Coffin green ombre nails
Don't get your hopes up, we are done for the near future as far as winning a chip goes
2023.06.05 03:06 annoyedboy671 Don't get your hopes up, we are done for the near future as far as winning a chip goes
Being stuck with Ham, father time getting the upper hand over Lebron inevitably soon, our team being less deep than this past season, and last but not least AD being so injury prone. Imagining switching Spoelstra and Ham confirms my doubts. Heat wouldnt even make the second round and Lakers-Denver wouldve been a completely different series.
The only chance we become a contender is if we get a miracle trade for Lillard giving us a formidable big 3 for a final 2-year chip push with Lebron, but even then, with brain dead Ham I don't like our chances. Firing Vogel for Ham put the nail in our coffin for the next few years. Second biggest bonehead move after the Westbrick trade.
submitted by annoyedboy671 to lakers [link] [comments]
The only chance we become a contender is if we get a miracle trade for Lillard giving us a formidable big 3 for a final 2-year chip push with Lebron, but even then, with brain dead Ham I don't like our chances. Firing Vogel for Ham put the nail in our coffin for the next few years. Second biggest bonehead move after the Westbrick trade.
2023.06.05 02:53 I_Love_Cyndaquil2 Burnt out.
Let me paint a picture for you.
Within a dark basement room, illuminated only by the pale blue of a setting sun, dusty paper and cardboard covers the floor, some of the paper has math equations and some has notes on history, some paper talks of the current economy and the government. On the floor, faint music can be heard, it blares the distinct sound of heavy metal and rock, but where is it?
In the back left corner sit two gerbils, one beige and one grey, the top of the 50 gallon tank collects dust, they may not have much in terms of human interaction, yet they have all they need inside the cage, a perfect bedding depth that is changed weekly, a big wheel, a sand bath, and all homemade cardboard toys from safe non-toxic glues.
Near the entrance to the room a love seat presses against a blue wall, yet this couch has not been sat on in weeks, instead it is home to more paper and pencils as well as half finished crochet projects that have been tossed to the side as they have never been finished.
To the far left side of the room, a fireplace can be seen, however, this fireplace has not had any fire in a long time, inside it hosts a wide variety of cobwebs, while ashes and dust scatter the bottom of it.
To the far right side of the room an old worn down altar can be seen, upon first glance the table could be mistaken for antique, yet on closer inspection you would find it is merely in awful condition. Around the table a wide variety of candles, paper, and dusty jars containing different ingredients are found. The candles come in black, blue, red, and yellow, as well as green, pink, orange, and brown. The papers are covered in chicken-scratch writing in what appears to be another language. Yet all of them list the same things, spells, the language is a mere alphabet known as Theban. The jars contain egg shells and snail shells, charcoal and ashes, colourful stones and preserved flowers, needles and rusty nails.
The centre of the room is home to a wall-mounted television, the last time the screen changed was the early morning, beneath the television is a cedar chest, on top of the chest you will find granola bar wrappers and peels of various fruits as well as pop cans and water bottles, beside the garbage is old dishes, mugs that have old half drank coffee and plates covered in maple syrup from old waffles and pancakes, this is easily the most lived in part of the room.
A few feet away from the chest, and next to the altar is a sofa, it seems to be the reason paper covers the floor as every time the cushions move a paper falls to the floor. On the far left side of the sofa, near the entrance to the room sits a 15 year old fat boy with messy blonde hair. Caked on grease covers his face as he stares down at a math sheet, a pen in his right hand and a calculator in his left.
The boy is attempting to solve math equations, yet he is so burnt out, that despite reading the question over and over the words do not seem to make sense. The boy looks down at his wrists, pink shiny scars stare back, a reminder of what happened.
His mind flashes memories, he remembers waking to police at 5, he remembers watching his brothers fights, he remembers the time people attempted breaking into his house to kill his brother, he remembers everything.
He remembers his mother saying she wishes she never had him.
The boy feels sick now, a knot in his stomach and he looks at the calendar hung across the room, he counts 18 days left of school.
The knot tightens, for the coming summer does not mean a time of relaxation and recovery, it means fighting and stress. This homework does not symbolize a chance at passing, it symbolizes a failing future.
He reads the question again, “Solve using either elimination or substitution. Be sure to write a therefore statement. Check the solution using a LS/RS chart for both equations.
4x - 3y = - 2
2x + y = 8”
He knows what to do, all he has to do is pick up the pencil and write, but he seems to be frozen, staring at the page.
A lady walks down the stairs, “Are you doing your homework?” She asks.
“Yeah… Yeah, sorry I’ll get to it.” He starts writing but stops, the steps to solving it have gone, he’s forgotten everything.
The lady walks away, angry, the boy lifts his pencil, he swiftly lowers it to his ankle, he lifts his pant leg and slices, the burning sensation of a scratch covers his leg as it begins to form a long red line, it matches all the others, scars and scabs, scratches and cuts. Fresh and dry blood.
A sense of relief fills the boy, he lifts his pencil and goes to solve the equation, but again, he forgot it.
Instead he picks up his phone and begins to type, he describes the room he is in, he describes what he just did.
The lady comes back, it’s his mother, yet he doesn’t consider her one, she screams at him, tells him to get back to work, he heard the words, but they don’t seem to make sense, as if his brain has stopped translating the language.
And he describes it as it happens.
And then he posts the story as he feels fresh blood from the new cut trickle down his leg.
submitted by I_Love_Cyndaquil2 to mentalillness [link] [comments]
Within a dark basement room, illuminated only by the pale blue of a setting sun, dusty paper and cardboard covers the floor, some of the paper has math equations and some has notes on history, some paper talks of the current economy and the government. On the floor, faint music can be heard, it blares the distinct sound of heavy metal and rock, but where is it?
In the back left corner sit two gerbils, one beige and one grey, the top of the 50 gallon tank collects dust, they may not have much in terms of human interaction, yet they have all they need inside the cage, a perfect bedding depth that is changed weekly, a big wheel, a sand bath, and all homemade cardboard toys from safe non-toxic glues.
Near the entrance to the room a love seat presses against a blue wall, yet this couch has not been sat on in weeks, instead it is home to more paper and pencils as well as half finished crochet projects that have been tossed to the side as they have never been finished.
To the far left side of the room, a fireplace can be seen, however, this fireplace has not had any fire in a long time, inside it hosts a wide variety of cobwebs, while ashes and dust scatter the bottom of it.
To the far right side of the room an old worn down altar can be seen, upon first glance the table could be mistaken for antique, yet on closer inspection you would find it is merely in awful condition. Around the table a wide variety of candles, paper, and dusty jars containing different ingredients are found. The candles come in black, blue, red, and yellow, as well as green, pink, orange, and brown. The papers are covered in chicken-scratch writing in what appears to be another language. Yet all of them list the same things, spells, the language is a mere alphabet known as Theban. The jars contain egg shells and snail shells, charcoal and ashes, colourful stones and preserved flowers, needles and rusty nails.
The centre of the room is home to a wall-mounted television, the last time the screen changed was the early morning, beneath the television is a cedar chest, on top of the chest you will find granola bar wrappers and peels of various fruits as well as pop cans and water bottles, beside the garbage is old dishes, mugs that have old half drank coffee and plates covered in maple syrup from old waffles and pancakes, this is easily the most lived in part of the room.
A few feet away from the chest, and next to the altar is a sofa, it seems to be the reason paper covers the floor as every time the cushions move a paper falls to the floor. On the far left side of the sofa, near the entrance to the room sits a 15 year old fat boy with messy blonde hair. Caked on grease covers his face as he stares down at a math sheet, a pen in his right hand and a calculator in his left.
The boy is attempting to solve math equations, yet he is so burnt out, that despite reading the question over and over the words do not seem to make sense. The boy looks down at his wrists, pink shiny scars stare back, a reminder of what happened.
His mind flashes memories, he remembers waking to police at 5, he remembers watching his brothers fights, he remembers the time people attempted breaking into his house to kill his brother, he remembers everything.
He remembers his mother saying she wishes she never had him.
The boy feels sick now, a knot in his stomach and he looks at the calendar hung across the room, he counts 18 days left of school.
The knot tightens, for the coming summer does not mean a time of relaxation and recovery, it means fighting and stress. This homework does not symbolize a chance at passing, it symbolizes a failing future.
He reads the question again, “Solve using either elimination or substitution. Be sure to write a therefore statement. Check the solution using a LS/RS chart for both equations.
4x - 3y = - 2
2x + y = 8”
He knows what to do, all he has to do is pick up the pencil and write, but he seems to be frozen, staring at the page.
A lady walks down the stairs, “Are you doing your homework?” She asks.
“Yeah… Yeah, sorry I’ll get to it.” He starts writing but stops, the steps to solving it have gone, he’s forgotten everything.
The lady walks away, angry, the boy lifts his pencil, he swiftly lowers it to his ankle, he lifts his pant leg and slices, the burning sensation of a scratch covers his leg as it begins to form a long red line, it matches all the others, scars and scabs, scratches and cuts. Fresh and dry blood.
A sense of relief fills the boy, he lifts his pencil and goes to solve the equation, but again, he forgot it.
Instead he picks up his phone and begins to type, he describes the room he is in, he describes what he just did.
The lady comes back, it’s his mother, yet he doesn’t consider her one, she screams at him, tells him to get back to work, he heard the words, but they don’t seem to make sense, as if his brain has stopped translating the language.
And he describes it as it happens.
And then he posts the story as he feels fresh blood from the new cut trickle down his leg.
2023.06.05 02:35 Ragnurs_KL Fan theory: Amon Goeth (from the Schindler's List movie) and Andrew are the same person
 | More than a theory, it is a fact with all the evidence Because after I show you the evidence submitted by Ragnurs_KL to CoffinofAndyandLeyley [link] [comments] You'll know why it's so obvious that Nemlei (the creator of the game) was inspired by the antagonist of Stephen Spielberg's Schindler's List movie to create Andrew, but he wasn't just an inspiration, he actually made Andrew's character was like Amon Goeth himself but in his past, when he was a young man First things first, the movie already uses a black and white style to show the whole story, and on the other hand the video game itself uses the same aesthetic, in black and white, which proves that Nemlei borrowed this style from the movie to use it and give a unique touch to the game, at the same time that it subliminally exposes that the history of Schindler's List and that of The Coffin of Andy and Leyley are totally linked Surely they will say "but Andrew and Amon have different names" that is true but this is where Nemlei uses his wits again to hide the things that are in front of us, if we see, Andrew and Amon's name begins with the letter "A" and both contain the letter "N" another subliminal message that reveals the similarity of both, even in their last names, it is known that the last name Goeth is related to something gothic, dark, cruel, something that fits perfectly with Andrew, and on the other hand the surname Graves is relative to someone strong and serious, both surnames perfectly describe Andrew and Amon, therefore it is evident that Andrew's true full name would be: Amon Andrew Graves Goeth. And Ashley never calls him Amon because she probably doesn't like that name In addition, in the scene where Amon checks his fingers, you can see that those fingers are practically the same as Andrew's Well, we must take into account that Ashley and Andrew lived in a city governed by what seems to be a clear totalitarian and fascist government, therefore it is not very difficult to imagine that this government was Nazi Germany itself controlling its citizens, preventing them from leaving of the house, though the reason for this is unknown Now, one of the most obvious proofs that proves my whole theory is the immense resemblance between Amon Goeth and Andrew, they both look alike, even in one of the scenes from Schindler's List where Amon is in the field of fire Plaszow turns his gaze in another direction after speaking with one of the prisoners, the enormous similarity between these two supposedly different individuals is revealed, now, as if there were no more evidence, there is the attitude of both, they are both very serious, strange Sometimes they laugh, although Amon does laugh in the movie, those occasions are very rare, not to mention that neither of them is remorseful about killing. However, one of the most surprising pieces of evidence that I could find in my arduous research was that the actor who plays Amon Goeth, Ralph Fiennes, has GREEN eyes in real life, just like... yes, you guessed it, just like Andrew, which only reinforces the FACT that Nemlei was inspired by Stephen Spielberg's work to create Andrew as a past in Amon's youth before serving in the SS, and included him in his video game Something that, however, almost dismantles my theory is that Ashley does not appear on Schindler's List in any way, but I was delighted when I was able to find a solid explanation that would reconstruct the entire veracity of my theory. You see, although the game has not yet been continued and finished, it is not unreasonable to think that in the end one of the brothers will die, this can unfortunately be Ashley, how? I cannot answer that, but it is clear that he will die, which will cause Andrew to become mentally destabilized, and this mental destability would be demonstrated against the prisoners in Plaszow in the future. Also, possibly Ashley would be killed at the end of the game, which explains why Andrew, being Amon Goeth in the movie, is not capable of forgiving anyone. Thank you very much if you read everything, this theory really cost me to do it, due to the little interest that has been had for this possibility, in any case I hope that this has at least changed the way you see both the game and the movie. |
2023.06.05 01:53 lumberjawsh [FOR SALE] Metal, Prog, Hardcore, Screamo, Grind etc etc
Records for Sale! Lots of metal, prog, hardcore, grind, etc. Couple hip hop LPs. Many of these are unplayed or only played once, just transferred into anti-static sleeves/polyjackets. Free shipping for 1 item in the US, add $1 more for 2 items and so on, International buyers will get a separate invoice for shipping, usually between $20-25 for shipping to Canada or Europe. Highly motivated seller, please make me an offer. Price discounts for bundles :)
$20 Abnormality – Contaminating The Hive Mind - Blue w/ Black Splatter /250 - NM/NM
$15 Abnormality – Sociopathic Constructs - Rootbeer Marbled /200 - NM/NM
Take Both Abnormality Records for $30
$15 An Isle Ate Her – Phrenia - Clear w/ Black Splatter /300 - NM/NM
$10 August Burns Red – Looks Fragile After All - Cream /750 - NM/NM
$120 Blut Aus Nord – Memoria Vetusta I «Fathers Of The Icy Age» - Wax Mage XXX Edition /52 - NM/VG+ - Small Corner bump on jacket from shipping
$50 Cold as Life – In Memory Of Rodney A. Barger (1970-93) - Detroit Black Ice White/Black Smash /500 - NM/NM
$35 Every Time I Die – New Junk Aesthetic - Milky Clear w/ Gold Splatter /500 - NM/NM
$100 Every Time I Die – Radical - Pink with Screen Printed Numbered Alternate Cover Designed, Autographed and Numbered by Jordan Buckley /100 - NM/NM
$50 Every Time I Die – Radical - Pink with Screen Printed Numbered Alternate Cover (Green Alt Cover /150) - NM/NM
$20 Freddie Gibbs & Madlib – Piñata '74 - RSD, /2000 - NM/NM
$60 Full Of Hell – Garden Of Burning Apparitions - Alt Cover /150, Silver Vinyl /3700 - NM/NM
$100 Hawak/Joliette/Our Future Is An Absolute Shadow/Eyelet/Elle/Burial Etiquette – Cube - Test Press /5 - NM/NM
$20 The Locust – Safety Second, Body Last - Brown Inside Beer /500 - NM/NM
$15 Nails – You Will Never Be One Of Us - Standard Black Vinyl - VG+/VG+
$10 Pageninetynine / Majorityrule – Document #12 - Grey Marbled /540 - VG+/VG+
$60 Prayer For Cleansing – The Rain In Endless Fall - White Vinyl /425 - NM/NM
$20 Primus – Conspiranoid - Grey w/ White Splatter /500 - NM/NM
$20 See You Next Tuesday – Distractions - Baby Blue / Neon Yellow Smash /200 - NM/NM
$20 See You Next Tuesday – Distractions - Clear w/ Neon Yellow/Pink/Coral Splatter /300 - NM/NM
$200 The Severnaya Complex – Discography -Clear w/ Purple , Black & Glow-In-The-Dark Green Splatter /30 - NM/NM
$60 Three 6 Mafia – Most Known Unknown - Black & Silver Streak w/ OBI /500 - NM/NM
$50 - Trenchlung – Hiraeth Collection- Blue Translucent w/ Black Swirl /100 - NM/NM
$90 - The Used – Self Titled - Bone & Ultra Clear Pinwheel w/ Maroon Splatter w/ OBI /500 - NM/NM
submitted by lumberjawsh to VinylCollectors [link] [comments]
$20 Abnormality – Contaminating The Hive Mind - Blue w/ Black Splatter /250 - NM/NM
$15 Abnormality – Sociopathic Constructs - Rootbeer Marbled /200 - NM/NM
Take Both Abnormality Records for $30
$15 An Isle Ate Her – Phrenia - Clear w/ Black Splatter /300 - NM/NM
$10 August Burns Red – Looks Fragile After All - Cream /750 - NM/NM
$120 Blut Aus Nord – Memoria Vetusta I «Fathers Of The Icy Age» - Wax Mage XXX Edition /52 - NM/VG+ - Small Corner bump on jacket from shipping
$50 Cold as Life – In Memory Of Rodney A. Barger (1970-93) - Detroit Black Ice White/Black Smash /500 - NM/NM
$35 Every Time I Die – New Junk Aesthetic - Milky Clear w/ Gold Splatter /500 - NM/NM
$100 Every Time I Die – Radical - Pink with Screen Printed Numbered Alternate Cover Designed, Autographed and Numbered by Jordan Buckley /100 - NM/NM
$50 Every Time I Die – Radical - Pink with Screen Printed Numbered Alternate Cover (Green Alt Cover /150) - NM/NM
$20 Freddie Gibbs & Madlib – Piñata '74 - RSD, /2000 - NM/NM
$60 Full Of Hell – Garden Of Burning Apparitions - Alt Cover /150, Silver Vinyl /3700 - NM/NM
$100 Hawak/Joliette/Our Future Is An Absolute Shadow/Eyelet/Elle/Burial Etiquette – Cube - Test Press /5 - NM/NM
$20 The Locust – Safety Second, Body Last - Brown Inside Beer /500 - NM/NM
$15 Nails – You Will Never Be One Of Us - Standard Black Vinyl - VG+/VG+
$10 Pageninetynine / Majorityrule – Document #12 - Grey Marbled /540 - VG+/VG+
$60 Prayer For Cleansing – The Rain In Endless Fall - White Vinyl /425 - NM/NM
$20 Primus – Conspiranoid - Grey w/ White Splatter /500 - NM/NM
$20 See You Next Tuesday – Distractions - Baby Blue / Neon Yellow Smash /200 - NM/NM
$20 See You Next Tuesday – Distractions - Clear w/ Neon Yellow/Pink/Coral Splatter /300 - NM/NM
$200 The Severnaya Complex – Discography -Clear w/ Purple , Black & Glow-In-The-Dark Green Splatter /30 - NM/NM
$60 Three 6 Mafia – Most Known Unknown - Black & Silver Streak w/ OBI /500 - NM/NM
$50 - Trenchlung – Hiraeth Collection- Blue Translucent w/ Black Swirl /100 - NM/NM
$90 - The Used – Self Titled - Bone & Ultra Clear Pinwheel w/ Maroon Splatter w/ OBI /500 - NM/NM
2023.06.05 01:40 catlvr2019 This is it
Well ladies and gentlemen, this earth is much too cruel to continue on. I get my feelings hurt by my family, they get mad at me for being sad and rinse and repeat. This has been an ongoing thought for well....ever. Daydreams of me in a coffin, but making sure I get my nails done before. My 3rd floor balcony would never do the trick. I don't like guns. I like pills. I would take some pills and fall asleep and that would be nice. I've just caused too much trouble on this earth. If you're reading this, I'm sorry if I've ever caused you pain. I never had anything but pure intentions and love. I love everyone and I hope everyone gets to live their dreams. I love you all!
submitted by catlvr2019 to SuicideWatch [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 01:13 morantinthestreets Can my son get taken away from me because I'm bipolar?
Long story short-ish, last week I had a shitty run in with a racist cop and my son's grandparents found out and are trying to use this as an in to get custody of him. His mom went to jail a few months ago and I got sole custody. Since then, I haven't allowed them to see him because they repeatedly defended his mom after it was proven she'd had sex with multiple teenage boys. I don't want him around those kind of people.
They found out about my interaction with the cops through another family member and their thinking is that they can use this to build a case against me. I was innocent in the incident but handcuffed in front of my son and his grandparents are now saying that because I'm black, I'm going to end up getting killed in front of him or at the very least imprisoned. I think it's a bullshit take from a rich, white family but then again them being white and having money could mean things would go their way if we actually end up in court over this.
That's where the bipolar part comes in. I was diagnosed when I was 19 and have kept it mostly under control with medication but I had an episode of hypomania recently where I checked myself into the ER. I'm afraid that this will come up and a judge will say that it's possible I could be unstable and unsafe for my son to be around and this is going to be the nail in the coffin to them being granted custody. Am I overthinking all of this? Or do I need to start thinking about getting a lawyer? I cannot lose him.
Edited to add I wasn't actually placed under arrest. I was handcuffed then told to get back in my car after the cops searched it and found nothing
submitted by morantinthestreets to TooAfraidToAsk [link] [comments]
They found out about my interaction with the cops through another family member and their thinking is that they can use this to build a case against me. I was innocent in the incident but handcuffed in front of my son and his grandparents are now saying that because I'm black, I'm going to end up getting killed in front of him or at the very least imprisoned. I think it's a bullshit take from a rich, white family but then again them being white and having money could mean things would go their way if we actually end up in court over this.
That's where the bipolar part comes in. I was diagnosed when I was 19 and have kept it mostly under control with medication but I had an episode of hypomania recently where I checked myself into the ER. I'm afraid that this will come up and a judge will say that it's possible I could be unstable and unsafe for my son to be around and this is going to be the nail in the coffin to them being granted custody. Am I overthinking all of this? Or do I need to start thinking about getting a lawyer? I cannot lose him.
Edited to add I wasn't actually placed under arrest. I was handcuffed then told to get back in my car after the cops searched it and found nothing
2023.06.05 00:56 cvdx6uhcdfd Angry Britain's Got Talent viewers say Viggo Venn winner is 'nail in coffin' as they promise boycott
 | submitted by cvdx6uhcdfd to u/cvdx6uhcdfd [link] [comments] |
2023.06.05 00:30 Trash_Tia Camp Redwood are running out of counselors! These children ARE NOT CHILDREN. Update: our counsellors are not who they say they are.
Welcome to Camp Redwood! The feel-good camp for ALL AGES.
We toast marshmallows around the fire, tell spooky ghost stories, and hide in random secret military bunkers under the campgrounds! Because SOMETHING IS HERE WITH US.
Camp Redwood is the PERFECT PLACE for a summer getaway where we start EVERY DAY with a CAMP REDWOOD SMILE. Where our counselors disappear every five minutes, and our campers disembowel us for funsies! Did I forget to mention our littles aren’t actually eight years old, but fully grown adults?
We hope you enjoy your fucking stay!
We are also not responsible for any counselors revealing they are not who they said they are—and not who they appear to be.
...
So. There’s a LOT to tell you and not a lot of time to tell it.
Right now, I suppose you could say we are under lockdown—if that is the word. I want to go over the last several days to get you up to date. That’s all I can do right now. I can hope and pray the thing with Teddy’s voice does not get in here, and once again cry out for help—that I know is not coming. Not from the authorities, at least. But hey, if any of you fancy coming to rescue us, we’re in the middle of the Canadian wilderness. The closest rest-stop is maybe three fucking hours away. So have fun. Has it really almost been a week since I posted? Well, we’re still here!
And surprise, surprise, help is not coming. So, please excuse the salt. I am seventeen years old and I have been abandoned by the adults who were supposed to be looking after us.
Who were supposed to act under protocol if something like this happened. I know they were waiting for it—there are specific fucking guidelines on an emergency evacuation for counselors if this ever happened. But then the little shits took over before we could do anything. I guess I’ll start by letting you know that there are two of us left. (three, if we count Rowan, but I’m not). What I thought was going to be a quiet summer getaway with kids my age has turned into a nightmare.
For one, we have been cornered inside the head counselor’s underground secret bunker. If you want to know why she has a secret military bunker, I guess you should keep reading.
Because shit gets weirder than animal crackers having the power to turn adults into kids, and vice versa. When I made my first post, I thought that was it for us. I thought for sure there must have been a self-destruct somewhere—which meant whoever was running this camp was waiting for something like this. I was sure we were going to die, so after making the post, I have to admit with ya’ll—I just slept. I curled up, tried to ignore Harry and Carmel calling our names through childish laugher, and went to sleep with the thought in my head that I was completely at peace with what I had done with my life.
Sure, I was young. Seventeen years old is too young to be ripped apart by littles who are in fact grown adults. But as I was falling into slumber and allowing myself to fall, with my head resting in my lap, my head turned towards a separate pile of files on the other side of the room—I realized I really wanted to know how this was possible. There was so much I needed to know. Why did eight-year-old Eleanor Summers have a file where here birthday dated back to 1979? Why had supposedly innocent sugary snacks turned our adorable littles into mini psychopaths?
These kids were not kids, somehow. But how? How was that even possible? Could it be that the files were wrong?
1979 was definitely 45.
But Eleanor Summers couldn’t be 45 years old. I knew what 45 looked like. I knew that they thought like. They spent half of their time on Facebook laughing at outdated memes, and the other half… I don’t know, working? They have job’s! They’re happily married with kids, maybe soon grandkids! That was not Eleanor Summers. Because Eleanor Summers was most definitely eight years old. I had played several rounds of teddy-bears picnic, and spent hours reassuring her that Harry's ghost stories were in fact not real, enough times for me to know that this little kid was little—and a kid.
But something was bothering me. More than the secret military bunker, and magic age-regressing animal crackers. When I first signed up to Camp Redwood, one of the tag-lines to gain attraction had been, “Solve mysteries in the woods in the dead of night, with nothing but a flashlight and your fellow campers!” I had no idea I would be solving this thing on my own, trapped inside a bunker.
“What are you doing?” Rowan, who was still looking through Allison’s dinosaur laptop, turned to me with half lidded eyes, when I slowly got to my feet, careful not to make too much noise, and crept over to the pile of separate files which seemed to be crumbling apart from age. He kept his voice low, but it sounded almost like a whine. He could have been scared, but from the way he was sitting, cross-legged with a frowny face, I figured something must have been going on with him. The guy looked tired. More tired than normal.
The bags under his eyes were practically shadowing his face, and were an odd contrast to unusually ashy colored cheeks and slightly dilated eyes. Still though, Rowan refused to look vulnerable. I caught glimpse of Harry’s raybans sitting on his head, pinning back thick dark brown curls from falling in front of sleepy eyes. Maybe he was finally losing his cool and breaking out of the well-constructed façade he had been hiding behind since Teddy disappeared.
We had just narrowly escaped a crowd of psycho littles high on age-regressing sugary snacks who were doing who-the-fuck knows to the other counselors who had been captured, so I didn’t blame him looking like that. I guess he couldn’t look me in the eye, because in Rowan’s mind, he was the reason why this happened. He was the leader, and the camp had fallen to psychopathic little eight year olds who had taken half of the counselors hostage, and the other half—most likely taken apart in the physical sense, after what we had witnessed in Cassie’s cabin. Still though, it wasn’t Rowan’s fault. He could sit there and pull a face all he wanted, it’s not like I was going to blow up at him for getting us stuck down here. He actually saved us.
And trapped us, judging from the footsteps upstairs, Carmel and Harry still bouncing around looking for us.
It was a game in their heads. The little’s thought it was cat and mouse. Harry and Carmel were the oblivious cats prowling, while we were the mice, hoping to fucking GOD we weren’t caught and eaten. Ignoring Rowan, I glimpsed what looked like a box full of DVD’S—all of which were labelled with dates and names. I saw familiar ones, my heart racing into my throat. Phoebe. Eli. Cassandra.
Each DVD had one of the kid’s names scribbled on the front, as well as a date.
I found Eleanor’s right at the back of the box.
Eleanor Summers.
08/05/2021. (PM)
Before I could hesitate and think what I was doing, I slid the DVD into the portable player attached to the MacBook. Rowan, to my surprise, didn’t move. But he did make an acknowledging noise when the screen flickered to what looked like video footage. Peering at the screen, I found myself staring at a small white room. There was no door. Only a wooden desk and a chair, and sitting on it was a middle aged woman with dark blonde curls tied into a strict ponytail. She was wearing what looked like a prison jumpsuit.
Her eyes were eerily glued to the camera, unblinking. Her wrists were cuffed in front of her. Though from the look on her face, she saw the restraints as a game. Her eyes lit up with intrigue and I could practically see the cogs in her mind starting to turn as she struggled with them.
As soon as I saw this woman, I felt all of my nerve endings set alight. I wanted to turn the screen off, or look away. But once I was looking at the screen, I couldn’t bring myself to tear my eyes away. “Let’s try this again.” There was a woman offscreen. She sounded young. Too young to be in that kind of authority. I figured there was no way teenagers were being hired as special ops agents, but I guessed I was wrong. She cleared her throat. “It is 4:35 exactly. August 5th 2021. My name is Agent Lemrac,” she stated. “I am asking once again for you to comply with us. As I have said several times, the court are willing to lessen your sentence if you plead guilty with insanity.”
The woman surprised me with a snorting laugh. She seemed to come alive, leaning forward with animated features, her brow reaching her hairline. She was acting like a child, bouncing up and down in the seat, her lips stretching into a wider grin. “What did you just say?”
There was a pause. I could tell the woman was intentionally antagonising the interviewer.
“It means you have been legally declared insane,” the interviewer stumbled over her words slightly. “Mrs Summers, it would be in your best interest to work with us to lessen your current sentence which at the moment is standing at,” the sounds of shuffling paper crackled through the speakers. The interviewer cleared her throat again rustling paper. “Thirty six years. Without parole.”
The woman didn’t speak, only continued to smile—and the interviewer delved further into the sentence. “If you do in fact plead guilty with declared insanity, you will be sentenced to a program which is in the process of supporting and rehabilitating people with your…” she caught herself for a moment. I could tell this interviewer had a biased opinion and it was definitely showing through her interviewing style. I could hear the rapid intakes of her breath as she hurried through what seemed to be a script she was reading from. “Conditions.” She finished. “The Redwood program aims to help people exactly like you.”
Redwood? I thought.
Like… Camp Redwood?
Rowan whistled behind me. I guess I could call that a reaction. The guy was probably still in shock after seeing Café de Teddy splattered all over little Cassie’s cabin floor. I should have known those little bitches weren’t playing Operation for eight hours straight. Turning my attention from Rowan and back to the screen, the woman in the jumpsuit appeared to have changed tactics. Her expression twisted into nonchalance. She leaned back in her chair. “I am not pleading insane because I am not insane.”
“Mrs Summers—”
The woman cut her off. “I am not crazy.” She raised her hands “I am doing what needs to be done.” She leaned forward. “Humanity suffers in the skin. We age and die— and how is that fair? What if we want to see the next millennium? And the next two millennia after that? Why should our bodies dictate our lifespan? Why should we sit here and wait to rot and wither and die when we have the intelligence and mindset to do it? If nobody else is willing to throw ethics aside to take a step forwards in human evolution, I should do it myself.” She folded her arms across her chest, again, like a child. “I did what was to be done.”
“Dr. Summers.” The interviewer’s tone grew stiff. “You and your colleagues conducted illegal and unethical procedures on your family and friends—as well as four other victims.”
The woman inclined her head. “You have a daughter, am I correct? I have a son.”
“A child you killed, Dr Summers.” The interviewer retorted in a hiss which was definitely expressing emotion. She ignored the mention of her daughter, but I could tell it had rattled her to her core. Her voice had cracked. This case was close to her.
That was obvious. Without seeing the interviewer herself, I could sense how uncomfortable she was, shuffling in the chair. Every so often I would hear the sound of her rubbing her hands on her knees and tapping her shoe against the chair leg. She oozed anxiety, not just from her tone of voice, but the way the frame seemed to move with her. “Dr. Summers, you used your son in your research, along with several of his friends. This was not science.” Her voice shook. I heard her sharp inhale. Unprofessional, but very human. Instead of staying stoic and keeping to script, this agent was cracking apart. “It was murder.”
“Agent Lemrac, concentrate on the interview only.” An official voice crackled through what sounded like an intercom on screen.
“Got it.” She spoke through her teeth.
The woman was finding wounds and pressing on them. She was scanning the interviewer for vulnerabilities and preying on every insecurity. She leaned back speaking through a sigh. “Without my son’s sacrifice we wouldn’t have created an answer to death. To growing old and dying, and leaving loved ones behind.” Her voice softened into a murmur, but I didn’t trust it.
After identifying the shattering pieces of this interviewer which were very clear visible in her view, the woman was taking advantage.
“Agent Lemrac, you have a daughter. Am I correct in saying her name is Mari?
“That… that is not relevant.”
“Glioblastoma.” Dr. Summers lips curved into a sickening smile hidden behind mocking sympathy. “A sickness of the brain--which, unfortunately, I cannot fix. If your daughter’s brain was in my hands, I would try. However, not even a brand new body would help her. One which would never age or grow sick. And for that, I am deeply, deeply sorry.” She reached her cuffed hands forwards. “My condolences, Agent Lemrac. Honestly. I have to hand it to you. You are incredibly brave for coming here today and talking to me while abandoning your sick child.” She shook her head.
“Your daughter is dying of an incurable illness, suffering inside fragile skin which will break and fall apart and be unable to keep her standing for much longer. While my son will live on forever. He will see every millennia, a planet which will crumble and build itself back together. And maybe the end of the universe itself.” There was a twitch in her expression and a glitter in her eye I did not recognise. Insanity.
She was fucking insane. I was seeing the pure of it, the depraved and disgusting gleam in eyes empty of remorse and regret. This woman did not care what she had done. I could tell from the look on her face. If she had the chance, she would do this again.
But there was no way they were trying to say her cruelty and complete disregard for her son’s life was due to insanity.
“You are sick, Dr. Summers.” The interviewer said after a moment of gathering herself.
The woman shook her head with a chuckle. “I told you. I am not sick--”
“Sick in the head!” The interviewer’s voice exploded through the speakers in a shriek—a terrified cry she had been trying to hold in. I finally saw her—or at least the back of her. She was a young woman with light blonde hair falling loose on her shoulders. She was trembling. Slamming her hands down on the table, she screamed at the orange jumpsuit woman.
“You are psychologically fucked in the head! You psycho bitch! That is my sister!” She spoke through strangled sobs rattling her whole body. “Mari is my little sister. She is not my child.”
Her breaths were strangled and harboured. I noticed figures looming in the background, but she was continuing. “You killed your own fucking son,” she spat. “You are not legally insane, you are sick!” she shrieked. “You planned and put this together! You sit there and you talk about your son like he’s a… like he’s a tool! You deserve to rot. Do you hear me?” I noticed the orange jumpsuit woman was still smiling, satisfied with the interview’s reaction. Her words were spoken in a vicious poison as she leaned forward and spat directly in orange jumpsuit’s face.
“Agent Lemrac!” Whoever her superiors were—were panicking. “I told you not to turn it off. I knew this was going to happen. Can we stop the demonstration, please? Human emotions present inside an Aceville soldier are too powerful—"
Voices were murmuring in the background, and Agent Lemrac raised her hands. “I want to stop.” She choked out, her hands trembling. She spoke like she still had control over the situation and wasn’t being apprehended. “I want to stop. Do you hear me?” The interviewer was crying, I realized. “Stop the recording! I can’t do this. Oh god, I think I’m going to be sick—”
When the footage ended in a burst of static, I found myself backing away, something slimy creeping its way up my throat.
The woman in the orange jumpsuit who had murdered her son and countless others in what sounded like an attempt at playing god, was Eleanor Summers. I thought back to Teddy’s corpse, and the surgical precision of every organ’s removal. The young interviewer had mentioned colleagues of Eleanor.
Was it possible that Camp Redwood was in fact nothing more than a rehabilitation camp for murderous criminals? There was a loud bang from above, and I was torn from my thoughts.
I turned to Rowan, who had been unusually quiet. And I realized why, when I twisted around to find him three inches from my face, his laboured breath tickling my cheek.
The boy jumped back with a chuckle—like me noticing him was some kind of game, before diving back into the chair. I did notice something odd, as my thoughts spiralled. Rowan couldn’t sit still. Slumped in the leather spinning chair, he fingers tapped a rhythm on the armrests while his feet jumped up and down. In the dim light of the bunker, I glimpsed a sheen of sweat glistening on his forehead and the flesh of his neck. He looked to be… feverish—and now that I was looking at him properly, all of my attention on the boy, I noticed small things which seemed… off about him.
For one, he wasn’t coming up with a plan. Rowan always had a plan. Even if he wasn’t completely sure of it, or was completely winging it. This time though, he was strangely quiet. I found my voice when he stuck out his tongue at me. “What are you looking at?”
“Rowan.” I spoke softly, careful not to garner attention from above us where Harry and Carmel were still clamouring around, playing games. “Are you… feeling okay?” I asked, when he turned back to the laptop, manically biting his fingernails.
“I dunnnooooo, Josie! Am I feeeeeeling okaaaaaayyyyy?” He surprised me with an uncharacteristic laugh.
But I did know it.
I knew it from earlier when he reacted to Allison’s bunker and I had been too freaked out to realize that I was dragging along the enemy with me.
Because the fucking idiot had consumed animal crackers. I had seen him for myself earlier, pouring a pack into his mouth for a snack. Which meant either the ‘kids’ had intentionally dosed him with mind altering sugary snacks, or the more likely, he could not resist those preservatives which was the equivalent of caffeine. It’s not like I could blame him when he harboured the weight of an entire camp, but come on, did he really have to sacrifice his own fucking mind to keep himself awake?
Rowan wasn’t just biting. His nails. He was gnawing. Which he previously thought was a filthy habit. He had yelled at a camper for chewing on her nails a few days earlier.
Now that I was noticing it, I couldn’t… stop noticing it. The boy’s whole demeanour had changed; the way he was sinking into the chair, instead of sitting up straight like usual—- I used to call it having a stick up his ass. The boy started typing on the laptop, ignoring me. But when I watched the pattern of his fingers, he was just typing gibberish. Footsteps pounded above us, Harry and Carmel acting as the kid’s’ brainwashed foot-soldiers. Or, more likely somehow, if the animal crackers had caused the littles, or I guess, the fully grown forty year old criminals, to relapse in age-- then maybe it was possible for the same thing to happen to us. To Rowan.
I could feel myself starting to back away, but there was nowhere to run. I just slammed into a cupboard. My gaze flicked to Rowan again, who was tapping a beat on the laptop tracking pad, swaying back and forth, his eyes elsewhere before his gaze found mine. “Marcoooooo!” Harry shouted from above, giggling with Carmel.
I had to guess their mental age had to be at least 8-10 years old. Which meant I wasn’t just dealing with a camp full of forty-year-old psycho’s, I was also dealing with mentally relapsed counselors acting like toddlers.
Rowan seemed to jolt in the chair, twisting his head around, his eyes suddenly incredibly childlike and playful, and very Un-Rowan, were finding the ceiling, his mouth stretching into a smile, like he was seeing butterflies. His eyes flashed to me, and I caught a twitch in his lip. I knew that look. It was the look on my seven year old sister, who knew mom was mad at me, and wanted to make it even worse.
His cheeks were starting to blossom scarlet from what must have been the overwhelming urge to laugh. Rowan pressed his lips together and held in a breath like a hamster, and the asshole was fucking with me. Waiting for me to beat him to it by accident. Kids were fucking ruthless, but there was something terrifying about an 18 year old with a little kid’s mind.
I lifted my index to my lips, miming for him not to even try, but the boy just mimicked me, bugging out his eyes and pressing his finger to his grinning mouth. “Don’t you fucking dare.” I managed to whisper. The boy was definitely playing his own game, moving in twitching movements, baiting me. When he cupped his mouth, I almost let out a cry, but then he dropped his arms with a giggle, as if to say, “I’m just kidding!”
Slowly, I turned around, grabbed the salt I’d found in Allison’s cupboard, and a flat can of soda. Without making too much movement, I poured a handful of salt into the can. But Rowan seemed to know exactly what I was doing. Because in the time it was taking me to advance towards him with the can of salty soda, one arm shakily ready to grab hold of him, and put him into a headlock, he was cupping his mouth, all logic and everything adult, everything he had been as our leader, igniting in playful eyes, leaving me the last one standing.
“Pollloooooo!”
By the time Rowan had managed to reveal our hiding place in a spluttered laugh, I had hold of the squirming boy, one arm wrapped around his neck, my other forcing the can of soda into his mouth. I had definitely miscalculated his strength. During camp Redwood activities, he was always the last one to come back from the trail, holding his knees and panting. I figured he was unfit. However, I was wrong. Underneath his shirt, the guy had some serious muscles.
It was like attacking a brick wall. However, Rowan was mentally a kid. So, I had my intelligence and logic on my side. When it became obvious I wasn’t going to get anywhere with brute strength, I resorted to tickling him, which made him squirm, squeaking out a laugh. When he opened his mouth to yell at me to stop, I took my chance, thrusting the can into his lips and holding his nose so he swallowed it down.
“No!” His laughter turned into muffled yelling, as he batted his fists at my chest. “No, no, no! Get off, get off!”
His body convulsed as the salt did its job, causing the boy to lurch to his knees and choke up forbidden animal crackers in a gooish sludge which turned my stomach. By the time Rowan seemed half himself and half not, still kneeling, his head pressed against the floor, Harry was poking his head through the door with a goonish grin. “Found you!” He giggled, before forcing the door open, allowing Carmel and Callen, freshly caught and mentally turned into littles, to advance down the stairs with equally terrifying grins. There was something wrong with Harry’s face, and I only realized it when the guy himself was hauling me from the bunker, Carmel dragging a barely responsive Rowan. There was nothing in Harry’s expression, only blind childish excitement at winning the game. When he dragged me out of Allison’s cabin and threw me to the ground, I realized he too had insane strength I had not been expecting. But that thought quickly retracted when I was seeing his face in the light of a crescent moon lighting up the sky an eerie glow. Harry’s cheeks were puffy and swollen, his right eye way bigger than it should have been.
When he spoke, his voice was more of a lisp. This was something far more realistic than magical animal crackers fucking with his brain.
“He needs help!” I managed to choke out when Carmel wrapped jump-rope around my wrists. Next to me, Rowan was refusing to get up, still choking up salty soda, groaning into his hands. Every time Callen tried to restrain him, he hissed out like an animal.
“Do you hear me?!” I struggled violently. “Harry needs—”
BANG.
Is what it felt like. The feeling of something—what felt and sounded like a toy car—colliding with my temples, sent me onto the ground, my head spinning itself off of its axis. I remember lying on my back and frowning at the moon which almost looked like it was getting closer to me, blurring into a white ball of light—before reality sunk in, and it was in fact Carmel’s converse coming down to finish me off. I didn’t stay knocked out for long. But I did dream.
I think you can call it a dream? I was lying in bed at home; my room drowned in the dark. I was cosy, curled up in my blankets, when a clammy hand slammed over my mouth, rousing me from slumber. There were two figures in my room. They didn’t have faces. They just existed as shadows, silhouettes. Before one of them raised something above their head, and… impact.
It was the same impact as the toy car hitting me, snapping me back to that night. It wasn’t a dream. Because I remembered his clammy fingers over my mouth, and his hisses for me to shut up as he dragged me from my room.
My parents stood in front of me with expressions of sympathy. Basked in warm light, my mom and dad looked almost otherworldly. “For the best.” Was what they mouthed when my own phantom screams slammed into me. I asked them why, and they didn’t reply, allowing him to pull me further and further from what I knew, from my life as I knew it. But.. that couldn’t be real. I had memories of getting on the bus to camp Redwood. I could recall the whole journey. So, why… why was my tangled mind saying otherwise?
When I gathered myself, the first thing I realized was I was sitting down. I was outside, cool night air grazing my bare arms. There was something attached to me, jerking violently, And it took me several disorienting blinks to understand that I was tied back to back with Rowan. My head pounded, and something wet and warm dripped down my temple. Great. I could add head injury to the long list of things to worry about.
“Let me go you little fucking witch.”
Rowan was back to himself, though from the muffled hissing and the sound of choking—I had to guess he was being force-fed animal crackers.
“Let me—mpphmmm. little…. fucking… mphmmphhmhppmm!”
“Rowan.” I managed to get out in a croak. Through flickering eyes, I caught glimpse of a familiar figure dancing around us. Shivers rocketed down my spine, and I wrenched at the jump-rope restraints, but they did a surprisingly job of restraining my arms behind my back.
Eleanor was with Rowan, while Eli was knelt in front of me. Looking at him, the boy had definitely aged in the face—and I couldn’t help wondering what exactly he had done as a forty something year old to be sent to this place.
“Josie!” Rowan responded in a wail. “Josie. Wake the FUCK up.”
“Stop swearing.”
Eleanor spoke with the cold tone of her actual age.
“Oh, yeah?” Rowan spluttered. “Fuck you.” The boy’s laugh was still rough from almost vomiting his insides out from too much salt intake. “I’m sorry, you were a fucking boomer all along?!” He wriggled in the restraints, lunging forwards, which sent me backwards.
“Stop swearing, Rowan.” Was all the girl responded with calmly.
“Like I’m going to listen to you!” He sneered. “Fuck, fuck, fuckity, fucking fuck!” What are you going to do, huh? Bite me with your false teeth?” The sound of saliva hitting skin made me wince. He was pissed. I had no doubt his completely rational anger was going to get us killed. Rowan was also somehow getting mixed up between forty and eighty. Though he was unwillingly snacking on mind bending sugary goodness.
“Fudge, Rowan.” Eleanor spoke in a giggle.
“What?!”
“Say fudge. Not fuck.”
“No.”
His hiss of pain caught me off guard. I don’t know what she was doing to him, but it was hurting him.
“You fudging fudge! I’m going to fudging kill you when I get out of these fudging ropes—“ his manic cursing became a muffled yell.
“Say fudge,” Eleanor hummed, followed by his hiss when the palm of her hand skinned his cheek. “Fuck is a bad word. You even said so yourself and you’re my favourite counselor.”
He heaved out a breath.
“You fudge,” Rowan spat. “When I get out of this, I am going to fudging kill you, you fudging—” His manic ranting morphed, once again, into muffled yelling, after another fistful of animal crackers were forced into his mouth. When I risked twisting around, I could see his rebellion slowly starting to simmer out as he relaxed slightly. I wanted to yell at him to keep a clear head before cold fingers were dipping under my chin and forcing my head around where I found myself face to face with Eli.
“I like you, Josie,” he said, before untying me and pulling me to my feet. Now at the age of nine or ten, he was a lot stronger. When I tried to pull away, the cruel blade of a knife grazed my gut. I caught his grin. “But we don’t need you.” Eli pointed to Rowan.
“We just want them.”
I followed his pointer finger which went from Rowan to Harry and Carmel, who were just standing there like fucking idiots, probably awaiting the next game. Harry’s face was getting redder. It looked like he was suffocating, and yet his grin was growing wider and wider, splitting his lips apart. “Rowan Atlas.” Eleanor said, dragging him to his feet. Something was stapled to his forehead head, which caused him to howl in pain, hissing another strangled line of “Fudge”. but I couldn’t read what it was.
“Camp leader. Intelligent, and problem solving skills.”
“Harry Carlisle.” Eli nodded his head with a smile. “Quick thinker. Strong minded.”
“Carmel Locke.” Cassie spoke behind me. She had her arms folded, a wry smile on her lips. “Smarter than she makes out—- an independent learner, and can work well under pressure.”
Looking at these kids, I felt sick to my stomach. They were planning something—and had the intelligence of renowned scientists, which was what I gathered from the footage on the MacBook. “What?” was all I could hiss out, as Eli prodded the blade of the knife into my back, ushering me to walk. “What are you talking about?”
“Duh.” He spoke in a more tweeny giggle. “Like I said, Miss Josie. You’re my favorite counselor but we don’t need you, so I’m going to use you for parts.” He laughed when a shiver spiderwebbed down my spine. “See! I told you I was going to show you my collection!”
“But… what do you need them for?”
Eli pressed his index finger to his lips with a laugh before forcing me to face forwards. “That’s a secret!”
When I didn’t, or couldn’t move, he shoved me into a stumbling power-walk, and I managed to turn my head quickly, making feverish eye contact with Rowan.
“Rowan.” I said calmly through the gutter in my throat. “Get…. Get help.”
If I was going to die, I needed him to get a hold of himself and somehow alert the outside world what was going on.
“From whom, Josie?!” He wailed back—and as I was dragged away, I could once again sense the childish undertones in his voice.
I had no choice but to obey Eli’s orders. If I didn’t want a knife in my back. He took me to the main lunch cabin, which, when I set foot inside, almost sent me to my knees.
Something lurched inside me, and I was screaming with no voice, staggering backwards, only to be shoved onto my face. In front of me was what had been the lunch hall, fully converted into the beginning of a laboratory.
What had been cafeteria tables were fashioned into makeshift gurney’s and beds, and I was looking at all of the missing counselors. Yuri and Noah had been skinned completely, their faces laid out on a makeshift surgical table. Joey had been ripped open, his heart and brain removed, a glittering metallic substance creeping its way across his forehead. It was then when I remembered Eleanor Summers words.
She wanted to prevent death and preserve the human mind. Looking at what was in front of me, this was the start of it. There was equipment I had never seen before. Lily’s body was empty, carved out completely, tubes forced inside her. When I glimpsed her fingers move and begin to ball into a fist, I saw red. I saw fucking red. The exit was so close and yet Eli, fucking Eli, wielded his knife. I think that is when part of me gave up. My brain just stopped. It short circuited. Seeing my friends murdered and yet somehow being kept alive through playing god, my body slumped to the ground. I was numb. Completely numb.
I’m not sure what would have happened if those bloody saws and instruments which had been used on my friends were used on me too.
Luckily, that did not happen. Before Eli could get his slimy hands on me, he crumpled to the ground in an almost cartoon-like fashion, and standing over me was Harry. Who was looking better. When he grasped hold of me and helped me up, I only had one word. “Out.” And he was nodding, his eyes glistening as he drunk in our friends’ fate.
“How?” I managed to sputter out, when we made it out of the cabin, ducking behind a tree. Harry turned to me, motioning for me to shut up. There was a group of now ten to eleven year olds already running around, searching for what I guessed was him.
“I’m allergic to peanut butter,” Harry murmured, his grasp tightening on my wrist as he led me across the camp, the two of us stumbling.
“What, and you just magically healed?”
He didn’t respond to that, which bothered me.
“The bunker is our best shot,” I hissed out. “I think we can get in contact with someone down there.” I paused, unable to stop myself. “What makes you so important?”
“Dunno. Maybe I’m their favorite.”
When we found Allison’s cabin, which was more of a safehouse (an exposed safehouse) I found Rowan sitting on the wooden porch with his legs swinging over the side. “Rowan!” Harry groaned. I found it hard to believe their roles had been switched. Now he was the one yelling at the camp-leader. “I told you to stay inside!”
He ushered the boy inside, before barricading the door with some hefty looking equipment. I could tell from the grin on his face that our so-called leader was once again no longer himself.
I had to bite back a groan. “You’re kidding.” I said, pointing to Rowan, who buried his head in his knees and blew a raspberry. “Does he look and act like our leader right now?!”
“It’s Rowan, Josie.”
“He’s a liability.”
“He’s our friend! Wouldn’t Rowan do the same?”
Yes, he would. But. He would also realize we’re lost causes.
“Gag him with something.” I said. “If he makes any more noise, we’re dumping him.”
“He’s a kid!”
“Just the mind of one.”
I don’t know how animal crackers worked, but his age seemed to be progressively younger. This time he just sat with wide eyes watching us.
Harry almost tore apart the place looking for means of communication, before an old fashioned ringing sound made me jump.
“What was that?” Harry turned to me with his lip curled.
“How am I supposed to know?!” I hissed. “Keep looking!” But when I ducked under the table, my hands crawled under the desk, finding a wire—and attached to that, an ancient looking phone which looked straight out of a 1940’s movie, a bright green rotary phone.
Hesitantly, I answered it, lifting the phone to my ear. “Hello?”
“Did you awaken the subjects, Agent Salta?"
The voice on the other end was a woman, an oldish sounding woman with the tinge of a British accent.
“What?” I shot a look at Harry before shaking my head. “No. My name is Josie Greenfield. We’re at Camp Redwood, and we need help.”
The woman paused.
“Where is Agent Salta?” She cleared her throat. “This line is reserved for communication with agents only.”
“I don’t know who the fuck you’re talking about!" I squeaked out. “My name is Josie, and whatever is happening here, we need help!”
“Josie. Did you awaken the subjects?”
I paused after a moment, shooting Harry a look when he tried to take the phone off of me. “Yes.”
“And… are our agents unavailable?”
“I don’t understand.”
“When a health and safety breach is activated, our agents are awakened to deal with the Project Spearhead subjects if they were to ever go rogue, or become conscious enough to think. Josie, can you tell me what is in front of you? Describe it to me.”
I held my breath. Next to the hidden phone under the desk was what looked like mismatched wires, all of which had been severed. I lowered myself slowly, poking at mess. “Wires. I see… cut up wires.” I whispered. “Does this mean they know about you?”
She hummed. “Ah…That makes sense. The only way to activate our sleeper handlers would be to send out the signal. You appear to have been sabotaged. Unless activated manually, our agents cannot help you. I am sorry. They are your problem now.” The woman paused.
“If I were you, I would hope and pray they have not sabotaged the self-destruct. If you find that, then you may be able to save yourselves and find peace.” She cleared her throat. “Thank you for your service, Josie Greenfield.”
“Wait.” I managed to get out. “Wait, no! You can’t just… you can’t leave us! We need help!”
I found myself yelling at nothing when the phone went dead. The dull tone of the dead ringtone was clanging in my ears before footsteps from up above. “Fuck this.” Harry picked up a lead pipe. “They’re still little kids, right? I mean, their head must still be partly kids—- so let’s fucking beat their heads in.”
He noticed something, then, starting forwards towards the mess of files I had left earlier. Harry knelt on the ground and picked up Eli’s file, his eyes wide. But he wasn’t staring at the dates confirming the little boy’s age.
Instead, Harry pointed at the bottom of the file. “I don’t want to freak you out, Josie,” he whispered. Initially, I didn’t know what he was trying to show before I glimpsed notes scrawled at the bottom of the file, followed by a signature. “But I’m pretty sure that is my fucking writing.”
Harry was right.
I pulled the paperwork off of him, flicking through each file before turning my eyes to him. “Who the fuck are you?”
A clanging sound from above broke the tension, and whatever Harry was about to reply with was strangled in his throat. He slammed a hand over his mouth.
“Guys?”
The voice twisted me up inside, threatening to release a shriek from my mouth I had managed to clamp shut.
Teddy.
“Are you down here?” His voice was strained, and had an odd tone to it. “I can’t… I can’t see you.”
…
Can someone please tell me what the fuck is going on?! It’s been a blur of a week. We’ve managed to stay down here, surviving off of Allison’s rations. Rowan isn’t getting any better. He seems to have stopped mentally de-ageing at the age of maybe six. Harry has spent the last few days trying to get in contact with anyone, but it’s like they are IGNORING US.
I’ve been looking through everything I can find on Project Spearhead, but nothing points to Harry being involved. So. How is his signature all over the files? How is it possible that two friends I thought I knew several days ago, are now complete strangers?
Teddy keeps coming back.
He’s crying out to us.
I think he’s… in pain.
My god, I can’t stand this anymore. Please. CAMP REDWOOD NEEDS HELP.
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We toast marshmallows around the fire, tell spooky ghost stories, and hide in random secret military bunkers under the campgrounds! Because SOMETHING IS HERE WITH US.
Camp Redwood is the PERFECT PLACE for a summer getaway where we start EVERY DAY with a CAMP REDWOOD SMILE. Where our counselors disappear every five minutes, and our campers disembowel us for funsies! Did I forget to mention our littles aren’t actually eight years old, but fully grown adults?
We hope you enjoy your fucking stay!
We are also not responsible for any counselors revealing they are not who they said they are—and not who they appear to be.
...
So. There’s a LOT to tell you and not a lot of time to tell it.
Right now, I suppose you could say we are under lockdown—if that is the word. I want to go over the last several days to get you up to date. That’s all I can do right now. I can hope and pray the thing with Teddy’s voice does not get in here, and once again cry out for help—that I know is not coming. Not from the authorities, at least. But hey, if any of you fancy coming to rescue us, we’re in the middle of the Canadian wilderness. The closest rest-stop is maybe three fucking hours away. So have fun. Has it really almost been a week since I posted? Well, we’re still here!
And surprise, surprise, help is not coming. So, please excuse the salt. I am seventeen years old and I have been abandoned by the adults who were supposed to be looking after us.
Who were supposed to act under protocol if something like this happened. I know they were waiting for it—there are specific fucking guidelines on an emergency evacuation for counselors if this ever happened. But then the little shits took over before we could do anything. I guess I’ll start by letting you know that there are two of us left. (three, if we count Rowan, but I’m not). What I thought was going to be a quiet summer getaway with kids my age has turned into a nightmare.
For one, we have been cornered inside the head counselor’s underground secret bunker. If you want to know why she has a secret military bunker, I guess you should keep reading.
Because shit gets weirder than animal crackers having the power to turn adults into kids, and vice versa. When I made my first post, I thought that was it for us. I thought for sure there must have been a self-destruct somewhere—which meant whoever was running this camp was waiting for something like this. I was sure we were going to die, so after making the post, I have to admit with ya’ll—I just slept. I curled up, tried to ignore Harry and Carmel calling our names through childish laugher, and went to sleep with the thought in my head that I was completely at peace with what I had done with my life.
Sure, I was young. Seventeen years old is too young to be ripped apart by littles who are in fact grown adults. But as I was falling into slumber and allowing myself to fall, with my head resting in my lap, my head turned towards a separate pile of files on the other side of the room—I realized I really wanted to know how this was possible. There was so much I needed to know. Why did eight-year-old Eleanor Summers have a file where here birthday dated back to 1979? Why had supposedly innocent sugary snacks turned our adorable littles into mini psychopaths?
These kids were not kids, somehow. But how? How was that even possible? Could it be that the files were wrong?
1979 was definitely 45.
But Eleanor Summers couldn’t be 45 years old. I knew what 45 looked like. I knew that they thought like. They spent half of their time on Facebook laughing at outdated memes, and the other half… I don’t know, working? They have job’s! They’re happily married with kids, maybe soon grandkids! That was not Eleanor Summers. Because Eleanor Summers was most definitely eight years old. I had played several rounds of teddy-bears picnic, and spent hours reassuring her that Harry's ghost stories were in fact not real, enough times for me to know that this little kid was little—and a kid.
But something was bothering me. More than the secret military bunker, and magic age-regressing animal crackers. When I first signed up to Camp Redwood, one of the tag-lines to gain attraction had been, “Solve mysteries in the woods in the dead of night, with nothing but a flashlight and your fellow campers!” I had no idea I would be solving this thing on my own, trapped inside a bunker.
“What are you doing?” Rowan, who was still looking through Allison’s dinosaur laptop, turned to me with half lidded eyes, when I slowly got to my feet, careful not to make too much noise, and crept over to the pile of separate files which seemed to be crumbling apart from age. He kept his voice low, but it sounded almost like a whine. He could have been scared, but from the way he was sitting, cross-legged with a frowny face, I figured something must have been going on with him. The guy looked tired. More tired than normal.
The bags under his eyes were practically shadowing his face, and were an odd contrast to unusually ashy colored cheeks and slightly dilated eyes. Still though, Rowan refused to look vulnerable. I caught glimpse of Harry’s raybans sitting on his head, pinning back thick dark brown curls from falling in front of sleepy eyes. Maybe he was finally losing his cool and breaking out of the well-constructed façade he had been hiding behind since Teddy disappeared.
We had just narrowly escaped a crowd of psycho littles high on age-regressing sugary snacks who were doing who-the-fuck knows to the other counselors who had been captured, so I didn’t blame him looking like that. I guess he couldn’t look me in the eye, because in Rowan’s mind, he was the reason why this happened. He was the leader, and the camp had fallen to psychopathic little eight year olds who had taken half of the counselors hostage, and the other half—most likely taken apart in the physical sense, after what we had witnessed in Cassie’s cabin. Still though, it wasn’t Rowan’s fault. He could sit there and pull a face all he wanted, it’s not like I was going to blow up at him for getting us stuck down here. He actually saved us.
And trapped us, judging from the footsteps upstairs, Carmel and Harry still bouncing around looking for us.
It was a game in their heads. The little’s thought it was cat and mouse. Harry and Carmel were the oblivious cats prowling, while we were the mice, hoping to fucking GOD we weren’t caught and eaten. Ignoring Rowan, I glimpsed what looked like a box full of DVD’S—all of which were labelled with dates and names. I saw familiar ones, my heart racing into my throat. Phoebe. Eli. Cassandra.
Each DVD had one of the kid’s names scribbled on the front, as well as a date.
I found Eleanor’s right at the back of the box.
Eleanor Summers.
08/05/2021. (PM)
Before I could hesitate and think what I was doing, I slid the DVD into the portable player attached to the MacBook. Rowan, to my surprise, didn’t move. But he did make an acknowledging noise when the screen flickered to what looked like video footage. Peering at the screen, I found myself staring at a small white room. There was no door. Only a wooden desk and a chair, and sitting on it was a middle aged woman with dark blonde curls tied into a strict ponytail. She was wearing what looked like a prison jumpsuit.
Her eyes were eerily glued to the camera, unblinking. Her wrists were cuffed in front of her. Though from the look on her face, she saw the restraints as a game. Her eyes lit up with intrigue and I could practically see the cogs in her mind starting to turn as she struggled with them.
As soon as I saw this woman, I felt all of my nerve endings set alight. I wanted to turn the screen off, or look away. But once I was looking at the screen, I couldn’t bring myself to tear my eyes away. “Let’s try this again.” There was a woman offscreen. She sounded young. Too young to be in that kind of authority. I figured there was no way teenagers were being hired as special ops agents, but I guessed I was wrong. She cleared her throat. “It is 4:35 exactly. August 5th 2021. My name is Agent Lemrac,” she stated. “I am asking once again for you to comply with us. As I have said several times, the court are willing to lessen your sentence if you plead guilty with insanity.”
The woman surprised me with a snorting laugh. She seemed to come alive, leaning forward with animated features, her brow reaching her hairline. She was acting like a child, bouncing up and down in the seat, her lips stretching into a wider grin. “What did you just say?”
There was a pause. I could tell the woman was intentionally antagonising the interviewer.
“It means you have been legally declared insane,” the interviewer stumbled over her words slightly. “Mrs Summers, it would be in your best interest to work with us to lessen your current sentence which at the moment is standing at,” the sounds of shuffling paper crackled through the speakers. The interviewer cleared her throat again rustling paper. “Thirty six years. Without parole.”
The woman didn’t speak, only continued to smile—and the interviewer delved further into the sentence. “If you do in fact plead guilty with declared insanity, you will be sentenced to a program which is in the process of supporting and rehabilitating people with your…” she caught herself for a moment. I could tell this interviewer had a biased opinion and it was definitely showing through her interviewing style. I could hear the rapid intakes of her breath as she hurried through what seemed to be a script she was reading from. “Conditions.” She finished. “The Redwood program aims to help people exactly like you.”
Redwood? I thought.
Like… Camp Redwood?
Rowan whistled behind me. I guess I could call that a reaction. The guy was probably still in shock after seeing Café de Teddy splattered all over little Cassie’s cabin floor. I should have known those little bitches weren’t playing Operation for eight hours straight. Turning my attention from Rowan and back to the screen, the woman in the jumpsuit appeared to have changed tactics. Her expression twisted into nonchalance. She leaned back in her chair. “I am not pleading insane because I am not insane.”
“Mrs Summers—”
The woman cut her off. “I am not crazy.” She raised her hands “I am doing what needs to be done.” She leaned forward. “Humanity suffers in the skin. We age and die— and how is that fair? What if we want to see the next millennium? And the next two millennia after that? Why should our bodies dictate our lifespan? Why should we sit here and wait to rot and wither and die when we have the intelligence and mindset to do it? If nobody else is willing to throw ethics aside to take a step forwards in human evolution, I should do it myself.” She folded her arms across her chest, again, like a child. “I did what was to be done.”
“Dr. Summers.” The interviewer’s tone grew stiff. “You and your colleagues conducted illegal and unethical procedures on your family and friends—as well as four other victims.”
The woman inclined her head. “You have a daughter, am I correct? I have a son.”
“A child you killed, Dr Summers.” The interviewer retorted in a hiss which was definitely expressing emotion. She ignored the mention of her daughter, but I could tell it had rattled her to her core. Her voice had cracked. This case was close to her.
That was obvious. Without seeing the interviewer herself, I could sense how uncomfortable she was, shuffling in the chair. Every so often I would hear the sound of her rubbing her hands on her knees and tapping her shoe against the chair leg. She oozed anxiety, not just from her tone of voice, but the way the frame seemed to move with her. “Dr. Summers, you used your son in your research, along with several of his friends. This was not science.” Her voice shook. I heard her sharp inhale. Unprofessional, but very human. Instead of staying stoic and keeping to script, this agent was cracking apart. “It was murder.”
“Agent Lemrac, concentrate on the interview only.” An official voice crackled through what sounded like an intercom on screen.
“Got it.” She spoke through her teeth.
The woman was finding wounds and pressing on them. She was scanning the interviewer for vulnerabilities and preying on every insecurity. She leaned back speaking through a sigh. “Without my son’s sacrifice we wouldn’t have created an answer to death. To growing old and dying, and leaving loved ones behind.” Her voice softened into a murmur, but I didn’t trust it.
After identifying the shattering pieces of this interviewer which were very clear visible in her view, the woman was taking advantage.
“Agent Lemrac, you have a daughter. Am I correct in saying her name is Mari?
“That… that is not relevant.”
“Glioblastoma.” Dr. Summers lips curved into a sickening smile hidden behind mocking sympathy. “A sickness of the brain--which, unfortunately, I cannot fix. If your daughter’s brain was in my hands, I would try. However, not even a brand new body would help her. One which would never age or grow sick. And for that, I am deeply, deeply sorry.” She reached her cuffed hands forwards. “My condolences, Agent Lemrac. Honestly. I have to hand it to you. You are incredibly brave for coming here today and talking to me while abandoning your sick child.” She shook her head.
“Your daughter is dying of an incurable illness, suffering inside fragile skin which will break and fall apart and be unable to keep her standing for much longer. While my son will live on forever. He will see every millennia, a planet which will crumble and build itself back together. And maybe the end of the universe itself.” There was a twitch in her expression and a glitter in her eye I did not recognise. Insanity.
She was fucking insane. I was seeing the pure of it, the depraved and disgusting gleam in eyes empty of remorse and regret. This woman did not care what she had done. I could tell from the look on her face. If she had the chance, she would do this again.
But there was no way they were trying to say her cruelty and complete disregard for her son’s life was due to insanity.
“You are sick, Dr. Summers.” The interviewer said after a moment of gathering herself.
The woman shook her head with a chuckle. “I told you. I am not sick--”
“Sick in the head!” The interviewer’s voice exploded through the speakers in a shriek—a terrified cry she had been trying to hold in. I finally saw her—or at least the back of her. She was a young woman with light blonde hair falling loose on her shoulders. She was trembling. Slamming her hands down on the table, she screamed at the orange jumpsuit woman.
“You are psychologically fucked in the head! You psycho bitch! That is my sister!” She spoke through strangled sobs rattling her whole body. “Mari is my little sister. She is not my child.”
Her breaths were strangled and harboured. I noticed figures looming in the background, but she was continuing. “You killed your own fucking son,” she spat. “You are not legally insane, you are sick!” she shrieked. “You planned and put this together! You sit there and you talk about your son like he’s a… like he’s a tool! You deserve to rot. Do you hear me?” I noticed the orange jumpsuit woman was still smiling, satisfied with the interview’s reaction. Her words were spoken in a vicious poison as she leaned forward and spat directly in orange jumpsuit’s face.
“Agent Lemrac!” Whoever her superiors were—were panicking. “I told you not to turn it off. I knew this was going to happen. Can we stop the demonstration, please? Human emotions present inside an Aceville soldier are too powerful—"
Voices were murmuring in the background, and Agent Lemrac raised her hands. “I want to stop.” She choked out, her hands trembling. She spoke like she still had control over the situation and wasn’t being apprehended. “I want to stop. Do you hear me?” The interviewer was crying, I realized. “Stop the recording! I can’t do this. Oh god, I think I’m going to be sick—”
When the footage ended in a burst of static, I found myself backing away, something slimy creeping its way up my throat.
The woman in the orange jumpsuit who had murdered her son and countless others in what sounded like an attempt at playing god, was Eleanor Summers. I thought back to Teddy’s corpse, and the surgical precision of every organ’s removal. The young interviewer had mentioned colleagues of Eleanor.
Was it possible that Camp Redwood was in fact nothing more than a rehabilitation camp for murderous criminals? There was a loud bang from above, and I was torn from my thoughts.
I turned to Rowan, who had been unusually quiet. And I realized why, when I twisted around to find him three inches from my face, his laboured breath tickling my cheek.
The boy jumped back with a chuckle—like me noticing him was some kind of game, before diving back into the chair. I did notice something odd, as my thoughts spiralled. Rowan couldn’t sit still. Slumped in the leather spinning chair, he fingers tapped a rhythm on the armrests while his feet jumped up and down. In the dim light of the bunker, I glimpsed a sheen of sweat glistening on his forehead and the flesh of his neck. He looked to be… feverish—and now that I was looking at him properly, all of my attention on the boy, I noticed small things which seemed… off about him.
For one, he wasn’t coming up with a plan. Rowan always had a plan. Even if he wasn’t completely sure of it, or was completely winging it. This time though, he was strangely quiet. I found my voice when he stuck out his tongue at me. “What are you looking at?”
“Rowan.” I spoke softly, careful not to garner attention from above us where Harry and Carmel were still clamouring around, playing games. “Are you… feeling okay?” I asked, when he turned back to the laptop, manically biting his fingernails.
“I dunnnooooo, Josie! Am I feeeeeeling okaaaaaayyyyy?” He surprised me with an uncharacteristic laugh.
But I did know it.
I knew it from earlier when he reacted to Allison’s bunker and I had been too freaked out to realize that I was dragging along the enemy with me.
Because the fucking idiot had consumed animal crackers. I had seen him for myself earlier, pouring a pack into his mouth for a snack. Which meant either the ‘kids’ had intentionally dosed him with mind altering sugary snacks, or the more likely, he could not resist those preservatives which was the equivalent of caffeine. It’s not like I could blame him when he harboured the weight of an entire camp, but come on, did he really have to sacrifice his own fucking mind to keep himself awake?
Rowan wasn’t just biting. His nails. He was gnawing. Which he previously thought was a filthy habit. He had yelled at a camper for chewing on her nails a few days earlier.
Now that I was noticing it, I couldn’t… stop noticing it. The boy’s whole demeanour had changed; the way he was sinking into the chair, instead of sitting up straight like usual—- I used to call it having a stick up his ass. The boy started typing on the laptop, ignoring me. But when I watched the pattern of his fingers, he was just typing gibberish. Footsteps pounded above us, Harry and Carmel acting as the kid’s’ brainwashed foot-soldiers. Or, more likely somehow, if the animal crackers had caused the littles, or I guess, the fully grown forty year old criminals, to relapse in age-- then maybe it was possible for the same thing to happen to us. To Rowan.
I could feel myself starting to back away, but there was nowhere to run. I just slammed into a cupboard. My gaze flicked to Rowan again, who was tapping a beat on the laptop tracking pad, swaying back and forth, his eyes elsewhere before his gaze found mine. “Marcoooooo!” Harry shouted from above, giggling with Carmel.
I had to guess their mental age had to be at least 8-10 years old. Which meant I wasn’t just dealing with a camp full of forty-year-old psycho’s, I was also dealing with mentally relapsed counselors acting like toddlers.
Rowan seemed to jolt in the chair, twisting his head around, his eyes suddenly incredibly childlike and playful, and very Un-Rowan, were finding the ceiling, his mouth stretching into a smile, like he was seeing butterflies. His eyes flashed to me, and I caught a twitch in his lip. I knew that look. It was the look on my seven year old sister, who knew mom was mad at me, and wanted to make it even worse.
His cheeks were starting to blossom scarlet from what must have been the overwhelming urge to laugh. Rowan pressed his lips together and held in a breath like a hamster, and the asshole was fucking with me. Waiting for me to beat him to it by accident. Kids were fucking ruthless, but there was something terrifying about an 18 year old with a little kid’s mind.
I lifted my index to my lips, miming for him not to even try, but the boy just mimicked me, bugging out his eyes and pressing his finger to his grinning mouth. “Don’t you fucking dare.” I managed to whisper. The boy was definitely playing his own game, moving in twitching movements, baiting me. When he cupped his mouth, I almost let out a cry, but then he dropped his arms with a giggle, as if to say, “I’m just kidding!”
Slowly, I turned around, grabbed the salt I’d found in Allison’s cupboard, and a flat can of soda. Without making too much movement, I poured a handful of salt into the can. But Rowan seemed to know exactly what I was doing. Because in the time it was taking me to advance towards him with the can of salty soda, one arm shakily ready to grab hold of him, and put him into a headlock, he was cupping his mouth, all logic and everything adult, everything he had been as our leader, igniting in playful eyes, leaving me the last one standing.
“Pollloooooo!”
By the time Rowan had managed to reveal our hiding place in a spluttered laugh, I had hold of the squirming boy, one arm wrapped around his neck, my other forcing the can of soda into his mouth. I had definitely miscalculated his strength. During camp Redwood activities, he was always the last one to come back from the trail, holding his knees and panting. I figured he was unfit. However, I was wrong. Underneath his shirt, the guy had some serious muscles.
It was like attacking a brick wall. However, Rowan was mentally a kid. So, I had my intelligence and logic on my side. When it became obvious I wasn’t going to get anywhere with brute strength, I resorted to tickling him, which made him squirm, squeaking out a laugh. When he opened his mouth to yell at me to stop, I took my chance, thrusting the can into his lips and holding his nose so he swallowed it down.
“No!” His laughter turned into muffled yelling, as he batted his fists at my chest. “No, no, no! Get off, get off!”
His body convulsed as the salt did its job, causing the boy to lurch to his knees and choke up forbidden animal crackers in a gooish sludge which turned my stomach. By the time Rowan seemed half himself and half not, still kneeling, his head pressed against the floor, Harry was poking his head through the door with a goonish grin. “Found you!” He giggled, before forcing the door open, allowing Carmel and Callen, freshly caught and mentally turned into littles, to advance down the stairs with equally terrifying grins. There was something wrong with Harry’s face, and I only realized it when the guy himself was hauling me from the bunker, Carmel dragging a barely responsive Rowan. There was nothing in Harry’s expression, only blind childish excitement at winning the game. When he dragged me out of Allison’s cabin and threw me to the ground, I realized he too had insane strength I had not been expecting. But that thought quickly retracted when I was seeing his face in the light of a crescent moon lighting up the sky an eerie glow. Harry’s cheeks were puffy and swollen, his right eye way bigger than it should have been.
When he spoke, his voice was more of a lisp. This was something far more realistic than magical animal crackers fucking with his brain.
“He needs help!” I managed to choke out when Carmel wrapped jump-rope around my wrists. Next to me, Rowan was refusing to get up, still choking up salty soda, groaning into his hands. Every time Callen tried to restrain him, he hissed out like an animal.
“Do you hear me?!” I struggled violently. “Harry needs—”
BANG.
Is what it felt like. The feeling of something—what felt and sounded like a toy car—colliding with my temples, sent me onto the ground, my head spinning itself off of its axis. I remember lying on my back and frowning at the moon which almost looked like it was getting closer to me, blurring into a white ball of light—before reality sunk in, and it was in fact Carmel’s converse coming down to finish me off. I didn’t stay knocked out for long. But I did dream.
I think you can call it a dream? I was lying in bed at home; my room drowned in the dark. I was cosy, curled up in my blankets, when a clammy hand slammed over my mouth, rousing me from slumber. There were two figures in my room. They didn’t have faces. They just existed as shadows, silhouettes. Before one of them raised something above their head, and… impact.
It was the same impact as the toy car hitting me, snapping me back to that night. It wasn’t a dream. Because I remembered his clammy fingers over my mouth, and his hisses for me to shut up as he dragged me from my room.
My parents stood in front of me with expressions of sympathy. Basked in warm light, my mom and dad looked almost otherworldly. “For the best.” Was what they mouthed when my own phantom screams slammed into me. I asked them why, and they didn’t reply, allowing him to pull me further and further from what I knew, from my life as I knew it. But.. that couldn’t be real. I had memories of getting on the bus to camp Redwood. I could recall the whole journey. So, why… why was my tangled mind saying otherwise?
When I gathered myself, the first thing I realized was I was sitting down. I was outside, cool night air grazing my bare arms. There was something attached to me, jerking violently, And it took me several disorienting blinks to understand that I was tied back to back with Rowan. My head pounded, and something wet and warm dripped down my temple. Great. I could add head injury to the long list of things to worry about.
“Let me go you little fucking witch.”
Rowan was back to himself, though from the muffled hissing and the sound of choking—I had to guess he was being force-fed animal crackers.
“Let me—mpphmmm. little…. fucking… mphmmphhmhppmm!”
“Rowan.” I managed to get out in a croak. Through flickering eyes, I caught glimpse of a familiar figure dancing around us. Shivers rocketed down my spine, and I wrenched at the jump-rope restraints, but they did a surprisingly job of restraining my arms behind my back.
Eleanor was with Rowan, while Eli was knelt in front of me. Looking at him, the boy had definitely aged in the face—and I couldn’t help wondering what exactly he had done as a forty something year old to be sent to this place.
“Josie!” Rowan responded in a wail. “Josie. Wake the FUCK up.”
“Stop swearing.”
Eleanor spoke with the cold tone of her actual age.
“Oh, yeah?” Rowan spluttered. “Fuck you.” The boy’s laugh was still rough from almost vomiting his insides out from too much salt intake. “I’m sorry, you were a fucking boomer all along?!” He wriggled in the restraints, lunging forwards, which sent me backwards.
“Stop swearing, Rowan.” Was all the girl responded with calmly.
“Like I’m going to listen to you!” He sneered. “Fuck, fuck, fuckity, fucking fuck!” What are you going to do, huh? Bite me with your false teeth?” The sound of saliva hitting skin made me wince. He was pissed. I had no doubt his completely rational anger was going to get us killed. Rowan was also somehow getting mixed up between forty and eighty. Though he was unwillingly snacking on mind bending sugary goodness.
“Fudge, Rowan.” Eleanor spoke in a giggle.
“What?!”
“Say fudge. Not fuck.”
“No.”
His hiss of pain caught me off guard. I don’t know what she was doing to him, but it was hurting him.
“You fudging fudge! I’m going to fudging kill you when I get out of these fudging ropes—“ his manic cursing became a muffled yell.
“Say fudge,” Eleanor hummed, followed by his hiss when the palm of her hand skinned his cheek. “Fuck is a bad word. You even said so yourself and you’re my favourite counselor.”
He heaved out a breath.
“You fudge,” Rowan spat. “When I get out of this, I am going to fudging kill you, you fudging—” His manic ranting morphed, once again, into muffled yelling, after another fistful of animal crackers were forced into his mouth. When I risked twisting around, I could see his rebellion slowly starting to simmer out as he relaxed slightly. I wanted to yell at him to keep a clear head before cold fingers were dipping under my chin and forcing my head around where I found myself face to face with Eli.
“I like you, Josie,” he said, before untying me and pulling me to my feet. Now at the age of nine or ten, he was a lot stronger. When I tried to pull away, the cruel blade of a knife grazed my gut. I caught his grin. “But we don’t need you.” Eli pointed to Rowan.
“We just want them.”
I followed his pointer finger which went from Rowan to Harry and Carmel, who were just standing there like fucking idiots, probably awaiting the next game. Harry’s face was getting redder. It looked like he was suffocating, and yet his grin was growing wider and wider, splitting his lips apart. “Rowan Atlas.” Eleanor said, dragging him to his feet. Something was stapled to his forehead head, which caused him to howl in pain, hissing another strangled line of “Fudge”. but I couldn’t read what it was.
“Camp leader. Intelligent, and problem solving skills.”
“Harry Carlisle.” Eli nodded his head with a smile. “Quick thinker. Strong minded.”
“Carmel Locke.” Cassie spoke behind me. She had her arms folded, a wry smile on her lips. “Smarter than she makes out—- an independent learner, and can work well under pressure.”
Looking at these kids, I felt sick to my stomach. They were planning something—and had the intelligence of renowned scientists, which was what I gathered from the footage on the MacBook. “What?” was all I could hiss out, as Eli prodded the blade of the knife into my back, ushering me to walk. “What are you talking about?”
“Duh.” He spoke in a more tweeny giggle. “Like I said, Miss Josie. You’re my favorite counselor but we don’t need you, so I’m going to use you for parts.” He laughed when a shiver spiderwebbed down my spine. “See! I told you I was going to show you my collection!”
“But… what do you need them for?”
Eli pressed his index finger to his lips with a laugh before forcing me to face forwards. “That’s a secret!”
When I didn’t, or couldn’t move, he shoved me into a stumbling power-walk, and I managed to turn my head quickly, making feverish eye contact with Rowan.
“Rowan.” I said calmly through the gutter in my throat. “Get…. Get help.”
If I was going to die, I needed him to get a hold of himself and somehow alert the outside world what was going on.
“From whom, Josie?!” He wailed back—and as I was dragged away, I could once again sense the childish undertones in his voice.
I had no choice but to obey Eli’s orders. If I didn’t want a knife in my back. He took me to the main lunch cabin, which, when I set foot inside, almost sent me to my knees.
Something lurched inside me, and I was screaming with no voice, staggering backwards, only to be shoved onto my face. In front of me was what had been the lunch hall, fully converted into the beginning of a laboratory.
What had been cafeteria tables were fashioned into makeshift gurney’s and beds, and I was looking at all of the missing counselors. Yuri and Noah had been skinned completely, their faces laid out on a makeshift surgical table. Joey had been ripped open, his heart and brain removed, a glittering metallic substance creeping its way across his forehead. It was then when I remembered Eleanor Summers words.
She wanted to prevent death and preserve the human mind. Looking at what was in front of me, this was the start of it. There was equipment I had never seen before. Lily’s body was empty, carved out completely, tubes forced inside her. When I glimpsed her fingers move and begin to ball into a fist, I saw red. I saw fucking red. The exit was so close and yet Eli, fucking Eli, wielded his knife. I think that is when part of me gave up. My brain just stopped. It short circuited. Seeing my friends murdered and yet somehow being kept alive through playing god, my body slumped to the ground. I was numb. Completely numb.
I’m not sure what would have happened if those bloody saws and instruments which had been used on my friends were used on me too.
Luckily, that did not happen. Before Eli could get his slimy hands on me, he crumpled to the ground in an almost cartoon-like fashion, and standing over me was Harry. Who was looking better. When he grasped hold of me and helped me up, I only had one word. “Out.” And he was nodding, his eyes glistening as he drunk in our friends’ fate.
“How?” I managed to sputter out, when we made it out of the cabin, ducking behind a tree. Harry turned to me, motioning for me to shut up. There was a group of now ten to eleven year olds already running around, searching for what I guessed was him.
“I’m allergic to peanut butter,” Harry murmured, his grasp tightening on my wrist as he led me across the camp, the two of us stumbling.
“What, and you just magically healed?”
He didn’t respond to that, which bothered me.
“The bunker is our best shot,” I hissed out. “I think we can get in contact with someone down there.” I paused, unable to stop myself. “What makes you so important?”
“Dunno. Maybe I’m their favorite.”
When we found Allison’s cabin, which was more of a safehouse (an exposed safehouse) I found Rowan sitting on the wooden porch with his legs swinging over the side. “Rowan!” Harry groaned. I found it hard to believe their roles had been switched. Now he was the one yelling at the camp-leader. “I told you to stay inside!”
He ushered the boy inside, before barricading the door with some hefty looking equipment. I could tell from the grin on his face that our so-called leader was once again no longer himself.
I had to bite back a groan. “You’re kidding.” I said, pointing to Rowan, who buried his head in his knees and blew a raspberry. “Does he look and act like our leader right now?!”
“It’s Rowan, Josie.”
“He’s a liability.”
“He’s our friend! Wouldn’t Rowan do the same?”
Yes, he would. But. He would also realize we’re lost causes.
“Gag him with something.” I said. “If he makes any more noise, we’re dumping him.”
“He’s a kid!”
“Just the mind of one.”
I don’t know how animal crackers worked, but his age seemed to be progressively younger. This time he just sat with wide eyes watching us.
Harry almost tore apart the place looking for means of communication, before an old fashioned ringing sound made me jump.
“What was that?” Harry turned to me with his lip curled.
“How am I supposed to know?!” I hissed. “Keep looking!” But when I ducked under the table, my hands crawled under the desk, finding a wire—and attached to that, an ancient looking phone which looked straight out of a 1940’s movie, a bright green rotary phone.
Hesitantly, I answered it, lifting the phone to my ear. “Hello?”
“Did you awaken the subjects, Agent Salta?"
The voice on the other end was a woman, an oldish sounding woman with the tinge of a British accent.
“What?” I shot a look at Harry before shaking my head. “No. My name is Josie Greenfield. We’re at Camp Redwood, and we need help.”
The woman paused.
“Where is Agent Salta?” She cleared her throat. “This line is reserved for communication with agents only.”
“I don’t know who the fuck you’re talking about!" I squeaked out. “My name is Josie, and whatever is happening here, we need help!”
“Josie. Did you awaken the subjects?”
I paused after a moment, shooting Harry a look when he tried to take the phone off of me. “Yes.”
“And… are our agents unavailable?”
“I don’t understand.”
“When a health and safety breach is activated, our agents are awakened to deal with the Project Spearhead subjects if they were to ever go rogue, or become conscious enough to think. Josie, can you tell me what is in front of you? Describe it to me.”
I held my breath. Next to the hidden phone under the desk was what looked like mismatched wires, all of which had been severed. I lowered myself slowly, poking at mess. “Wires. I see… cut up wires.” I whispered. “Does this mean they know about you?”
She hummed. “Ah…That makes sense. The only way to activate our sleeper handlers would be to send out the signal. You appear to have been sabotaged. Unless activated manually, our agents cannot help you. I am sorry. They are your problem now.” The woman paused.
“If I were you, I would hope and pray they have not sabotaged the self-destruct. If you find that, then you may be able to save yourselves and find peace.” She cleared her throat. “Thank you for your service, Josie Greenfield.”
“Wait.” I managed to get out. “Wait, no! You can’t just… you can’t leave us! We need help!”
I found myself yelling at nothing when the phone went dead. The dull tone of the dead ringtone was clanging in my ears before footsteps from up above. “Fuck this.” Harry picked up a lead pipe. “They’re still little kids, right? I mean, their head must still be partly kids—- so let’s fucking beat their heads in.”
He noticed something, then, starting forwards towards the mess of files I had left earlier. Harry knelt on the ground and picked up Eli’s file, his eyes wide. But he wasn’t staring at the dates confirming the little boy’s age.
Instead, Harry pointed at the bottom of the file. “I don’t want to freak you out, Josie,” he whispered. Initially, I didn’t know what he was trying to show before I glimpsed notes scrawled at the bottom of the file, followed by a signature. “But I’m pretty sure that is my fucking writing.”
Harry was right.
I pulled the paperwork off of him, flicking through each file before turning my eyes to him. “Who the fuck are you?”
A clanging sound from above broke the tension, and whatever Harry was about to reply with was strangled in his throat. He slammed a hand over his mouth.
“Guys?”
The voice twisted me up inside, threatening to release a shriek from my mouth I had managed to clamp shut.
Teddy.
“Are you down here?” His voice was strained, and had an odd tone to it. “I can’t… I can’t see you.”
…
Can someone please tell me what the fuck is going on?! It’s been a blur of a week. We’ve managed to stay down here, surviving off of Allison’s rations. Rowan isn’t getting any better. He seems to have stopped mentally de-ageing at the age of maybe six. Harry has spent the last few days trying to get in contact with anyone, but it’s like they are IGNORING US.
I’ve been looking through everything I can find on Project Spearhead, but nothing points to Harry being involved. So. How is his signature all over the files? How is it possible that two friends I thought I knew several days ago, are now complete strangers?
Teddy keeps coming back.
He’s crying out to us.
I think he’s… in pain.
My god, I can’t stand this anymore. Please. CAMP REDWOOD NEEDS HELP.
2023.06.05 00:10 Loud_smell12 Adam’s video regarding Colleen matches all the other ‘big influencers’ of their time
I just finished Adam’s video. I’m new to Colleen but came here because of her podcast with Trisha. I’m NOT a Trisha fan and I am always shocked by the things these influencers get away with. Trisha, Shane, Colleen, James and company all made the same unforgivable mistakes with underage fans. I’m hoping one of these reveal videos one day will be the final nail in the coffin for these horrible ppl
submitted by Loud_smell12 to ColleenBallingerSnark [link] [comments]
2023.06.04 23:42 nudewanderlust Am I the only one who hates Cococay?
Everyone raves about it, I used to be one of those people, but since they started parking two boats there, I really don't like it. Prices have skyrocketed and it's more crowded than ever. We stopped going to the water park since it's often almost $200 and wait times for the slides have gotten ridiculous. Other excursions sell out WAY in advance so if you book relatively close in, you don't have any options including private options to do. Shopping is limited to overpriced garbage at the Straw Market, including magnets that have "Cococay" hand-written over "Nassau" on Bahamas magnets. Pool is nice but always cold. This past trip was the final nail in the coffin for me. It was drizzly raining and people had nowhere to eat that was sheltered from the rain, so they just stood right at the buffets with their plates and ate. Staff said nothing about them dropping taco from their mouth back down onto the buffet.
submitted by nudewanderlust to royalcaribbean [link] [comments]
2023.06.04 23:29 sideswipe781 UFC 289 Betting Preview
Staked: 193.15u, Profit/Loss: +8.41u, ROI: 4.36%, Parlay Suggestions: 51-21
Scroll down for UFC 289 Breakdowns. Below is just a review of last week’s bets.
UFC Vegas 74
Staked: 18.70u
Profit/Loss: -3.31u
Parlay Suggestions: 3-2
✅ 2u Alex Caceres to Win & Arlovski/Mayes Over 1.5 Rounds (+100)
❌ 2u Jim Miller & Jamie Mullarkey to Win (-125)
✅ 2.5u Jim Miller ITD (-105)
✅ 0.5u Jim Miller in Round 1 (+235)
❌ 2u Abubakar Nurmagomedov to Win (-105)
❌ 1.5u Andrei Arlovski to Win by Decision (+200)
❌ 2u Muin Gafarov to Win (-125)
❌ 3u Luan Lacerda to Win (-125)❌ 1u Luan Lacerda to Win by Submission or Decision (+100)
✅ 2u Philipe Lins to Win (+140)
Once again I was my own worst enemy, making some good reads once I initially dropped the preview (Lins, Caceres, Elliott) but consistently made tweaks in the build-up that sent things south. I really need to be more disciplined and block out the noise once I’ve made my initial conclusions. I remember when I started posting here I was tipping about four bets maximum…now I apparently have action across almost every fight.
Going forward I think I’ll stop analysing each bet in this section, as no-one seems to really comment on that stuff and it just eats into the overall character count.
So let’s get into the PPV.
UFC 289
This is a weird, weird PPV card. I guess they kind of have to have a title fight at the top of the billing over a number-one contender bout as co-main, but to see Mike Malott, Nate Landwehr and Eryk Anders perform before Charles Oliveira…and then Amanda Nunes as the main event, is quite funny. Canadian MMA has been in ruins since GSP and Rory MacDonald left the UFC, and none of the guys on this card are not the one to restore its glory.
I know I say it every time the PPV event rolls around, but MMA oddsmakers are very sharp for these higher profile events. Once again I find myself coming to very similar conclusions for a lot of the fights here, so I very much expect this one to be a much smaller slate for me. Definitely a good idea given what I said in the review of last week.
Amanda Nunes v Irene Aldana
There’s a very loud narrative surrounding Amanda Nunes these days, and it’s a hard one to ignore. Having been in the UFC for a decade and holding a title for 7 years, there’s literally nothing left for her to do. She’s had the big money fights that Women’s MMA can offer (Rousey, Cyborg & the “redemption” sequel with Pena), and she doesn’t seem interested in setting up another fight with Shevchenko (who, to be fair, she’s beaten twice). What else is there for Nunes to be motivated for?
Outside the cage, She’s started a family with Nina Ansaroff, who also retired very recently and has spoken about wanting a second child with Nunes. The Brazilian has spoken quite candidly about her aspirations to retire very soon as well, and I believe that she would have laid her gloves in the centre of the Octagon if she’d beaten Pena in their initial meeting. She had to right the wrongs in the sequel, but a victory over Pena at UFC 289 to make it 2-1 in the series was probably enough of a narrative for Nunes to put her career to bed then and there. It’s a bold prediction, but I have a hunch that Nunes has done this whole training camp knowing it’s going to be her last.
Unfortunately, Pena was forced to withdraw and Irene Aldana steps in to challenge for the belt instead. Mexican MMA is absolutely booming right now, with three champions in the last few months, and the stage really feels set for Aldana. She’s always had very impressive boxing, as well as some opportunistic submissions…but her inability to stuff takedowns has often been her undoing in her career. Given that Nunes has relied heavily on her wrestling in recent years (20 takedowns in her last 4 wins), I think it’s fair to say Nunes should once again be favoured here.
Women’s Bantamweight and Featherweight have been underdeveloped weight classes for some time now, where the same names that were competing for the belt in like 2019 are still in the top 5 (looking at you Holly Holm!). The next generation seems to have broken through at Flyweight, with Valentina losing her last two title defences (not officially, but I scored the first one quite confidently for Santos). Nunes has been fortunate enough to govern over a division that doesn’t have many of those up-and-coming prospects yet, but those on the rise are still training and competing in a modern MMA context more frequently than the champion – which makes me think the changing of the guard could happen sometime soon. (For more on this, I asked a hypothetical question in the comment section).
So, overall, I think there are a lot of valid asterisks on Nunes’ name at the moment, and I think her career is coming to an end sometime soon, if not after this fight. However, if she’s fighting at her optimum then Aldana’s weaknesses can certainly be exploited, and are enough to deem her the Champion as favourite. With that said, I actually think Aldana could more than hold her own in the striking, so I would already be lining this one closer than Nunes normally is…and after adding in the narrative that surrounds the fight I think it gets even closer.
Therefore, I’ll be playing a 0.5u “value bet” on Aldana. It’s not something I expect to win, but I think her chances of winning are much greater than the odds available.
How I line this fight: Amanda Nunes -175 (64%), Irene Aldana +175 (36%)
Bet or Pass: 0.5u Irene Aldana to Win (+300)
Notable Props: I'd encourage you to play Nunes by Submission or Decision if you wanted to play her.
Charles Oliveira v Beneil Dariush
Oh this is a spicy one. Charles Oliveira holds a special place in my heart as being my favourite fighter of all time, and he’s the fighter I’ve definitely made the most money on in my time betting on MMA. At the start of that massive win streak he went on, you could get a decent price on Oliveira ITD against so many prelim guys, and the underdog prices available against Kevin Lee, Tony Ferguson, Michael Chandler and Dustin Poirier were even better.
But, as we know, Islam Makhachev exists and did a sensational job against Oliveira. Such a good job in fact, that I expect it to be footage that Beneil Dariush and his camp have dissected in great detail.
Dariush is an equally exciting fighter to watch. He’s got a brilliant skillset, but he’s not particularly athletic which makes him a very unassuming fighter. He looks like some bloke that works in HR in your office…not an elite Lightweight UFC fighter.
I think Dariush’s BJJ abilities are going to be the key to this fight, as we’ve seen many times in his career already. High level BJJ is a brilliant quality because not only does it make you dangerous at finishing fights, it also improves your defence and provides the platform for a wrestling based offence. We saw Dariush make full use of this in his wins over Tony Ferguson, Carlos Diego Ferreira (x2) and Thiago Moises, as well as his takedown defence on display against Gamrot. I feel like he’s going to be able to dictate where the fight takes place here.
What interests me is the competitiveness of the striking. If you’ve been watching this sport religiously for over seven years, you’ll still remember when Dariush was thought to have a glass jaw, where the likes of Alex Hernandez, Drew Dober and Drakkar Klose hurt him badly with strikes. I feel like Dariush has had quite favourable matchmaking against that weakness on his recent streak, and Oliveira is potentially one of the biggest threats he’s faced on the feet in recent years in terms of power.
On the flipside, Oliveira is still as reckless as ever, and has been knocked down or hurt in each of his last four title fights. Only Makhachev came away with a win in those fights, because his grappling was at a good enough level that he was happy to follow Charles down to the mat when he knocked him down, and capitalised fully to secure the submission soon after. Dariush has sneaky power himself, and if he is able to land a knockdown on Oliveira then I think we see him capitalise too.
The volatility is going to be massive in this fight, as both men are hard hitters with durability concerns (maybe not in a fight ending sense, but they frequently get rocked). With that in mind, I think any sort of finish is going to be very live in this fight. If not, I think you have to give Dariush the decision winning potential, as I think his ability to find top position is greater than Oliveira’s. It’s enough to make Benny the favourite, but not by a whole lot. I think the books have got this one priced spot on, actually.
How I line this fight: Charles Oliveira +110 (48%), Beneil Dariush -110 (52%)
Bet or Pass: Pass
Notable Props: FDGTD is probably a decent parlay piece at -200 or better
Live Betting Lean: I think the longer this fight goes, the more it favours Dariush due to his round winning superiority.
Mike Malott v Adam Fugitt
Honestly the fact that I’m breaking down this fight straight after Oliveira v Dariush is hilarious. I wouldn’t even question it if this was on the prelims of an Apex card.
I underestimated Mike Malott in his last fight against Yohan Lainesse, and my take was so bad that I looked like an idiot. He impressed me a lot, and I think he impressed the UFC too for them to give him this spot on the main card.
Malott looks to have really good submission ability, but I’m still a bit concerned that his striking might be a few too many steps behind. People will say things looked improved in the Lainesse fight, but I think that was more a case of Lainesse having no real interest in engaging or committing to his strikes in the early goings (he has become gunshy as to manage cardio). The fight against Mickey Gall was a massive, massive red flag for Malott…no one in the UFC should really be getting outstruck by Gall. That footage was from a year ago though, so there’s a chance he has improved things since then…but I don’t think you can really use the Lainesse fight as evidence of that.
Malott faces Adam Fugitt, who took the ‘sacrificial lamb’ approach to entering the UFC when he was paired up with Michael Morales – who is lowkey a very bright young prospect. It’s important not to judge a fighter by their performance in that type of fight, it’s best to instead treat their sophomore fight as their ‘real’ debut. We saw that with Fugitt, as he dominated Yusaku Kinoshita as a +260 underdog earlier this year.
I was quite impressed with Fugitt in his loss to Morales. His striking clearly wasn’t on Morales’ level, and he’ll have to be careful of Malott’s powerful hands, but he showed decent defensive awareness and had a couple of moments of his own. Fugitt’s a bit too kick heavy for my liking, but it looks like it confuses opponents and actually works well at establishing range. It did exactly that in his Solomon Renfro win.
Malott’s fight against Renfro however, despite only being 90 seconds long, really sums up his abilities as a fighter. He was getting tagged on the feet, but managed to find one moment to land a powerful shot and sinked in a choke in the blink of an eye. He was losing 98% of that fight convincingly.
The big question for this fight revolves around Fugitt’s grappling ability on bottom, and initial takedown defence, as that’s where most of Malott’s win equity is going to be. Unfortunately we have not actually seen him defensive grapple, so honestly it’s impossible to accurately line this fight given how integral it should be. The only inclination I have is that Fugitt’s takedowns have looked really good in his two fights. DC was very impressed with how he got Morales down, and his trips were also looking on point against Kinoshita. He did great work on top as well when he did establish position, and worked his way to a finish efficiently.
However, there can sometimes be a big disparity between a wrestler’s grappling ability on top vs on bottom, which is why BJJ is so important to MMA (see the breakdown of Dariush!). Therefore, complimenting Fugitt’s top position grappling doesn’t mean a whole lot, as he could be atrocious on bottom, and even if he does use wrestling himself he’s going to dive headfirst into Malott’s nasty guillotine.
So in conclusion, you can’t have super strong opinions on this fight, but you can deduce that Malott has more ways to win. If Fugitt isn’t winning via striking, it’s likely he’s not winning at all. Malott, on the other hand, could win with a big shot on the feet, through takedowns and top control of his own, or even from a guard submission on bottom.
Therefore, with Malott being the hometown hero and likely taking all the betting action on the moneyline, I think the books have the liberty to juice his odds a fair bit. -200 is probably an example of that, but it’s not too far off where I’d line this fight. There are still enough unknowns about both men that I wouldn’t be too surprised to see Fugitt pull off the upset, but I think the +170 available on him in return isn’t providing a whole lot of value. Smart work by the oddsmakers.
How I line this fight: Mike Malott -175 (64%), Adam Fugitt +175 (36%)
Bet or Pass: Pass
Notable Props: Malott by Submission would be the bet I’d make at +200 or better if someone told me I had to. Won’t be playing it though.
Dan Ige v Nate Landwehr
Well it seems the UFC matchmakers have confirmed their position on Dan Ige. He’s a top 15 gatekeeper now! His string of losses to Evloev, Emmett, Korean Zombie and Kattar did put one too many nails in his title aspiration coffin, but those bounce-back performances against Gavin Tucker and Damon Jackson were pretty impressive to me.
Ige is still a very, very tricky fighter to beat because he’s so well rounded, as most of the top 15 at Featherweight are. Ige faces Nate Landwehr, who has been on an entertaining run of form in the UFC – beating the likes of Ludovit Klein, David Onama and Austin Lingo. Whilst running through his record, it is important to note he went to a close decision in a striking bout against Darren Elkins, and also lost to Herbert Burns and Julian Erosa.
As I say quite often in higher level FeatheBantam/Fly-Weight breakdowns, they’re very tricky divisions to identify skill gaps in. The elite in the division are all very well-rounded offensively and defensively, so it often feels like you’re splitting hairs when you’re trying to find attributes that favour one fighter over the other.
The same can kind of be said here, except Dan Ige has the much better record in terms of actual wins and overall experience. If I imagine Nate Landwehr competing against Ige’s last eight opponents, I genuinely think he might win 1 or 2 of them…whilst Ige has won 4, not been finished in any of the losses and given a good account of himself on each scorecard (except the Evloev loss).
So honestly, the only real thing I feel I can reference here in terms of differentiating between both men is ‘levels’…but I genuinely think that’s enough for Ige to be about -200 here. You can’t go any further than that because this fight should still be reasonably competitive, but given what Ige has done to the opponents he’s stepped down in competition for (Damon Jackson, Gavin Tucker), I think you can have a certain degree of confidence that he should find that extra 10% to clearly win this fight. That equates to around -175 in my mind.
How I line this fight: Dan Ige -175 (64%), Nate Landwehr +175 (36%)
Bet or Pass: Pass
Notable Props: Ige ITD could be of some interest, as he’s started showing real power in his hands, and Landwehr is quite finish-able in his losses.
Marc-Andre Barriault v Eryk Anders
Eryk Anders is one of the most frustrating guys to watch. He had so much athleticism and decent skills, but just doesn’t put his best foot forward. Barely any evolution to his game, poor fight IQ…but the occasional glimmers of potential – enough to stop you from writing him off despite his constant underdelivering.
Marc-Andre Barriault is kind of the opposite really. He’s a jack-of-all-trades, master of none…but he will do everything in his power to maximise his advantages to turn the fight in his favour. He isn’t a physical specimen and doesn’t really have much power…but he can hustle hard for 15 minutes and use a mixture of striking, takedowns and clinch work to win rounds.
Anders has actually had some of his better performances in recent fights, looking in great shape and form against Kyle Daukaus, arguably beating Jun Yong Park by decision, and outpoint + KO’ing Darren Stewart (x2) beforehand.
If this fight was happening two years ago, MAB would be like -200 here due to his reliability to out-hustle Anders, but his recent performances have been a little bit lacklustre (Hernandez ragdolled him and Chidi Njokuani folded him like a deckchair). Couple that with the fact that Anders FINALLY looks to be growing into the potential he’s always been on the cusp of with a recent change in training camp…I think you’re looking at a closely lined fight here.
I predict this one ends up being a 29-28, possibly split decision type of fight. One man has activity whilst the other has power. The subjectivity of judging will be in full effect and everyone will call this one a robbery, depending on who they bet on.
How I line this fight: Marc-Andre Barriault +100 (50%), Eryk Anders +100 (50%)
Bet or Pass: Pass
Notable Props: Barriault by Decision would probably be my preferred choice.
Jasmine Jasudavicius v Miranda Maverick
Miranda Maverick is a Women’s MMA fighter that I hold in very high regard. The back-to-back losses put a real halt to her hype train, but I think she’s easily got Top 10 potential and got robbed against Maycee Barber anyway. I think her style is one that can very easily exploit a lot of opponents in her division. Her striking’s okay, but her wrestling and top pressure are very dominant tools.
She takes on Jasmine Jasudavicius, who has also used her wrestling ability to good effect in the UFC/DWCS so far. Neither woman is a particularly good striker, and I expect this one to turn into a bit of a scramble fest pretty quickly.
Their statures have been very important factors in their grappling successes so far, but for different reasons. JJ is basically a size bully at 5’7 and will have a 4 inch height advantage once again. Maverick, on the other hand, is going to be the stronger of the two during those close quarter engagements, because she’s pretty damn jacked.
I think Maverick should be favoured overall as I think her wrestling is the superior of the two and should lead to more time in top position, but I’m definitely not keen to play her at -275. Miranda’s strengths are also her opponent’s strengths, and facing the lanky size of Jasudavicius could cause her problems when it comes to securing the initial takedowns against those long legs, or keeping safe from guard submissions or maintaining that dominant position in the first place. Also, if they do somehow end up choosing to strike for significant portions, I can’t actually guarantee that Maverick is the better on the feet (reach disadvantage plays a part too).
I do however like Maverick to win this one, but not by the confidence of the current odds. I’m expecting this one to go the distance, but I highly doubt we get a good line on it as Maverick couldn’t even finish Shanna Young last time out.
How I line this fight: Jasmine Jasudavicius +188 (35%), Miranda Maverick -188 (65%)
Bet or Pass: Pass.
Notable Props: Fight goes to decision. It's probably like -400.
Blake Bilder v Kyle Nelson
There are a couple of fights on this card where one guy is clearly more populasuccessful/in-form than their opponent, but they’re still only around -200 (Dan Ige & Mike Malott are the best examples). Blake Bilder is the third. Before I jumped into research for all three of these bouts, I was instinctively thinking that I could easily want to bet all three at -200, as that didn’t seem short enough by my initial perception of their names. I came away from Ige and Malott agreeing with the line and feeling grateful that I looked into it…but I still think Blake Bilder’s odds are providing a bit of value.
Kyle Nelson is one of those fodder guys. The UFC are keeping him around to give to prospects and home-town fighters in the hope that they can invest in the future or the event itself. Jai Herbert notched a win for Team UK against Nelson on a UFC London card, Doo Ho Choi got given a softball to get him back on track for a card that was supposed to be in South Korea. Billy Quarantillo got given Nelson to put his name on the map with a highlight reel finish..and now Blake Bilder is being presented the chance to extend his UFC record to 2-0.
Bilder’s already fought a better opponent in the UFC when he beat Shane Young in February. We saw a very high pace being set in the third round of that fight, with both men landing 100+ significant strikes across the fight and Bilder also attempting 7 takedowns. His cardio is clearly quite decent, which will immediately give him the advantage over Nelson – who has often wilted in the latter half of a fight when the pace has been hectic.
Bilder’s a very well-rounded combatant, and has great BJJ once he gets established time on top. He’s a bit of a concern defensively though, where he can be taken down and can also get caught with strikes.
Kyle Nelson, on the other hand, doesn’t really seem to know what kind of fighter he is. He’s been a brawler for all of his UFC career, but comes out to land five takedowns and is seemingly not interested in striking with a Doo Ho Choi who has questionable durability. He didn’t do much at all with those takedowns either and actually put himself in danger in R1 by insisting on grappling.
If Nelson comes out looking to wrestle Bilder, I think they’re at different levels in the grappling and Blake should be able to turn things around in his favour. If they’re striking, I am aware that Nelson’s got fight ending power, but Bilder’s been much more patient and cerebral in his last couple of fights, so I trust him to stay safe and look for his openings. We saw him reactively find a takedown off of Shane Young’s kick, and Nelson’s offense is very body kick heavy.
Overall, I just think Bilder is the better fighter in pretty much every facet of MMA except one-punch power and, as long as he doesn’t get flash KO’d, I think he rolls here. -200 isn’t quite short enough, and I expect money to come in on him between now and fight night. I’ve already got my money down, just in case.
How I line this fight: Blake Bilder -300 (75%), Kyle Nelson +300 (25%)
Bet or Pass: 5u Blake Bilder to Win (-200)
Notable Props: Bilder ITD or R3 could be interesting. I'd probably be interested in that if I didn't have a lot of exposure already.
Aiemann Zahabi v Aoriqileng
There was a time where Aiemann Zahabi was considered one of the worst guys on the roster. Crazy that the standard of UFC fighter has gotten so much worse that that statement seems ridiculous now. To be fair, Zahabi did pull off a respectable upset in beating Ricky Turcios in his last fight..but it seems to be unanimously agreed that Ricky fought like an idiot in that fight and actually beat himself.
Aoriqileng is quite explosive and clearly hits hard, but he’s a bit too keen to hunt for the KO and it hurts his minute-winning ability. Against someone like Zahabi, who is quite composed and process driven (how could you not be when Firas is your family and coach), and I see that being a pretty key part to this fight. The big moments will side with the Mongolian, but Aiemann could just put together the more cohesive performance if he doesn’t get troubled by that explosiveness.
Overall this is just a pretty low level fight between guys who don’t compete very often. I didn’t have a whole lot to say prior to watching tape, and I’ve come away feeling equally uncertain of how this one’s going to end. An easy pass when there are more active and popular fighters for us to form a stronger opinion on.
How I line this fight: I don’t really know.
Bet or Pass: Pass
Notable Props: None
Nassourdine Imavov v Chris Curtis
This one instantly feels like a pretty close fight, solely based off both men’s most recent losses. Imavov getting outstruck by Sean Strickland across 25 minutes was a bit of a shock to everyone, myself included. I expected him to lose via cardio dump, but it was actually just lesser volume, a lack of takedowns being attempted and obviously not landing anything of significance on Strickland.
It’s widely known that Chris Curtis and Sean Strickland are close training partners at Xtreme Couture, which I think makes for an added element to this fight. On six days notice, Strickland and the team managed to devise a pretty genius striking gameplan with disruptive rhythm that completely threw Imavov of. Can Chris Curtis do the same? Probably.
Curtis himself has problems of his own in the striking though, namely that his volume and output just aren’t where they often need to be. I’m not sure whether it’s the managing of his gas tank or what, but he just doesn’t seem able to commit to matching his opponent’s tempo across 15 minutes. He threw the first round away against Gastelum, and it cost him the fight. He bitched and moaned about it on Twitter, but social media’s been telling the guy what his problem is for as long as he’s been in the UFC haha.
I do suspect that there’s a little bit of recency bias on Imavov here, as the guy was a pretty well-respected prospect prior to the loss to Strickland. Some will tell you it was misplaced faith, but he certainly doesn’t have tempo issues in the latter half of fights and should probably have the higher volume across 15 minutes. I don’t see him taking Curtis down either, given the 100% takedown defence and the fact Imavov seemingly abandoned it in his last fight. It would be great if he did though!
So yeah, it’s a bit of a close one this. Off pure skillset I lean towards Imavov at like -150, but the asterisk of Curtis’ team being able to easily design a gameplan against the Frenchman gives me enough pause to not want to pick a side here. I’d be more interested in betting overs, if a decent price is available.
How I line this fight: Nassourdine Imavov -137 (58%), Chris Curtis +137 (42%)
Bet or Pass: 1.5u Fight Goes to Decision (-137 or better)
Notable Props: I think this one goes to decision at a pretty high clip.
Diana Belbita v Maria Oliveira
My initial thought was “What would compel someone to bet on this fight?”, then I remember I placed 100 quid on Chase Hooper a few weeks ago…and it was a great bet haha! Given how most of my handicapping for this card has seen me in complete agreement with the books, perhaps looking into a lower level fight with significantly less interest could be the place to a strong opinion!?
Nope. I can’t do it. One quick glance at their records was enough for me. Belbita got 30-25’d by a wrestling Molly McCann and submitted by Liana Jojua, whilst Maria Oliveira got soundly beaten on the scorecards by Vanesa Demopoulos and voluntarily asked to stop fighting after 3 minutes against Marina Rodriguez.
This one isn’t good enough to open an Apex card, let alone sit on a PPV. I usually really dislike all the WMMA bashing on this sub, but this one isn’t worth the time.
How I line this fight: No.
Bet or Pass: No.
Notable Props: No.
Live Betting Lean: You could do something productive with that 15 minutes. Lift some weights, make some food, rewatch Ngannou v Lewis instead?
Bets
0.5u Irene Aldana to Win (+300)
5u Blake Bilder to Win (-200)
1.5u Imavov v Curtis Goes to Decision (-137 or better) (Might not get this kind of price).
Parlay Do’s: Dan Ige, Blake Bilder, Imavov/Curtis GTD, Maverick/Jasudavicius GTD
Parlay Don’ts: Amanda Nunes, Mike Malott, Miranda Maverick
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Scroll down for UFC 289 Breakdowns. Below is just a review of last week’s bets.
UFC Vegas 74
Staked: 18.70u
Profit/Loss: -3.31u
Parlay Suggestions: 3-2
✅ 2u Alex Caceres to Win & Arlovski/Mayes Over 1.5 Rounds (+100)
❌ 2u Jim Miller & Jamie Mullarkey to Win (-125)
✅ 2.5u Jim Miller ITD (-105)
✅ 0.5u Jim Miller in Round 1 (+235)
❌ 2u Abubakar Nurmagomedov to Win (-105)
❌ 1.5u Andrei Arlovski to Win by Decision (+200)
❌ 2u Muin Gafarov to Win (-125)
❌ 3u Luan Lacerda to Win (-125)❌ 1u Luan Lacerda to Win by Submission or Decision (+100)
✅ 2u Philipe Lins to Win (+140)
Once again I was my own worst enemy, making some good reads once I initially dropped the preview (Lins, Caceres, Elliott) but consistently made tweaks in the build-up that sent things south. I really need to be more disciplined and block out the noise once I’ve made my initial conclusions. I remember when I started posting here I was tipping about four bets maximum…now I apparently have action across almost every fight.
Going forward I think I’ll stop analysing each bet in this section, as no-one seems to really comment on that stuff and it just eats into the overall character count.
So let’s get into the PPV.
UFC 289
This is a weird, weird PPV card. I guess they kind of have to have a title fight at the top of the billing over a number-one contender bout as co-main, but to see Mike Malott, Nate Landwehr and Eryk Anders perform before Charles Oliveira…and then Amanda Nunes as the main event, is quite funny. Canadian MMA has been in ruins since GSP and Rory MacDonald left the UFC, and none of the guys on this card are not the one to restore its glory.
I know I say it every time the PPV event rolls around, but MMA oddsmakers are very sharp for these higher profile events. Once again I find myself coming to very similar conclusions for a lot of the fights here, so I very much expect this one to be a much smaller slate for me. Definitely a good idea given what I said in the review of last week.
Amanda Nunes v Irene Aldana
There’s a very loud narrative surrounding Amanda Nunes these days, and it’s a hard one to ignore. Having been in the UFC for a decade and holding a title for 7 years, there’s literally nothing left for her to do. She’s had the big money fights that Women’s MMA can offer (Rousey, Cyborg & the “redemption” sequel with Pena), and she doesn’t seem interested in setting up another fight with Shevchenko (who, to be fair, she’s beaten twice). What else is there for Nunes to be motivated for?
Outside the cage, She’s started a family with Nina Ansaroff, who also retired very recently and has spoken about wanting a second child with Nunes. The Brazilian has spoken quite candidly about her aspirations to retire very soon as well, and I believe that she would have laid her gloves in the centre of the Octagon if she’d beaten Pena in their initial meeting. She had to right the wrongs in the sequel, but a victory over Pena at UFC 289 to make it 2-1 in the series was probably enough of a narrative for Nunes to put her career to bed then and there. It’s a bold prediction, but I have a hunch that Nunes has done this whole training camp knowing it’s going to be her last.
Unfortunately, Pena was forced to withdraw and Irene Aldana steps in to challenge for the belt instead. Mexican MMA is absolutely booming right now, with three champions in the last few months, and the stage really feels set for Aldana. She’s always had very impressive boxing, as well as some opportunistic submissions…but her inability to stuff takedowns has often been her undoing in her career. Given that Nunes has relied heavily on her wrestling in recent years (20 takedowns in her last 4 wins), I think it’s fair to say Nunes should once again be favoured here.
Women’s Bantamweight and Featherweight have been underdeveloped weight classes for some time now, where the same names that were competing for the belt in like 2019 are still in the top 5 (looking at you Holly Holm!). The next generation seems to have broken through at Flyweight, with Valentina losing her last two title defences (not officially, but I scored the first one quite confidently for Santos). Nunes has been fortunate enough to govern over a division that doesn’t have many of those up-and-coming prospects yet, but those on the rise are still training and competing in a modern MMA context more frequently than the champion – which makes me think the changing of the guard could happen sometime soon. (For more on this, I asked a hypothetical question in the comment section).
So, overall, I think there are a lot of valid asterisks on Nunes’ name at the moment, and I think her career is coming to an end sometime soon, if not after this fight. However, if she’s fighting at her optimum then Aldana’s weaknesses can certainly be exploited, and are enough to deem her the Champion as favourite. With that said, I actually think Aldana could more than hold her own in the striking, so I would already be lining this one closer than Nunes normally is…and after adding in the narrative that surrounds the fight I think it gets even closer.
Therefore, I’ll be playing a 0.5u “value bet” on Aldana. It’s not something I expect to win, but I think her chances of winning are much greater than the odds available.
How I line this fight: Amanda Nunes -175 (64%), Irene Aldana +175 (36%)
Bet or Pass: 0.5u Irene Aldana to Win (+300)
Notable Props: I'd encourage you to play Nunes by Submission or Decision if you wanted to play her.
Charles Oliveira v Beneil Dariush
Oh this is a spicy one. Charles Oliveira holds a special place in my heart as being my favourite fighter of all time, and he’s the fighter I’ve definitely made the most money on in my time betting on MMA. At the start of that massive win streak he went on, you could get a decent price on Oliveira ITD against so many prelim guys, and the underdog prices available against Kevin Lee, Tony Ferguson, Michael Chandler and Dustin Poirier were even better.
But, as we know, Islam Makhachev exists and did a sensational job against Oliveira. Such a good job in fact, that I expect it to be footage that Beneil Dariush and his camp have dissected in great detail.
Dariush is an equally exciting fighter to watch. He’s got a brilliant skillset, but he’s not particularly athletic which makes him a very unassuming fighter. He looks like some bloke that works in HR in your office…not an elite Lightweight UFC fighter.
I think Dariush’s BJJ abilities are going to be the key to this fight, as we’ve seen many times in his career already. High level BJJ is a brilliant quality because not only does it make you dangerous at finishing fights, it also improves your defence and provides the platform for a wrestling based offence. We saw Dariush make full use of this in his wins over Tony Ferguson, Carlos Diego Ferreira (x2) and Thiago Moises, as well as his takedown defence on display against Gamrot. I feel like he’s going to be able to dictate where the fight takes place here.
What interests me is the competitiveness of the striking. If you’ve been watching this sport religiously for over seven years, you’ll still remember when Dariush was thought to have a glass jaw, where the likes of Alex Hernandez, Drew Dober and Drakkar Klose hurt him badly with strikes. I feel like Dariush has had quite favourable matchmaking against that weakness on his recent streak, and Oliveira is potentially one of the biggest threats he’s faced on the feet in recent years in terms of power.
On the flipside, Oliveira is still as reckless as ever, and has been knocked down or hurt in each of his last four title fights. Only Makhachev came away with a win in those fights, because his grappling was at a good enough level that he was happy to follow Charles down to the mat when he knocked him down, and capitalised fully to secure the submission soon after. Dariush has sneaky power himself, and if he is able to land a knockdown on Oliveira then I think we see him capitalise too.
The volatility is going to be massive in this fight, as both men are hard hitters with durability concerns (maybe not in a fight ending sense, but they frequently get rocked). With that in mind, I think any sort of finish is going to be very live in this fight. If not, I think you have to give Dariush the decision winning potential, as I think his ability to find top position is greater than Oliveira’s. It’s enough to make Benny the favourite, but not by a whole lot. I think the books have got this one priced spot on, actually.
How I line this fight: Charles Oliveira +110 (48%), Beneil Dariush -110 (52%)
Bet or Pass: Pass
Notable Props: FDGTD is probably a decent parlay piece at -200 or better
Live Betting Lean: I think the longer this fight goes, the more it favours Dariush due to his round winning superiority.
Mike Malott v Adam Fugitt
Honestly the fact that I’m breaking down this fight straight after Oliveira v Dariush is hilarious. I wouldn’t even question it if this was on the prelims of an Apex card.
I underestimated Mike Malott in his last fight against Yohan Lainesse, and my take was so bad that I looked like an idiot. He impressed me a lot, and I think he impressed the UFC too for them to give him this spot on the main card.
Malott looks to have really good submission ability, but I’m still a bit concerned that his striking might be a few too many steps behind. People will say things looked improved in the Lainesse fight, but I think that was more a case of Lainesse having no real interest in engaging or committing to his strikes in the early goings (he has become gunshy as to manage cardio). The fight against Mickey Gall was a massive, massive red flag for Malott…no one in the UFC should really be getting outstruck by Gall. That footage was from a year ago though, so there’s a chance he has improved things since then…but I don’t think you can really use the Lainesse fight as evidence of that.
Malott faces Adam Fugitt, who took the ‘sacrificial lamb’ approach to entering the UFC when he was paired up with Michael Morales – who is lowkey a very bright young prospect. It’s important not to judge a fighter by their performance in that type of fight, it’s best to instead treat their sophomore fight as their ‘real’ debut. We saw that with Fugitt, as he dominated Yusaku Kinoshita as a +260 underdog earlier this year.
I was quite impressed with Fugitt in his loss to Morales. His striking clearly wasn’t on Morales’ level, and he’ll have to be careful of Malott’s powerful hands, but he showed decent defensive awareness and had a couple of moments of his own. Fugitt’s a bit too kick heavy for my liking, but it looks like it confuses opponents and actually works well at establishing range. It did exactly that in his Solomon Renfro win.
Malott’s fight against Renfro however, despite only being 90 seconds long, really sums up his abilities as a fighter. He was getting tagged on the feet, but managed to find one moment to land a powerful shot and sinked in a choke in the blink of an eye. He was losing 98% of that fight convincingly.
The big question for this fight revolves around Fugitt’s grappling ability on bottom, and initial takedown defence, as that’s where most of Malott’s win equity is going to be. Unfortunately we have not actually seen him defensive grapple, so honestly it’s impossible to accurately line this fight given how integral it should be. The only inclination I have is that Fugitt’s takedowns have looked really good in his two fights. DC was very impressed with how he got Morales down, and his trips were also looking on point against Kinoshita. He did great work on top as well when he did establish position, and worked his way to a finish efficiently.
However, there can sometimes be a big disparity between a wrestler’s grappling ability on top vs on bottom, which is why BJJ is so important to MMA (see the breakdown of Dariush!). Therefore, complimenting Fugitt’s top position grappling doesn’t mean a whole lot, as he could be atrocious on bottom, and even if he does use wrestling himself he’s going to dive headfirst into Malott’s nasty guillotine.
So in conclusion, you can’t have super strong opinions on this fight, but you can deduce that Malott has more ways to win. If Fugitt isn’t winning via striking, it’s likely he’s not winning at all. Malott, on the other hand, could win with a big shot on the feet, through takedowns and top control of his own, or even from a guard submission on bottom.
Therefore, with Malott being the hometown hero and likely taking all the betting action on the moneyline, I think the books have the liberty to juice his odds a fair bit. -200 is probably an example of that, but it’s not too far off where I’d line this fight. There are still enough unknowns about both men that I wouldn’t be too surprised to see Fugitt pull off the upset, but I think the +170 available on him in return isn’t providing a whole lot of value. Smart work by the oddsmakers.
How I line this fight: Mike Malott -175 (64%), Adam Fugitt +175 (36%)
Bet or Pass: Pass
Notable Props: Malott by Submission would be the bet I’d make at +200 or better if someone told me I had to. Won’t be playing it though.
Dan Ige v Nate Landwehr
Well it seems the UFC matchmakers have confirmed their position on Dan Ige. He’s a top 15 gatekeeper now! His string of losses to Evloev, Emmett, Korean Zombie and Kattar did put one too many nails in his title aspiration coffin, but those bounce-back performances against Gavin Tucker and Damon Jackson were pretty impressive to me.
Ige is still a very, very tricky fighter to beat because he’s so well rounded, as most of the top 15 at Featherweight are. Ige faces Nate Landwehr, who has been on an entertaining run of form in the UFC – beating the likes of Ludovit Klein, David Onama and Austin Lingo. Whilst running through his record, it is important to note he went to a close decision in a striking bout against Darren Elkins, and also lost to Herbert Burns and Julian Erosa.
As I say quite often in higher level FeatheBantam/Fly-Weight breakdowns, they’re very tricky divisions to identify skill gaps in. The elite in the division are all very well-rounded offensively and defensively, so it often feels like you’re splitting hairs when you’re trying to find attributes that favour one fighter over the other.
The same can kind of be said here, except Dan Ige has the much better record in terms of actual wins and overall experience. If I imagine Nate Landwehr competing against Ige’s last eight opponents, I genuinely think he might win 1 or 2 of them…whilst Ige has won 4, not been finished in any of the losses and given a good account of himself on each scorecard (except the Evloev loss).
So honestly, the only real thing I feel I can reference here in terms of differentiating between both men is ‘levels’…but I genuinely think that’s enough for Ige to be about -200 here. You can’t go any further than that because this fight should still be reasonably competitive, but given what Ige has done to the opponents he’s stepped down in competition for (Damon Jackson, Gavin Tucker), I think you can have a certain degree of confidence that he should find that extra 10% to clearly win this fight. That equates to around -175 in my mind.
How I line this fight: Dan Ige -175 (64%), Nate Landwehr +175 (36%)
Bet or Pass: Pass
Notable Props: Ige ITD could be of some interest, as he’s started showing real power in his hands, and Landwehr is quite finish-able in his losses.
Marc-Andre Barriault v Eryk Anders
Eryk Anders is one of the most frustrating guys to watch. He had so much athleticism and decent skills, but just doesn’t put his best foot forward. Barely any evolution to his game, poor fight IQ…but the occasional glimmers of potential – enough to stop you from writing him off despite his constant underdelivering.
Marc-Andre Barriault is kind of the opposite really. He’s a jack-of-all-trades, master of none…but he will do everything in his power to maximise his advantages to turn the fight in his favour. He isn’t a physical specimen and doesn’t really have much power…but he can hustle hard for 15 minutes and use a mixture of striking, takedowns and clinch work to win rounds.
Anders has actually had some of his better performances in recent fights, looking in great shape and form against Kyle Daukaus, arguably beating Jun Yong Park by decision, and outpoint + KO’ing Darren Stewart (x2) beforehand.
If this fight was happening two years ago, MAB would be like -200 here due to his reliability to out-hustle Anders, but his recent performances have been a little bit lacklustre (Hernandez ragdolled him and Chidi Njokuani folded him like a deckchair). Couple that with the fact that Anders FINALLY looks to be growing into the potential he’s always been on the cusp of with a recent change in training camp…I think you’re looking at a closely lined fight here.
I predict this one ends up being a 29-28, possibly split decision type of fight. One man has activity whilst the other has power. The subjectivity of judging will be in full effect and everyone will call this one a robbery, depending on who they bet on.
How I line this fight: Marc-Andre Barriault +100 (50%), Eryk Anders +100 (50%)
Bet or Pass: Pass
Notable Props: Barriault by Decision would probably be my preferred choice.
Jasmine Jasudavicius v Miranda Maverick
Miranda Maverick is a Women’s MMA fighter that I hold in very high regard. The back-to-back losses put a real halt to her hype train, but I think she’s easily got Top 10 potential and got robbed against Maycee Barber anyway. I think her style is one that can very easily exploit a lot of opponents in her division. Her striking’s okay, but her wrestling and top pressure are very dominant tools.
She takes on Jasmine Jasudavicius, who has also used her wrestling ability to good effect in the UFC/DWCS so far. Neither woman is a particularly good striker, and I expect this one to turn into a bit of a scramble fest pretty quickly.
Their statures have been very important factors in their grappling successes so far, but for different reasons. JJ is basically a size bully at 5’7 and will have a 4 inch height advantage once again. Maverick, on the other hand, is going to be the stronger of the two during those close quarter engagements, because she’s pretty damn jacked.
I think Maverick should be favoured overall as I think her wrestling is the superior of the two and should lead to more time in top position, but I’m definitely not keen to play her at -275. Miranda’s strengths are also her opponent’s strengths, and facing the lanky size of Jasudavicius could cause her problems when it comes to securing the initial takedowns against those long legs, or keeping safe from guard submissions or maintaining that dominant position in the first place. Also, if they do somehow end up choosing to strike for significant portions, I can’t actually guarantee that Maverick is the better on the feet (reach disadvantage plays a part too).
I do however like Maverick to win this one, but not by the confidence of the current odds. I’m expecting this one to go the distance, but I highly doubt we get a good line on it as Maverick couldn’t even finish Shanna Young last time out.
How I line this fight: Jasmine Jasudavicius +188 (35%), Miranda Maverick -188 (65%)
Bet or Pass: Pass.
Notable Props: Fight goes to decision. It's probably like -400.
Blake Bilder v Kyle Nelson
There are a couple of fights on this card where one guy is clearly more populasuccessful/in-form than their opponent, but they’re still only around -200 (Dan Ige & Mike Malott are the best examples). Blake Bilder is the third. Before I jumped into research for all three of these bouts, I was instinctively thinking that I could easily want to bet all three at -200, as that didn’t seem short enough by my initial perception of their names. I came away from Ige and Malott agreeing with the line and feeling grateful that I looked into it…but I still think Blake Bilder’s odds are providing a bit of value.
Kyle Nelson is one of those fodder guys. The UFC are keeping him around to give to prospects and home-town fighters in the hope that they can invest in the future or the event itself. Jai Herbert notched a win for Team UK against Nelson on a UFC London card, Doo Ho Choi got given a softball to get him back on track for a card that was supposed to be in South Korea. Billy Quarantillo got given Nelson to put his name on the map with a highlight reel finish..and now Blake Bilder is being presented the chance to extend his UFC record to 2-0.
Bilder’s already fought a better opponent in the UFC when he beat Shane Young in February. We saw a very high pace being set in the third round of that fight, with both men landing 100+ significant strikes across the fight and Bilder also attempting 7 takedowns. His cardio is clearly quite decent, which will immediately give him the advantage over Nelson – who has often wilted in the latter half of a fight when the pace has been hectic.
Bilder’s a very well-rounded combatant, and has great BJJ once he gets established time on top. He’s a bit of a concern defensively though, where he can be taken down and can also get caught with strikes.
Kyle Nelson, on the other hand, doesn’t really seem to know what kind of fighter he is. He’s been a brawler for all of his UFC career, but comes out to land five takedowns and is seemingly not interested in striking with a Doo Ho Choi who has questionable durability. He didn’t do much at all with those takedowns either and actually put himself in danger in R1 by insisting on grappling.
If Nelson comes out looking to wrestle Bilder, I think they’re at different levels in the grappling and Blake should be able to turn things around in his favour. If they’re striking, I am aware that Nelson’s got fight ending power, but Bilder’s been much more patient and cerebral in his last couple of fights, so I trust him to stay safe and look for his openings. We saw him reactively find a takedown off of Shane Young’s kick, and Nelson’s offense is very body kick heavy.
Overall, I just think Bilder is the better fighter in pretty much every facet of MMA except one-punch power and, as long as he doesn’t get flash KO’d, I think he rolls here. -200 isn’t quite short enough, and I expect money to come in on him between now and fight night. I’ve already got my money down, just in case.
How I line this fight: Blake Bilder -300 (75%), Kyle Nelson +300 (25%)
Bet or Pass: 5u Blake Bilder to Win (-200)
Notable Props: Bilder ITD or R3 could be interesting. I'd probably be interested in that if I didn't have a lot of exposure already.
Aiemann Zahabi v Aoriqileng
There was a time where Aiemann Zahabi was considered one of the worst guys on the roster. Crazy that the standard of UFC fighter has gotten so much worse that that statement seems ridiculous now. To be fair, Zahabi did pull off a respectable upset in beating Ricky Turcios in his last fight..but it seems to be unanimously agreed that Ricky fought like an idiot in that fight and actually beat himself.
Aoriqileng is quite explosive and clearly hits hard, but he’s a bit too keen to hunt for the KO and it hurts his minute-winning ability. Against someone like Zahabi, who is quite composed and process driven (how could you not be when Firas is your family and coach), and I see that being a pretty key part to this fight. The big moments will side with the Mongolian, but Aiemann could just put together the more cohesive performance if he doesn’t get troubled by that explosiveness.
Overall this is just a pretty low level fight between guys who don’t compete very often. I didn’t have a whole lot to say prior to watching tape, and I’ve come away feeling equally uncertain of how this one’s going to end. An easy pass when there are more active and popular fighters for us to form a stronger opinion on.
How I line this fight: I don’t really know.
Bet or Pass: Pass
Notable Props: None
Nassourdine Imavov v Chris Curtis
This one instantly feels like a pretty close fight, solely based off both men’s most recent losses. Imavov getting outstruck by Sean Strickland across 25 minutes was a bit of a shock to everyone, myself included. I expected him to lose via cardio dump, but it was actually just lesser volume, a lack of takedowns being attempted and obviously not landing anything of significance on Strickland.
It’s widely known that Chris Curtis and Sean Strickland are close training partners at Xtreme Couture, which I think makes for an added element to this fight. On six days notice, Strickland and the team managed to devise a pretty genius striking gameplan with disruptive rhythm that completely threw Imavov of. Can Chris Curtis do the same? Probably.
Curtis himself has problems of his own in the striking though, namely that his volume and output just aren’t where they often need to be. I’m not sure whether it’s the managing of his gas tank or what, but he just doesn’t seem able to commit to matching his opponent’s tempo across 15 minutes. He threw the first round away against Gastelum, and it cost him the fight. He bitched and moaned about it on Twitter, but social media’s been telling the guy what his problem is for as long as he’s been in the UFC haha.
I do suspect that there’s a little bit of recency bias on Imavov here, as the guy was a pretty well-respected prospect prior to the loss to Strickland. Some will tell you it was misplaced faith, but he certainly doesn’t have tempo issues in the latter half of fights and should probably have the higher volume across 15 minutes. I don’t see him taking Curtis down either, given the 100% takedown defence and the fact Imavov seemingly abandoned it in his last fight. It would be great if he did though!
So yeah, it’s a bit of a close one this. Off pure skillset I lean towards Imavov at like -150, but the asterisk of Curtis’ team being able to easily design a gameplan against the Frenchman gives me enough pause to not want to pick a side here. I’d be more interested in betting overs, if a decent price is available.
How I line this fight: Nassourdine Imavov -137 (58%), Chris Curtis +137 (42%)
Bet or Pass: 1.5u Fight Goes to Decision (-137 or better)
Notable Props: I think this one goes to decision at a pretty high clip.
Diana Belbita v Maria Oliveira
My initial thought was “What would compel someone to bet on this fight?”, then I remember I placed 100 quid on Chase Hooper a few weeks ago…and it was a great bet haha! Given how most of my handicapping for this card has seen me in complete agreement with the books, perhaps looking into a lower level fight with significantly less interest could be the place to a strong opinion!?
Nope. I can’t do it. One quick glance at their records was enough for me. Belbita got 30-25’d by a wrestling Molly McCann and submitted by Liana Jojua, whilst Maria Oliveira got soundly beaten on the scorecards by Vanesa Demopoulos and voluntarily asked to stop fighting after 3 minutes against Marina Rodriguez.
This one isn’t good enough to open an Apex card, let alone sit on a PPV. I usually really dislike all the WMMA bashing on this sub, but this one isn’t worth the time.
How I line this fight: No.
Bet or Pass: No.
Notable Props: No.
Live Betting Lean: You could do something productive with that 15 minutes. Lift some weights, make some food, rewatch Ngannou v Lewis instead?
Bets
0.5u Irene Aldana to Win (+300)
5u Blake Bilder to Win (-200)
1.5u Imavov v Curtis Goes to Decision (-137 or better) (Might not get this kind of price).
Parlay Do’s: Dan Ige, Blake Bilder, Imavov/Curtis GTD, Maverick/Jasudavicius GTD
Parlay Don’ts: Amanda Nunes, Mike Malott, Miranda Maverick
2023.06.04 23:01 AustralianChrono Chronologica's Drag Race Season 4: Episode 7- It's Your Festival Lip Sync
DRAG RACE!
Chronologica struts the runway wearing a cosplay of Twilight Sparkle, from my little pony.
Neigh!
Welcome to Drag Race.
Pot O’Pyrite, welcome back to the show!
“Pleasure to be back.” Pyrite grins.
Rachelle, Floss, what festival would YOU host?
“Ballroom, baby.”
“KAKITIKA KITI KA KA, OW!!!” Floss chants.
Rachelle blinks.
For our Challenge, our racers were tasked with curating their own festivals.
And on the runway, they’ll be wearing Carnival Couture looks.
It’s TIME!
~
Category is… Carnival Couture.
Dressed as the circus tent itself, Aguacate steps out in a full length, red and white striped gown. She herself is the ringleader, with a cane, top hat, and thin black mustache. At the end of the runway, she opens up her tent and invites everyone to come inside her circus!
She’s wide open.
Zazu Nova arrives in a fitted bodysuit adorned with fluffy cotton candy-like trim in a pastel pink shade, with a plunging neckline and cutouts on the sides and back. To complement the cotton candy theme, a wig made of fluffy curly pastel pink hair, decorated with cotton candy-like ornaments, sparkling glitter, and glossy lips, complete the look with a smiling Zazu.
“I’m hungry.” Floss laughs.
Yasmin struts out in a preppy white cricket player’s uniform, with white trousers, a shirt, and a knit jumper, and swings a cricket bat enthusiastically. As she finishes her swing, white Carnival feathers swoop out dramatically into wide decorative plumage, presenting the perfect combo of cricket and carnival, representative of Guyana’s Mashramani Festival.
“Ooooh….” Pyrite gasps.
In a huge plumed look in green, with a massive headdress and glistening jewels all over her body, Granny Gorgeous is ready for the festival, baby! She sambas and dances as she twirls through the stage, serving Brazilian Carnival.
“Dance, bitch!” Floss cheers.
Referencing the Italian Commedia dell'arte movement, Fiore Stravaganza enters with a face mask and a jester look, in a satin style with huge puffy sleeves. She takes off her mask to reveal a painted clown face with a smile.
“Oh, I love a Commedia dell'arte reference.” Pyrite smirks.
Jaslene Bangus has become a big top! She is a big red striped big top tent, wearing a gorgeous little mini dress that twirls along with her as she walks through the stage, with fluffy red hair and a smile upon her face.
Brittany’s back?
Showcasing a look for the Mombasa Carnival, King Omari Star wears a look of bright yellows, orange and greens, with a huge headpiece like a bird, and a bare chest that is covered in various chains. He’s got a massive cape that flows as he walks, and a huge smile.
“Cape King.” Rachelle moans.
~
Hi Racers.
This week, nobody is safe.
Starting with… Aguacate and Granny.
The two grin.
You were a chaotic duo.
“Me?” Aguacate gasps. “Chaotic?!”
And I loved it. It was fun, it was entertaining- you delivered here, and I really was happy with it.
“I had such a fun time with this.” Granny smiles. “It was a pleasure.”
Great job, the both of you.
The two grin.
Fiore and Jaslene.
The two look at each other and smile.
“I feel like this was off.” Pyrite purses his lips. “For me, it was just a crappy concept.”
Fiore sighs, visibly displeased.
“I feel as if you were just- not doing enough. Your festival, for me- it wasn’t FUN. I needed fun.” Pyrite responds.
“I do- I did enjoy this.” Jaslene smiles. “And I really enjoyed our concept, and I did think I was having fun but I get the critiques.”
Fiore Stravaganza: “I wasn’t, but werk.”
Fiore shrugs.
Next up, Crayola and Yasmin.
The two look at Chronologica.
“For me…” Floss smiles. “You two really shined tonight.”
“Woo!” Yasmin cheers. “Fantabulous.”
Floss beams. “For me, you were here, you were delivering, you had fun- the two of you, and I was most interested in your festival.”
“Thank you.” Yasmin tears up.
“You have a natural charisma- Yasmin. And this week, you embraced what we needed, Crayola. I’m proud of you both.”
Finally, Omari and Zazu.
Omari stands tall, whilst Zazu smiles.
“I think the reality is you seem… off kilter.” Rachelle says. “And yes, it was a team challenge, but the reality was Omari- you were the weaker link.”
Omari looks frustrated, as the others look at him.
…
Fiore.
Jaslene.
Aguacate.
Granny.
You are… Safe. You may untuck in the platinum lounge.
The four look surprised.
Omari, Zazu, Crayola & Yasmin. Please stand on stage for further critique.
~
Fiore, Jaslene, Granny and Aguacate enter the werkroom.
“Safety!” Aguacate chuckles, grabbing her drink.
Fiore grabs a cocktail. “Yay.”
The four sit down.
“This was interesting.” Granny says.
Aguacate takes a sip of her drink and nods. "Definitely interesting. I didn't expect Omari and Zazu to end up in the bottom. They're usually strong competitors. I mean, Omari is. Zazu is pretty, though." Aguacate giggles.
Fiore rolls her eyes. "Pretty ugly maybe. Well, I'm not surprised. Omari has been struggling lately, and Zazu is just… fat to cut at this point. They deserved to be in the bottom."
“Omari seemed… pissed.” Jaslene adds.
“Oh, he was MAD.” Aguacate giggles.
Fiore takes a sip of her cocktail. "Well, it's about time Omari was challenged. I feel like he’s been coasting, so…”
Jaslene nods, taking out her hand to hold Fiore, who shakes her head. “I’m good.”
Jaslene frowns.
Granny sighs and shakes her head. "I don't like seeing anyone upset, darlings. Drag Race is a tough competition, and emotions can run high. Let's hope they both handle it with grace."
Fiore giggles, before sipping her drink.
Aguacate chuckles. "Fiore, always a tough critic. But hey, it's part of what makes you fierce.”
“Exactly.” Fiore nods. “I'm simply stating the facts. Drag Race is not a place for weak links, and I have no patience for those who can't keep up."
Jaslene Bangus: “Fiore isn’t talking about me, is it? Out of nowhere, she’s suddenly acting… colder.”
"So, what do we think about the upcoming lip sync? Any predictions?" Granny smiles.
Granny raises an eyebrow. "Hmm, it's hard to say. Both Omari and Zazu are fierce performers. I wouldn't be surprised if they bring the house down."
Aguacate smirks. "I have a feeling Omari is going to fight tooth and nail to stay. He's got that fire in him. It'll be an intense lip sync."
Jaslene nods. "Yeah, I can see that. But Zazu is no slouch either. She knows how to captivate an audience. It'll be a battle of fierce personalities."
“I think Omari is going to decimate that girl verbally.” Fiore adds. “I see them fighting.”
“Oh, they’ve already fought before, and..” Granny sighs.
Jaslene shrugs. “I mean, I just hope I’m in the room when it happens.”
Fiore smirks.
“Okay, let’s get drunk!” Aguacate yells, grabbing shot glasses. “TEQUILA!”
~
I want to talk further, and really analyze your performances.
Starting with… Crayola.
Crayola grins.
“I am really happy to have seen you going outside of your shell.” Rachelle nods. “Really commendable.”
“Thank you.” Crayola nods with a grin.
“You played the part of the straight man, and I think that was a fun choice.” Rachelle purses her lips. “But it did mean Yasmin was the more BRIGHT personality.”
Crayola nods.
Zazu.
“Hiya!” Zazu smiles.
I really do like your energy, Zazu. I feel like it’s a real positive and bright energy.
Zazu grins.
But I do want you to keep PUSHING yourself. I need a little more, and I do feel as if yes, you were in many ways brought down by your partner…
Omari looks over.
But, alternatively you struggled and have been struggling. I just… want to see you push it.
Zazu nods.
Yasmin.
Yasmin grins.
“It was a pleasure seeing you this week.” Pyrite says with a grin. “You were charming, you were fun, you were the highlight for me.”
Crayola looks over.
“Wow, I am so ever so pleased.” Yasmin beams.
“It was just- a simply put, masterclass in hosting.” Pyrite nods. “Well done.”
“Thank you.” Yasmin nods.
Omari.
“Baby.” Floss sighs. “This was a disappointing week, for me.”
“Okay.” Omari says. “I can see that.”
“You just- I saw you trying, but it didn’t come across authentic. I was wanting you to loosen up. Did you come up with this concept?” Floss asks.
King Omari Star: “Part of me wants to decimate Zazu on the stage. But…”
“It was a team effort.” Omari responds. “And I want to take accountability for MY performance- because yes, I didn’t meet the mark.”
Floss nods. “I want to see you shine, baby. You’re here to fight. Show it, but let yourself roll with these punches.”
Omari looks down and nods. “Thank you.”
Thanks, racers. Whilst we deliberate, you may untuck backstage in the Crystal Lounge, sponsored by Princess Papaya Tropical Drinks.
~
The four enter the Crystal lounge.
“Where’s my fabulous drink?” Yasmin smiles, grabbing her non-alcoholic drink.
The four sit down.
“So….” Crayola purses her lips. “How do we think we’re placing?”
“Clearly, we’re in the bottom.” Omari looks over at Zazu.
Zazu looks nervously for a second, before nodding.
“How do you feel about that, Omari?” Yasmin asks.
Yasmin Raiz: “He’s… a strong character. And I expect him to probably go at Zazu. I mean, Zazu looks it.”
Zazu looks at Omari.
Omari takes a deep breath and looks directly at Zazu. "I've been doing a lot of thinking lately. These… critiques." Omari begins. "And I realize that instead of being angry and frustrated, I should be using this opportunity to learn and grow. We're both here because we love drag, and we want to show the world what we're capable of. So, instead of dwelling on our flaws, let's embrace them and use them as fuel to give the performance of our lives in the lip sync."
Zazu's eyes widen in surprise, both she nods.
"You're right, Omari. Let's show them the fire that burns within us and give them a lip sync they'll never forget!" Zazu smiles. “I know we didn’t work it out, this week-”
“And I know that is a lot due to myself.” Omari nods. “So I own that.”
“It was me too.” Zazu responds. “But we’re both performers.”
“I live for the stage.” Omari lights up. “And it’s not something I fear, it’s an opportunity.”
“I think the same.” Zazu nods.
"Absolutely! You two have incredible talent, and I have no doubt that you can deliver an unforgettable performance. Just remember, it's not about being perfect; it's about showing your passion and giving it your all." Yasmin responds with a bright grin.
"I've been worried about this challenge, but seeing you two find strength in each other has inspired me. We're all in this together, and we can lift each other up." Crayola adds.
The others walk in, as the four look at each other.
“Oh, not a fight.” Jaslene chuckles.
“Why, were you worried?” Yasmin asks.
“Should we go prepare?” Omari looks at Zazu, who nods.
“I think it’ll be judged individually, and I am so happy to be here, but… I don’t feel like I did as good as you! You just have that… more crowd pleasing personality.” Crayola says with a smile.
Yasmin makes a face, before nodding.
Yasmin Raiz: “Is she shading myself?”
“I mean that with love, my dear.” Crayola adds. “You did fantastic.”
“Thanks.” Yasmin grins.
“Crayola, you really do remind me of what people think of teachers.” Jaslene smiles.
“Thank you.” Crayola grins.
Jaslene smirks.
Zazu turns to Omari with a smile. “Can we hug?”
Omari looks at Zazu. “...Do we have to?”
“We don’t.” Zazu chuckles. “I just want to fight here. Because… I do want this.” Zazu tears up. “My journey here has been challenging, but I love to perform. I love delivering these looks and you know, I see I am doing bad. But my parents- and my drag family, I know they have faith in me.”
“I think you’re a talent.” Omari responds, before exhaling. “I love drag with all my heart, and I want to show the world the passion that drives me. This lip sync is not just about staying in the competition; it's about reclaiming my power and reminding myself why I fell in love with drag in the first place."
“Heck yeah.” Zazu grins.
~
Welcome back, racers. I’ve made my decision.
Crayola Boxx, this week, you worked hard, and brought the spice.
Yasmin, we’re eating YOU UP!
Condragulations, you are BOTH the winner of this week’s challenge.
They smile, with Crayola looking particularly surprised.
Yasmin Raiz: “My WIN!!!” Yasmin cheers.
That means Zazu Nova and King Omari Star, I’m sorry my dears, but you are up for elimination.
The two look at each other.
The time has come… for you to lip sync to your life!
**Livin’ La Vida Loca by Ricky Martin starts to play**
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CN5hQOI\_\_10
Good luck… and don’t fuck it up!
Zazu Nova: “I know this is another week in the bottom. But I love to perform. This is my heart and soul, and I’m going to show it.”
King Omari Star: “It’s time to live La Vida Loca, baby.” Omari smirks.
~
Next Time!
“Racers, it’s time for an IMPROV CHALLENGE!” Rachelle Mirage cheers.
Aguacate gasps.
“I’m stuck in this house…” Granny looks around.
Fiore Stravaganza: “Real talk, it’s time we’re over.”
“A.E Girls?” Jaslene winks.
“Meh.” Fiore responds.
~
Stats
Voting
Spreadsheet
submitted by AustralianChrono to ChronologicasDragRace [link] [comments]
Chronologica struts the runway wearing a cosplay of Twilight Sparkle, from my little pony.
Neigh!
Welcome to Drag Race.
Pot O’Pyrite, welcome back to the show!
“Pleasure to be back.” Pyrite grins.
Rachelle, Floss, what festival would YOU host?
“Ballroom, baby.”
“KAKITIKA KITI KA KA, OW!!!” Floss chants.
Rachelle blinks.
For our Challenge, our racers were tasked with curating their own festivals.
And on the runway, they’ll be wearing Carnival Couture looks.
It’s TIME!
~
Category is… Carnival Couture.
Dressed as the circus tent itself, Aguacate steps out in a full length, red and white striped gown. She herself is the ringleader, with a cane, top hat, and thin black mustache. At the end of the runway, she opens up her tent and invites everyone to come inside her circus!
She’s wide open.
Zazu Nova arrives in a fitted bodysuit adorned with fluffy cotton candy-like trim in a pastel pink shade, with a plunging neckline and cutouts on the sides and back. To complement the cotton candy theme, a wig made of fluffy curly pastel pink hair, decorated with cotton candy-like ornaments, sparkling glitter, and glossy lips, complete the look with a smiling Zazu.
“I’m hungry.” Floss laughs.
Yasmin struts out in a preppy white cricket player’s uniform, with white trousers, a shirt, and a knit jumper, and swings a cricket bat enthusiastically. As she finishes her swing, white Carnival feathers swoop out dramatically into wide decorative plumage, presenting the perfect combo of cricket and carnival, representative of Guyana’s Mashramani Festival.
“Ooooh….” Pyrite gasps.
In a huge plumed look in green, with a massive headdress and glistening jewels all over her body, Granny Gorgeous is ready for the festival, baby! She sambas and dances as she twirls through the stage, serving Brazilian Carnival.
“Dance, bitch!” Floss cheers.
Referencing the Italian Commedia dell'arte movement, Fiore Stravaganza enters with a face mask and a jester look, in a satin style with huge puffy sleeves. She takes off her mask to reveal a painted clown face with a smile.
“Oh, I love a Commedia dell'arte reference.” Pyrite smirks.
Jaslene Bangus has become a big top! She is a big red striped big top tent, wearing a gorgeous little mini dress that twirls along with her as she walks through the stage, with fluffy red hair and a smile upon her face.
Brittany’s back?
Showcasing a look for the Mombasa Carnival, King Omari Star wears a look of bright yellows, orange and greens, with a huge headpiece like a bird, and a bare chest that is covered in various chains. He’s got a massive cape that flows as he walks, and a huge smile.
“Cape King.” Rachelle moans.
~
Hi Racers.
This week, nobody is safe.
Starting with… Aguacate and Granny.
The two grin.
You were a chaotic duo.
“Me?” Aguacate gasps. “Chaotic?!”
And I loved it. It was fun, it was entertaining- you delivered here, and I really was happy with it.
“I had such a fun time with this.” Granny smiles. “It was a pleasure.”
Great job, the both of you.
The two grin.
Fiore and Jaslene.
The two look at each other and smile.
“I feel like this was off.” Pyrite purses his lips. “For me, it was just a crappy concept.”
Fiore sighs, visibly displeased.
“I feel as if you were just- not doing enough. Your festival, for me- it wasn’t FUN. I needed fun.” Pyrite responds.
“I do- I did enjoy this.” Jaslene smiles. “And I really enjoyed our concept, and I did think I was having fun but I get the critiques.”
Fiore Stravaganza: “I wasn’t, but werk.”
Fiore shrugs.
Next up, Crayola and Yasmin.
The two look at Chronologica.
“For me…” Floss smiles. “You two really shined tonight.”
“Woo!” Yasmin cheers. “Fantabulous.”
Floss beams. “For me, you were here, you were delivering, you had fun- the two of you, and I was most interested in your festival.”
“Thank you.” Yasmin tears up.
“You have a natural charisma- Yasmin. And this week, you embraced what we needed, Crayola. I’m proud of you both.”
Finally, Omari and Zazu.
Omari stands tall, whilst Zazu smiles.
“I think the reality is you seem… off kilter.” Rachelle says. “And yes, it was a team challenge, but the reality was Omari- you were the weaker link.”
Omari looks frustrated, as the others look at him.
…
Fiore.
Jaslene.
Aguacate.
Granny.
You are… Safe. You may untuck in the platinum lounge.
The four look surprised.
Omari, Zazu, Crayola & Yasmin. Please stand on stage for further critique.
~
Fiore, Jaslene, Granny and Aguacate enter the werkroom.
“Safety!” Aguacate chuckles, grabbing her drink.
Fiore grabs a cocktail. “Yay.”
The four sit down.
“This was interesting.” Granny says.
Aguacate takes a sip of her drink and nods. "Definitely interesting. I didn't expect Omari and Zazu to end up in the bottom. They're usually strong competitors. I mean, Omari is. Zazu is pretty, though." Aguacate giggles.
Fiore rolls her eyes. "Pretty ugly maybe. Well, I'm not surprised. Omari has been struggling lately, and Zazu is just… fat to cut at this point. They deserved to be in the bottom."
“Omari seemed… pissed.” Jaslene adds.
“Oh, he was MAD.” Aguacate giggles.
Fiore takes a sip of her cocktail. "Well, it's about time Omari was challenged. I feel like he’s been coasting, so…”
Jaslene nods, taking out her hand to hold Fiore, who shakes her head. “I’m good.”
Jaslene frowns.
Granny sighs and shakes her head. "I don't like seeing anyone upset, darlings. Drag Race is a tough competition, and emotions can run high. Let's hope they both handle it with grace."
Fiore giggles, before sipping her drink.
Aguacate chuckles. "Fiore, always a tough critic. But hey, it's part of what makes you fierce.”
“Exactly.” Fiore nods. “I'm simply stating the facts. Drag Race is not a place for weak links, and I have no patience for those who can't keep up."
Jaslene Bangus: “Fiore isn’t talking about me, is it? Out of nowhere, she’s suddenly acting… colder.”
"So, what do we think about the upcoming lip sync? Any predictions?" Granny smiles.
Granny raises an eyebrow. "Hmm, it's hard to say. Both Omari and Zazu are fierce performers. I wouldn't be surprised if they bring the house down."
Aguacate smirks. "I have a feeling Omari is going to fight tooth and nail to stay. He's got that fire in him. It'll be an intense lip sync."
Jaslene nods. "Yeah, I can see that. But Zazu is no slouch either. She knows how to captivate an audience. It'll be a battle of fierce personalities."
“I think Omari is going to decimate that girl verbally.” Fiore adds. “I see them fighting.”
“Oh, they’ve already fought before, and..” Granny sighs.
Jaslene shrugs. “I mean, I just hope I’m in the room when it happens.”
Fiore smirks.
“Okay, let’s get drunk!” Aguacate yells, grabbing shot glasses. “TEQUILA!”
~
I want to talk further, and really analyze your performances.
Starting with… Crayola.
Crayola grins.
“I am really happy to have seen you going outside of your shell.” Rachelle nods. “Really commendable.”
“Thank you.” Crayola nods with a grin.
“You played the part of the straight man, and I think that was a fun choice.” Rachelle purses her lips. “But it did mean Yasmin was the more BRIGHT personality.”
Crayola nods.
Zazu.
“Hiya!” Zazu smiles.
I really do like your energy, Zazu. I feel like it’s a real positive and bright energy.
Zazu grins.
But I do want you to keep PUSHING yourself. I need a little more, and I do feel as if yes, you were in many ways brought down by your partner…
Omari looks over.
But, alternatively you struggled and have been struggling. I just… want to see you push it.
Zazu nods.
Yasmin.
Yasmin grins.
“It was a pleasure seeing you this week.” Pyrite says with a grin. “You were charming, you were fun, you were the highlight for me.”
Crayola looks over.
“Wow, I am so ever so pleased.” Yasmin beams.
“It was just- a simply put, masterclass in hosting.” Pyrite nods. “Well done.”
“Thank you.” Yasmin nods.
Omari.
“Baby.” Floss sighs. “This was a disappointing week, for me.”
“Okay.” Omari says. “I can see that.”
“You just- I saw you trying, but it didn’t come across authentic. I was wanting you to loosen up. Did you come up with this concept?” Floss asks.
King Omari Star: “Part of me wants to decimate Zazu on the stage. But…”
“It was a team effort.” Omari responds. “And I want to take accountability for MY performance- because yes, I didn’t meet the mark.”
Floss nods. “I want to see you shine, baby. You’re here to fight. Show it, but let yourself roll with these punches.”
Omari looks down and nods. “Thank you.”
Thanks, racers. Whilst we deliberate, you may untuck backstage in the Crystal Lounge, sponsored by Princess Papaya Tropical Drinks.
~
The four enter the Crystal lounge.
“Where’s my fabulous drink?” Yasmin smiles, grabbing her non-alcoholic drink.
The four sit down.
“So….” Crayola purses her lips. “How do we think we’re placing?”
“Clearly, we’re in the bottom.” Omari looks over at Zazu.
Zazu looks nervously for a second, before nodding.
“How do you feel about that, Omari?” Yasmin asks.
Yasmin Raiz: “He’s… a strong character. And I expect him to probably go at Zazu. I mean, Zazu looks it.”
Zazu looks at Omari.
Omari takes a deep breath and looks directly at Zazu. "I've been doing a lot of thinking lately. These… critiques." Omari begins. "And I realize that instead of being angry and frustrated, I should be using this opportunity to learn and grow. We're both here because we love drag, and we want to show the world what we're capable of. So, instead of dwelling on our flaws, let's embrace them and use them as fuel to give the performance of our lives in the lip sync."
Zazu's eyes widen in surprise, both she nods.
"You're right, Omari. Let's show them the fire that burns within us and give them a lip sync they'll never forget!" Zazu smiles. “I know we didn’t work it out, this week-”
“And I know that is a lot due to myself.” Omari nods. “So I own that.”
“It was me too.” Zazu responds. “But we’re both performers.”
“I live for the stage.” Omari lights up. “And it’s not something I fear, it’s an opportunity.”
“I think the same.” Zazu nods.
"Absolutely! You two have incredible talent, and I have no doubt that you can deliver an unforgettable performance. Just remember, it's not about being perfect; it's about showing your passion and giving it your all." Yasmin responds with a bright grin.
"I've been worried about this challenge, but seeing you two find strength in each other has inspired me. We're all in this together, and we can lift each other up." Crayola adds.
The others walk in, as the four look at each other.
“Oh, not a fight.” Jaslene chuckles.
“Why, were you worried?” Yasmin asks.
“Should we go prepare?” Omari looks at Zazu, who nods.
“I think it’ll be judged individually, and I am so happy to be here, but… I don’t feel like I did as good as you! You just have that… more crowd pleasing personality.” Crayola says with a smile.
Yasmin makes a face, before nodding.
Yasmin Raiz: “Is she shading myself?”
“I mean that with love, my dear.” Crayola adds. “You did fantastic.”
“Thanks.” Yasmin grins.
“Crayola, you really do remind me of what people think of teachers.” Jaslene smiles.
“Thank you.” Crayola grins.
Jaslene smirks.
Zazu turns to Omari with a smile. “Can we hug?”
Omari looks at Zazu. “...Do we have to?”
“We don’t.” Zazu chuckles. “I just want to fight here. Because… I do want this.” Zazu tears up. “My journey here has been challenging, but I love to perform. I love delivering these looks and you know, I see I am doing bad. But my parents- and my drag family, I know they have faith in me.”
“I think you’re a talent.” Omari responds, before exhaling. “I love drag with all my heart, and I want to show the world the passion that drives me. This lip sync is not just about staying in the competition; it's about reclaiming my power and reminding myself why I fell in love with drag in the first place."
“Heck yeah.” Zazu grins.
~
Welcome back, racers. I’ve made my decision.
Crayola Boxx, this week, you worked hard, and brought the spice.
Yasmin, we’re eating YOU UP!
Condragulations, you are BOTH the winner of this week’s challenge.
They smile, with Crayola looking particularly surprised.
Yasmin Raiz: “My WIN!!!” Yasmin cheers.
That means Zazu Nova and King Omari Star, I’m sorry my dears, but you are up for elimination.
The two look at each other.
The time has come… for you to lip sync to your life!
**Livin’ La Vida Loca by Ricky Martin starts to play**
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CN5hQOI\_\_10
Good luck… and don’t fuck it up!
Zazu Nova: “I know this is another week in the bottom. But I love to perform. This is my heart and soul, and I’m going to show it.”
King Omari Star: “It’s time to live La Vida Loca, baby.” Omari smirks.
~
Next Time!
“Racers, it’s time for an IMPROV CHALLENGE!” Rachelle Mirage cheers.
Aguacate gasps.
“I’m stuck in this house…” Granny looks around.
Fiore Stravaganza: “Real talk, it’s time we’re over.”
“A.E Girls?” Jaslene winks.
“Meh.” Fiore responds.
~
Stats
Voting
Spreadsheet
2023.06.04 23:01 AustralianChrono Chronologica's Drag Race Season 4: Episode 7- It's Your Festival Lip Sync
DRAG RACE!
Chronologica struts the runway wearing a cosplay of Twilight Sparkle, from my little pony.
Neigh!
Welcome to Drag Race.
Pot O’Pyrite, welcome back to the show!
“Pleasure to be back.” Pyrite grins.
Rachelle, Floss, what festival would YOU host?
“Ballroom, baby.”
“KAKITIKA KITI KA KA, OW!!!” Floss chants.
Rachelle blinks.
For our Challenge, our racers were tasked with curating their own festivals.
And on the runway, they’ll be wearing Carnival Couture looks.
It’s TIME!
~
Category is… Carnival Couture.
Dressed as the circus tent itself, Aguacate steps out in a full length, red and white striped gown. She herself is the ringleader, with a cane, top hat, and thin black mustache. At the end of the runway, she opens up her tent and invites everyone to come inside her circus!
She’s wide open.
Zazu Nova arrives in a fitted bodysuit adorned with fluffy cotton candy-like trim in a pastel pink shade, with a plunging neckline and cutouts on the sides and back. To complement the cotton candy theme, a wig made of fluffy curly pastel pink hair, decorated with cotton candy-like ornaments, sparkling glitter, and glossy lips, complete the look with a smiling Zazu.
“I’m hungry.” Floss laughs.
Yasmin struts out in a preppy white cricket player’s uniform, with white trousers, a shirt, and a knit jumper, and swings a cricket bat enthusiastically. As she finishes her swing, white Carnival feathers swoop out dramatically into wide decorative plumage, presenting the perfect combo of cricket and carnival, representative of Guyana’s Mashramani Festival.
“Ooooh….” Pyrite gasps.
In a huge plumed look in green, with a massive headdress and glistening jewels all over her body, Granny Gorgeous is ready for the festival, baby! She sambas and dances as she twirls through the stage, serving Brazilian Carnival.
“Dance, bitch!” Floss cheers.
Referencing the Italian Commedia dell'arte movement, Fiore Stravaganza enters with a face mask and a jester look, in a satin style with huge puffy sleeves. She takes off her mask to reveal a painted clown face with a smile.
“Oh, I love a Commedia dell'arte reference.” Pyrite smirks.
Jaslene Bangus has become a big top! She is a big red striped big top tent, wearing a gorgeous little mini dress that twirls along with her as she walks through the stage, with fluffy red hair and a smile upon her face.
Brittany’s back?
Showcasing a look for the Mombasa Carnival, King Omari Star wears a look of bright yellows, orange and greens, with a huge headpiece like a bird, and a bare chest that is covered in various chains. He’s got a massive cape that flows as he walks, and a huge smile.
“Cape King.” Rachelle moans.
~
Hi Racers.
This week, nobody is safe.
Starting with… Aguacate and Granny.
The two grin.
You were a chaotic duo.
“Me?” Aguacate gasps. “Chaotic?!”
And I loved it. It was fun, it was entertaining- you delivered here, and I really was happy with it.
“I had such a fun time with this.” Granny smiles. “It was a pleasure.”
Great job, the both of you.
The two grin.
Fiore and Jaslene.
The two look at each other and smile.
“I feel like this was off.” Pyrite purses his lips. “For me, it was just a crappy concept.”
Fiore sighs, visibly displeased.
“I feel as if you were just- not doing enough. Your festival, for me- it wasn’t FUN. I needed fun.” Pyrite responds.
“I do- I did enjoy this.” Jaslene smiles. “And I really enjoyed our concept, and I did think I was having fun but I get the critiques.”
Fiore Stravaganza: “I wasn’t, but werk.”
Fiore shrugs.
Next up, Crayola and Yasmin.
The two look at Chronologica.
“For me…” Floss smiles. “You two really shined tonight.”
“Woo!” Yasmin cheers. “Fantabulous.”
Floss beams. “For me, you were here, you were delivering, you had fun- the two of you, and I was most interested in your festival.”
“Thank you.” Yasmin tears up.
“You have a natural charisma- Yasmin. And this week, you embraced what we needed, Crayola. I’m proud of you both.”
Finally, Omari and Zazu.
Omari stands tall, whilst Zazu smiles.
“I think the reality is you seem… off kilter.” Rachelle says. “And yes, it was a team challenge, but the reality was Omari- you were the weaker link.”
Omari looks frustrated, as the others look at him.
…
Fiore.
Jaslene.
Aguacate.
Granny.
You are… Safe. You may untuck in the platinum lounge.
The four look surprised.
Omari, Zazu, Crayola & Yasmin. Please stand on stage for further critique.
~
Fiore, Jaslene, Granny and Aguacate enter the werkroom.
“Safety!” Aguacate chuckles, grabbing her drink.
Fiore grabs a cocktail. “Yay.”
The four sit down.
“This was interesting.” Granny says.
Aguacate takes a sip of her drink and nods. "Definitely interesting. I didn't expect Omari and Zazu to end up in the bottom. They're usually strong competitors. I mean, Omari is. Zazu is pretty, though." Aguacate giggles.
Fiore rolls her eyes. "Pretty ugly maybe. Well, I'm not surprised. Omari has been struggling lately, and Zazu is just… fat to cut at this point. They deserved to be in the bottom."
“Omari seemed… pissed.” Jaslene adds.
“Oh, he was MAD.” Aguacate giggles.
Fiore takes a sip of her cocktail. "Well, it's about time Omari was challenged. I feel like he’s been coasting, so…”
Jaslene nods, taking out her hand to hold Fiore, who shakes her head. “I’m good.”
Jaslene frowns.
Granny sighs and shakes her head. "I don't like seeing anyone upset, darlings. Drag Race is a tough competition, and emotions can run high. Let's hope they both handle it with grace."
Fiore giggles, before sipping her drink.
Aguacate chuckles. "Fiore, always a tough critic. But hey, it's part of what makes you fierce.”
“Exactly.” Fiore nods. “I'm simply stating the facts. Drag Race is not a place for weak links, and I have no patience for those who can't keep up."
Jaslene Bangus: “Fiore isn’t talking about me, is it? Out of nowhere, she’s suddenly acting… colder.”
"So, what do we think about the upcoming lip sync? Any predictions?" Granny smiles.
Granny raises an eyebrow. "Hmm, it's hard to say. Both Omari and Zazu are fierce performers. I wouldn't be surprised if they bring the house down."
Aguacate smirks. "I have a feeling Omari is going to fight tooth and nail to stay. He's got that fire in him. It'll be an intense lip sync."
Jaslene nods. "Yeah, I can see that. But Zazu is no slouch either. She knows how to captivate an audience. It'll be a battle of fierce personalities."
“I think Omari is going to decimate that girl verbally.” Fiore adds. “I see them fighting.”
“Oh, they’ve already fought before, and..” Granny sighs.
Jaslene shrugs. “I mean, I just hope I’m in the room when it happens.”
Fiore smirks.
“Okay, let’s get drunk!” Aguacate yells, grabbing shot glasses. “TEQUILA!”
~
I want to talk further, and really analyze your performances.
Starting with… Crayola.
Crayola grins.
“I am really happy to have seen you going outside of your shell.” Rachelle nods. “Really commendable.”
“Thank you.” Crayola nods with a grin.
“You played the part of the straight man, and I think that was a fun choice.” Rachelle purses her lips. “But it did mean Yasmin was the more BRIGHT personality.”
Crayola nods.
Zazu.
“Hiya!” Zazu smiles.
I really do like your energy, Zazu. I feel like it’s a real positive and bright energy.
Zazu grins.
But I do want you to keep PUSHING yourself. I need a little more, and I do feel as if yes, you were in many ways brought down by your partner…
Omari looks over.
But, alternatively you struggled and have been struggling. I just… want to see you push it.
Zazu nods.
Yasmin.
Yasmin grins.
“It was a pleasure seeing you this week.” Pyrite says with a grin. “You were charming, you were fun, you were the highlight for me.”
Crayola looks over.
“Wow, I am so ever so pleased.” Yasmin beams.
“It was just- a simply put, masterclass in hosting.” Pyrite nods. “Well done.”
“Thank you.” Yasmin nods.
Omari.
“Baby.” Floss sighs. “This was a disappointing week, for me.”
“Okay.” Omari says. “I can see that.”
“You just- I saw you trying, but it didn’t come across authentic. I was wanting you to loosen up. Did you come up with this concept?” Floss asks.
King Omari Star: “Part of me wants to decimate Zazu on the stage. But…”
“It was a team effort.” Omari responds. “And I want to take accountability for MY performance- because yes, I didn’t meet the mark.”
Floss nods. “I want to see you shine, baby. You’re here to fight. Show it, but let yourself roll with these punches.”
Omari looks down and nods. “Thank you.”
Thanks, racers. Whilst we deliberate, you may untuck backstage in the Crystal Lounge, sponsored by Princess Papaya Tropical Drinks.
~
The four enter the Crystal lounge.
“Where’s my fabulous drink?” Yasmin smiles, grabbing her non-alcoholic drink.
The four sit down.
“So….” Crayola purses her lips. “How do we think we’re placing?”
“Clearly, we’re in the bottom.” Omari looks over at Zazu.
Zazu looks nervously for a second, before nodding.
“How do you feel about that, Omari?” Yasmin asks.
Yasmin Raiz: “He’s… a strong character. And I expect him to probably go at Zazu. I mean, Zazu looks it.”
Zazu looks at Omari.
Omari takes a deep breath and looks directly at Zazu. "I've been doing a lot of thinking lately. These… critiques." Omari begins. "And I realize that instead of being angry and frustrated, I should be using this opportunity to learn and grow. We're both here because we love drag, and we want to show the world what we're capable of. So, instead of dwelling on our flaws, let's embrace them and use them as fuel to give the performance of our lives in the lip sync."
Zazu's eyes widen in surprise, both she nods.
"You're right, Omari. Let's show them the fire that burns within us and give them a lip sync they'll never forget!" Zazu smiles. “I know we didn’t work it out, this week-”
“And I know that is a lot due to myself.” Omari nods. “So I own that.”
“It was me too.” Zazu responds. “But we’re both performers.”
“I live for the stage.” Omari lights up. “And it’s not something I fear, it’s an opportunity.”
“I think the same.” Zazu nods.
"Absolutely! You two have incredible talent, and I have no doubt that you can deliver an unforgettable performance. Just remember, it's not about being perfect; it's about showing your passion and giving it your all." Yasmin responds with a bright grin.
"I've been worried about this challenge, but seeing you two find strength in each other has inspired me. We're all in this together, and we can lift each other up." Crayola adds.
The others walk in, as the four look at each other.
“Oh, not a fight.” Jaslene chuckles.
“Why, were you worried?” Yasmin asks.
“Should we go prepare?” Omari looks at Zazu, who nods.
“I think it’ll be judged individually, and I am so happy to be here, but… I don’t feel like I did as good as you! You just have that… more crowd pleasing personality.” Crayola says with a smile.
Yasmin makes a face, before nodding.
Yasmin Raiz: “Is she shading myself?”
“I mean that with love, my dear.” Crayola adds. “You did fantastic.”
“Thanks.” Yasmin grins.
“Crayola, you really do remind me of what people think of teachers.” Jaslene smiles.
“Thank you.” Crayola grins.
Jaslene smirks.
Zazu turns to Omari with a smile. “Can we hug?”
Omari looks at Zazu. “...Do we have to?”
“We don’t.” Zazu chuckles. “I just want to fight here. Because… I do want this.” Zazu tears up. “My journey here has been challenging, but I love to perform. I love delivering these looks and you know, I see I am doing bad. But my parents- and my drag family, I know they have faith in me.”
“I think you’re a talent.” Omari responds, before exhaling. “I love drag with all my heart, and I want to show the world the passion that drives me. This lip sync is not just about staying in the competition; it's about reclaiming my power and reminding myself why I fell in love with drag in the first place."
“Heck yeah.” Zazu grins.
~
Welcome back, racers. I’ve made my decision.
Crayola Boxx, this week, you worked hard, and brought the spice.
Yasmin, we’re eating YOU UP!
Condragulations, you are BOTH the winner of this week’s challenge.
They smile, with Crayola looking particularly surprised.
Yasmin Raiz: “My WIN!!!” Yasmin cheers.
That means Zazu Nova and King Omari Star, I’m sorry my dears, but you are up for elimination.
The two look at each other.
The time has come… for you to lip sync to your life!
**Livin’ La Vida Loca by Ricky Martin starts to play**
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CN5hQOI\_\_10
Good luck… and don’t fuck it up!
Zazu Nova: “I know this is another week in the bottom. But I love to perform. This is my heart and soul, and I’m going to show it.”
King Omari Star: “It’s time to live La Vida Loca, baby.” Omari smirks.
~
Next Time!
“Racers, it’s time for an IMPROV CHALLENGE!” Rachelle Mirage cheers.
Aguacate gasps.
“I’m stuck in this house…” Granny looks around.
Fiore Stravaganza: “Real talk, it’s time we’re over.”
“A.E Girls?” Jaslene winks.
“Meh.” Fiore responds.
~
Stats
Voting
Spreadsheet
submitted by AustralianChrono to RPDRfantasyseason [link] [comments]
Chronologica struts the runway wearing a cosplay of Twilight Sparkle, from my little pony.
Neigh!
Welcome to Drag Race.
Pot O’Pyrite, welcome back to the show!
“Pleasure to be back.” Pyrite grins.
Rachelle, Floss, what festival would YOU host?
“Ballroom, baby.”
“KAKITIKA KITI KA KA, OW!!!” Floss chants.
Rachelle blinks.
For our Challenge, our racers were tasked with curating their own festivals.
And on the runway, they’ll be wearing Carnival Couture looks.
It’s TIME!
~
Category is… Carnival Couture.
Dressed as the circus tent itself, Aguacate steps out in a full length, red and white striped gown. She herself is the ringleader, with a cane, top hat, and thin black mustache. At the end of the runway, she opens up her tent and invites everyone to come inside her circus!
She’s wide open.
Zazu Nova arrives in a fitted bodysuit adorned with fluffy cotton candy-like trim in a pastel pink shade, with a plunging neckline and cutouts on the sides and back. To complement the cotton candy theme, a wig made of fluffy curly pastel pink hair, decorated with cotton candy-like ornaments, sparkling glitter, and glossy lips, complete the look with a smiling Zazu.
“I’m hungry.” Floss laughs.
Yasmin struts out in a preppy white cricket player’s uniform, with white trousers, a shirt, and a knit jumper, and swings a cricket bat enthusiastically. As she finishes her swing, white Carnival feathers swoop out dramatically into wide decorative plumage, presenting the perfect combo of cricket and carnival, representative of Guyana’s Mashramani Festival.
“Ooooh….” Pyrite gasps.
In a huge plumed look in green, with a massive headdress and glistening jewels all over her body, Granny Gorgeous is ready for the festival, baby! She sambas and dances as she twirls through the stage, serving Brazilian Carnival.
“Dance, bitch!” Floss cheers.
Referencing the Italian Commedia dell'arte movement, Fiore Stravaganza enters with a face mask and a jester look, in a satin style with huge puffy sleeves. She takes off her mask to reveal a painted clown face with a smile.
“Oh, I love a Commedia dell'arte reference.” Pyrite smirks.
Jaslene Bangus has become a big top! She is a big red striped big top tent, wearing a gorgeous little mini dress that twirls along with her as she walks through the stage, with fluffy red hair and a smile upon her face.
Brittany’s back?
Showcasing a look for the Mombasa Carnival, King Omari Star wears a look of bright yellows, orange and greens, with a huge headpiece like a bird, and a bare chest that is covered in various chains. He’s got a massive cape that flows as he walks, and a huge smile.
“Cape King.” Rachelle moans.
~
Hi Racers.
This week, nobody is safe.
Starting with… Aguacate and Granny.
The two grin.
You were a chaotic duo.
“Me?” Aguacate gasps. “Chaotic?!”
And I loved it. It was fun, it was entertaining- you delivered here, and I really was happy with it.
“I had such a fun time with this.” Granny smiles. “It was a pleasure.”
Great job, the both of you.
The two grin.
Fiore and Jaslene.
The two look at each other and smile.
“I feel like this was off.” Pyrite purses his lips. “For me, it was just a crappy concept.”
Fiore sighs, visibly displeased.
“I feel as if you were just- not doing enough. Your festival, for me- it wasn’t FUN. I needed fun.” Pyrite responds.
“I do- I did enjoy this.” Jaslene smiles. “And I really enjoyed our concept, and I did think I was having fun but I get the critiques.”
Fiore Stravaganza: “I wasn’t, but werk.”
Fiore shrugs.
Next up, Crayola and Yasmin.
The two look at Chronologica.
“For me…” Floss smiles. “You two really shined tonight.”
“Woo!” Yasmin cheers. “Fantabulous.”
Floss beams. “For me, you were here, you were delivering, you had fun- the two of you, and I was most interested in your festival.”
“Thank you.” Yasmin tears up.
“You have a natural charisma- Yasmin. And this week, you embraced what we needed, Crayola. I’m proud of you both.”
Finally, Omari and Zazu.
Omari stands tall, whilst Zazu smiles.
“I think the reality is you seem… off kilter.” Rachelle says. “And yes, it was a team challenge, but the reality was Omari- you were the weaker link.”
Omari looks frustrated, as the others look at him.
…
Fiore.
Jaslene.
Aguacate.
Granny.
You are… Safe. You may untuck in the platinum lounge.
The four look surprised.
Omari, Zazu, Crayola & Yasmin. Please stand on stage for further critique.
~
Fiore, Jaslene, Granny and Aguacate enter the werkroom.
“Safety!” Aguacate chuckles, grabbing her drink.
Fiore grabs a cocktail. “Yay.”
The four sit down.
“This was interesting.” Granny says.
Aguacate takes a sip of her drink and nods. "Definitely interesting. I didn't expect Omari and Zazu to end up in the bottom. They're usually strong competitors. I mean, Omari is. Zazu is pretty, though." Aguacate giggles.
Fiore rolls her eyes. "Pretty ugly maybe. Well, I'm not surprised. Omari has been struggling lately, and Zazu is just… fat to cut at this point. They deserved to be in the bottom."
“Omari seemed… pissed.” Jaslene adds.
“Oh, he was MAD.” Aguacate giggles.
Fiore takes a sip of her cocktail. "Well, it's about time Omari was challenged. I feel like he’s been coasting, so…”
Jaslene nods, taking out her hand to hold Fiore, who shakes her head. “I’m good.”
Jaslene frowns.
Granny sighs and shakes her head. "I don't like seeing anyone upset, darlings. Drag Race is a tough competition, and emotions can run high. Let's hope they both handle it with grace."
Fiore giggles, before sipping her drink.
Aguacate chuckles. "Fiore, always a tough critic. But hey, it's part of what makes you fierce.”
“Exactly.” Fiore nods. “I'm simply stating the facts. Drag Race is not a place for weak links, and I have no patience for those who can't keep up."
Jaslene Bangus: “Fiore isn’t talking about me, is it? Out of nowhere, she’s suddenly acting… colder.”
"So, what do we think about the upcoming lip sync? Any predictions?" Granny smiles.
Granny raises an eyebrow. "Hmm, it's hard to say. Both Omari and Zazu are fierce performers. I wouldn't be surprised if they bring the house down."
Aguacate smirks. "I have a feeling Omari is going to fight tooth and nail to stay. He's got that fire in him. It'll be an intense lip sync."
Jaslene nods. "Yeah, I can see that. But Zazu is no slouch either. She knows how to captivate an audience. It'll be a battle of fierce personalities."
“I think Omari is going to decimate that girl verbally.” Fiore adds. “I see them fighting.”
“Oh, they’ve already fought before, and..” Granny sighs.
Jaslene shrugs. “I mean, I just hope I’m in the room when it happens.”
Fiore smirks.
“Okay, let’s get drunk!” Aguacate yells, grabbing shot glasses. “TEQUILA!”
~
I want to talk further, and really analyze your performances.
Starting with… Crayola.
Crayola grins.
“I am really happy to have seen you going outside of your shell.” Rachelle nods. “Really commendable.”
“Thank you.” Crayola nods with a grin.
“You played the part of the straight man, and I think that was a fun choice.” Rachelle purses her lips. “But it did mean Yasmin was the more BRIGHT personality.”
Crayola nods.
Zazu.
“Hiya!” Zazu smiles.
I really do like your energy, Zazu. I feel like it’s a real positive and bright energy.
Zazu grins.
But I do want you to keep PUSHING yourself. I need a little more, and I do feel as if yes, you were in many ways brought down by your partner…
Omari looks over.
But, alternatively you struggled and have been struggling. I just… want to see you push it.
Zazu nods.
Yasmin.
Yasmin grins.
“It was a pleasure seeing you this week.” Pyrite says with a grin. “You were charming, you were fun, you were the highlight for me.”
Crayola looks over.
“Wow, I am so ever so pleased.” Yasmin beams.
“It was just- a simply put, masterclass in hosting.” Pyrite nods. “Well done.”
“Thank you.” Yasmin nods.
Omari.
“Baby.” Floss sighs. “This was a disappointing week, for me.”
“Okay.” Omari says. “I can see that.”
“You just- I saw you trying, but it didn’t come across authentic. I was wanting you to loosen up. Did you come up with this concept?” Floss asks.
King Omari Star: “Part of me wants to decimate Zazu on the stage. But…”
“It was a team effort.” Omari responds. “And I want to take accountability for MY performance- because yes, I didn’t meet the mark.”
Floss nods. “I want to see you shine, baby. You’re here to fight. Show it, but let yourself roll with these punches.”
Omari looks down and nods. “Thank you.”
Thanks, racers. Whilst we deliberate, you may untuck backstage in the Crystal Lounge, sponsored by Princess Papaya Tropical Drinks.
~
The four enter the Crystal lounge.
“Where’s my fabulous drink?” Yasmin smiles, grabbing her non-alcoholic drink.
The four sit down.
“So….” Crayola purses her lips. “How do we think we’re placing?”
“Clearly, we’re in the bottom.” Omari looks over at Zazu.
Zazu looks nervously for a second, before nodding.
“How do you feel about that, Omari?” Yasmin asks.
Yasmin Raiz: “He’s… a strong character. And I expect him to probably go at Zazu. I mean, Zazu looks it.”
Zazu looks at Omari.
Omari takes a deep breath and looks directly at Zazu. "I've been doing a lot of thinking lately. These… critiques." Omari begins. "And I realize that instead of being angry and frustrated, I should be using this opportunity to learn and grow. We're both here because we love drag, and we want to show the world what we're capable of. So, instead of dwelling on our flaws, let's embrace them and use them as fuel to give the performance of our lives in the lip sync."
Zazu's eyes widen in surprise, both she nods.
"You're right, Omari. Let's show them the fire that burns within us and give them a lip sync they'll never forget!" Zazu smiles. “I know we didn’t work it out, this week-”
“And I know that is a lot due to myself.” Omari nods. “So I own that.”
“It was me too.” Zazu responds. “But we’re both performers.”
“I live for the stage.” Omari lights up. “And it’s not something I fear, it’s an opportunity.”
“I think the same.” Zazu nods.
"Absolutely! You two have incredible talent, and I have no doubt that you can deliver an unforgettable performance. Just remember, it's not about being perfect; it's about showing your passion and giving it your all." Yasmin responds with a bright grin.
"I've been worried about this challenge, but seeing you two find strength in each other has inspired me. We're all in this together, and we can lift each other up." Crayola adds.
The others walk in, as the four look at each other.
“Oh, not a fight.” Jaslene chuckles.
“Why, were you worried?” Yasmin asks.
“Should we go prepare?” Omari looks at Zazu, who nods.
“I think it’ll be judged individually, and I am so happy to be here, but… I don’t feel like I did as good as you! You just have that… more crowd pleasing personality.” Crayola says with a smile.
Yasmin makes a face, before nodding.
Yasmin Raiz: “Is she shading myself?”
“I mean that with love, my dear.” Crayola adds. “You did fantastic.”
“Thanks.” Yasmin grins.
“Crayola, you really do remind me of what people think of teachers.” Jaslene smiles.
“Thank you.” Crayola grins.
Jaslene smirks.
Zazu turns to Omari with a smile. “Can we hug?”
Omari looks at Zazu. “...Do we have to?”
“We don’t.” Zazu chuckles. “I just want to fight here. Because… I do want this.” Zazu tears up. “My journey here has been challenging, but I love to perform. I love delivering these looks and you know, I see I am doing bad. But my parents- and my drag family, I know they have faith in me.”
“I think you’re a talent.” Omari responds, before exhaling. “I love drag with all my heart, and I want to show the world the passion that drives me. This lip sync is not just about staying in the competition; it's about reclaiming my power and reminding myself why I fell in love with drag in the first place."
“Heck yeah.” Zazu grins.
~
Welcome back, racers. I’ve made my decision.
Crayola Boxx, this week, you worked hard, and brought the spice.
Yasmin, we’re eating YOU UP!
Condragulations, you are BOTH the winner of this week’s challenge.
They smile, with Crayola looking particularly surprised.
Yasmin Raiz: “My WIN!!!” Yasmin cheers.
That means Zazu Nova and King Omari Star, I’m sorry my dears, but you are up for elimination.
The two look at each other.
The time has come… for you to lip sync to your life!
**Livin’ La Vida Loca by Ricky Martin starts to play**
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CN5hQOI\_\_10
Good luck… and don’t fuck it up!
Zazu Nova: “I know this is another week in the bottom. But I love to perform. This is my heart and soul, and I’m going to show it.”
King Omari Star: “It’s time to live La Vida Loca, baby.” Omari smirks.
~
Next Time!
“Racers, it’s time for an IMPROV CHALLENGE!” Rachelle Mirage cheers.
Aguacate gasps.
“I’m stuck in this house…” Granny looks around.
Fiore Stravaganza: “Real talk, it’s time we’re over.”
“A.E Girls?” Jaslene winks.
“Meh.” Fiore responds.
~
Stats
Voting
Spreadsheet
2023.06.04 22:40 Lebo89 Help please!
So I have/had 2, 4 week old outdoor females goin strong. They were about a ft tall each...
About a week ago my true green lawn service people came and NAILED them with the same shit they use to murder dandlions. Now they are curled and twisted up. Where the dandelions are all dead, these are not dead. They are still green.
I have flushed hard everyday since
Can I do anything?? Anyone have similar experiences?
submitted by Lebo89 to trees [link] [comments]
About a week ago my true green lawn service people came and NAILED them with the same shit they use to murder dandlions. Now they are curled and twisted up. Where the dandelions are all dead, these are not dead. They are still green.
I have flushed hard everyday since
Can I do anything?? Anyone have similar experiences?
- they also hit my fig tree cuttings and all my wildflower beds... im heated *
2023.06.04 22:34 Conscious_Fan801 Should I be so sad after 1 date?
Matched with a girl, hit it off instantly, we both liked each other a lot even before our first date. Planned a walk at the local park, we ended up getting dinner and making out. We both had a great time. No joke I was absolutely smitten, not just because she really seemed to like me as much as I liked her.
That was 2 weeks ago. She gradually became more distant with her texts, cancelled our second date, rescheduled and then cancelled it again. I'm feeling pretty bad. I was iffy about the whole thing for the past week but her cancelling again was the final nail in the coffin.
Am I being silly for feeling so sad about what was basically a 1 week relationship? I suppose I've never gone on a date with a girl I knew I actually really liked beforehand. It takes a while for me to open up to people but after only a few days it felt like I had already known her for months. I just feel so disappointed.
submitted by Conscious_Fan801 to dating [link] [comments]
That was 2 weeks ago. She gradually became more distant with her texts, cancelled our second date, rescheduled and then cancelled it again. I'm feeling pretty bad. I was iffy about the whole thing for the past week but her cancelling again was the final nail in the coffin.
Am I being silly for feeling so sad about what was basically a 1 week relationship? I suppose I've never gone on a date with a girl I knew I actually really liked beforehand. It takes a while for me to open up to people but after only a few days it felt like I had already known her for months. I just feel so disappointed.
2023.06.04 22:10 snakestitches i feel like such a loser
The title says it all tbh. In the span of 7 months, I (24F) left my long-term job because it was genuinely killing me, I was so stressed out that I was sick constantly and my white blood cell count was out of whack and just so many other things. The stress of that job messed up my relationship so bad, with someone I thought was my soulmate. Two months after I left he broke up with me, and it turns out the nail in the coffin on our relationship was the fact that he had feelings for someone else and wanted to be with her. Ever since, I have been in a constant slump and can't get out of this depression.
Today I woke up and saw that two bullies I went to school with are being honored on a local site for getting really good degrees. It just broke me. I feel like such a goddamn loser, I feel like I can't do anything and I ruin everything. I've been hopping from job to job because even though I have a Bachelor's degree in criminal justice and experience with computer programs ect. no one except fast food joints will hire me and I'm so sick of it. The job I just started is awful and I'm only doing it out of necessity to pay bills but I can't find a decent enough job to take its place. After my boyfriend left my life really just fell apart. I hated my job but at least there I was important, I was a manager, and I had my boyfriend. Now I feel like this ugly, pitiful loser while everyone around me succeeds and is happy. I don't know how to get out of this slump. I've spent years working on bettering myself and my position in life and it just fell apart on me and now I have no idea what to do. I didn't do internships in college because I had to work full time to support myself and it seems like I earned a degree that's not getting me anywhere. I just feel like such a lost, miserable loser and I had to get it out
submitted by snakestitches to Vent [link] [comments]
Today I woke up and saw that two bullies I went to school with are being honored on a local site for getting really good degrees. It just broke me. I feel like such a goddamn loser, I feel like I can't do anything and I ruin everything. I've been hopping from job to job because even though I have a Bachelor's degree in criminal justice and experience with computer programs ect. no one except fast food joints will hire me and I'm so sick of it. The job I just started is awful and I'm only doing it out of necessity to pay bills but I can't find a decent enough job to take its place. After my boyfriend left my life really just fell apart. I hated my job but at least there I was important, I was a manager, and I had my boyfriend. Now I feel like this ugly, pitiful loser while everyone around me succeeds and is happy. I don't know how to get out of this slump. I've spent years working on bettering myself and my position in life and it just fell apart on me and now I have no idea what to do. I didn't do internships in college because I had to work full time to support myself and it seems like I earned a degree that's not getting me anywhere. I just feel like such a lost, miserable loser and I had to get it out
2023.06.04 21:15 bloodwormgummy Round 9 Winner?
I’m going for Leonidas either winning or a tie and these are my reasons
1) As others have already noticed and posted, Leonidas is carrying on the message or “light” that Tesla left in regards to progression. He isn’t wearing his past military clothes, but modern ones. If he loses that would be weird…
2) Just like the gods “took” humanity’s light, Tesla, the same will happen with their light, Apollo. I’ll get more specific here and say this is the Greek gods light. This is Zeus’ last Greek fighter and not only would he be responsible for another loss for the gods but another fellow Greek dying because of his own arrogance in thinking this was just some game. I’ve seen people say that this is a reason why Apollo has to win, but I see it as a reason he has to lose. It’s the last nail in Zeus’ coffin and the Greek pantheon’s reputation in this tournament. And a step towards Brunhilde’s revenge.
3) This is the first time we have a human killing their own god or a god killing their own human (of the same pantheon) . This is Record of Ragnarok more than any other fight. Leonidas is mankind’s rebel and Apollo is the god’s arrogance. For humanity to lose here sends the message that even humanity’s greatest rebel cannot thwart the gods. But if he wins, it means that the gods are backed more into a corner than ever. It gives more hope to the rebellion if he wins. But this point can go both ways of course so it isn’t that strong.
—————-
So basically I don’t see Leonidas losing but winning or a tie. But why a tie? It’s because of the context for this specific round. We are getting closer to the personal reason (probably Siegfried) as to why Brunhilde hates the gods. She’s actually more in tune with Leonidas than most fighters.
—————
Is it too early to make a judgement? Yeah and honestly how you see certain points is going to be nuanced depending on how you think or want the story to ultimately go.
I’m going to be honest and say I’m bias towards Leonidas. If he loses then I’ll force myself to draw his death scene.
submitted by bloodwormgummy to ShuumatsuNoValkyrie [link] [comments]
1) As others have already noticed and posted, Leonidas is carrying on the message or “light” that Tesla left in regards to progression. He isn’t wearing his past military clothes, but modern ones. If he loses that would be weird…
2) Just like the gods “took” humanity’s light, Tesla, the same will happen with their light, Apollo. I’ll get more specific here and say this is the Greek gods light. This is Zeus’ last Greek fighter and not only would he be responsible for another loss for the gods but another fellow Greek dying because of his own arrogance in thinking this was just some game. I’ve seen people say that this is a reason why Apollo has to win, but I see it as a reason he has to lose. It’s the last nail in Zeus’ coffin and the Greek pantheon’s reputation in this tournament. And a step towards Brunhilde’s revenge.
3) This is the first time we have a human killing their own god or a god killing their own human (of the same pantheon) . This is Record of Ragnarok more than any other fight. Leonidas is mankind’s rebel and Apollo is the god’s arrogance. For humanity to lose here sends the message that even humanity’s greatest rebel cannot thwart the gods. But if he wins, it means that the gods are backed more into a corner than ever. It gives more hope to the rebellion if he wins. But this point can go both ways of course so it isn’t that strong.
—————-
So basically I don’t see Leonidas losing but winning or a tie. But why a tie? It’s because of the context for this specific round. We are getting closer to the personal reason (probably Siegfried) as to why Brunhilde hates the gods. She’s actually more in tune with Leonidas than most fighters.
- Both despise the gods for their arrogance
- Both are going to kill their own gods of their regions (and depending on match ups Brunhilde directly or indirectly)
- Both don’t care if they die as long as they win. This is war.
—————
Is it too early to make a judgement? Yeah and honestly how you see certain points is going to be nuanced depending on how you think or want the story to ultimately go.
I’m going to be honest and say I’m bias towards Leonidas. If he loses then I’ll force myself to draw his death scene.
2023.06.04 20:18 No-Albatross-1861 Hot Take: MGS Delta Doesn't Need Kojima
Allow me to preface this by saying I love the Metal Gear Saga, I love Kojima's ideas, and I'm glad people are excited to see this remake happening and want Kojima involved, but I need to explain to you all in uncensored detail as to why Kojima not being involved truly is the best case scenario for the series going forward.
Metal Gear Solid Δ: Snake Eater is being worked on by two experienced teams who have worked on the series in the past. Not only that, but they are set on making sure the remake is a faithful recreation that only does what is necessary to be enjoyed on modern hardware. There's also new merch, a gorgeously detailed board game, they got Donna Burke coming back for a new recording of snake Eater, and the game isn't being made for a Pachinko machine. It's also being worked on by a Konami that has new management after getting rid of the old management we've come to despise over the years. They haven't shown anything malicious with this or the upcoming Silent Hill 2 remake, so I'm more than willing to give them a second chance, because this is a new Konami. With that out of the way, please read on because the rest of this is important to take note of.
What people fail to understand is that while, yes, it would be amazing to have Kojima working on this, he also did a lot of shady stuff. Due to his Hollywood obsessed ego, people like Norihiko Hibino (who helped with creating the music for Ghost Babel, Sons of Liberty, Twin Snakes, Snake Eater, Portable Ops and Guns of the Patriots) and Tomokazu Fukushima (Kojima's writer for MGS1-3) all basically had their names pushed aside so he could give the main spotlight to more well known Hollywood famous people. Hibino was undermined in MGS2 in favor of Hollywood famous Harry Gregson-Williams and after MGS1-3, Fukushima basically dropped off of the face of the Earth. He's the reason Kojima's games were understandable and more grounded into reality, versus Kojima's writing where MGS4 is all nanomachiens and MGSV is all parasites.
Kojima's also responsible for Twin Snakes being as weird as it ended up being, as the devs originally wanted to make it a 1-1 remake with VR Missions included with new graphics, but Kojima said to make it more like the Matrix which is the complete opposite of how MGS1 was meant to be. Kojima also used the budget that Konami gave him to make MGSV and went behind their back to make a deal with Sony by using said budget to create P.T. as an interview of sorts to secure him a job position at Sony, which is why MGSV went overbudget. In other words, Kojima's the man who sold the world. Let's not forget how Kojima also shafted David Hayter in favor for Kiefer Sutherland when Hayter deserved the role with how passionate he is. Hayter took a massive cut to his paycheck just to make sure they could get most of the original voice cast to return for Twin Snakes, because he knew how much the game meant to people. Kojima would've just told them to find different actors or something along those lines.
Metal Gear Solid 1-3 were all a team effort between Konami and Kojima, not an all Kojima effort, and the fact that so many like to believe it can only be done with Kojima, look at Twin Snakes, Ghost Babel, Ac!d, Ac!d 2 and Portable Ops. Kojima wasn't fully involved, yet they managed to stand on their own, and Twin Snakes would've been better received had Kojima NOT been involved. He's had some really questionable ideas too, like wanting the fight against The End to last three real world weeks, which would've just been annoying to go through and would become rather dull very quickly. Konami ensured that Kojima was kept grounded to reality in terms of gameplay elements and story, while Kojima provided the raw outline of the story and the concept of the characters we love to this day. I hate to be the one to say it, but a Kojima-less remake is the best course of action we could ever hope for. Kojima also undermined Portable Ops because like every other Metal Gear game, it contradicts things, but this time, Kojima didn't direct it, so that justifies it not being canon, apparently. And while, yes, Peace Walker handled the ideas that Portable Ops was trying to convey better in the end and had better gameplay, Portable Ops had more interesting bosses and music.
You guys can look all of these points up as well both through various websites and through YouTube. Kojima's got interesting ideas, but he's a bad writer on his own and a questionable game designer at best in terms of gameplay ideas. Creative minds need to be kept in check from time to time, which is exactly what Kojima needed in MGS4 and MGSV. I says this as somebody who creates stuff himself from time to time. Here's some videos that explain these points further. I love MGS and I respect Kojima's work, but I don't respect having a massive ego, pushing people aside to give others the spotlight, or going behind peoples' backs. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y_1Lt56Pnqg&pp=ygUaa29uYW1pIGRvZXNuJ3QgbmVlZCBrb2ppbWE%3D https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLWFSETZavt35xf9nAJDBsMapZ7inC2UvP
Here's hoping for the best for the series going forward, and I love you all. Have a nice day, and for those of you who read this with an open mind, remember this: You're pretty good.
Edit: I know I'm repeating what Pliskin BOI mentioned, but that's because I really can't describe all of these points any better. He hit the nail right on the coffin.
submitted by No-Albatross-1861 to metalgearsolid [link] [comments]
Metal Gear Solid Δ: Snake Eater is being worked on by two experienced teams who have worked on the series in the past. Not only that, but they are set on making sure the remake is a faithful recreation that only does what is necessary to be enjoyed on modern hardware. There's also new merch, a gorgeously detailed board game, they got Donna Burke coming back for a new recording of snake Eater, and the game isn't being made for a Pachinko machine. It's also being worked on by a Konami that has new management after getting rid of the old management we've come to despise over the years. They haven't shown anything malicious with this or the upcoming Silent Hill 2 remake, so I'm more than willing to give them a second chance, because this is a new Konami. With that out of the way, please read on because the rest of this is important to take note of.
What people fail to understand is that while, yes, it would be amazing to have Kojima working on this, he also did a lot of shady stuff. Due to his Hollywood obsessed ego, people like Norihiko Hibino (who helped with creating the music for Ghost Babel, Sons of Liberty, Twin Snakes, Snake Eater, Portable Ops and Guns of the Patriots) and Tomokazu Fukushima (Kojima's writer for MGS1-3) all basically had their names pushed aside so he could give the main spotlight to more well known Hollywood famous people. Hibino was undermined in MGS2 in favor of Hollywood famous Harry Gregson-Williams and after MGS1-3, Fukushima basically dropped off of the face of the Earth. He's the reason Kojima's games were understandable and more grounded into reality, versus Kojima's writing where MGS4 is all nanomachiens and MGSV is all parasites.
Kojima's also responsible for Twin Snakes being as weird as it ended up being, as the devs originally wanted to make it a 1-1 remake with VR Missions included with new graphics, but Kojima said to make it more like the Matrix which is the complete opposite of how MGS1 was meant to be. Kojima also used the budget that Konami gave him to make MGSV and went behind their back to make a deal with Sony by using said budget to create P.T. as an interview of sorts to secure him a job position at Sony, which is why MGSV went overbudget. In other words, Kojima's the man who sold the world. Let's not forget how Kojima also shafted David Hayter in favor for Kiefer Sutherland when Hayter deserved the role with how passionate he is. Hayter took a massive cut to his paycheck just to make sure they could get most of the original voice cast to return for Twin Snakes, because he knew how much the game meant to people. Kojima would've just told them to find different actors or something along those lines.
Metal Gear Solid 1-3 were all a team effort between Konami and Kojima, not an all Kojima effort, and the fact that so many like to believe it can only be done with Kojima, look at Twin Snakes, Ghost Babel, Ac!d, Ac!d 2 and Portable Ops. Kojima wasn't fully involved, yet they managed to stand on their own, and Twin Snakes would've been better received had Kojima NOT been involved. He's had some really questionable ideas too, like wanting the fight against The End to last three real world weeks, which would've just been annoying to go through and would become rather dull very quickly. Konami ensured that Kojima was kept grounded to reality in terms of gameplay elements and story, while Kojima provided the raw outline of the story and the concept of the characters we love to this day. I hate to be the one to say it, but a Kojima-less remake is the best course of action we could ever hope for. Kojima also undermined Portable Ops because like every other Metal Gear game, it contradicts things, but this time, Kojima didn't direct it, so that justifies it not being canon, apparently. And while, yes, Peace Walker handled the ideas that Portable Ops was trying to convey better in the end and had better gameplay, Portable Ops had more interesting bosses and music.
You guys can look all of these points up as well both through various websites and through YouTube. Kojima's got interesting ideas, but he's a bad writer on his own and a questionable game designer at best in terms of gameplay ideas. Creative minds need to be kept in check from time to time, which is exactly what Kojima needed in MGS4 and MGSV. I says this as somebody who creates stuff himself from time to time. Here's some videos that explain these points further. I love MGS and I respect Kojima's work, but I don't respect having a massive ego, pushing people aside to give others the spotlight, or going behind peoples' backs. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y_1Lt56Pnqg&pp=ygUaa29uYW1pIGRvZXNuJ3QgbmVlZCBrb2ppbWE%3D https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLWFSETZavt35xf9nAJDBsMapZ7inC2UvP
Here's hoping for the best for the series going forward, and I love you all. Have a nice day, and for those of you who read this with an open mind, remember this: You're pretty good.
Edit: I know I'm repeating what Pliskin BOI mentioned, but that's because I really can't describe all of these points any better. He hit the nail right on the coffin.
2023.06.04 19:32 xtremexavier15 TSROTI 4 (pt 2)
The episode resumed with a shot panning down from yet another shot of the moon onto Dave, Scarlett, and DJ walking through the pet cemetery.
"Don't you think Katie should've been back by now?" DJ asked.
"Hey guys," Katie called out, gaining the attention of the three, "I think I found something over there!" The shot cut to a large headstone. "See?" the sweet girl said as the shot came in for a close-up, detailing both a skull mark and a date engraved below it. "June 06, 1806," Katie read. "That's 6, 6, 18, 6, right?"
"Yeah!" DJ said with a smile. "Good eye."
Confessional: DJ
"Katie is pretty resourceful," DJ said to the camera. "Sure she doesn't have her tablet, but at least she's helping the team."
Confessional Ends
"Look," the camera cut back to the headstone's close-up as Dave pointed a finger at the skull mark's oddly-shaped nose hole, "there's a keyhole too."
The shot cut back out to show the whole group as DJ inserted the key, turned it, and was promptly flung backward out of sight by a large, spring-loaded coffin bursting out of a trap door in the ground, much to the Maggots' shock.
"Look at this!" Scarlett called out. "We got flashlights!" The camera cut to the inside of the now-opened coffin, revealing several flashlights standing on a shelf in it.
"Awesome," Dave smiled, as DJ rejoined them. "Let's grab them."
Dave scooped up the flashlights, then ran off with Scarlett.
"You're strong, right?" Katie talked to DJ before running. "Make sure to put that coffin back so the Rats won't know where to look."
DJ lingered long enough to close the coffin and shove it back into its hole, and was about to catch up with his teammates, but was pulled back by the spider's string and eventually got taken away by the spider.
The camera panned in the opposite direction, eventually stopping on a large tree. After a moment, Geoff leaned out from behind it. He decided to make a wolf sound in order to signal his Rat members, who saw what he was doing and were visibly disgusted.
Leshawna smacked the boy. "What are you doing?"
"Using animal calls to signal you?" Geoff answered. "Team Maggot found the souvenirs on the tombstone over there."
"Wow…nice work," Scott said as he slowly reached out to put their key into the keyhole.
"I want to let you know before you open the coffin-" Geoff tried to warn Scott as the latter opened the coffin, but got flung off-screen, making him groan in pain. "-make sure to not get flung."
"That would've been good to hear earlier," Scott looked at his face for injuries angrily, but got his mouth wrapped up by a spider web, before being pulled away by the spider in a flash.
"Scott got taken away!" Leshawna freaked out and held Geoff by his shoulders. "Let's finish the part of the area and get the heck out of here!"
\
The footage flashed to Scarlett and Dave standing before the entrance to a cave, the mouth flanked on either side by flags bearing the team logos.
"Welcome to your final destination!" Chris announced over an unseen loudspeaker, laughing evilly before adding "The clue is just inside the entrance...aaand down the tunnel...into total darkness. Good luck! Yooouuu'll neeeeed iiit!"
Dave gulped and Scarlett snatched a flashlight from him. "Follow my lead," she told him as she turned it on and walked into the cave.
"Wait," Dave said with a hint of anxiousness, "Where's Katie and DJ?"
"They probably fell behind," Scarlett answered back, her words echoing from inside the cave.
Dave lingered for a second. "Go explore the cave. I'll get DJ and Katie."
\
The scene flashed inside and Scarlett peered around with her flashlight. "This location hasn't seen many good days," she said as she noticed what appeared to be the skeleton of an intern suspended in a web, a note taped to its tattered plaid shirt. "And there's the clue," Scarlett remarked, looking closely at the note then reaching out and lightly touching the web. "By hook or by crook, the end is near if you look," she read.
"This writing is simply telling me to locate the finish line by any means necessary-!" She was interrupted by a line of webbing shooting down from the ceiling and wrapping around her body and head, and she struggled to break free before she was pulled up and away.
\
The scene cut to a close-up of Dave's sneakers as he ran through the graveyard. The camera cut outward as he ran up to Katie, who were wandering the area with flashlights in her hand, and said "Hey, Scarlett and I found the cave. Where's DJ?"
"He hasn't arrived," Katie said warily. "The spider likely got him."
"That cave must be where the spider is," Dave theorized. "And if the spider took our teammates, that's where we'll find them."
"Let's go with that then," Katie said, trying to seem determined but coming across as scared.
\
The scene flashed back to the cave entrance. "Scarlett!" Dave called out as the shot cut to him and Katie standing just inside, flashlights already turned on. "Scarlett, where are you?"
"Um, you might want to look over there," Katie said as she pointed out Scarlett's discarded flashlight.
"Well that's not good," Dave said nervously.
Confessional: Dave
"I'm starting to question how we were gonna win this challenge," Dave admitted. "Katie and me aren't exactly capable of fighting off a giant spider."
Confessional Ends
"Look over there!" Katie piped up as the static cut away to the two Maggots walking through the cave. The camera panned ahead along their beams of light to show a creepy skull-like rock with several metal hooks sticking out of it, and the two smiled.
"Those must be the last souvenirs," Dave realized, rushing over to the skull-shaped rock. "We must still be in the lead."
"Look out!" Katie cried out in sudden panic.
"What?" Dave looked back nervously just as a line of web shot down from the ceiling and quickly wrapped him up, encasing just about everything but his head. He moaned before getting hauled up by the spider. It hissed at him menacingly and he screamed in terror, and with a hiss the spider tossed him to the side.
He landed on a larger web suspended in the ceiling, and the shot zoomed out to reveal that the others who'd been captured were within – Scarlett, Scott, DJ, Anne Maria, Sierra, Molly, Trent, and Sammy.
"Who landed in the web now?" Anne Maria asked.
"It's just me," Dave said. "Dave."
"At this rate, it's up to the ones who didn't get captured to figure something out," DJ pointed out.
Confessional: Dave
"The plus side to not being a cartoon character? I don't have to worry about getting spider-like powers," Dave confessed.
Confessional Ends
The shot cut back down to the cave floor, Katie still looking up nervously just as Geoff and Leshawna finally arrived on the scene.
"There's the next souvenir! And our teammates! And a gigantic spider!" Geoff pointed out his surroundings to his teammate.
"Well, I guess we found the right place," Leshawna commented as she went ahead.
"So what should our plan be?" Geoff sprinted towards Leshawna, but tripped and collided into Leshawna, sending both flat on the ground.
They instantly got wrapped together by the spider's stringed web. "I'm starting to think that we're a bad duo," Leshawna frowned dryly.
Confessional: Leshawna
"Geoff's sweeter than honey, but he needs to think more before he acts," Leshawna stated. "I'll cut him some slack since we didn't land in the web."
Confessional Ends
"Katie! Go grab the hook and we'll win!" Molly ordered.
"Okay. I'm on it," Katie went to take off a hook.
"But we're still trapped in this web with no way to get out," DJ tried to protest.
"Uh, DJ," Dave realized something that caught his eye.
"Huh?" DJ replied back.
"The spider is coming towards us!" Dave shouted, causing everyone to freak out in a panic as the giant mutant arachnid crawled towards them, its fangs dripping green venom.
"Someone get us outta here!" Anne Maria shouted, causing Katie to stop in her tracks.
"Everyone is in danger," Katie gasped. "I'm coming to help."
"You should get the hook first!" Scarlett tried to advise her teammate.
The spider was hissing right at the people in front of the web. "Somebody do something!" Trent yelled out as the camera panned over to Dave's scared face.
And then, with a burst of adrenaline, Dave burst free of his silken cocoon and tackled the giant spider clear off the web. They swung away on a line of silk attaching the spider to the ceiling, and the normal guy began to pound furiously on the back of the mutant's abdomen.
Confessional: Dave
"Adrenaline can really get your blood pumping," Dave explained in an impressed tone of voice.
Confessional Ends
Meanwhile, Katie was shown climbing the tree that had the spider webs attached, but fell back down. "I can't reach the top!"
"Really?" Molly questioned her.
"Sorry, Maggots," Katie apologized. "I don't have enough muscle power to reach you."
"If that's the case, then go and get the hook," Scarlett demanded.
"But I don't want to leave you behind!" Katie stood firm.
"You need to win! You're the only member of the team who isn't trapped in a giant web!" DJ said supportively.
"I'll do it, but I'll come back to help you. I promise that," Katie declared bravely before grabbing her hook and ran to the zipline.
Leshawna was struggling to get to the hook due to her situation of being stuck with Geoff.
"Wow! I'm surprised you can hold us up together, even if we're trapped," Geoff marveled at her strength.
"I came to win, not to quit!" Leshawna said determinedly before tugging a hook off the skull rock.
The shot quickly cut to Dave and the spider, the boy now jumping up and down on the mutant's back.
"You spiders have been a big pain in the neck ever since I was young!" Dave confronted the mutant spider while the shot cut to the stalactite the spider's line was attached to, the rock beginning to crack.
Katie attached her hook to the zipline. "I'm ready." She took off screaming afterwards.
"I won't let you bother me anymore!" Dave continued his attack on the spider.
With one final jump the silk line snapped, sending him and the spider to the floor and causing rocks to fall from the ceiling. Those stuck in the web screamed as dust filled the air.
"Go go go!" Geoff hastily commanded Leshawna as he saw the place crumbling. Leshawna quickly hooked them to the zipline and they took off.
There was an ominous snap followed by thuds and grunts. The dust dissipated to reveal that all the captives – as well as the web itself – had fallen to the cave floor.
Several groans filled the air as everyone tried to recover, the silken prisons beginning to unravel.
\
The scene cut to near-complete darkness, lit only by the eyes of some unknown creatures – and three known ones, based on their screams. Katie zipped through the darkness screaming, with Leshawna and Geoff zipping past a few seconds later screaming as well, and soon enough made it to the other side – a smaller tunnel in the side of a cliff face, with the zip line tied to the end of a small stalactite on an overhang just outside. Katie arrived first and dropped when her hook slammed into the end of the line; Geoff and Leshawna arrived moments later, and landed on top of the Maggot girl when their hook slammed to a stop as well.
The shot panned down to them as they all groaned in pain.
"Looks like both teams made it out," Chris chimed in, walking up from the left and looking the three over. "That's something I did not expect at all."
"So who won the challenge?" Katie asked after standing up. "I did arrive before the Rats did."
"Today's winning team iiiiss," Chris announced, pausing for effect, "the Rats!"
"What?" Katie asked. "But I arrived here first!"
"Remember when I said stick together, 'cause there'd be a penalty for each team member you lost?" Chris placed a hand on Katie's shoulder. "Yeah, you lost your whole team. The same would go for Leshawna, but at least she brought someone with her. So, the Rats totally win!"
"I was wrong, Geoff," Leshawna cheered for her team. "We do make a good team."
Katie was distraught to lose. "I knew I should've stayed back and gotten my teammates down!"
"So true," Chris replied without a care.
\
The scene cut back to the cave as Dave approached the camera coughing. He looked down and gasped. The perspective inverted and the camera panned across what looked like a canister of artificial webbing, nuts and bolts and the tattered remains of a spider costume, and the all-too-familiar legs and torso and arms and groaning head of Izzy.
The psycho hose beast groaned before shouting "Boo!" and laughed silly.
Confessional: Dave
"Turns out it was just one of the old cast members in a spider costume," Dave explained in the confessional. "Though it makes sense in context. Izzy and Spider-Man are both annoying, but at least they can be funny sometimes." he quipped. "I'm still not a huge fan of spiders, but I can at least tolerate them now."
Confessional Ends
The scene cut to a shot of the island at night, the camera zooming in then cutting to the six Mutant Maggots at the campfire pit – Dave and Katie together on the left side of the back row; Anne Maria and Scarlett on the front left; Molly on the back right; and DJ on the front right.
"Team Maggot, welcome to your second elimination ceremony," Chris began. "I would comment on your collective failures and mistakes throughout the challenge, but it speaks for itself." The shot shows some of the Maggots either disappointed or shooting daggers at Chris.
"Just pass out the marshmallows already," Dave grumbled.
"Someone's eager," Chris smiled in satisfaction before seeing that Chef wasn't present. "Where's Chef with the Marshmallow of Loserdom?"
\
Elsewhere, Chef was tied to a post in frustration as a number of plungers were stuck to his face. The camera panned out to show that Izzy, currently holding a bow while wearing a tribal headband, was the one responsible for his fate. She laughed after hitting Chef one too many times with the plungers, much to Chef's annoyance.
\
"If Chef isn't here, does that mean the elimination ceremony is canceled?" Anne Maria raised her hand.
"Heck no. I'm still gonna send one of your butts home," Chris announced. "And the person who's leaving is...," he said with an impish smile, pausing for effect.
"Nobody! Psyche!"
"Wait, what?" Katie said in confusion.
"I was kidding all along!" Chris laughed. "The elimination ceremony is canceled. Not because of Chef not being here. But because this is a non-elimination episode."
"So if none of us would be taking the Hurl of Shame, then what was the point of even having us here?" Scarlett asked.
"I just love tension," Chris answered with a smug grin.
"Awesome!" Katie squealed cutely. "I was afraid I would be eliminated!"
"Whatever," Chris said, rolling his eyes. "Kinda disappointing no one's going for a catapult ride, though." He looked over to the right, and an idea dawned upon him. "I think I know who would be willing to."
\
The scene flashed to the Dock of Shame, Izzy in the catapult's bucket with Chris standing nearby.
"This catapult is amazing, but why am I here?" Izzy asked the host.
"Because somebody needs to get hurled tonight," Chris explained as he walked over to the catapult's lever. "Plus, you seem like the type to enjoy this kind of stuff."
"You know me so well. Now press that lever," Izzy grinned before Chris pulled the lever and launched her cheering loudly into the night sky.
"Wanna know who I'm gonna catapult off the island next?" he turned and asked the camera as the capstone theme began to play. "You'll have to come back and find out, right here on Total! Drama! Revenge, of the Island!"
(Roll the Credits)
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"Don't you think Katie should've been back by now?" DJ asked.
"Hey guys," Katie called out, gaining the attention of the three, "I think I found something over there!" The shot cut to a large headstone. "See?" the sweet girl said as the shot came in for a close-up, detailing both a skull mark and a date engraved below it. "June 06, 1806," Katie read. "That's 6, 6, 18, 6, right?"
"Yeah!" DJ said with a smile. "Good eye."
Confessional: DJ
"Katie is pretty resourceful," DJ said to the camera. "Sure she doesn't have her tablet, but at least she's helping the team."
Confessional Ends
"Look," the camera cut back to the headstone's close-up as Dave pointed a finger at the skull mark's oddly-shaped nose hole, "there's a keyhole too."
The shot cut back out to show the whole group as DJ inserted the key, turned it, and was promptly flung backward out of sight by a large, spring-loaded coffin bursting out of a trap door in the ground, much to the Maggots' shock.
"Look at this!" Scarlett called out. "We got flashlights!" The camera cut to the inside of the now-opened coffin, revealing several flashlights standing on a shelf in it.
"Awesome," Dave smiled, as DJ rejoined them. "Let's grab them."
Dave scooped up the flashlights, then ran off with Scarlett.
"You're strong, right?" Katie talked to DJ before running. "Make sure to put that coffin back so the Rats won't know where to look."
DJ lingered long enough to close the coffin and shove it back into its hole, and was about to catch up with his teammates, but was pulled back by the spider's string and eventually got taken away by the spider.
The camera panned in the opposite direction, eventually stopping on a large tree. After a moment, Geoff leaned out from behind it. He decided to make a wolf sound in order to signal his Rat members, who saw what he was doing and were visibly disgusted.
Leshawna smacked the boy. "What are you doing?"
"Using animal calls to signal you?" Geoff answered. "Team Maggot found the souvenirs on the tombstone over there."
"Wow…nice work," Scott said as he slowly reached out to put their key into the keyhole.
"I want to let you know before you open the coffin-" Geoff tried to warn Scott as the latter opened the coffin, but got flung off-screen, making him groan in pain. "-make sure to not get flung."
"That would've been good to hear earlier," Scott looked at his face for injuries angrily, but got his mouth wrapped up by a spider web, before being pulled away by the spider in a flash.
"Scott got taken away!" Leshawna freaked out and held Geoff by his shoulders. "Let's finish the part of the area and get the heck out of here!"
\
The footage flashed to Scarlett and Dave standing before the entrance to a cave, the mouth flanked on either side by flags bearing the team logos.
"Welcome to your final destination!" Chris announced over an unseen loudspeaker, laughing evilly before adding "The clue is just inside the entrance...aaand down the tunnel...into total darkness. Good luck! Yooouuu'll neeeeed iiit!"
Dave gulped and Scarlett snatched a flashlight from him. "Follow my lead," she told him as she turned it on and walked into the cave.
"Wait," Dave said with a hint of anxiousness, "Where's Katie and DJ?"
"They probably fell behind," Scarlett answered back, her words echoing from inside the cave.
Dave lingered for a second. "Go explore the cave. I'll get DJ and Katie."
\
The scene flashed inside and Scarlett peered around with her flashlight. "This location hasn't seen many good days," she said as she noticed what appeared to be the skeleton of an intern suspended in a web, a note taped to its tattered plaid shirt. "And there's the clue," Scarlett remarked, looking closely at the note then reaching out and lightly touching the web. "By hook or by crook, the end is near if you look," she read.
"This writing is simply telling me to locate the finish line by any means necessary-!" She was interrupted by a line of webbing shooting down from the ceiling and wrapping around her body and head, and she struggled to break free before she was pulled up and away.
\
The scene cut to a close-up of Dave's sneakers as he ran through the graveyard. The camera cut outward as he ran up to Katie, who were wandering the area with flashlights in her hand, and said "Hey, Scarlett and I found the cave. Where's DJ?"
"He hasn't arrived," Katie said warily. "The spider likely got him."
"That cave must be where the spider is," Dave theorized. "And if the spider took our teammates, that's where we'll find them."
"Let's go with that then," Katie said, trying to seem determined but coming across as scared.
\
The scene flashed back to the cave entrance. "Scarlett!" Dave called out as the shot cut to him and Katie standing just inside, flashlights already turned on. "Scarlett, where are you?"
"Um, you might want to look over there," Katie said as she pointed out Scarlett's discarded flashlight.
"Well that's not good," Dave said nervously.
Confessional: Dave
"I'm starting to question how we were gonna win this challenge," Dave admitted. "Katie and me aren't exactly capable of fighting off a giant spider."
Confessional Ends
"Look over there!" Katie piped up as the static cut away to the two Maggots walking through the cave. The camera panned ahead along their beams of light to show a creepy skull-like rock with several metal hooks sticking out of it, and the two smiled.
"Those must be the last souvenirs," Dave realized, rushing over to the skull-shaped rock. "We must still be in the lead."
"Look out!" Katie cried out in sudden panic.
"What?" Dave looked back nervously just as a line of web shot down from the ceiling and quickly wrapped him up, encasing just about everything but his head. He moaned before getting hauled up by the spider. It hissed at him menacingly and he screamed in terror, and with a hiss the spider tossed him to the side.
He landed on a larger web suspended in the ceiling, and the shot zoomed out to reveal that the others who'd been captured were within – Scarlett, Scott, DJ, Anne Maria, Sierra, Molly, Trent, and Sammy.
"Who landed in the web now?" Anne Maria asked.
"It's just me," Dave said. "Dave."
"At this rate, it's up to the ones who didn't get captured to figure something out," DJ pointed out.
Confessional: Dave
"The plus side to not being a cartoon character? I don't have to worry about getting spider-like powers," Dave confessed.
Confessional Ends
The shot cut back down to the cave floor, Katie still looking up nervously just as Geoff and Leshawna finally arrived on the scene.
"There's the next souvenir! And our teammates! And a gigantic spider!" Geoff pointed out his surroundings to his teammate.
"Well, I guess we found the right place," Leshawna commented as she went ahead.
"So what should our plan be?" Geoff sprinted towards Leshawna, but tripped and collided into Leshawna, sending both flat on the ground.
They instantly got wrapped together by the spider's stringed web. "I'm starting to think that we're a bad duo," Leshawna frowned dryly.
Confessional: Leshawna
"Geoff's sweeter than honey, but he needs to think more before he acts," Leshawna stated. "I'll cut him some slack since we didn't land in the web."
Confessional Ends
"Katie! Go grab the hook and we'll win!" Molly ordered.
"Okay. I'm on it," Katie went to take off a hook.
"But we're still trapped in this web with no way to get out," DJ tried to protest.
"Uh, DJ," Dave realized something that caught his eye.
"Huh?" DJ replied back.
"The spider is coming towards us!" Dave shouted, causing everyone to freak out in a panic as the giant mutant arachnid crawled towards them, its fangs dripping green venom.
"Someone get us outta here!" Anne Maria shouted, causing Katie to stop in her tracks.
"Everyone is in danger," Katie gasped. "I'm coming to help."
"You should get the hook first!" Scarlett tried to advise her teammate.
The spider was hissing right at the people in front of the web. "Somebody do something!" Trent yelled out as the camera panned over to Dave's scared face.
And then, with a burst of adrenaline, Dave burst free of his silken cocoon and tackled the giant spider clear off the web. They swung away on a line of silk attaching the spider to the ceiling, and the normal guy began to pound furiously on the back of the mutant's abdomen.
Confessional: Dave
"Adrenaline can really get your blood pumping," Dave explained in an impressed tone of voice.
Confessional Ends
Meanwhile, Katie was shown climbing the tree that had the spider webs attached, but fell back down. "I can't reach the top!"
"Really?" Molly questioned her.
"Sorry, Maggots," Katie apologized. "I don't have enough muscle power to reach you."
"If that's the case, then go and get the hook," Scarlett demanded.
"But I don't want to leave you behind!" Katie stood firm.
"You need to win! You're the only member of the team who isn't trapped in a giant web!" DJ said supportively.
"I'll do it, but I'll come back to help you. I promise that," Katie declared bravely before grabbing her hook and ran to the zipline.
Leshawna was struggling to get to the hook due to her situation of being stuck with Geoff.
"Wow! I'm surprised you can hold us up together, even if we're trapped," Geoff marveled at her strength.
"I came to win, not to quit!" Leshawna said determinedly before tugging a hook off the skull rock.
The shot quickly cut to Dave and the spider, the boy now jumping up and down on the mutant's back.
"You spiders have been a big pain in the neck ever since I was young!" Dave confronted the mutant spider while the shot cut to the stalactite the spider's line was attached to, the rock beginning to crack.
Katie attached her hook to the zipline. "I'm ready." She took off screaming afterwards.
"I won't let you bother me anymore!" Dave continued his attack on the spider.
With one final jump the silk line snapped, sending him and the spider to the floor and causing rocks to fall from the ceiling. Those stuck in the web screamed as dust filled the air.
"Go go go!" Geoff hastily commanded Leshawna as he saw the place crumbling. Leshawna quickly hooked them to the zipline and they took off.
There was an ominous snap followed by thuds and grunts. The dust dissipated to reveal that all the captives – as well as the web itself – had fallen to the cave floor.
Several groans filled the air as everyone tried to recover, the silken prisons beginning to unravel.
\
The scene cut to near-complete darkness, lit only by the eyes of some unknown creatures – and three known ones, based on their screams. Katie zipped through the darkness screaming, with Leshawna and Geoff zipping past a few seconds later screaming as well, and soon enough made it to the other side – a smaller tunnel in the side of a cliff face, with the zip line tied to the end of a small stalactite on an overhang just outside. Katie arrived first and dropped when her hook slammed into the end of the line; Geoff and Leshawna arrived moments later, and landed on top of the Maggot girl when their hook slammed to a stop as well.
The shot panned down to them as they all groaned in pain.
"Looks like both teams made it out," Chris chimed in, walking up from the left and looking the three over. "That's something I did not expect at all."
"So who won the challenge?" Katie asked after standing up. "I did arrive before the Rats did."
"Today's winning team iiiiss," Chris announced, pausing for effect, "the Rats!"
"What?" Katie asked. "But I arrived here first!"
"Remember when I said stick together, 'cause there'd be a penalty for each team member you lost?" Chris placed a hand on Katie's shoulder. "Yeah, you lost your whole team. The same would go for Leshawna, but at least she brought someone with her. So, the Rats totally win!"
"I was wrong, Geoff," Leshawna cheered for her team. "We do make a good team."
Katie was distraught to lose. "I knew I should've stayed back and gotten my teammates down!"
"So true," Chris replied without a care.
\
The scene cut back to the cave as Dave approached the camera coughing. He looked down and gasped. The perspective inverted and the camera panned across what looked like a canister of artificial webbing, nuts and bolts and the tattered remains of a spider costume, and the all-too-familiar legs and torso and arms and groaning head of Izzy.
The psycho hose beast groaned before shouting "Boo!" and laughed silly.
Confessional: Dave
"Turns out it was just one of the old cast members in a spider costume," Dave explained in the confessional. "Though it makes sense in context. Izzy and Spider-Man are both annoying, but at least they can be funny sometimes." he quipped. "I'm still not a huge fan of spiders, but I can at least tolerate them now."
Confessional Ends
The scene cut to a shot of the island at night, the camera zooming in then cutting to the six Mutant Maggots at the campfire pit – Dave and Katie together on the left side of the back row; Anne Maria and Scarlett on the front left; Molly on the back right; and DJ on the front right.
"Team Maggot, welcome to your second elimination ceremony," Chris began. "I would comment on your collective failures and mistakes throughout the challenge, but it speaks for itself." The shot shows some of the Maggots either disappointed or shooting daggers at Chris.
"Just pass out the marshmallows already," Dave grumbled.
"Someone's eager," Chris smiled in satisfaction before seeing that Chef wasn't present. "Where's Chef with the Marshmallow of Loserdom?"
\
Elsewhere, Chef was tied to a post in frustration as a number of plungers were stuck to his face. The camera panned out to show that Izzy, currently holding a bow while wearing a tribal headband, was the one responsible for his fate. She laughed after hitting Chef one too many times with the plungers, much to Chef's annoyance.
\
"If Chef isn't here, does that mean the elimination ceremony is canceled?" Anne Maria raised her hand.
"Heck no. I'm still gonna send one of your butts home," Chris announced. "And the person who's leaving is...," he said with an impish smile, pausing for effect.
"Nobody! Psyche!"
"Wait, what?" Katie said in confusion.
"I was kidding all along!" Chris laughed. "The elimination ceremony is canceled. Not because of Chef not being here. But because this is a non-elimination episode."
"So if none of us would be taking the Hurl of Shame, then what was the point of even having us here?" Scarlett asked.
"I just love tension," Chris answered with a smug grin.
"Awesome!" Katie squealed cutely. "I was afraid I would be eliminated!"
"Whatever," Chris said, rolling his eyes. "Kinda disappointing no one's going for a catapult ride, though." He looked over to the right, and an idea dawned upon him. "I think I know who would be willing to."
\
The scene flashed to the Dock of Shame, Izzy in the catapult's bucket with Chris standing nearby.
"This catapult is amazing, but why am I here?" Izzy asked the host.
"Because somebody needs to get hurled tonight," Chris explained as he walked over to the catapult's lever. "Plus, you seem like the type to enjoy this kind of stuff."
"You know me so well. Now press that lever," Izzy grinned before Chris pulled the lever and launched her cheering loudly into the night sky.
"Wanna know who I'm gonna catapult off the island next?" he turned and asked the camera as the capstone theme began to play. "You'll have to come back and find out, right here on Total! Drama! Revenge, of the Island!"
(Roll the Credits)
2023.06.04 19:31 xtremexavier15 TSROTI 4 (pt 1)
Toxic Rats: Geoff, Scott, Leshawna, Sammy, Trent
Mutant Maggots: Anne Maria, Katie, Molly, Scarlett, Dave, DJ
Episode 04: Finders Creepers
"Last time, on Total Drama Revenge of the Island!" Chris opened over a stock shot of the camp, the recap montage starting off with a clip of the contestants racing off towards the side of Mt. Looming Tragedy. "Twelve bumbling buffoons battled it out in a brutal buffet of bombastica," Chef was shown gleefully dropping ice blocks on the climbing campers, catching Geoff and Scott but narrowly missing Molly and almost catching Anne Maria.
"Why all the 'B' words?" B was shown demonstrating his couch invention created from junk, "Because, B proved he was a brave and brilliant improviser who scored big time for his team!" B used an ice pick to poke holes onto a shard of ice and placed it on top of the castle, directing the sun beam towards the Maggots' base and melting it effectively. "Until his bitter teammate Scott allowed brainy Molly to botch it on purpose and B got the boot," Molly threw a snowball onto the shard, melting the castle and B was shown being flung into the night.
"And now," Chris said, popping up in front of a shot of the full moon in a cloudy sky with a lit candle in his hand, marking the end of the recap montage, "tonight's challenge is about fear." He made a devilish look. "And everyone knows fear is a dish best served, in the dark!" he said in an exaggeratedly spooky manner, an eerie sound playing as he laughed evilly. "Huh?" he stopped suddenly, the camera pulling back to reveal Chef standing next to him...dressed like a showgirl with lots of peacock feathers. "Chef!" the host said in annoyance.
"Wardrobe was all out of vampire costumes," Chef explained as the series's capstone then began to play.
"It's all scary!" Chris said, walking off to the left. "Other than that," he scowled and gestured back toward his off-screen assistant. "Right here! Right now!" he resumed his usual demeanor. "On Total! Drama! Revenge, of the Island!" He adopted his spooky tone as he finished the title, and ended with another evil laugh.
XXXXX
Frogs and crickets chirped and croaked, joined by an owl's hoots as the episode opened on a shot of the full moon. The camera panned down to the cabins as the sound of snoring was added to the nighttime mix, and the scene cut inside to the girls' side of the Maggots' cabin where Anne Maria and Katie were sleeping peacefully in the bunk they shared. Dave and DJ were also shown sound asleep on the boys' side, and the scene cut to the Rat boys to show Geoff also sound asleep.
The camera cut next to show Sammy waking up with a yawn. She stretched her arms out for a few good seconds and fell right back to sleep...until the sudden shrill wail of a blow horn pierced the air.
"RUN! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!" Chris hollered from off-screen as the scene cut back outside, the blowhorn continuing even over the panicked shouts of the campers.
The camera briefly cut to a close-up of the blowhorn still blowing, then over to the Maggots' cabin as they ran outside fully dressed – first Katie screaming "What's happening?!"; then DJ just screaming; then Scarlett yelling out "This is unethical!"; then Anne Maria just hollering; and then finally Dave coming out, calling out "I'm wide awake!"
The Rats were shown next, Scott grunting "Me first!" as he shoved Geoff down the stairs and slid down the railing; Leshawna quickly running after him; Sammy screaming at the top of her lungs; and Trent coming out last at around the same time while screaming.
They assembled nervously in the common area between cabins, where Chris – wearing a pair of heavy earmuffs – finally eased up on the blowhorn. "Glad you all could make it," he grinned as he took off his headgear.
Molly soon arrived later. "Is there an attack or what?" she asked her teammates.
Katie shot her a quick glare. "Of course not, but why would you care about anything but yourself?"
Confessional: Molly
"Olay, yes," Molly moaned. "I left my teammates behind, but that was because I wanted to win the challenge first. I was always taught to focus on one thing before moving on to the next, and that's what I did." She grew concerned. "I don't see any problems with that."
Confessional Ends
"I hope you're all ready," Chris continued, "'cause it's challenge time!" He stepped to the side as Chef rolled up a large widescreen television on a wheeled cart. It was currently displaying an aerial map of the island with several additional colored icons – six bright green skulls scattered around the island; three yellowish envelopes over the campfire pit, the western edge of the campgrounds, and deeper into the forest; and a large purple spider in the middle of it all.
"We're gonna do a challenge?" Anne Maria wondered. "In the middle of the woods? At night?"
Confessional: Anne Maria
"Doesn't Chris know that we need our hours of sleep?" Anne Maria criticized. "I haven't even done my hair."
Confessional Ends
"Your challenge," Chris continued as though there'd been no interruption, "a scavenger hunt for three creepy souvenirs. Your locations? A haunted forest," he walked across to the other side of the television, "a scaaary pet cemetery, and an extra spooktastic cave. First team to each location gets a special clue," he said, the camera zooming in as he pointed towards the westernmost letter icon on the screen. "But watch out for booby traps," he added jovially as he moved his finger to one of the skulls, "I really went to town with them, heheh." The campers were shown watching warily.
"So move fast," the host added, "and stick together. You'll be penalized for each player you lose!"
"Umm, what's with the giant spider?" Sammy asked.
"Oh yeah," Chris answered as the shot zoomed in on the icon in question, "there's some kinda gigantic mutated spider sorta running around loose on the island."
The cast immediately started to voice their fears and protests.
"A huge, humongous spider is on the loose?!" DJ hugged Katie out of fear.
"I guess so," Katie said frightfully, but was secretly enjoying DJ hugging her.
The shot zoomed in on Dave in particular as he looked around, moaning "Oh no..." in annoyance.
Confessional: Dave
"Ever since I was a kid, I've never been a huge fan of spiders," Dave admitted. "They leave messy webs everywhere they go, and it takes me a long time to clean them up in places like my uncle's attic or my aunt's basement." A spider soon crawled down on a string. "This is gonna be unpopular, but I'm not a huge fan of Spider-Man because of my dislike of spiders." The spider hissed after hearing the criticism, making Dave flinch.
Confessional: Leshawna
"I may seem fearless on the outside, but spiders are one of the few things I'm terrified of," Leshawna said nervously. "Anything with eight legs is frightening enough."
Confessional Ends
"And since I want to keep things fair for both teams," Chris continued, "I decided to bring back an eliminated contestant for the Rats."
"It's so good to be back here!" the familiar voice of Sierra was heard, becoming more recognizable when she ran next to Chris.
"Sierra! I haven't introduced you yet!" Chris snapped at her.
"If I waited any longer, the episode would've been past the usual 22-minute runtime," Sierra explained. "I'll just go join the Toxic Rats and save you the trouble of doing so since I've rejoined."
Chris watched the fangirl run up to the contestants in annoyance. "Long story short, Sierra is the returnee." Chris regained his smile, and the dramatic and almost heroic tune started playing again. "There's nothing to fear but mortal terror itself! Talk soon," he added impishly, sounding his blowhorn once again.
The twelve campers ran off towards the woods.
\
The footage flashed ahead to another shot of the full moon over the forested hills of Wawanakwa, an owl hooting as the scene cut down to ground level. The logo of the Toxic Rats appeared in the corner of the screen just before the team itself did, running up and stopping in front of a tree with a loudspeaker set up in its branches.
"We're in first place! Sweet!" Geoff cheered just before the loudspeaker whined into activity.
"Welcome to the Haunted Forest!" Chris announced over it, the shot panning downward to show the six Rats gathering around a small crack in the ground. "Your clue can be found at the base of this tree!" Sierra reached into the hole...and screamed in pain as something metallic snapped inside the hole.
"Inside a bear trap," Chris finished his announcement with a laugh.
Sierra withdrew her hand from the hole, the trap clamped down firmly on her arm – though she was at least clutching a note in her hand. "Here! Read the clue," she said, passing it to a mildly shocked Sammy. Just as she was about to read it, the sound of approaching footsteps distracted her and her teammates.
"Bad news guys," Anne Maria commented from the six Maggots. "They have the clue."
"Even with a team advantage they still managed to beat us," Katie reminded them.
"We can let the opposing team have their clue," Scarlett said, looking back towards her teammates. "I have another plan," she said, running ahead with her teammates in tow.
\
The shot cut to the Maggots as they stopped at a clearing further along the trail. "So what's the plan?" Katie asked the girl in front.
"Find a place to hide so we can follow the Rats and their clue to our first souvenir," Scarlett answered. "Into that bush!"
The Maggots dived and painfully tried to hide in a thorn bush.
"Be quiet," Dave hissed, "They're coming."
"Inside a knot is a nest," Sammy read as the scene cut to the Rats. "Your souvenir lives with a pest. Find Polaris to travel northwest? Polaris is the North Star."
"The North Star is right there, so this way's northwest! There's a path!" Trent declared. He ran off, the rest of his teammates following suit.
"Now we follow!" Scarlett declared as the rest of her teammates came out of the bush.
\
The Rats' logo reappeared as the footage skipped ahead again to them running along through the woods.
"Inside a knot is a nest," Geoff muttered to himself as the shot zoomed in on him. "Hey Sammy, what was the rest of that poem again?" he called back without taking his eyes off the path ahead.
When he didn't get an answer he immediately skidded to a stop. "Sammy?!" he yelled in rising panic, and looked back to see nobody behind him.
The shot cut back to show that the rest of the Rats had stopped in their tracks. "What? Did we lose the mouse?" Scott asked.
Geoff gulped. "We get a penalty for each player we lose, right?" he asked nervously.
"And there's a spider crawling around, right?!" Leshawna said in panic. The shot cut outward as he did so, showing a large purple spider crawling down through the shadows of the forest trees.
"We're looking for a knot with a nest, right?" Scott looked off to the right; the camera quick-panned over to a large tree with a noticeable hollow knot in the trunk with the hints of a nest inside; a few green and red marks had been spray-painted on the bark under it.
"There it is!" Leshawna said, immediately rushing towards it.
"But what about Sammy?" Trent asked his team.
"We'll look for her after we get the souvenir," Sierra assured him.
Leshawna started climbing up the trunk as the rest of her team ran up to join her, and soon began to root through the tree hollow with one arm.
Suddenly, a large eye opened up inside the hollow and stared directly at Leshawna. She screamed, and several squid-like tentacles reached out of the tree's other hollows. One quickly grabbed her around the neck and held her up, while another gave her a few wet slaps then poked her in the eye.
"My eye!" Leshawna yelped in pain and terror. In response the tentacle tightened its grip, and Leshawna began to choke.
"What do we do!?" Sierra yelled in panic.
Geoff looked around, then bent down and picked up a handful of small rocks. "We can throw these stones at the octo guy!"
"Good idea!" Scott said as he and his team picked up rocks of their own and began throwing them at the creature, but they seemed to be hitting Leshawna more than the mutant squid-tree monster. Eventually, the thing just raised its captive up even higher, then slammed her down onto the ground and hissed at the others.
"RUN!" Geoff shouted, turning to flee as a tentacle shot towards them, forcing them to scatter.
Unfortunately, Trent was unable to get away in time and was lifted up by the leg. Trent cried in pain as the mutant began to punch him in the stomach with a curled-up tentacle.
The sounds of pain and wet punches caused Leshawna to get frustrated. "No way am I gonna get pushed around or let a squid attack my teammates!" she declared, getting back on her feet and climbing up the tree-squid's trunk while it was distracted. "Quit buggin' us!" she cried as she punched the mutant in the eye.
The beast bellowed in pain, dropping Trent and retracting into its tree. As soon as he got back up, a strand of spider's webbing shot down from above, sticking on to his head and pulling him away from the floor.
Leshawna reached into the knot once again, quickly and triumphantly pulling out a brass key. "And that's how I roll!" she called down to her teammates.
She dropped down to the forest floor, and landed in front of Geoff, who grinned when he saw it. "We got the key, Trent." Geoff received no response as Scott rejoined.
"Trent?!" Leshawna yelled out in concern. "Where are you?!"
As she panicked, the shot changed to a perspective further away, and the footage switched to an infrared shot of the four Rats.
"Guess he's gone," Sierra sighed sadly. "On the plus side, we found the key."
"We lost two players!" Leshawna said. "Shouldn't we go and look for them?"
"Knowing Chris, he probably has them trapped someplace else, so I'm not too worried right now," Scott brushed it off.
"You've got a point there," Geoff agreed.
Just then, the six Maggots arrived on the scene.
Scott was the first to notice them. "No luck here," he quickly said with faux disappointment, "Do you want to see if Sammy and Trent saw anything better over there?" he looked back and asked Sierra, Leshawna, and Geoff.
"Absolutely. It's not just the three of us," Sierra caught on before they turned and ran off.
"I see something!" Katie pointed off to the camera's right – the direction of the squid-tree. "Team colors!" The camera briefly cut over to the knot in question, with a focus on the marks below it in the two teams' colors.
"Excellent eye, Katie," Scarlett complimented while DJ ran to the tree.
"I'm not just a phone addict, y'know," Katie laughed a bit.
"I got the key, everyone," the camera cut to DJ who was in the tree's hollow and holding out a key. He threw the key in front of Dave and Molly.
"Way to go, DJ!" Molly said.
"Now you want to support us," Dave snarked at her. "Where was that when I was frozen?"
"Are you still mad about that?" Molly groaned.
"Of course we are," Katie snorted.
"You don't just leave your teammates behind," Dave lectured.
"Whatever happened happened," Anne Maria got in between them. "Let's focus more on the challenge and less on squabbling right now."
Confessional: Anne Maria
"I'm here to start no fights," Anne Maria confessed. "What Molly did was messed up, but they can scold her after the challenge."
Confessional: Molly
"Thank you, Anne Maria," Molly let out a sigh of relief. "Finally, someone who won't ride on me for my choices!"
Confessionals End
"You're right, Anne Maria," Dave sighed. "We shouldn't waste anymore time fighting."
As Dave bent down to pick up the key, however, a line of spider silk shot down from the treetops, wrapped around Molly, and pulled her up out of sight.
DJ regrouped with his team. "They said they saw something far away, so maybe-" he paused and looked behind his teammates. "Wait, where's Molly?"
The other four looked behind them and gasped. "Oh no, Molly's got taken by the spider!" Dave cried out.
"What do we do now?" Anne Maria griped.
Scarlett sighed. "Not to sound apathetic, but I think we're gonna have to continue on without her."
"Are you sure about that?" Katie questioned.
"I'm sure we can catch up to wherever she's being taken to," Scarlett waved off her concern.
"Well, I hope so," Katie said as she and the team exchanged nervous looks.
Confessional: Dave
"I don't see Molly in the best light right now, but that doesn't mean that I want her to be taken away," Dave began to shudder. "Especially by a spider."
Confessional Ends
"Why are we running so slow when we're in a challenge?" Geoff said as the scene moved back to him, Sierra, Scott, and Leshawna running through the forest. "We won't beat the other team at this rate."
"Relax, I know what I'm doing," Scott conversed with him.
Confessional: Scott
Scott was whittling another piece of wood with his shark tooth. "I'm heading us back into last place where we belong. Another elimination ceremony for the Rats and it's bye-bye Geoff! Or Sierra. I can't decide."
Confessional Ends
"C'mon, let's rock this! With years of exercise and partying, I've got energy to burn!" Geoff said, snatching the key from Leshawna and jogging ahead. The three followed him, but the camera kept its focus on Geoff as he passed a tree stump, then a rock; then stepped on a mysterious clump of dirt… which exploded and sent him flying.
Leshawna, Sierra, and Scott stopped immediately, the shot showing Sierra and Leshawna being shocked and Scott showing delight as Geoff got launched from one land mine to the next off-screen.
During this, however, a line of spider webbing was shot onto Sierra's leg. It quickly wrapped around it and tugged Sierra away from her team.
The camera finally cut back to Geoff, singed and groaning on the ground in an awkward but still holding the Rats' key. The Maggots approached him moments later. "Sorry that had to happen, doll!" Anne Maria comforted as she ran past Geoff.
Scott and Leshawna came to Geoff's need. "You gonna be alright?" Leshawna helped him up.
"I'll walk it off," Geoff tried to remain cool headed.
"Thanks, focus boy," Scott said.
"I don't want to strain my calves," Geoff added.
"We should leave in a few minutes just to make sure we catch up to the other team," Leshawna said. "Sierra just got captured, and I don't want us sticking around here."
\
The scene cut to the lantern-lit cemetery. The camera panned left across its headstones and crosses, several of which were pet-themed, to the entrance as the five remaining Mutant Maggots arrived, huffing and puffing from their run.
"Welcome to the Wawanakwa Pet Cemetery!" Chris greeted them over the loudspeaker.
"We're first. Nice!" Dave said.
"What's the clue?" Anne Maria asked Scarlett.
The camera cut in close as she opened the lid to a small coffin in an open grave, revealing a ragged piece of paper within bearing a list of numbers: 5 in the first row; 5 in the second; 5 in the third. Notably, while most of the numbers were plain black there were three 6s and the 18 were all an eye-catching red. "Three 6's is normally not a good indication of luck," Scarlett said with a nervous look.
"Let's fan out and look for numbers!" DJ said as the perspective cut back to its usual sideview.
"By ourselves?" Anne Maria asked.
\
"I'm in a creepy cemetery in the middle of the woods looking for three 6s. It's no big deal," Anne Maria said warily as she backed through the graveyard. "Good news is, there aren't any owls hooting around. I think I'm safe," she told herself, pausing to smile. "Now, let's see if I can find any numbers..."
She turned around and started examining the nearest headstone, and the shot cut to a view from afar, the footage switching back to infrared. The monster serving as the camera's viewpoint blinked, and when it opened its eyes it had gotten much closer to the jersey girl, and had extended four sharp limbs with tiny claws on the end towards her...
Anne Maria's scream echoed through the cemetery, quickly catching the attention of Katie, DJ, Scarlett, and Dave as they looked up in shock. "Anne Maria?" Dave asked out in concern, the footage quickly skipping ahead to show all four arriving at the location the tanned young lady had been snatched from.
"I could've sworn she was just here," Dave said in confusion.
They all gasped. "Where'd she go?" Katie asked in mild terror.
"I'm just as concerned as you all are," Scarlett started, "but like what happened with Molly, we should move along and hope to catch up with them."
"I know you're trying to be reasonable," DJ said, "but you're rubbing me off the wrong way."
"Yeah, it's like you don't care about what could happen to our teammates," Dave told her.
"I'm just used to not expressing my emotions on occasion," Scarlett told her team members. "Thank you very much."
\
The scene flashed to the Rats, where Scott and Leshawna were next to grimy coffins propped upright against a couple statues.
"Find the souvenir, hide the souvenir, lose the game…" Scott went in to unlock the coffin, but was interrupted by Fang bursting out of the coffin with a menacing grin.
"AAAAHHHHH!" The devious ran away screaming when Fang moved to chase after him.
Geoff was looking at a grave that was open. "This grave smells like french fries. Weird, but I'm not complaining." He got shoved in thanks to Scott running away from Fang.
The camera followed Scott as he ran past two open graves, one of which with a mound of dirt in front of it.
The mutant shark followed his quarry, but when Scott leapt over the mound of dirt, Fang tripped over it. The shark fell into the open grave and growled.
"Why does this graveyard smell like fries?" Katie wondered aloud, following a scent as she walked through the cemetery. She soon came to the pit Geoff was in. "Maybe it's coming from there."
"Hello? Anybody? I need someone to help me down here!" Geoff called out.
Katie backed away a bit. "Did that hole just talk?"
"It's me. Geoff!" Geoff tried to denounce her belief.
"Oh right," Katie sighed in relief. "You're the guy with the cowboy hat."
"That's right," Geoff confirmed her statement. "I fell down this hole, and I'm covered in grease right now."
"So that explains the smell," Katie realized.
"Can you get me out of here?" Geoff begged her. "Grease doesn't mesh well with my shirt."
"I would, but I have to help my team right now," Katie declined. "One of your teammates could get you out. Bye," she left the scene.
"This sucks," Geoff whined, unaware of four maggots coming by the grave. As soon as they saw the grease and Geoff, they jumped in and attacked him, making him howl in agony.
\
The scene cut to Chris, who was watching feeds of both teams on a trio of monitors and laughing hysterically. "Will anyone make it to the spooky cave?" he turned and asked the camera, holding a covered cup with a straw in it. "And if so, how can they possibly make it all the way to the finish line? Less brain, more pain, when we return!" he said, finishing with a sip of his drink.
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(Commercial Break)
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submitted by xtremexavier15 to u/xtremexavier15 [link] [comments]
Mutant Maggots: Anne Maria, Katie, Molly, Scarlett, Dave, DJ
Episode 04: Finders Creepers
"Last time, on Total Drama Revenge of the Island!" Chris opened over a stock shot of the camp, the recap montage starting off with a clip of the contestants racing off towards the side of Mt. Looming Tragedy. "Twelve bumbling buffoons battled it out in a brutal buffet of bombastica," Chef was shown gleefully dropping ice blocks on the climbing campers, catching Geoff and Scott but narrowly missing Molly and almost catching Anne Maria.
"Why all the 'B' words?" B was shown demonstrating his couch invention created from junk, "Because, B proved he was a brave and brilliant improviser who scored big time for his team!" B used an ice pick to poke holes onto a shard of ice and placed it on top of the castle, directing the sun beam towards the Maggots' base and melting it effectively. "Until his bitter teammate Scott allowed brainy Molly to botch it on purpose and B got the boot," Molly threw a snowball onto the shard, melting the castle and B was shown being flung into the night.
"And now," Chris said, popping up in front of a shot of the full moon in a cloudy sky with a lit candle in his hand, marking the end of the recap montage, "tonight's challenge is about fear." He made a devilish look. "And everyone knows fear is a dish best served, in the dark!" he said in an exaggeratedly spooky manner, an eerie sound playing as he laughed evilly. "Huh?" he stopped suddenly, the camera pulling back to reveal Chef standing next to him...dressed like a showgirl with lots of peacock feathers. "Chef!" the host said in annoyance.
"Wardrobe was all out of vampire costumes," Chef explained as the series's capstone then began to play.
"It's all scary!" Chris said, walking off to the left. "Other than that," he scowled and gestured back toward his off-screen assistant. "Right here! Right now!" he resumed his usual demeanor. "On Total! Drama! Revenge, of the Island!" He adopted his spooky tone as he finished the title, and ended with another evil laugh.
XXXXX
Frogs and crickets chirped and croaked, joined by an owl's hoots as the episode opened on a shot of the full moon. The camera panned down to the cabins as the sound of snoring was added to the nighttime mix, and the scene cut inside to the girls' side of the Maggots' cabin where Anne Maria and Katie were sleeping peacefully in the bunk they shared. Dave and DJ were also shown sound asleep on the boys' side, and the scene cut to the Rat boys to show Geoff also sound asleep.
The camera cut next to show Sammy waking up with a yawn. She stretched her arms out for a few good seconds and fell right back to sleep...until the sudden shrill wail of a blow horn pierced the air.
"RUN! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!" Chris hollered from off-screen as the scene cut back outside, the blowhorn continuing even over the panicked shouts of the campers.
The camera briefly cut to a close-up of the blowhorn still blowing, then over to the Maggots' cabin as they ran outside fully dressed – first Katie screaming "What's happening?!"; then DJ just screaming; then Scarlett yelling out "This is unethical!"; then Anne Maria just hollering; and then finally Dave coming out, calling out "I'm wide awake!"
The Rats were shown next, Scott grunting "Me first!" as he shoved Geoff down the stairs and slid down the railing; Leshawna quickly running after him; Sammy screaming at the top of her lungs; and Trent coming out last at around the same time while screaming.
They assembled nervously in the common area between cabins, where Chris – wearing a pair of heavy earmuffs – finally eased up on the blowhorn. "Glad you all could make it," he grinned as he took off his headgear.
Molly soon arrived later. "Is there an attack or what?" she asked her teammates.
Katie shot her a quick glare. "Of course not, but why would you care about anything but yourself?"
Confessional: Molly
"Olay, yes," Molly moaned. "I left my teammates behind, but that was because I wanted to win the challenge first. I was always taught to focus on one thing before moving on to the next, and that's what I did." She grew concerned. "I don't see any problems with that."
Confessional Ends
"I hope you're all ready," Chris continued, "'cause it's challenge time!" He stepped to the side as Chef rolled up a large widescreen television on a wheeled cart. It was currently displaying an aerial map of the island with several additional colored icons – six bright green skulls scattered around the island; three yellowish envelopes over the campfire pit, the western edge of the campgrounds, and deeper into the forest; and a large purple spider in the middle of it all.
"We're gonna do a challenge?" Anne Maria wondered. "In the middle of the woods? At night?"
Confessional: Anne Maria
"Doesn't Chris know that we need our hours of sleep?" Anne Maria criticized. "I haven't even done my hair."
Confessional Ends
"Your challenge," Chris continued as though there'd been no interruption, "a scavenger hunt for three creepy souvenirs. Your locations? A haunted forest," he walked across to the other side of the television, "a scaaary pet cemetery, and an extra spooktastic cave. First team to each location gets a special clue," he said, the camera zooming in as he pointed towards the westernmost letter icon on the screen. "But watch out for booby traps," he added jovially as he moved his finger to one of the skulls, "I really went to town with them, heheh." The campers were shown watching warily.
"So move fast," the host added, "and stick together. You'll be penalized for each player you lose!"
"Umm, what's with the giant spider?" Sammy asked.
"Oh yeah," Chris answered as the shot zoomed in on the icon in question, "there's some kinda gigantic mutated spider sorta running around loose on the island."
The cast immediately started to voice their fears and protests.
"A huge, humongous spider is on the loose?!" DJ hugged Katie out of fear.
"I guess so," Katie said frightfully, but was secretly enjoying DJ hugging her.
The shot zoomed in on Dave in particular as he looked around, moaning "Oh no..." in annoyance.
Confessional: Dave
"Ever since I was a kid, I've never been a huge fan of spiders," Dave admitted. "They leave messy webs everywhere they go, and it takes me a long time to clean them up in places like my uncle's attic or my aunt's basement." A spider soon crawled down on a string. "This is gonna be unpopular, but I'm not a huge fan of Spider-Man because of my dislike of spiders." The spider hissed after hearing the criticism, making Dave flinch.
Confessional: Leshawna
"I may seem fearless on the outside, but spiders are one of the few things I'm terrified of," Leshawna said nervously. "Anything with eight legs is frightening enough."
Confessional Ends
"And since I want to keep things fair for both teams," Chris continued, "I decided to bring back an eliminated contestant for the Rats."
"It's so good to be back here!" the familiar voice of Sierra was heard, becoming more recognizable when she ran next to Chris.
"Sierra! I haven't introduced you yet!" Chris snapped at her.
"If I waited any longer, the episode would've been past the usual 22-minute runtime," Sierra explained. "I'll just go join the Toxic Rats and save you the trouble of doing so since I've rejoined."
Chris watched the fangirl run up to the contestants in annoyance. "Long story short, Sierra is the returnee." Chris regained his smile, and the dramatic and almost heroic tune started playing again. "There's nothing to fear but mortal terror itself! Talk soon," he added impishly, sounding his blowhorn once again.
The twelve campers ran off towards the woods.
\
The footage flashed ahead to another shot of the full moon over the forested hills of Wawanakwa, an owl hooting as the scene cut down to ground level. The logo of the Toxic Rats appeared in the corner of the screen just before the team itself did, running up and stopping in front of a tree with a loudspeaker set up in its branches.
"We're in first place! Sweet!" Geoff cheered just before the loudspeaker whined into activity.
"Welcome to the Haunted Forest!" Chris announced over it, the shot panning downward to show the six Rats gathering around a small crack in the ground. "Your clue can be found at the base of this tree!" Sierra reached into the hole...and screamed in pain as something metallic snapped inside the hole.
"Inside a bear trap," Chris finished his announcement with a laugh.
Sierra withdrew her hand from the hole, the trap clamped down firmly on her arm – though she was at least clutching a note in her hand. "Here! Read the clue," she said, passing it to a mildly shocked Sammy. Just as she was about to read it, the sound of approaching footsteps distracted her and her teammates.
"Bad news guys," Anne Maria commented from the six Maggots. "They have the clue."
"Even with a team advantage they still managed to beat us," Katie reminded them.
"We can let the opposing team have their clue," Scarlett said, looking back towards her teammates. "I have another plan," she said, running ahead with her teammates in tow.
\
The shot cut to the Maggots as they stopped at a clearing further along the trail. "So what's the plan?" Katie asked the girl in front.
"Find a place to hide so we can follow the Rats and their clue to our first souvenir," Scarlett answered. "Into that bush!"
The Maggots dived and painfully tried to hide in a thorn bush.
"Be quiet," Dave hissed, "They're coming."
"Inside a knot is a nest," Sammy read as the scene cut to the Rats. "Your souvenir lives with a pest. Find Polaris to travel northwest? Polaris is the North Star."
"The North Star is right there, so this way's northwest! There's a path!" Trent declared. He ran off, the rest of his teammates following suit.
"Now we follow!" Scarlett declared as the rest of her teammates came out of the bush.
\
The Rats' logo reappeared as the footage skipped ahead again to them running along through the woods.
"Inside a knot is a nest," Geoff muttered to himself as the shot zoomed in on him. "Hey Sammy, what was the rest of that poem again?" he called back without taking his eyes off the path ahead.
When he didn't get an answer he immediately skidded to a stop. "Sammy?!" he yelled in rising panic, and looked back to see nobody behind him.
The shot cut back to show that the rest of the Rats had stopped in their tracks. "What? Did we lose the mouse?" Scott asked.
Geoff gulped. "We get a penalty for each player we lose, right?" he asked nervously.
"And there's a spider crawling around, right?!" Leshawna said in panic. The shot cut outward as he did so, showing a large purple spider crawling down through the shadows of the forest trees.
"We're looking for a knot with a nest, right?" Scott looked off to the right; the camera quick-panned over to a large tree with a noticeable hollow knot in the trunk with the hints of a nest inside; a few green and red marks had been spray-painted on the bark under it.
"There it is!" Leshawna said, immediately rushing towards it.
"But what about Sammy?" Trent asked his team.
"We'll look for her after we get the souvenir," Sierra assured him.
Leshawna started climbing up the trunk as the rest of her team ran up to join her, and soon began to root through the tree hollow with one arm.
Suddenly, a large eye opened up inside the hollow and stared directly at Leshawna. She screamed, and several squid-like tentacles reached out of the tree's other hollows. One quickly grabbed her around the neck and held her up, while another gave her a few wet slaps then poked her in the eye.
"My eye!" Leshawna yelped in pain and terror. In response the tentacle tightened its grip, and Leshawna began to choke.
"What do we do!?" Sierra yelled in panic.
Geoff looked around, then bent down and picked up a handful of small rocks. "We can throw these stones at the octo guy!"
"Good idea!" Scott said as he and his team picked up rocks of their own and began throwing them at the creature, but they seemed to be hitting Leshawna more than the mutant squid-tree monster. Eventually, the thing just raised its captive up even higher, then slammed her down onto the ground and hissed at the others.
"RUN!" Geoff shouted, turning to flee as a tentacle shot towards them, forcing them to scatter.
Unfortunately, Trent was unable to get away in time and was lifted up by the leg. Trent cried in pain as the mutant began to punch him in the stomach with a curled-up tentacle.
The sounds of pain and wet punches caused Leshawna to get frustrated. "No way am I gonna get pushed around or let a squid attack my teammates!" she declared, getting back on her feet and climbing up the tree-squid's trunk while it was distracted. "Quit buggin' us!" she cried as she punched the mutant in the eye.
The beast bellowed in pain, dropping Trent and retracting into its tree. As soon as he got back up, a strand of spider's webbing shot down from above, sticking on to his head and pulling him away from the floor.
Leshawna reached into the knot once again, quickly and triumphantly pulling out a brass key. "And that's how I roll!" she called down to her teammates.
She dropped down to the forest floor, and landed in front of Geoff, who grinned when he saw it. "We got the key, Trent." Geoff received no response as Scott rejoined.
"Trent?!" Leshawna yelled out in concern. "Where are you?!"
As she panicked, the shot changed to a perspective further away, and the footage switched to an infrared shot of the four Rats.
"Guess he's gone," Sierra sighed sadly. "On the plus side, we found the key."
"We lost two players!" Leshawna said. "Shouldn't we go and look for them?"
"Knowing Chris, he probably has them trapped someplace else, so I'm not too worried right now," Scott brushed it off.
"You've got a point there," Geoff agreed.
Just then, the six Maggots arrived on the scene.
Scott was the first to notice them. "No luck here," he quickly said with faux disappointment, "Do you want to see if Sammy and Trent saw anything better over there?" he looked back and asked Sierra, Leshawna, and Geoff.
"Absolutely. It's not just the three of us," Sierra caught on before they turned and ran off.
"I see something!" Katie pointed off to the camera's right – the direction of the squid-tree. "Team colors!" The camera briefly cut over to the knot in question, with a focus on the marks below it in the two teams' colors.
"Excellent eye, Katie," Scarlett complimented while DJ ran to the tree.
"I'm not just a phone addict, y'know," Katie laughed a bit.
"I got the key, everyone," the camera cut to DJ who was in the tree's hollow and holding out a key. He threw the key in front of Dave and Molly.
"Way to go, DJ!" Molly said.
"Now you want to support us," Dave snarked at her. "Where was that when I was frozen?"
"Are you still mad about that?" Molly groaned.
"Of course we are," Katie snorted.
"You don't just leave your teammates behind," Dave lectured.
"Whatever happened happened," Anne Maria got in between them. "Let's focus more on the challenge and less on squabbling right now."
Confessional: Anne Maria
"I'm here to start no fights," Anne Maria confessed. "What Molly did was messed up, but they can scold her after the challenge."
Confessional: Molly
"Thank you, Anne Maria," Molly let out a sigh of relief. "Finally, someone who won't ride on me for my choices!"
Confessionals End
"You're right, Anne Maria," Dave sighed. "We shouldn't waste anymore time fighting."
As Dave bent down to pick up the key, however, a line of spider silk shot down from the treetops, wrapped around Molly, and pulled her up out of sight.
DJ regrouped with his team. "They said they saw something far away, so maybe-" he paused and looked behind his teammates. "Wait, where's Molly?"
The other four looked behind them and gasped. "Oh no, Molly's got taken by the spider!" Dave cried out.
"What do we do now?" Anne Maria griped.
Scarlett sighed. "Not to sound apathetic, but I think we're gonna have to continue on without her."
"Are you sure about that?" Katie questioned.
"I'm sure we can catch up to wherever she's being taken to," Scarlett waved off her concern.
"Well, I hope so," Katie said as she and the team exchanged nervous looks.
Confessional: Dave
"I don't see Molly in the best light right now, but that doesn't mean that I want her to be taken away," Dave began to shudder. "Especially by a spider."
Confessional Ends
"Why are we running so slow when we're in a challenge?" Geoff said as the scene moved back to him, Sierra, Scott, and Leshawna running through the forest. "We won't beat the other team at this rate."
"Relax, I know what I'm doing," Scott conversed with him.
Confessional: Scott
Scott was whittling another piece of wood with his shark tooth. "I'm heading us back into last place where we belong. Another elimination ceremony for the Rats and it's bye-bye Geoff! Or Sierra. I can't decide."
Confessional Ends
"C'mon, let's rock this! With years of exercise and partying, I've got energy to burn!" Geoff said, snatching the key from Leshawna and jogging ahead. The three followed him, but the camera kept its focus on Geoff as he passed a tree stump, then a rock; then stepped on a mysterious clump of dirt… which exploded and sent him flying.
Leshawna, Sierra, and Scott stopped immediately, the shot showing Sierra and Leshawna being shocked and Scott showing delight as Geoff got launched from one land mine to the next off-screen.
During this, however, a line of spider webbing was shot onto Sierra's leg. It quickly wrapped around it and tugged Sierra away from her team.
The camera finally cut back to Geoff, singed and groaning on the ground in an awkward but still holding the Rats' key. The Maggots approached him moments later. "Sorry that had to happen, doll!" Anne Maria comforted as she ran past Geoff.
Scott and Leshawna came to Geoff's need. "You gonna be alright?" Leshawna helped him up.
"I'll walk it off," Geoff tried to remain cool headed.
"Thanks, focus boy," Scott said.
"I don't want to strain my calves," Geoff added.
"We should leave in a few minutes just to make sure we catch up to the other team," Leshawna said. "Sierra just got captured, and I don't want us sticking around here."
\
The scene cut to the lantern-lit cemetery. The camera panned left across its headstones and crosses, several of which were pet-themed, to the entrance as the five remaining Mutant Maggots arrived, huffing and puffing from their run.
"Welcome to the Wawanakwa Pet Cemetery!" Chris greeted them over the loudspeaker.
"We're first. Nice!" Dave said.
"What's the clue?" Anne Maria asked Scarlett.
The camera cut in close as she opened the lid to a small coffin in an open grave, revealing a ragged piece of paper within bearing a list of numbers: 5 in the first row; 5 in the second; 5 in the third. Notably, while most of the numbers were plain black there were three 6s and the 18 were all an eye-catching red. "Three 6's is normally not a good indication of luck," Scarlett said with a nervous look.
"Let's fan out and look for numbers!" DJ said as the perspective cut back to its usual sideview.
"By ourselves?" Anne Maria asked.
\
"I'm in a creepy cemetery in the middle of the woods looking for three 6s. It's no big deal," Anne Maria said warily as she backed through the graveyard. "Good news is, there aren't any owls hooting around. I think I'm safe," she told herself, pausing to smile. "Now, let's see if I can find any numbers..."
She turned around and started examining the nearest headstone, and the shot cut to a view from afar, the footage switching back to infrared. The monster serving as the camera's viewpoint blinked, and when it opened its eyes it had gotten much closer to the jersey girl, and had extended four sharp limbs with tiny claws on the end towards her...
Anne Maria's scream echoed through the cemetery, quickly catching the attention of Katie, DJ, Scarlett, and Dave as they looked up in shock. "Anne Maria?" Dave asked out in concern, the footage quickly skipping ahead to show all four arriving at the location the tanned young lady had been snatched from.
"I could've sworn she was just here," Dave said in confusion.
They all gasped. "Where'd she go?" Katie asked in mild terror.
"I'm just as concerned as you all are," Scarlett started, "but like what happened with Molly, we should move along and hope to catch up with them."
"I know you're trying to be reasonable," DJ said, "but you're rubbing me off the wrong way."
"Yeah, it's like you don't care about what could happen to our teammates," Dave told her.
"I'm just used to not expressing my emotions on occasion," Scarlett told her team members. "Thank you very much."
\
The scene flashed to the Rats, where Scott and Leshawna were next to grimy coffins propped upright against a couple statues.
"Find the souvenir, hide the souvenir, lose the game…" Scott went in to unlock the coffin, but was interrupted by Fang bursting out of the coffin with a menacing grin.
"AAAAHHHHH!" The devious ran away screaming when Fang moved to chase after him.
Geoff was looking at a grave that was open. "This grave smells like french fries. Weird, but I'm not complaining." He got shoved in thanks to Scott running away from Fang.
The camera followed Scott as he ran past two open graves, one of which with a mound of dirt in front of it.
The mutant shark followed his quarry, but when Scott leapt over the mound of dirt, Fang tripped over it. The shark fell into the open grave and growled.
"Why does this graveyard smell like fries?" Katie wondered aloud, following a scent as she walked through the cemetery. She soon came to the pit Geoff was in. "Maybe it's coming from there."
"Hello? Anybody? I need someone to help me down here!" Geoff called out.
Katie backed away a bit. "Did that hole just talk?"
"It's me. Geoff!" Geoff tried to denounce her belief.
"Oh right," Katie sighed in relief. "You're the guy with the cowboy hat."
"That's right," Geoff confirmed her statement. "I fell down this hole, and I'm covered in grease right now."
"So that explains the smell," Katie realized.
"Can you get me out of here?" Geoff begged her. "Grease doesn't mesh well with my shirt."
"I would, but I have to help my team right now," Katie declined. "One of your teammates could get you out. Bye," she left the scene.
"This sucks," Geoff whined, unaware of four maggots coming by the grave. As soon as they saw the grease and Geoff, they jumped in and attacked him, making him howl in agony.
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The scene cut to Chris, who was watching feeds of both teams on a trio of monitors and laughing hysterically. "Will anyone make it to the spooky cave?" he turned and asked the camera, holding a covered cup with a straw in it. "And if so, how can they possibly make it all the way to the finish line? Less brain, more pain, when we return!" he said, finishing with a sip of his drink.
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(Commercial Break)
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2023.06.04 19:16 Party_Condition_1132 Green carved out eyeshadow ftw 💚
 | Green is easily becoming my favorite color ✨✨ submitted by Party_Condition_1132 to MakeupAddiction [link] [comments] Look by the talented @trinitheii Products used: @beautybaycom dark fantasy pallete in "slime" "spaced" and "code" @isamayabeauty wild star pallete in "woa" and "rodeo" @colourpopcosmetics fade into hue pallete in the shade "designer" @beautybaycom liquid cream blush in "blooming" topped by @essence_cosmetics blush in "beloved @sheinofficial Pointed Cat Eye False Eyelashes @nyxcosmetics suede lip liner in "cappuccino" ombre with @beautybaycom liquid cream blush in "blooming" topped by @doseofcolors desi × Katy lipgloss in "The most" @doseofcolors highlighter in the shade "heat" @colourpopcosmetics tinted moisturizer in " medium 9 W" and "light 7W" @nyxcosmetics bare with me concealer in "vanilla" @nyxcosmetics Micro Brow Pencil in "cool ash brown" @fentybeauty sun stalk'r Instand warmth bronzer in "shady biz" @elfcosmetics halo glow setting powder in "light" @fentybeauty invisimatte instant setting + blotting powder. |
2023.06.04 19:14 Downtown-Locksmith41 Gutter crutch platform style
 | I was told that the arthritis community was the place to ask about these and alike... I have a bad wrist on the side I use My cane and am looking for an alternative to take the weight off my hand. I am just looking for opinions/recommendations about styles and types. I have already lost most of my mobility and this will be the final nail in its coffin if I can't find an alternative soon. submitted by Downtown-Locksmith41 to ArthritisMobility [link] [comments] |