i was on an active delivery for doordash when i was making a right turn and got hit. though it was night and hard to see, technically i was at fault because i’d ‘failed to yield’ on a right turn. basically my little old ford focus was totaled that night, and its not too big of a deal because it had a lot of problems and id been saving up already for a better car. on the other hand, i happened to collide with a brand new looking land rover:/ so when it happened, the guy pulled so far down the street before stopping that i couldn’t see how bad the damage was on his car. anyways, the police arrived pretty quickly and exchanged insurance info for us. so the next morning i called my insurance and told them what happened and this is where i fucked up:
“i was driving for doordash and”
i want to make note that i’m 18, i just moved out and my dad was the one paying for my insurance because i was on his plan, so i had no idea of any rideshare add ons to the insurance because id never had to deal with that.
basically the moment i told the insurance agent that i was delivering for doordash, she told me that i wouldn’t be covered for myself OR the other party and that i should he expecting an email or call back with a formal denial.
panicking, i researched and researched if doordash had any kind of insurance that i could rely on and turns out they do, but only for the other party. and only if i was on an active delivery (which i was). currently i’m waiting on the formal denial letter from my insurance so that i can open a claim for doordash, but the two things i’m so worried about are

1. will doordash deny my claim because i didn’t have the rideshare/delivery add-on from my insurance?
   
2. even though i was on the way to the customers house with the food when i crashed, how can i be sure that they don’t try to deny that i was on an active delivery? about 20 minutes after i crashed i had contacted the customer and told her that i had gotten into an accident and wouldn’t be able to deliver her food so she should contact customer service and cancel her order for her money back. and then the order was cancelled. i also then called customer service and told them i was in an accident and all they did was made sure the order was cancelled. does anyone know if doordash has access to all of my deliveries and even if they were cancelled? also on the police report, he wrote down the time that it was reported and somewhere in the doordash system should show i was on an active delivery at that very time.
   

overall the main thing i’m concerned for and can’t think about anything else over is if all fails… whats gonna happen? because i cant afford to pay for someones rich land rover when i’m having to do doordash in the beginning just to pay for bills and have been trying to scrap up enough extra for a better car… i have no help from family either. has anyone been through something similar?😔

Original Source: https://boringmoney.in/p/byjus-is-sued-by-its-lenders (my newsletter Boring Money -- please visit the link if you'd like to subscribe and receive similar posts in your inbox)
--
Four years ago I read an article in The Ken titled The making of a loan crisis at Byju’s. The gist of the story was that Byju’s was an edtech doing phenomenally well selling its digital courses to parents of young students. But these courses were expensive and these parents were poor. So it was also selling them loans to buy these courses. Only, without telling them. Parents would expect a course (which could be cancelled) but would end up with a loan (which couldn’t be cancelled).
Three days ago, Byju’s went to court in New York. Here’s the headline from TechCrunch: Byju’s sues ‘predatory’ lenders on $1.2B term loan, won’t make further payments.
Byju’s is a company that, arguably, made a business out of giving out predatory loans. Now it’s sued its own lenders and accused them of being predatory. I’m not saying that this is poetic justice but.. okay, scratch that. This is poetic justice! If Shakespeare were a finance writer this is the kind of stuff he would come up with.

Everyone wants to lend to Byju’s

In 2021, interest rates were low, loans were cheap. Tech startups were doing great, edtech startups were crushing it. Byju’s, not one to be left behind, had raised a lot of money but money was cheap so it also wanted to borrow. It wanted a $500 million loan from lenders in the US, which it wanted to use to acquire companies there. Instead, it ended up borrowing more than double—$1.2 billion—because lenders practically wanted to throw money at this overachieving edtech startup from India. [1]
The way a term loan such as this works is:

1. A company goes to an investment bank and asks for a loan
2. The bank syndicates this loan to investors, who become the lenders. Everyone comes together in a room and negotiates the specifics of the loan (which can be quite complex, as we’ll see)
3. The loan goes through and everyone’s happy. Presumably, the company likes its lenders, the lenders like the company
4. The original investors might sell the loans they own to other investors. The company’s only talking to an administrative agent representing the lenders, so over time it might not even know who its lenders are

In November 2021, prominent investment managers such as Blackstone, Fidelity and GIC had gone overboard to lend money to Byju’s. By September 2022, Byju’s lenders were desperately selling [2] their loans at a 36% discount on the principal. (Today, Byju’s debt is at a 20% discount, which is also bad.)
It’s likely that Blackstone, Fidelity and other of the OG lenders aren’t Byju’s’ lenders any more. They’ve almost certainly sold off their loans at a loss. Better get paid something than get paid nothing.

Dealers of the dead

If a company’s debt is being sold at a 36% discount, it’s because investors think that the company is unlikely to repay its loans. If you buy such a loan, you potentially stand to gain a lot—because of the discount—but well, you might also just lose everything.
If you’re a regular investment management company, like Blackstone, you don’t want to invest in such a loan. Your investors gave you this money to get predictable returns. If they wanted risk, they’d ask you to buy stocks. You don’t want to get into a fight with your borrower. If you feel they will not pay you back, you take a loss, sell the loans, move on.
If you’re a distressed debt investor, your entire business is to buy such distressed loans from regular investment managers like Blackstone. You’re going to get nasty borrowers who are unlikely to want to repay their loans but that’s okay. Because you’re nasty too. You spend less time on financial models, more in courts and around lawyers. You like to fight to get your money back. Sometimes you might lose, but the times you win, you win big. The wins cover your losses and some more.
Blackstone and the others sold Byju’s’ loans in desperation, and they were almost certainly bought by distressed debt investors. We don’t know who they are exactly, but Byju’s has indicated that one of them is Redwood Capital, a New York-based distressed debt investor.
If you’re a distressed debt investor, this is how it works:

1. You get a loan for super cheap
2. If the company repays its loan, great! You make a lot of money
3. But the company isn’t likely to repay, which is why you got the loan for cheap in the first place
4. So it’s in your best interest to not let the company die a slow death. Instead, you want to kill the company quick. You take the company to court ASAP and take all the money you’re owed while it’s still there

If the new investors waited, say, for a year, and took Byju’s to court after it had actually defaulted on its repayments—there might not be any money left! Byju’s may have given all the money to Lionel Messi or maybe laundered it away someplace the lenders wouldn’t find it. If you’re a distressed debt investor, you want to get Byju’s to court and get the court to force it to do whatever it takes to pay you back.
Last month, Byju’s’ new lenders sued Byju’s in the Delaware Court of Chancery [3]. We’ll get to the official reasons for this lawsuit in a bit, but what’s important is that Byju’s was not being sued because it defaulted on a payment. It hadn’t. It was being sued because the distressed debt investors expect it to default sooner or later, and they would prefer dealing with it sooner rather than later.

Lenders go for the kill

Usually, the finer details of corporate loans such as Byju’s’ aren’t public. But thanks to the multiple lawsuits we know quite a bit here.
The loan was made to Byju’s’ US entity and it was secured with guarantees from multiple Byju’s companies. From Byju’s’ lawsuit this week against its creditors (which I will get to), here are the guarantors:

1. Byju’s entities in India and Singapore
2. Byju’s’ US and Singapore acquisitions; companies including Oros, Epic, Great Learning, and Neuron
3. Whitehat India, Byju’s’ famous Indian acquisition

That’s a lot of companies guaranteeing a loan! Byju’s’ Indian entity is the parent of all the other guarantor companies, so having it as a guarantor should’ve been enough. I guess the rationale here was that it would be nice to have some non-Indian companies in the mix too, we do know how efficiently Indian courts work.
Apart from Byju’s the parent company itself, Whitehat was the only other Indian company guaranteeing this loan. The problem was that Whitehat itself, on paper, had negative net worth. It had probably taken loans of its own and did not have enough assets to cover them. In practice, this would be irrelevant, because Whitehat was owned by Byju’s and it would cover any of Whitehat’s liabilities. But, apparently, RBI regulations require Indian companies with negative net worth to take its approval before guaranteeing a loan. So even though Whitehat was a guarantor, the guarantee was meaningless until RBI granted its approval.
Yeah, well, RBI didn’t grant its approval. From the lawsuit:

Plaintiffs, Borrower, and Lenders had a call on or around October 6, 2022, to discuss the Whitehat Guarantee. In a good faith effort to negate any impact of the new regulations, Plaintiffs and the Borrower offered to move all assets out of Whitehat India into other subsidiaries of the Parent Guarantor that are Guarantors to the Credit Agreement, or are owned by Guarantors of the Credit Agreement.
Lenders rejected this proposal without justification.

In October 2022, after Byju’s’ debt was already sold to the distressed debt investors, the company spoke to its lenders and informed them that it was unable to get RBI’s approval for Whitehat to be a guarantor. Instead, it offered to move Whitehat’s assets into other companies and then use those companies to guarantee the loan. Which would really have been the same thing. But the lenders refused! Why?!
Continuing from the lawsuit:

Lenders subsequently asserted that an event of default under Section 8.1(e) of the Credit Agreement (an “Event of Default”) had occurred due to the failure to procure the Whitehat Guarantee.

Oh, that’s why. Byju’s’ lenders—distressed debt investors that wanted Byju’s dead ASAP—used the fact that Whitehat couldn’t be a guarantor of this loan to claim a default and use it as a reason to take Byju’s to court in the US. Honestly, I’m impressed. The Whitehat guarantee was redundant to begin with, but the lenders had found an out and their official reason #1 to take Byju’s to court.
Oh, there’s another thing. In June 2022, The Ken reported that Byju’s’ financials for 2021 had been held up by its auditors because of certain, umm, creative accounting. By this time, Byju’s should have ideally filed even its 2022 financials. It was very late! From the lawsuit:

The FY’21 Audit was delivered to the Lenders on August 30, 2022. It did not contain a “going concern” qualification or any similar qualifications about the Parent Guarantor’s ability to continue into the future.
However, the FY’22 Audit could not begin until the FY’21 Audit had been completed, and the Parent Guarantor’s business has continued to grow rapidly

Byju’s’ 2021 financials were held up because auditors weren’t giving the company their go ahead, so of course its 2022 financials were held up as well.

On or around August 29, 2022, Shearman & Sterling, LLP (“S&S”), counsel for GLAS, sent a letter to Byju’s Alpha and Think & Learn requesting certain financial disclosures from Plaintiffs and Borrower, and asserting that the failure to deliver this financial information was a breach of the Credit Agreement.
...
Rather than actually suffering any damage from the delayed FY’22 audit, Lenders opportunistically used this unintentional and non-material delay to exert pressure on Plaintiffs and the Borrower to extract onerous economic concessions.

I love it! Byju’s’ financials were delayed. Its agreement with the original lenders said that the company must share its audited financials with them. Byju’s wasn’t able to do that. The lenders found their official reason #2 to take Byju’s to court.

Byju’s sets up an offence

Before the lenders sued Byju’s last month, Byju’s tried its best to negotiate a deal. It gave the lenders an assurance of the company’s financial health, gave them concessions worth “tens of millions of dollars” and requested (pleaded) to take back their claims of Byju’s defaulting.
The lenders refused. They asked for either the full principal back or two-thirds of it, with an increment of 7% (!!) in the interest rate. Byju’s, of course, said no.
At this point, Byju’s knew that the lenders weren’t going to negotiate realistically. So it prepared its own offence. From the lawsuit:

The Credit Agreement prohibits transfers or assignments of the Lenders’ interests in the Term Loans to “Disqualified Lenders.”
The Credit Agreement includes in its definition of Disqualified Lender “[a]ny [] Person (including an Affiliate or Approved Fund of a Lender) whose primary activity is the trading or acquisition of distressed debt,” and “those banks, financial institutions and other Persons separately identified by name . . . on or before the syndication . . . (which may be updated . . . from time to time . . .)”

In its agreement with the original lenders, Byju’s had put in a clause restricting its loan from being transferred to distressed debt investors. This is a risky clause to agree with, because it’s only these folks that buy loans that turn sour, but the original lenders had gone with it.

On information and belief, the entire course of Lenders’, and Defendant’s, bad-faith conduct has been driven by these distressed-debt lenders, who were never meant to have been lenders in the first place, and who acted with the intent of causing harm to Borrower and Plaintiffs. Meanwhile, Borrowers and Plaintiffs were initially unaware that the lenders were in fact being controlled by distressed debt dealers, and were therefore unable to take action to prevent their bad-faith plan from being implemented.

In its lawsuit this week, the crux of Byju’s’ argument is based on the fact that its loan is owned by distressed debt investors who were not eligible to be owning its debt in the first place. Also interesting is that Byju’s doesn’t seem to know who these lenders are. In its post-lawsuit statement, Byju’s named Redwood as one of the lenders, but it’s not named anywhere in the lawsuit.

Now what?

If push comes to shove, does Byju’s have the cash to pay off its lenders?
Last month, Byju’s transferred $500 million out of its US entity. The lenders had filed their lawsuit and there was a chance the court would freeze Byju’s’ US entity’s assets, so this was a precautionary move. So Byju’s has this $500 million. But that seems about it. Byju’s has been in the news saying that it’s trying to raise $700 million to pay off its debt. Yeah, between the horrible edtech market and the colourful lawsuits Byju’s is in, good luck with getting investors to donate their money to Byju’s.
But of course, Byju’s is now suing its lenders too. It does have an agreement that says that its debt can’t be held by distressed debt investors. So it’s not a frivolous suit.
Can Byju’s win? Sure. It would still have to pay its debt eventually. And it’s not straightforward. There are probably tens or even hundreds of lenders. It’s apparent that the distressed debt investors are the guiding force behind the lenders’ lawsuit, but it’s definitely not necessary that they form the majority of the lenders. In which case, Byju’s’ whole lawsuit falls apart.
The lenders are saying Byju’s defaulted by not keeping its part of the agreement, even though it had technically paid its dues. [4] Byju’s is saying that the lenders shouldn’t be the lenders in the first place and must be disqualified. We’ll see who’s right.
​
Footnotes
[1] It was a 5-year loan with a floating interest rate of 6% over Libor. Think of it as 6% over this magical interest-rate called Libor that some fancy-pants banks set amongst themselves everyday. Back in November 2021, Libor was at 0.25% and this was a 6.86% interest loan for Byju’s (the floor for Libor was 0.75%). Today, Libor is at about 5.64% and it’s an 11.6% loan.
[2] Multiple reasons for the investors to sell. One, interest rates went up and cash became more dear. If they had money stuck with Byju’s, it was money not being lent out to someone else. Second, edtech all around the world was in trouble. Kids were back in school and people didn’t think much of them anymore. Third, Byju’s as a company was showing its red flags.
[3] What a cool name!
[4] Until now, that is. Byju’s filed its lawsuit this week the same day it was supposed to make a $40 million interest payment.
​
Original Source: https://boringmoney.in/p/byjus-is-sued-by-its-lenders

Hello, so I thought id share this short little story, maybe somebody finds it interesting and helpful. So I got dumped by my ex gf 3 years ago after 3 years of relationship. While together we got ourselves a flat with new furniture, I wasn't 100% most perfect boyfriend I can admit there were some flaws but I know from my perspective I always were kind and caring for her, we barely got in fights and she showed a lot of affection to me. She had a problem with me that I wasn't very outgoing, because she loved to dance in clubsand get wasted a lot and i would much rather stay home, do sports, read books or play videogames. I was very close to proposing to her but then one day she decided that she doesn't love me anymore and wants to find something better. Now im forced to move to a cheap 1 bedroom apartment for rent. First year of the split if was very embarrassing because i tried to reach out to her and get together. She also sometimes would invite me to meet together but in the end she would also reject me and say that she doesn't want a relationship, so then i completely gave up and started a no contact for 2 years. In this time I had a 3 month relationship with another girl but we weren't really good for each other and ended it, i don't regret that. In those 2 years I really worked on my career and self improvement, recently finally bought myself f a new flat and I am ready to move somewhere else. Just 2 weeks before moving I see my ex i no contacted for 2 years on street with another guy, and guess what - that guy looks like a drug addict/zoomer, and she also has changed her look, similar to that guy, obiously prefering this lifestyle. All of those sleepless nights thinking of her, waiting her to contact me. All this time improving myself and in the end she choses an obvious fentanyl abuser moron over me. Yeah, good luck with that. I say hi to her and pay no more attention. Im finally ready to move on and start a new life - I know my worth and im definitely better than this. If anytime I don't care - a year or 10 years later she tries to contact me - get ignored b**ch and enjoy the life you chose.

So. I (F28) met a guy at work (M38) and told him I had never been asked out on a proper date. Like an actual go out to dinner and really be treated to a nice night. I usually just get invited to hang out at someone's place or treat them to a meal or activity etc.
Anyway, we had hung out a few times prior at his place and such which is perfectly fine since my life is a cartoon and nothing ever happens "typically" to me lol. So, I had spent the night at his and when we woke up, he tells me what he has planned for the day. We're gonna get up, get ready, drive over the pass to the "big city" (we live like 64 miles east of a big touristy town for the area over a mountain pass) and spend the day over there, eat, see a movie, shop, really whatever fits the bill. I'm like cool, sounds like a day, fucking pumped for it, love it.
We head over, having a great time, lots of laughs, good conversation etc. It's like an hour drive so great time to chat lol. We dick around for a while and decide to go eat at a local pub style resturant in town that we don't really get to enjoy unless we're in the area so why not? Well, we're talking and eating and get some drinks. Specifically, Irish Death. I had about 4 or 5 20oz glasses and I think he had like 2 lol. Bill comes, he paid, and he goes yknow I think we should hit the restrooms before we leave and I was like nah I'm good (foreshadowing, I was not). He goes to the restroom, I don't. I have never liked using public restrooms, my mom was a bit of a germaphobe when I was younger so I just got good at holding it lol. Anyway, he comes back, I stand up and in that moment, I transitioned from stone cold sober, to fucking loaded in a blink of an eye. But I got my shit handled and we walked out to the car and head home.
As we are driving, I'm noticing the pressure in my bladder begins to build. Okay, whatever, I got this. We make it over the pass. Fabulous, only like 30 miles to go. The pressure is becoming painful. Still got this. Make it into the first bigger town in the valley. Tell dude we should stop at my place because " I gotta race like a piss horse", he's like cool, not a problem we should grab some extra clothes and shit while we're there too. I'm like hell yeah, 30miles just went to like 15, I got this but GOD do I have to pee.
Keep on driving. We get 1 (one) mile away from my house and I am begging this man to pull over because I AM going to piss myself. I'm doing the potty dance, wiggling, anything to distract from the agony that I am in. This man says we are less than a mile away and as he says this, I uncontrollably piss myself.
Do you know what it's like as an adult, to look into the eyes of another adult and tell them you just pissed yourself? because I didn't until that moment. This man is howling. He's like "ONE MILE!!!! WE ARE ONE MILE AWAY!!!! I CAN SEE YOUR HOUSE!!!!" which I am apologizing like a mad woman in between my own laughs because of course I would do this on my first real date.
We pull into my place, I immediately grab a towel and cleaner (THANK GOD for leather seats) and clean his car up, go inside, say thank you for the date and apologized again. Told him he can leave (because even though I'm tanked and laughing, I am mortified) and I'm sorry for any trouble and I totally understand if he doesn't want to see me again, no hard feelings because I would also like to never see me again too. He reassures me because now I'm starting to break down. I strip and get in the shower and ugly cry and when I got out he was just chilling on my couch. I told him I was ok and he really doesn't have to wait for me and I'll be ok. I go to my room and throw on the most depressing and comfy clothes I have because, clearly, I will never see him again because I'm a nightmare. I plop on my bed and curl up to cry and have my drunk pitty party, and he comes in and curls up right behind me on my bed and just held me.
After like 2 mins of my pitty party he gently shakes me and goes "so, are you done? Ready to get up now? We have plans still and I still wanna hang out with you." I spun around so fast because, like, really??? Were you not there for this whole traumatic experience??? And he just said, next time I suggest we use the restroom, you should probably do that lmaooo.
Anyway, we're engaged now and I have never been more happy or loved in my entire life and this is definitely one of the most embarrassing stories that has ever happened to me. But, hey, now it's at least on the internet for forever.

I am very interested in older movies, music and performing artists. I have a pretty good education on information about films, tv shows and music. Really meaning like if someone asks a question on who’s the actor or who’s singing a specific song i find myself with the answer a lot of the times and i sometimes know facts and growth of the person,movie, or band. My question is what can i do with this type of information? Are there jobs for historical entertainment? I believe i am very knowledgeable or at least very interested in this type of topic. What can i do with this hobby? Are there jobs that i can benefit and enjoy?

I watched few videos on YouTube and my wife is ticking most of the boxes od narc. I saw the comments under those vids and it made me really depressed. Everyone is either divorced or going through abuse.
One lady on jer video directly said: "And remember There is NO Happy Ending!"
I've found this reddit and all of you speak about Nexes.
Is that it? There is no happy ending? Can instead of my wife becoming nex can she become "Still my wife EX Narc".
I am in a moment in my life when I finally starred communicating my needs. Somebody who appeared in my life showed me that I deserve more so I am trying my best to fix things with my wife so we become happily ever after. I have two beautiful daughters (3mo and 3yo) and I really don't want to mess-up their lives. Especially that I am their only hope.
About a month ago I told my wife that we either work together on the relationship or it is gonna fall apart. I even used some strong words like "I don't know if I love you anymore" which was true at that time. I gave us years to fix this - she derves that much.
She is not doing much. Her psychiatrist gave her few tips and she didn't do anything from the things he gave her. I said what I need, and nothing from that list happened either. I am tired asking for sex, hugs, kisses, etc. I need some efort from her side.
Here is the problem: Timing for my needs is really bad. She gave birth 3 months ago. We have two kids to take care of and most of the time they are under her supervison. Under those circumstances my needs seem like too much to ask for because she is constantly tried (needs to wake up at night to feed the baby).
Send some love please. I really want to save my marriage, kids and house with a mortgage 😀

Does anyone know if I have to send transcripts from every college I attended even though they’re from the same district?
I sent the transcript from my main college and it includes all the courses I took from the other colleges in the same district, so they said I only need to request one transcript.
On my to do list, it’s showing the other colleges transcripts as required, and my main college isn’t on the list (Parchment says my transcript was downloaded so UCSC already received it).
Should I just request a transcript each for the other colleges?

Hey guys, its my first time to ever get approved for a CC in East West Bank. My only credit that i use is the CIMB Revi Credit, yung virtual credit that i can use for online purchase and do cash advance. Funny story sa EW, i applied via ESTA and i abandoned the process dahil sa sobrang olats nung interface, i think i stopped during the face camera stage. ANyway di ko na tinuloy and na nonotify ako na i have a pending application, if i want to complete, i can just head to the ESTA site anytime.
​
That was March, and fast forward to May, I got a text na i am already approved. Na wierduhan ako ase nga di ko naman tinapos ang application ko. Anyhow, i went to ESTA Messenger and totoo nga, i have a cc with them. In fact nagamit ko na for paying my utility bill.
What i do with my Revi Credit is use it for all utility bill, pero ang hapit kase ng sched din nila, my statement date is June 6 and my due date is June 26. I always pay in full, pero pansin ko nga, dahil siguro hindi naman talaga sya credit card, malaki din ang tubo na binabayaran ko example 7K lang ang total spend ko last billing cycle, but i have a 7300 bill. I think 3% ang monthly interest ni CIMB.
​
Now my questions are:

1. because i want to manage my EW CC diligently, what are your best practices in scheduling a purchase? may nagsabi sa akin about my statement date but i dont have that info yet. Although sabi ni ESTA, i was approved May 26, so is that my statement date? so if i purchase after the 26th, kelan sya babayaran? or better yet anong dates ang dapat kong tandaan so i can leverage the billing/due date
2. Sa mga may EW card, gaano katagal ang delivery?
3. And sabi sa akin i have my first annual fee waived. meaning May 2023 to April 2024 is free pero i will be charged na ba ng Annual fee on May 2024?

Slamaat at pasesnya sa mga typos, im doing this sa reddit mobile

This may be my last post because I use RIF. The debacle with this API monetization thing gives me a great out -- my wife sometimes [sic] calls herself a "Reddit Widow" which . . . hurts.
Story time:
I gave my son a decent Leatherman pocket knife for Christmas.
I had it engraved with:
"To ***** I Love You, Dad" and "If found call 541-852-**** for reward". If you have sons, you know why.
Well, he lost the knife a few weeks ago in downtown Eugene. Did it fall out when he got in/out of car? Not sure.
A week or so goes by . . .
Homeless camp (or something - details unclear). A woman shows off the knife. A man checks it out.
After the gentleman reads the inscription on the knife, he trades her a (rock/gem/hipppiecrystal?) for my son's knife. He then gives her his personal knife because she says she needs a knife for protection. She is homeless and has to deal with issues that I don't want to try to imagine.
So this random dude gave her his knife in exchange for my son's knife. Who does this?
Not two days later my son gets a call from some rando that says he has his knife. He explains to him that he is homeless and wants to get the kinfe back to its owner. He asks for nothing.
As a father, I was concerned.
Over a couple of weeks, there were several calls from random numbers -- all from this same homeless dude -- asking when they could meet. There was some hesitance, naturally.
Eventually, my son met up with this kind 40ish year old man, and this gentleman returned it without a hitch.
Apparently, he was super friendly and just wanted to make sure a son got a gift from his dad back.
So . . . Remember: Homeless people can be kind. I know I need to work on judging less. Hoping this story helps you do the same.
I want to give my thanks to you (Name Unkown but there is a Z and an 8 in there, maybe?) - Your kindness is noted, appreciated, and gives me more apprication for the human spirit . . . You could have just kept that knife -- but no -- you went out of your way with multiple phone calls to my son and got his knife back to him.
Thank you, Sir!
----FWIW, my son gave him a sleeping bag and a few other camping supplies as a reward
-- I wish I checked the spelling of "empathy" in the title

I don't want this to be too identifying so I'll keep the description of events vague.
Several years ago my partner's family 'helped us' buy a home. The scenario is a little weird, but we were moving internationally for my partner's career, and without consulting (or even pre-warning) me my partner's family announced that they'd put a down payment on a house for us to live in, in the new country.
I was uncomfortable with the situation as we'd not discussed the issue at all and I wasn't sure if we could even afford the mortgage, but it was awkward because the house was framed like a gift to us, and my partner was relieved to have a home sorted in our new country. The house was directly represented to us as 'our' house, and so I also understood what a privilege it was to be able to contribute to our own mortgage rather than pay rent.
But problems began almost right away. It took me a few months to find a job in the new country and my partner was very stressed paying the bills. When I found a job, he asked that I provide him with my full income each fortnight to cover my contributions to the mortgage and bills. As my pay rose amidst promotions over the years, so did the sum he asked for. Eventually when my salary rose to be equal to his, I persuaded him to 'let' me keep a portion of my income in a separate savings account. Otherwise, he has insisted that he be responsible for paying the bills, which he does out of his personal account that I transfer money to.
Recently my partner is looking to move again for his career, and we are weighing the options of what to do with our home. Amidst this, it has come out that 'our' house is actually purchased and owned by my partner's family trust. I'm honestly flabbergasted. Over the past several years I've contributed over $300,000 to what I believed were mortgage payments and home renovations. My partner has now revealed they view that money as rent.
This has obviously caused a huge problem in the relationship. I'm not happy about being in my 30s and having no assets to my name, and I also feel like I've been douped into a rental situation which has significantly limited my prospects to build up any assets of my own. I've naturally relayed these concerns to my partner, but he refuses to engage with me on this and is really just feeding me non committal answers until I drop it. I just want to know what the legality of all of this is?
I've never signed a rental agreement, so I'm not sure if I can just be declared a renter? I don't even know how I want to proceed, but my biggest worry is that if either one of us decided to bail on the relationship I'll be completely fked over financially.

Hi there!
I'm sure we all seen plenty of posts here about Reddit Ads, its mysteries, hostility towards advertisers and bunch of other stuff that makes advertising here harder.
To uncover this mystery (at least partially), I decided to do some experiment. Its goal is to basically understand which Reddit ads is good, which is bad. The experiment is still ongoing, so I encourage everyone who is curious to share their opinions, ask questions, etc.
A bit of background
I run a Reddit Ads library. Now it has around 35,000 Reddit ads samples (collected within the last few months). The only qualitative metrics I have about these ads are: comments and upvotes numbers. Obviously, these are not good metrics, because many ads have high number of these - filled with copypasta, hate comments, and so on.
Using this database that I have, I decided to go a step further and analyze these comments - to understand their sentiment and basically find the way to say which ad is good or bad at scale.
Idea
The idea is to analyze as many comments under these ads as possible via a simple python script and get the number (which is a score of sentiment).
The number consists of 3 parameters: negative sentiment, positive sentiment, and compound.
For the simplicity of sharing results, I use compound value in this post. Here is how it looks like, for example: https://i.imgur.com/sFVykW8.jpg
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Technical details

• I picked higher-level comments only (to make sure they relate to the ad, not to other comments)
• I picked ads with no less than 5 comments (to avoid ads with 1-2 comments from OP)
• Out of ~35,000 ads in my collection, only 912 passed this criteria
• Out of these 5 comments, I picked only the ones less than 300 characters long (to avoid long copypasta)
• The script checked each of these comments and analyzed the likelihood of its average "positive" or "negative" sentiment, as well as the "compound" score.

Results:

• After the script evaluated each of these 912 ads that passed the criteria, I realized that the avg compound sentiment value of <0.1 can be the proxy to "Bad" ads, while the same value of >0.4 can be the sign of a good ads
• Again, "Good" means the one appreciated by community (meaning we see some positive comments about the ad itself or the product)
• "Bad" means the opposite: scam accusations, bad feedback, etc etc

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Examples:
Ads considered to be Bad (with a score):

• https://www.reddit.com/useTheNutroCompany/comments/10l51vs = -0.35
• https://www.reddit.com/useeBay_AU/comments/13lmvsm = -0.24
• https://www.reddit.com/usePickle_bet/comments/1020eca = -0.17
• https://www.reddit.com/useruv_esports/comments/13pm1ec = -0.149
• https://www.reddit.com/useImbred-/comments/bcmuy9 = -0.13
• https://www.reddit.com/usehvmnd_rendering/comments/10i4q48 = -0.11
• https://www.reddit.com/useHalleCastle/comments/y65ypl = -0.107
• https://www.reddit.com/usecakedefi_com/comments/11f5ngi = -0.066
• https://www.reddit.com/usebinge/comments/10jwzij = -0.018
• https://www.reddit.com/useOAT-LY/comments/1127h23 = -0.013

Please, pay attention: some of these have a good enough engagement, and even awards. Still, the sentiments below these are evaluated in the lower range.
Ads considered to be Good (with a score):

• https://www.reddit.com/useCopy_That_Show/comments/1009784 = 0.545
• https://www.reddit.com/useLisilinka/comments/zbfeua = 0.513
• https://www.reddit.com/useLily_island/comments/10nd2ef = 0.458
• https://www.reddit.com/usemtsiri/comments/13rjv8i = 0.408
• https://www.reddit.com/usedragonzapedu/comments/wpov9a/ = 0.399
• https://www.reddit.com/userun-chicken/comments/116sf4q = 0.374
• https://www.reddit.com/usepurrplecatmusic/comments/uzyd95 = 0.34
• https://www.reddit.com/useFlutterFlyers/comments/109forn = 0.329
• https://www.reddit.com/useBublyWatecomments/11ywrzj = 0.284
• https://www.reddit.com/usetinyBuildGAMES/comments/zl6d9g = 0.267

Takeaways
Well, that's the most intersting thing. Currently I clean my data & manually check more examples - to discover possible ways to 'refine' the takeaways for some specific industries/niches - and come up with some plan for promotion (eg: what works/doesn't work for music producers for Reddit Ads).
Aside from that I'm looking to analyze more comments and see common objections user might share (and again - match it back to the category/niche).
The full results are available in the library - current users already have access for it, but if you are also curious - feel free to reach me. The library is free and open to everyone.
More ideas/suggestions?
I keep playing with results, so if I find a way to structure them in a better way - I'll be happy to share. The comments under this post will also help me understand how interesting/helpful this might be.
Thanks for reading! 🙌
​
ps: 'AI' in the headline refers to the nltk python package which did the heavylifting for sentiment analysis (which is truly impressive) 🔥

I was physically abused as a child and faced alot of neglect growing up being a middle child. I got a partner and she had a history of abandonment and sexual abuse which manifested in alot of fear and anxiety. I had alot of trust issues but I allowed her in enough to be my partner. I coped using drugs but I decided to quit to fully experience her and try to get her out of the dark place we were both in. She was a very anxious person so she gets over stimulated at events. I have to say though she was anxious to try doing anything for me. I didn't ask anything of her buy she once offered to make me strawberry lemonade but she never did because she was scared to try and fuck up. I kept encouraging her to do things that made her scared. I took get out on dates almost everyday. She liked coffee but see the thing is she was in an accident and she always got anxious when I was driving. I drive like a Kenyan so abit valid. The only time I've been in an accident with her is when a bike bumped into me when we were in traffic. The bike guy was being a bike guy. That frustrated me alot, her lack of trying to make me happy, I didn't ask for anything but she never tried to do anything except showing up. But I'm in love with her showing up was enough but it frustrated me. I was feeling very disconnected from her and I had a very stressful project that I was working on and I shared my situation with her, where I was mentally. She'd listen to me and tell me everything will be okay but I decide to go for a fair with her. To get out of my head and enjoy some quality time with her. We get to the venue and meet a friend who was eating some noodles and he shows me where the stand is. We go through all the stands and as we're about to leave she sees her abuser and she wants to leave the venue. I say that's fine let's do that as I take away the food as that was the last thing. As we're taking away the food she meets one of her friends and she talks to him. The abuser comes and sits like 10 metres behind her and she doesn't know. I was with her as she talked to the friend so I make her aware of the situation then we leave immediately after. She was upset that I didn't leave the venue immediately or that I didn't give her the car keys to walk alone to the car. This became a big issue in the relationship but I feel like she never considered my experiences. It took her 10 months to make the lemonade that I never asked for but she never forgave me for that. So was I an asshole for getting the food?

I'm sorry for the long post! Tldr at the end.
Hey all, I've been hesitant to post here because I didn't really want to face the possibility of having IC. But the symptoms are getting worse by the day and I need advice. My husband and I keep digging through the internet to find a way for relief, and he keeps noting that it might also be psychosomatic, although I don't know if psychosomatic symptoms can be this bad.
I'm 27, trans male, on HRT for 2,5 years. I've always had a bit of a nervous bladder, that part is definitely psychosomatic, basically I always had to make sure I peed before going anywhere or doing anything where I wouldn't be able to go to the toilet, "just in case" (I know this isn't good for the pelvic floor, I had good and bad phases, and I already actively tried to stop myself from going if I don't really have to). I found out peeing up to 8 times a day is considered normal and I definitely pee more often than that, I noticed this because my husband pees like 4 times a day and I was wondering about the discrepancy between our toilet habits. (I could technically go less often, but I feel my bladder not being empty, so I want to pee).
About 2 months ago, I got a bad vaginal superinfection, and it's lasted until today, being treated with anything available. Along with it came pressure on my bladder, and over time, a burning sensation behind the pubic bone. The burning got quickly worse to the point it's constant, it sometimes goes away for a little after peeing but not for long. I thought I had a UTI, obviously, but my urine was tested 3 times and nothing. I also have discomfort in my urethra and get bladdeurethra spasms that are super unpleasant, like the exit of my bladder seems really tender and reactive. Especially at night it's disruptive to get these spasms because they always startle me a little. I've never leaked urine but it's uncomfortable nonetheless. I've been losing sleep over this. I don't really have to get up at night to pee, but the burning and pressure keep me awake. I've started getting panic attacks at night as well, and without sleep medication (pipamperone, and lorazepame on particularly bad nights) I actually do not sleep at all. I just drowse through the night.
I've spoken to my urologist multiple times and he said this is a "menopausal" thing because I'm on testosterone. He said menopause can make you feel like you have a UTI even though you don't. I don't know about that, I know menopause can make the tissues and pelvic floor weaker, causing frequency - but burning? Whenever I look it up, IC is the first thing that shows up (next to an acute UTI).
It's worth noting that since March, I've been going through severe depression and anxiety because I'm in a very tough spot. I'm being treated for it, but my future is very uncertain. Hence my husband's suggestion that this might be psychosomatic. Over the weeks I ate less and less and lost weight and my overall interest in life, so I wouldn't be surprised if my infection was due to that and my immune system being whack right now, I just don't know about my bladder.
I've started with the IC diet this week, although I haven't seen any connection between food/drinks and "flares", as the symptoms are constant. Never observed any diet related issues in the past, either. I also tried baking soda a few times but that didn't make the burning go away either. Stuff like Azo and Prelief are not available in my country, I'm from Germany. I've tried Ibuprofen but that didn't help. All I can do is drink a lot of water and chamomile tea.
I have a cystoscopy scheduled in 2 weeks, thing is the week afterwards I'll immediately be going to a psychosomatic clinic for 6 weeks and won't be home for that time, and if it turns out to be IC I don't know how or if I'll get treatment and how to follow my diet. From what I've read, it only shows up in a cystoscopy if you have "real" IC (as in Hunner's lesions) and I'm scared I'll be brushed off if it turns out to be fine. My urologist is very hung up on my HRT and that the lack of estrogen is causing my issues. I understand the impact on my vagina and the inflammation there but I highly doubt lack of estrogen causes burning in your bladder.
I'm very scared and need any advice I can get. My quality of life is so low right now, I force myself through the days and it's bearable when my husband is around, but when he's at work during the week I'm so overwhelmed with everything and cry a lot because I feel so alone and restricted. So far my urine has only been tested for the regular UTI stuff, like inflammation markers and bacteria. I don't know if it's worth considering checking for ureaplasma or whatever else there is. In September I have an appointment at a different urologist who also specializes in trans health care and has experience with IC, but that's still a while to go.
I think I need to be told everything is gonna be okay. Because right now, I feel like my life is over. I'm always in pain and nothing works and I feel so helpless and so many meds I read about aren't available in Europe. I miss laughing with my husband and going on walks carefree and I miss my sex life. I don't know if this is really psychosomatic, or if it's IC, or if it's because of lack of estrogen, but I'm so exhausted by now. It's been weeks and weeks on end. I want to feel better.
Tldr: Developed a constant burning sensation and spasms in my bladder about two months ago while going through severe depression and anxiety and while having a vaginal superinfection. Not sure if it's psychosomatic or IC. Urologist says it's because of lack of estrogen (I'm trans male). Tested negative for UTI three times. Cystoscopy is scheduled in two weeks and I'm scared. Haven't been able to sleep. Meds like Azo and Prelief are unavailable in my country. Haven't ever noticed any "flares" after certain foods or drinks. Need advice and emotional support because my life feels like it's over.

Started a bit of a writing project and I figured it may be worth sharing the first part with y’all’s. For background, Pride month for me is always a time of introspection. My Fairy Godmother is doing a 30 days of Pride on her socials and after some conversation with her I realized that my queerdom is something that my actual mother, though accepting, have really never talked about and given how much it has informed who I have become it seemed like something I should share with her.
I offered to go through the writing prompts with her as a means of showing her the deeper part of that iceberg and the day one question had be digging into my being agender.

Dear MomGoon
I appreciate you coming along with me on this and I hope it gives you a bit of insight, encourages questions, and maybe we both learn a bit along the way.
Share your name, age, and identity. Share a picture of yourself.
Hi my name is KaiGoon, I'm 44, Bi, and agender. My pronouns are they/he. I figured out a long time ago that my attraction to others is over a broad spectrum and has everything to do with the individual.
Agender is a bit trickier to nail down and probably where you went "WTF?". I'm comfortable in my own skin and the body that has carried me though this life so far. I am male, I'm guy shaped. Folks look at me and say "yup that a guy". It's my default setting, "Sex" in the biological definition.
My relation with gender, as in the social construct, that where I go off the beaten path. My retirement from the Navy got me thinking a lot of the interlocking circles I exist in and how they bring definition. Some are big like nationality and race. Some are more nuanced like being a vet, an expat. All of are things I can point to, turn over in my hands, and look at. Some feel wonderful, some are beautiful, some leave cuts on my hands, and some are greasy and ugly and I'd rather not touch them.
But the more I look into "being a Man" as what it means to me as part of my identity, it's a big empty. I dont think it's a disillusionment with toxic masculinity anymore as I have tons have had a lot of great men in my life as friends and mentors.
Still, at the end of the day it has always felt like a party I kinda walked in on while going somewhere and everyone assumes I should be there but I never got an invite in the first place and meant to go somewhere else.
I know it brings great deal of meaning to a lot of folks, John Waters would balk as much as John Wayne if you called him "Girl". But for me, it's just the box I came in and figuring that out for myself was a large weight off my shoulders. All that being said, I know how I present to the world and how folks perceive me and I know how it affects how I interact with the world. I was reading an interview with actress Indya Moore and part of what she had to say really stood out.
"“….I'm non-binary but I don't really talk about it that much. I don't feel like people really are there yet for understanding it, which I don't mind, but I also acknowledge the way people see me as a woman. And because I'm seen as a woman, a cis woman or binary presenting, people are going to hold me up to those same standards that women are held up to.“.
Does this change anything? Outwardly, not so much but it has certainly given me a better understanding of myself. Consider this like a patch note on a program. "Some coding tweaks to improve performance."

Hi guys,
I'd like to hear what you have to say about this topic, if you had similar experiences and how you dealt with them. Let me break down the situation.
A new gym opened in the town I live in, big franchise name. I was excited since I just moved back into town and wanted a gym that has good competition training, a motivated coach and a system that's known to create world champions and high level competitors and from talking to the coach via IG it seemed to be just that.
I waited months for the gym to open and after a few hiccups it finally did. The coach seemed competent and excited to be here and the first few sessions were fine. After a while he started to become more negligent, playing with his daughter during class (his gym, his rules I guess?), having almost hour long monologues, very seldomly rolling with us. Mind you "us" means 2-3 people at that point. People were not coming in by the masses despite the big brand name.
One of the students asked if he could let us know when his child is gonna be in class with him. And he refused and took it so personally he basically started ignoring the student and treating her like she was some super villain. More weeks passed and here and there a class was just cancelled, or he assumed no one was coming. Sometimes it was just me showing up at 6 am for training and he tought I wasn't coming because I didn't text him the day before which I thought was weird.
After a while more people joined and he tried to make a good impression on them by being friendly, roling with them and giving proper training. Once they signed up the quality started declining. He was often times on the phone for 3/4 of the class, stopped rolling with us almost completely and had us repeat drills for almost all sessions of the day, not specific sparring or anything, just the movement. And after that free rolling. There was no concept or anything. Sometimes he'd just say "today you are just stretching", Like, what did I come here for? Are you a yoga instructor? Or "today only sparring". And it seemed like he was just too bored to coach.
Now here is where it gets interesting one day he just left. We had keys to the gym so we could enter as we pleased since we were only a small group of people at the gym and it was a very familiar setting. I got there after a small vacation and asked the others where the coach is and they didn't know either. Is it normal that a coach just leaves and doesn't give you a task for the time he is away? I mean there were two people in charge of opening and closing the gym but they didn't get any input as to what the plan is for the time away. So what we did is try to work on a few techniques and work them into concepts, which was a big plus for us and especially the beginners.
We talked about the situation among ourselves and why our coach just left without proper input or explaining what's going on and we felt very confused and abandoned, me especially because I was preparing for one of the biggest tournaments so far.
After a week or so our coach came back and said "today only rolling". No "hey sorry for just leaving", "how was the week, what did you do?" Nothing, like the whole situation never happened. Through Instagram we saw he was taking care of his other school abroad. I know it's just a week, but in school if the teacher is missing for only a day, the substitute gets stuff to do for the class right.
Since I knew one guy in training was heavily injured and the other one rather old, I asked camly but with a touch of confusion "Only rolling? Can we do something else where we can learn a bit better, like drills or something, rolling is fun and all but we might need something else right now." He was clearly not happy I asked that and was like whatever, I said roll but you can do whatever you want. So we did as he said and sparred for an hour.
After class I asked him if he had time to talk, so I could address the whole "leaving without notice" situation, and he said no. But started a meltdown where he yelled at me for "disobeying his orders" "trying to be the boss" and being disrespectful with how I said it. He imitaded me and said I made a super annoyed sound like "pfffft roolling?? reaaaaally??? pffffffffffffff cant we do something else???" I apologized to him for the way it came across and for how it made him feel and started to address the actual topic and he basically said "we are lucky he didn't just close the gym" and if we want to know whats up we should have texted him. After about an hour of talking and realising he either doesn't get the issue or just doesn't think he's at fault, we left. After a weekend we talked about the issue again and now he alleged that us talking about his week of absence is talking shit about him and not being loyal and basically us voicing our opinions in the gym in front of the cameras is considered a betrayal.
Long story short, I left the gym and the remaining 6 months of my contract and started at another good gym. But from what I hear classes are still getting cancelled randomly and people are being ignored or maltreated for no apparent reason.
How can someone file a complaint about this gym owner / franchisee?
Is this grounds enough for a partial refund of my membership?
Have you had similar experiences?
Thanks for reading all of this if you did, enjoy your day and keep jiu jitsu gay.
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