chicken) to a container and immersion blend. 2. Cube chicken thighs and season and salt and pepper. 3. Heat a dry pan over high heat. Once it's very hot, add chicken and saute for about a minute. 4. Drain the excess moisture with a paper towel and set aside. 5. Continue cooking the chicken until the chicken is browned well. Continue draining excess moisture throughout the cooking process, but don't be overly aggressive. It won't take too long. 6. Once the chicken is browned and cooked through, remove from the heat. Pour peanut sauce over the chicken and stir well.
https://www.facebook.com/groups/ketodietandintermittentfastingforbeginners/?ref=share
submitted by Sven-Ost to ketorecipes [link] [comments]


2023.06.01 22:56 Sven-Ost Thai Style Low Carb Peanut Chicken

Thai Style Low Carb Peanut Chicken
Thai Style Low Carb Peanut Chicken
This makes a total of 4 servings of Thai Style Low Carb Peanut Chicken. Each serving comes out to be 344 Calories, 19.5g Fats, 3.9g Net Carbs, and 36g Protein.
The Preparation • 6 medium boneless, skinless chicken thighs (~25 oz.) • 6 tbsp. peanut butter, smooth (unsweetened) • 1/4 cup chicken stock • 2 tbsp. soy sauce • 1 tbsp. orange juice • 1 tbsp. lemon juice • 1/2 tsp. sesame oil • 2 tsp. chili paste • 1/4 tsp. coriander • 1/4 tsp. cayenne pepper • salt and pepper to taste
The Execution 1. Add all of the ingredients (except for the chicken) to a container and immersion blend. 2. Cube chicken thighs and season and salt and pepper. 3. Heat a dry pan over high heat. Once it's very hot, add chicken and saute for about a minute. 4. Drain the excess moisture with a paper towel and set aside. 5. Continue cooking the chicken until the chicken is browned well. Continue draining excess moisture throughout the cooking process, but don't be overly aggressive. It won't take too long. 6. Once the chicken is browned and cooked through, remove from the heat. Pour peanut sauce over the chicken and stir well.
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2023.06.01 22:55 Sven-Ost Thai Style Low Carb Peanut Chicken

Thai Style Low Carb Peanut Chicken
Thai Style Low Carb Peanut Chicken
This makes a total of 4 servings of Thai Style Low Carb Peanut Chicken. Each serving comes out to be 344 Calories, 19.5g Fats, 3.9g Net Carbs, and 36g Protein.
The Preparation • 6 medium boneless, skinless chicken thighs (~25 oz.) • 6 tbsp. peanut butter, smooth (unsweetened) • 1/4 cup chicken stock • 2 tbsp. soy sauce • 1 tbsp. orange juice • 1 tbsp. lemon juice • 1/2 tsp. sesame oil • 2 tsp. chili paste • 1/4 tsp. coriander • 1/4 tsp. cayenne pepper • salt and pepper to taste
The Execution 1. Add all of the ingredients (except for the chicken) to a container and immersion blend. 2. Cube chicken thighs and season and salt and pepper. 3. Heat a dry pan over high heat. Once it's very hot, add chicken and saute for about a minute. 4. Drain the excess moisture with a paper towel and set aside. 5. Continue cooking the chicken until the chicken is browned well. Continue draining excess moisture throughout the cooking process, but don't be overly aggressive. It won't take too long. 6. Once the chicken is browned and cooked through, remove from the heat. Pour peanut sauce over the chicken and stir well.
submitted by Sven-Ost to KetoIFforBeginners [link] [comments]


2023.06.01 21:59 amira1295 Can I pre make this yogurt marinade for kebabs?

INGREDIENTS
1 cup plain whole milk Greek yogurt 2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil 2 teaspoons paprika ½ teaspoon cumin ⅛ teaspoon cinnamon 1 teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes (reduce to ½ teaspoon for less heat) Zest from one lemon 2 tablespoons freshly squeezed lemon juice, from one lemon 1¾ teaspoons salt ½ teaspoon freshly ground black pepper 5 garlic cloves, minced 2½ to 3 pounds boneless skinless chicken thighs, trimmed of excess fat and cut into 1½-inch pieces (see note) 1 large red onion, cut into 1-inch chunks Vegetable oil, for greasing the grill
I was thinking of making this ahead of time so it’s all ready for me to throw into the chicken tomorrow night. The only thing I would add with the chicken is the lemon juice. Will adding the garlic and other spices do anything to the yogurt?
I’m also open to suggestions on how to tweak this recipe. Was thinking of adding minced onion.
submitted by amira1295 to AskCulinary [link] [comments]


2023.06.01 20:29 jaygjay This chicken is BOGO Free right now. Will buying one pack be half price? Usually that’s how BOGO is but i’m unsure for meat.

This chicken is BOGO Free right now. Will buying one pack be half price? Usually that’s how BOGO is but i’m unsure for meat. submitted by jaygjay to publix [link] [comments]


2023.06.01 18:40 Feisty-Shopping6563 Need help identifying a weird rash on my 3yo..

(Gender): Female (Age): 3.5 (Ethnicity): Salvadoran/Caucasian (Weight): 45lb
My 3yo broke out in a rash and the creams that were prescribed to her isn't doing anything, in fact they look worse..
The rash is strange because it resembles almost like a herpe rash or fungal rash.. but she's never had chicken pox or shingles and she's been using fungal/steroid cream and it almost seems worse.
The doctor ruled out molluscum and cat scratch disease. We got a new kitten and while we make sure my 3yo isn't handling her a lot, the cats natural retracting claws to hang out while she's being held have left micro scratches on her arms and chest. They have healed, but we have debated if the cat scratches could be related in some way?
I have 3 children- all female and ages 6, 3 and 2 and nobody else (including my husband and I) have a rash. It's been two weeks of seeing this rash. At first it was itchy, but she doesn't seem to itch it or seem uncomfortable really.
It's on her back and upper shoulders, her arms and top of hands, thighs and lower legs and she has pimples on her buttocks she has had for awhile. She itches her bottom a lot and it's hard to moniter that because of her age, and I've debated if she has spread A bacterial rash from her bottom to her body?
Does this look bacterial? Is this fungal? Does she need to take an internal fungal medicine?
Side note, we swam at a man made lake here in SC recently and she seemed to break out after that, but nobody else has. Could this be related? Why do these spots look so clustered and like fluid filled small pimples?
Any help is kindly appreciated! Pic in comments of her back and thigh I took today.
submitted by Feisty-Shopping6563 to AskDocs [link] [comments]


2023.06.01 14:30 mofu_mofu No allergies on skin/blood tests, but multiple anaphylactic reactions and ongoing, strange allergy issues. Testing show normal mast cell markers. Beyond frustrated...does this sound like a possible mast cell disorder to you? Any advice/input appreciated!

Preface: first anaphylactic reaction in ~2017, ended up in ER wit face/throat swelling, severe diarrhea, full-body hives; all of this starting 4-5 hours after last meal. ER doctor assumed bc last meal contained shrimp that it must have been an allergic reaction to shrimp despite having had shellfish in my diet since young childhood (I'm Asian, some form of shellfish is in literally everything). A few months after, very very stupidly had some shrimp without any reaction - not even a mild one. Felt safe, so continued to have shrimp, shellfish, and other seafood without any issues afterwards until recently.
Medical history/issues: hypothyroidism, PCOS, migraines (no known cause, since high school). Dx'd ADHD and ASD, on medication (Vyvanse) for ADHD as well as Levo for hypothyroid. Caught COVID 3-4 times between 2019 to 2020 (sadly not joking), 3/4 times were confirmed via PCR or antigen testing, fourth suspected but not tested. Masked and was vaccinated & boosted but alas...the germ had gotten so brilliant (lol)
Bg info: Current diet is mostly comprised of meat (chicken > beef >>> pork), white rice, vegetables (peas, lettuce, cabbage, carrot, corn, soy sprout, spinach, bok choy, garlic). Seasonings are exclusively salt, sesame oil, and/or soy sauce - experimenting with miso paste at the moment as I've had intermittent issues with it. I don't use herbs or spices. I cook most meals from scratch and don't eat out. If I don't cook, my "cheat" foods are usually Lunchables Turkey & Cheddar (shoot me) or Special K + fairlife or soy milk. For the most part I have fairly bland taste, thankfully. I don't touch seafood period anymore.
Timeline:
2020
2021
2022
2023
Odd Reaction Notes (dunno what to call this, most of this is just a page in my notes app for my allergist lol):
Symptoms:
Some Foods I've Reacted To (Intermittently):
Phew. Sorry for the insanely long post. I'm at my wits end. It's been coming on three years now that I've been trying to get to the bottom of this and my allergist seems to be at the end of her rope too which honestly scares me a bit.
I'll admit that I've been extremely stupid about my "allergy" in the past (obviously if you're allergic to a thing, don't eat the damn thing!!!) but knowing now that I apparently have no food allergies, I feel like an idiot for the trouble my family has gone to in avoiding shellfish for my sake (especially with how hard it is to do that with Asian food). My family won't even eat it outside by themselves because of how severe my reactions have been the past two years. It feels really bad to think that all this stress and caution could've been for nothing.
I also feel so confused, because if I have no food allergies...why on earth am I reacting to food? Why are my reactions to food so inconsistent??? I don't know of anybody with food allergies whose allergies come and go. When I read the description of mast cell disorders or histamine intolerance, they seem to line up more or less with my symptoms, but having the test results come back negative and having inconsistencies with the low histamine diet does make me pause.
If it weren't for the fact that my reactions result in physical symptoms that are externally observable (hoarse voice, hives, swelling, low BP on monitor, etc.) I'd think this was all in my head/anxiety/panic attacks at this point. With my blood work and skin test results, it scares me that my allergist may just leave it at IA which doesn't answer anything for me. The way she explained it is that there isn't any known trigger (hence the "idiopathic" bit) which is 1000000x worse to me than any allergy.
To my knowledge IA isn't "supposed" to be tied to food-related triggers but what worries me is that, increasingly, my reactions aren't food-tied. But it does give me a (messed up?) sense of hope that much of my reactions do seem to be related to food and specifically eating it, so it might just be an allergy to something I don't know yet (🤞)?
I'd appreciate your input at all. Thanks for reading this huge wall of text :")
submitted by mofu_mofu to MCAS [link] [comments]


2023.06.01 10:19 datfumbgirl Have I been counting my calories wrong ?!

I buy the Costco skinless chicken thighs, not the frozen ones the other that come in the 6 pack… hope I make sense,
Anyways, I use those to meal prep etc. This whole time I have been weighing my chicken and inputting the calories based on the nutrition label while the chicken is cooked!!!
Should I have been figuring out the calories while raw?? How do I weigh my meats/chicken and count it accurately??
I cannot believe I have been miscounting,
I mean if I’m correct.,, I have been off every time by like about 300 calories, I’m petite, I’m trying to lose weight, every calorie matters, is this why it’s been such slow progress ?
How do I figure out calories for my cooked chicken now?
I suddenly feel overwhelmed 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫
I appreciate any input
submitted by datfumbgirl to CICO [link] [comments]


2023.06.01 08:13 xXQuakingAspenXx Might have set a record for our lake

Might have set a record for our lake
Okay I’m still shocked my friend and I managed to get this and I caught it straight off of my parents dock with just a worm. It’s a 22 inch, 5.4 pound bass caught on a 4 pound reel (I think it’s called idk, I just fish with my dad as a hobby) and we checked for my entire state and the biggest bass caught and recorded in mine was only 3 inches larger than this one. The second and third are also ones I caught for comparison. I don’t know if I can ever fish again, I think I used up all my luck!
submitted by xXQuakingAspenXx to Fishing [link] [comments]


2023.06.01 07:14 carpeggio The Easiest/Healthiest meal prep I know how to do.

For anyone who is really wanting to grind the game, I figured I might give some of you hardcore fans a way to minimize time to cook while balancing nutrition. I just wanted to put out a good convenient alternative.
Ingredients:
Tools:
Methods:
Chicken
Veggie
Rice
Result:
Pile up a bowl/plate with rice and veggie, and place your crispy chicken on top. The skin has become delicious cracklin' and there's plenty of chicken flavor here to further season the rice and veggie! Although add your favorite kind of sauce if you want to, it can go on anything I'm sure.
The macros on this are very good; good healthy-ish fats, chicken protein, clean carb, and fiberous veggie.
Portion into tubber-ware or add each to a large container and reheat. GLHF!
Note: I know this isn't going to be revolutionary, but there are some basic techniques maybe some don't know. This is the healthiest and most accessible recipe I know of, quite a bargain!
submitted by carpeggio to Diablo [link] [comments]