This was my first "big boy" award redemption I've done and it couldn't have gone better. Before, I've booked Hyatt rooms overseas and gotten the companion pass so been doing award travel for a while, but this was the first time we flew in J and first time being able to realize a "bucket list" trip thanks to award travel.
Here was our itinerary (started in SFO):
Barcelona -> Granada -> Cordoba -> Seville -> Ronda -> Setenil de las Bodegas -> Malaga (only to fly out of).
Planning began last summer, and the flights were booked then. Since this was the first time we've ever flown in J and it was the honeymoon, I wanted to make sure we spent a little extra for a nicer European carrier, and I wanted to try two of them. So on our flight there we flew KLM into Barcelona via Schiphol, and for the flight out we flew Air France from Malaga via CDG. We opted against doing TAP or Ibera for two reasons despite them being more direct: the product/service is apparently not as nice, and for Iberia it would have required a positioning flight into LAX. Next time we do Spain though, I definitely would give them a shot.
Points and cost break down
We did a LOT of research on the best programs and flights to do this trip and ultimately landed on Flying Blue. For one, while they do have fees, they were not exorbitant. For two, their products were very well reviewed. I'll get more into our actual experience in the review section below. But also crucially, there just happened to be a point transfer bonus going on at the same time from Chase that boosted our points by 25%.
Airfare:

• Total Points on flights spent: 205,000 + ~$1000 in fuel charges for 4 J one way tickets (+25% transfer bonus totalling to 247,000 points booked)
  
• SFO -> BCN 128,000 + $500 for x2 J on KLM
  
• AGP -> SFO 119,000 + $500 for x2 J on Air France. [We had originally planned on getting back to Barcelona or perhaps connecting up through Madrid to fly back home, but we discovered Malaga had ridiculously cheap redemptions out of Malaga this time of year for AF. Don't be afraid to not always go for the biggest cities to fly out of! We booked our flights first and figured out our plans later, so this ended up determining the overall itinerary we ended up taking.]
  

Other travel costs, all booked in advance about 1-2 months out:

• BCN -> GRX: $220 for x2 tickets on Vueling (paid for the checked luggage in advance). [This was the only other flight we did as the train from Barcelona to Granada would have taken all day, while this flight is only an hour. It would have been cheaper to fly into Seville or Malaga but we chose to follow a "better" route for our itinerary to correctly time some festivals we wanted to experience.]
  
• Renfe high speed rail: $~30-40/pp, each leg. [We did this from Granda -> Cordoba -> Seville]
  
• Bus: Only real way to get to Ronda and Setenil from Seville. $~30/pp for a (miserable) 2hr bus ride from Seville -> Ronda (we showed up late and the bus was cramped). $~11/pp for a 45 min ride from Ronda -> Setenil. $~25/pp for a 1.25 hr bus ride from Setenil -> Malaga.
  

Hotels:
We only booked one hotel on points and it was in Barcelona. Overall, we found mom & pop run B&B's and AirBNB's to be a far better value than traditional hotels in most of Spain. But, Barcelona had some good options for some redemptions. Ultimately we decided on:

• Barcelona - Wittmore Hotel. 116,000 Hyatt points for 4 nights (29,000/night, which was their peak season rate that had just kicked in for May).
  
• Granada - AirBNB Riad $466.40 USD for 2 nights. [We kind of overpaid on this, but the property was gorgeous and we really wanted to stay in a well located riad which this place was.]
  
• Cordoba - Patio del Posadero. $168 for one night + $35/pp for their optional breakfast. [Absolutely fantastic place and the breakfast, while being an upcharge, was well worth it.]
  
• Seville - AirBNB rooftop apartment. $613 for 3 nights. [Again, slightly overpaid for this compared to other options. But, the location was flawless and the rooftop view of La Giralda was impossible to beat.]
  
• Ronda - AirBNB apartment. $50 for one night
  
• Setenil de las Bodegas - vacation 3 story rental cave house. $120 for one night. [We really wanted to sleep in a cave house and this rental company (not associated with AirBNB) had a great selection for stupid cheap prices. We didn't need all the space but why not?]
  
• Malaga - Barcelo Malaga. $159 for one night. [Picked mostly because it was right next to the transit terminal.]
  

Reviews and other notes
Airside:

• SFO lounge of choice was the Delta Skyclub, in a different terminal from our flight. The KLM lounge was closed for renovation, and they were having people go into China Airways lounge instead. That looked terrible, so we decided to just deal with going through security twice. With CLEAR + Precheck, it was a non-issue. Getting into Skyclub took a bit of work. We had to show the receptionist the policy on Delta's website that says any Flying Blue J tickets gain access (not just Delta) as their scanner can only recognize Delta tickets. Even still, we were denied - until they manually looked up our ticket using their terminals. Only then did we get in. Overall, the Skyclub was great. Not too busy, free (basic) cocktails, and the food + showers were good. Loved the view too. We were there for breakfast and lunch.
  
• KLM business class was fantastic, but they screwed up our seats during an unannounced plane change so everyone's seats got scrambled and none of the couples were sitting together in the honeymoon configuration (my spouse was directly in front of me). While disappointing, it didn't impact our experience of the flight much. All of the food and drink was great. We especially liked their house Negroni. The seat itself felt quite new, and offered a lot of privacy which I loved. The cabin did run a bit hot though, which made it hard to sleep. I thought with lie down seats I'd be able to enjoy sleeping on the plane more but because we had a 2pm take-off my brain just wasn't having it so it was more like a sleepy nap. Still, I'm officially spoiled. The best part though was the service. ALL of the attendants were sociable, attentive and very kind. They even gave us a cute little gift for our honeymoon (and of course the ceramic houses).
  
• At Schipol, we had a 5 hour layover that we split between went to two of KLM's flagship lounges, one on the schengen and non-schengen sides. The non-schengen lounge was absolutely incredible. Two levels, including an outdoor patio! The food options were great, seating was plentiful. The only thing we didn't like is that they were charging for drinks here (at full price...) unless you went to some tiny tucked away bar where they would only serve you basic beer and wine. There was a completely unused restaurant on the second level too that felt like a big miss. We took a shower, which was fine - but the shower was a little small for my liking. On the schengen side, the lounge was much more modest but perfectly functional. Again, not much to drink... except for the G&T dispenser, which we made liberal use of.
  
• When flying out, we went to the Malaga lounge as it opened at 5am. We weren't here for long but it was perfectly adequate. It was neat being able to see out on the tarmac on one side while on the other side seeing a zen garden + the airport interior below.
  
• We connected to CDG, and went to the Air France lounge on the non-schengen side. Wow, CDG is as much of a shitshow as they say to connect through, but as long as you follow the signs we managed just fine. We only had 45 minutes inside the lounge here, and found the lounge to be quite disappointing overall, especially compared to KLM's offerings. It was small and crowded, thrown into a basement with no view and only had one buffet section that was also crowded and constantly being drained of food. Your only drink options outside of coffee were to pour yourself some wine.
  
• Air France was by far, much worse than I was expecting (I only learned later that they JUST introduced a totally new business class product a month before our trip). The boarding experience was a complete shit show - they just had all groups, 1-4 line up at the same time, and then had to have everyone stand aside on the long catwalk to let in the wheelchairs that they forgot to let board first. The plane was at least 30 years old and showed. My seat's footrest was completely detached from the seat. The seat itself was far less functional in how it used its space compared to KLM's and it was much less private feeling. I get it, I don't need to be on a super new plane every time but things were pretty in disrepair. Our toilet on our side of the plane was completely out of order, which I didn't learn about until after I had already used it (they knew about it before and didn't bother to tell me). I paid for Wifi, which then did not work at all for the entire flight. Food was pretty good, and I liked how many courses there were compared to KLM. But again, like at the lounge, drink options outside of wine were quite bad, pretty much the only thing they could make us cocktail wise was a basic G&T. The service was overall quite bad. Everyone was super nice and put on a good face, don't get me wrong. But outside of meal service, you pretty much had to track down an attendant for anything. Nobody ever responded to attendant calls and the expectation was to just go up to the mini-bar and help yourself to something (which I liked in concept but in reality they mostly just had apples and crackers and water there). Overall, it wasn't bad. The food was good and it was a lie down seat. But compared to KLM, it was no comparison.
  

Groundside:

• The Wittmore hotel was initially only picked because all the cheaper Hyatt's in the area were booked out. By oh my god, am I glad I went with them. By FAR the best experience we've ever had at a hotel. If you visit Barcelona, just go here. It's that good. The service was spot on from the moment we walked in and were treated to complimentary cava to the moment we left and they let us eat breakfast before opening time while they booked a cab for us. The hotel itself looks gorgeous, and they have this lovely interior courtyard many of the rooms look out onto that you dine in. It's tucked away in the heart of the gothic quarter in this charming little alleyway. An area that we later learned was THE place to be for Barcelona at night. All within a 5 minute walk were some of the best tapas we had and some of the best bars we went to. The room itself was fantastic - super comfortable bed, good bathroom and gorgeous finishes. The minibar is completely free and doesn't cheap out - it includes fixing for making gin & tonics, cheese boards, nice water and was restocked every day. Breakfast is, somehow, completely free every day - and it's a full service 3 course breakfast where every dish we tried was fantastic. I don't know how they make money doing that, but it was sure an awesome value addition. On top of ALL of this, there was a lovely rooftop pool with gorgeous views of Barcelona that we could order drinks up to.
  
• I'll skip reviewing the airBNB's since they are so seasonal & can't be booked with points, but we enjoyed staying at each one. Not an airBNB but we especially loved Patio del Posadero in Cordoba. Definitely book this one with cash if you're visiting Cordoba. Similar experience and level of service as Wittmore Hotel, but in a tiny 8-room B&B that a couple runs. Wittmore + Posadero really made us feel like we were in an episode of BBC's Poirot, which absolutely tickled us.
  

Total out of pocket costs

• 320,000 UR points
• $~1000 fuel charges
• $~3000 all other food, airfare, travel, lodging, souvenirs

Prices are firm, but I take off $.75 for every $10 spent (multiple items)
I accept PayPal, Venmo, & Cashapp
Codes are always split/dual portion where applicable, & have no DMI
Only redeem portion you pay for
New additions
14 Blades HD/VU $4.5
3 Extremes (2004) HD/VU $4.5
355 HD/MA $4.5
48 Hrs 4K/VU $6
600 Miles HD/VU $4
80 for Brady HD/VU $6.5
A Journal for Jordan HD/MA $5
A Man Called Otto HD/MA $6.5
A24 5-Film Set (X, Green Room, It Comes at Night, Hereditary, Witch) HD/VU $15
Ad Astra 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
Addams Family (2019) 4K/IT $4.5
Addams Family 2 4K/IT $5
Addams Family With More Mamushka! (1991) 4K/VU $5.5
After Yang HD/VU $4.5
Agent Game 4K/VU $5
Air Force One 4K/MA $6
American Carnage 4K/VU $5
American Gangster (Ext) HD/MA $4
American History X HD/MA $4.5
American Underdog HD/VU $4.5
Amsterdam HD/GP $3.5
Anatomy of a Murder 4K/MA $5
Annie (1982) 4K/MA $5.5
Ant-Man & Wasp Quantumania 4K/MA $9.5 or HD/MA $8
Apocalypse Now (Final Cut) 4K/VU $5
Apocalypse Now 3-Cut Set (Thea, Redux, Final) 4K/VU $8.5
Aqua Teen Forever Plantasm HD/MA $5
Armageddon Time HD/MA $6.5
Art of Self-Defense HD/MA $4
Assignment HD/VU $4
Baby Driver HD/MA $4
Babylon 4K/VU $7 or HD/VU $5.5
Backdraft HD/MA $4
Banshees of Inisherin HD/MA $4.5
Barb & Star go to Vista Del Mar HD/VU $4
Batman & Superman Battle of Super Sons HD/MA $6
Batman HD/MA $4
Battle Royale (2000) HD/VU $4.5
Beast HD/MA $5
Bedknobs & Broomsticks HD/GP $3.5
Before I Go to Sleep HD/MA $3.5
Belly 4K/VU $5.5
Ben is Back 4K/VU $5.5
Best of Enemies HD/IT $3.5
Billy Lynn's Long Halftime Walk HD/MA $4
Birdman HD/MA $3.5
Black Adam HD/MA $5
Black Panther Wakanda Forever HD/GP $3.5
Black Phone HD/MA $5
Blacklight HD/MA $4
Blazing Saddles HD/MA $4.5
Blindspotting 4K/VU $5.5
Blood Money (2017) HD/VU $3.5
Blues Brothers HD/MA $4
Bodyguard (1992) HD/MA $4.5
Boogie 4K/MA $6.5
Bram Stoker's Dracula 4K/MA $5.5
Brian Banks HD/MA $3
Bride of Frankenstein (1935) HD/MA $3.5
Brightburn HD/MA $4.5
Bullet Train HD/MA $5
Captive State HD/MA $4.5
Casablanca 4K/MA $6
Casino HD/MA $4
Cats (2019) HD/MA $4
Cecil B. Demented HD/VU $4.5
Charade HD/MA or IT $4
Charlie Brown 4-Film Set HD/VU $15
Christmas Classics Set (Home Alone, Jingle All Way, Miracle on 34th Street '94, A Christmas Carol '84) HD/MA $18
Cinderella (2021) HD/MA $4.5
Clerks 3 4K/VU $5
Clifford Big Red Dog HD/VU $4
Clint Eastwood A Cinematic Legacy HD/MA $3.5
Colony 4K/VU $5
Coming to America 4K/VU $5
Cotton Club Encore 4K/VU $5.5
Craft Legacy HD/MA $4.5
Creed 3 HD/VU $9
Criminal HD/VU $3.5
Cube (1997) HD/VU $5
Damsel HD/VU $4.5
Dangerous 4K/VU $4.5
Daniel Craig 4-Film Collection HD/VU $12
Dark Crystal 4K/MA $6
Dark Places HD/VU $4
DC League of Super-Pets HD/MA $5
Death of Me HD/VU $4
Death on Nile HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Die in a Gunfight 4K/VU $5
Dig 4K/VU $6
Doctor Strange in Multiverse of Madness HD/GP $3.5
Dog HD/VU $4.5
Dolittle 4K/MA $5
Don Verdean HD/VU $4.5
Downton Abbey A New Era HD/MA $4.5
Dracula (1931) HD/MA $3.5
Dream a Little Dream HD/VU $4
Drive HD/MA $3.5
Duck Dynasty Wedding Special HD/VU $4
Dungeons & Dragons Honor Among Thieves HD/VU $10
Earth Girls are Easy HD/VU $4
Eddie Eagle HD/MA $4
Eighth Grade HD/VU $4
Elvis HD/MA $4.5
Empire of Light HD/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $4
Equalizer HD/MA $3
Escape Field 4K/VU $5.5
Escape from LA 4K/VU $5.5
Escape Room Tournament of Champions (Thea & Ext) HD/MA $5
Event Horizon 4K/VU $5.5
Everything Must Go HD/VU $4
Expired 4K/VU $5
Fabelmans HD/MA $6.5
Fair Game (Director's Cut) HD/VU $4
Fantastic Beasts Secrets of Dumbledore HD/MA $4.5
Farewell HD/VU $4
Fatherhood HD/MA $4
Favourite HD/MA $4.5
Fear of Rain 4K/VU $5.5
Field of Dreams HD/MA $4
Finding You 4K/VU $5
Flashback (2020) HD/VU $4
Forbidden Kingdom HD/VU $4.5
Ford v Ferrari HD/MA $4
Forrest Gump HD/VU $3.5
Fortress Sniper's Eye HD/VU $4
Freaky HD/MA $4.5
Friends With Kids HD/VU $4
From Here to Eternity 4K/MA $5.5
Ghost in Shell (1995) 4K/VU $5
Ghost In Shell 2.0 HD/VU $4.5
Giant 4K/MA $5.5
Gift HD/IT $3.5
Glass HD/MA $4
Gloria Bell HD/VU $4
Godfather HD/VU $4
Good House 4K/VU $6
Great Wall HD/MA $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Green Inferno HD/IT $3.5
Green Lantern Beware My Power HD/MA $4
Greenland 4K/IT $5
Guns Akimbo HD/VU $4.5
Habit 4K/VU $5.5
Halloween Curse of Michael Myers HD/VU $4
Halloween Ends HD/MA $5.5
Halloween Kills (Ext) HD/MA $4
Happy Death Day HD/MA $4.5
Hard Luck Love Song 4K/VU $5.5
Heat (Director's Cut) (1995) 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
Hellbenders HD/VU $4.5
Hellboy Animated Double Feature (Sword of Storms, Blood & Iron) 4K/VU $7.5
Hellraiser Judgment HD/VU $4
Highlander 4K/VU $5.5
Honk for Jesus. Save Your Soul. HD/MA $4.5
House Next Door Meet Blacks 2 4K/VU $5.5
House of 1000 Corpses HD/VU $4
House with a Clock in Its Walls HD/MA $4
Humans HD/VU $4.5
Hunt for Red October 4K/VU $5.5
I Love You Phillip Morris HD/VU $4.5
Ides of March HD/MA $3.5
In Blood HD/MA $4
In Secret (2014) HD/VU $4.5
Incredible Hulk HD/MA $4
Independence Day (1996) 4K/MA $5.5
Indiana Jones & Raiders of Lost Ark HD/VU $4
Infinite HD/VU $4.5
Inhabitant HD/VU $4.5
Interview HD/MA $3.5
Iron Man & Hulk Heroes United HD/GP $3.5
Isle of Dogs HD/MA $4
It Happened One Night 4K/MA $5.5
Italian Job 4K/VU $6.5
Jackass Forever HD/VU $4.5
Jobs HD/IT $3.5
Jobs HD/MA $3.5
Joe Kidd HD/MA or IT $4
Jordan Peele 3-Film Collection (Nope, Us, Get Out) HD/MA $11
Journey to West Conquering Demons HD/VU $3.5
Juliet, Naked 4K/VU $5.5
Ju-On Grudge HD/VU $4.5
Jurassic World 6-Film Collection (Dominion Thea & Ext) HD/MA $18
Jurassic World Dominion (Thea & Ext) HD/MA $5
Kama Sutra HD/VU $4.5
Kill Zone (2005) HD/VU $4.5
King Richard 4K/MA $5.5
King's Man 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/GP $3.5
Knock at Cabin HD/MA $7.5
Knock Knock HD/VU $3
Knowing 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Knowing/Push Double Feature HD/VU $7.5
Labyrinth HD/MA $4.5
Lair of White Worm HD/VU $4.5
Lara Croft Tomb Raider 4K/IT $4
Last Duel HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Last Flag Flying HD/MA $4
Last Picture Show 4K/MA $5.5
Let Them All Talk 4K/MA $5.5
Lightyear HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Limey (1999) 4K/VU $5.5
Locked Down 4K/MA $5.5
Lyle Lyle Crocodile HD/MA $5
Mack & Rita HD/VU $4.5
Mad Max 1-4 Set 4K/VU $18.5
Mad Men Complete Series HD/VU $35
Magic Mike's Last Dance HD/MA $6.5
Magnificent Seven 4-Film Set (1960, Return, Guns, Ride) HD/VU $13
Man of Tai Chi HD/VU $4
Man Who Fell To Earth (1976) 4K/VU $6
Manchester by Sea HD/VU $3.5
Marksman HD/MA $4
Marlowe HD/MA $7.5
Mask of Zorro 4K/MA $6
Mauritanian 4K/IT $5
Meatballs HD/VU $4
Memory HD/MA $4
Men HD/VU $4.5
Men in Black 3 HD/MA $3
Menu HD/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $4
MIB International HD/MA $3.5
Mickey & Minnie 10 Classic Shorts HD/MA $5.5 or HD/GP $5
Mid-Century 4K/VU $5
Midsommar HD/VU $4
Miracle on 34th Street (1947) HD/MA $4
Missing SD/MA $4
Mitchells vs Machines HD/MA $4.5
Mommy HD/VU $4
Moonfall 4K/VU $4.5
Morbius HD/MA $4
Moving On HD/VU $5.5
Mrs Harris Goes to Paris 4K/MA $6
My Brilliant Friend Season 1 HD/VU $4
Nashville (1975) HD/VU $4
Needle in a Timestack 4K/VU $5.5
Night House HD/GP $4
No Country for Old Men HD/VU $4
No Sudden Move 4K/MA $6
Nope HD/MA $5.5
Northman HD/MA $4
Oliver! 4K/MA $5
Once Upon a Time in Hollywood HD/MA $3.5
Paradise Highway 4K/VU $5.5
Paranormal Activity 1-8 Collection HD/VU $22
Paranormal Activity Ghost Dimension (Unrated) HD/VU $4.5
Parasite HD/MA $4
Paul Blart Mall Cop 2 HD/MA $3.5
Paw Patrol Movie HD/VU $4.5
Percy Jackson Sea of Monsters HD/MA $3
Perfectos Desconocidos HD/VU $4
Phantom Thread HD/MA $4
Piano (1993) HD/VU $4.5
Pretty in Pink HD/VU $3.5
Prey for Devil 4K/VU $6
Prince of Egypt HD/MA $4.5
Princess Bride HD/IT $4.5
Proud Mary HD/MA $3.5
Pulp Fiction 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Push 4K/VU $6
Raid Redemption (Thea & Unrated) HD/MA $4.5
Ran (1985) 4K/VU $5.5
Ratatouille HD/GP $4
Red Heat (1988) 4K/VU $5
Redline (2010) HD/VU $4.5
Reign of Assassins HD/VU $4.5
Repo Genetic Opera HD/VU $4.5
Rescuers Down Under HD/MA $5 or HD/GP $4.5
Rescuers HD/MA $5 or HD/GP $4.5
Reservoir Dogs 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Retaliation (2017) HD/VU $4
Right One 4K/VU $5.5
Rocky Knockout Collection 1-4 (Rocky IV w/ Thea & Rocky vs Drago Ultimate Cut) 4K/VU $20
Rules of Attraction HD/VU $4
Rumble HD/VU $5
Running Man 4K/VU $5.5
Saint Maud HD/VU $4.5
Sausage Party HD/MA $3.5
Scott Pilgrim vs World HD/MA $4 or 4K/IT $4.5
Scream 4 HD/VU $4
Scream HD/VU $4.5
Searching HD/MA $4
Secret Garden (2020) 4K/IT $5
Secret in Their Eyes HD/VU or IT $3
Sense & Sensibility 4K/MA $5
Seven Psycopaths HD/MA $4
Shawshank Redemption 4K/MA $5.5
She Said HD/MA $6.5
Shooter 4K/VU $5
Silent Night, Deadly Night 3-Film Set (3-5) HD/VU $8
Silent Twins 4K/MA $6
Silk Road 4K/VU $5
Sing 2 HD/MA $4
Sing Street HD/VU $4
Skeleton Twins HD/VU $4.5
Smile HD/VU $5.5
Smokin' Aces 4K/MA $5.5
Snake Eyes G.I. Joe Origins 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Son of God HD/MA $3
Sonic Hedgehog 2 HD/VU $4.5
Source Code 4K/VU $5.5
Spartacus HD/MA $3.5
Spider-Man No Way Home 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
Spinning Man HD/VU $4
Spirit HD/VU $4
Spontaneous HD/VU $4.5
Star Wars A New Hope 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/GP $3.5
Star Wars Empire Strikes Back 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/GP $3.5
Star Wars Return of Jedi 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/GP $3.5
Starship Troopers 4K/MA $6
Strange World HD/GP $4
Stripes 4K/MA $5
Taken 2 HD/MA $3.5
Tangled HD/MA $4
Tar HD/MA $6
Teen Spirit (2019) HD/MA $4
Teen Titans Go! & DC Super Hero Girls Mayhem Multiverse HD/MA $6
Teeth HD/VU $4.5
Ten Commandments (1923) HD/VU $4
Ten Commandments (1956) HD/VU $4
Tetro HD/VU $4
Thing (1982) 4K/MA $5.5
Thor Love & Thunder 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/GP $3.5
Till 4K/IT $7
Time Freak HD/VU $4
Tomb Raider Cradle of Life 4K/VU or IT $5.5
Top Gun Maverick 4K/VU $6 or HD/VU $4.5
Touched With Fire HD/VU $4.5
Transformers Dark of Moon 4K/VU $4.5
Transformers Revenge of Fallen 4K/VU $5
Tucker Man & His Dream 4K/VU $5
Turning Red HD/GP $3
Twilight 1-3 (Ext Editions) HD/VU $10
Twixt HD/MA $4
Umma HD/MA $4.5
Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent 4K/VU $5
Uncharted HD/MA $4
Uncut Gems HD/VU $4
Underwater HD/MA $4.5
Venom Let There Be Carnage HD/MA $4
Virtuoso 4K/VU $5
Vivo HD/MA $4.5
Voyagars 4K/VU $5
W. HD/VU $4
War of Worlds 4K/VU $5.5
War on Everyone HD/VU $4
Warhunt 4K/VU $4.5
Waterworld HD/MA $4
Weekend HD/VU $4
Weird Science HD/MA or IT $4
What We Did on our Holiday HD/VU $4
Where Crawdads Sing HD/MA $4.5
Whiplash HD/MA $4
White Christmas HD/VU $4
Whitney Houston I Wanna Dance with Sombody HD/MA $5.5
Wicker Man (1973) HD/VU $4.5
Wind River HD/VU $4
Winnie Pooh Springtime with Roo HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Wolf Man (1941) HD/MA $3.5
Woman King HD/MA $5.5
Women Talking 4K/IT $7
X-Men Days of Future Past Rogue Cut 4K/IT $5.5
All other movies (A-Z)
101 Dalmatians HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
12 Years a Slave HD/MA $3.5
13 Hours Soldiers of Benghazi HD/VU $2.5
1917 HD/MA $3.5
2 Fast 2 Furious 4K/IT $3.5
2 Guns HD/VU or IT $2.5
21 Jump Street HD/MA $3
3 From Hell (Unrated) 4K/VU $4 or HD/VU $2.5
31 (2016) HD/VU $2.5
310 to Yuma 4K/VU $5
47 Meters Down HD/IT $3.5
47 Meters Down Uncaged HD/VU $3.5
47 Ronin HD/MA $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
50/50 HD/VU $4
71 HD/VU $4
A Clockwork Orange 4K/MA $5
A Dog's Purpose HD/IT $3
A Good Day to Die Hard (Ext) HD/VU $2.5
A Most Wanted Man HD/VU $3.5
A Quiet Place HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
A Quiet Place Part 2 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
A Wrinkle in Time HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Abominable 4K/MA $5.5
About Time HD/VU or IT $3.5
Action Point HD/IT $2
Adore HD/IT $3.5
Adventures Of TinTin HD/IT $2.5
After Earth HD/MA $3
Age of Adaline HD/VU or IT $3
Aladdin (2019) 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Alex Cross HD/VU or IT $2
Alfred Hitchcock 5-Film Set (Saboteur, Shadow of Doubt, Trouble with Harry, Marnie, Family Plot) 4K/MA $24
Alice Through Looking Glass HD/GP $3
Alien 6-Film Collection HD/MA $18
Alien Covenant HD/MA $2.5
Alien Resurrection HD/MA $4
Alita Battle Angel 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
All Eyez on Me HD/IT $3
All Money in World HD/MA $3.5
Allied HD/VU $3.5
Aloha HD/MA $3.5
Alvin & Chipmunks Road Chip HD/MA $2.5
Amazing Spider-Man 2 HD/MA $4
Amazing Spider-Man HD/MA $3.5
American Assassin 4K/VU $4.5 or HD/VU $3
American Frontier Trilogy (Sicario, Wind River, Hell or High Water) HD/VU $7.5
American Made 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
American Night HD/VU $4
American Reunion HD/VU or IT $3
American Ultra HD/IT $4
Anchorman 2 Legend Continues HD/VU or IT $2.5
Angel Heart 4K/VU $5.5
Angel of Mine 4K/VU $5.5
Anna 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Anna Karenina HD/IT $3.5
Annie (2014) HD/MA $3.5
Annihilation HD/VU $3
Antebellum 4K/VU $5
Ant-Man & Wasp HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Ant-Man HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Apollo 13 4K/MA or IT $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Arctic HD/MA $4
Army of One HD/VU $3
Arnold Schwarzenegger 6-Film Collection (Last Stand, Total Recall, T-2, Red Heat, Maggie, Hercules in NY) HD/VU $14
Arrival HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Ash vs Evil Dead Season 3 HD/VU $5
Assassination Nation HD/MA $3.5
Assassin's Creed HD/MA $3
Atomic Blonde 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/MA $3
August Osage County HD/VU $3
Avengers Age of Ultron HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Avengers Endgame HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Avengers HD/GP $3
Avengers Infinity War HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Back to Future 3 HD/MA $3.5
Back to Future Trilogy 4K/MA $14 or HD/MA $9.5
Bad Boys for Life HD/MA $4
Bad Grandpa HD/VU or IT $2.5
Bad Words HD/IT $3
Bambi 2 HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Bambi HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Bangkok Dangerous HD/VU $4
Bank Job HD/VU $3.5
Barbie & Her Sisters in Great Puppy Adventure HD/VU or IT $3.5
Barbie in Princess Power HD/IT $3.5
Barbie Star Light Adventure HD/IT $3.5
Battle of Year HD/MA $3.5
Battleship HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Baywatch HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Beatriz at Dinner HD/VU $4.5
Beauty & Beast (1991) HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Beauty & Beast (2017) HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Before I Fall HD/VU or IT $3.5
Begin Again HD/VU $3.5
Beirut HD/MA $3.5
Ben-Hur (2016) HD/VU or IT $3.5
BFG HD/MA $3.5
Big Eyes HD/VU $3.5
Big Hero 6 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Big Lebowski 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
Big Little Lies Season 1 HD/GP $2.5
Big Short HD/VU or IT $3.5
Birth of a Nation HD/MA $3.5
Black Panther 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $2.5
Black Widow HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Blackhat HD/IT $3.5
Blair Witch (2016) HD/IT $2.5
Blair Witch Project (1999) HD/VU $4
Blockers HD/MA $3.5
Bloodshot HD/MA $4
Boardwalk Empire Season 1 HD/VU or IT $4
Bombshell 4K/VU $5
Book Club 4K/IT $3
Book Club HD/VU $2.5
Book of Life HD/MA $3.5
Born a Champion 4K/VU $5
Boss Baby 2-Film Set HD/MA $6
Boss Baby HD/MA $2.5
Bourne Identity HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Bourne Legacy HD/VU $2
Bourne Supremacy HD/VU $3.5
Bourne Ultimatum 4K/MA or IT $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Boy 2 HD/IT $3.5
Boy Erased HD/MA $4
Boy HD/IT $3.5
Boyhood HD/VU or IT $2.5
Braveheart HD/VU $3.5
Braven HD/VU $4
Breakfast Club HD/IT $4
Breakthrough HD/MA $3
Burnt HD/VU $3.5
Butler HD/VU $3
Bye Bye Man (Unrated) HD/IT $2.5
Cabin in Woods 4K/VU or IT $4.5 or HD/VU $2.5
Call of Wild 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $2.5
Captain America Civil War HD/GP $2.5
Captain America First Avenger HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Captain America Winter Soldier HD/GP $3.5
Captain Marvel HD/GP $2
Captain Phillips HD/MA $3.5
Carol HD/VU $4
Cars 3 HD/GP $2.5
Case for Christ HD/IT $2.5
Chaos Walking 4K/VU $5
Chicago (Diamond Edition) HD/VU $4
Children (2008) HD/VU $4
Christopher Robin HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Cloverfield 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Coco HD/GP $2.5
Cold Pursuit 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Collection HD/VU $3.5
Columbiana (Unrated) HD/MA $4
Come & Find Me HD/VU $4
Commuter 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Company of Heroes HD/MA $4
Contraband HD/IT $3
Cooties HD/VU $4
Cornetto Trilogy (Shaun of Dead, Hot Fuzz, World's End) 4K/MA $15
Counselor HD/MA $4
Courier 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Crank 4K/VU $5.5
Crawl HD/VU $3
Crimson Peak HD/IT $3.5
Croods HD/VU $3.5
Cruella HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
D Train 4K/IT $4
Daddy's Home 2 HD/IT $3
Daddy's Home HD/VU $3
Dark Tower HD/MA $3.5
Darkest Hour (2017) 4K/MA $5.5
Darkest Minds HD/MA $4
Darkness HD/IT $3
Dawn of Planet of Apes HD/MA $3.5
Daybreakers 4K/VU $5.5
Deadpool 2 (w/Super Duper Cut) HD/MA $4
Deadpool HD/MA $2.5
Dear White People HD/VU $3.5
Deepwater Horizon 4K/IT $3
Dementia 13 (Director's Cut) HD/VU $4
Despicable Me 2 HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Despicable Me 3 4K/MA or IT $5
Despicable Me 4K/IT $5
Detroit HD/MA $3.5
Devil's Due HD/MA $3.5
Dilemma HD/VU $3.5
Dirty Dancing 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Disney Animated Short Films Collection HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Divergent Allegiant HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Divergent HD/VU $1.5 or 4K/IT $2
Divergent Insurgent HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Django Unchained HD/VU $3
Do Right Thing 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
Doctor Strange HD/GP $2.5
Dom Hemingway HD/MA $3.5
Don't Worry, He Won't Get Far on Foot HD/VU $4
Doom (Unrated) 4K/MA $5.5
Doorman HD/VU $3.5
Doors 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Dora & Lost City of Gold HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Downton Abbey Movie HD/MA $3.5
Dracula Untold HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Draft Day HD/VU $3.5
Dragged Across Concrete HD/VU $3.5
Dreamkatcher HD/VU $4
Dredd 4K/VU or IT $4 or HD/VU $2.5
Duel (2016) HD/VU $3.5
Dumbo (2019) HD/GP $3
Dune 4K/MA $5.5
Dying of Light HD/VU $2.5
E.T. Extra Terrestrial 4K/VU or IT $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Edge of Seventeen HD/VU or IT $3
Edge of Tomorrow 4K/MA $5
Edward Scissorhands HD/MA $3.5
El Chicano HD/MA $4
Emoji Movie HD/MA $3
Encanto 4K/MA $4 or 4K/GP $3.5
Ender's Game HD/VU $2.5
Enemy at Gates HD/VU $4
Enough Said HD/MA $3.5
Epic HD/MA $3
Escape Plan HD/VU $2
Eternals HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Everest 4K/MA or IT $4.5
Ex Machina HD/VU $3
Exodus Gods & Kings HD/MA $3.5
Expendables 2 HD/VU or IT $1
Expendables 3 (Thea) HD/VU $2 or 4K/IT $2.5
Extreme Prejudice (1987) HD/VU $4
Fast & Furious (2009) HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Fast & Furious 6 (Ext) HD/VU $2 or 4K/IT $2.5
Fast & Furious 6-film Collection HD/VU $12.5
Fast & Furious 7-film Collection HD/VU $14
Fast & Furious 8-film Collection (9 Films) HD/MA $17.5
Fast & Furious 9-film Collection (11 Films) HD/MA $20
Fast & Furious HD/VU $3.5
Fast Color 4K/VU $5.5
Fast Five (Ext) HD/IT $2.5
Fatale (2020) 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Fate of Furious (Ext) HD/VU $2
Fate of Furious (Thea) HD/VU or IT $1.5
Fault in Our Stars HD/MA $3.5
Fences HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Ferdinand HD/MA $3.5
Fifty Shades Darker (Unrated) HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Fifty Shades Freed HD/MA $4
Fifty Shades of Grey (Unrated) HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Fighting with my Family HD/IT $4
Finding Dory HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Finding Nemo HD/GP $3.5
Finest Hours HD/GP $3
First Blood 4K/VU $5
First Man HD/MA $4
Flight HD/VU or IT $3
Florence Foster Jenkins HD/VU or IT $3
Footloose (2011) HD/IT $3
Forever My Girl HD/IT $3
Fortress HD/VU $4
Four Kids & It HD/VU $3.5
Fox & Hound 2 HD/MA $4
Frank & Lola HD/VU or IT $3
Frankenstein (1931) HD/VU $3.5
Free Guy HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
French Dispatch HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Friday 13th Pt 3 HD/VU $3.5
Frozen (Sing-Along Edition) HD/MA $2 or HD/GP $1.5
Frozen 2 4K/MA $4 or HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Frozen Ground (2013) HD/VU $3.5
Frozen HD/GP $2
Furious 7 (Ext) HD/VU $2 or 4K/IT $2.5
Fury HD/MA $3.5
G.I. Joe Retaliation HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Gambit (2012) HD/MA $4
Gambler HD/VU or IT $3
Gemini Man 4K/VU or IT $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Gentlemen 4K/IT $4.5
Get Out HD/MA $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Ghost in Shell (2017) 4K/VU or IT $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Ghost Team One HD/VU or IT $3.5
Ghostbusters (1984) HD/MA $3.5
Ghostbusters 2 HD/MA $3.5
Ghostbusters Afterlife HD/MA $4
Girl on Train HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Girl With All Gifts HD/VU $4
Girls Trip HD/VU or IT $2
Glass Castle 4K/VU $5.5
God's Not Dead 2 HD/MA or IT $2.5
God's Not Dead A Light in Darkness HD/MA $3
Gods of Egypt HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Gold (2016) HD/VU or IT $2.5
Gone Girl HD/MA $4
Good Dinosaur HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Good Kill HD/VU or IT $3.5
Grace Unplugged HD/VU $2
Greatest Showman HD/MA $3.5
Green Mile 4K/MA $5.5
Grey HD/VU or IT $3
Guardians of Galaxy Vol 1 HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Guardians of Galaxy Vol 2 HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Guest House (2020) 4K/VU $5
Guilt Trip HD/IT $3
Gunman HD/MA $3
Hacksaw Ridge HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Hail, Caesar! HD/IT $3
Halloween (2018) HD/MA $3
Hammer of Gods HD/VU $2
Hands of Stone HD/VU $3.5
Hannibal Season 1 HD/VU $5
Hard Target 2 HD/IT $1.5
Hardcore Henry HD/VU or IT $3.5
Hate U Give HD/MA $4
Hateful Eight HD/VU $3.5
Heat HD/MA $3
Hell Fest 4K/VU $5
Hell or High Water HD/VU $2.5
Hellboy (2019) 4K/VU $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Hercules (1997) HD/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $4
Hercules (2014) HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Here Comes Boom HD/MA $3.5
Hidden Figures HD/MA $3
Hillsong Let Hope Rise HD/IT $2
Hitman (Uncut) & Hitman 47 Bundle HD/MA $7
Hitman's Bodyguard HD/VU $3.5
Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Hocus Pocus HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Home Again HD/MA $3
Home Alone 2 HD/MA $3.5
Home Alone HD/MA $3.5
Homesman HD/VU $3
Honey 2 HD/VU $3
Hop HD/MA or IT $3
Hope Springs HD/MA $2.5
Hostiles 4K/VU $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Hot Fuzz HD/VU $4
Hotel Mumbai HD/MA $4
Hotel Transylvania HD/MA $3.5
Hours (2013) HD/VU $4
How Grinch Stole Christmas (2000) 4K/IT $4
How to Train Your Dragon 2 HD/MA $2.5
How to Train Your Dragon HD/VU $3.5
How to Train Your Dragon Trilogy HD/MA $9
Hugo HD/VU or IT $3
Hunger Games 4-Film Collection HD/VU $8
Hunger Games Catching Fire HD/VU $1.5 or 4K/IT $2
Hunger Games HD/VU $1.5 or 4K/IT $2
Hunger Games Mockingjay Part 1 HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Hunter Killer 4K/VU $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Huntsman Winter's War (Ext) HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
I Can Only Imagine HD/VU $4
I Feel Pretty HD/IT $2
I Frankenstein HD/VU or IT $2.5
Ice Age Collision Course HD/MA $3
Incredibles 2 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Incredibles HD/GP $3.5
Independence Day Resurgence HD/MA $2.5
Indiana Jones & Temple of Doom 4K/VU $5.5
Indignation HD/VU $4
Initiation 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Inside Out HD/GP $2
Instant Family 4K/IT $3.5
Interstellar HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Into Woods HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Invisible Man (1933) HD/MA $3.5
Invisible Man (2020) 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
Iron Man HD/GP $3.5 or HD/GP $2
Iron Mask (2019) HD/VU $4.5
It Follows HD/VU $3.5
It's a Wonderful Life 4K/VU or IT $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Jack Reacher HD/VU $3
Jack Reacher Never Go Back HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Jack Ryan Shadow Recruit HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Jacob's Ladder HD/VU $4
Jarhead 3 Siege (Unrated) HD/IT $2.5
Jason Bourne HD/VU $2.5
Jason Statham 4-Film (War, Crank 1 & 2, Transporter 3) HD/VU $10
Jaws 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Jeff Who Lives at Home HD/VU $4
Jersey Boys HD/MA $2.5
Jesus Music HD/VU $3.5
Jigsaw 4K/VU $4.5
Joe HD/VU $3.5
John Wick 1 & 2 Bundle HD/VU $4
John Wick 3 Parabellum 4K/VU $4.5
John Wick Chapter 2 HD/VU $3.5
John Wick HD/VU $2
John Wick Trilogy (Parabellum 4K) HD/VU $9
Jonah Hex HD/MA $4.5
Joy HD/MA $3
Judy 4K/VU $5
Jungle Book (2016) 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $2.5
Jungle Cruise HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Jurassic Park 3 HD/VU $3.5
Jurassic Park 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Jurassic World 5-Film Collection HD/MA $14
Jurassic World Fallen Kingdom 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/MA $3
Jurassic World HD/VU $2.5
Justice (2017) HD/VU or IT $3
Kevin Hart Let Me Explain HD/VU or IT $3
Kick-Ass 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Kid Who Would Be King 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
Kidnap HD/VU or IT $2.5
Killer Elite HD/IT $3
Killerman HD/VU $4
Kin (2018) 4K/VU $4.5 or HD/VU $3
King Kong (2005) 4K/MA or IT $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Kingsman Golden Circle 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/MA $3
Kingsman Secret Service 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Knick Season 1 HD/IT $3.5
Knick Season 2 HD/IT $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Kung Fu Panda 3 HD/MA $3
La La Land 4K/IT $3.5
Labor Day HD/VU or IT $3
Lady & Tramp HD/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $4
Lady Macbeth HD/VU $4.5
Last Christmas HD/MA $4
Last Exorcism HD/VU $4
Last Knights HD/VU $3.5
Last Man (2019) HD/VU $4
Last Stand HD/IT $2
Last Vegas HD/MA $3.5
Last Witch Hunter HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Leatherface HD/VU $4
Legend of Hercules 4K/IT $3
Leprechaun 7-Film Collection HD/VU $12
Les Miserables (2012) HD/VU or IT $2
Let Me Explain HD/IT $2.5
Let's be Cops HD/MA $3.5
Life (2017) HD/MA $3.5
Life of Crime HD/VU $3.5
Life of Pi 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA or IT $3.5
Light of My Life HD/IT $3.5
Like a Boss HD/VU $3.5
Lilo & Stitch 2 Stitch Has a Glitch HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Lilo & Stitch HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Lincoln Lawyer 4K/VU $6.5 or HD/VU $4
Lion King (1994) HD/GP $3
Lion King (2019) 4K/MA $4 or HD/GP $2
Logan HD/MA $3
Logan Lucky 4K/MA or IT $4.5
Lone Ranger HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Lone Survivor HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Long Shot HD/VU $3.5
Longest Ride HD/MA $3
Longest Week HD/VU $3.5
Looper HD/MA $3.5
Lorax (1972) HD/MA $5
Lorax HD/VU $3
Lords of Salem HD/VU $4
Lost World Jurassic Park HD/MA $3
Love & Monsters HD/VU $4
Love Coopers HD/VU or IT $4
Love, Simon HD/MA $3.5
Loving HD/VU or IT $3.5
Luca HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Lucy HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Mad Max 2 Road Warrior 4K/VU $5.5
Madagascar 3 Europe's Most Wanted HD/VU or IT $3
Magnificent Seven (2016) HD/VU $3
Maleficent 4K/MA $4 or HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Maleficent Mistress of Evil HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Mama HD/IT $3
Man Who Shot Liberty Vance 4K/VU $5.5
Mandela Long Walk to Freedom HD/VU $4
Martian HD/MA $3.5
Mary Poppins (1964) HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Mary Poppins Returns HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Matrix Resurrections 4K/MA $5.5
Max Steel HD/IT $3
Maze Runner Death Cure HD/MA $3.5
Maze Runner HD/MA $3.5
McKenna Shoots for Stars HD/IT $2
Mechanic Resurrection HD/VU $2.5
Megan Leavey HD/IT $3
Midnight Sun HD/MA $3.5
Midway 4K/VU $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Mile 22 HD/IT $3
Million Dollar Arm HD/GP $2.5
MindGamers HD/MA or IT $3.5
Minions 4K/MA or IT $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Misconduct HD/VU $2.5
Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children HD/MA $3
Missing Link HD/MA $4
Mission Impossible 3 4K/VU $4.5
Mission Impossible 4 Ghost Protocol HD/VU $2
Mission Impossible 5 Rogue Nation HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Mission Impossible 6 Fallout 4K/VU or IT $4.5
Mission Impossible 6-film Set 4K/VU $23 or HD/VU $17
Moana HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Moneyball HD/MA $3
Monkey Kingdom HD/MA $3
Monster High Electrified HD/VU or IT $2.5
Monsters University HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Monuments Men HD/MA $3.5
Mortal Engines 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
Mortal HD/VU $4
Mortal Instruments City of Bones HD/MA $3
Mother! HD/VU $2.5
Mother's Day HD/IT $2.5
Much Ado About Nothing (2013) HD/VU $4
Mud HD/VU $2.5
Mulan (2020) 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Mummy (1999) HD/VU $4
Mummy (2017) 4K/MA or IT $4.5
Muppets Most Wanted HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Murder on Orient Express HD/MA $3.5
My All American HD/MA or IT $3.5
My Fair Lady 4K/VU $5.5
Nebraska HD/VU $3
Nerve HD/IT $3.5
New Mutants HD/GP $3
News of World 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
Night at Museum Secret of Tomb HD/MA $3
Nightmare Alley 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/GP $3.5
Nightmare Before Christmas HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
No Escape (2015) HD/VU $3
No Strings Attached HD/VU or IT $3.5
No Time to Die 4K/IT $4.5
Noah HD/VU or IT $2.5
Nobody's Fool HD/IT $2.5
Non-Stop HD/VU or IT $3
Norm of North HD/VU $2.5
Nostalgia (2018) HD/MA $3.5
Now You See Me 2 HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Now You See Me HD/VU or IT $2.5
Nutcracker & Four Realms HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Oblivion 4K/MA or IT $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Occupation (2018) HD/VU $3.5
Occupation Rainfall HD/VU $4
Office Christmas Party HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Olaf's Frozen Adventure HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Ong Bak 2 HD/VU $3
Onward 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $2.5
Other Woman HD/MA $3
Ouija HD/IT $3.5
Ouija Origin of Evil HD/VU or IT $3.5
Outlander Season 1 Vol 1 HD/VU $5.5
Overdrive HD/IT $2.5
Overlord 4K/IT $3.5
Oz Great & Powerful HD/GP $2.5
Paddington HD/VU $3.5
Pain & Gain HD/VU or IT $3.5
Paranormal Activity 3 (Ext) HD/VU or IT $3
Paranormal Activity 4 (Unrated) HD/VU or IT $2.5
Paranormal Activity HD/VU $4
Paranormal Activity Marked Ones HD/VU or IT $3.5
Passengers HD/MA $3
Patriot Games 4K/VU $5
Patriot's Day HD/VU $3
Peanuts Movie HD/MA $3
Penguins of Madagascar HD/MA $3.5
Pet Sematary (2019) 4K/IT $3.5
Peter Pan (1953) HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Peter Rabbit HD/MA $3.5
Pete's Dragon (2016) HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Philomena HD/VU $2.5
Pinocchio (1940) HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Pirates of Caribbean Dead Men Tell No Tales 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $2.5
Pitch Black (Unrated) HD/MA or IT $4
Pitch Perfect 2 4K/MA $4 or HD/VU $2.5
Pitch Perfect HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Pixar Short Films Collection Vol. 3 HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Planes Fire & Rescue HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
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Playing with Fire HD/IT $2.5
Pocahontas 2 Journey to a New World HD/GP $3.5
Pocahontas HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Point Break (2015) 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Poison Rose 4K/VU $4.5
Pompeii HD/MA $3.5
Possession HD/VU or IT $2.5
Power Rangers (2017) 4K/VU or IT $4.5
Precious HD/VU $4.5
Predator (2018) HD/MA $3
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Premium Rush HD/MA $3.5
Pride & Prejudice & Zombies HD/MA $3.5
Primal HD/VU $3.5
Prodigy HD/VU $4
Project Almanac HD/IT $3.5
Protege HD/VU $4
Punisher 4K/VU $5.5
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Quarry 4K/VU $5
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Ralph Breaks Internet HD/GP $2
Rambo (2008) 4K/VU $5.5
Rambo 3 4K/VU $5.5
Rambo 5-Film Collection 4K/VU $23 or HD/VU $17
Rambo First Blood Pt 2 4K/VU $5.5
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Rango HD/VU $3.5
Raya & Last Dragon HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
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RED 2 HD/VU $2
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Resident Evil Retribution 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
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Ring HD/VU $4.5
Rings HD/VU or IT $2.5
Rio 2 HD/MA $3
Riot HD/VU or IT $3
RIPD HD/IT $2.5
Risen HD/MA $3
Robin Hood (1973) HD/MA $3.5
Robin Hood (2018) HD/VU $3
Robocop (2014) HD/VU $2.5
Rocketman (2019) 4K/IT $4
Rogue One A Star Wars Story HD/GP $2
Ron's Gone Wrong HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Rough Night 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Runner Runner HD/MA $3.5
Rush HD/VU or IT $3
Safe HD/VU or IT $2.5
Saige Paints Sky HD/IT $3
Same Kind of Different As Me HD/IT or IT $3
Samson HD/MA $3.5
Santa Clause 2 HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Santa Clause 3 HD/MA $3
Santa Clause HD/MA $3.5
Santa Clause Trilogy HD/MA $9.5 or HD/GP $8
Saving Mr. Banks HD/GP $3
Saw 7-Film Collection (Unrated) HD/VU $18
Saw 8-Film Collection HD/VU $20
Saw HD/VU $3
Scarface HD/VU $4
Scary Movie 5 HD/VU $4.5
Scary Stories to Tell in Dark 4K/VU $4.5
Schindler's List 4K/MA $5.5
Scouts Guide to Zombie Apocalypse HD/IT $3
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Sherlock Gnomes HD/VU or IT $2.5
She's Having a Baby HD/VU $3.5
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Show Dogs HD/MA $3.5
Siberia (2018) HD/VU $3
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Sicario HD/VU $2.5
Side Effects HD/IT $3.5
Sing (2016) 4K/IT $4
Singing in Rain 4K/MA $5.5
Sinister HD/IT $2.5
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Sixteen Candles HD/MA $4
Skyfall HD/VU $2.5
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Sleeping Beauty (1959) HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
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Snatched HD/MA $2
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Snow White & Huntsman (Ext Edition) 4K/VU or IT $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Snow White & Seven Dwarfs (1937) HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Solo A Star Wars Story HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Some Kind of Wonderful HD/VU $3.5
Songbird 4K/IT $4.5
Sonic Hedgehog 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Soul HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Southpaw HD/VU $3
Southside With You HD/VU $4.5
Spider-Man 4-Cut Set (Spider-Man 2 w/ Thea & Ext) HD/MA $11.5
Spider-Man Far From Home HD/MA $3.5
Spider-Man Homecoming HD/MA $3
Spider-Man Homecoming/Far From Home Bundle HD/MA $6
Spies in Disguise 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Spiral (2021) 4K/VU or IT $4.5
Split 4K/MA or IT $5
Split HD/MA $3.5
Spongebob Sponge out of Water HD/IT $2.5
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St. Vincent HD/VU $3
Stand Up Guys HD/VU $3.5
Star Trek (2009) HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Star Trek 1-4 (Motion Picture, Wrath of Khan, Search for Spock, Voyage Home) 4K/VU $18
Star Trek Beyond HD/VU $3
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Star Wars Last Jedi 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Star Wars Rise of Skywalker 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Step Up Revolution HD/IT $3
Sting 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Straight Outta Compton (Thea & Unrated) 4K/MA $4.5
Straight Outta Compton (Unrated) HD/MA $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Strangers Prey at Night HD/MA $3
Suburbicon HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Sudden Death HD/IT $4
Suits Season 2 HD/IT $3.5
Sum of All Fears 4K/VU $5.5
Sundown Vampire in Retreat HD/VU $3.5
Super 8 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Super Buddies HD/GP $2
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Taxi Driver HD/MA $4
Ted (Unrated) HD/IT $3
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014) HD/VU $2.5
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Terminator 2 Judgment Day (Ext) HD/VU $4.5
Terminator 2 Judgment Day HD/VU $3.5
Terminator Dark Fate 4K/VU or IT $4 or HD/VU $2.5
Terminator Genisys HD/VU $2.5
Thanks for Sharing HD/VU $4
This is 40 HD/MA $3.5
This is End HD/MA $3.5
Thor Dark World HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Thor HD/GP $3.5
Thor Ragnarok HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri HD/MA $3.5
To Kill a Mockingbird 4K/IT $4
Top Gun (1986) 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Total Recall (1990) HD/VU $3.5
Toy Story 4 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Toy Story HD/GP $3.5
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Transformers 4K/VU $5
Transformers Age of Extinction HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
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Trust HD/VU $4
Turbo HD/MA or IT $3
Turning HD/MA $4
Twilight Breaking Dawn 2 HD/VU $1.5 or 4K/IT
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Twilight HD/VU $4
Tyler Perry's Temptation HD/GP $3
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Unbroken HD/VU or IT $3
Uncle Drew HD/VU $3.5
Underworld Awakening HD/MA $3
Untouchables 4K/VU $5
Valerian & City of a Thousand Planets HD/VU $3.5
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Vanishing (2018) HD/VU $4
Veep Season 6 HD/IT $3.5
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Walk HD/MA $3.5
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Warcraft HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Warm Bodies 4K/VU $4.5 or HD/VU $3
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Werewolf Beast Among Us (Unrated) HD/IT $3.5
West Side Story 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
What Men Want HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
When Game Stands Tall HD/MA $3
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Wild Card HD/VU $3
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Wilson HD/MA $3.5
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Wolf of Wall Street HD/VU or IT $3.5
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XXX Return of Xander Cage HD/VU $2 or 4K/IT $2.5
You Were Never Really Here HD/VU $4
You're Next HD/VU $3.5
Z for Zachariah HD/VU $4
Zero Dark Thirty HD/MA $3.5
Zeros & Ones HD/VU $4.5
Zootopia HD/GP $2.5

ATP Singles

Jarry vs Ruud :

If you watched Geneva last week, you saw the scariest version of Nicolas Jarry that the tour has ever seen. He’s always been a dominant server, but his baseline game seems to have become consistent out of nowhere. That consistency hasn’t come at the expense of his aggressive shot selection either. Somehow, Jarry is ballin and it is a welcome sight.
At the same time that Jarry leveled up, Casper Ruud began finding his form again. He’s been such a consistent performer at times that when he loses, the whole conversation is about him. It all started with a lopsided loss to Shelton in Cincinnati last season. We now see that this is not so bad. He’s lost as a favorite against Daniel, Arnaldi, Struff, and Garin. These losses may seem like issues, but I think it’s just very difficult to maintain a high level on tour. Burnout is real, and we don’t always know the physical condition and motivation of the players. It’s a bit out of character for Ruud, because he has always taken a very professional approach to matches, but as he gets a few major finals and a number of 250 titles under his belt, the pressure of expectations fades. If he never wins another match, his legacy as top player on tour is already cemented. At this point, it’s entirely feasible that his team is looking to peak at the majors, since that would be the last big feather in his cap.
Ruud is playing near his best tennis this week, despite dropping a few sets on the way here. Zhizhen Zhang has become a mainstay on tour which is a pretty great transition from the Challenger level, but him winning a set against Ruud isn’t cause for alarm bells for me. Zhang has a very powerful serve and goes huge on his groundstrokes, so at times he’s just going to be unplayable, and more importantly he’s the type of opponent who is more dangerous on a big point. Jarry is going to bring a similar level of pressure and risk, and after winning in three heroic sets in Geneva he’ll be feeling confident here.
The market for this one opened with Ruud at -214, and it has gone all the way down to -173. I disagree. These are slower conditions, Jarry has played a lot of tennis in the past few weeks, and Ruud is playing well behind his forehand. Jarry’s backhand is more dangerous here, but it feels like a spot where he is even at best. Just considering that Ruud has been given a ton of footage to review with his team makes me think he might return a bit better, and the slower conditions mean the rapid fire baseline rallies they exchanged in Geneva (ultra fast conditions for clay) will be a bit more subdued. We’ve all seen these conditions lend the more stable player an edge as matches drag on, and I think that will be the case here. Jarry’s serve and power can’t be dismissed in straight sets, but I think that this will be an extreme physical test and that Ruud’s ability to create off his forehand will be very useful once both players are tired. Ruud in 5.

Rune vs Cerundolo :

Rune had a simple match against a very similar but weaker player, and he made it look easy. Olivieri couldn’t really get anything going, and Rune was able to remain neutral in rallies until he got a full swing. Once he did, it was usually only 2-3 shots before the point was over. Him being so technically sound makes it really hard for players without a big offense to beat him. It just becomes a matter of whether Rune will put in the work, and his strength and conditioning are very good, and his energy levels are Space Jam stuff at times. Here he has a difficult task, but one I think he can handle. These two met in 2019, with Cerundolo winning in straights. They are two entirely different players now though, and it’s Rune who looks much sharper now.
Cerundolo had a tough test in Taylor Fritz, but I thought fatigue would be the way he lost. He seemed fresh throughout, and that made life very difficult on Fritz. I don’t love Taylor’s demeanor on court when he’s losing, he’s very emotive and complains about the conditions and bad bounces and overall it just gives a lot of belief to an opponent. If you are easily moved by emotions, it’s better to sort of hold it together until it bubbles over. One, because it will gradually let you practice not being so reactive. Two, because a real big rageout scream or racquet smash can change momentum and rattle an opponent. It’s not classy, but when you’re already losing, anything that changes the feel of the match in the court has potential to help. Whining does very little, and the crowd in Paris is not a big fan of that at all. The crowd was fairly respectful, and Fritz’s shushing from his match against Rinderknech did not seem to be an issue with them. McEnroe remarked that most of the fans were probably unfamiliar with Fritz, which is actually absurd, but standard.
The Tennis Channel team does not seem to actively follow the tour, and their view of things is almost always a bit reductive and puzzling. McEnroe also did not seem to know that they had changed the balls this year, and honestly I wind up muting tennis audio far too often because of announcers. It makes it really refreshing actually to hear Gil Gross working a match. Is this an article about Gil Gross? Maybe. Gross seems like a kid who would insist on telling me that baby carrots are actually made from full-sized carrots, but the effort he puts into analyzing tennis and respecting the game is much appreciated. He actually was mid-sentence and said “and I’ll hold that thought because play is about to resume.” What? Unheard of. Announcers not talking over the rallies? Announcers not telling us exactly what we just saw? Announcers teaching us about tennis technique and matchup issues? Announcers not … talking … with weird pauses … because they think … that’s what announcers do? Announcers not leaving out half their sentences because they think we’re listening along to their internal monologue? Announcers who are familiar with the players on tour outside the top 100? Wow. Just wow. Anyway, Gil seems like he’d be fun to do a puzzle with, and I’m glad that he’s getting somewhere in the tennis world because he really seems like a fan of the game.
I don’t think Cerundolo can win this match. Against Fritz, he dominated things behind his dropshot and forehand. Fritz moves forward poorly on clay, something I honestly didn’t realize. He won nearly no rallies where Cerundolo used it. At the same time, he couldn’t get to Cerundolo’s forehand, so what was he covering? The reason he fell victim to both these balls is because he had zero variation on his backhand. Usually when I’m griping about Fritz, I exaggerate a bit, but I don’t think I saw him hit one backhand up the line during a neutral rally. He just kept trying to infuse a little bit of depth and height cross-court, but it became predictable very early on. The backhand up the line is bad because it opens up the cross-court forehand for Cerundolo, but you still have to hit it a good enough chunk of the time to keep your opponent from camping in the backhand corner, which is what Francisco did for the entire match. This just won’t be an option against Rune, because he has a way better backhand than Fritz, and because he has the speed to run down dropshots. He’s also a clay specialist in terms of his background, so he’ll be comfortable in long rallies where Taylor wasn’t.
I think Cerundolo is the Fritz in this matchup, because he has a ton of power but I think he has to look to score all his own points. Rune is fresh, and won’t give him many unforced errors. This should be a very close match in terms of the scoreline, but I think Rune’s speed and stability get him through here. Rune in 4.

Etcheverry vs Nishioka :

Nishioka and Seyboth Wild put on a great show. The Brazilian phenom ran out of gas, but he really gave us a ton of excitement in the first week of this event. For Yoshihito, these points are incredibly useful. He doesn’t have many clay points from last season at all, so this gives him a good chance to improve his ranking in the hardcourt season where he’s sure to win a handful of matches in the hot conditions. I usually find myself talking about what a great result people are having once their tournament is over, and I do think this is Nishioka’s last round. He’s been winning by outlasting his opponent, and there does not seem to be an end to Etcheverry. Coric and Etcheverry were expected to play an exhausting contest, and they did. The difference in power was clear from the start though. Etcheverry plays like a baseliner but he’s 6‘5” and he is really crushing the ball at this tournament. Coric hung tough, but he just couldn’t get a ball by him.
Etcheverry will need to be patient in this match, but I think he can break down Nishioka’s forehand. The loopy returns work well against shorter players, but Etcheverry should be able to lean into them since he’s a bit taller. His edge on serving is also huge, his delivery was a big key in keeping him fresh while Coric struggled to hold serve without putting in a ton of work. Nishioka is crushing his backhand, and that flat pace could prove a bit tough for the taller player, but I don’t see it winning him the match. Overall, I just think these guys have been competing in two different weight classes thus far, and Etcheverry is the pick. Etcheverry in 3-4.

Dimitrov vs Zverev :

Dimitrov is the ultimate trickster. Just when we think he’s too injury prone or too Dimitrov to be a threat on tour, he breaks out his best tennis. He’s been lights out this week, dismissing contenders in good form in a way that throughout most of his career he has never done. This is probably his best chance to beat Zverev, but the last 3 matches have gone Zverev’s way. If I had to guess, it’s because Zverev’s backhand is so stable. He doesn’t really go for a lot with it most of the time, and that means against Dimitrov’s slice he’s completely safe. If we eliminate danger on one wing entirely, then it’s forehands and serves. Zverev’s serve has double fault issues, and his location is poor, but he has a ton of power and returning it is easier said than done. Dimitrov has a huge edge on the forehand here, and he’s using that remarkably well this week.
It’s hard to watch Zverev play and think he’s going to beat Dimitrov. Him and Tiafoe played a solid match, and Tiafoe is a great player, but it wasn’t high quality stuff. The rallies seemed slow, both players seemed to be concentrating (and unfortunately not concentrating) on technique and on hitting the court. The wind and slower conditions just made the game seem slow, and I think the pace ended up frustrating Tiafoe into errors. Dimitrov has the ability to infuse pace off both wings and he’s been doing so this week. It’s the sort of match that I think Zverev is at risk of becoming frozen in. If Dimitrov can get the first set, I think he can win. Grigor has proven to be a dangerous frontrunner this week, and Zverev can get a little deer-in-the-headlights if he’s behind in the scoreline or if his serve isn’t working. I do think Zverev has been a bit more aggressive since his return from injury, so this should be pretty even in my eyes. In classic Dimitrov prankster style though, he has me thinking he’s going to win. Dimitrov in 4-5.

WTA Singles

Swiatek vs Tsurenko :

Ok Iga. I see that you are reading these. After predicting that Wang’s power and offense would get her 6 games, Swiatek chose to deny her a single game. I don’t think I’ve seen this type of blowout tennis ever. 0 games, to someone who beat a solid mid-tier tour player in Peterson. It makes my job easy here, because who can possible beat Swiatek? Rybakina is out of the tournament, everyone else is having to work extremely hard to win their matches, and Swiatek is going to be completely fresh for the quarterfinals. She has a tricky opponent here, because Tsurenko has beaten Krejcikova and Andreescu, but what does it matter? We are left wondering how many games Tsurenko can win, and if we have time to make a sammich and still make it back in time to catch the first set.
Tsurenko is very solid, and moves the ball well. Picture an Alize Cornet with a little more power and a bit less physicality. She’ll be a good opponent for Swiatek because there’ll be fewer unforced errors than Wang made, but it feels like Swiatek is not going to lose to her own errors and Tsurenko can’t serve well enough to hold onto any leads she may get. Swiatek in 2, with Tsurenko winning 4-5 games.

Sorribes Tormo vs Haddad Maia :

Puzzling line on this one as Sorribes Tormo is at just +120 for the match. I expected something more like +160. SST has been given a walkover after Rybakina withdrew with an illness. Haddad Maia had to play an extra match and it was a war with Alexandrova that she barely won, but I think she’s more well equipped to score in this matchup. Tormo has every shot in the book, and will extend rallies, but her serve isn’t as strong as Haddad Maia’s, and she doesn’t really hit the ball hard enough to get through the court. I’m guessing I don’t see something here, as SST has won the last few matches between the pair, and they’re ranked 120 spots apart so there’s a matchup issue I’m not seeing. Very hesitant to go with my gut on this one, but Haddad Maia has the defensive ability to hang even with Sorribes Tormo, and I think her forehand will give her the ability to create as the match drags on. Haddad Maia in 3.

Schmiedlova vs Gauff :

There have been a lot of matches this week where things were decided early. Both players seem very willing to engage in extended baseline rallies in the early going, but as one player proves slightly more resilient, their opponents have slowly deviated into trying to generate offense on more and more shots. This might be a decent plan B on hardcourt, but it’s near impossible on clay. If you could just smoke the ball and create angles and hit through the court, you’d be doing it as plan A, and you’d be a top 5 player. As it happened today, Kayla Day turned towards forcing things a bit. Schmiedlova was very steady to start the match and she hits a bit bigger than Day, so it wasn’t the worst choice, but it resulted in the scoreline getting out of hand quickly. In the second, Day made some progress and broke back a few times, but she couldn’t get ahead in rallies and that makes holding serve in the WTA very difficult because almost everyone on tour is tremendous returner.
Gauff had a ridiculously tough test in round one. Mirra Andreeva is so technically sound at such a young age. She really was slightly better in the first set because of it. Gauff made a few neutral ball errors that Andreeva just didn’t. It was clear though that Gauff was the bigger hitter. After winning the first in a thrilling tiebreak, Gauff was a bit looser. Having the pressure of the lead gone can be tough, but it also lets you swing freer. It became clear that Andreeva couldn’t hit through Gauff, and the match became a lopsided affair. This is the big hallmark of Gauff’s game, improving as the match goes on. Her training is great to be so strong physically, and her backhand, when she lets it fly, is a laser. If you let the ball get above her elbow height, she’s likely to just hit a clean winner. This next match is tricky because it’ll take a long time, but Gauff should be slightly stronger again. Schmiedlova has been playing solid tennis but she’s been the bigger hitter in most of the matches, and here it’s even. Expecting Gauff to win in two close sets.

Pera vs Jabeur :

This is a career changing run from Bernarda Pera. The clay ELO is proving accurate here, as she was able to outlast Elisabetta Cocciaretto in a wildly thrilling match. In the end, she was just a little more able to win short points, and her forehand cross is proving to be a big weapon when she’s on her game. It’s a big ask for her to beat Jabeur with that shot, especially since Ons has just gotten some invaluable training against another lefty. Olga Danilovic managed to push things to a third, but the problem with winning behind a big offense on clay becomes clear in a third. Jabeur has a ton of power and experience, and she’s fairing well this week. I do think that if Danilovic can win a set, Pera should be able to, but thus far Pera has been the bigger hitter in her matches and I’m curious to see how she trades power with Jabeur. She’ll have a bit of confidence at least, since she won their previous hardcourt meeting (too many seasons ago to be completely relevant) in straight sets. I just think Jabeur will be able to rush Pera and it will make all the difference. Jabeur in 2.

We spent six nights in New Orleans. Originally, we booked the Marriott off of Canal but had issues (broken toilet and no additional rooms) and thankfully was able to move across the street to the JW Marriott. It was so much nicer, newer and cleaner (thanks chase!)
Breakfast: Bearcat CBD: Really delicious. Had the cat daddy and the blue crab omelet. Great coffee. ~30 min wait but worth it
Willa Jean: Also very delicious. Had the crawfish roll and shrimp and grits. Lots of crawfish. If I had to nitpick, the shrimp was a little overcooked but still tasty
Beignets (fav to least fav order) 1. Cafe du Monde (French market): crispy, good texture, airy but not too airy, great ratio of powder sugar to beignet. This is what I think of when I think of a beignet. However, I would say the fry is inconsistent. You don’t always get crispy.

1. Loretta’s: I’d describe this more as a toaster strudel style beignet. It’s more flaky. Delicious and crispy. It gets the 2nd spot bc when I think of beignet, I don’t expect flaky.
   
2. Marriot Lounge: This was our dark horse. It was a random beignet we ate in the buffet lounge our first morning. We didn’t even take a picture. It scared us bc we had quite a few beignet duds for the first few days and thought this was our favorite for awhile. Good representation of a pillowy beignet. The sugar to beignet ratio was good. Missing some crispiness.
   
3. Cafe du Monde City Park: We may have gotten a bad batch. Kinda denser and larger holes to the point where there was not much inside. Nice crispy crust though.
   
4. Criollo at the hotel Monteleone:This was another toaster strudel type of beignet. Good but not crispy like Loretta’s.
   
5. Cafe beignet Royal St: this is another example of a pillowy beignet but too much dough to sugar ratio. Tighter crumb. Didn’t feel like eating more than 1.
   
6. The Vintage: I really was looking forward to this one. We may have gotten a bad batch, but it was literally empty inside. Like a shell of a beignet. It was a nice crispy crust though. Maybe would have been better to get a filled one.
   

Mains Willie Chicken Shack: ate this the first night since our flight was delayed. Freshly fried. Really great for late night.
Felix Lakefront: grilled oysters were good. We got a cup of gumbo and it was fine but forgettable.
High Hat: We ate here bc it was near cure. Really delicious. The gulf shrimp was one of our favorite bites from our trip. They make a good pie too.
Cochon: the bread and the sauce from the wood fired oysters was one of our top bites. Oysters themselves lacked some smoky flavor and were a bit overcooked.
Dakar: we went for Wednesday family night. Delicious seafood. Loved it. Went to second vine wine before dinner and they recommended us a great bottle of chenin blanc.
Compere Lapin: I love top chef and Nina but was a bit disappointed. We had to send back the tuna tartare bc it was too salty. I think they cure it. The second one was not much better and lacking acidity. Pig ears were also too salty. Pork belly and fried chicken with coconut grits were great. Could have used some heat. I found the pasta a little fishy but cooked well.
Gris gris: shrimp and grits were delicious. Whole red fish was ok, lacked seasoning, tomato sauce tasted like it came straight from the can. Great espresso martini.
Drinks: Jewel of the south: kinda hit or miss. Drinks were maybe overly complex where it just tasted like a good punch.
Cure: this was our favorite. Interesting and innovative cocktails but also delicious. Would go back.
French 75 bar: had a French 75 and matcha colada. It was good but nothing to write home about.
For gin fizz, we went to bar tonique and bourbon o bar. Bar tonique was better.
Overall, had an amazing trip. We had 120+ bookmarks and only made a small dent. We at so much good food, and loved walking and exploring. This was mostly a food post but just wanted to mention that city park was amazing. The sculpture garden is so good. Can’t wait to come back.

Alright I'm not gonna exaggerate and make my fiancee sound like she's legit trying to be a manly man-girl. She does work out, she has some muscles, but not Arnold Schwarzenegger muscles, she likes to wear hoodies when cold, Calvin Klein sports bra/tanktop when hot, and she is taller than me, almost towers my dad. But she has long dark hair, looks beautiful in whatever dress she wears. She is still a lady. And always will be. With that being said, whenever she gets angry Belle becomes Beast. I don't want you guys to think I'm constantly being harrassed or bullied like some soap opera but on occasions there are times when you come across someone who just feels like tearing you down for no other reason except, they fucking felt like it. I think I may have told this story in comments but here's a recap. Fiancee and I went to the gym, and because I don't exercise that often I just stick to the treadmill, planks, and spot my girl when she's lifting weights. Anyway, I'm on the treadmill listening to a video when some anorexic chick comes up to the treadmill, leans against it and attempts to make small talk with me. I say hi, trying to be as polite as I could even though I couldn't really hear because I had my headphones on. Then I see my girl confronting her, this serious look on her face, the skinny girl backing away like she had a gun infront of her then ran out the building. Apparently the girl was trying to flirt with me and not only is it against the rules at the gym to flirt(applies to guys and girls) but I'm my girl's man. No one should be flirting with me unless they are immune to being bashed in the head lol. So here's another story, this was last year so she was still just my girlfriend before we got engaged so just know I'm mentioning the same significant other. My girlfriend and I are getting ready to get on a plane to Florida, we were going to visit Weeki Waaci (a mermaid water park) then DisneyWorld because it was a rough week, we, or I needed a vacation. We're walking through the airport, once again we're dealing with who should carry the luggage. Most of it is our clothes. The other suitcase has personal stuff like her business laptop, books. And my Cheshire Cat themed bag she got me for my birthday with a couple of notebooks and my phone, charger cord, headphones. This isn't a legit full blown argument but it usually consists of her being, "No, honeybunny, only I should carry the stuff, you just bring your beautiful face"(She would say the loving yet cheesiest shit ever lol) and me going, "Babe it's not fair for you to carry everything, let me carry something otherwise I feel like an asshole." "Nope. I will not put my little prince through such labor" "Can I at least carry my Cheshire Cat bag. Its light." "Actually hon can you carry the Chesire Cat bag?" "If you insist babygirl." Y'all probably thinking "You're exaggerating because this is the rolereversal subreddit" but I'm not lol. This legit is what I experience 24/7 with this goofball. God I love her. Anyway so we arrive at our gate. We have at least one hour before we board so we have time to sit and chill. I am very uneasy on flights so I take an advil and tylenol pill(half of a tylenol because I don't wanna be drowsy) so it'll calm my nerves. My girlfriend grabs me tea from a nearby McDonald's, sit me on her lap, I swallow them down and so we kill an hour snuggling on the seat. "Flight blah blah bloo to Orlando Florida now boarding". We get our stuff ready, girlfriend hands me my ticket, window seat😁, and we get in line. So we're just standing around waiting for our turn, when this dude (I gave him the name, Mr. Obnoxious Cougher)stands next to us and he starts coughing. I understand that we have the vaccine now so the idea of maybe getting stick shouldn't be as risky as it would've been back in 2020. But guys, please understand, we are taught in kindergarten to cover our mouths when our bodies. releases bodily fluids like salvia or snot. Its fucking common curtsey. This 40 something year old is coughing like he's auditioning for "Cough The Musical". He is just doing the complete most. I start distancing myself from him but, and I shit you not, he came closer. "What the hell?" It went from a dude having a genuine respiratory issue to doing it on purpose to be obnoxious. He looks forty but hes standing there with his mouth open, coughing like a two year old. So my girlfriend and I just chatting trying to ignore him. I noticed a dude ahead of us with these sweet look shoes. They were Nikes, black bottom, and metallic top. They looked sick. "Hey do you think you could get me those?" "Yeah babe just remind me later" "Yeah yeah. Damn they look beautiful." Suddenly as if I feel like someone had sprayed windex in my direction this guy starts coughing in my face. I was freaking livid. "Yo what the fuck?" "Oh sorry." He was standing little inches away from me and coughing right into my face. I actually began to angry cry(you know when you get so mad tears start falling but you're not necessarily sobbing) a millisecond later my girlfriend rushes at Mr. Cougher and actually pins him to the wall, her arm squeezing his throat. She's shouting loud enough for everyone to hear. "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING YOU DISGUSTING PIECE OF COW FODDER?!" "S-s-sorry I'm ha-ha-having trouble breath-" "I DON'T GIVE A FUCK IF YOU'RE CHOKING ON YOUR BLOOD! COVER YOUR MOUTH! YOU DON'T COUGH ON NOBODY LIKE SOME DAMN 2 YEAR OLD!!" I'm just standing there, wiping my face, almost no reaction while everyone else is like😮😲😬😳 "IF YOU EVER DO THAT CRAP AGAIN, YOU BETTER PRAY TO CHRIST YOU'RE NOT ON THE SAME FLIGHT OR I WILL BREAK YOUR NECK!!" She let's him go as his face was starting to turn blue then returned to her place in line beside me. But not before giving the dude a nice knee to the crotch sending him down to the floor. Yeah, she does have a real short temper and was once attending anger management classes before she and I met. But she never gets angry at me because I'm the prince in the relationship. That and I'm fairly easy going so we don't have so different of opinions that we'd get into an argument (Yes I'm aware that its healthy to have arguments we are our own person, different perspectives and ideas, I'm just saying I'm not the type of person who is eager to convince everyone that their way deserves more of a look into)unless you count the luggage lol. The only time I remember her being actually irritated with me is one time we went shopping and I would constantly let go of her hand just to rile her up. But thats a story for another time. For those who go to airports you know how they separate lines, right, "Now boarding line 1-5, now boarding line 1-5." We're in line 5-9 they now announce our line and we board our plane. My girl has a very successful career so I've only flown first class since having this girl in my life, hell yeah. So we get to our seat, I managed to snatch her carry on bags, and with speed lifted them into the cabinets above our seats before she was able to react. I had a look of triumph on my face as I took my seat near the window, meanwhile she had a slightly annoyed look on her face. Guess I have a lot to learn about being a little prince lol. So we get comfortable, we fasten our seatbelts and await for the plane to fill up. The armtray between our seats is moveable, so my girlfriend lifted it and put her arm around me as she usually does incase there are times I get anxious and need a snuggle. I nuzzled into her chest, her arms wrapped around me and whispered, "My hero." since earlier and rewarded my maiden in shining armor with a kiss. The plane fills up and we're basically ready to get this bird across the runway. Until we see a stewardess and a familiar face beside her, its Mr. Obnoxious Cougher. "Attention passengers, our flight is full and we're looking for volunteers who'd willingly give up their seats and be bumped to a later flight for 200 dollars" Ironic enough we were flying American Airlines. If this was Spirits I'd wind up like that doctor. No one moved. In general my girlfriend and I wouldn't be the first people to give up seats because, why ruin our trip because of someone else's problems? But because of what happened earlier with this person, there was no pity in my eyes. I was just chilling, snuggling with my girlfriend, but something told me that she was looking at the dude with fire in her eyes. It was unanimous that no one was moving so the stewardess had to escort Cougher out. Everyone could literally hear him throwing an absolute tantrum as he walked back down to terminal. He was swearing and screaming just running his mouth. It was quite amusing. The pilot went over the safety instructions, I turned on an inflight movie, and we relaxed as our flight got ready to take off. It wouldn't be the last time my girl had to bust some heads in order to make sure I was good and safe and God bless her for it. She's like my big sister, my best friend, girlfriend and now fiancee and I can't wait to spend time rest of my life with her.

The Dwarves would have the same weight as Samus, two jumps and no special movement options.
Gimmick
The Dwarves would be able to swap between them, each one having different Special moves.
This would happen when you hold shield and the special button, a wheel will appear with the option to choose from any of the classes: top left-Gunner, top right-Scout, bottom left-Engineer and bottom right-Driller.
They will also have an ammo bar for the specials that is shared for everyone.
Basic Attacks
Jab-DRG’s jab would be similar to Steve’s where they can still move while using it, they would swing their pickaxe in a downwards motion stopping right in front of them doing good damage and knockback like Ganon’s jab.
F-Tilt-The Dwarves would take out Engineer’s Warthog and do a simple blast forward.
D-Tilt-They would use Driller’s Plasma Charger and shoot at the ground making a small explosion.
U-Tilt-For the up tilt the Dwarves would throw a flare high over their shoulder.
F-Smash- The Dwarfs would do a Power Attack in front of them with their pickaxe.
D-Smash-They would use Scout’s Zhukov NUK17 and shoot both sides at the same time making it a multihit.
U-Smash-DRG would use the Bulldog and shoot directly upwards.
Nair-They would use the CRSPR Flamethrower and shoot around them.
Fair-It would be a classic downwards swing with the pickaxe.
Bair-The Dwarves would use the Boomstick shooting backwards doing huge knockback and even pushing the player due to the recoil.
Dair-The Dwarves would be encased in a Personal Drop Pod and go straight down, spiking all the way.
Uair-DRG would use the Stubby and shoot up while moving it slightly side to side.
Grabs
The Dwarves would grab with one hand and pummel with the handle of the pickaxe. Throws will also regenerate a small portion of ammo.
F-Throw-For the forward throw they would simply shoot the opponent in the face with the Subata.
B-Throw-The Dwarves would push the foe behind them and then shoot him with the Flare Gun in the belly.
D-Throw-They would pin the enemy down and then a resupply pod would fall on top of him. This one regenerates all ammo.
U-Throw-DRG would throw them upwards and then use the Lead Storm to continuously shoot the foe upwards.
Specials
N-Special:The neutral specials are gonna be about the Dwarfs shooting their guns while also being able to aim them. They will have to reload the weapons which makes them stay still and vulnerable.
Gunner-The Gunner would use the Thunderhead, the gun will speed up with time and will create a small explosion on impact with anything. It has 110 bullets and takes 5 seconds to reload.(440 max ammo)
Scout-The Scout will use the M1000 that will charge up if you don’t shoot it immediately. It has 8 bullets and reloads in 2 seconds.(96 max ammo)
Engineer-The Engineer will use the Breach Cutter that will shoot out big horizontal plasma blades that do a bit of multi hitting before launching the opponent. It has 3 bullets before reloading, taking 3 seconds to do so.(12 max ammo)
Driller-The Driller will use the Corrosive Sludge Pump shooting slime balls that do damage, slow enemies and if they hit the ground, they will make a puddle. It has 20 bullets and reloads in 3 seconds.(120 max ammo)
F-Special:The forward specials are gonna be about the throwables.Each class has 4 throwables each.
Gunner-The Gunner will throw a Cluster Grenade that will divide into 9 other bomblets that will explode on impact with anything.
Scout-The Scout will throw his Voltaic Stun Sweeper which will stun any opponent it hits and bounce to any targets that are nearby and then break, if it doesn’t hit anyone it will return to the Scout.
Engineer-The Engineer will throw a Shredder Swarm that on impact will burst into 5 Shredders that will go after any foe and deal damage and knockback, breaking in the process.
Driller-The Driller would throw an Impact Axe that will do high damage and knockback to anyone it touches.
D-Special:The down specials are gonna be about the utility items with the exception of the Scout.
Gunner-The Gunner will put down a Shield Generator that will block projectiles and if any enemy enters the bubble they will start taking damage and their damage will be reduced.(4 max ammo)
Scout-The Scout will throw an Inhibitor-Field Generator, if any foe gets hit by the IFG’s explosion they will be slowed for 10 seconds.(4 max ammo)
Engineer-The Engineer would make an LMG Gun Platform that after 4 seconds will be ready to shoot. It will shoot 3 bullets per second, have a 90 bullet magazine, when it’s empty it will need the Engineer to reload it taking 2 seconds to do so.(425 max ammo)
Driller-The Driller will throw out a Satchel Charge, if he uses it again it will explode doing high damage and knockback.(2 max ammo)
U-Special:The up specials are gonna be about the movement items.
Gunner-The Gunner will use a Zipline Launcher that will shoot directly at the nearest ledge and slowly carry the gunner to the other side. The Gunner can still act while on the zipline but only doing aerials and specials. Other players can use the zipline by simply jumping on top of it and they will be automatically attached. The zipline will have a 1.5 second reload that will only start when any of the classes reaches the destination. (3 max ammo)
Scout-The Scout will use his Grappling Hook as a tether recovery with a 4 second cooldown.(Infinite ammo)
Engineer-The Engineer will use his Platform Gun and shoot 4 times once below him and the other 3 in the direction of the nearest ledge, these will act like normal platforms that anyone can use and it will have a 2 second reload.(16 max ammo)
Driller-The Driller will use the Reinforced Power Drills which will drill through a small tunnel around him for 3 seconds using 8 ammo. If he arrives at the stage it will take him 8 seconds until he can use them again. When he hits an opponent it will become a multi hit and last an extra second launching the opponent when he overloads(the time runs out).(38 max ammo)
Final Smash
DRG’s final smash will begin with the Drop Pod coming from above, any opponent hit by it will be transitioned into a cutscene where they are in Hoxxes getting mauled by Glyphids, Rockpox meteors and Rival tech weaponry such as the Nemesis. After all that they will come back to the stage and be either launched or killed if at 80% or higher.
Cosmetic Stuff
DRG will enter the stage by arriving in a Drop Pod.
Taunts:
U-Taunt-For the up-taunt Bosco will appear and salute at the current Dwarve as they yell one of the many variants of “Rock and Stone!”
D-Taunt-The Dwarves will all surround a Compressed Gold chunk pointing at it with their Laser Pointers and yelling “We're rich!”
S-Taunt-For the side-taunt Molly will show up and the Dwarve will deposit some minerals.
Victory Screens:
1st-The Dwarves will all show up and cheer as they chug down some Glyphid Slammers.
2nd-The Dwarves will all stand around and dance like they do when the jukebox is turned on.
3rd-The Dwarves will yell “Rock and Stone!” and then stand in any of the default victory poses.
Costumes:
1st-The default costumes.
2nd-The Roughneck pack clothes.
3rd-The Biohazard Pack clothes.
4th-The Robot Rebellion clothes.
5th-The Dark Future clothes.
6th-The Dawn of the Dread clothes.
7th-The Supporter Upgrade clothes.
8th-The Supporter Upgrade II clothes.
Thank you for reading!
If you have any questions please do tell me.

Hi, everyone! I started modding the game, and my idea is to put every tower into the first game (and later into KRF and KRO) as an upgrade of the base ones. On top of adding the towers, I'm also rebalacing some of the existing ones as an attempt to make every tower more viable and attractive, giving real choices for the player in how they want to tackle the levels.
So, the first thing I'm doing is to make the special towers available as upgraded versions of the normal ones. Bellow I put the existing towers and their rebalancing and the special ones, with an indication of their cost, what type of tower it would be, their upgrades and what was my reasoning behind the choices I did. I would like some input from you guys about the balancing aspect of it, and any ideas you may have about the towers that I haven't introduced into the mod yet.
Just a note, I tested out all this changes using placeholders and fiddling with the files of the game, since I'm still trying to figure out how to implement the actual models of the other games into the first one (I'm relative new to modding, so that's why).
​
-Holy Order: the only change I made to this tower is to the "Shield of Valor" skill, that now gives the Paladin's a damage reflection chance, similar to Gerald Lightseeker, but with half of the proc chance at maximum level. Because of that, I also upgraded the Paladin's baseline Armor value to 75% total (with the upgrades from the skill tree). So, they are still the tanky option, with some magical AoE and self-healing.
*Shield of Valor (Cost: 150/150/150): give the Paladins 10%/20%/30% chance to reflect the damage recieved as True Damage.
​
-Barbarian Mead Hall: I gave some changes to the Barbarians to make them a more damaging option, while incresing their survivability to allow them to do so. This way, they are a good choice for chokepoints against multiple weak enemies, but will die quickly to ranged damage and any high damaging enemy. Their base HP was increased by 100 (to 350) and their base damage to 22-30 (52-60 with More Axes at maximum level). Also, the cost of their upgrades are significantly cheaper.
*Throwing Axes (Cost adjusted to 150/100/100): now deals the Barbarian base damage on the ranged attack. The first upgrade allows them to use their ranged attack, the other two increase the Attack Speed of the ranged attack by 20/40% respectivelly.
*Whirlwind Attack: now also applies the Barbarian base damage to it's AoE attack and have the chance increase from 15/20/25 to 15/30/45%.
*More Axes (Cost adjusted to 120/120/120): same effect, applying a +10 damage to each upgrade.
​
The new Special Barracks added (note that the Sylvan Elf Hall, Awok Hut and Renegade Post will be considered a Special Elven Barrack type, which will be different from the basic barrack since it has the hybryd melee/ranged aspect to it).
-Sasquatch: this Barrack units will be similar to the Swamp Thing from KRV, in being a single unit that is very powerfull and durable. To counterbalance the fact it can only block one unit, it will have some CC options to help it in chokepoint. Best used alongside other barrack/units.
Cost 230 Gold. Sasquatch HP: 2500. Attack: 50-110 (small AoE slam dealing damage to all enemies nearby) with a 2,5 second attack rate. 20 second Respawn. No armor. 250 HP regen when idle. Rally range is double of the normal Barrack.
*Fresh Meat (Cost 100/80/80): each time the Sasquatch kills an enemy it regenerates 20%/30%/40% of it's maximum HP.
*Smash (Cost 200/150/150): Sasquatch have a 20/40/60% chance of stunning all enemies hit by it's attacks for 1/2/3 seconds.
*Fearsome Roar (Cost 180/150/150): nearby enemies run for their lives, going back the path for 2/4/6 seconds. 16 seconds CD.
​
-Dwarf Hall: remains very similar to how it appeared in KRF, with some rebalancing to make it better when tanking against a lot of ranged units, while also having some CC in their kit, making them different from the Paladins, while still being a tanky option to the Barracks with some self-healing as well.
Cost 230 Gold. Dwarf Warrior HP 220. Attack 12-18 (21-27 at maximum Mithril Hammer upgrade) with a 1,25 attack rate. 15 second Respawn. 20% Armor baseline (40% with maximum Mithril Armor upgrade). Same regen when idle and rally range as normal barracks.
*Mithril Armor (Cost 250/200): increase the Dwarven Armor by 10/20 and reduce all ranged damage taken by 40/80%.
*Mithril Hammer (Cost 200/100/100): increase the Dwarven attack damage by 3/6/9 and gives them a 10/20/30% chance of stunning enemies for 1 second in each attack.
*Dwarfweiser (Cost 220/150/150): Grants life regeneration of 20 HP per second for 3/5/7 seconds when bellow 100 HP. Also gives the Dwarven a passive 1/2/3 HP regeneration per second even while in combat.
​
-SCUMM Bar: becoming a standard barrack tower, now it spawn one of each pirate unit: a Corsair and a Boatswain in the front and a Buccaneer in the back. They have different stats from before, and now all three units have a 15 second respawn rate and same rally range as a baseline barrack. Also, each of the pirates have one upgrade associated with them, increasing their usefullness, making this a very well-rounded type of barrack. Corsairs can steal money while having a dodge/counterattack similar to Assassin's, but they always steal gold when their dodge chance proc. Boatswains are tankier and can sustain a lot of punishment. Buccaneers can attack at range and can deal True Damage with it's upgrade.
Cost 250 Gold.
-Corsair: 250 HP. Attack 20-25 with a 1,0 attack rate. No armor. Have a baseline 15% chance of stealing 2-5 Gold on each attack.
-Boatswain: 600 HP (780 with Heavy Weigth maximum upgraded). Attack 20-40 (deals damage in a small AoE with each attack) with a 2,0 attack rate. No armor. 60 HP per second when idle.
-Buccaneer: 125 HP. Attack 20-30 (ranged) and 10-15 (melee) with an attack rate of 1,2 in both modes. No armor.
*Swashbuckler (Cost 150/100/100): gives the Corsair a 15/25/35% dodge chance with a strike back that always steals Gold.
*Heavy Weight (Cost 200/150/150): increase the Boatswain HP by 60/120/180 and gives them a 2/4/6 HP regeneration even while in combat.
*Flaming Booze (Cost 180/120/120) Buccaneer's ranged attack leaves a small area of flames behind, dealing 10/20/30 True damage per second to enemies on top of it.
​
-Mercenary Camp: this barrack is now a Hybrid after one of the upgrades, normally spawing 2 Legionnaries and 1 Genie, with an added Legion Archer on top of the tower to fire at enemies. Yes, I combined both the Mercenary Camp and the Legion Archer into one, and gave them a few upgrades to make them distinct from other barracks. What they do offer is a inate magical damage with the Genie and the Legionnaires special upgrade, the instakill from the Genie and the Archer on top that functions essentially like a tier 3 Archer tower, firing at enemies bellow in the path.
Cost 230 Gold. Rally range is the same as it's Attack Range (equal to a T3 Archer tower). 15 second Respawn.
-Legionnaire: 250 HP. Attack 20-30 with a 1,0 attack rate. No armor.
-Genie: 350 HP. Attack 20-40 (magical damage) with a 1,0 attack rate. No armor.
*Legion Archer (Cost 200/200/200): adds 1/2/3 Legion Archers on top of the tower to fire at enemies in the path. Archers attack is 10-16 with a 1,2/0,8/0,4 attack rate.
*Curse of the Desert (Cost 150/120/120): gives Legionnaires 5/10/15 bonus magical damage for 2/4/6 attacks. 12 second CD.
*Polymorph (Cost 200/150/150): the Genie can polymorph an enemy unit instantly killing it. 20/17/14 second CD.
​
The only Special Barrack I haven't made yet is the Spear Maiden Hut, since I couldn't find a niche for them, since we allready have a barrack good against multiple enemies (Barbarian), good against ranged units (Dwarfs), with magical attacks (Mercenary Camp), Versatility (SCUMM Bar) and tankiness (Paladins and Sasquatch). So, fell free to give suggestion for them (maybe focus on Poison or something like that?) and to tell me what are your thought on the ones I allready implemented into the mod, and is just tweaking the numbers now.

2.26.0.36 -> 2.26.0.40 Part 1

• VBCI 2 (MCT-30) : Max field repair time lowered
• Game parameter changes :
  • New Burn mark parameters :
    • Ship radius = 7
    • Ship position push multiplier = 5
    • Ship direction push multiplier = 1.15
  • Ground TWS is now called TWS GTM
  • Damage Model parameter changes :
    • Visual Shrapnel Inner Radius : 0.15 -> 0.05
    • Radiators :
      • Repair speed lowered by 65%
      • It can now be repaired to 100%
  • Physical material parameter changes :
    • All, except Bricks, Concrete, Metal, Wood and Football ramp : "iak" : 0.2 -> 0.5
    • Football ramp : "iak" : 0.2 -> 1
    • Track friction on concrete : 0.9 -> 0.95
    • Wheel friction on concrete : 0.8 -> 0.95
• Sound changes :
  • Tank engines : Max sounds in the 20-400 m radius : 8 -> 16
  • Tracks : Max radius : 200 -> 300 m
  • New engine sound : BTR-80
  • Some long-rod APFSDS now use the APCR loading crew voice

Aircraft changes :

• A6M3 :
  • Added custom loadouts
  • New loadout : 1x Drop tank (stock)
  • Loadout changed : 2x 60kg : Removed Required modification 9 in (mod30)
• Buccaneer S. Mk. 1, Kfir Canard : Updated cockpit
• D4Y3 : Loadout changed : 3x 250 kg : Bombs are now dropped separately
• F-4C, F-4E, F-4EJ (all), F-4F (all), F-4S : Drop tank :
  • Fuel mass : 2271 -> 1850 kg
  • Now visible in menu
• F-4E (ISR) : Drop tank :
  • Fuel mass : 2271 -> 1850 kg
  • Model : US -> ISR
  • Now visible in menu
• F-4E Kurnass 2000 :
  • Updated cockpit
  • Engines : Engine armor -> Jet engine armor
  • New loadout : 6x Python 3
  • Loadout changed : x Empty (stock) -> 1x Drop tank (stock)
  • Removed loadouts:
    • 4x AIM-7E-2
    • 4x AIM-7F
  • Custom loadout changes :
    • Slot 3, 9 changed : Added 2x Python 3 option, can't be equipped together with 3x AGM-65D on slot 2
    • Slot 4, 8 changed :
      • Removed 1x AIM-7E-2 option
      • Removed 1x AIM-7F option
    • Slot 5 changed :
      • Option changed : 1x AIM-9G (stock), can't be equipped together with 1x AIM-7E-2 on slot 4 or 1x AIM-7F on slot 4 or 2x BLU-27/B on slot 6 -> 1x AIM-9G (stock), can't be equipped together with 2x BLU-27/B on slot 6
      • Option changed : 1x AIM-9L, can't be equipped together with 1x AIM-7E-2 on slot 4 or 1x AIM-7F on slot 4 or 2x BLU-27/B on slot 6 -> 1x AIM-9L, can't be equipped together with 2x BLU-27/B on slot 6
      • Added 1x Python 3 option, can't be equipped together with 2x BLU-27/B on slot 6
      • Removed 1x AIM-7E-2 option
      • Removed 1x AIM-7F option
    • Slot 6 changed : Added 1x Drop tank (stock) option
    • Slot 7 changed :
      • Option changed : 1x AIM-9G (stock), can't be equipped together with 1x AIM-7E-2 on slot 8 or 1x AIM-7F on slot 8 or 2x BLU-27/B on slot 6 -> 1x AIM-9G (stock), can't be equipped together with 2x BLU-27/B on slot 6
      • Option changed : 1x AIM-9L, can't be equipped together with 1x AIM-7E-2 on slot 8 or 1x AIM-7F on slot 8 or 2x BLU-27/B on slot 6 -> 1x AIM-9L, can't be equipped together with 2x BLU-27/B on slot 6
      • Added 1x Python 3 option, can't be equipped together with 2x BLU-27/B on slot 6
      • Removed 1x AIM-7E-2 option
      • Removed 1x AIM-7F option
• F-4J :
  • Added ejection seat
  • New loadout : 1x Drop tank (stock)
  • Custom loadout changes :
    • Max load : 7257 -> 7400 kg
    • Slot 6 changed : Added 1x Drop tank (stock) option
• F-4J (UK), Phantom F.G. Mk. 1, Phantom F.G.R. Mk. 2 :
  • Added ejection seat
  • New loadout : 1x Drop tank (stock)
  • Custom loadout changes : Slot 6 changed : Added 1x Drop tank (stock) option
• F-14B :
  • Targeting pod camera moved
  • New loadout : 2x GBU-24/B + 1x LANTIRN
  • Loadouts changed :
    • 4x AIM-9L + 320x Flares / Chaff -> 4x AIM-9L + 640x Flares / Chaff
    • 1x GBU-10/B : Required modification changed : GBU-10 -> GBU-10/24
  • Custom loadout changes :
    • Slot 2, 5 changed :
      • Added 160x Flares / Chaff option
      • Added 160x Flares / Chaff + 1x AIM-9L (stock) option
    • Slot 3 changed :
      • Option changed : 1x AIM-7M, can't be equipped together with 1x GBU-10/B on slot 5 -> 1x AIM-7M, can't be equipped together with 1x GBU-10/B on slot 5 or 1x GBU-24/B on slot 5
      • Option changed : 2x AIM-7M, can't be equipped together with 1x AIM-54A on slot 5 or 1x AIM-54C on slot 5 or 1x 500lb on slot 5 or 1x 1000 lb on slot 5 or 1x 2000lb on slot 5 or 1x GBU-10/B on slot 5 or 1x Mk. 82 AIR on slot 5 or 1x Mk 83 AIR on slot 5 -> 2x AIM-7M, can't be equipped together with 1x AIM-54A on slot 5 or 1x AIM-54C on slot 5 or 1x 500lb on slot 5 or 1x 1000 lb on slot 5 or 1x 2000lb on slot 5 or 1x GBU-10/B on slot 5 or 1x Mk. 82 AIR on slot 5 or 1x Mk 83 AIR on slot 5 or 1x GBU-24/B on slot 5
      • Option changed : 2x AIM-54A, can't be equipped together with 1x 2000lb on slot 5 or 1x GBU-10/B on slot 5 -> 2x AIM-54A, can't be equipped together with 1x 2000lb on slot 5 or 1x GBU-10/B on slot 5 or 1x GBU-24/B on slot 5
      • Option changed : 2x AIM-54C, can't be equipped together with 1x 2000lb on slot 5 or 1x GBU-10/B on slot 5 -> 2x AIM-54C, can't be equipped together with 1x 2000lb on slot 5 or 1x GBU-10/B on slot 5 or 1x GBU-24/B on slot 5
      • Added 1x GBU-24/B option, must be equipped together with 1x LANTIRN on slot 7
    • Slot 4 changed : Added 1x GBU-24/B option, must be equipped together with 1x LANTIRN on slot 7
• F-16A-10 (ISR) :
  • New loadout : 6x Python 3
  • Custom loadout changes : Slot 1, 2, 3, 7, 8, 9 changed : Added 1x Python 3 option
• G.91 3 :
  • New loadout : 2x Canon de 30mm DEFA 552 + 2x Mk. 82 Snakeye
  • Custom loadout changes : Slot 2, 5 changed :Added 1x Mk. 82 Snakeye option
• G.91 4 (all) :
  • New loadout : 4x Machine Gun, Caliber .50, AN/M3 + 2x Mk. 82 Snakeye
  • Custom loadout changes : Slot 2, 5 changed : Added 1x Mk. 82 Snakeye option
• G.91 Y :
  • New loadouts :
    • 2x AA.20
    • 2x AS.20
    • 2x AS.30
    • 4x Mk. 82 Snakeye
  • Custom loadout changes :
    • Slot 1, 4 changed : Added 1x Mk. 82 Snakeye option
    • Slot 2, 3 changed :
      • Added 1x Mk. 82 Snakeye option
      • Added 1x AS.20 option
      • Added 1x AA.20 option
      • Added 1x AS.30 option
• G.91 YS :
  • New loadout : 4x Mk. 82 Snakeye
  • Custom loadout changes : Slot 2, 3, 4, 5 changed : Added 1x Mk. 82 Snakeye option
• GL 832 HY :
  • Float offset : 0.6 -> 0.4
  • DM rewritten
• Harrier G.R. Mk. 7 : Sight zoom : 1.51x / 1.86x -> 1.88x -> 6x
• Il-2 (1941) :
  • Loadouts changed :
    • 4x FAB-100 + 4x RBS-132 -> 4x FAB-100 + 8x RBS-132
    • 4x RBS-132 -> 8x RBS-132
    • 4x ROFS-132 -> 8x ROFS-132
    • 4x ROS-132 -> 8x ROS-132
  • Custom loadout changes : Slot 1, 6 changed :
    • Option changed : 2x ROS-132 -> 4x ROS-132
    • Option changed : 2x ROFS-132 -> 4x ROFS-132
    • Option changed : 2x RBS-132 -> 4x RBS-132
• J8 (all) :
  • New loadouts :
    • 2x 500-4
    • 2x Model 500-3
  • Custom loadout changes : Slot 2, 6 changed :
    • Added 1x Model 500-3 option
    • Added 1x 500-4 option
• Kfir C2 :
  • Updated cockpit
  • New loadouts :
    • 76x 2.75-inch FFAR Mk. 4 + 4x 500lb + 2x Python 3
    • 4x 500lb + 16x FFAR MK 32 MOD 0 + 2x Python 3
    • 4x 1000 lb + 2x Python 3
    • 2x 2000lb + 2x Python 3
    • 8x M117 + 2x Python 3
    • 2x Python 3
  • Removed loadouts :
    • 76x 2.75-inch FFAR Mk. 4 + 4x 500lb + 2x AIM-9G
    • 4x 500lb + 2x AIM-9G + 16x FFAR MK 32 MOD 0
    • 4x 1000 lb + 2x AIM-9G
    • 2x 2000lb + 2x AIM-9G
    • 2x AIM-9G + 8x M117
  • Custom loadout changes : Slot 1, 7 changed : Added 1x Python 3 option
• Kfir C7 :
  • Updated cockpit
  • New loadout : 4x Python 3
  • Custom loadout changes : Slot 1, 2, 6, 7 changed : Added 1x Python 3 option
• Ki 45 Kai Tei, Ki 84 (all) : Loadout changed : 2x 250 kg : Bombs are now dropped separately
• MiG-23 (all), MiG-27 (all) : Drop tank fuel mass : 800 -> 650 kg
• Mirage 2000-5F : Targeting pod zoom = 6.15x / 98.21x
• N1K2-Ja : Loadout changed : 4x 60 kg : Bombs are now dropped separately
• PBY-5A (late) (FR) : Side turrets : 12.7 mm AN/M2 -> 12.7 mm AN/M2 (late)
• Su-17 (all), Su-22 (all) : Drop tank fuel mass : 1600 -> 1300 kg
• Su-25T :
  • Drop tank fuel mass : 1600 -> 1300 kg
  • Targeting pod NVD :
    • Resolution : 500x300 -> 900x500
    • Light multiplier : 12 -> 8
  • New loadout : 4x S-25L
• Su-39 :
  • Drop tank fuel mass : 1600 -> 1300 kg
  • New loadouts:
    • 1x Kopyo-25 + 2x R-60M (stock)
    • 2x R-60M + 4x S-25L
• TB-3 : Cockpit is now considered open when it comes to sounds
• Tornado G.R. Mk. 1 :
  • Loadout changed : 2x PGM 2000 -> 3x PGM 2000
  • Custom loadout changes :
    • Slot 3, 9 changed : Added 1x PGM 2000 option
    • Slot 4 changed :
      • Added 1x PGM 2000 option, can't be equipped together with 1x PGM 2000 on slot 8
      • Removed 1x PGM 2000 option
    • Slot 6 changed :
      • Option changed : 1x 1000 lb, can't be equipped together with 2x 1000 lb on slots 4, 5, 7, 8 or 2x 1000 lb Mk.13 No.117 on slots 4, 5, 7, 8 or 2x 1000 lb on slots 4, 5, 7, 8 or 1x PGM 500 on slots 4, 8 or 1x PGM 2000 on slots 4, 8 or 1x GBU-24/B on slot 8 -> 1x 1000 lb, can't be equipped together with 2x 1000 lb on slots 4, 5, 7, 8 or 2x 1000 lb Mk.13 No.117 on slots 4, 5, 7, 8 or 2x 1000 lb on slots 4, 5, 7, 8 or 1x PGM 500 on slots 4, 8 or 1x PGM 2000 on slot 4 or 1x GBU-24/B on slot 8 or 1x PGM 2000 on slot 8
      • Option changed : 1x 1000 lb Mk.13 No.117, can't be equipped together with 2x 1000 lb on slots 4, 5, 7, 8 or 2x 1000 lb Mk.13 No.117 on slots 4, 5, 7, 8 or 2x 1000 lb on slots 4, 5, 7, 8 or 1x PGM 500 on slots 4, 8 or 1x PGM 2000 on slots 4, 8 or 1x GBU-24/B on slot 8 -> 1x 1000 lb Mk.13 No.117, can't be equipped together with 2x 1000 lb on slots 4, 5, 7, 8 or 2x 1000 lb Mk.13 No.117 on slots 4, 5, 7, 8 or 2x 1000 lb on slots 4, 5, 7, 8 or 1x PGM 500 on slots 4, 8 or 1x PGM 2000 on slot 4 or 1x GBU-24/B on slot 8 or 1x PGM 2000 on slot 8
      • Option changed : 1x 1000 lb, can't be equipped together with 2x 1000 lb on slots 4, 5, 7, 8 or 2x 1000 lb Mk.13 No.117 on slots 4, 5, 7, 8 or 2x 1000 lb on slots 4, 5, 7, 8 or 1x PGM 500 on slots 4, 8 or 1x PGM 2000 on slots 4, 8 or 1x GBU-24/B on slot 8 -> 1x 1000 lb, can't be equipped together with 2x 1000 lb on slots 4, 5, 7, 8 or 2x 1000 lb Mk.13 No.117 on slots 4, 5, 7, 8 or 2x 1000 lb on slots 4, 5, 7, 8 or 1x PGM 500 on slots 4, 8 or 1x PGM 2000 on slot 4 or 1x GBU-24/B on slot 8 or 1x PGM 2000 on slot 8
      • Option changed : 1x MK 13 MOD 0 (Paveway), can't be equipped together with 2x 1000 lb on slots 4, 5, 7, 8 or 2x 1000 lb Mk.13 No.117 on slots 4, 5, 7, 8 or 2x 1000 lb on slots 4, 5, 7, 8 or 1x PGM 500 on slots 4, 8 or 1x PGM 2000 on slots 4, 8 or 1x GBU-24/B on slot 8, must be equipped together with 1x TIALD on slot 4 -> 1x MK 13 MOD 0 (Paveway), can't be equipped together with 2x 1000 lb on slots 4, 5, 7, 8 or 2x 1000 lb Mk.13 No.117 on slots 4, 5, 7, 8 or 2x 1000 lb on slots 4, 5, 7, 8 or 1x PGM 500 on slots 4, 8 or 1x PGM 2000 on slot 4 or 1x GBU-24/B on slot 8 or 1x PGM 2000 on slot 8, must be equipped together with 1x TIALD on slot 4
• BO 105 CB-2, Ka-29, Mi-24P (all), Mi-24V, Mi-28A, Mi-35M, UH-1B, UH-1C : Maximum number of simultaneously guided missiles is now limited to 1
• SA 342 L, Z9 (all), Z11WA : 12.7 mm gunpod : Mass : 130 -> 42.25 kg

Sensor changes :

• AI Mk. 24 Foxhunter (all) : ACM lock range : 9250 -> 18500 m
• AN/APG-66 (all) :
  • Transceiver antenna : Elevation : Angle of half sensitivity : 3.5 -> 4.8°
  • Narrow search pattern :
    • Pitch stabilization limit : 30 -> 60°
    • Period : 0.35 -> 0.65 s
    • Search zone : 5° x 20° -> 8° x 20°
  • Medium search pattern :
    • Elevation limits : -30° / 30° -> -60° / 60°
    • Pitch stabilization limit : 30 -> 60°
    • Period : 2 -> 3.8 s
    • Search zone : 10° x 60° -> 8° x 60°
  • Wide search pattern :
    • Elevation limits : -30° / 30° -> -60° / 60°
    • Pitch stabilization limit : 30 -> 60°
    • Period : 2 -> 3.8 s
    • Search zone : 5° x 120° -> 8° x 120°
  • HUD lock pattern :
    • Elevation limits : -30° / 30° -> -60° / 60°
    • Period : 1.3 -> 1 s
    • Search zone : 20° x 20° -> 19.2° x 20°
  • Vertical lock pattern :
    • Elevation limits : -30° / 30° -> -60° / 60°
    • Period : 1.3 -> 1 s
    • Search zone : 9.9° x 40° -> 9.6° x 40°
  • Acquisition pattern :
    • Elevation limits : -30° / 30° -> -60° / 60°
    • Search zone : 5° x 20° -> 4° x 20°
• AN/AWG-9 (TISEO) : Name : AN/AWG-9 / TISEO -> AN/AWG-9 / AN/AXX-1 TCS
• Kopyo-25 :
  • Ground standby : Name : PD HDN standby -> GTM standby
  • Ground search : Name : TWS HDN search -> GTM search
  • Ground TWS search : Name : TWS HDN search -> TWS GTM search
  • Ground TWS acquisition : Name : TWS HDN acquisition -> TWS GTM acquisition
  • Ground track : Name : PD HDN track -> GTM track
• Thales RDY, Thomson-CSF RDI :
  • PD modes replaced with MPRF and HPRF modes
  • All patterns : Elevation limits : -55° / 55° -> -60° / 60°

Naval changes :

• New vehicle files :
  • Émile Bertin (FR)
  • Marceau (FR)
• AF 99, AF 128, Krischan der Große, KS 5, LS (all), MZ 1, R 41, R 130, R 301, S 38, S 62, S 100 (all), S 204, S 701, SF 05, SF 07, VS 8, VS 10 : Removed 1 skin
• Ise : Engine Max Speed : 47.16 -> 46.8 km/h
• Freccia (P 493) : Loadout changed : 2x S.I. 270 L : Required modification changed : Stock torpedoes -> Torpedo tubes
• Aigle, Vautour : Moved Center of Gravity
• Chacal, Panthere :
  • Radio station, fire control room HP increased
  • Shell and charge ammo storage HP lowered
  • Added Two Fuel Tanks
  • Turret Armor : Antifragmentation armor -> RHA
• Colbert :
  • Horizontal armor above the steering : 30 -> 18 mm
  • Main turret floor : 30 -> 20 mm
  • Rangefinder HP lowered
  • Moment of Inertia : [62, 1500, 930] -> [70, 1710, 1050]
  • Moved Center of Gravity
  • Engine Acceleration Increased
  • Rudder area : 24 -> 30 m
  • Moved Cameras
  • Ammo Outside First Ammo Stage of third and fourth main turrets : Reload Time Multiplier : 1.5 -> 1.2
• Duguay-Trouin, Primauguet : Moved Camera
• Jeanne d'Arc :
  • Removed Free Respawn
  • Moved Center of Gravity
  • Engine Acceleration to 16.2 km/h lowered
• Leopard :
  • Secondary Guns can no longer be fired together with primary cannons
  • Moved Center of Gravity
  • Engine Max Speed : 65.736 -> 58.32 km/h
  • Armor Reworked
  • Added two 20 mm cannons
  • Removed two 40 mm, four 12.7 mm, four 13.2 mm cannons
  • Depth charges : WBG -> Mk. VII
  • Added ammo storage data
• Lorraine :
  • Now rearms in batches
  • First part of angled belt armor in the nose removed
  • Angled belt armor : Thickness : 70 -> 42 mm
  • Moved Center of Gravity
  • Engine Max Speed : 39.636 -> 38.124 km/h
  • Engine Acceleration lowered
  • Rudder area : 28 -> 38
  • Moved Cameras
  • Detection Height : 53.4 -> 42.4 m
  • Breaches :
    • Water Mass Multiplier : 280 -> 160
    • Additional Water Should Die Percent : 26 -> 21 %
    • Side Center Of Mass Offset Percent : 12 -> 10 %
• Milan :
  • Moved Center of Gravity
  • Added 6x 13.2 mm/76 Mle. 1929 Hotchkiss machine gun
• Paris :
  • Armor Reworked
  • Moved Center of Gravity
  • Engine Acceleration lowered
  • Rudder area : 28 -> 38
  • Moved Cameras

Ground vehicle changes :

• M4 (T26) : Added 8 Shell (in the ammo storage, it had less than the gun could use)
• T1E1 : Hull machine gun : Horizontal Limits : +/- 0 -> +/- 15°
• SPz 12-3 (Typ 3Z 8DLA) "Raketenautomat" :
  • Added servo turret turn sound
  • No longer has a magazine reload
  • Added Replenishment Delay = 4 s
  • Added Replenishment Time = 15 s
• BTR-80A :
  • Hull Top : 8 -> 6 mm
  • Gunner Hatch : 8 -> 19 mm
  • Turret : 13 -> 23 mm
  • Hull Top Hatches : 8 -> 6 mm
  • Engine Grille : 5 mm Structural steel -> 6 mm RHA
  • Water Shield : 13 mm RHAHH -> 5 mm Structural steel
  • Turret roof : 13 -> 23
  • Added small plate just under Gunner's Hatch to DM as 23 mm RHAHH
  • Engine Sound : MCTA V6 -> BTR80
  • Turret Turn Sound : Servo -> Manual
  • Added NVD projector
• Vickers Battle Tank Mk. 1 : Added Gun Mask to DM as 50 mm CHA
• Vijayanta :
  • Added Gun Mask to DM as 50 mm CHA
  • Added 4 Skins
• VBCI 2 (MCT-30) :
  • Almost all aluminium armor had their HP increased from 1000 to 10000
  • 1 Front plate inside the hull front : 45 -> 35 mm
  • Lower Hull Sides : 20 -> 35 mm
  • Inner Rear hull : 15 -> 35 mm
  • Plate above tracks : 15 -> 35 mm
  • Crew compartment floor : 15 -> 35 mm
  • Rear Door : 50 -> 35 mm
  • Turret : 40 -> 30 mm
  • Hull roof : 25 -> 35 mm
  • Front Hull Corners : 50 mm Aluminium alloy AMS 4050A -> 12 mm RHAHH
  • Hull floor : 25 -> 35 mm
  • Armor around the Gun Breech : 25 -> 30 mm
  • Second layer of Upper Hull Sides : 25 -> 35 mm
  • Gun Mantlet : 25 mm Aluminium alloy AMS 4050A -> 10 mm RHAHH
  • First layer of upper Hull Side : 25 mm Aluminium alloy AMS 4050A -> 12 mm RHAHH
  • Armor plate inside turret : 10 -> 30 mm
  • Armor in the middle of the turret ring : 25 -> 30 mm
  • Driver hatch : 25 -> 35 mm
  • Inner Part of the hull rear : 25 -> 35 mm
  • Inner Part of the rear door : 50 -> 35 mm
  • Small armors on the UFP : 25 -> 35 mm
  • Lower LFP : 25 -> 35 mm
  • Add-on UFP armor : 25 mm Aluminium alloy AMS 4050A -> 5 mm RHA
  • Plate around rear Door : 25 mm Aluminium alloy AMS 4050A -> 12 mm RHAHH
  • Boxes next to turret : 25 -> 35 mm
  • Boxes on the front of hull : 25 mm Aluminium alloy AMS 4050A -> 5 mm Structural steel
  • UFP : 5 mm Aluminium alloy AMS 4050A -> 12 mm RHAHH
  • Front Hatches : 5 mm Aluminium alloy AMS 4050A -> 12 mm RHAHH
  • LFP : 25 mm Aluminium alloy AMS 4050A -> 12 mm RHAHH
  • Little Armor Box between wheels : 25 -> 35 mm
  • Part of the door : 25 mm Aluminium alloy AMS 4050A -> 12 mm RHAHH
  • 1 front plate : 25 mm Aluminium alloy AMS 4050A -> 12 mm RHAHH
  • Engine Grilles : 25 -> 35 mm
  • Armor behind wheels : 25 mm Aluminium alloy AMS 4050A -> 12 mm RHAHH
  • 12.7 mm Support : 25 -> 20 mm
  • Gun Mask: 65 mm Aluminium alloy AMS 4050A -> 10 mm RHAHH
  • Turret sides: 42 mm Aluminium alloy AMS 4050A -> 10 mm RHAHH
  • Turret back : 25 mm Aluminium alloy AMS 4050A -> 10 mm RHAHH
  • Turret Roof : 25 mm Aluminium alloy AMS 4050A -> 10 mm RHAHH
  • Front of turret : 25 mm Aluminium alloy AMS 4050A -> 10 mm RHAHH
  • Rear of turret upper plate : 25 mm Aluminium alloy AMS 4050A -> 10 mm RHAHH
  • Bottom of turret : 20 -> 30 mm
  • Part of turret ring : 25 -> 35 mm
  • Turret rear corners : 25 mm Aluminium alloy AMS 4050A -> 10 mm RHAHH
  • Turret roof hatches: 25 -> 30 mm
  • Plates next to gun : 25 -> 30 mm
  • Turret front corners : 25 mm Aluminium alloy AMS 4050A -> 10 mm RHAHH
  • Sight Support : 25 -> 30 mm
  • Part of turret ring : 5 mm Structural steel -> 30 mm Aluminium alloy AMS 4050A
  • Gun support : 5 mm Structural steel -> 30 mm Aluminium alloy AMS 4050A
  • Gun barrels :
    • HP : 200 -> 100
    • 35 -> 10 mm
  • Added plates between turret crew and driver compartment to DM as 10 mm Aluminium alloy AMS 4050A
  • Added plates between the engine and turret crew, and in front of the driver to DM as 5 mm Aluminium alloy AMS 4050A, visible in X-Ray
  • Added plate between 1st and 2nd wheels on the right side to DM as 12 mm RHAHH
  • Added Driver periscope to DM as 5 mm Structural steel
  • Removed 4 plate of 25 mm, 3 plate of 30 mm and 1 plate of 65 mm Aluminium alloy AMS 4050A, 5 plate of 5 mm Structural steel, 4 optics
  • Cannon breech, horizontal turret drive, transmission and ammo can no longer be overpressured
  • 30 mm Bushmaster 2 Mk. 44 cannon :
    • Horizontal Speed : 30 -> 60 °/s
    • Vertical Speed : 8 -> 60 °/s
    • Vertical Limit : [-8, 20] -> [-10, 45]°
    • Added 2 Plane Stabilizer (mfw first french IFV and first french Stabilized vehicle is a premium ))))
  • 12.7 mm M2 HB : Sight can now use NVD
  • Added Commander Sight (Also Stabilized)
  • Second and fourth set of wheels now have 10° steering
  • Zoom : 10 -> [2, 14.74]
  • FoV : 3.9 -> 17°
  • Added Target Tracker
  • Gunner Thermal :
    • 500x300 -> 1200x800
    • Noise Factor : 0.05 -> 0.04
  • Added Commander Thermal :
    • 1200x800
    • Noise Factor = 0.04
  • Driver NVD :
    • 800x600 -> 1200x800
    • Light Multiplier : 5 -> 7
  • Added Ammo Storage data
• Sherman Mk. IVb (M3) : Added a First Ammo Stage of 23 shells (Reload x 1.33 beyond)
• Magach 6 Bet Gal : Added Delay between Smoke Salvo = 0.5 s

Current Dev version : 2.26.0.40
Current Dev-Stable version : 2.25.1.135
Current Live version : 2.25.1.135

Intro:
I test drove a Taycan Turbo a couple of years ago and absolutely fell in love with the car. It had this amazing blend of performance and technology that really appealed to me, but unfortunately was very much out of my price range.
I was fortunate enough to get some lucky rolls of the dice financially and was able to add a C8 Corvette to my garage while still maintaining a Model 3 Performance as a daily driver. I had long thought that this was the ultimate price performance power combo. The Model 3 Performance punches way above its weight class for the price. While the C8 provides the supercar driving experience for a fraction of the money. Though the power combo is a match that I am very lucky to have in my garage, all isn’t perfect. I spend the vast majority of my time in my Tesla and there are a lot of instances where it doesn’t quite feel special or unique enough nowadays. Likewise, I hate buying gas for my C8, and despite its overall driving prowess it does actually feel a little slow compared to my Model 3 due to its lack of instantaneous torque that I’ve grown accustomed to. I also feel like I have a lot of money being spent on a C8 that I only get to experience on the weekends so have been curious if there’s a way to experience a bit more of that “specialness” day to day.
I then looked at some used Porsche Taycans randomly one day and noticed that used 4S models and used Turbo models were well below the combined price of both of my Tesla and Corvette. So for the past few weeks I became obsessed with the question of whether a single Taycan could give me the best of both my Model 3 and Corvette in a package that was ultimately cheaper than the combined cost of both cars.
I decided to rent a modestly specced Taycan 4S on turo and arrange for an unscientific shoot out amongst all three cars.
About the cars:
https://imgur.com/a/UozILRv
I unfortunately do not know much about the Taycan 4S I rented on Turo however it looked to have the premium pack equipped, the larger performance plus battery, and not much else. It came on the car’s stock standard 19” aero rims.
The Model 3 Performance is a 2022 model year with the refreshed interior.
The C8 is a 2021 2LT with the Z51 package, Magnaride, and front end lift.
Handling (all three)
The handling and ride comfort on all three of these cars is quite good but the Taycan and Corvette are a clear notch above the Tesla. When competing head to head the Corvette beats out the Taycan as a whole due to its weight advantage, but it’s surprising how close the Taycan is to the Corvette.
The Tesla has the least sophisticated suspension of the bunch, but it has quick and darty steering which makes it feel especially agile with its low center of gravity and punchy acceleration. Unfortunately on the twisties the Tesla begins to really lose confidence and starts to wash out somewhere between the 70-80mph range, whereas the other two cars feel planted and ask you to push them further. Likewise, the Tesla’s brakes really aren’t up to the task of bailing you out of any situation once you get into that 70-80mph range on the twisties. Interestingly the Model 3 does weigh about 800lbs less than the Taycan and you can very much feel that weight advantage when throwing it into turns and other tight maneuvers.
The Taycan has the most sophisticated suspension of the bunch with an adaptive air suspension that can adjust both ride height and stiffness. Taycans with more performance options included can also have rear wheel steer, advanced torque vectoring, and anti-roll control, but my Taycan was not equipped with these luxuries. The big elephant in the room is the Taycan’s weight, which can be anywhere between 4800lbs-5100lbs depending on your model, options, etc. Around town you very much feel the Taycan’s extra weight, but it simultaneously also does a good job hiding it.
For instance, my neighborhood has a small roundabout that I had each car take at about 30 mph. Both the Tesla and Model 3 had no problem coming out of the roundabout in a relatively tight and controlled fashion, whereas the Taycan definitely felt like it was having a hard time committing to the line the other cars could take. On the flip side, with more curvaceous terrain (say a canyon or moderate twisties) the car feels very planted, confidence inspiring, capable, and it asks you to push it further. The brakes also feel like they are very capable of bailing you out of any situation. You notice the Tesla’s 4000lb weight with its brakes more than you notice the Taycan’s 4800lbs under braking. Steering in the Taycan is very direct and responsive, but due to the car’s weight and size it can actually feel a little boat-like compared to the other cars when driving them back to back.
As an overall package the Corvette yielded the best result in terms of handling. The steering is quick, easy to place, and communicative compared to the other cars. While I typically feel like the Corvette is a large car, it began to feel very small compared to the Taycan. The biggest difference was its 1100lb weight advantage which allowed it to transition and set itself up much more quickly compared to the other cars in all facets of a corner. The brakes on the Corvette are also superb and legitimately feel like you’re dropping an anchor when you put full pressure on them. Now I will say the Taycan wasn’t far off the Corvette’s mark as a whole, especially on the street, but you could typically feel the Taycan needing to sort itself due to its weight whereas everything felt like it came much more naturally to the Corvette.
Ride Comfort (all three)
I put this in a separate category because I find ride comfort makes a big impact on performance and how hard you can push a car, but also has a lot of implications for how the vehicle accomplishes day to day tasks.
The Taycan is the overall winner of ride comfort here, while the Corvette is not too far behind, and the Tesla is last.
The Tesla has the least sophisticated suspension of the bunch so it’s not exactly a fair fight. While I personally do not find the Tesla to be harsh to experience day to day, on longer trips it can be a fatiguing car to be in, and you do realize what you are missing in the Model 3 after riding in the Taycan and the Corvette. Still I find the Tesla to have a really nice blend of sportiness, comfort, and control.
The C8’s ride quality is superb with magna-ride giving the car a noticeable adjustment in personality and handling characteristics between, tour, sport, and track modes. The C8’s suspension makes it incredibly comfortable to be in for long periods of time, and highway cruising very much feels like a dream on this car. That being said, I do find that certain imperfections can unsettle the car and oddly the car has a tendency to shift diagonally or to the side as opposed to absorbing a bump vertically. This hasn’t ever really caught me off in serious driving, but it can be slightly disconcerting feeling the car shift in what feels to be an unintuitive way. In spirited driving a noticed very little difference between the Taycan’s suspension and the Corvette’s. This isn’t to say that there weren’t differences, just both cars provided a seemingly comparable amount of confidence and ride comfort.
The Taycan does edge out the Corvette in ride comfort because it does present a much smoother ride in normal, day to day conditions. Again, it’s not like the Corvette has a bad ride by any means, but the Taycan’s air suspension does provide a high degree of isolation, and you very much feel like you’re on a cloud whereas the Corvette does transmit a small degree of imperfections and can give the impression of being stiff in some instances compared to the Taycan.
What I found with the Taycan is increasing suspension aggressiveness (ride height, and damper settings) never seemed to actually compromise ride quality, it just improved the level of control and how “tight” the car felt overall. Whereas in the Corvette tour mode can feel a little too soft and floaty, sport essentially allows you to take everything with a single controlled “bump”, and track tightens things up but also transmits a bunch of imperfections that don’t exactly give you more feedback about what the car is doing, nor help improve your confidence.
Again, this isn’t to say that the Corvette’s ride quality is bad by any means…it’s pretty fantastic. In my opinion the Tacyan has the best performance oriented ride quality I’ve ever felt, and the Corvette just happens to be second best.
Acceleration (all three)
I would say the acceleration amongst all three of these cars is a dead heat on the streets. They each deliver an incredible amount of power and speed but they do so differently and I think anyone will find joy in how these cars accelerate.
If we were to do a drag race the Tesla would be the quickest of the bunch. It has a very “bursty” amount of speed and torque that it’s happy to deliver in immense doses from anywhere between 0-80mph. The Model 3 also obtained the highest “G” acceleration out of the three cars. With a .9 G from a dead stop and .7 G being delivered with a full stab of the throttle at speed. Though the Tesla definitely feels the quickest on the road, it does lose steam at around 80mph and the car generally doesn’t feel like it wants to go much faster than 100mph. The beauty of the Tesla’s power delivery is how easy it is. Just press the pedal and you’ll get the full beans no matter what you’re doing.
The Taycan has an interesting approach to its acceleration. It has a 2-speed gear box which allows the car to deliver a bit more torque at higher speeds. This gearbox does give the Taycan a very healthy amount of pull at 80mph, and the car doesn’t feel like it’s running out of steam past 100mph. That high-end speed does come at the expense of some low-end responsiveness. When at a dead stop and mashing the pedal, the car will sometimes hesitate for a split moment as it tries to decide which gear to use. Likewise the Taycan’s acceleration feels much more linear. The Tesla wants to melt your face off right from the get-go, but the Taycan keeps pushing you back in your seat the longer you use the pedal.
I’m really not a fan of using launch control on the street, since I just find the setup procedure to not always be appropriate when other traffic is around. However the Taycan’s launch mode is an absolute treat. It rockets you back initially and then the 2nd gear kicks in several seconds later and you get another surge of speed. Where a Tesla’s launch feels like it’s probably good for about 4 seconds worth of enjoyment, a Taycan’s feels like it’s good for about 8-10 seconds worth of fun.
The Taycan pulled .8 G in launch mode but could only manage to pull .4 G when mashing the pedal at basically any speed, I think this .4 G acceleration is due to the car’s weight and how linearly Porsche decides to deliver the power.
The Corvette decidedly feels the least torquey of the bunch, but has the best power to weight ratio and has no problem letting its speed climb to very high numbers with seemingly little effort. I rarely use launch control in my C8, so while I don’t have a launch G-force to compare to, the Corvette was regularly pulling .55 and .65 G’s doing 3rd and 4th gear pulls. It did pull .7 G’s on a second gear pull, but due to how the torque builds the .7 G’s did not feel nearly as strong or as aggressive as Tesla’s .7 G’s.
So to describe the acceleration characteristics broadly.
The Tesla is the 0-80mph champion and the quickest off the line. The Porsche is slower and less responsive off the line, but gives you a much better pull 80mph+ and has a more satisfying torque/acceleration curve all around. Despite being a torque monster of an ICE vehicle, the Corvette feels the least torquey all throughout but feels like it’s the quickest and easiest to hit high numbers in. It particularly loves 3rd and 4th gear pulls.
Canyon Carving (all three)
I took all three cars through a nearby canyon that I essentially drive every weekend and did the same loop in each car. Trying to push it as much as I felt comfortable/safe to do so.
The first car up was the Taycan. After driving the Taycan around town and feeling its weight in certain corners and a slightly hesitant acceleration in some instances, I was ready to write it off compared to the Corvette. Boy was I wrong.
The Taycan attacks canyon corners with a supreme amount of confidence and is happy to load you up on a variety of G-forces. Its suspension, even in its stiffest “sports plus” setting never felt rough or punishing, it simply provided more control over the vehicle. Despite the car’s weight, the brakes felt completely capable of keeping me out of trouble. I honestly thought the Taycan would start to let off or give up the more I pushed it, and instead it was very happy asking for more.
What I particularly enjoyed was the fact that the silent EV motors let me push the car quite a bit without drawing too much attention to myself. Likewise if I got stuck behind slower moving traffic, it felt more “okay” than it did in the Corvette because I wasn’t burning gas, and the car is a little more suited to normal driving.
With EV’s there’s also very much an “invisible safety blanket” that the electric motors and traction control feel like they provide. They are so fast to respond to everything, that you really do feel like you can never get yourself into trouble. The Corvette has a healthy amount of aides as well, but they feel like “Orc” technology compared to an EV’s “Elven” technology.
I will be honest in saying that I was probably able to push the Taycan harder than I was able to push the Corvette and it made me feel like a bit of a superhero in the car. I honestly couldn’t believe that a car that had 4 doors was able to essentially give me a very comparable canyon carving experience to my Corvette. My neck and back were actually tired due to the G’s I was able to pull in the Taycan and I’ve yet to feel that in the Corvette.
I then hopped into my Corvette and it was like having the best college football team play against an NFL team. Yes there’s a ton of talent on that college football team but the NFL team is just operating at a whole different pace. The Corvette was able to take everything I threw at it with ease. If I had the Taycan operating at 7/10ths the Corvette was able to achieve those speeds at what felt like closer to 5/10ths for it.
The C8 felt much quicker to respond to every input and felt like it was always ready to continue accelerating due to its lighter weight, whereas the Taycan would almost take a moment to settle itself before rocking you back with its power.
As mentioned above, I did have a hard time pushing the Corvette as hard as the Taycan for two reasons. First the exhaust very much announces how hard you are pushing the car and there’s only so much you can do while still appearing somewhat outwardly responsible. Secondly, the Corvette doesn’t quite feel like it has the “invisible shield” of the Taycan which will not only bail you out of any problem, but will also prevent you from getting into any problem to begin with. This isn’t to say that the Corvette isn’t confidence inspiring, or doesn’t do a lot to help you as a driver, but you get the sense that Corvette can find itself in a situation where it really can’t help you, and the Taycan makes it feel like that’s never a possibility.
Though the Corvette felt like it was much more of a natural in the canyons (and rightfully so), that next level of performance in the Corvette feels like it’s something you have to explore at the track, whereas the Taycan feels like it can give you everything its got in the canyons. In a way the Taycan feels like it is much more optimized to be fun, fast, and enjoyable in a canyon, where the Corvette has a lot of track capability that translates well to the canyons, but some of that track capability is an edginess that you don’t really want to explore on the streets and doesn’t exactly translate to driving fun as directly as the Taycan’s driving experience does.
The Tesla was the least impressive of the bunch in the canyons. It had the most rapid acceleration, but would consistently wash-out around 70mph or so. Whereas the other two cars would give you what you asked for and then ask you to push them more, the Tesla would kind of go “I gave you an awesome acceleration, what do you mean you need me to do something else?”
The regenerative braking on the Tesla also makes it hard to push.. Whereas the Taycan and Corvette could just carry quite a bit of momentum after an acceleration, the Tesla wants to slow down immediately after you left off the accelerator. Now in track mode you can decrease the amount of regeneration that you encounter (which I did), but you then begin to experience the fact that the brakes feel underpowered without the regen present. So it was very hard to connect the corners as seamlessly as you could in the Corvette and Taycan. The Tesla was very much “let’s slow down going in and accelerate like crazy going out…only to slow back down immediately after corner exit” whereas the Corvette and Taycan were just flying between corners and transitions without any hesitation.
This isn’t to say that the Tesla isn’t fun or can’t be fun in the canyons. In fact I’d say it could pretty handedly curb stomp say a stock C6 Corvette in a canyon. But it very much makes its limitations known and is the least eager to be there.
I would say the Corvette is the winner here by virtue of its talent, but the Taycan is actually the more impressive car to experience in the canyons. You’ll feel like you’re going faster, puling more G’s, and are ultimately safer in the Taycan than you will in the Corvette.
Fun Factor (Corvette vs. Porsche)
This is a tricky one where both cars trade quite a few blows but the Corvette ultimately wins.
The Corvette displays a lot of personality. It is flashy to look at, the engine can draw a lot of attention, and the car presents itself as being totally focused on going fast. You very much do get quite a bit of the supercar experience in the Corvette.
However, the Corvette’s flashiness does have some legitimate downsides. People automatically assume I’m a jerk when I’m in it, traffic is noticeably less accommodating, and I’ve had people go out of their way to try to screw with me. Likewise when you encounter slower traffic in a Corvette it feels like a complete let down. This isn’t to say that the car isn’t comfortable at slower speeds or anything like that, it’s just that the Corvette needs some open space around it for it to really start to show itself and that can be hard to find in a world full of Priuses and folks who like to text while driving.
Interestingly, the Corvette’s comfortable suspension and ability to really back down its aggressiveness in tour mode, makes it a really enjoyable cruiser. Some of my favorite moments in the car have been putting around small little neighborhood roads at 25 mph exploring places I’ve never been to before with some good tunes playing in the background.
In a world full of EV’s the lack of instant torque does make the Corvette feel like it’s missing a bit of an edge in its performance. The C8 is still incredibly fast by all marks and measures, but it isn’t quite satiating me with its acceleration like Corvettes used to in a world prior to EV’s.
The Taycan very much brings you into its own elegant world. When you get inside the car there is almost a deliberate pause, and then the screens burst to life, the seat pushes you towards the steering wheel and you get the sense that the car is ready and willing to take you on its own specially curated trip now that you’ve entered it.
There is a strong level of enjoyment for how nice the car looks and feels on the inside and the perceived level of quality it is able to provide. Every passenger I had in the Taycan kept remarking to themselves “Oh man…this is nice”. I also personally feel like this is the best looking Porsche on the market. It feels properly futuristic, striking and timeless. It very much holds its own compared to the Corvette and you’re always going to enjoy walking up to it and turning around to get one more look before walking away.
The Taycan feels like it can switch itself into a bonafide sports car at any point. I’ve had many occasions where I’ve unexpectedly found myself on a nice stretch of road in my Tesla and wishing I could be in my Corvette. With the Taycan it’s a simple switch to sports mode and you’re there. You can also drive the Taycan much more aggressively without bringing as much attention to yourself. It feels like your own private sports car when you’re inside of it, almost like you’re going undercover so that you can drive however you want in peace.
The Corvette in contrast is very good for those times when you want to give everyone around you the proverbial middle finger. I’ve had times when I’ve been upset at work or situations in life, and just seeing how mean and aggressive the Corvette looks and to experience how pissed off it can sound has made me feel better. It’s a cathartic car to be in and it can really inspire you to keep fighting when you’re feeling a little down.
Lastly, the Corvette has one major advantage over the Taycan and that’s the fact that the roof can come off. There’s just some days where things are better with the top off,the Corvette gives you the option to experience that whenever you need to and I’ve found it to be incredibly gratifying.
Range (Model 3 vs Taycan)
I’d also say that range is a pretty contested topic between these two cars. The Tesla has a very impressive EPA rating of around 300 miles, but most owners (myself included) feel like they do not get anywhere near that range. The Taycan has an objectively abysmal EPA rating of around 220 miles, but most owners feel like the rating is more accurate in the real world or that they can beat the rating by hefty margins.
I did a healthy amount of driving in the Taycan when I had it and subjectively felt that the range dropped about as fast as it dropped in my Tesla when driving like a normal human being. But when I drove the Taycan just a bit more conservatively its range seemed to hold a bit longer than the Tesla’s so I personally feel like that behavior lends credence to what a lot of Taycan owners claim.
I did a few comparisons to measure each car’s range consumption. I unfortunately did not have the time to measure the cars on the exact same route for all of the tests etc. But I drove each car in conditions that I would typically encounter in real life and I feel like this gave me a good enough sense of what I could encounter if I were to buy a Taycan.
One thing to note, the Taycan very much likes to adjust its range estimate based on what mode you’re in and how you’re driving. You can set off for the day with 120 miles of indicated range, put the car in sports mode to take a freeway onramp, and you can come back to normal mode having only 95 miles of range simply because of that sports mode flip and how the Taycan re-estimates its range under sports mode driving conditions.
The Tesla on the other hand seems to stick to its indicated range no matter what but it ops to have it drop much quicker to adjust to your driving style. You’ll never see the Tesla go from 120 miles to 95 miles in an instant like you would in the Taycan, but the Tesla will very quickly subtract down from 120 to 95 miles over the course of say 6 miles if it thinks you’re pushing it hard.
Range Test:
I did an “economical” driving test on both the Taycan and Tesla.
For the Taycan I drove 36 miles on mostly range mode with the speed limiter set to 85 mph. Traffic varied between 70-85mph and the car was generally just keeping up with the flow of traffic, not trying to hyper mile, not trying to push itself.
The car departed with 45% state of charge with a 112 mile range indicated and arrived with a 29% state of charge with a 77 mile range indicated. Interestingly the Taycan’s range estimate was pretty spot on being only 1 mile off.
Considering I got 36 miles for about 16% state of charge I’d have around 225 miles of range with this style of driving.
In the Tesla I did a 25 mile highway drive with similar conditions and speeds. Not trying to hyper mile, not trying to push, just keeping up with the general flow of traffic.
The Tesla left with a 58% state of charge and 169 miles of indicated range and arrived with a 48% state of charge and 140 miles of indicated range. The Tesla’s range estimate was a bit less accurate in this particular scenario, but not offensively so. If I were to extrapolate the 10% state of charge per 25 miles of range I would end up with about 250 miles of range with this style of driving.
Lastly I took both cars on an identical 30 mile canyon run loop. The goal here was to push each car about as hard as I felt comfortable doing. So it included several full throttle accelerations, and just lots of aggressive driving.
The Taycan departed with a 49% state of charge and 132 miles of indicated range and returned with a 28% state of charge and 82 miles left of indicated range. Given the approximate 21% stage of charge loss per 30 miles the Taycan could expect to get around 150 miles of range with this style of driving.
The Tesla departed with a 76% state of charge and 221 miles of indicated range and returned with a 61% state of charge and 177 miles of indicated range. Given the Tesla’s 15% state of charge loss per 30 miles one could expect to get around 190 miles of range with this style of driving.
My general takeaway is the Taycan can hold its own on the highway when driving normally, but the Taycan seems to dump energy much faster than the Tesla when driving aggressively. Likewise, though the Tesla seems to subtract its indicated mileage much faster per state of charge percentage, the Tesla is subtracting from a larger number of miles altogether at around 300 miles of range so you don’t feel like you’re really in any range trouble until you get to the 50 mile mark or so. Whereas in the Taycan you can hit that 50 mile remaining number much more readily and feel the range anxiety set in.
I actually think a big issue with the Taycan is how readily it dumps power when you do push it in a canyon environment. I sometimes have to drive 40 miles to a canyon or twisty road so I can see the Taycan dumping a substantial amount of charge in the canyon itself and not having enough juice to get back.
As a whole I’d probably have to think about range a bit more in the Taycan than I would in the Tesla so the Tesla is the winner here, but I do think I could get the Taycan to work for a lot of situations that I normally encounter.
Cargo Space/Practicality (Model 3 vs Taycan)
A big appeal of the Taycan is the notion of having a pretty sporty driving experience without having to quite sacrifice all of the space that one would in a traditional sports car. While the Taycan does an admirable job on this front the Model 3 does edge it out by a noticeable margin.
I have (5) bags that I keep in my car at all times for work. In the Tesla these are split between the frunk, trunk, and under trunk storage. While things can get tight in the Tesla between these bags I can arrange them in a way where I still have room for something else or a few grocery bags if necessary.
While the Taycan did accommodate all (5) bags it felt maxed out once I got them all in there and I had to arrange the trunk in a particular way to get everything to fit so the trunk could close whereas that is not necessary on the Tesla.
Critically the Taycan’s frunk actually looks to have more storage potential than the Model 3’s thanks to its extra depth, however several of my bags were just ever so slightly too wide to make use of that extra depth. This is likely an inches vs centimeters thing and some slightly different sized bags would likely solve the problem, but I do think it’s something other folks with bags that use Imperial dimensions would run into.
Surprisingly both the frunk and trunk in the Tesla are much nicer to operate compared to the Taycan’s.
The Taycan’s frunk requires you to slide a safety latch to open it while neither the Tesla or Corvette’s frunk requires this. Likewise Tesla’s powered lift gate appears to move faster, does not make an annoying “beeping” noise as it is closing, and the hard plastic interior liner on the backside of Tesla’s trunk is much nicer than the Taycan’s carpeted liner.
Inside the cabin the Tesla has much more space for the rear seats as well as more leg and head room. Likewise the Tesla’s center console offers loads of storage potential plus convenient wireless charging for two. Whereas the Taycan has a janky wireless charger included (that is hard to access and didn’t seem to work for me) and much more limited storage options throughout the cabin.
This isn’t to say that the Taycan’s storage offerings wouldn’t work for most people. But a Tesla owner would have to make decisions about what to not include if moving into a Taycan. There’s something to be said about the Model 3 having smaller dimensions all around and more space to put stuff.
Parking Lot/Tight Spaces (all three)
I personally work in downtown LA frequently and have to navigate my car through tight parking areas and other urban gems. Likewise, I find that parking lots can generally be stressful, especially in nicer cars like a Corvette or Taycan, so an ease of navigating through them does make a marked difference in one’s overall enjoyment.
Here I would say the Taycan and Model 3 are a dead heat whereas the Corvette is a few steps behind both cars.
I have a particular turn around point in my neighborhood cul-de-sac that I consistently have to navigate through. Both the Taycan and Model 3 were able to clear the turn around point at comparable distances whereas the Corvette had to do a 3-point turn.
Supposedly the Corvette has a tighter turn radius than the outgoing C7 but it honestly does not feel that way to me. In tight quarters or parking lot situations, the Corvette feels like it’s a bit helpless to maneuver and I’ve had myself get into trouble with it on a few occasions. Nothing particularly damning or impossible to get out of, but instances where cars are looking at me and are wondering why I’m not making a turn when their car feels like it has enough space in the parking lot.
The Tesla does feel a bit easier to place due to its smaller size and I also find that its parking sensors and rear view camera do a lot to assist you. The Model 3 is frankly the easiest car I’ve had to park and I have no complaints about its turning radius, size, etc. in these situations.
Considering the Taycan’s extra dimensions its turning radius feels like it’s better than the Tesla’s inch for inch, but the extra dimensions do make it a bit less seamless to place and the cameras/driver assistance features do not work consistently enough to rely on. But you can park the car without being too far off the mark of the Model 3, and you are nowhere near the silly situations that can be encountered in the Corvette.
While my particular rental did not have rear axle steering equipped, I do feel like a rear axle steering equipped Taycan would be comparable to place compared to a Model 3 on all accounts and the Taycan without rear axle steering was plenty easy to generally park and maneuver around parking lots despite its size.
Traffic/Daily Driving Comfort (Model 3 vs Taycan)
So this is a major point of emphasis for me between Model 3 and Taycan because I do find myself driving in all sorts of traffic conditions and just need the car to be easy to deal with no matter what I encounter.
The Tesla is a smaller vehicle, has a default ride height that basically never scrapes, has a very helpful nav and parking sensors, and things like one pedal drive and auto hold make for a very “zen-like” driving experience. I’ve basically never encountered a driving situation that made me feel uncomfortable in my Tesla. Likewise the smaller size and instantaneous torque makes it very easy to just slot oneself in wherever needed.
The Taycan is a larger vehicle and it does not offer a one pedal driving mode, both of which made me worry about the Taycan’s overall comfort. However I actually did not miss one pedal driving nearly as much as I thought I would on the Taycan. The lack of one pedal drive allows the car to just glide along somewhat effortlessly, and though you do need to be more aware as a driver, it somehow feels less frenetic than the Tesla. I can’t say it’s preferable to one pedal driving, but it works well enough that I don’t mind not having one pedal driving accessible in the Taycan.
I had a harder time slotting the Taycan into tight spaces compared to the Tesla. This is partially because of the Taycan’s size and partially because its throttle response is not as instantaneous. Likewise, I did have to be mindful of ride height in certain situations, which did add a layer of stress that I am not as used to anymore in my daily commute.
Something about the Taycan does feel like it protects you from the outside world a bit more than the Tesla. The ride is a lot more insulated, helping you arrive in a fresher state and the car drives in a way where it feels like it never really has to assert itself. In the Tesla I feel like I often have to get scrappy to get myself into a position that I’d like, but the Taycan never really calls for it.
Visibility between the Taycan and Tesla is pretty comparable, but the Taycan’s mirrors do feel like they are in a better position to see behind you, and the blind spot warning system gives you an immediate level of awareness that the Tesla does not offer.
After going back and forth between both cars the Taycan’s steering across all modes feels a bit more weighty and effortful. This becomes a disadvantage on the streets because you do feel this steering weight along with the car’s actual weight when making tighter maneuvers, but on the highway the Taycan feels much more sure footed and its steering works better there compared to the Tesla’s.
As an odd point of consideration, I do think the Tesla is a nicer cabin to be in when the car’s not moving. It feels a little more spacious and I’ve had no problems working on my laptop in the front seat or taking a nap in the rear seat. I think taking a nap in the rear seat of a Taycan would be hard to accomplish because of how the rear seat is shaped. While the front seat offers plenty of space to work if needed, the car generally feels like it wants you to drive it, whereas the Tesla is okay with you hanging out in it. However the Taycan actually feels like the nicer to cabin to be in when you are moving. That protection and insolation from the outside world just really gives you a sense of comfort and escape which is nice.
A big thing that helps the Taycan is the fact that it does have a “hold” feature if you press the brake pedal down strongly when at a stop. Now the Tesla can do this for you every single time your car comes to a stop, but I found that being able to have the option to “hold” in the Taycan was a minor tipping point in daily driving/comfort that helps it compared to the Tesla.
All in all I’d say the Tesla wins this particular category. But the Taycan is not as far off in this category as I remember it being.
Highway Driving (all three)
The Taycan is the best highway driver of the three. It is smooth, well insulated, and happy to give you a strong shove of torque no matter what speed you are going on the highway. One of my worries with the Taycanwas the lack of one pedal driving making it feel less comfortable to drive on the highway, but I actually found its auto recuperation mode to be a big win.
Auto Recuperation essentially allows the car to coast when it is not near other vehicles, helping to optimize range, but when it is near vehicles it adds regen and frictional braking to help keep a safe distance. With this on I found that I actually had to touch the pedals less than I had to when in the Tesla, and found that the system did a good job keeping me at safe distances and generally out of trouble.
The Tesla is the next best of the bunch. It does have noticeably louder wind and road noises at highway speeds, but it has a punchy torque delivery from 60-80mph which makes it very easy to slot itself into small gaps in the highway. However the Tesla’s power does seem to fall off past 80mph compared to the Taycan. One pedal driving on the Tesla is very much a treat, as it makes it very easy to respond to changing road conditions (just take your foot off the pedal and you’ve scrubbed 10mph off your speed in a few seconds). Likewise in stop and go traffic situations it makes everything very easy and comfortable to manage. However you do find yourself having to constantly apply the throttle pedal to maintain highway speeds. So while the Tesla does a great job on the highway, the Taycan feels like it is much more optimized for it as a whole.
The Corvette is very comfortable on the highway thanks to its adaptive dampers and you can tell that it’s a car that is happy to eat miles for you. I’d say it’s definitely one of the easiest and most relaxing sports cars to take on a longer road trip. Unfortunately, you begin to really miss EV torque when on the highway with the Corvette. You can drop a few gears, rev like crazy, get yourself up 100mph and it feels like nothing happened compared to how much instantaneous torque the Taycan and Model 3 offer at highway speeds. Likewise I’m often happy to push the Model 3 to higher speeds on the highway because of how quiet the car is, but past 80mph the Corvette’s style and exhaust essentially announces “Come look at me I’m breaking the law!” or in some people’s eyes “I’m a douchebag”. So you do have to be much more mindful of your throttle usage.
The Corvette does also have an odd size and seating position that just makes it hard to really feel confident shooting a gap on the highway. So the lack of instantaneous torque and its odd shape/size makes it the least enjoyable highway cruiser, though it still does an incredible job for an ICE sports car and is by no means bad by other measures.
Conclusion:
So can the Taycan best a C8 Model 3 Combo?
The Taycan’s driving experience really is good enough where it is an incredibly tempting proposition. I personally think you get very close to the experience of how a Corvette cuts up canyons, with a lot of the convenience and practicality you’d expect from an EV. In my eyes it's currently as close as you can get to a sports car while having 4 doors. For me a big source of its appeal is being able to experience the speed and specialness of the Corvette a lot more frequently in day to day driving scenarios and to experience that speed in a way that draws a lot less attention and feels generally safer on the streets.
However this math only makes sense looking at the used market. Used Taycan Turbo and 4S models can be had for $110Kish, and really the Taycan Turbo is the one to make a move on at that price range. However at around $140K new for say a well optioned 4S the C8 and Model 3 combo makes more sense.
All in all the Taycan really is the first proper "do it all" car that I have encountered and I think we have a lot to look forward to with a plethora of of EV options coming to market soon.

The soldiers lined on Ardenholms beaches. Their bright, jewel encrusted armor flashed brightly in the glaring summers sun. The warriors were eager to get on with their game of conquering and subjugating. They were Ardenholmites, Humilauians, and Pommedorans, as well as Tuberite religious warriors hailing from Solanum. They were gathered in Ardenholm to prepare for an imminent invasion from Veritas and their leader, BB.
Ardenholm, Humilau and especially Pommedora were in open rebellion from BB. They thought of him as a tyrannical leader, levying heavy taxes and other unreasonable demands. They finally decided to declare themselves separate from BB, but the turmoil quickly devolved into a fight for control of the entire island chain.
Pommedora was a Tuberist nation, so they called upon their Solanarian brothers to help the fight. The Tuberists, thinking it would be an easy battle, happily joined in.
As the Tuberites made the short voyage to Pommedora, tensions arose. There was an attempt to reestablish diplomatic relations which quickly broke down, resulting in a raid from Veritas on Pommedora, their closest neighbor.
The Tuberites arrived far too late to join the fray, but fortunately the raid was mostly scared off before any real fighting could occur, and the casualties were 6 in Pommedora, after a single arrow barrage and 8 Veritasian raiders who brought their boat too close to the walls and were sunk by a well placed explosive firework.
Thus began an alarmingly fast arms race. Both sides were on islands, so a full force invasion was not viable…yet. Seemingly overnight the once windswept and backwater islands in rebellion turned to industry. The once salty and warm air choked with the smoke from the flames of fires roaring in their mighty hearths. Peaceful and sunny harbors because overrun with heavy bots of war.
Veritas kept pace with the industrial might and the islands were equal in strength. Both bought mercenaries to fight, but Veritas gained a significant upper hand by taking a hefty loan from bankers overseas and buying much better metals than could ever be reaped from the earth on the barren island chain.
Finally the mines were depleted of what little resources they could muster. Though bright earthen metals were occasionally still warm from being melted and pounded into their molds.
With no more brawn games to play, both sides made a quick shift to mind games. Spies. Spies everywhere. In the streets. In the factories. In the harbors. Everywhere. Private conversations became public knowledge overnight. The town square of Ardenholm ran red with the blood of those suspected of treason.
Next came the starvation. The already small fields had been neglected because the farmers had been made to become factory workers. This time, the rebellion got the upper hand, with the Tuberists providing food from their vast fields back in Solanaria. Veritas attempted a naval blockade to stop the shipment of food from arriving. The Tuberists didn’t slow down. The naval commander ordered them to hold. The Tuberists, already very near to the maximum pace, almost appeared to speed up. Finally they stopped just outside of cannon range. They waited in a locked stalemate for 3 days until the Veritasians ran out of water and were forced to return to port. Thus, they spent the winter on meager rations and had to sell some of their newly bought steel to pay for food.
Finally, after a long and cold winter of light eating and intense stare-offs, the spring blossomed in the remaining fields.
The Veritasians had survived the winter by the skin of their teeth and knew that they could not survive another winter. This years winter had been astoundingly warm (by West Phagosian standards). In fact, this was the warmest winter ever recorded.
Over on Pommedora, which at this point had been established as the capital, the situation was almost as grim. The Tuberists, who were creeping up on a years time spent on an island were becoming increasingly obstinate and downright treasonous. They longed to go back to their homeland, and run on green fields, with gently rolling hills bordered by lush, fertile marshes, encased by the great mountains far to the west, just where the eye could see them. They downright despised the cramped island.
Tensions were starting to boil over on all sides of the war, until finally the spy game did its job. The Pommedorans received definitive proof that the Veritasians would be sailing for a “surprise” attack on Ardenholm in one months time. This was the break they needed and with this knowledge they could easily win the war.
Under the cover of darkness they began to very slowly and methodically ship soldier to Ardenholm. They arrived on mail boats and pleasure crafts, in wine barrels and tiny crude rafts. Simultaneously, these same craft evacuated the women and children, bringing them safely to Pommedora.
Then, the day before the battle, an idea was had. It was decided that instead of defending the city they should go on the offensive while the opposing military was away. The idea was they would go quickly to Veritas and slay BB, and then swiftly bring his head back over to Ardenholm where his army, seeing that they had nothing to fight for, would surrender.
There were problems with this plan, though. The entire army was already on Ardenholm, and Pommedora was still the closest island to Veritas, so it would make no sense to keep an army anywhere but there. Also, the ships would probably sail right by each other on their way to conquer their respective islands.
“None the matter with these details” said the commanders, “This plan is too good to pass up.”
And thus we pick up where we started, with the solders, armed to the teeth, sitting in the early morning sun, waiting for their boats to take them to Veritas.
They boarded and set off. 1/10 of the army was left behind to There was nothing but excitement as they lost sight of the shore. The soldiers were tremendously confident in their plan.
The boats sailed for 38 minutes without interruption.
Suddenly, a lookout sounded their horn. The soldiers instantaneously switched from their excited and eager chatter to silence as they looked on the horizon, expecting to see a fleet of opposing ships.
Instead they saw a tiny island. Barely even an island. More like a sad sandbar. The entire island was completely covered in Veritasian troops. They were all standing on the island, their bodies facing the fleet. They were all watching the fleet sail by.
All wielded a dull blue trident, the color of cold and drear ocean
Then one, the commander most likely, stepped forth and walked slowly to the edge of the shore, about 10 feet. He stopped at the edge and dipped the pronged fork of his trident into the water
Not a single eye strayed from his trident as it leapt to life. It’s dull and sad color replaced by an electric blue. The blue started from where the water touched the prongs and snaked down the trident at a decently fast pace.
Then he did the most unexpected thing of all, and fell face first into the water. All eyes remained on where he fell. The seconds ticked by. 15. 30. 60. 90. Was he dead? 120. Then at 133 exactly he sprang from the water. His right hand clamped so tightly around his trident his knuckles were bleached like dead coral. He sailed 50 meters in the air, well above the masts of the boats, and about 150 meters towards the boats.
Then his army all seemingly sprang to life and walked swiftly to the waters edge. It was a trap! They didn’t pause for dramatic effect like he did, diving headfirst into the water and sailing through the air with almost no delay.
The archers attempted to ready their bows but the boats were already packed tight with men, horses, cannons, and all sorts of equipment of war.
The tridenteers sprang forth and plunged into the ocean like rain. A hundred a twenty, they numbered. They rapidly began closing the distance. The archers pulled back their bows and waited for them to get into firing range. They quickly closed in. Finally, they were in shooting distance and they fired. None of the shots struck. In fact, none even came close. The soldiers were simply too small to hit accurately, especially from a rocking boat.
The tridenteers then passed overhead, and did the most unexpected thing of all. A few reached into their pouches and pulled out a single gray stick about the size of a baton. They then dropped them.
All of the tridenteers possessed 8 of these sticks, so most waited until they had clear shots to drop. A few thought they did right then, and threw their sticks towards the ships.
All except one missed. It was tremendously hard to fire accurately while trying to dodge projectiles.
The one that didn’t miss sailed down, down, down until it landed barely on the port side of a medium sized Humilauian cruiser. The wood of the boat was no match for the explosion that rang out. The front port side was torn. The water spout produced from the explosion went 15 meters into the air.
The ship sank in 2 minutes.
Immediately it’s neighboring boats turned sharply to rescue the screaming survivors. The tridenteers passed about a kilometer away from the boats before veering to the left and turning to made another pass.
The ships were thoroughly spooked, and most moved to do evasive maneuvers.
Suddenly, three powerful horn blasts rang out. This was the sign to press forth. The ships readjusted course to fan out, but 9 blasts rang out, the sign to stick together.
A second pass was made with 2 ships sunk. Another pass was made, but no ships were sunk. Than another with no ships. Another with 1. Another with 1. Another with none. This continued until 87 passes were made. There were 137 boats in total at the beginning, 7 large, 38 medium and 94 small. 93 remained. There were 4 large boats remaining (the 3 that were sunk had been sunk at the very beginning), 15 medium boats, and 75 small boats. Almost all of the surviving medium and large boats had tied themselves together with rope and formed a sort of floating pontoon. This greatly increased the sailing time, and a journey of 3 hours took 6.
Not all of the ships that were lost had sunk. Of the 19 small boats that were not present in the final fleet, only 2 had actually been sunk.
There had been a sort of mutiny aboard some of the smaller boats after the 8th pass. 2 of the 7 large boats had been hit and were sinking and the situation was looking very dire. In the rear, 9 of the small boats and 8 of the medium boats (the medium boats were the very end of the fleet) all mutinied against their captains, with three being stabbed to death and one being cast into the sea and turned around back to Ardenholm. Watching them sail away nearly caused the entire fleet to break apart but they were guided by a common foe.
A few of the boats lagged behind. 4 medium boats couldn’t keep pace due to being non-fatally struck and turned around. The tridenteers were given orders to at least damage the ships heavily enough to force them to turn around, so they allowed those ships to flee.
3 small ships, in an interesting turn of fate, were nearest to the islands when the bombing started. They were the ones who had sounded the alarm. The tridenteers had passed over them entirely without dropping a single bomb. They were still horrified watching the preliminary carnage before the ships could form up, and decided to run themselves aground on the tiny island the Veritasians had started out in.
They hid under the 6 palm trees for 8 days, not knowing anything about the status of any of the nations. They survived by eating the horses they had brought and drinking the wine they had brought which they were going to celebrate with once the island of Veritas was conquered.
Finally, after 6 hours, the boats sighted Veritas. The midday sun was high in the air and the archers could not see the trident wielders through the sun, accelerating their losses.
Veritas looked abandoned. The alarm has been raised but very few troops were on the walls, looking very frightened.
The soldiers let out a halfhearted cheer upon laying eyes on the island. The Veritasian tridents veered right after the fleet made their way into the smooth natural harbor.
The tridenteers had only lost 11. 7 from lucky bow shots, 3 from the binding from their wrists to their tridents slipping off, and 1 stupid soldier who tried to land on a small boat and was instantly slain.
The boats neared the docks of Veritas. The harbor wasn’t much of a harbor at all, only having a narrow wave-breaking sandspit that only extended past a third of the docks.
The boats made passes towards the docks, with some soldiers being so desperate to get off of them they leaped from the boats and swam to shore.
The boats all started to unload as normal, with horses being placed on the shore and equipment to breach the great gate of Veritas being unloaded
Suddenly the great gate of Veritas, which was expected to be a large obstacle swung open and half of Veritas’s army (still a formidable number mind you) roared forth, banging their shields, and sprinted at the unprepared rebels.
This was not expected at all, and no precautions for this had been taken. The rebels on the beach all turned to run back to the boats when, alas! The tridenteers reappeared from out of nowhere behind the boats. They hurtled towards the crafts, flying much more recklessly now, and dropped their bombs. The boats were not moving or fighting back this time and 8 were struck.
In the same run, 47 of the tridenteers dropped their explosives on top of the docks, blowing all except two up. Those two would be decommissioned in the next run.
This mostly stranded the peoples on the shore, whose only option now was the rowboats from the large ships. Some ran towards those but right then the charging army from the gates slammed into those on the shore.
18 rowboats were cast off, from the beach and the rest were not able to and were scuttled. The battle for the beach was a terrible situation for the rebels with them being completely pinned against the sea.
The battle lasted 15 minutes. There was no command from any officers due to most still being present on the boats. No definitive line was formed up and many men swam out to sea to try to wait out the slaughter. Most men threw their weapons on the ground and begged for mercy.
1/6 of the seaborn army was slain and 1/6 of the army surrendered on the beach, totaling 1/3 of invasion, or exactly 642 men.
The boats tried to leave the harbor but all tried to leave at once and a few collisions occurred. The boats that made it out were harassed by the tridenteers the entire time. A few tridenteers were observed landing on the decks of boats and stabbing sailors as they tried to get the boats under control before running away
To top it off, the winds were blowing in an awful direction and most of the boats were blown far to the right. They nearly crashed into an unwalled peninsula. The horn of orders was silent because the ship they were on had taken a direct hit and was rapidly sinking. The commander of the entire operation, on that ship, had died instantly in the blast. The entire senior commanding force had migrated to that boat during the trident harassment because it was centrally located and the safest option. None of the senior officers survived, as the bomb quite literally split the ship in two, and as they were gathered midship below the upper decks they had either been torn up from wood splinters or went down with the ship and were drowned.
Due to the lack of orders, all ships had their own idea of what to do. Most of them thought that the wind was far too unfavorable to set into open water so decided to land on the peninsula. About 1/3 decided to try the winds and sailed in various directions to various islands. This time, the tridenteers could harass them all they wanted and most would not get far. One tridenteer was assigned per boat, which ended up being a large blunder on Veritas's part because most were out of ammunition and could not do any damage.
Those who landed on the peninsula were met with an immediate problem. Unloading. Most of the men jumped overboard to swim to shore and some ships went completely unmanned before being either sunk or captured by the opposing force. Some men who didn't take of their armor were weighed down by it and drowned. The same happened for the archers, who's quivers filled completely with water instead of arrows, and if they were unable to get the quiver off they drowned.
There was one final factor that was at play. The peninsula itself. It was very long and narrow. So narrow that a tridenteer could safely jump all the way over it without being dashed apart on the rocks.
A single tridenteer sprang fourth. Their bright blue trident electric against the sky, which was growing progressively cloudier. They reached into their pocket and pulled out one of the sticks. They lazily let it go before safely landing in the water on the other side.
They didn’t even have to aim. It exploded on the top right corner of the peninsula and some were caught in the blast.
The other tridenteers followed suit. There were only 26 archers still armed as almost all of them had either abandoned their gear or were weighed down by it trying to swim over.
The entire peninsula was scourged. The walls extended to the beach on either side, and the coast became far too treacherous and rocky to swim around.
40% of the entire army was slain on the peninsula. A further 20% (of the men on the peninsula) surrendered and only 19 men escaped. 9 on a rowboat that was let go because of its irrelevance and 10 somehow survived the swim around the walls and ran up the island before stealing a sailboat and escaping.
Those that turned around and fled immediately suffered casualties, but not to the scale of this. About 5% of the army died on the sail back from getting picked off. Most of the tridenteers ran out of ammunition.
A grand total of 67% of the army perished in this advancement. A further 14% surrendered and of those, 1% died in prison from disease or starvation. 1,531 men in total lost their lives.
As for the boats, of the ones that made it to Veritas, none of the large ships survived, 4 of the medium ships made it back (2 were captured, 9 sank) and 29 of the small ships made it back (38 sunk, 8 captured). Of the 18 rowboats that were on the beach during the initial beach attack, 15 landed on the peninsula, with the other three rowing all the way to Pommedora.
Those that escaped ended up on all manner of islands in the surrounding area. One boat drifted with only one man on board for 8 days. He too survived off of horseflesh but also was lucky enough to get rainwater.
The other half of Veritas’s army had taken a longer route to Ardenholm. Ardenholm somehow managed to pull off an astonishing victory, despite being outnumbered 5-1. They were helped by the crew that had mutinied initially. They made use of their thick walls and used a turtle strategy to wait for help, until after 24 hours when they realized that something had gone seriously wrong they then went on a sudden offensive catching the Veritasian army completely by surprise because they had grown used to not being shot at.
The Ardenholm fighters used bows and a ridiculously large pile of arrows to shoot at the invaders non-stop until they finally gave up and went home. They were significantly hampered by not having the other half of their army. Both sides suffered relatively minor casualties, with Ardenholm losing 19 men and Veritas losing exactly 100.
Veritas lost 58 of their 120 tridenters, with the vast majority being lost by flying too close to the boats and being shot with arrows. Interestingly, 82% of those that landed on boats to stab individual sailors would perish. Their army suffered a loss total of 329.
This defeat left the rebels in shock. Their entire standing army had been effectively wiped out. They would start having to recruit younger men and paying more for mercenaries.
The Tuberists had taken the highest casualty rate, with an unimaginable 80% casualty rate and 16% captured. Only 4%, or just 16 men on one small boat, which they never left, managed to make it back. When the elder potatoes learned about this, they were understandably shocked and devastated and justifiably withdrew all future support to the rebellion. They claimed that the Tuberites had been used as cannon fodder and that that was an stupidly high casualty rate for a defensive mission. They had lost every single one of their ranking officers they had sent on that mission and demanded insanely high rates of compensation. It wasn’t until the battle was thoroughly explained and they were promised that all the islands would convert to Tuberism that they agreed to help once more.
The defeat didn't spell doom for the rebels, but would certainly go on to hamper their future efforts.
And that is the story of one of the worst strategical blunders in Stoneworks history.
This story is based around the truth. Ardenholm was indeed attacked by Veritas and BB after rebelling with Pommedora and Humilau. The Tuberists did indeed help out for religious reasons. There was indeed a failed charge counterattack which was poorly planned and the casualty numbers are accurate if you combine the dead and captured and just consider them all dead. The Veritasians did indeed use tridents to pick most of us off, and I myself died. This would have easily cost us the battle as we lost 80% of our total gear and didn’t really have enough time to make a proper repot. We used the good old 0-armor-stone-axe-rush strategy and only won because they placed capture points underwater which is illegal. So yeah the next battle is in a week (I think) and we have a LOT of grinding to do haha.
Also Stoney hmu if you ever want any scriptwriting help. I love to do this.
If you read this far um gg I guess
- lnedible

• M103: A classic heavy tank. It can go hulldown, but the turret cheeks are quite weak to some tanks. The playstyle is also quite boring to me, but overall its still a nice tank. 6/10
  
• M5 Yoh: Great gun choices, but I prefer the three shot gun on this tank, unlike the tier 10, cus the two shot gun on this tank loads way too long. Great turret armor as long as u hide the hatch, alright speed. Overall a great tank. 8/10
  
• T54E1: Now, b4 u call me a noob, I view this as a tier 9 T57 Heavy but a bit more mobile, so I often play it like the T57. Amazing gun but the lack of HE kinda sucks. Armor can bounce sometimes, but its basically unprotected (like the T57). Overall a great heavium. 9/10
  
• T30: lets be real, after 10.0 its basically a heavy. great turret, incredible gun that punches so fken hard for a tier 9, and the buffed speed is rlly good too. the gun can miss sometimes but when it hits, man it hits hard. 10/10
  
• VK 45.02 B: a rather unique side scrape heavy at tier 9. it is definitely a fun tank to play for me w the incredible side scrape ability it has. the speed isnt that great tho. 8/10
  
• Mauschen: honestly, german super heavies arent my thing. the tank is too slow, and the armor doesnt hold up that much in this meta. stock grind is also a pain in the butt. its a great special mode tank tho. 5/10
  
• E75: its a nice tank. armor isnt as effective as the Tiger II’s but the gun hits pretty damn hard. it is also quite mobile. i kinda like it, its not a hard tank to play. 8/10
  
• IS-8: i dont understand the hate on this tank. its fantastic. the speed, the mobility, its just amazingly fast for a heavy. the gun performs rlly well too. sure, it doesnt have armor, but its not supposed to take shots in the first place. great tank. 9/10
  
• ST-1: its an alright tank. nice gun, great armor that can be trollish sometimes, and alright speed. its like the E75 but a lil bit more challenging to play. 7/10
  
• Conqueror: its a fantastic tank honestly. the new HESH gun it received some time ago rlly made the tank my top pick when i wanna play a tier 9. just imagine pounding tier 8s for 515 dmg every single shot. the speed boost it has also makes it fken strong. my favorite tier 9 heavy. 10/10
  
• Type 68: its a nice tank. the mobility equipment it gets makes a difference for me. the turret buff it got helps a lot too. the gun depression can be frustrating sometimes, but hey i brought that upon myself so i cant complain lol. 8.5/10
  
• WZ 111 1-4: what can i say, its an IS-8 w a better gun. fantastic gun w high 460 alpha, great speed, plus some armor too. 9/10
  
• AMX 50 120: before 10.0 i would rate this piece of shit a 5/10 bcus the armor sucks and the intraclip is slow, but with the introduction of a 4 shot gun and a better 3 shot gun, i rlly enjoy it more. the new 2.7s intraclip makes a huge difference. i like this tank. 8.5/10
  
• CC 1 Mk2: yea its basically a heavy. great alpha and its nice to have an autoreloader too, but i feel like the reserve shell mechanic kills it. its also slow and the armor isnt that great either. just an alright tank for me. 7/10
  
• Emil 2: this one is much better than the Italian TD hybrid. very nice autoreloader system with no reserve shell mechanic, making it not become useless after emptying the clip. nice turret armor and great mobility w the speed boost. 9/10
  
• 50TP: its a nice tank. nice gun, great armor, alrighty mobility, and tungsten shells. the blow it delivers with tungsten shells is just absolutely amazing. i rlly enjoyed this tank and this line in general. 8.5/10
  
• Vz.51: the newest tech tree tank. it is quite similar to the IS-8 in a way. it has nice speed for a heavy, great turret armor, and the aiming mechanic comes in handy. its nothing special, just overall an enjoyable tank. 8/10
  
• WZ 114: china’s first super heavy. it is probably my least favorite premium/ collectors heavy tank. great alpha damage, nice super consumables, but the speed and the armor it has isnt that great. 6/10
  
• 50TP Prototyp: i dont understand why this thing is so much faster than the 50TP in return for 20 less alpha damage. great armor too. the hell wg? 9.5/10
  
• KPz 70: i love this tank. its the T30 that traded some alpha for great speed. insane turret armor. 560 alpha damage is also fken lovely on a tier 9 heavy. 10/10
  
• Regressor: so if u take the 50TP Proto’s speed and pair it w the 50TP’s gun and armor, and then u slap the Czech heavies’ mechanic on top of it, u get this tank. u gotta pay up for this tank bcus yea, wargaming amirite? NP/10 (NP = Not played)
  
• AE Phase 1: nice tank. i dont have it so idk much abt it. it seems like a better M103 tho. NP/10
  
• TL-7-120: im not a fan of this. no armor, same gun as M103, alright speed. but the tumor on its head is so huge and unarmored. 5/10
  
• K-91: a nice tank, but i cant put my finger on it. the 3.5s intraclip rlly makes the tank meh for me. prolly skill issue on my end. 6/10
  
• Obj 752: this thing has great armor, great alpha damage w a two shot autoloader w nice dpm too. also nice speed. its such a good tank. i fucking love it ngl. 10/10
  
• Obj 452K: no info, but stats seems promising. armor seems good, nice gun. basically a traditional heavy i think. NP/10
  

Next
​
Victor turned around for one more look at what had been his childhood home. It was a three bedroom apartment on the four hundred thirty third floor in the Manchester district of the hive city New Avalon. It did at least have one window facing the outside of the hive, which made it an instant selling point.For which he was glad, it was part of his new inheritance from his parents who had recently died in the latest rounds of terrorist bombings against Canary Corps headquarters, which they both were middle management.
His military leave was coming to an end, his amassed two week respite was only due to his twenty years of service in the imperial guard. As a Captain and veteran of the Emperors many campaigns, he could pull rank when needed.
In five short years he would be able to retire a full citizen. Something his father scoffed at, but that was nothing new, his father scoffed at anything he had ever done. His everything ached, as he turned his back on his former home and made his way towards the transmat pad. Selling the apartment and consolidating his assets weren’t the only thing he was doing on Terra.
He spent those two weeks getting augments that would have been out of reach to a lowly Captain of the Imperial guard. Gene-mods were common throughout the Empire, but there were gene-mods, and then there were gene-mods. His were now top of the line, far beyond the mil-spec given to him in officer school. That, combined with his new dimensional storage add-on allowed him to purchase and store massive amounts of goods for his upcoming retirement.
Some things you could only get on Holy Terra, a nano-forge capable of making anything you have a SBC to construct could be found on most technological worlds. A nano-foundry to make the nanites the nano-forge uses can only be purchased on select worlds of the Empire.
But SBCs can only be found on Terra, and are heavily restricted. But some connections in Imperial Guard logistics pointed him to some people who might have some SBCs that may or may not be considered illegal to own. That combined with raw materials, a habitat module, weapons, food, mining drones, security drones, and forge spiders now filled his dimensional storage.
“Next!” Shouted a bored looking transmat officer in front of Victor. To which he sighed and presented his Imperial Guard ID and his permissions to be transported to Andosious Prime. The officer looked him over in his Imperial Guard Armor, a bit battle worn, but impeccably maintained. It felt much lighter with the upgrades, which was the point. Two hundred kilos of light power armor is still heavy even with the minor gene-mods of the guard. Now he barely felt it as he stood before the officer.
“No baggage Captain Cane?” He asked looking down at this console.Victor kept his face emotionless, something driven into him by officer training. “The guard provides me with all I need officer. No baggage today.” He lied through his teeth.
The officer nodded, that was the proper response, “Thank you for your service Captain, next stop, Andosious Prime!” He said with a flourish as he pressed a button on his panel.The universe went white, time fell away, then he felt like he was falling. This wasn’t what normally happened on a transmat. Suddenly the world came back into focus, blue sky followed by a green forest followed by a brown ground coming up fast.
His mental commands screamed through the interface nodes imbedded all over his body into the scout armor. Retro-rockets fired as he made a hard landing in the clearing of a forest. Two weeks earlier something like that would have hurt bad, if not caused serious injury. Now it just added to his aches.
He looked around, his heads-up display noting the fauna, surprisingly it came back as all Terra based equivalents. Well, they would have been if most of them didn’t say EXTINCT beside their classification in red.
“Captain Cane to Guard unit 117154, please respond.” The hud responded with something he had never seen before. NO SIGNAL.
“What the hell?” He asked himself. He had never been without a signal. “Computer, run diagnostics, maybe the transmat damaged something.” He watched as the diagnostic finished running, no errors, no signal.
He looked up, the sun would be going down in a few hours, he could use the celestial navigation software in his armor to find his location anywhere in the galaxy. Emperor above, he hoped the transmat hadn’t put him on a Xeno world.
He activated his jump pack to launch himself up for a better view of the land. About a thousand meters up he saw smoke coming from a medium sized village… maybe? He could work with that, maybe he was in a non-technological world of the Empire, even those had outposts to get a signal out from.
The jump pack’s capacitors would need to recharge before he could use it again. Nothing to do but start walking towards the village. With any luck he would reach it before nightfall, from there he’d get some answers.
He did not get to the village before nightfall. The terrain made going slow, the ground was soft and muddy, the forest was densely packed with oak trees and rocks. He had to use his jump pack to clear a particularly deep gully and it was slowly recharging.
As he looked down on the village he remembered his navigation software, he looked up to the sky and let the computer gather data. Location confirmed, Holy Terra, New Avalon, District 334.He sighed and looked back down to the village, “Either my suit is borked, or I’m back in the distant past.” He muttered. His armors’ limited AI printed something new on his hud. CONSTELLATIONS OUT OF SYNC BY 4271 YEARS.
Victor froze at the revelation. All the physics classes he took in his youth stated going back in time was impossible, something about paradoxes prevented it. “Computer, do you have any information on transmat failures?” The AI showed it was indexing before coming back with an answer, LOST MATTER IN TRANSMAT HAS ALWAYS BEEN PUSHED PAST THE FINITE CURVE OF THE UNIVERSE. NO FURTHER INFORMATION AVAILABLE.
Victor sat on a tree stump taking in the information. “Well, I’m not in the Empire anymore, even if the computer thinks I am. Nothing to do but head down to the village.” He pushed up from the stump and made his way in the dark towards the oddly ancient eastern looking village.
There was a road leading into the village, a sign stood crookedly at the crossroads, his AI translated it as Wuzhen, with other arrows pointing to Tongxian, Jiaxing, Huzhou, and Wujiang. “Computer, what language is this?” IT IS A DIALECT OF ANCIENT CHINESE, ADJUSTING GENE-MODS TO FOR TRANSLATION.
His vocal cords did that weird thing that happened whenever the AI needed to translate from Terran to another language or dialect. How the gene-mods did it was beyond his pay grade, but everyone always complimented him on his accent, so apparently the technology was sound.
He saw figures up ahead with a ox and wagon. His enhanced vision showed him about what he expected, peasants bringing their wares to town for sale. That was, until he saw the woman had goats eyes. The man had goats horns curling from his forehead but in all other aspects looked Human.
“Emperor above, what is going on?” He thought to himself as he decided he may not want to walk into town in green and black scout armor. He reached into dimensional storage and found a large trench coat that would fit over his armor. He pulled it out and put it on, then sent a mental command to retract his helmet as it whooshed back into the backpack portion of his armor.
As he walked up to the gates he was met with a solitary guard, this man had human features but a monkey’s tail. “Hurry up and get in, we’re about to close the gate house.” Victor pointed a thumb backwards, “There are two people behind me on a wagon coming.” The monkey guard yelled out as Victor stepped into the village past the walls.
“Hurry up you dumb turtles, instinctive are on the prowl and won’t think twice about making a meal of the lot of you!” The guard yelled. This seemed to put some fire under them, as they cracked their whip on the ox yelling for it to move. He sub-vocalized to his AI, “Does the term instinctual in reference to ancient china mean anything?”
The computer spoke back in his inner ear, CHINESE MYSTICISM STATES PRACTICERS OF INSTINCTIVE CULTIVATION BECAME ANIMAL LIKE AND OFTEN CANNIBALISTIC. Victor looked around at the village, seeing the sign for what must be an inn, he made his way across the street narrowly avoiding a steaming pile of horse manure.
The inn was bustling, barmaids with cats ears or pigs snouts served drinks and food to tables and people seemed to huddle close to the strange hearth like fireplace of the inn. It wasn’t like any fireplace he had ever seen. He sub-vocalized the question to his AI and it responded with the word “KANG”.
He found a chair near the front of the inn, far away from the kang and watched the locals. It appeared that coinage was copper discs. He turned his head from the inn and ducked down to bring his helmet back up, “Computer, replicate those discs in the nano-forge from copper ingots, have them ready for me to pull out of dimensional storage, we’ll need currency.”
His helmet slid back into his backpack and he raised his head and turned around just as a barmaid noticed he had no food or drink. “We have veil or pork, beer or wine. What can I get you?” Victor kept his face neutral, something that would have been impossible before his training with the Guard, she looked Xeno after all, the snout was all that was out of place on an otherwise attractive woman.
“I’ll have the veil and wine. Also, who do I see about a room?” He asked.
The boar-kin woman turned her head towards the bar, “Old man Huang would be the one to check with, don’t know if we have any open tonight. We have a lot of refugees from Huzhou after all.”
Victor raised an eyebrow, usually refugees meant something bad, “Refugees you say? I’m new to these parts, what happened?”
The barmaid snorted, which was ironic considering she was a boar-kin. “You must be new, Huzhou was raised to the ground by the instinctives, the Empress has sent a small contingency of the sect of the Iron Paw to defend Wuzhen, as we are a central transport hub.” The barmaid then looked over to a table of women in much more elaborate dress than the commoners, each with a jade talisman on their wrist.
Without another word she brought more drinks to their table, on it stacked plate after plate, bowl after bowl of food. After setting down the drinks she bowed until her snout almost touched the table before hastily retreating from their prescence.
Victor’s AI chimed in his ear that fabrication was complete and he reached under the table to access his dimensional storage, grabbing two handfuls of copper coins he put them in his trench coat pockets. He noted that although the inn was crowded, everyone else avoided the table with the sect women. It was almost as if others had moved their tables and chairs away, as if there were danger near them. The women didn’t look especially tough, they were armed with swords, but mostly dressed in robes of fine silk, no armor to be found.
He also noted they all had traits of tiger in them. Some had tails, some had the ears, some had the eyes. He supposed that was why they were called the Iron Paw sect, not very creative, but he doubted he could do better.
The barmaid came back with a plate of veil, steamed vegetables, and a large cup of wine. As she sat it down she said quietly, “Stop staring at the cultivators, do not draw their notice or they will decide they need make an example of an upstart mortal.”
Victor kept his face stoney as he accepted the meal and looked elsewhere while he ate. The food was quite good although he didn’t like the turnips. The wine was made from rice, and quite strong. He was about to wave the barmaid back over when a bell started ringing. Everyone in the inn froze, well all but the cultivators.
They pushed their plates to the center of the table, stood as one, and marched out of the inn. As they reached the door conversations started up. With Victor’s enhanced hearing he heard variations of ‘They must have spotted instinctuals’, or ‘I hope the iron paw is as fierce as they are rumored to be.’
Victor stood up, asked the barmaid for the tab, placed some copper on the table and raised his collar as he walked out of the inn. He noticed none of the other patrons followed him out, if anything they huddled away from the door. Seeing no-one was around he jumped using the armors powerful servo motors to propel him onto the roof of a two-story store. He almost didn’t clear the roof, landing with a slight thud and breaking roofing tiles as he made his way to the peek of the roof.
He watched as the women of the sect bounced almost weightlessly off of the rooftops reaching the guard tower at the east gate. Bringing his helmet back up his hud instantly targeted over 30 creatures rushing the east gate at monstrous speed. 160 KM/HR, ETA 45 SECONDS his AI helpfully informed him.The creatures were vaguely humanoid, they resembled ware-wolves, and ran on all fours. He watched as the cultivators drew their weapons as one, the human guards dropped from the wall and grabbed long pike-like weapons.
WAR MODE ENGAGED, EVASIVE ACTION REQUIRED fired through his ears as his armor spun from a crouching position and narrowly avoided a sword that stabbed through the ceramic tile of the roof to nearly the hilt. Before him stood a woman with the ears of a tiger in a blue silk dress.
His AI relinquished emergency control of the armor back to Victor as she spoke. “You are fast for a male. Surrender to this Mei, and I will make sure your execution is quick.” Victor cocked his head to the side before partially raising a hand. The bolter pistol appeared in his hand from dimensional storage as he pulled the trigger.
Mei’s eyes were round as the roof beneath her feet vanished in a hail of ceramic and wood, a noise as if a volcano had exploded right next to her severely stunned her more sensitive cultivator ears as she fell through to the second floor. Victor turned to the east wall in time to see a mass of bodies, all female it appeared, as he had never seen ware-wolves with breasts, leap the ten meters or so to the top of the wall. Howls pierced the night air as some were impaled on swords, others lashed out with razor sharp claws tearing into members of the Iron Paw sect.
It was obvious they would not hold that position. If they didn’t retreat they would all be lost, some of the smarter or luckier of the sect began to tactically retreat, fending off claws and teeth with their swords. Victor turned and saw the highest structure in town, a bell tower that stood about five stories high. That must have been where the warning came from, he could get a better vantage point from there.
Suddenly he heard a growl and the woman he had unceremoniously dropped through the roof jumped through the opening and landed as if gravity held no sway over her. “You have made a grave mistake instinctual, for this Mei will end you this…”
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She didn’t get to finish her sentence as she watched the black armored figure with a strange brown robe suddenly launch himself on wings of fire from the roof to the top of the bell tower.
“Mei, Mei! Where are you, we are being overrun!” She heard from the east wall as her sect sisters were back pedaling as the mass of instinctuals climbed over both their own dead and her sisters. She turned away from the strange male and leaped from rooftop to rooftop to aid her sisters in battle.
She landed next to Xiang, who now had a gash across her cheek from combat, “There is someone else here, a male!” She shouted as she drove her sword into one of the wolf-kin that came too close. It howled in pain and retreated, but she knew it was not a fatal blow.
Xiang parried a high swipe of a claw and with a spin kick sent the instinctual she was fighting flying backwards only for it to catch itself with its claws and grind to a crouching halt. “Who? We are in the backlands of the Empire, and why would they send a male, he would surely be courting death against foes such as these!”
Mei blocked a razor sharp claw with the blunt edge of her sword before parrying backwards, “It doesn’t matter, our orders are to protect this town at all costs, don’t let them push us into a blind ally or somewhere we can’t defend ourselves.”
___________________
Victor watched as the tiger ladies tried desperately to fend off the ware-wolf ladies. It was not going well for the tigers, it seemed that although the instinctuals didn’t use weapons, they were faster, bigger, stronger, and meaner on average. His hud counted six cultivators down, two of which were being eaten by the ware-wolf women, the remaining five were being pushed towards center square.
What they couldn’t see was a group of four cultivators coming up on their flank from the south. It seems that even though these sect ladies seem haughty at best, they are the closest thing to the good guys in this fight. Victor cursed as he reached into his dimensional storage, a mark 8 flamer wrapped itself lovingly around his scout armor, as his hands wrapped around the handle and nozzle.
He leaped from the bell tower, shattering roofing tiles and bricks as he dropped the five stories to the ground before firing the retro-rockets in his boots, hitting the ground behind the Iron Paw sect before pouring withering fire from the flamer into the four instinctualists rushing from the south. They howled in agony as napalm lapped at their fur and burned them as they wallowed on the dirt road of the town square trying to quench the fire.
Victor turned around as the women of the Iron Paw were forced back to his position, which worked out fine, now they weren’t in the way. He poured burning liquid napalm into the ranks of the instinctuals. Those that could turned on claws and ran, those that didn’t burned in the street.
He turned around and ordered his helmet to retract, the four standing sisters of the Iron Paw leaped a step back bringing up their battered swords. He allowed his flamer to dissolve back into this dimensional storage. “Stand down ladies, the threat is over.” If anything this made them bring their swords up more.
Mei was the first to find her voice, “You are obviously a master of fire to dispatch so many of the betrayers instinctuals. Who sent you?”
Victor’s face remained impassive, this was new information, the instinctuals betrayed the Empire in some way. “No one sent me, I was in the area, and you apparently needed aid.” Let them decide with that what they will.
Mei slowly lowered her sword, before starting to laugh without much mirth, “In our darkest hour a hidden master appears and saves us from death. You would think we were part of a play or poets story.” The other women lowered what was left of their weapons as well.
Xiang looked Victor up and down, “I have never heard of male becoming a cultivator of war, that is usually the domain of females. I have also never seen clothing or armor like you wear, are you from the Empire?”
Victor sighed, well, here goes. “I am not from the Empire, I am from a far away land called Terra, and at the moment, I am merely passing through.”
The smaller one known as Li spoke up, “One does not simply pass through the Celestial Empire! The wall has stood for millennia untold, only the Immortal Empress remembers when it was built. How did you cross it?”
Victor only shrugged, “Who said I crossed the wall?” As he turned around and walked to the inn he only recently left. The crowd of people parted as he walked in.
_____________________
Xiang turned to Mei, “He is a foreigner wandering our land, Shihan must be informed of his presence and bring it before the court.”
Mei nodded her head turning to the final woman left standing, “Hua, travel to Wujiang, let our sisters know what has transpired here and have a message sent back to the Imperial Palace about this newcomer and what we should do.”
Li spoke, “Should we not attempt to capture him ourselves? After all, a male cultivator is a rarity indeed.”
Mei looked over to the smaller Li, “He burned down instinctuals with what appeared to be the forgotten Concept of Fire, for that was the Sixth Level Yang Fire, something we females who cultivate yin are incapable of. No, we would court death trying to capture a hidden master of his power. Did any of you even feel his Chi?” They all shook their heads.
Mei continued, “Then he is hiding his true power from us. When I first saw him leap from the ground to the rooftop I thought him a spy for the instinctuals. When I tried to attack he moved with a speed even I could not match. When I threatened him he simply ignored me, and throughout that I never once felt his Chi. This is a male we must be careful around sisters, now go Hua.”
_____________________
Victor watched as the people in the inn parted before him. He noticed many of them bowing as though he were part of the Imperial family of Terra. He reached the bar where the innkeeper, what was his name again? HUANG his AI chimed in.
“Huang, I require lodgings for the night. Do you have a room available?”
The Ox-Kin bowed so low as to touch the bar, “This lowly one will gladly provide you with a room hidden master.” He raised his head and waved the boar-kin barmaid over to him in a frenzy, “Chun, find the hidden master a room.”
Chun rushed over and bowed before Victor, “Please follow me hidden master?”
“Victor, my name is Victor Cane. Please, lead the way Chun.”
As he followed Chun upstairs to an empty room Victor closed and locked the door, if they want to think he is a hidden master then let them. In the meantime he needed sleep. He reached one more time into his dimensional storage and pulled four small security drones and paired them to his armor’s AI.
One flew out the open window to watch from outside, one crawled under the door to watch the inn, the other two sat inside the room.
Once he felt all was secured he settled into the not so great bed and closed his helmet. He’d worry about everything else tomorrow.

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Intro

To preface this review, I just need to say that this is going to be a very, long read. Going through it myself just for the fun of it takes around 30 minutes — it's almost 7k words of text, including lyrical references. So for the best experience, listen to the album beforehand to understand what the hell I was thinking when I wrote this review, play the album while reading, and set a good amount of time aside.
And yes, this is 9 months late 😭 I'm not sorry — when I find an album review online it's always around a paragraph per song or even shorter. It makes sense from a journalistic perspective, but I want to do this album justice, hence taking 7 months to write out all my thoughts.
This shit is comprehensive and definitely overanalyzed, especially in Talk that Talk and Trouble. Each song review will compose of my commentary going over the song, noting the details I noticed through months of listening, then a conclusion. Also, mild swearing warning, I like implementing a touch of "French" when I'm very emotional about something. Anyway, onto the review!
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Between 1&2 💞

Album Review
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TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT
TELL ME WHAT YOU NEED
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Talk that Talk 🎙

Lead producer: collapsedone
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One of the most perfect TWICE songs.
I think this is one of TWICE’s best-sounding title tracks. Warm modulated synths, a thrumming bass line, distant bells, shimmering synths — the purpose of this song is to be fun and my god is it excellent at it, like… Sana and Chaeyoung are saying knock-knock-knock and beep-beep-beep as if they’re some kind of car. So much fun.
Further along in the verse, Dahyun’s voice sounds so full and smooth with that layered harmony. Tzuyu coming with the Yes or Yes, Push & Pull, and 1 to 10 references — these are 5 years of song references. And Jeongyeon closes the pre-chorus accompanied by a rising synth to drop into chorus one. Jeongyeon slays pre-choruses.
The drums accelerate, the synths start blasting, and Jihyo opens to that party of a chorus with her godly vocals,
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Tell me what you want
Tell me what you need
A to Z da malhaebwa
But shijageun ireoke have
Talk that talk ttak han madi
Talk that talk L-O-V-E
deullyeojweo ooh
Now now now now now yeah~

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During Sana's Talk that Talk~ lines there’s this gentle ascending synth bell that rings with the descending melody and it sounds absolutely gorgeous. And the choreography during that part of the chorus is so so so so fun: the talking hands bit, spelling L-O-V-E, concluding with the deullyeojweo ooh! Oh my Jihyo the deullyeojweo ooh…
Have I mentioned this song is fun?
Speeding through verse 2; Chaeyoung’s part with the cat ears popping in the music video is adorable; Momo her stretching her arms out looks so damn cool; and Dahyun with her replay part sounds so lovely — although I think it sonically sounds a touch random, it makes sense thematically.
And now for this pre-chorus. Mina and Jihyo leading into it sound great BUT JEONGYEON… Now, she is my ult bias, and this pre-chorus sounds almost identical to the first one, but the way she holds that final note, enunciating and holding that now~ for one more beat before the chorus drops sounds so perfect — the song teeters on a cliff edge. Jeongyeon slays pre-choruses.
Dropping into the second chorus and man, Jihyo powered through that first chorus, but the way Nayeon delivers it just hits different. She has this indescribable “pop” voice (I promise this wasn't on purpose) that stands out and shouts this is THE chorus. I think this is especially apparent in how both lead their choruses where Jihyo starts at 120% power while Nayeon waits until [Tell me] WHAT YOU WANT to full-send it. She also highlights “malhaebwa” in a similar way later in the chorus.
Another deullyeojweo ooh! Nayeon travels to Narnia, and Mina the engineer strikes again in this heavenly, underwater-esque bridge,
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The simple words “I love you”
That’s all I wanna hear
Without hesitation, I’ll go up to you
I’ll make it simple
And just tell you I love you

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The word “love” is said for the first time in the song. There’s a funky keyboard instrument behind Chaeyoung’s part. Jihyo, Chaeyoung, and Nayeon take the initiative in their lyrics, professing their love before closing the bridge.
And now for the pièce-de-résistance: this final double chorus is exceptional — 40 seconds of crack-laced euphoria; Jihyo switches up the chorus and the choreo, Dahyun chimes in with her fluttery “Talk that Talk”, Momo comes out of nowhere with “oh yeah it sounds so good!” — you’re damn right it does, and this is where the song SOARS.
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han beon deo~ haejweo
geurae banggeum geu mal~

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Nayeon outright shouts “Tell me what you need” and then Jeongyeon sings the above lines in such an ethereal, warm way where the first line ascends while the second line descends, causing a lull in the song before the finale with Nayeon, finishing off the song with the final deullyeojweo ooh! What a party. What a song.
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THE GOOD

• The synths of all time
• The chimes during Talk-that-talk~
• Jeongyeon’s pre-chorus going into Nayeon’s chorus
• The entirety of that magical, final chorus and outro

Needs Work

• The opening hook (Tell me what you want) and accompanying choreography could be “catchier”

Core Memory

• Singing (and dancing) my heart out when this song played at a K-pop club

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Lyrics and theme-wise, if this were to have been TWICE’s last comeback, they’ve once again built upon the theme they've been doing since debut: a Bildungsroman, a coming-of-age story.
This song’s chorus is honest yet simple; it asks the listener, in this case, the other half of the relationship, to be more upfront and open with their love (never be scared of love), that before the relationship can continue and flourish there has to be a foundation and commitment of love between each other.
TWICE debuted with a song about making your crush go ooh ahh. Years later, they started pondering “What is love?” and imagining their crush responding with “yes” when asking them out — and now concluding with the phrase “Talk that talk, [talk that] L-O-V-E”, being upfront with the relationship, wishing their partner to also be happy, to commit to them, to feel the love that they want to impart on them. From gawking like ooh-ahh to talking out your shared love like adults — to having a true relationship between (one and) two.
And can I just say before finishing off Talk that Talk's review that this is such a fun and repeatable song with many little intricacies hidden in the nonet’s vocals and the production. This is the third draft I’m writing about Talk that Talk and its original word count pretty much quadrupled.
Harkening back to TWICE’s roots by combining mature thinking with youthful character, an incredible ending to look forward to, and just simply being a club-banger that’s easy to listen to, TTT is an easy 10/10.
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WATCH ME GO WATCH ME GO
RULE THE WORLD
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Queen of Hearts 👑

Lead producer: LDN Noise of SM
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If there was one B-side to promote in a live clip, this was a solid choice.
Helmed by LDN Noise going headlong into the Western boy-group rock-band aesthetic, Queen of Hearts is a boom-boom-clap song through and through. The drums are very prominent throughout the song, only giving room to riffs of electric guitar in the chorus to drive and continue the momentum of the music.
And speaking of the chorus, vocal line each got a chorus to flex and they did not fuck around,
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You ain’t ready for it
Watch me go~ watch me go~
Rule the world
Know you never doubted baby
I’mma go run the whole universe~

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Cymbals crashing, drums booming, and 3MIX belting all just so sound so good.
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Baby I was born to rule~~
Yeah I’m the queen, I’m the queen
And it’s all because of you~~
That I’m the Queen of Hearts

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These long, held-out notes performed by Jihyo and Nayeon are simply exquisite. Along with the shredding guitar, the drum set coming in full, and the interludes by Dahyun, Momo, and Chaeyoung, this is the part of the song that always, always, gives me goosebumps — it sounds so visceral, so energetic, so fun, so triumphant. Boom-boom-clap songs can be hit or miss with people, but there's no denying the payoff from the first part of the chorus to the second part is worth the wait.
The theme of the song so far has been kind of spread around the song. The chorus alludes to it with the line "And it’s all because of you." But Mina shows more sides of it in the second verse, especially with the phrase,
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And now that I’m surrounded by all my girls
We be shining bright like diamonds and pearls

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It sounds really lovely — in a very cheesy and affectionate kind of way, as it rightfully should — the song is about the girls and their fans. But the bridge is where the song indeed shows its colours
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Screaming out my name
See it in the stage lights
Feel so lucky just to have ya
Cause I know deep down I was meant for something bigger! Greater!
I know you’re seeing what I see
Yeah I’ll be everything you need
I know I’m gonna walk the walk
And talk the talk to be~ [the Queen of Hearts]

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This is a song CONCEIVED TO BE PERFORMED FOR THE FANS. It’s meant to be loud. It’s meant to be unapologetic. It’s meant to be sappy. And it’s all the more wonderful for it.
This is the TWICEiest shit ever.
Like Talk that Talk, Queen of Hearts also has a killer closer. The production already started to grow from the bridge, but now the guitarist finally went Super Saiyan and instead of supporting the drums, they both take the centrepiece in tandem.
Then finally, the closing moments of the song even manage to squeeze in some more sappiness.
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So thank you for the memories
You’re all the ones who made me~
So thank you for the memories
That I’m the Queen of Hearts

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I still can’t believe that this banger is a FAN SONG out of all things. Truly, the TWICEiest shit ever.
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THE GOOD

• Adorable fucking lyrics
• Unrelenting, roaring chorus
• English and vocal flex
• Addicting guitar riffs

Needs Work

• Chaeyoung rapping in English in their Korean songs somehow slaps harder than her English rapping in their English songs, nonetheless, in QoH, it fits with the sound of the song

Life Highlight

• Walking home from a K-pop festival with this song playing, felt like a Queen of Hearts

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I love these types of rock songs with how grunge and head-bang-able they are, there is just a certain nostalgic and cheesy quality to them that feels so cozy. I don’t love putting them on repeat, because in this case, I do believe there is such a thing as too much of a good thing. Perhaps more shredding, maybe a guitar solo to rock out to, or an accompaniment(!) of ad-libs from 3MIX to support Jihyo’s final chorus? A ONCE can dream of a truly bombastic rock song from TWICE. But then again that distracts from the core of what this song is: a fan song disguised as a rock song.
Queen of Hearts has so much sweetness in its lyrics and message that it's overflowing. The drums, guitar, and vocals can be as loud and intricate as they can, but the theme of this song is what makes it special from TWICE’s other rock songs — it’s a 9/10 for me.
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I WANNA WANNA WANNA
TAKE YOU TO THE BASICS
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Basics 🌈

Sole lyricist credit: Chaeyoung
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Quite possibly the jammiest (pun intended) song of the album.
A song written by the Strawberry Princess herself — an event similar in frequency to other artists' releases with her last song being 2020’s silky Handle It — Basics first starts with an understated and dreamy delivery. After the first stanza, however, a bouncy Miami bass line emerges, revealing the true nature of the song: this is a classic summer bop! Especially in the first rap,
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dareun aedeulgwaneun dalla
Ain’t beggin’ for love
nappeun geon anijana ige naraseo
eodiro twilji molla
Like rainbow bubble gum
geureoni nal kkwak butjabadweo

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Syllables are pronounced in a relaxed nature, bars often starting with an "ah" sound, flirty lines in English — this rap features a production full of pop with R&B flourishes and, in my opinion, this is Chaeyoung’s bag. Also, the line "rainbow bubblegum" is so adorable and so Chaeyoung.
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I wanna wanna wanna take it to the basics
da weonhae weonhae weonhae? seodureuji ma Baby
ppeonhae ppeonhae malhae mweohae da al tende
Ah yeah ah yeah ah yeah ah yeah

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That chorus is pure pop with a Miami bass backing; you better be bopping your head to the melody, if not booty poppin' to the bassline. Chaeyoung loves rhyming in the first half of the chorus to enhance its catchiness and it's damn incredible: the “wanna”, “weonhae”, and “ppeonhae” all create these imperfect rhymes that continue momentum without feeling repetitive.
After the very Boy With Luv-sounding “ah yeah ah yeah, ah yeah ah yeah” comes an 8-bar split half and half between Chaeyoung and Momo. Coming from the chorus, the production completely cuts out for the first 2 bars. This adds tension; the song yearns to have that bass beat thumping again and all we have in the audio space in those 2 bars is Chaeyoung spittin' and she delivered.
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taneun deut tteugeoun samak wie
yeppeuge pieonan jangmi gata
joshimseure naege dagaol ttae
nado moreuge jjilleobeoril tende

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Translating to:
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Above the hot, burning desert
It’s like a rose that bloomed beautifully
When you come to me slowly
I will prick you unconsciously

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The rap feels slick, effortless, and confident. Her diction remains sharp when enunciating each syllable but she doesn’t let the flow of her rap waver or build as her 4 bars go by, it’s just smooth consistency throughout. Even the lyrics possess an aura of laid-back collectedness that is just so her. The things Chaeyoung can do when given her pen.
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THE GOOD

• That sweet summer vibe of a chorus
• The “spaceship” post-chorus is killer
• Chaeyoung devoured this song
• Sure-footed, confident lyrics

Needs Work

• Perhaps an alteration of that ah yeah ah yeah line
• The way Jihyo did her pre-chorus line is good, but Mina’s is great

Core Memory

• After donating my hair, walking down the rainbow-coloured areas of downtown Toronto with this song playing was very… fitting

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This song is summer bliss distilled into 2:56. It’s dreamy, the raps are satisfying, and the ending is charming. I will say that although the second half of the song adds the stunning “spaceship” post-choruses and a floaty bridge with an incredible drumbeat drop into the final chorus, the raps of the song make it feel a bit front-loaded. And in an album stacked with awesome finishers, it feels more apparent.
With that said, it’s an 8/10 bop for me. This song is so easy to put on and it feels exactly what Chaeyoung would make if given the reins to produce a pop song all on her own. The lyrics are nonchalant but full of conviction, the wordplay is intricate, and the production playful but not too bombastic — it's just a nice vibe. Songs like Basics are the standard for good, simple, repeatable pop music and I’m happy that Chaeyoung got to test her pen in this genre.
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BABY WE’RE IN
TROUBLE TROUBLE
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Trouble 💃

Sole lyricist credit: Jihyo
Background vocals: Jihyo
Lead composer credit: Jihyo
Vocal director credit: Jihyo (an assumption given her contributions in First Time)
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One of the most enjoyable songs I’ve heard in a while.
There is an underlying tension within the first 4 bars of the song, Jihyo and Nayeon confidently open it to a nondescript array of synths and then the stanza ends, Momo announces “Let’s go”, the beat drops and it hits you: this is a club song.
Dahyun's relaxed delivery contrasted with Jeongyeon's staccato flow, the wobbly synth beat with sprinkle of house piano, Sana dramatically slowing down the song only for Tzuyu to build it back up until the chorus drops,
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• Nayeon opens it using a breathy tone, with vocal chops serving as harmonies
• The blooming of the house piano takes centre stage and the song ascends into euphoria
• A random drum roll capped off by a cymbal crash
• Jeongyeon’s pronunciation of the word “trouble” almost being a growl
• Chaeyoung slyly admitting “I like this trouble”
• The entirety of Tzuyu’s tro~oh~oh~ouble yeah~
• Sana using her deep voice for the na~na~na~na
• Jihyo leading the vocals during the synchronized T W I C E chant

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This chorus is perfect. Toronto’s residential market needs this song injected into its veins because god damn this song has SO much house in it. And then, ANOTHER KILLING PART: this rap fucking slaps.
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gamchweo bwatja geugeon Fake
ppajin hamjeongeun Sweet cake

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During the first 2 bars, Chaeyoung is keeping it calm because that trip of a chorus just ended and the song needs a breather, but I don't think anyone expected her to SNAP this hard afterwards:
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You cannot resist this
Cannot miss this, such a bliss
Ima put it down down
Oh yeah, better kiss kiss

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Below is the structure of her this portion of the rap, I’m not that well versed in this technical aspect of music theory but I digress, this is all in the span of around 5 seconds where it’s:
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Triplet-triplet
Quadruplet-triplet
Quadruplet-doublet
Doublet-quadruplet

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Now, 25/5 = 5 syllables per second isn’t groundbreaking, but goddamn it these 2 bars sound so nice — if there is one part in this album that I always repeat, it’s this. The addition of that first quadruplet for “cannot miss this” in the midst of the triplets sticks out and accelerates the flow of the rap while the following doublets and quadruplets destabilize and slow the rap down as the verse closes. And can I just point out:
THE MAIN VOCALIST WROTE, DIRECTED, AND COMPOSED THIS SONG ‼
Chaeyoung of course delivered the fuck out of her verse but THIS is what you get when you have a member not only write the words they’re saying but also the melody and flow with which they sing it, when that member knows the others so well that when they write a song they know how to make the group exceed. This is what you get when the artists you stan love doing artist shit.
And. AND. That's not all — with how much I mentioned I love a good outro to close a song, this outro slaps as well:
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Woo wee woo wee woo
I like this trouble be-be
Woo wee woo wee woo
I like this trouble bay-be
Woo wee woo wee woo
I like this trouble bay-beh
Woo wee woo wee woo
I like this trou-ble

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Like, come on, Nayeon’s imitating a police siren for crying out loud. And this is all after her ad-libs in the final post-chorus; after the pianist going full tilt and playing that piano as if it was their last chance to ever play; after that final T W I C E chant by all the members come these blissful 20 seconds at the very end. What a song.
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THE GOOD

• The theme of relishing in an uncontrolled love
• Sana and Mina’s melody in the pre-chorus
• Chorus
• Rap
• Outro
• Wees and woos

Needs Work

• Mina’s line of “falling down, falling down, falling down low” in verse 2 feels a bit too abrupt of a change

Core Memory

• While writing Trouble's review I had this song on repeat for my whole subway commute and I must've been so distracting, just head-bopping and being so invested in enjoying a song

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Need I say more, easy 9/10. The only reason I place Talk that Talk above Trouble is because of what that song represents but besides that, this is one of the best “international” sounds they’ve put out. Actually, I haven’t listened to Eyes wide open in a while but this song is up there with one of the most sonically pleasing pieces of work they’ve done.
Clubbing TWICE has always been a thing since TT was birthed in 2016, and has been a staple of their discography since 2019’s Fancy You and Feel Special mini albums, but Trouble unapologetically dives into and fits the house genre so well you’d think that this is TWICE’s bread and butter sound.
Trouble is Jihyo’s magnum opus. What a song.
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BRAVE BRAVE BRAVE
FOR YOU
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Brave 💖

Main producer: Slow Rabbit of HYBE
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I first thought this was just a good song, then I read the lyrics.
Gentle guitar plucks, shimmering synths, a distant keyboard in the right ear, in the left a glockenspiel, the melodic oohs from the members — this song is PRETTY.
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The night that was unusually dark
Above this terrifying world, felt so lonely
The world has grown in the time of wandering
So hard to breathe

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Mina and Chaeyoung open the song with how they feel lonely and that it's hard to breathe and now suddenly the song feels bittersweet — I was not expecting the song to be this emotional. Brave describes a situation where the singer is in a darker place in life and it isn't until another person gives them hope by calling them 'brave' that they find the drive to keep going.
Once the chorus hits, the melodies pick up, more guitars get added — there’s even an electric guitar hidden in the mix somewhere, and the song drops the emotional front to reveal a mid-tempo pop song to dance to while crying in the club. The song as a whole still carries this melancholy feeling, but now with the added support of this chorus acting as a light amongst the gloom.
Continuing on in the second verse there's this gorgeous, well-placed break in the song that just lets it settle after that chorus. Only a seasoned producer would risk this much empty space in a song and Slow Rabbit went to fill those shoes.
Back to the chorus, I'll take this moment to once again commend Slow Rabbit with the mixing of the song, because 4MIX undoubtedly sounds good in the chorus, and the interludes from Dahyun, Chaeyoung, and Mina also sound really good, but the clear highlight of the choruses are these lines:
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Oh na na na neon nal naige hae [Momo, then Tzuyu, then Momo]
On and on and on
Brave brave brave for ya [Dahyun, then Chaeyoung, then Mina]
Oh na na na neon nal sum shwige hae [Sana, then Momo, then Sana]
On and on and on oh trust me babe

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Momo, Sana, and Tzuyu form this beautiful, surprisingly catchy, second half of the chorus accompanied by a guitar drop. It should not turn out this well with how conflicting the "na"s are with the guitar melody but it creates this gentle bopping ebb and flow that feels so lush and mellow.
Diving into the bridge reveals that the listener of the song is revealed not only capable of supporting the singer through direct words but also through their thoughts and dreams. As can be discerned, this can be a song interpreted to be about ONCEs, about how they push TWICE to be their best selves despite the breathless hardships they face. It's a very sweet and touching song.
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THE GOOD

• Special lyrics
• Pleasant sound to vibe out to
• That gentle break after the first chorus
• Jihyo’s high note at the end
• A Nayeon Jeongyeon joint high note ⁉️
• Just pretty vocals throughout

Needs Work

• Potentially hard to comprehend without translating the Korean lyrics

Core Memory

• Form of Therapy’s life motto revolves around the word “brave”. I don’t know where I got that from, but I remembered it right before watching his album reaction

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I’m actually spoiled with the TWICE members’ easy-to-understand songwriting that when a song like this pops up where it's not written by a member and the thematic bits are mostly in Korean, I tend to put it aside in favour of the other songs on the album. And, especially for a song focusing on a theme like this where the English phrases don’t do the Korean lyrics enough justice, it does place a bit of a barrier on the listening experience, dropping it down to a 7/10 from an 8/10.
With that anecdote out of the way, this song is just such a vibe, man. I know that sounds super hippy to say but Brave is so mellow and smooth that I can’t help but sway a little when that chorus hits. And then I remember what the lyrics say and I tear up a bit on the inside. This song is so pure, raw, and full of heart — we need more songs like these where they just reminisce about life while putting up an upbeat front. Don't mind me just crying while dancing the night away.
With that said, this isn't the first time this theme has been sung by TWICE either, they've long trodden this path of supportive, confiding, up-lifting songs with Young & Wild, Rainbow, Queen, Go Hard, Depend on You, even this album's Queen of Hearts, and, of course, Feel Special. Brave just adds another on top of an already stacked lineup, unique with its mellow somberness.
Also now feels like a good time to get into my rating system:

• 7/10s are songs are ones that are simply good throughout or great songs with apparent flaws
• 8/10s are great songs with standout characteristics
• 9/10s are borderline perfect songs where I sometimes can't comprehend how great they are
• And 10/10s are the best of an artist's discography, songs that encapsulate their ethos perfectly or expand upon them in a meaningful way

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I SEE THE LIES
ON THE TIP OF YOUR TONGUE
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Gone 💨

Sole lyricist credit: Dahyun
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Who the fuck pissed off Dubu this time??
It’s getting quite rare to see TWICE pull off brand new sounds because, with now 190 original songs under their belt, they’ve done so many genres and sub-genres varying from hyper pop, to bossa nova, to whatever 2020’s Go Hard is. So it’s surprising to see they’ve still got tricks up their sleeves and Gone is one of them.
The song starts with strings swinging back and forth and vocal chops dancing from ear to ear, teasing what’s yet to come. Jihyo enters the song with a whisper and the song sets its pace. A stagnant drum pad moves the song along and typical song progression would have Mina continue the build but — it doesn’t. The song simmers, adding a hint of high hat to the pot. And then, Sana and Tzuyu come on and surely the buildup must boil over right?
Silence, until…
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I see the LIES on the top of your tongue

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The strings emerge again on full blast, the simmer rolls to a boil, and the anger of the song is revealed,
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All the fate I had towards you
Fades like a fog, gone, gone
Your flipping mind of doing this and that
I’m tired of it, it’s meaningless
In the beginning, it was hard to believe
With that, hatred increases

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The singer is so scorned and burned from this relationship that they reminisce about all the effort they’ve put in since the beginning, but their “partner” is so unconcerned that they’ve just about had enough of the relationship altogether.
This has been Dahyun’s thing since 2020’s Bring It Back, 2021’s Cruel, 2022’s That’s all I’m saying, and even 2023's Don't Blame It On Me — emotionally charged breakup songs that make you feel as if she’s gone through a dozen bad relationships. Dispatch, do your job better, or don't.
Another highlight of the song is the post-chorus going into the bridge. This segment reiterates the structure from the first post-chorus — a barrage of drums supported by the rhythmic strumming of a bass guitar along with a consistent synth filling out the soundscape. But this time, it’s Dahyun and Chaeyoung on the rap:
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I can’t stand it anymore [Dahyun]
My patience, invisible
I can’t find it, it’s all gone
Even if I try to turn back, it’s too late [Chaeyoung]
There’s no use anymore
It has left, it’s long gone
You, with flipping mind, you are out [Momo]
I know that you know what I’m talking about [Dahyun]
Nothing you could say that could turn this around
I’m gone

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Continuing the disrespected theme of the song, Dahyun notes that she’s finally had enough with Chaeyoung adding that there’s no point salvaging what was once there for all of it is long gone. Momo and Dahyun round it off by telling the listener that there’s no point trying to reason with them or playing naive, they fucked up and there’s no coming back.
Can I just say, it's a bit of a shame that Chaeyoung’s rapping popped off in this album while Dahyun only has this one verse that she shares with Chaeyoung, but it just sounds so good how Dahyun eases in after the chorus with her light rapping tone transitioning into her singing. She even holds the “gone” in a little crescendo for some added pizzazz.
And, there’s no way I’m not going to talk about Momo’s vocals in this bridge. Damned if she only got 1 line to use it in, her lower register is incredible. She sounds so smooth singing in this tone. All of TWICE do in particular and there is nary a weak vocal performance in this album.
To close the song off, a wash of synths gets to have their shine in the spotlight, showered with Nayeon’s belting, signifying the dramatic and drawn-out conclusion of this partnership.
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THE GOOD

• They’ve still got their surprises
• Thundering chorus
• 2nd rap and bridge combo
• A bitter, crumbling relationship theme

Needs Work

• I’m not a huge fan of the mixing during the first post-chorus, where Momo's vocals were fighting with the production, which is disappointing because Momo is capable of an insane flow
• The post-chorus in general, specifically the first one, can be a bit tiring on repeat listens

Core Memory

• Actually, I think this song sounds like a mix between GOT7's Not By The Moon, BLACKPINK’s Love To Hate Me, and Dahyun’s Bring It Back. I don’t know where I got this thought came from, but it stuck

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Going back to that point about the first post-chorus as a whole; songs that have the production continue unchanged into the post-chorus/2nd verse are very hit or miss for me — see TWICE's Don't Call Me Again for an overbearing example. The post-chorus going into the bridge contrasts Dahyun’s light tone nicely with the hard-hitting production, continuing the energy until it slowly fades into silence at the end of the bridge.
Back to the song as a whole, as much as TWICE has been experimenting with their sound for the past 4 years now, I’m happy they’re still finding new ways to explore what they’re capable of. And for that alone, even though I’m not a big fan of songs like these where they rely on sounding “big”, Dahyun’s lyricism and the thrill I receive every time I indulge myself in this song when I listen to it for the first time in a while elevates it to an 8/10. Keep on breaking hearts, Dubu.
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INVINCIBLE
SUPERHEROES
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When We Were Kids 🧸

Sole lyricist credit: Dahyun
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Press play to reminisce, pull up lyrics to cry.
This song is so beautiful. I’m totally not writing this song review, crying on the bus reminiscing about my childhood, while just having turned 21. I don’t know if these are happy or sad tears but this song is so beautiful either way.
Warm synths, muted piano, a gentle high hat, the younger members starting off the song — this has to be up there for one of the softest TWICE songs ever. And as it should, it’s one of the TWICEiest songs ever. And then Nayeon comes in,
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Invincible superheroes, we wanted to be adults
To the higher, clearer world

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The chords start swelling, the high hat keeps pace, and the harmonies come in,
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Remember when we were kids
When we were kids, we didn’t know
If we could go back
I will love it even more
Remember when we were kids

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Jihyo takes up the second half of the chorus as it drops, trading the strings for an almost R&B synth production — if choir R&B takes off, this song started it. The song relishes in this cacophony of warm sounds until returning to its sparse and peaceful verses.
This time, the hints of piano are louder, little twinkling synths begin to shimmer, the drum buildup comes and Jeongyeon drives the song straight into the chorus. No time for the strings to build like in Nayeon’s — this song loves its chorus so much.
And I'll just take this time to appreciate the amount of Jeongyeon vocals in this album. Her voice is so clean, stable, and projected — but also more tender and soft compared to the more pronounced tones of Nayeon and Jihyo.
The bridge comes in, repeating the phrase:
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I wish that I could meet
Could meet the younger me

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Giving the song time to rest, before building back up to the last chorus — this time led by Jihyo, completing the 3MIX trifecta. And interestingly enough, Chaeyoung follows up in the second half of the chorus, rather than another member of the vocal line. She really did pop off in this album.
As the last chorus begins to close, the percussion at its strongest, the harmonies on blast, the background vocals cranked up to their Sunday best, is the song going to end? Of course not! This is an album full of banger endings as if the songs don’t want to end, and When We Were Kids being the album closer very much indulges in that feeling.
After a brief refrain, accented by Nayeon’s high note with a touch of vibrato, the song almost dives back into a fourth chorus. Nayeon and Jeongyeon harmonize — a rare and heavenly moment. And the song repeats the bridge, reiterating that they want to meet their younger selves, this time with the lush chorus production before closing with silence, a few piano notes, and Tzuyu singing the last line of the song:
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Oh, we were kids

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Reflection, acceptance, hope. What a song.
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THE GOOD

• Heavenly vocals throughout
• Relatable, heartfelt lyrics
• Euphoric chorus
• Great closer to the album

Needs Work

• Refrain after the last chorus, "Back when we were kids," could’ve been executed better

Core Memory

• For an album titled Between 1&2, I don’t think anything hits harder than finishing the song reviews, with this song in particular, during your 21st birthday

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I wrote the first part of this review in November 2022. Then university, life, and other things got in the way of my headspace for me to feel confident about wrapping all of this up. In a way, I felt like I just didn’t want this review to end because of the joy that writing gives me — I didn’t want the happiness to end. And then it hit me, after watching a YouTuber rank animated movies and them placing Spirited Away at the top and explaining 'why' reminded me of just how important growing up is, and by extension this song.
This theme is important for both the rookie TWICE members in 2015 and the teenagers who would follow their journey and grow up with them, facing life’s obstacles along the way. Hardships that used to only involve family, crushes, and social media, evolve into work, commitments and all the struggles that adult life brings. Being a kid and enjoying the simple things in life is one of the most sought-after moments we want to relive because we took growing up for granted. The only thing we can do now is look back on ourselves with fondness and rose-tinted lenses.
TWICE’s original marketing was to resonate with people through their senses and their hearts. That was during their debut, and I think it still holds up today. In my opinion, touching people through their emotions is what TWICE does best and makes them one of K-pop’s all-time greats. It was never about having the best numbers — it was always about being the best idols. And to think that this journey of maturation and growth would occur from 2015 all the way to this song, being a fitting nod to TWICE’s 7th anniversary, I don’t think anyone at the company nor the group would ever imagine that they would get this far. It’s these nine women or none — 9/10.
This song honestly deserves a 10/10 with how much I noticed other people reminiscing their childhoods after I heard this song, it is such a widely-relatable message, but I am determined to limit myself to one 10/10 song per album and if I were to pick between TTT and WWWK, I'd give it to the one's that's more repeatable — Talk that Talk just has this electric energy about it.
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Epilogue

And finally here is the end. If you made it in one sitting then I commend you, because I could not write this mess in one sitting. As alluded to, I started writing this album review sometime in October, after a series of edits the first draft was finished in March, and now here's the final draft in June.
I love this album. It got me through some important parts of my life, both good and bad, and it's just a wonderful listen throughout. Reliving this album again before finally completing the review has been an exciting journey. Brave hit me harder this time, after being overshadowed by the other gems of this album, and WWWK finally got me to tear up and not just be emotionally satisfied.
I feel like there's something for everyone on this album. From the exhilarating thrills of TTT to the anthemic euphoria of QoH, the clubbing dichotomy of Trouble and Brave to the blissful glee of Basics, and the sweet reminiscence of WWWK to the thundering anger that is Gone. Like Eyes wide open, I liken Between 1&2 to a pop music taste platter — there's such an eclectic mix of pop, music in this album that there's bound to be a song that someone will love, like, and dislike.
Is this album perfect? I don't think so, but it's close — it was certainly my 2022 AOTY. Was this review biased? Absolutely. I've been a fan since 2019 and with the themes in this album, I also feel like it was biased towards me as a ONCE. And how would I rank the album in TWICE's catalogue? It's honestly at the top, at least with EPs — I also felt that way towards Feel Special but then this album was birthed so I'm excited for TWICE's future.
Ready To Be was also a stunning album and Eyes wide open frankly also deserved the spotlight that Formula of Love received so I might hit those next but no promises; this album took long enough to bake.
As for the performances, I've only seen Twitter clips (no fancams to not spoil myself) and I am SO EXCITED to finally see them in July. QoH was as glorious as expected, Brave was a delightful surprise, and WWWK, while not being the concert closer everyone expected it to be, paired up nicely with Crazy Stupid Love. And of course the bombastic addition of the dance break to TTT. But, this is not a concert review, and this is where this album review ends.
Feel free to comment with any thoughts regarding the album, other TWICE albums, and any suggestions for my writing in general. Congrats again on making it this far!
God, I love this album.

Be careful! Heavily opinionated post ahead!
My goal with this post is to bring more attention to Alc's and how it is far more superior compared to predefined sensitivities. On paper, alcs are superior due to full control of each aspect of the settings. However to create better sensitivities you need a good pattern with strong elements to support your aim. Respawns default pattern used for creating 4-3Linear or 4-4Classic is great but not the best!
Did u ever give on ALC due to consistency? I have roughly 130k kills in this game have changed my ALCs more than my kills. Even though I hardly play the anymore I still continue to be very consistent with my ALCs due the patterns I built along the way. If that is something you struggle with, this might help!
Skip to Pattern section if you wish not to read some explanations or general guidance about commonly confused ALC properties
General ALC Explanations

1. Dead-zone: YOUR AIM MUST NOT DRIFT.
   1. This can mean values between [2-6] are reasonable. Make the hipfire as stable as you can! Your deadzone must remove the drift but barely! This can improve target acquisition and save you a lot headache. (P.S. ND is overrated)
2. Outer threshold: Outer threshold defines the edge of your anolog stick values. Increasing this value brings that edge closer causing interesting effects on your sensitivity. There are 2 methods to make use of outer threshold:
   1. Extra yaw/pitch trigger: Increasing outer threshold brings the trigger for extra yaw/pitch closer. This means that the extra speed will kick in quicker, i.e, faster 180s. This can be helpful for players using kontrol freaks due to their huge range of motion. (5-10% outer threshold is good for medium/large kontrol freaks).
   2. Faster micro adjustments: When the edge comes close to the center, the response curve shirnks as well! Increasing the outer threshold is like bending a spring tighter, causing the initial stages of the curve to become steeper, akin to a twitch being amplified. This can make your sensitivity near the center of your analog feel a bit faster. This method of using outerthreshold is very experimental and can be deterimental if overdone. I found that values between [1%-5%] produce more practical uses. Getting into larger values can generate overamplified micro adjustments leading to unneccessary complications in my humble opinion.
3. Per optics: [1x = 1] [2x = 1.1] [3x = 1.28] [4x = 1.11] [6x = 1.12] [8x = 1.12] [10x = 1.13] (Removes FOV multipliers, set and forget. Shoutout to gaming merchant)
4. Ramp up time: This is a safety mechanism to allow the player to control how quickly extra speed kicks in. The faster it speeds up, the quicker you are and more difficult it is to control. 5% - 30% produce the most logical responses. As you improve you want to lower this value down but never to a point where it betrays your control.

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Pattern (The good stuff!)
What you see below can act as a documentation to a pattern and you can create such concepts to base your settings as well! This pattern will help us stay confined within our core principles and create more meaningful improvements with our sensitivity while maintaining consistency. (Please do not be scared to change sensitivities on the fly, the more sensitivities you try under a pattern the more experience you gain, grind 1 sensitivity when you think you have found the 1).
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Ratio Pattern
Keep in mind that these ALCs were created on a 100FOV.
This pattern is one of the best way to introduce consistency into your sensitivity. Making your hip-fire, ads and even the extra yaw/pitch follow 1 ratio makes your sensitivity scale proportionally, for example:

• Yaw : Pitch = ads Yaw : ads Pitch
  • Example: 180(yaw) : 110(pitch) = 120(ads Yaw) : (73: ads Pitch)
• Yaw : Pitch = extra Yaw : extra Pitch
  • Example 180(yaw) : 100(pitch) = 100(extra yaw) : 61(extra -pitch)
• You can also recognize sensitivities by ratios, for example the sensitivity above has a a ratio of 1.63. I will like to mention that keeping a lower ratio improves target acquisition while increase the ratio improves precision when ADS-ing (pick as per your playstyle). I will be dropping some of my favorite sensitivities following this pattern down below! (Don't forget to set your per optics provided above)

Add these into your ALC top-down order

• For Linear Players: (5-2-0) (180-100-100-55-0-0) (120-66-0-0-0-0)
  • No kontrolFreak, its 4-3Linear but more consistent
• For Classic Players: (3-3-5) (160-160-100-100-5-0) (160-160-0-0-0-0)
  • Large kontrolFreak, The amount of hip-fire clips you will get is nuts. Notice the ratio here is 1:1
• For Classic Players: (2-2-6) (160-120-100-75-5-0) (140-105-0-0-0-0)
  • No kontrolFreak, Classic-ish with a very comfortable ads for close quarters ads fights

Let me know if you have some feedbacks on this pattern or if you have been using a pattern of your own! Good Luck with the games!

Passive: Inbalance Highlight: Whenever you deal damage to an enemy through abillities or autos you apply a stack of Inbalance on them for 6s refreshing with each further stack applied and stacking up indefinitely.
Inbalance: After 6 stacks, your enemy's Magic Resist is reduced by 10-20(Based on level)% and their Attack Damage and Abillity Power are reduced by 5-10(Based on level)%. Stacks after the 6th further increase the Magic Resist reduction by 1% and the Attack Damage and Abillity Power reduction by 0.5%.
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Q - Orbs of Balance:
Cost: 50/45/40/35/30 Mana + 1 Orb of Balance
Range: 1350
Cooldown: 3s
Passive***: Every 12/10/8/6/4s create an Orb of Balance up to 2/3/4/5/6 Orbs. These Orbs orbit around you and dealing 60/80/100/120/140(+50% AP) magic damage and marking enemies for 3s. Marked enemies only take 20% of the damage from the passive Orb orbit.
Active: Channel over this abillity's duration, immobilizing yourself, for every 0.45/0.4/0.35/0.3/0.25s channeled shoot one of your orbs dealing 30/40/50/60/70(+30% AP) Magic Damage per Orb to the first enemy hit.
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W - Shining Light:
Cost: 60/70/80/90/100 Mana
Range: 3000/3500/4000/4500/5000
Cooldown:20/18/16/14/12s
Active: After 1.25s summon a shining light at the targeted location for 3s, granting vision and dealing 1/1.5/2/2.5/3(+0.5% AP)% of the targets Max Health as Magic Damage every 0.5s. Any of Kora's Orbs of Balance will instead be transfered to the light's location and orbit around it's edges. Kora regains 20/40/60/80/100(+9% bonus HP) Health while inside the light's area and is granted a 50/75/100/125/150(+35% AP, +9% bonus HP) shield. Orbs shot from within the Shining Light will always orbit to the front of the Shining Light to shoot from it and therefore will never touch the Shining Light's center.
​
​
E - Foo Wave:
Cost: 60/70/80/90/100 Mana
Range: 1100
Cooldown: 14/13/12/11/10s
Active: Kora claps his hands creating a massive soundwave that deals 100/120/140/160/180(+60% AP) magic damage and slows the enemy by 20/30/40/50/60% for 2s. If the enemy hit has 6 stacks of Inbalance, you regain 1/1/2/2/3 Orbs of Balance and this abillity stuns instead, after the 6th stack the stun duration increases by 0.1s.
​
R - Art of Balance:
Cost: 100 Mana + Atleast 1 Orb of Balance
Range: 0-4000 (150% of the Projectile Speed)
Cooldown: 120/100/80s
Width: 200(+20 per Orb of Balance consumed after the 1st)
Pull Strenght*: 200(+30 per Orb of Balance consumed after the 1st)
ProjectileSpeed: 0-2000(Based on cast distance**)
Projectile Duration: 2s
Passive: Gain 1/2/3% bonus Armor and Magic Resist per Orb Active. Increase Orb cap by +1/2/3 when this abillity is not on cooldown.
Active: Instant casting(Under 0.35s) will use this abillity consuming only 1 Orb of Balance, after 0.35s, every 0.2s consume another orb of Balance to empower this abillity. Launch Mega Orb that deals 80/120/160(+40% AP) Magic Damage + 40/50/60(+20% AP) magic Damage per orb consumed after the first one. The Mega Orb pulls enemies to it's center and applies a stack of inbalance every 0.75s to enemies it pulls.
​
*Pull Strenght: Basically pushes enemies towards it's center. An enemy with 200 speed moving away from the center with a Pull Force of 200 will be immobilized. An enemy with 100 speed moving away from the center with a Pull force of 200 will be pulled at a speed of 100. An enemy with 300 speed moving away from the center with a Pull Force of 200 will move away at a speed of 100. Basically it uses vectors to calculate the direction the pulled target will go.
​
**Ult's Projectile Speed:
CastRange: 0-250: 0 Projectile Speed
CastRange: 251-500: 250 Projectile Speed
CastRange: 501-750: 500 Projectile Speed
CastRange: 751-1000: 1000 Projectile Speed
CastRange: 1001 and above: 2000 Projectile Speed
​
***Orbs of Balance(Passive): Orbs of Balance orbit around Kora at around 1 loop/1.5s. This means with 6 orbs, each second 4 Orbs will deal damage to the enemy(With 9 orbs, 6 orbs will deal damage instead.)
​
Builds:
Full AP: Burst Mage
Tank: Top LaneSupport
​
Playstyle:
Mage: You want to poke with Q until the enemy reaches 6 stacks and then use E to stun them and Q them for a quick burst. You can use E to gain vision, help other lanes or even stack your passive in an enemy that's behind minions but you will lose your Orb's protection. You can cast it on yourself to heal yourself and even deal damage and stack passive on divers. Your Q's passive is a way to stack your passive very fast allowing you to use E to stun your enemies and get out. W + Q can also deal a fair amount of burst onto other lanes but you will become vulnerable for W's duration and you can't place W on top of the enemy otherwise the orbs won't hit, and unless the enemy is stunned it's unlikely you'll hit all of your orbs(Especially considering W's 1.25s of delay.)
Your Ult has 2 purposes, CC &Burst or Poke&Burst. Casting at max range will make it's pull almost innefective as the projectile will move much faster than it can pull and it won't apply many stacks, but it still deals a burst of damage at a high range. Casting it on top of yourself will pretty much pull sucessfully anything with less than 470 movement speed(If you consumed 9 orbs), deal high damage and apply a lot of your stacks. The main disvantage of this ult is the time it takes to channel and consume all orbs. It's usually better to use it after stunning with E or stealthily from some bushes.
Tank: Can use Mages combos, but due to lack of damage you will usually want to avoid using Q and will just try to be on top of the enemy using Q's passive to stack your passive and reduce their Magic Resist and Damage, use W almost exclusively on yourself to heal/shield yourself as it won't deal much damage without AP, E will be much easier to stun if you are able to get on top of the enemy. Your Ult will also deal much less damage so you will always want to use it on top of yourself after an E stun to extend your CC duration. After level 6 your R will give you bonus resists as long as you don't use Q.
​
Cons:
It's a very easy to exploit champ. Your burst comes from Q. Using a full Q makes you wait a long time to get a great burst gain. Using W at the wrong time far from you removes any damage from the Q's passive and active in your lane and pretty much garantees your E will be useless as well if the enemy didn't have the 6 Inbalance stacks already. E can AoE stun but if the enemies hide behind minions you will be forced to use W(Or autos) to stack your passive, during which they can exploit your lack of Orbs around you. Your Ult also requires a fairly long channel time to be effective. Missusing ult will diminish your Q's burst.
AP Kora: Struggles vs ranged enemies if they just stay behind minions because he can't stack it's passive and stun them without having to use W. Against Divers his already game is fairly simple while they don't have damage whenever they dive you use your Q's passive to stack your passive very fast and W if necessary to survive, and then just E them and use Q again for some burst or just run away, in the late game however strong assassins will just kill you before you can stack your passive on them with Q's passive Orbs(This doesn't apply to Tank Kora).
Tank Kora: Immobilize. Unlike AP Kora your ranged damage is very low, and your main source of damage comes from your Q's passive Orbs + Your Passive while your on top of the enemies, but Kora is immobile so enemies with dashes can just dash away from your orbs. Rylai's can still help but only vs enemies without dashes. Tank Kora's main purpose is to be on top of the enemy which thanks to it's passive means if he survives enough it garantees the win, in team fights however it's conditional CC means he has a much harder job getting on top of the enemies and reducing their Damage/MR.

Hold your horns, here comes Spyro!

Spyro the Dragon is, as the name suggests, a young dragon. Over the course of the series, he goes on many adventures. That's basically everything.
This RT only covers the classic timeline, and not The Legend of Spyro or Skylanders.

Dragon Breath

General Strength

• Breaks a sign
  
• Breaks urns
  
• Breaks chests
  
• Breaks barrels
  
• Breaks small windmills
  
• Breaks dune buggies
  
• Breaks flying beds
  
• Breaks boats
  
• Breaks planes
  
• Breaks a crystaline enemy
  
• Breaks a cage
  
• Blasts a metal container until it explodes
  
• Blasts a hedgehog into a stone statue hard enough to destroy it
  
• Blasts enemies into the air
  
• Blasts a sheep high into the air
  
• Blasts Ripto high into the air, SINGING his CAPE
  
• Knocks out some large sea serpents
  
• Knocks out an elephant
  
• Knocks bombs into the air
  

Fire Breath
One of Spyro's most notable abilities is breathing fire. Metal enemies are resistant to fire, but can be defeated by charging, while enemies that are too big to be charged can be knocked down with a fire attack (as seen here)

• Sparx states that Spyro's fire is at least 7800 degrees Fahrenheit
  
• Ashes Toasty's costume, scorching the grass underneath
  
• Ashes a haystack
  
• Ashes a large pencil
  
• Ashes some tents
  
• Ashes a painting
  
• Ashes a cuckoo clock
  
• Ashes a large mushroom
  
• Ashes thick thorns
  
• Ashes a gear
  
• Ashes Rhynocs, killing them
  
• Burns a tree black
  
• Burns a cactus black, which then explodes
  
• Burns a large, magic plant, causing it to revert into a seed
  
• Melts candle wax instantly
  
• Melts a block of ice a fairy is trapped in without hurting the fairy
  
• Melts a large block of ice
  
• Vaporizes a snowman
  
• Destroys two sausages and fries a dragon's facial hair
  
• Scorches Dr. Shemp's rear, sending him fleeing in pain
  
• Scorches Bianca
  
• [Burns N. Tropy, N. Brio, and N. Gin]()
  
• Fires a cannon
  
• Fires a rocket
  
• Lights a large candle
  
• Lights lighthouses
  
• Keeps "sun seeds" lit, from which a new sun can be grown
  
• Regrows a tree, somehow
  

Ice Breath
Originally, Spyro could only breathe frost with a superfreeze powerup, or altering the magic that lets him breathe fire, but in later games he gained the ability to breathe it naturally.

• His ice breath freezes monsters that are only weak to sub-zero temperatures
  
• Can freeze enemies in blocks of ice
  
• Freezes cats in large blocks of ice (along with a hockey player) while playing cat hockey
  
• Freezes a monster and his metal periscope solid, then shatters it
  
• Freezes Hunter solid
  
• Freezes a firefly that was too hot for Bianca to touch
  
• Freezes a water fountain into an ice sculpture
  
• Shapes a puddle of water into a platform
  
• Freezes a jet of water into a pole to swing on
  
• Chills a giant glass of lemonade
  
• Uses a powerup to boost the power of his freeze breath to freeze large amounts of shallow water
  
  • In later games can do this with his regular freeze breath

Electric Breath
Originally, Spyro could only use electric breath (also known as "lightning breath") with a powerup, but later gained the ability to breathe it naturally. It's effective on metal enemies and objects

• Shocks and overloads a robotic enemy
  
• Breaks the lock on a gate
  
• Starts up a navigational system
  
• Powers an energy cannon
  

Wind Breath
Spyro has the ability to breathe out powerful gusts of wind.

• Propels himself on a large frozen block of ice
  
• Can create miniature tornadoes
  
• Can charge up lightning-powered tornadoes
  

Water Breath
Spyro has the ability to breath out a spray of water. Unlike his other breath attacks, he cannot injure enemies with this, only push them back

• Pushes a water wheel
  
  • Spins a much larger wheel with a short blast

Other

• Spyro can use bubble breath to catch dragonflies and send them home
  
• Spyro can shoot bombs based on his breath types
  

Magic and Equipment

Superflame
With a fairy's kiss, or another special powerup, Spyro temporarily gains the Superflame ability. This allows him to breathe fire which is more powerful than his regular flame breath. It can either be breathed like normal, or be shot like a projectile, depending on the game.

• Capable of destroying metal spiders that Spyro could not defeat before
  
• Capable of destroying ghostly metal knights and large metal doors, as well as destroying chests which normally require alternative methods to open
  
• Capable of destroying chests which Spyro cannot break open normally
  
• Capable of destroying UFOs
  
• Capable of destroying large planters
  
• Capable of blasting large animals high into the air
  
• Capable of shooting fire underwater, strong enough to destroy metal sharks
  

Supercharge
Spyro can supercharge on special supercharge ramps (or with the help of special gates), allowing for a much faster and more powerful charge. Spyro runs so fast in this form he burns with red, then purple fire, and can smash a type of chest which he is incapable of charging through normally

• Spyro is invincible during supercharge
  
• Spyro can cross great distances by supercharging
  
• Charges through metal spiders which he could not before
  
• Charges through large metal doors
  
• Charges through cars
  
• Charges through several stone podiums
  
• Charges through a small windmill
  
• Charges through a large metal pumpkin
  
• Charges through a thick, cracked wall of ice
  
• Can charge through reinforced steel doors which can only otherwise be broken by a cannon shell
  
  • Demonstrated here

Wing Shield
Spyro has the power to shield himself with his wings and reflect attacks. It can reflect blunt objects but not piercing attacks

• Deflects a boomerang

Shadow Amulet
The Shadow Amulet is a powerful artifact which can refine and focus Spyro's magic

• Allows him to travel between the "real" world and the shadow world by standing on specific portals
  
  • He can use this to pass through barriers- but not if they are made of iron
• Can move objects with telekinesis
  
  • Opens a gate
  • Moves a stone block
  • Moves a platform
  • Moves a large platform
• Can cast a shock spell to shoot electricity
  
  • Demonstrated here
  • Knocks out the powerful dragon Red in one hit
• Can cast a cyclone spell to attack multiple enemies
  
  • Demonstrated here
• Can banish shadow creatures
  
  • Demonstrated here
• Can turn into an egg
  
• Can concentrate to divine the location of people in trouble
  
• Can teleport between teleport pads
  

Weapons

• Throws Molotov cocktails at Crash Bandcicoot to damage the wall he is on and can repair parts of his own wall
  
• Uses a bouncy ball to take out some enemies
  
• Picks up bullets from Bentley and shoots them out by spitting them, in normal and acidic explosive varieties
  

Vehicles

• Operates a weaponized vehicle
  
• Pilots a UFO
  
  • Another UFO
• Rides a magnetic contraption
  
• Rides a trolley around a dangerous track with no trouble
  
• Rides a roller coaster with a cannon attached
  
• Performs sick skateboard tricks
  
• Rides a rocket skateboard that gains fuel the more tricks he performs
  
• Rides a demolition hovercraft
  
• Rides a speedboat with a missile launcher
  
• Rides a weaponized manta ray underwater
  
• Rides a missile-launching submarine that can move through acid
  
• Rides a turret on tank treads courtesy of Agent 9, as well as a hovercraft with energy blasters
  
• Borrows Moneybags' shark-proof submarine
  
• Takes a ride on Hunter's remote-controlled plane with machine guns
  
• Rides a tank
  
• Rides a honey tank
  
• Flies a military plane
  
• Rolls around in a giant ball
  

Other

• Can spit fireballs
  
• Chases an evil spirit out of a statue by torching it
  
  • Defeats other spirits by blasting them with fire
• Can use chi attacks by flapping his wings, which can break magical shields
  
  • Demonstrated here
• Can free dragons that have been encased in crystal by Gnasty Gnorc
  
• Can temporarily fly freely with a flight powerup
  
• Can jump high into the air with a spring powerup
  
• Has a powerup which temporarily makes him invulnerable
  
  • Can walk across lava unharmed with an invulnerability powerup, as well as walk on acid
• Can spit plasma balls with a plasma ball powerup
  
• Drops a cage on Nina Cortex
  
• Can see hidden teleporters with special glasses
  

Sparx

Sparx is the dragonfly that follows Spyro, helping and protecting him, usually by collecting gems for him. His color changes depending on his health. He can also point in the direction of nearby gems.
Shooting

• Defeats some crawdads
  
• Blasts some starfish
  
• Shoots an electric eel
  
• Blows up a giant crawdad with sustained fire
  
• Defeats a large spider with sustained fire, then a giant spider
  
• Destroys a large insect with sustained fire
  
• Destroys a large bee with sustained fire
  
• Destroys a large, regenerating centipede with sustained fire
  
• Defeats a large manta ray with sustained fire
  
• Destroys a large, metal-covered beetle with sustained fire
  
• Destroys metal robots
  
• Destroys some kind of light fixture
  
• Destroys an anthill
  
• Breaks a flowerpot
  
• Blows up a box
  
• Pushes a propeller with his shots
  

Butterflies

• Eating butterflies can restore Sparx's health, but eating certain butterflies will give him special powerups
  
  • Rapid-fire powerup
  • Spread fire powerup
  • Homing firework powerup
  • Splitting powerup
  • Shield powerup

Abilities

• Can attack by charging, doing essentially anything he can do with a shot
  
• Can attack with bombs
  
• Can attack with missiles
  
• Sparx will flash to let Spyro know that he is near a portal
  
• Capable of speech
  
• Keeps up with Spyro
  

Strength

Charging

• Charges poles to knock gems off the top
  
• Charges coconut trees to shake coconuts out of them
  
• Charges a monster into a gong, knocking it out
  
• Charges a sheep into the air
  
• Charges enemies into the air
  
• Charges through heavily armored enemies, breaking their armor
  
• Charges through snowmobiles
  
• Charges through a robot
  
• Charges large, armored enemies backwards on slippery ice
  
• Charges large, stone Earthshapers backwards a fair distance
  
• Charges the large monster Buzz back repeatedly
  
• Charges the large Ineptune backwards, pushing her through water and shattering the structure she hits
  
• Charges into charging bulls, sticking their horns into the ground
  
• Charges into a birdcage, breaking it apart
  
• Charges rolling metal barrels, knocking them backwards
  
  • Charges a metal barrel across an arena
• Charges bombs across an arena
  
• Charges a giant bomb into the water
  
• Charges through large wooden crates
  
• Charges through metal chests that cannot be broken with fire
  
• Charges through Metalhead's power poles
  
• Charges through a stump
  
• Charges through a large shell
  
• Charges through a pile of rocks
  
• Charges through a large door
  
• Charges through a wall of wood planks underwater
  
• Charges through a brick wall
  
• Charges through a stone wall
  
• Charges through a large, cracked crystal
  
• Charges through a cracked stone wall underwater
  
  • Another one
• Charges through thick, cracked stone
  
  • Another one
• Charges through thick rock
  
• Charges through a large rock
  
• After having a spell cast on him to make him stronger, Spyro can charge through rocks that he could not break before
  

Headbashing

• Headbashes the ground, breaking a large rock and a metal vase without even touching them
  
• Headbashes a metal covering
  
• Headbashes rock shells that some hippos were trapped in
  
• Headbashes a boulder to pieces
  
• Headbashes an Earthshaper to pieces after Hunter stuns it with a magic arrow
  
• Headbashes a stuck elevator to get it moving again
  
• Headbashes a thick layer of ice
  
• Headbashes a thick layer of stone
  

Spitting

• Eats and spits out a projectile hard enough to defeat an enemy
  
• Spits out a baseball hard enough to activate a dunk tank
  
• Spits a rock at a target hard enough to make it explode into pieces
  

Other

• Butt-stomps a TV to crush it
  
• Body-slams a large stone "R" statue
  
• Turns a cannon
  
• Wins a tug of war against an enemy
  
• Balances three stone slabs on his head
  

Agility

Mobility

• Can double jump
  
• Can charge for an extra burst of speed
  
• Can glide and hover, as well as fly freely in certain areas.
  
• Can swim and charge underwater indefinitely
  
• Can swing from horizontal poles
  
• Can kick off walls to wall jump
  
• Can climb and jump up ladders
  
  • Dodges falling lava rocks while climbing up ladders

Movement

• Keeps up with Sparx
  
• Outruns collapsing floor
  
• Catches up to and flames Bianca
  
• Jumps out of the way of Ineptune's breath attack
  
• Jumps out of the way of Nina Cortex's charge
  
• Can jump over blasts from paintball guns
  
  • Of note, in the original game, these are real guns that fire bullets
• Can jump over gatling gun fire from enemy dinosaurs
  
• Can jump over energy shockwaves from Crush's jumps
  
• Can jump over the shockwaves of force from Gulp's jumps
  
• Can jump over gusts of wind blown by Rhynocs
  
• Dodges a surprise energy bolt
  

Other

• Quickly turns a crank to shred up a block of solid ice
  
• Quickly cranks a device to put out a fire
  

Durability

Blunt Force

• Is barely phased by charging into an unyielding object, or even supercharging into walls
  
  • Is unphased by headbashing through large rocks
• Unhurt by being shaken and thrown by a large snowman
  
• Gets stomped on by a woolly mammoth and is fine later
  
• Falls an unclear distance
  

Explosive

• Withstands an explosion that destroys a gate
  
• Unhurt by firing himself out of a cannon
  

Temperature

• Can swim in water covered by thick ice
  
• Unhurt by running through a burning campfire
  

Swallowing and Spitting

• Can swallow and spit out burning lava rocks without injury
  
• Can swallow and spit out acidic, smoking rocks without injury
  
• Can swallow and spit rockets out of his mouth
  

Other

• Resists a magic-draining magic that even the Dragon Elders were powerless against

Skill

Hockey Skill

• Perfects a two-on-two hockey game by eating and spitting out the puck
  
• Beat a Rhynoc in cat hockey so badly that he retired from hockey permanently
  

Combat Skill

• Learns dragon-kata from a martial arts expert and is described as having a natural talent.
  
  • He learned it quickly enough to impress his teacher
• Can target weak points on an opponent's body for increased damage
  
• Defeats ninja Rhynocs
  

Misc Skill

• Carries a live duckling in his mouth without injuring it
  
• Shreds electric guitar
  

"I thought that dragons had all been dead for a thousand years, or something."
"Well, the rumors about our extinction were slightly exaggerated."

"Oh, Spy Fox? You're going to be busy on this rescue mission. Should I call the Spy Academy and tell them to cancel the weapons class you're going to teach?" "What? You're going to tell them that Spy Fox doesn't have class? They'll never believe you."
A spy working for Spy Corp, Spy Fox is one of several agents sent into the field to foil the schemes of supervillains, be they seeking to rid a certain food from the market, bring governments to their knees with an enormous robot dog, destroy the ozone layer so they can profit on incredibly strong sunscreen, or just thieves stealing cheese from a museum. Alongside the administrative help of Monkeypenny and the various gadgets of Professor Quack, Spy Fox inevitably saves the day while barely ever opening his eyes more than halfway or removing his hands from the pockets of his white suit.

Legend

1 - Spy Fox in: Dry Cereal
2 - Spy Fox 2: Some Assembly Required
3 - Spy Fox 3: Operation Ozone
CC - Spy Fox in: Cheese Chase
HtM - Spy Fox in: Hold the Mustard
Web - Spy Fox promotional content from the Humongous Entertainment website accessed through the Wayback Machine, accessible here

Strength

Striking

• Claims he normally karate chops doors open, but can't do it to one made of steel¹
• Knocks away a rhino and an elephant by spinning with skis as he passed them²
• Crumples the roof of a car by jumping onto it^CC

Lifting

• Lifts a large rooster over his head and swings him about¹
• Holds up a 'Really Big Award' at arms length³
• Holds an anvil, a safe, and an anchor at arm's length while falling¹
  • Also does this with a taxi cab and a small tank¹

Other

• Catches himself from falling with one hand before throwing himself into the air with that hand²
• Catches himself from falling by biting onto a platform³
• Ski jumps a great distance onto a passing plane²
• Unaffected by a net as he skis through it²

Durability

Blunt Force

• Is seemingly beaten up off-screen and thrown away¹
• Rides a rocket skateboard through a door³
• Launched through a ceiling, causing a large amount of clatter through other obstacles off-screen after²
• Repeatedly slammed against a table while having a massage²
• Bounces off of his head without reacting²
• Kicked high into the air by a robot and falls back to the ground¹
• Hit by a giant sticky object and is trapped to it while it bounces / rolls along with enough force to shatter stone pillars, before falling down the stone steps outside the temple³
• Repeatedly slammed by an enormous powder puff³

Falling

• Skis down a sheer surface, on a short roof, and along the ground without any reaction²
• Drops from a gyrocopter onto his scooter held within a dumpster^CC
• Jumps from cable car to the ground below, rolling down a hill as a snowball, before hitting the doorway of a cabin and emerging unharmed²
• Slides down a ladder from the mouth of a mech dog before jumping off at the end, landing unharmed²
• Falls down a great distance onto a caravan, crumpling it, and is unharmed^CC

Other

• Unaffected by his ice skates exploding while being worn²
• Gets whipped, folded into a paper airplane, and bundled into a ball while being given a massage²
• Blown back by sound without harm³

Speed

• Whisks his foot away before a snapping turtle can bite it¹
• Dodges a boxing glove defense system when the direction it would punch in wasn't clear until it fired²
• Dashes short distances quickly³
• In an instant runs from the Caped Cod, picks up a child fan, and runs back²
  • This is the distance he covered²
• Runs in the air to get back to land before falling in water¹

Skill

• Briefly juggles²
• Bowls a strike³
• Has the agility to flip about¹
• Balances on a tiny flying device²
• Flips a switch on the ground into his pocket²
• Somehow steals the remote for King Konglomerate's rocket while going straight from his ship to a lift into the rocket's room^HtM
• Using an instructional book, defeats a Cock-A-Doodle-Fu master with a counter move, then ties him up while holding him above his head¹
• Won the Spy Corp Freestyle Ski Jump Competition²
• Can dance the foxtrot, waltz, and tango²

Suit

• His suit has deep pockets, described as being able to hold 'a nearly unlimited number of items' in Operation Ozone³
  • Holds a small trash bag inside of it²
  • Pockets a jumpsuit¹
  • Pockets a frog suit, shown here in its full size worn by Spy Fox¹
  • Pockets a large venus fly trap and its pot, with some effort²
• One of his suits has a parachute in it¹

Spy Watch

• Allows him to contact and be contacted by Monkeypenny back at their mobile base¹
• Connects to a bug he placed in a cat's handbag as she speeds away in a sports car¹
• Records and sends a villain's monologue about his plan²
• Gets sent and stores coordinates¹
• Prints a three fruit code transmitted to it²
• Can play games²
• Also functions as a watch³

Spy Gadgets

Spy Fox can carry up to four of these at a time.
Combat-Focused

• The Spy Trap, a coin which traps explodes into a net to trap three or more enemies on the ceiling¹
  • Used here¹
• Sticky Stun Bun, which explodes to stun everyone within ten feet, "Leaving them dazed ad confused for weeks" according to the inventor³
  • Used here, sending the minions around it flying back into the air and trapping them against a wall with caramel³
• Bagpipes which spray a large amount of smoke. This smoke appears to have an adverse affect on people inhaling it, possibly stunning them, as Spy Fox dons a gas mask before walking through³

Wearables

• Duck Blind, a hat which renders the wearer invisible to ducks³
  • Used here, but it's destroyed after a period of use³
• Night Vision Shoe, a shoe that acts like night vision goggles¹
  • Used here¹
• Hush-Hush Moccasians, shoes which allow him to walk extremely quietly so even a room full of goons with 'oversized ears' don't notice him^Web
• Dehydrated Skis, a pair of skis inside a tiny pill which grow when put in water²
  • Used here²
• Spy Skates, a pair of ice skates which allow the user to perform any ice skating routine when their instructions are placed within the skates²
  • Used here, blowing up after use²
• Gopher Guise equipped with Extra-Strength Earth Moving Claws, letting him quickly dig through overhanging roots and caved in tunnels underground^Web
  • Is biodegradable^Web
• Suction Cufflinks, tiny suction cups for climbing across non-porous metal surfaces¹
  • Used here, increasing in size and letting Spy Fox climb across a sheer metal wall¹

Mechanical

• Alarm Deactivator, an elaborately described piece of equipment for ensuring alarms don't go off which is actually just two alligator clips connected by a wire²
  • Used here²
• Cheese and Safe Cracker Kit, which uses very scientific processes to determine the combination of a safe¹
  • Shown here¹
• Fingerprint Replicator Utensil Kit, a fork which copies the fingerprints of whoever wields it and sends them to the paired spoon²
  • Used here, working through a glove²
  • The spoon can be used on handprint identifying device²
• Spy Key Replicator Kit, a camera which takes a photo of a key, the photo being put into an oven to shrink and take the form of that key. If the wrong key is made, it can be inserted back into the camera and turned back into film, as it can only store one shot at a time²
  • Used here taking a photo, being baked, and the resultant key being used to open a door²
• Stealth Vac, a silent vacuum²
  • Used here, sucking liquid from a machine into it without alerting the supervillain right next to it²
  • Later blows the liquid into an identical machine equally quietly²
• Spy Toaster, which launches whatever spy is within it 20 feet into the air³
  • Used here³
• The Insta-Jack, a tiny red pill which turns into a hydraulic lift when thrown to the ground^Web
• The Artful Articulator device, which would allow him to understand a person muffled due to being trapped with cotton candy and maple syrup^Web
• Rocket Powered Origami Skateboard, which originally takes the form of a single piece of paper but with three simple steps folds into a skateboard propelled by a rocket with enough force to break a Spy Fox hole in a door³
  • Works over water, sending Spy Fox a great distance into the sky while going up a ramp, and has the wheels fall away to let him gently slide down a hill of sheep³
  • Crumples to nothing after a while³
• Spy Pearl Detector, which scans over a bed of oysters, the light on top flashing faster the closer it is to a pearl³
  • Used here, giving a camera view inside the oysters³
• Spy Bowling Ball, rolled towards a bowling pin to capture it and whatever's attached to it, bringing it back to Spy Fox³
  • Used here on a duck tied up to look like a bowling pin³

Destruction

• Laser Toothbrush and Minty Fresh Laser Gel, used together to cut through thick steel¹
  • Shown here, blowing up after use¹
• Termite Grenade, a grenade with termites for destroying a wooden object²
  • Used here, turning a wooden statue of a man to a large pile of dust in an instant²
• Rust Buster, a one-use spray can which makes whatever metal object it covers become rusted and brittle to the point of falling apart³
  • Used here, rusting four large saw blades and allowing Spy Fox to blow them away immediately after. Using it destroys the can³
• A drilling device made of extra-strength paper-mâché and coated with a hi-tech polymer, used to drill through multiple feet of ice^Web

Other

• Grappling Granny, a grappling hook which latches onto wood with a pair of false teeth³
  • Used here³
• Swiss Spy Knife, containing a fork, a toothpick, and a pair of chromium-alloy high tensile strength wire cutters that can cut through sheer metal³
  • The wire cutters easily snip through a steel net which the Swiss Spy Knife's fork snapped on³
• Spy Putty, used to create a perfect copy of whatever it's pressed against¹
  • Used to copy an invitation and get past a doorman after being inspected, when the original invitation had a golden edge, a wax seal, and was expensively embossed and hand written¹
• Beef Flavour X-Ray Gum which is held up against 'something beefy' to show inside it¹
  • Shown here¹
• Spy Heat, heat in a can²
  • Used here, making a giant thermometer read over 150 degrees Fahrenheit, but the can is destroyed after use²
• Canned Laughter, a grenade which fills the area its thrown into with laughter³
  • Used here³
• Handcuffs disguised as a large, frosty beverage^CC
• Hair growing cream^Web
• Extra-Glittery Ball o' Foil Stuffed with Catnip, an extra-glittery ball of foil stuffed with catnip used to distract a cat supervillain while syllables away from world domination^Web
• Spy Mint, a minty fresh mint which glows in the dark to light areas up, also working underwater³
  • Used here³
• Spy Ear, a glass which allows the user to listen through solid glass³
  • Used here³
• His organization used a device to create a smoke screen or mirage of a fake factory in front of every limburger cheese factory in the world, though it's unclear whether Spy Fox himself helped use it^Web

Pens

A variety of items potentially held within pens in the opening of Dry Cereal. He holds four in his suit pocket.

• Balloon filled with something that isn't helium¹
• A whoopie cushion which is thrown to the ground beneath him, allowing him to land without any injury¹
• A pogo stick, nullifying any harm from falling by landing on it, though it rockets back into the air once Spy Fox steps off¹
• A cake¹
• Fishing rod used to slow his descent by latching onto a nearby helicopter¹
• An anvil¹
• An anchor¹
• A safe¹
• A taxi cab¹
• A small tank¹

Other Items

• Owns Goldi-lock pickers, which he claims would let him easily open a locked metal door he'd find impossible to unlock without²
• A digital make up compact intercepted by Spy Corp, which displays the required response to a stated codephrase when the appropriate section is pushed down³
• A jackhammer, a crowbar, and a blowtorch³
• A rabbit and his Spy Corp I.D.³
• An oven glove²
• A Gyrocopter, flown by him and Professor Quack with a spotlight^CC

Spy Car

A car with a variety of functions driven in Dry Cereal and Operation Ozone.
Physicals

• Bounces off from a fall¹
• Drops from Spy Corp's mobile base after being repaired³
  • The distance it fell³
• Can drive between continents in a short span of time. Exactly how it does this is unclear, but it's seen dropping from the sky and driving directly vertically³
  • How long this takes also isn't known, but multiple trips to all continents is required and the game takes place over the course of several hours³

Forms

• Becomes a jet to fly off¹
  • Takes a similar form to boost himself up and across a gap¹
• Becomes a helicopter¹
• Becomes a boring machine with a drill appearing from the front, creating a tunnel through rocks blocking off a road¹
• Turns into a submarine, complete with periscope, before jumping out of the water¹
  • A similar form which just withdraws the wheels and creates propellers from the back³

Other Equipment

• A long arm to pick up and drop off Spy Fox¹
  • Rescues a falling Spy Fox using this³
• Inflates padding beneath it after falling off a cliff¹
• A parachute¹
• A radar which follows a trail left by another spy¹

Super Duper Spy Scooter

A multi-environment scooter which is initially stored within a dumpster before being used throughout Cheese Chase.^CC
Physicals

• Breaks wooden barriers by riding through them^CC
• Shatters fences by driving into them^CC
• Rides through barrels, shattering them^CC
• Badly dents metal pipes by hitting them^CC
• Knocks other vehicles about^CC
• Travels over whirlpools, just making the scooter spin a bit^CC
• Covers a notable distance after riding up a ramp^CC
• Quickly drives down a building and speeds from it into the foreground^CC

Forms

• Shifts from a land scooter to a speedbike^CC
• Turns from a jet ski to a snowmobile^CC
• Goes from being a snowmobile to a jet flying through the air^CC
• Transforms between its flying and scooter forms^CC

Weapons

• Can pick up from crates and fire forwards plungers, pies, and two bananas simultaneously. All of these are capable of the same strength feats^CC
• Topples over quad bikes^CC
• Sinks a small enemy ship^CC
• Buries twin tread snowmobiles^CC
• Takes down larger snowmobiles with a front ski and two large back treads, burying them in the snow^CC
• Shoots similar jets out of the sky^CC

M.E.S.S.

The Multiple Environment Spy Ship, a mobile ship Spy Fox uses to fly around in Hold the Mustard.
Blaster
The main weapon, capable of destroying large robots with a single blast.^HtM With a significant amount of blasts, it can destroy:

• A large metal transmitter^HtM
• A significant amount of stone^HtM
• The front of an airship^HtM
• The enormous metal jaw of a ship^HtM

Power Ups

• Homing missiles^HtM
• A shorter range blast which releases a burst of red energy around it, destroying all nearby robots^HtM
• Makes the ship invincible for a period, capable of running through robots without injury but still risking damage and destruction from walls^HtM
• One token fully heals the M.E.S.S.^HtM
• Extra lives^HtM

Other

• Highly maneuverable^HtM
• Bashes off of walls, but takes damage^HtM
• Can travel underwater, using air instead of fuel, which replenishes on breaching the surface^HtM
• Through booster rockets, can travel to and fly about in space^HtM
• Refuels by flying through floating gates^HtM
• On the ship's destruction, ejects Spy Fox in a floating capsule^HtM
• Had an upgrade, the Super M.E.S.S., which repeatedly bashes against a force field with seemingly no injury, has enough space for multiple agents, and is equipped with a can opener to cut open a space base³

Other

• Translates hieroglyphics from an ancient language, though what they translate to is rather self-evident¹
• Doesn't shift gears in his cars while in pursuit of bad guys because he can't be bothered with that sort of thing³
• Quickly changes outfits¹
  • Literally throws on and tears off a diving suit³
• Disguises himself as a tumbleweed, using it as cover to getting into the middle of an area without being seen and letting it blow off without him after³
• Is a terrible secret agent³
  • I mean seriously, he just tells everyone what he is³
  • This isn't even a spy thing in this universe, a Canadian spy tells him to cut out using her name too often²
  • He even was presented the highest award the President of the United States could give to him in a highly publicized and reported event, isn't that the exact opposite of what he should want¹
  • Even some slight competency stops him from foiling the villain's plans due to how he announces himself first how is this guy still hired³

"So Spy Fox, what's your next step?" "That's an excellent question. I'm already pretty good at the foxtrot, the waltz, and the tango, but I've always wanted to learn how to swing." "Hmm...how fortunate to the world that your crime fighting is better than your sense of humour."