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Karma4Free
2019.01.05 04:36 xevetv Karma4Free
A place to earn karma! Be sure to read the rules before posting. :)
2013.10.25 14:59 grumpycateight Talking about older women/younger men relationships
READ THE FAQ & RULES BEFORE POSTING OR COMMENTING! A safe space to trade experiences, frustrations, worries, analyze cultural reactions, or just chat with fellow cougars and cubs. Working definition: a cougacub relationship is one where the woman (cougar) is a woman of 40 who at least 10 years older than the man (cub) or woman (kitten). A woman under 40 is a Puma.
2008.01.26 21:33 Women
A safe, respectful space to discuss the lives and stories of women of all backgrounds, and the current events which affect us. Trans people and especially trans feminine people are expressly welcome here. People of all genders are welcome; feminist cred appreciated. Shaming women's choices and invalidating the perspectives of other women is not allowed here. Respect other life choices. We are baby and childless friendly. We are housewife and working woman friendly.
2023.06.08 06:54 mpopecantcope Someone in the system keeps creating new identities that are the real him
This alter was here from almost the beginning. He made those in the system feel special. He was very pleasant within the system, with ultra thick skin for dealing with any of our moods. He sometimes changes moods- but is generally super lovable and easy to be around. He is by far the most attractive one to society and also just gets taken for granted. He is the most humble and sweet alter, with a charming sense of humor. I worry about one of the new patterns he's adopted. . Now he creates new "toys" for whenever he fronts. Yeah sounds ok... yea no. One of his creations was a racist bigoted type. It was a very believable identity. But apparently just him playing. Another were two bottles- one of ketchup & one of mustard. And theyd argue over who is the better condiment for way too long. Another person he created had an AA meeting to go to which is weird because I never really was a big drinker. Maybe I am one and need to figure it out?? Lol.
I'm kind of finding humor in my new alter but change is always hard. And after so many yrs of living a certain way, I am not really crazy about this 360 of a change. Of course blame is not something I would ever do- I believe in curiosity.
One more thing- on impulse, got him a nice remote controlled car that in theory, he would have loved. But I guess he completely left it alone :/
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2023.06.08 06:53 TaxCommon3474 my brother is six years old and i am so tired
For context, he's twelve years younger than me. I'm very close to him because during the lockdown, 3 years-old lang siya, and we spent aaaaall day everyday together for the past three years.
Kaso putangina pagod na pagod na ako. My mother and father are very busy with work kaya ako nagpapakain, nagpapaligo, at nakikipaglaro sa kapatid ko. I barely have time for myself since summer started since he's getting older at wala siya masyadong kaibigan. It's worse because I'm with him from the moment I wake up to the moment I sleep.
My biggest problem comes from how bratty he's being. I acknowledge that it's how my parents are raising him—very spoilt, laging pinagbibigyan—but he's always kind with THEM and not with me. He's bratty and annoying and demanding and disrespectful.
I'm tired. I love him so much—we play everyday, I talk with him everyday, I paint and make art and play video games with him—but I'm so, so, so tired.
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2023.06.08 06:53 mountwhitney Project Autumn
2023.06.08 06:53 hideouszondarg Hubris, Boston, and Everything After
I know this is a little late for a Boston recap and
very long for a casual read (consider yourself warned). It’s kind-of about the race, but it’s also just a bunch of semi-connected thoughts and feelings about training, injury, and results that have been floating around for me over the last couple months.
Prologue
I started running during the pandemic, transitioning away from my long-time sport of Ultimate Frisbee to try to run a sub-5 mile (report
here). I did it, and it was good. And I had caught the running bug. Ready to extend my distances, I declared to my coach that my next goal (after a short hiatus to play one more season of frisbee) was to qualify for Boston. Boston was, in fact, the only marathon I had ever spectated: I remember sitting at Coolidge Corner in 2009, watching runners speed by. I was young and springy then, and had no desire to run farther than 3 miles continuously. But now it was 2021, and time had run out on my fast-twitch abilities: it was time to go long. I wanted to run Boston, which meant I had to run something else - and hopefully just one “something else” - first.
We decided to target Eugene for 2022, to qualify for Boston in 2023. I began building up my base in the fall, testing my weekly mileage limits. I remember a “long run” of 70 minutes the first Sunday after I returned to regular running. I nearly gave up and walked 60 minutes in. But the next Sunday I did 80 minutes, and it was better. By the end of the fall, I was comfortably hitting 50 mpw and 2 hour runs. By the time Eugene came around, I had sixteen weeks of generally healthy training and six 20+ mile runs in my legs. felt ready, and I was: I ran a 2:42. I was a freshly minted 36 at the time, so with the BQ time for my age group and gender at 3:05, I was firmly in the clear.
I want to pause here to say that although I know I’m far from an elite runner, and always will be, I am also keenly aware that many people work their asses off for years to qualify for Boston, and that some never do. I worked hard, too, and my history of sports can’t have hurt, but at the end of the day I know I have some (unearned) talent for running that made my path to Hopkinton easier than it is for many. I will leave it here in saying that I have immense respect for everyone who laces up and puts in the work, regardless of their pace and outcome.
The Build
After Eugene, I had turned my attention away from the roads for about six months. I put the bank of fitness I had developed to work on trails and on mountains. I got to cover (and bonk on) a few of the many thrilling backcountry objectives in British Columbia, and even ran a 50k in Washington. (It went about as well as most people’s first 50k, which is to say that I ran out of food, water, fully supermanned down a trail, cramped every muscle in my lower body, and shuffled it in. Huge success.) But when December came around, it was time to get back to the roads.
Working with the same coach, my road fitness came back surprisingly quickly. I was hitting high-water marks for volume, pushing my average up to the high 60s/low 70s. I felt, well, not good, but I did feel fast. I remember hammering out a 30 minute tempo on the track at 5:41/mi, a workout I never would have been capable of during the Eugene build. I was tired after, but confident and elated. I got compliments from the youngsters rolling 600 repeats around the track, and their coach. I felt like I was on track for a new PR, and not just a PR but a crushingly fast time, maybe somewhere in the mid 2:30s. But somewhere, offscreen, ominous music played. I had my wings on, and I was headed towards the sun.
The sun took the form of a work trip to Bozeman. I flew over Thursday, found a gym to do a tough 60 minute “mountain fitness” workout that evening, ran for an hour Friday morning in the snow, and skate skied 2.5 hours hard on Saturday. Sunday morning, I took on a treadmill workout that was something like 7x(7 min @ 5:41/mi, 2 min off). After two intervals, I knew I didn’t have it. I stepped off the treadmill. I’ve failed workouts in the past, and I’ve been able to move on, but for some reason this one stuck. It stuck, as they say in the South in my craw. Annoyed, I went back to my hotel room and tried to regroup. With my muscles already starting to tighten up with the effort, I resolved to partially salvage the day with an easy run around town. But it didn’t feel like I had salvaged anything. So, after an 8-hour, two hopper flight home, I made another attempt to soothe my bruised ego. With night falling, I hit the pavement, starting out easy but picking up speed. Tired, tight, and without any food or water, I hammered away, deep in the no-man’s land of Zone 3. I had heard the warnings. I paid no heed. I was invincible, and I was going to reclaim the fitness I had missed out on that morning. I ran the distance of a half marathon and got home after dark, and you know what? It felt good, at the time. It felt
The Injury
The next morning, I woke up in a pile of melted wings. My left leg couldn’t take any weight without shooting pain and was tender to the touch around my mid-shin. I felt the dubious benefit of immediate and regretful clarity on what had gone wrong. My ego had let me believe that I could or should try nail a workout on a foreign treadmill at altitude (Bozeman!) after an exhausting couple of days. Failing that, it had convinced me that I should make up the workout with a long, unfueled run. Ego is a hell of drug.
It took several days for me to accept that I was injured. Looking back on my training log, it seems insane, but I ran the next few days on my program, including a track workout. My leg would throb and ache, but I would get through it, only to wake up in more pain that would abate just enough for me to try it out again that afternoon. Eventually, I fessed up to my coach and she immediately sent me to a PT and had me stop running for a week. I thought this was excessive at the time, but in retrospect I think it might have saved the build. The PT I saw said I had a stress reaction, probably brought on by a combination of weak glutes (it’s always the glutes) changing my push off and some good old-fashioned overdoing it.
For the next month, I cross trained with uphill biking, skate skiing, and water jogging. We re-introduced running gradually, starting with once every three days, then every other day, then two out of three days. The shin seemed to get better slowly, and we gradually reached a kind of homeostasis: I knew how far I could push it, and as long as I didn’t overdo it, it seemed to recover slightly faster every time. But the injury had come at a bad time, and missing most of February meant that I couldn’t race the local half marathon I had planned on or a local trail race (though I still participated in them as long runs).
By mid-March, I was feeling mostly better. In addition to Boston, I had also signed up for Chuckanut 50k, a trail ultra renowned for its smooth runnable trails and its timing: it often drew some of the elites of US trail running as an early season opener. I didn’t feel quite ready to hammer the downhills, but if anything, limiting myself kept my quads intact almost through the end of the race. I didn’t tear the roof off, but I ran most of the way and felt pretty good doing it. When I woke up the next day with the usual soreness, but no acute pain in my shin, I knew I was going to finish the build and run an honest race at Boston.
The only problem was that a week’s recovery brought me to March 24: only about three weeks before Boston. With a weeklong taper, shorter than usual by necessity, we really only had two weeks to get into Boston shape. My coach put on a masterclass in programming: she designed workouts that required exactly as much as I could give at the time, while preparing me for the unique qualities of the Boston experience and course. One in particular stands out: 4x(15 min MP effort, 8 min T effort, 4 min jog), but on a route that included a 300-foot hill, which I ended up going up and down 3 times. The key was to maintain effort going uphill, but to not go any faster than 6:10/mile downhill. That and another long run gave me two 20+ milers in the books. That was it.
Going into Boston, I knew I didn’t have the sharpness I had even three months ago. I had started the cycle hoping to PR, maybe by a lot, but before the marathon I set more conservative goals: my C goal was to get to 20 miles (where my mom would be) feeling strong; my B goal was to get under 2:45. My A goal was to PR. I wasn’t feeling brave: I wanted to minimize the possibility of blowing up, while still giving myself a fighting chance at a one-second PR if I was having a really good day.
The Marathon
There’s not much to say about Boston (the marathon) that readers here haven’t read before. The logistics are impeccable, but overwhelming for a first-timer, the fanfare and the fans are legendary, and the course is the running world’s version of the Strait of Messina: athletes must navigate Scylla’s ego-tempting downhills and Charybdis’ ill-timed uphills to survive. While it is literally impossible to make it to the Boston marathon start line without having at least one hundred people tell you to not hammer the downhill at the start, people still do it every single year.
In a way, I was lucky have reckoned with (and lost to) my ego early in the build. I came to Boston healthy but wary of too much self-belief. We set a target and hard limit on the pace I would set through the first 15k: 6:15s would be ideal, but at most 6:10s: I wouldn’t run faster than I had down my training hill. At the start line, a small inspiration struck. Boston sets bib numbers by qualifying time, and my 2:42 at Eugene gave me something in the 1100s. Within my corral, I found the people around my number and then walked about 30 meters back, placing myself closer to folks wearing 1500s. I reasoned that if most people overcooked the start, then I wanted to be with the folks overcooking it at a pace I could be comfortable with.
Once the race started, it was virtually impossible, for the first couple miles or so, to shift my pace much above or below what the people around me wanted to run. If thought at first that I had let myself sit too far back: I ran a 6:35 first mile down the two-lane streets of Hopkinton. But as the crowds thinned a bit, I found a rhythm, and clicked off my first 5k at around 19:14, around a 6:12/mile pace. The next 5k, still downhill but slightly less, was a 19:12. The third was 19:13. Rolling through the small towns that make up the western side of the Boston metro area, I didn’t feel good, exactly, but I also didn’t feel bad. I wasn’t sure what kind of day I was having. That’s the odd thing about the marathon, so far as I can tell: you might know you’re having a bad day early on, but deciding that you’re having a good day is inviting disaster.
A quick aside: it can’t be overstated how impressive the Boston crowds are. There was no point on the course that I can remember where we were without support for more than 25 meters. Wellesley and Boston University are extreme even in that context, though: you actually feel the roar at those points in the course before you hear or see it. Bless you, you drunk and joyful undergraduates.
By 25k, we were through half and quickly approaching the Newton Hills. After a long downhill, we turned at the fire station and started to charge up. I shortened my stride and began to pump my arms, lifting my effort from a 6 to a 7 but no higher. I didn’t look at my watch until the end of the first hill, so you can imagine my shock when I saw that the last mile had been a 6:06. I cruised the lengthy downhill after the first hill (nobody really tells you about those) and regained my composure. The second hill was punchier, and brought me down to a 6:10, but I still felt good, and was starting to pass quite a few people. The third hill was mostly forgettable, which left only Heartbreak. While not objectively a big hill, it’s big enough for that point in a marathon, and you definitely see it coming. I was determined to hold my early race pace through it, though, and pushed the effort up again. I was breathing hard, but I got to the top still holding a 6:11 pace.
Even at the top of Heartbreak, I wasn’t fully ready to believe that this was going to be a really good day. I’m told that much better runners have lost entire races in the so-called “haunted” mile following Heartbreak, and I wasn’t sure what my quads had left in the tank. But while it still didn’t feel good, I kept pouring in gas and they kept responding. The last few miles of the race are a bit of a blur: I remember pushing the pace down to 6:06, then 6:00, then even below 6:00 for a mile or so. There are a couple very short and punchy climbs just before the last turns that took something out of me, but by the time I turned left on Boylston I knew I had enough in the tank. I started sprinting at the turn, only to realize that 600m was a lot more than I had bargained for. Still, I turned in a respectable finish, and at least on the video it looks like I’m booking it. The last mile was a 5:41, exactly what I had worked on maintaining early in the build.
I finished in 2:40: something and negative split by about 2 minutes. It felt good. It felt bad. It poured like crazy 15 minutes after, while I huddled under a restaurant awning. I watched other runners come in. Some, like me, had the elation of a good day to soothe their tired muscles and joints. Some had no such balm, and were left to tangle with the aftermath of a long cycle with a disappointing final result. I was reminded, too, that it’s all relative: as I sat under the awning, I heard a runner near me lament his 2:35, while another came in at 3:15 and was fully elated. Kipchoge had a bad day, and he finished more than half an hour before I did. We are comparison machines, and expectations versus reality is the most fundamental comparison of them all.
Epilogue
The marathon is a harsh race, and I feel genuinely lucky to have come out ahead both times I’ve tried. Two months on though, my body still feels beat up: I’m struggling to recover, my knees ache, and my workouts seem to be going the wrong direction. I don’t think I gave my recovery the respect it deserved, so I am once again tangling with my own hubris.
Assuming I can rest enough to properly recover, I also find myself in the position of figuring out what’s next. Boston was a big goal for me, and I didn’t set any real running objectives after it. All I have on my schedule this summer is a couple of local trail and road races. I thought Boston would be my last marathon before I moved entirely to the more forgiving pastures of trail running, but I’m also tempted to see how far I can push the needle on my road running before age claws my aerobic fitness back from me. I’m 37 now, and keenly aware that at some point the PRs will no longer be on the table, but I think that day is still a few years off. If you were me, what would you aim for next?
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2023.06.08 06:53 Loud_Risk4757 Instead of matching my level what if you were matched by average deck level?
To make the game more enjoyable for people who want to experience different decks without spending outrageous amount of money on ladder what if supercell matched players by avg. card level. So players with an avg lvl 11/12 cards match with similar players around an avg 11-13 level cards. This would be easier for newer players to pick up the game so they aren’t destroyed by lvl 14 ebarbs Wizard, mega knight etc. The match making idea would not be strict and have some leeway so leveling cards still is something to work for. What do you think?
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2023.06.08 06:53 Dry-Name-4721 WhatsApp
Hello All,
I have a supervisor who is insistent on messaging through what’s app instead of email, or phone call.
I am currently on an inactive period until the end of the summer at my workplace and she has just sent me a WhatsApp message, am I obligated to answer this? If she calls am I obligated to answer this too?
I am currently laid off due to a shortage of work but have signed a letter saying that I have an estimated re appointment date at the end of august. Does this mean I am currently still employed and under the same obligations as if I was currently working or since I was laid off am I unemployed?
I am located in Canada. This supervisor is nutritious for not doing things by the book and also against our union so I would like to know what my rights are.
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2023.06.08 06:53 The_Ghost_Of_Gaming Well, He's Trottin' Around
When Haikus exist And your father sucks with them Give yourself some skill
Basic Information
| | |
Name | John [Thomas] Trott | |
Godrent | Apollo | Just regular Apollo |
Sex | Male | |
Gender | Male | |
Sexuality | Bisexual | |
FC
John Family
Family Tree [All tree information is NOT common knowledge. As of now, June 6th 2023, John and Sophie do not know they are related or that John even has a mortal father.]
Powers
Domain
Power | Description | Downsides |
Light Manipulation | John can manipulate different forms of standard light and sunlight. | Creates heat in response. |
Unknown | | |
Unknown | | |
Minor
Power | Description | Downsides |
Legendary Sight | John can see better and farther than the average person. | NA |
Music Proficiency | John is more adaptable to learning instruments and has a natural ability to make music. | NA |
Archery Proficiency | John is naturally able to learn achery more easily. | NA |
Major
Power | Description | Downsides |
Divine Healing (Modmail) | John can use his energy to magically heal the hurt. | Takes a lot of food, energy, rest, and patience. |
Apollo-gies
John sat up to hear the bustling of the only few cabin members he had. It wasn't very loud, but it had once bothered him for some reason. Last time it had made him irritated, he nearly became a dictator over the cabin.
Restrictions on light magic were dumb. He nearly put them in place too. Most of the things he did to betray his cabinmates were dumb, irrational decisions he made because he had a headache.
He had scared a little girl who had just been claimed because he was upset at her for throwing a violin bow at him. It's possible it could've hurt him, but he would've deserved it for the way he was acting.
The demigod was now sitting up, all these thoughts came back to his stupid brain at the worst time. He felt like there was a need to apologize and there was. There was too much guilt, and John had scared people.
His gut wrenched before getting dressed and entering the main room. All Apollo cabin members were there, even the girl. It was the perfect chance, but he was afraid he might blow it.
A clearing of the throat broke the noise that everyone was making. They all looked at him with confusion. John then said,
"My dearest friends and compatriots, I have done you all wrong and hope to right it." John's transatlantic accent was now in full swing before fading quickly.
"My attitude was brash and rather rude a few months ago. I'm very sorry. Especially to you."
John quickly pointed at the girl who had thrown the violin bow at him months prior. The demigod quickly motioned for her to come to him.
"Look, I'm sorry I tried to scare you. I don't know where my mind was that day, but I want to make it right to you. What can I do to help make up for it?"
The girl was taken aback by John's attitude. He had acted horrible months before. Now he was trying to apologize and make up for it.
"You could help the Harpies with dishes," she replied.
Most of his cabinmates agreed with the girl's statement. Some shook their heads. Others verbally agreed by mumbling things like "yes," or, " sounds fair."
"Alright then."
Now
John had just finished helping the Harpies with the dishes. His hands were dirty despite having been wearing gloves, so he quickly washed them and left. John didn't know what to think of the Harpies.
The demigod waved to the Harpies and said goodbye. Only a few acknowledged his wave, and only a few of those responded. That was fair though. He would be interrupting their work.
Given that John was tired, he figured to take a power-nap. His bunk was nice and cozy as he tried to drift off, but he couldn't. No matter how hard John tried, he couldn't nap. Maybe it meant he wasn't tired after all.
He quickly left his cabin to sit by the lake. It was such a pretty lake filled with aquatic life. Right next to the lake sat a large rock. He loved to sit on the rock and relax, so he hurled himself onto the rock. There he sat, thinking.
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2023.06.08 06:52 madmag23 FIFA U20 World Cup Semi-Final
Friday 09 June 2023 (GMT +7)
Uruguay vs Israel
One of the first two games in the FIFA U20 World Cup semi-final will see Uruguay face the challenge of Israel this evening. Uruguay progressed to the semi-final by beating the USA 2-0 in the quarter-final courtesy of two goals scored by Anderson Duarte and an own goal by Joshua Wynder. That is Anderson Duarte’s second goal in the competition and he is Uruguay’s joint top-scorer in the competition alongside Matias Albado and Franco Gonzalez. Another player that runs the show for Uruguay in this tournament is Fabricio Diaz as he has notched 1 assist and averaging 4.2 key passes per game so far. It is also worth noting that Uruguay has scored 10 goals so far while conceding only 2 goals, keeping a clean sheet on four of the last five games in the competition. Meanwhile, Israel shocks the public by surprisingly winning the game 3-2 against one of the favorites to win the tournament, Brazil. It requires an extra-time to win the game but they nearly make it 4-2 if the penalty from Ahmad Ibrahim went in. Dor Turgeman’s second goal in the tournament sealed the victory for Ofir Haim’s side. Turgeman is Israel’s joint-top scorer in the tournament alongside Anan Khalili. Aside from his goal contribution, Dor Turgeman has also played a big contribution for Israel in the tournament as he has recorded 1 assist, 2 big chances created, and an average of 1.8 successful dribbles in the tournament. It is clear that Uruguay has to pay extra attention to him to try to keep him quiet in this game. It will be tight but I think Uruguay will go to the final by beating Israel in this game.
Prediction: 55 – 45
Italy vs South Korea
Italy progressed to the FIFA U20 World Cup semi-final by beating South American nation Colombia 3-1. In the semi-final, they will face the challenge of the underdog, South Korea who went to the semis by beating African side Nigeria 1-0. After impressively beating England 2-1 in the quarter-final, Italy showed that they are one of the favorites to win the tournament after producing a very solid performance in their 3-1 win over Colombia. Cesare Casadei, Tommaso Baldanzi, and Francesco Pio Esposito were all on the score sheet in that game. Cesare Casadei become a very important figure in this Italian U20 side as he is their current top scorer in the tournament with 6 goals and he has also contributed with 1 assist so far. All of those contributions are being made from his central midfield position and Italy U20’s manager Carmine Nunziata will be very pleased by his contribution in this tournament. On the other side, nobody expects South Korea to progress to the semi-final but they have proved themselves as a good team and will try to continue the fairy tale by beating Italy in this game. What is more impressive is that no team manage to beat them so far in the tournament even though they have faced strong teams like France, Ecuador, and Nigeria. Their goalkeeper Moon Hyun-Ho has been their hero so far as his performance in this tournament has been really good and he has produced some really important saves to keep them in the tournament so far. Their midfielder Seun Won Lee also played an important role for them so far in the tournament with 1 goal scored and 4 assists notched so far. South Korea will be a tough challenge for Italy here but I believe in the end Italy will still have enough qualities at their disposal to see off South Korea’s challenge in this game.
Prediction: 55 – 45
DISCLAIMER:
1. This prediction content comes from a third party and is for reference only. I am not responsible for any wins and losses generated by members using these tips.
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2023.06.08 06:52 MrsMacguire Question about "Ideal being" in Edith Stein.
Hi all. Apologies if this is not an appropriate post but I'm having some trouble with this topic and was wondering if anyone could point me in the right direction. I'm taking a Metaphysics class in college and it is focused on Edith Stein's work. We are supposed to write an essay about the differences between the essence of the 'ideal being' and the 'actual being' in her book "Finite and Eternal Being" and ONLY work with that book. But I'm having a hard time because she doesn't seem to mention the "ideal being" there. She did talk about it in Potency and Act but as I said I can only cite the one book. I asked my professor if there's another name for it there but he said that I just need to read it again. For context I'm not in an English speaking country but I would really appreciate if anyone could at least tell me if the ideal being has another name. I don't know if it's the "essential being" or what but I'm really stuck. I don't pretend y'all do the work for me but I need at least a small nod in the right direction because I am very confused and my professor doesn't want to answer amy questions about the project and I haven't been able to do anything. Thanks for any help. I am not a philosophy student (if you need more context let me know).
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2023.06.08 06:52 SweetAltruistic2301 Buckle Up. This one's a wild ride.
I (37/f) have been with my husband (41/m) since I was 24. I've always known something was off, but I didn't recognize it because I basically married an exact replica of my narcissistic father. My mom is codependent and through a ton of work I've put into myself over the past few years, I've learned that I too am codependent.
I have never ever felt like my husband and I have been on "level playing field" so to speak. Whatever he says goes, ALWAYS. It's been that way since day one. I'm not allowed to disagree with him, I'm not allowed to have any emotion except happy and "on" with him. He had a petty messed up childhood and I've always attributed his behavior to that. It's what i was used to my whole life, so I never objected, but mostly because I NEED things to be OK with him all the time, every time, otherwise I feel an extreme amount of anxiety. And I mean, EXTREME. About 2 years into our relationship, I did something that upset him and I couldn't deal with the fact that I messes things up and couldn't fix them. He came home that day to find me unresponsive. He called an ambulance and performed cpr. He still credits himself for saving my life, which maybe he did, but he holds it over my head all the time.
We've had a lot of things happen in our relationship that I've just had to shove down and act like they're normal to avoid the verbal abuse and backlash from me. After our 2 kids were born (now 6 and 3), I was recovering from c sections and also taking care of the new baby AND him because he still expected me to be at his beck and call. You guys! I knew something was off, but I did what he wanted because I didn't want to deal with his anger if I didn't. I did not know how to tell this man no. There was constant verbal abuse, emotional abuse, financial abuse and even a few instances of sexual abuse.
In December 2020 things had gotten so bad and I decided it was time to go. My youngest was not even one yet and still nursing. I packed the kids up and he tried to stop me. He called the police and claimed that I still had the same issues from years before when he had to save my life. Long story short, I left for about a week, but came back with my tail between my legs. Nothing changed. This is when I started therapy. I begged him and would continue to beg him for years to do couples therapy or start his own therapy journey, but he we ALWAYS against it.
Fast forward to last summer. He decides he wants a Ferrari and that the best way for him to get it would be to create a page on onlyfans. I did it. I was fairly successful but I worked my ass off, on top of being a mom to 2 toddlers, taking care of him AND working 4 jobs. I did not sleep much. I was constantly working. It never stopped. He was my biggest cheerleader because the money was good.
I interacted with my fans daily. It was very transactional with every single one of them, except one. He was sweet, funny and NORMAL. I am not proud of the feelings I started developing for this man, but I was smitten. He made me feel like a real goddamn woman and not the hired help that was there to serve and please. We had deep, meaningful conversations, which sounds ironic considering where we met. I know none of this is right or moral but I'm just laying out all the facts, people!
We'll do another quick fast forward to this spring. Between my weekly therapy sessions and my emotional affair, I am now completely checked out of my marriage but going through the same motions as to not stir up the anger. He notices something different about me and starts going through my phone while I'm asleep and checking all my phone records. He discovered I had phone consultations with multiple divorce attorneys and shit hits the fan.
I end up once again moving out, in with my sweet mom and get the courage to tell him I do not feel emotionally safe with him. That I can't be the actual person I am around him because I have to fit his perfect mold that he's build around me. He suddenly starts doing therapy. Reading (according to him 94 in today so far) books about marriage, relationships, communication, etc. He literally becomes the husband that I would've dreamed of having this whole time.
I work up the courage to tell him that I appreciate this efforts, but he's just trying to hold on to something that I've already let go of and that I would be lovingly divorcing him. That was the best nights sleep I've ever had. It was a huge weight lifted off my shoulders. Then the next day he showed up and told me that God talked to him and told him that we need to work things out because we're supposed to have another baby (something I've been asking for for year) and we need to do this and that and blah blah blah to make things better than ever because apparently God talked to him for 2 hours and told him all the things i wanted to hear. I was extremely frustrated because I FINALLY told him I wanted the divorce and was firm and here we were. I told him I'd agree to ONE therapy session with him.
After I said that, it's like the divorce words never came out of my mouth. He acts like everything is fine and dandy and my codependent self is oddly going along with it because in my mind, there's no yelling, no drama, so this is fine. But it's not fine. I'm not fine. I want it to be over. Do I tell him about the emotional affair? I'm so terrified about lighting that fuse, and I know he'll paint me in the worst light... or do I keep that to myself? I don't want to damage my kids in anyway at all, which is another part of the equation that he highly tries to manipulate.
If you have any advice, I would appreciate the heck out of you ❤️
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2023.06.08 06:52 shrekfanpage ADHD Treatment in the UK
Hey friends! I’m moving to England at the end of this month and I’ve been feeling really anxious from hearing that…
- A lot of doctors in the UK don’t really acknowledge ADHD, and especially not in women
- Even if a doctor does acknowledge my 14 years history of treatment for ADHD, they absolutely will not (can not?) prescribe adderall to patients
How true are those two anecdotes? How do you guys cope with it, if it is true? Do you have any advice?
Thank you so much for anything and everything my people living in the UK (or just more knowledgeable about ADHD treatment in the UK) can offer in the way of information or advice. I appreciate you.
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2023.06.08 06:51 RavenCravin How to decrease work stress
I work as a self checkout attendant and Im constantly conflicted between being our stores security whilst also attempting to provide friendly customer service all whilst doing 0_0 watching people scan. It's a lot..but we get a lot of thieves every day and some customers give you that entitled pov of-hey you can't accuse me of anything! when I just ask them if they may have missed something..
It really sucks. Its only nice when my sco partner and I click and can kinda read each other to delegate tasks well or catch people but sometimes with some coworkers or during certain times it feels like you're alone. Any perspectives on how I could stop feeling like a villain and feel more at ease whilst doing my job? Maybe some good phrases to use with customers so they're less likely to get offended, or anything. Thanks in advance :]
Forgot to add but Ive been getting ignored lately when greeting customers and its been demoralising.how can i not get in my head so much? I feel rejected 24/7 yay.
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2023.06.08 06:51 BusinessDuck1234 Crests from Pokemon Rejuvenation are added to the game: Part 2
I already covered the first 11 crests
here, but to just go over the basics again, Pokemon Rejuvenation is a fan game that adds items called crests, which are meant to make bad pokemon better. Also, I'm not an expert on competitive pokemon, so if i'm wrong about something, feel free to correct me in the comments
Delcatty Crest: If held by a Delcatty, this item adds 10% of every stat (with the exception of HP) from all unfainted Pokémon in the controlling trainer's party
Was going to talk about how trash this is, but fortunately i reread the page on the wiki. Incase you're dumb like me and didn't understand, this isn't 10% of delcatty's stats. It's 10% of the stats of the other pokemon in its party. This means if you have a bunch of good special attackers in your party, delcatty will now have pretty good special attack. Same with bulk, or speed, or attack, you get the idea. This makes delcatty very customizable, and obviously seems like one of the pokemon to rise up in tiering thanks to this crest boost. And since its power scales with the power of its teammates, it could rival stuff like pelipper and torkoal for the biggest rise in viability. I'm honestly not sure how this thing would be handled in the tiering sense, because in a tier with a lower power level, it becomes much weaker, so it could be struggling in ZU but thriving in OU for example. All things considered, one of the most substantial buffs given by a crest, and Arceus does this thing need it.
Druddigon Crest: If held by a Druddigon this item grants a 30% damage bonus to Dragon- and Fire-type moves. When the holder of this item is hit by a damaging Fire type move, its HP is restored by 1/4th of its maximum HP, and the move will have no effect on that Pokémon (if the holder already has full HP, the Fire type move will do nothing). This effect can be ignored with the Mold Breaker ability and its variants. If harsh sunlight is active, a Druddigon holding this item will restore 1/8th of its maximum HP at the end of each turn.
Might be a good partner for torkoal in trick room, but realistically, there are better pokemon that actually belong in OU that can fill that role. Definitely gonna be great on lower tier sun teams, since it can run tera steel for a good defensive typing and not have to worry about boosted sun moves.
Dusknoir Crest: If held by a Dusknoir this item increases the Pokémon's Attack stat by 20%. It also increases the power of moves with 60 BP or less used by 50%. (exactly like the Technician Ability).
Fine, I'll post the stupid calc. 252+ Atk Iron Fist Dusknoir Ice Punch vs. 252 HP / 252+ Def Landorus-Therian on a critical hit: 420-496 (109.9 - 129.8%) -- guaranteed OHKO. In all seriousness, technician shadow sneak is really nice to have. And a boost to attack never hurt anybody. Still far from good, but at least might be decent as a sort of lower tier breloom.
Empoleon Crest: If held by a Empoleon, this item grants Ice type STAB and doubles Speed in
Hail Snow
Slush rush and ice stab are pretty decent buffs to give an already decent pokemon. Shame it still does get outsped by many scarfers even under hail, but passable bulk means it can probably live a neutral hit and retaliate with blizzard, or hydro pump, or knock off to take away the speed advantage from scarf. Similar to Druddigon, might be good on lower tier weather teams
Fearow Crest: If held by a Fearow, this item causes the Sniper ability to always increase Fearow's damage by 50%, instead of only boosting critical hits. Additionally Fearow will always critically hit targets below 50% HP unless they are protected from Critical Hits by their ability (Battle Armor or Shell Armor) or the effect of Lucky Chant.
So this is just a choice band minus the restriction right? Also guaranteed crits below 50% mean that this thing can be a great lategame cleaner if it can outspeed. That's the biggest issue, however, since base 100 speed is basically the average, and atrocious bulk means that if it doesn't outspeed, it will die to most super effective or even powerful neutral hits. Maybe with something like tailwind for speed control, it would be a force to be reckoned with, but without it, Fearow struggles to be good even with the crest
Feraligatr Crest: When held by Feraligatr, this item causes it to have increased priority (+2 priority bracket) on attacking moves during its first turn after being send out. Additionally, it boosts the holder's biting moves (e.g. Bite, Crunch) by 50%.
First impression on your move of choice and free strong jaw
and keeping sheer force makes this thing an absolute monster. Almost forgot, it still has dragon dance to set up if it wants. Might just be bias from the fact it was on my team in game, but this thing seems like a monster. I ran max defense and attack on mine, and it was really good, and I didn't even give it dragon dance for setup. Seems like this would bump it up a tier, or at least make it tier king in whatever tier it's in.
Glaceon Crest: If held by a Glaceon, it will cause the user to take resisted (instead of super-effective) damage from Rock and Fighting-type attacks.
They buffed an ice type defensively by removing two of its many weaknesses. Not much to say here
Hypno Crest: If held by a Hypno this item increases the holder's Special Attack by 50% and the Accuracy of the user's moves by 50%.
105% ACCURATE FOCUS BLAST LETS GOOOO! Besides running focus miss as actual coverage, hypno boasts a 90% accurate hypnosis and an amazing boosting option in nasty plot, although it always had the latter. You could also technically use this to make stuff like zen headbutt on physical sets 100% accurate, but no real reason to run those with the free specs boost it gets
Infernape Crest: If held by an Infernape, Attack and Special Attack stats are swapped, respectively, with its Defense and Special Defense stats. Additionally the holder will recover 1/16 of its maximum HP at the end of each turn.
This crest seems to attempt to make infernape more bulky, and it works pretty well, in my opinion. Has a lot of great tools like encore, will-o-wisp, and slack off. Doubt it's gonna be good in OU, since there are some better options there, but it might be good in UU, or at least RU
Leafeon Crest: If held by a Leafeon, it will cause the user to take resisted (instead of super-effective) damage from Fire and Flying-type attacks.
Pretty much the same deal as with glaceon crest. One idea i had is that it might be good in sun teams, since it gets chlorophyll and now resists fire, but besides that nothing of note
Ledian Crest: If held by a Ledian, this item allows its holder to use punching moves (e.g. Power-Up Punch, Ice Punch, etc.) 4 times in a row. Secondary effects of these moves can only trigger on the first 2 uses, the effect also applies to Comet Punch so you can deliver from 8-20 punches.
Who would have known all it took to make ledian decent was to multiply its effective damage by 4x? Decent is the key word, because it's still nothing insane. With power up punch, it gets an effective swords dance boost along with some extra chip. This thing absolutely hates anything bulky with rocky hemet though, and really just bulky pokemon in general. If it manages to get some boosts, it might be able to KO them, but it's still really frail, so they might just finish it off first. But it should still find some niche in lower tiers
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2023.06.08 06:51 Dj8590 Couple of top-rated European brunette sluts Simony Diamond and Afrodite help two studs to de-stress from work
2023.06.08 06:51 dingdingding234 Question about two weeks’ notice
Basically I have to move into my new apartment in a new town by a certain date because I am starting an internship there. While the internship doesn’t technically start the week I move in, I will still have to pay rent that week and I don’t really want to pay rent when I’m not going to be there (since I’ll still be working at Chipotle). If I don’t officially give two weeks’ notice and give them like 9 days notice instead will I be rehirable? Also could I technically give them my two weeks’ and then just request unpaid time off at the end of the two weeks?
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2023.06.08 06:51 HeziG0D Is this TCG Hero Deck Viable
Hey everyone, I've came up with an updated Hero Deck that I'm working on based on the comments/suggestions that I received so far. The End Board that I'm aiming for is a combination of DPE, Dark Law, and Plasma. Can you please let me know what else I can add/remove to make it more consistent, or if possible, competitive?
Monsters (17 cards): - E-Hero Stratos x2
- E-Hero Shadow Mist x2
- E-Hero Liquid Soldier x1
- E-Hero Honest Neos x1
- Evil Hero Adusted Gold x1
- Vision Hero Faris x2
- Vision Hero Vyon x2
- Vision Hero Increase x1
- D-Hero Plasma x1
- D-Hero Denier x1
- D-Hero Dark Angel x1
- D-Hero Mali x2
Spell/Trap (17 cards): - A Hero Lives x2
- Fusion Destiny x2
- Polymerization x2
- Miracle Fusion x1
- Mask Change x3
- Dark Calling x1
- ROTA x1
- E-Emergency Call x2
- Harpie's Feather Duster x1
- Forbidden Chalice x2
Hand Traps (6 Cards): - Infinite Impermanence x3
- Ash Blossom x2
- Effect Veiler x1
Extra Deck (15 cards): - Masked Hero Dark Law x2
- Wake Up Your E-Hero x1
- Xtra Hero Cross Crusader x1
- Xtra Hero Wonder Driver x1
- E-Hero Sunrise x1
- D-Hero DPE x1
- Evil Hero Mali Bane x1
- Vision Hero Trinity x1
- Vision Hero Adoration x1
- D-Hero Dangerous x1
- E-Hero Great Tornado x1
- E-Hero Absolute Zero x1
- Masked Hero Acid x1
- Masked Hero Blast x1
Notes:
- A Hero Lives x2 - Running it at 3 copies might lead me to bricking later on the game if I draw the other copies and I have monsters on the field. So I think 2 copies is just right in case I run into Ash Blossom's effect.
- Forbidden Chalice x2 - I decided to include this card so I can at least extend the opponent's negated monster effect until the end of my turn. I'm thinking of replacing this with Forbidden Droplet instead but the cost of sending other cards to the GY might affect my combo. Although, of course this is situational, but still, comparing to forbidden chalice's effect, I'm currently not sold into using Forbidden Droplet. Or I'm just not seeing something here, feel free to enlighten me about this one.
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2023.06.08 06:51 aidanmaag1 Will my car be totaled
I have a 1999 Honda accord it’s not in the best cosmetic condition, and has about 200k miles. I was hit in a parking lot at work, leaving quarter panel, door, bumper dents and scrapes. Will this total it out considering it’s pretty old and has a lot of miles?
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2023.06.08 06:51 GearEqual The Whopper Song
"The Whopper Song may seem like just another advertising jingle, but for many people, it holds a special place in their hearts. It's not just a catchy tune that encourages us to buy a hamburger. "Whopper, Whopper" is a song that speaks to the heart and soul of anyone who has ever enjoyed a Whopper. It's a celebration of choice, customization, and the joy of having things our way. It's a reminder of the joys of childhood, of family road trips, of moments of pure happiness. I highly recommend this song to anyone who loves a good burger and a great tune.
When I first heard "Whopper, Whopper," I was not sure what to expect. But as the lyrics flowed through my ears, I felt that in my soul, this was a song that spoke to my deepest desires. The catchy tune and repetitive lyrics had me humming the tune long after the song had ended. The line "Junior, Double, Triple Whopper" reminded me of the thrill of having options, and the excitement of choosing the perfect meal. The songwriters perfectly captured the flame-grilled taste of a Whopper, with the addition of perfect toppers that add a touch of perfection to every bite. The chorus of "I rule this day" is powerful and empowering, reminding us to take control of our lives and seize the moment. It's a sentiment that I felt deeply, and it resonated with me on a personal level. The bridge of the song, with its reference to lettuce, mayo, pickle, and ketchup, had me reminiscing about the many times I've customized my Whopper to my liking. It's okay if I don't want that, because the beauty of the Whopper is that it can be made to suit any taste. The lyrics of "Whopper, Whopper" had me emotionally invested, and I cried at the part where they mentioned the Impossible or bacon Whopper. It was a pog moment that reminded me of the many times I've had to choose between two amazing options. "Whopper, Whopper" is a song that speaks to the heart and soul of anyone who has ever enjoyed a Whopper. It's a celebration of choice, customization, and the joy of having things our way. I highly recommend this song to anyone who loves a good burger and a great tune.
For me, the Whopper Song is a symbol of my relationship with my dad. When I was growing up, my family would often take road trips across the country, and we would always stop at Burger King for lunch. I can still remember sitting in the back seat of the car, singing along to the Whopper Song with my dad as we drove down the highway.
As I got older, those family road trips became fewer and farther between, but the Whopper Song remained a constant in my life. Whenever I would pass a Burger King, I would inevitably find myself humming the tune under my breath.
But it wasn't until I moved away from home for college that I truly realized just how much the Whopper Song meant to me. I was walking through the streets of a new city, feeling lonely and homesick, when I heard the familiar strains of the jingle coming from a nearby Burger King. It was like a ray of sunshine on a cloudy day, a little piece of home that brought a smile to my face and warmed my heart.
To this day, whenever I hear the Whopper Song, I am transported back to those happy memories of childhood, of family, of love. It's not just a silly advertising jingle - it's a part of who I am, a touchstone that connects me to my past and my family.
In a world that often feels chaotic and uncertain, the Whopper Song is a reminder of simpler times and the people we hold dear. It's a reminder to cherish the moments of joy and connection that we find in life, no matter how small or seemingly insignificant they may be. So here's to the Whopper Song - may it continue to bring us all a little bit of happiness and nostalgia for years to come."
-thatoneguy, Star Raider
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2023.06.08 06:51 Time-District-4148 Ethernet Issues.
Long time Lurker First time poster. :c
I've been having some issues with ethernet speeds over the last couple days. Frontier Gig Service. Pulling anywhere between 80~150 down on Cat6 Was pulling 950+ Before the problems started. The thing that's throwing me off though is the upload speeds are consistent 900+. =/
ONT And Router were replaced, eero was installed with the old router being used as a switch but the problem persists.
Link speeds~~~
ONT show 1Gb/1Gb
ONT to eero 1Gb/1Gb
eero to switch 1Gb/1Gb
-Full Duplex (1Gb) -IPv6 off/on didn't make a difference. -I've tried different DNS none of it was making a difference aside not being able to load some pages later in testing.
Cables were checked, Tried Bypassing the Router entirely and connecting directly to ONT, problem persisted. used new cables and ISP provided cables know working.
Tried switching the ethernet cables between switch>PC over to eeros>switch speeds were fine between them but still slow to PC.
there's two computers that are connected Via Ethernet and both are having the same issue AFAICT.
Called Frontier and had them run speed tests on their end with the cables switched around and they were showing full speed to ONT and ONT to Both eeros and Switch. Tried the built in Speed test on eeros app and it also shows 950+ down/up, But the download to PC is still really slow.
Both where working fine. 950 up/down Up until a couple days ago.
For reference:
eero Pro 6 V6.15.1-410
NVG468MQ Version: 9.3.0h7d91
Network Adaptor (PC): Intel(R) Ethernet Controller (3) 1225-V (v.2.1.3.3)
Another Thing I JUST noticed as I was typing this up. M-lab speed test off of google search page when you Just google "Speed test" Pull scores of 600+Up and 900+Down BUT Every other speed test Pulls Way lower.
Fast speed test: 150down /900+Up
Spectrum: 75.5 Down /900+Up
Google Fiber Test: 44 Down /900+Up
Speak Easy: 118 Down /900+Up
ookla : 220 Down /900+Up
I've tried looking around on here for solutions, But I haven't found one yet. I feel like I've tried what I can think of and am Genuinely stumped.
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2023.06.08 06:51 Ok_Adhesiveness1578 MIL Issues causing rift between Wife and I. Newborn Twins, 4 weeks old.
So wife had C-Section, and LO are now entering their 4th week. MIL has been staying with us since LO came home. It’s starting to get frustrating on how controlling she is.
Now let me pause and say, how much I appreciate my MIL with how much she has helped us, it’s been a blessing. I love her and have a great relationship.
I’ve already returned back to work but am lucky enough to work from home. So when working I help out with the little things, prep bottles, make breakfast, feed dog, cleaning up etc. Once I get off work I pick up the slack tell wife to get some rest while MIL and I watch the LO. At that point I feed, I clean, I put them to sleep. I’ll do that until 1-2 am until I wake up wife so she can rest.
So since the beginning my MIL has had a say in everything my wife does, from how to feed to which way to whipe there bum. My wife isn’t even able to go outside for a walk. My wife hasn’t spoken up as she is afraid that she will hurt her feelings.
There is moments where I’m holding the baby and MIL will snatch the baby away because he is crying while feeding. I’m the father let me figure it out. (This is my rant now). God forbid I hold the baby without having a blanket over my hands so baby can sit on. She just starts saying how we aren’t supposed to do this or that and this causes that. We can’t even bathe the LO she has to do it cuz she don’t trust us.
At the beginning I was all about it. My ears were wide open but at a certain point we can figure it out. Now I’m not the type to talk back to my elders, but I am getting an attitude now.
I’ve told my wife you need to draw the line in the sand with your mom it’s causing to many issues and now it’s affecting my wife and I. But she is unwilling to talk to my MIL bc of fear she will hurt her feelings.
I don’t know what to do anymore…
Edit: I guess I just feel that I’m not getting the chance to be the father I wanted to be… no issues with my MIL but something needs to be addressed.
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2023.06.08 06:51 reinsilverio26 oo nga, priorities kasi ng mga kurap ih 🤦🏻♂️
2023.06.08 06:51 VirgoEsti First appointment coming up what should I start with?
So I’m having a few symptoms the most important is I’m always tired I have to nap at least once a day like an hour or two. I can still sleep okay at night usually 8 hours. I’m always hungry I have like an endless appetite and I never feel full. So I chalked those up to maybe my anxiety meds but my psychiatrist swears it’s not. Then I thought pcos and saw an endocrinologist who confirmed it because I also have jawline acne toobut I’m still not sure. Also I’m having weird possible yeast infection symptoms I got tested and the doctor said both a yeast infection and a bacterial vaginosis but after I got meds for it it comes back randomly. The symptoms I get from it mainly is just super itchy down there and my anal area is itchy too but it’s 95% only at night which is weird! (I already checked and no it’s not pinworms and I’ve never been sexually active) and lastly since about 2 years now my tongue has been feeling burnt on the tip to where it feels as if I drank or ate something too hot. And if I eat spicy food even mildly spicy or use mouthwash the tip of my tongue always burns way more than the rest of my mouth. And I can feel its always slightly burning when I don’t eat or drink anything it never completely goes away. I thought burning mouth syndrome but not sure on that either.
So with those being said what tests or things should I make sure to ask about at my appointment? The Dutch test? Anything else specific or just tell the doctor my symptoms mainly?
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