How much do charter pilots make

weve known eachother for about a month and met in the first class of the semester. we worked togethor everyday and she was flirting quite often. i was going to ask her out at the end of the class as to not make it awkward. what i didnt know was that she was leaving on externship immedietly after the class ended.
i texter her a few days later telling her my feelings and she said she felt the same way however our texts have been very dry. i dont really know how i should proceed with this as im kinda knew to dating and all that stuff. shes a wonderful person and i really dont want to let this chance pass by me. what do yall recomend i do?
i dont think theres much else to it but ima write this becausd the bot keeps saying my post aint detailed enough

I see some united fans happy to to have him, especially on the reddevils subreddit, but I see other united fans that absolutely hate the idea of mount going to united, saying that he doesn't solve any issues the united squad currently has and that he plays best off the shoulder of the striker, not exactly the area that united desperately needs fixing right now.
I haven't been paying attention to much but on the Chelsea sub, I see a lot of their fans happy to have him go to united, so it makes me wonder, do they think mount wouldn't even improve united all that much?

Need some expert advice here! I am a US Citizen. I recently got married abroad. I was checking how can i bring my spouse here at the earliest. Here are the 2 options i am seeing and the related facts. 1. I apply with i-130 for an immigrant visa - Right now the USCIS case processing time shows 32.5 months (source) if i choose the All field offices option and for individual field offices it shows around 13 months on average. Which means (i guess) that USCIS approves the application after 13 months and then forwards it to State department where i fill up ds-260 and wait for an interview date.

1. We try for a visiting visa (B1/B2) - Right now the waiting time for the interview shows 297 days at their website for our country which is 297 days (source) equivalent to around 10 months. But I have a source who claims to manage an earlier interview date than 10 months which makes it look a much better option to me.

We are 7 weeks pregnant now, we badly want to be together as much as possible and as you can feel it is hard for someone to manage leave from job, then paying bills while visiting abroad. Please help us considering the above facts and let us know our best option.

I don’t know what my next step should be. I’ve had friend since about second grade we are both going into our senior year. I just recently found out that she had two secret phones from her parents and only would contact me through her school email to ask me to text her mom. She has been my friend through the most worst couple of years of my life we became friends when we were both eight my little brother was six. I mention my little brothers age because we had just moved to the town. I’m in now and hadn’t even been there for two months. We had started moving in around December 4 and his accident happened between January 13 and January 14. I say between those times because it was night time and I don’t remember the exact time that the accident happened but I do know he was in the hospital January 13 some point at night. The story of what had happened was he was in what was gonna be the office and is now one of the bedrooms and there was bookshelf in the middle of the room bc we had just moved it into that room and had yet to put it against the wall. Well him and another family friend were climbing on it and when it fell down he was hit by a heavy box TV that was on top of it, and the bookshelf itself. He is now turning 16 this year he has a traumatic brain injury. I mention his story, because that is the root of my friendship with her. It was a new town. We had met once in school. She had seen me after the ambulance had came to my house, and our friendship began because, I want to say God put it on her heart because I needed that friend that I could lean on and she became that one. We have been friends for most 10 years now but lately she has been choosing bad friends ignoring me. Her family wants me to still be friends with her. They want me to be around more often but I’m almost 18 and I’m working a lot. I don’t want to let go of her or her family because they have been there for me many times. They have been there for me for my little brothers accident for my grandma Kay’s death off of my dogs. Death and my grandpa leaving us once again. And I’ve tried being there for her, but she doesn’t open up very often to anybody. She’s been hanging out with friends that vapes, she vapes I just found that one out. I don’t want to let go of her but I don’t think there is a friendship there anymore. I wish there was I don’t wanna stop being friends with her. I don’t wanna stop talking with her family, but her family thinks that I only hang out or around him because I’m friends with her and I don’t want to drop being friends with her and then still at her house and make her feel weird and uncomfortable by me being there but her siblings have became like my own don’t get me wrong I have siblings, but her siblings are two extra siblings of mine. And before anybody says well, try rekindling that relationship I’ve been trying to for years. I feel like our friendship has been dying since seventh grade and I’ve been holding onto every last string. I’ve been trying to pull more back down. There’s so much I find out about her through her mom because she just doesn’t talk to me anymore is so much I find out from other people telling me. I feel like I should let go of the relationship but I really don’t want to.

Hi I’m new to this and having a rough time please forgive grammar etc just trying to get it off my chest looking for advice or anything really
So background Me 21M Her 20F Ex 18M my 1.5 years parter Who was my first everything (Kiss, sex ,proper girlfriend ) etc (Waited till I found the right one or so I thought) Have spent multiple times together in person Everything has always been ok
she threw the idea of a break but I thought we worked threw it she also gave me 365 reasons she loved me then was 1 day for a year so everything was good So I fly home after thinking we are fine still in love she messages me for the first night then nothing Then I’m blocked Then the next day I see she’s talking to her ex so confused as why she was he was very manipulative and abused her financially and almost physically when they met who also was in a ldr with her before me And then she starts posting You don’t know how much you miss someone till you are apart for awhile And you’re my everything with a photo of her And I was confused because I still wasn’t sure what was happening Also had mutual friends confirm it was the ex So our mutual friend got into contact for me And she basically replied with I didn’t know how unattached I was till we had a break (1 day) And now she’s posting his hand and hearts And she said how he’s grown up and how he’s mature so I looked at his instagram and he’s posted a photo with him and a blue bandanna and his bio is e.a.s.t 💙 and stuff like that I believe he’s manipulating already kicking mutual friends out of there chats Making it so she can’t talk to me He’s also sending her responses to the messages I sent her for the only time I did get to text because she doesn’t type the way the responses were sent She claims it’s not the ex but the proof I have screams otherwise

1. Messages on Insta gram photo dump Saying let’s smash x and response (On the photos where I took her out and was physically with her )
   
2. A photo of her laying on a bed in a game saying for ex
   
3. 2 separate people confirmed who she was talking to
   
4. Her saying she’s catching up with him as a friend but they only say hello and bye
   

I brought her flowers everytime I have seen her and more then once most of the time We did date nights up till the day before I left We slept together
She has confirmed I’m the first partner to do anything for her romantic and not just want her body
I gave her my everything I did things that made me uncomfortable to better us I stopped talking to my friends that she didn’t like
She was bullied by people who I made stop and never let her know why it stopped Even she suspected me but I told her I wasn’t sure why
I spent months working with her building her up constantly reassured her she’s loved and is beautiful and I was here
She wasn’t eating and had pretty bad body views because of ex
I made sure she ate everyday I brought her food when she had none I gave her my everything
And for her to turn around and move on after a day doesn’t seem fair and going back to him on top of that
She wasn’t the most loving girlfriend Tho She would tell me to cry and think it was funny to make me cry after we got into disagreements (I’m not a person who cry’s) She would physically hit me if I annoyed her And lots more Yesterday she took money out of my card because she had saved the information left me with 3$
I said to my friend before I knew she moved on and wasn’t sure what happen that I could drive up that night or fly the next day and it was only to talk to her and work this out nothing more nothing less (my words were if I don’t do everything in my power to save this is it really love ) He told her Then the messages I received

1. Well, you said you were going to show up to my house, now I’m really uncomfortable around you
   
2. You said you were going to show up to my house, now I’m scared. Can you blame me?
   
3. Well you really should’ve, because now I’m scared off you
   
4. I don’t if I can trust you, being alone with me. How do I know you won’t do something I don’t want
   

And that made me feel like a monster I have never done anything that would hurt her never threaten to hit her or anything And this is why I believe that it wasn’t her that wrote them because I was in bed with her days prior she kissed me she cuddle me laughed did everything like normal Plus she doesn’t use gramma (I admitted I shouldn’t of said I would just show up but I was losing my mind and wanted to fix it and my thought process was if we could just talk ) I said sorry for it And the fights that she start I always said sorry and took blame
I tried so hard to build her up making sure she was a better person growing. actually loving her and caring It took months to break down all the walls And the ex constantly made accounts to abuse us and tell us he was getting her back and how I’m nothing and other hate and drama I tried to keep us out of She promised me she wouldn’t ever put herself into a situation like that again
sure I was perfect but I gave everything I could. I tried to be perfect for her and even after all this I love her and want her back It’s only been 5 days today but I can see how he’s already manipulating her
And I’m worried about her so much Any attempt I made to talk failed There is a hole in my heart And all I want is to know shes going to be ok It hurts she left me and I told her in our relationship if you move on don’t go backwards and not to the ones who hurt her But I can’t sleep eat or function everything we did everything together like cook clean watch tv
It’s really broken me I haven’t cried this much ever And if there was anything I can do to help her I would Even the money she took if she just asked I would of brought her food or whatever she needed
Sure I could be toxic but i never tried to be and we worked together to fix it
I always made the effort to push like really push communication and we got really good at it till the end i guess when she didn’t talk to me
I just want to make sure she’s ok and that what’s hurting all the work for her to move back She had so much planned gym working on herself and now she’s on PlayStation for hours with him And it hurts that it’s him but hurts she’s throw all the progress away She’s also the reason I started being less depressed felt comfortable just being me And not wanting to hide away I improved as a person because of her
I wish I had the chance to fix this and Have the life we always talked about
Ps I know that probably no one will read this and I know it’s probably not the right group but I really need to get it out
Definitely forgot things and probably typos etc feel free to ask me anything I’m honestly a open book

I love going to a good club and hearing the best song on for the vibe and being the right amount of drunk, but these days, I’m more inclined to chill, be alone, would rather not talk to everyone. I don’t go on social media that much anymore. I mean - I’ve even started working out consistently, being still to realize my natural state of tendencies like if I do x thing then I will feel x way five hours later. Like I NEVER paid attention to realize this kind of stuff. And I have friends who travel, party, and just move around the same as me but I feel like I was just so floaty that I never paid attention to like triggers to how things make me feel. Anyone relate to going thru a realization period of being more still in learning more by just sitting with yourself ya know??

I used to work as a zookeeper at the Milwaukee Zoo. There wasn't much to it. Just your standard zoo with a gift shop and areas to visit certain animals. I certainly was a fan of the zoo as a child, having visited the zoo for birthdays or field trips. I always said I wanted to be a vet of some sort but guess zookeeper was the closest I could get. Started working at the place around age 20. Fresh out of high school and trying to save money for my autistic nephew, this job didn't offer much. Running the train when workers couldn't, making sure the animals were fed and taken care of, you get the gist. I know, I know. I said I was a zookeeper but work is right around these parts so I have to pitch in where I can.
When I first started at the Milwaukee Zoo, I felt like I was living my dreams of helping animals. But that soon turned out to not be the case. After being there for less than a year, strange occurrences started to happen. It would be minor things such as lights going out, animals being sick, etc. Nothing major. The big incident happened right when two rookies were hired to see where they would fit in at the zoo. They were skinny and teen like. One was more hairer than the other but other than that, they seemed normal. Or so I would think. The weather was a bit hot and I was sweating while cleaning the elephant enclosure. I know, not the greatest job but someone's gotta do it. The manger of the zoo came up to me as I was closing the metal door to the cage.
"You Emily Tanner?"
"Yes. What's up?"
"I've got these two rookie here and I was wondering if you have time to show them around the base, you know, kinda get them used to the place and see where they fit in."
"Um, sure." I stammered, reaching out to shake the two young mens' hands. The gesture was ignored. Thinking to myself, I wondered what was wrong with them. Did they not understand basic social cues? Were they autistic like my nephew? Thoughts started racing through my head until one of the young men spoke.
"You ever notice the smell of animal waste, how it brings you joy?"
I couldn't speak in that moment. Surely this guy was kidding around, right? Nope. His face was stone cold. He was serious.
"Maybe." I managed to get out. This guy was definitely going be the last one to work with, I thought to myself. Instead, I gave a plastered smile and continued on with the conversation.
"These two shouldn't give you a hard time." the manger said before walking away. I nodded in agreement but then he turned back around.
"Oh, and I posted some rules on your locker door. Be sure to read them carefully. You wouldn't want to know what could happen to you if you don't."
"Is this man for real??" I thought again, my breathing quickening. I was beyond confused. "What is happening??"
But I couldn't worry about that. I had these two rookies to look after. Once I ensured the door to the elephant enclosure was secure, I lead the two men to the gorilla exhibit. It was a bit of a walk since the zoo is literally a maze where if you wanted to get to one area of interest, you had to pass several others before reaching your destination. Sure, you might be wondering if I should have the zoo's layout memorized by now, but you have to think. I don't go to the zoo everyday. Even when I go home, the zoo isn't the first thing on my mind. As I was walking, showing the men the different animals and how they behaved and such, I caught a chill down my spine every time I took a glance behind me to ensure they were following me. I tried to ignore it but the feeling was so overwhelming, I had to say or do something to take my mind off the dreaded feeling.
"So, what brings you two to the zoo and why do you want to work here?" I asked them.
Nothing.
They didn't answer. They just stared. Their cold, black eyes stared right into my soul. I quickly turned away and continues down the hot sticky tar path towards the bird enclosure. Luckily for me, it was nearing my lunch break. I could probably feed some of the birds there and then leave these two to their own devices.
I hurried my pace so that time could move faster and I could get as far away from these guys as possible. Hastily, I opened the door to the enclosure and lead them inside. Naturally the birds flew and here and there, their squawks and screeches following them as they flew about.
"You wanna be careful with the birds. Sometimes they can be mean." I tried to crack a joke but these guys weren't having it. So I naturally shut my mouth and buried any jokes I had deep within. They just stared at me, their soulless eyes not leaving mine. Bleh! Where the manger pick these guys up from, the graveyard? Even mummies and buried corpses could crack a ghost smile every once in a while. Carrying on with showing them how to care for the birds, I checked my watch and quite literally ran out of the building like it was on fire. I had to know those rules and why on EARTH these deadpan guys were hired. Surely the manger wanted to hire them as a joke because no one could be that cold and unfeeling like these two creeps.
Racing to the lockecommon room, I checked my locker door and surely, there was a list of rules. Five of them to be exact.
Rule One. Do not allow new hires to see the animals. This is crucial. If you've broken this rule, it's already too late.
Rule Two. Make sure the new hires are not left alone with the animals.
Rule Three. Do not allow the new hires to come in contact with the people. This rule is to never be broken.
Rule Four. Ensure all enclosures are locked and secure.
Rule Five. If the new hires are ever left alone, run as far away from this place as you can. Don't look back.
Grabbing the note and slumping into a nearby nearly broken garden chair, I heaved a sigh. I guess I've broken most of these rules because I left these guys alone and I left them in the bird enclosure on top of that. These "rules" didn't make sense. Why didn't the manger warn me of these supposed rules before introducing me to these guys?? Sighing once more, I exited the room and went back into the blinding light outside. I hurried back to the bird enclosure to find the new hires gone. My heart sank. I had to find them and fast.
Since I didn't know where to look, I went to the manager's office and found him on the phone. He sounded annoyed.
"Yeah, yeah. I got them all set. The girl is to be in charge of them until I figure out something else."
His word hit me. Surely he wasn't talking about me, right? My thoughts swirled again and I nearly gagged. Holding myself together, I knocked on the open door. The manger looked up me, plastering the fakest smile ever.
"What brings you here?" he asked.
"Um, I saw the note on my locker door and I think... I think I might have broken a few rules already."
The manger quickly stood up and hurried to close the door shut. Looking out the blinds that faced the opening entrance to the zoo and gift shop, he turned to me, his face serious.
"Did you lose them?"
"Huh?"
"Did. You. Lose. Them?"
His jaw clenched and his face was covered in cold sweat.
"Yes." I finally admitted. The manger signed, hanging his head.
"We have a problem."
His words were cutthroat, no funny business hidden under his once funny demeanor.
"What...problem?" I questioned, concerned.
"Those new hires aren't... exactly what you would call human. They are entities of sorts."
Now my head was officially fried. Entities? I thought. What kind of twisty rollercoaster works was I living in?? The manger approached me.
"If we don't find them by midnight, we're toast." he said, his voice a whispery hiss. I stared at him, shocked.
"Well, what do you plan on doing? I-I didn't ask to be part of this!"
"Look, I didn't have a choice but to choose you. If I didn't..." he faded off. He then looked at me again, his features a mixture of hurt and panic.
"If I didn't choose you, I would be taken away." he sighed, the words a heavy burden to say.
My voice was no more. Still confused, I open my mouth to speak.
"What do we do now?"
"We wait."
End of Part One.

So I started a new position about a week ago, which coming with the territory means training and mistakes are going to be made as I am learning the ropes right?
Well backstory, I have been in the same field for 5 years (hospital nursing), I decide I need more work than my previous position was able to give. Originally 32 hrs a pay period was more than enough to live on, but now not so much so I decided to hunt for atleast 40hrs a pay period. So I find this job and apply and accept the role.
HUGE MISTAKE. I am not even 3 days there, and they throw me to the wolves, alone completely with 40 tasks I have never encountered before in my previous nursing role. I am asking for help, only to be scoffed at and mocked like I am the idiot of the pack. The other nurses speaking in hushed tones about "the new nurse is kind of stupid", writting messages about me in the hospital chatroom (think discord, but for hospital staff to IM eachother). While you may think, "Alex how do you know they are talking about you?" let me tell you the lovellyyy event that occured at lunch my first week.
I was eating lunch outside because the weather is nice, no rain or bad weather in sight, which seems fine right? Wrong. I come in and all the sudden the nurses around me are screaming and making a big deal that I had 2 small blades of grass in my hair as I was laying in the grassy court yard trying to relax my mind a bit. This explodes because 1 nurse then reports me to HR and management and I get written up for "not complying to company standard dress code". Instead of the nurses simply coming to me and being civil saying "hey, you have some grass in your hair, may want to fix it" they report me and have me FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER IN MY 5 YEARS AS A NURSE, written up.. I returned to my desk to see all my "coworkers"smirking and asking "what happened" as if playing dumb to not knowing EXACTLY what it was.
I just dont know what to do or where to turn. I regret leaving my previous role every day I return to this godforsaken new position. I have no outlet, as clearly the HR department is only for the people that have been there the longest. I could not even explain my case before that lovely pink notice was flaunted in my face. Whats worse is the company has a 6 month minimum position policy, where I am forced to work this role for 6 months before i am allowed to begin looking for other employment.
I just dont know what to do. In all my years nursing, I have never felt more alone, lost, and hurt. In a mere 3 weeks I started in this position, I have come home crying because the incessant bullying and belittling remarks I receive every shift. Asking for help on new tasks I am not familiar with I receive eye rolls and scoffs of attitude, many times followed by "how long have you worked here? you dont know this? -_-" I just want to scream..clearly I dont know or i would not be asking.
Its come to the low point that my alarm goes off and I have to tell myself not to cry. I just do not think time is going to make this position easy..the people and honestly the over all aura in the building feels like a toxic miasma.

i’m 15m, pre-everything and kind of conventionally unattractive. my face isn’t too feminine but it’s not symmetrical, i have a flat nose, weak chin, weak jawline, small eyes, low cheekbones, and noticeable fat on my face and chin. im kind of babyfaced and my face isn’t masculine at all. i’m 5’5 and thankfully my tits and curves aren’t that noticeable but i’m insecure about my height and shoulders, and just being physically smaller than most cis men.
typically i don’t mind that i look this way, but i’m really eager to engage in hookup culture when i’m a few years older. however the thought that being conventionally unattractive might prevent people from wanting to hook up with me makes me miserable. as a trans guy, i also have to worry about things like peoples genital preference and whether or not they are transphobic. i feel like i’ll never get the kind of college experience that i want.
so, average and below average looking trans guys, how do you guys do it? is there any hope for me?

At 47, I still get crippling anxiety and depression around my family. My parents and sister do not speak to me when I don’t do what they want, like letting them take my daughter on vacation for the entire summer. I’ve built my life around my family and now that I’m holding to my boundaries, I’m finding myself very alone. I’m a single parent, work full time, and it’s difficult to find the energy/motivation to make friends at this age, especially while suffering from depression for most of my life. I wish my life hadn’t revolved around my family for as much as it did. What’s worse is I think they get some weird pleasure out of knowing that they make me suffer. I’m only trying to do what’s best for me, but I wish they didn’t send me into a downward spiral. What do you do when your support system is also your biggest trigger?
Just feeling pretty low tonight.

hi everyone, i have noticed a few issues with verbal communication over the years that i think might make it hard to be around me? friend made an offhanded comment about how these actually seem like autism (i do have an official ADHD diagnosis).
some important context i have a lot of wonderful friends, and a pretty full social life; i've also been struggling with some serious health things right now, which might sort of make #4 a little more intense. i also am extremely empathetic and perceptive, so i truly think these mostly apply to conversations.
basically, i'm wondering if any of y'all have dealt with any of these things, and if so, how you've worked on them. also, if there's any thoughts on these patterns as an indicator of any larger issues
​

1. I have a hard time with interrupting people in conversations
2. I feel like in every context I need verbal communication to be direct, and I’m not great at reading between the lines or getting the implications.
3. I often feel like I have to bring the conversation back to myself. It's not that I'm not listening or engaging with the person, but the way I feel like I can relate to the other person is through some anecdote in my own life
4. Bad with eye contact
5. I get very obsessive/focused on things and sometimes can only talk about those (these are usually things going on in my own life, and distinct from the hyperfixations I sometimes have)

"LGBTQ people need rights" they already have rights. They probably have more rights than us. The only reason people disrespect you is for what you do and how you do it. We are not hating you because you are LGBTQ we hate you because of the things you do. I do not hate most people who are LGBTQ but when they don't listen to us is the problem. I'm able to show respect to a LGBTQ person and everyone else should too because their only mad because of the disrespect they receive. And we want them to notice the things they are doing to earn respect are not ok. Violent protests, harassment of kids false propaganda etc. Because the LGBTQ community did these things they became more hated and disrespected and violent protests harassment and false propaganda are make attacking them making a civil war. In conclusion, stop propaganda, stop all protests and give the LGBTQ community the respect you would give a normal person.

Alright some backstory, I'm a medic student who initially went to one of those premo medic schools here in the US. Long story short, several night spent crying later, I got booted from the program 5 days before finals for some bullshit I'm not getting into here. Now here I am, restarting from square one (academy classes don't have college credit) at a local comunity college with 500+ hours worked as a medic under my belt.
Fast forward to now, as I sit here and review my AP2 stuff from my instructor who I'm sure has never worked a day in the medical field and I see THIS SHIT in his EKG review:
"For example, this lecture on ECG now has much more value, even in this class because you can understand how to tell Grandpa to use the Kardia attached to his phoine to look for conditions that might indicate a developing heart problem."
Now correct me if I'm wrong, seen a STEMI once or twice in my baby medic time, but Kardia is a 1lead device that isn't diagnostic am I right? It can literally detect afib and that's pretty much it. Granted I'm sure some of you guys might be able to glean something out of a single lead that's worth investigating but the people in this class don't even have their CNA, EMT-B or anything that make them medically knowledgable. Not that either of those certs make them qualified to interpret a 12-lead
Really all I wanna know is if I'm right to be super sus of this guy since this is the second time I've seen him pedal this concept, and if I should be worried about this dangerous ass misinformation?

I love my mom. But something is so wrong with our relationship. I always feel like I have to bottle up my feelings around her, I don’t feel like my actual self with her. Disappointing her is the worst feeling in the world. I can’t argue with her because she always wins. I know this is a problem but at the same time I feel like I’m making this all up or I’m exaggerating. I know my sibling straight up despises our mom, they leave the house so much and I stay home with her so much I feel like an only child. My family is just really depressing. We rarely eat dinner together (and when we do it’s usually stressful), I’ve never talked to my dad about my feelings, I’m the one who defends him when my mom accuses him of not caring about us, this house is just sad. I feel sad here.
But if I told my mom any of this she’d make me feel like I’m making all of this up. She’s always in the right.

It took me over 30 years to fully grasp my mother and her NBPD. It’s taken even longer to realize my hero father has truly been complicit and enabling of her abuse.
My Nsister were very close. Best friends. She had it under control for the most part, and I never minced words with her, so she usually didn’t engage in that behavior with me. I became unexpectedly pregnant (real late bloomer) and decided it was best for me to be closer to her (she had just moved cross-country). My partner and I decided that it would be best raising LO there, and she would have her aunt/uncle cousins very much engrained in her life. We were to stay there, and help her transition into her new career by watching the kids. We paid rent, and bills. This was meant to be until we found our own place, but after we got there, housing started to skyrocket, and no matter how hard we worked, we knew it just probably wasn’t going to be feasible with a newborn to afford anything there. My sister later begged us to stay (she had 24/7 child care, and this now is obvious to me as the reason why).
Welp, after about four months, my sister had some sort of internal crisis, and immediately pushed her husband of seven years out of the house. I believe she realized I could take care of everything she needed when it came to the kids, and she was the primary breadwinner, so she found no use for him anymore. After he moved out, she went on heavy drinking benders. Acting like a freshly 21 year old college student, leaving her kids with me to go out and drink all night. She used to be the best mother. So attentive, caring, and present. I watched her completely deteriorate from what she once was. She started dating a terrible person- obnoxious, alcoholic, unintelligent and rude and everything went south. She never had her kids anymore, my partner and I did. I went from being pregnant to essentially having three children at once. She refused to bathe them, help with homework, grocery shop, anything needed. Once the guilt set in for her, she would pick them up, take them on a shopping spree, convince herself that was enough and restart the cycle. She became so nasty, mean, and a horrendous liar. I suffered from horrendous PPA, and immediately sought help. She was nowhere to be found. This caused so much turmoil mainly due to the neglect to her children that I knew we needed to plan our escape. Whenever I’d discuss the possibility of moving near his family, she begged and pleaded, because what was she going to do? Who was going to help her?
My NBPD mother had me fooled for a while. She for the first time agreed with me, and said I needed to get out. My e-dad guilted me for months and months, with what would become of my nieces if I left? How could I abandon them?
Eventually the situation got so toxic, that we secretly finalized plans, and within two weeks of move date- I let her know what was happening. Wrong move. She tried to dismantle, and try to get me to engage in a war so many times. I bit my tongue and reminded myself it was almost over.
The night we packed, she set up cameras around the house, and left to drink with her boyfriend. At one point my partner and I got super frustrated with each other, and we started yelling. We were exhausted, and trying to pack as fast as we could because all signs were pointing to one last explosion. The baby was teething, and I think we just lost it with each other. My sister was baby sitting the cameras, and took recordings and sent them to my NBPD mom and e-dad. All of them started blowing up my phone asking if I needed them to come save me frkm my abusive partner. They said they heard him yelling, and that they were going to make him suffer for it. I was like wtf? 1. It was completely out of frustration and juvenile. 2. It wasn’t even slightly aggressive 3.It was so minor I didn’t even know what they were referencing. (They heard him tell me to “shut the f up”.)
Both my sister and mother were so offended that I turned down their “protection” from him, and told them that nothing was going on. My mom started blowing up his phone, his brothers phone- anyone she could yell at. She got in the car and started driving 10 hours to my sisters. I knew they were trying to get a reaction out of me, but I kept cool and my eye on the prize.
We got out, stayed in a hotel that night, and decided he was going to fly with our eleven month old (i hate flying) and I’d drive the dog and huge uhaul 13 hours- I was looking forward to the silence and decompression time. The next day around five hours into my trip is when my BPD mom started the onslaught. (As soon as my stuff was out of the house- I blocked my sister on everything). She started using my partner as a scapegoat, and fighting on my sisters behalf. She laughed at me, called us losers, and then finally got the reaction she was begging for when she threatened to call CPS for my child, because she was going to take her, and we didn’t deserve her. She said she heard him be abusive and I abandoned my sister, and don’t deserve my child anymore because of it….. I was dumbfounded. I couldn’t understand how she was in full support of my sister being a monster in general for months, and then within two days- completely championing for her. My sister has always been the GC though- I was always always the sibling that called out the toxic behavior and wasn’t scared of either of them. Truth teller? I think that’s it. Five hours into my trip, my phone stopped working shortly after my conversation with my mom ended. I had always been on a family plan I shared with my sister. She paid for that, and I paid for all the streaming apps. It all evened out. I tried placing a call, and that’s when I realized service had been stopped. I was in a giant uhaul with my car towed on the back, with my dog, in a random city- no phone, no gps, and no idea what to do. I drove around for about an hour in a huge city and finally found and ATT store, ran in, told them I had no time and just needed a new plan etc. my mother sat with my sister laughing at me before they shut my phone off. They knew I was alone.
My dad has always been my favorite person. I relate with him far more than anyone in my family- but I’m starting to realize he’s been worse than the Nsister or NBPD mother.
I hadn’t talked to any of them in about a month and a half. My dad didn’t contact me. Normally when my mom did this stuff, he would find ways to sneak talking to me. He would try to convince me to apologize and beg for it. He would agree it was her fault, but he would insist I apologize “so the family could be whole”. “Start the healing” “do you just hate your mother? You know how she is, she can’t help it” “just apologize and it will be back to normal” “if she finds out I’m talking to you she will leave me” My mother had always treated me like a mistress of my father’s rather than her daughter. I was always enemy #1, and if she caught him talking to me- it was a major act of betrayal in her eyes. She had gotten so abusive over it in the past (physically/mentally) that I understood why he had to hide it.
The last month an half has been so hard. My other sister as been distant in order to not get caught in the crossfire of my Mom. my mother spent a month at my Nsisters house coddling her, and watching her kids, and cleaning up after her. I spent weeks crying wondering why my dad hadn’t secretly reached out to even just check in about my child. Yesterday I gave in and messaged my dad. He tried to push the whole viewpoint of my mother- that they heard him yelling at me, and they needed to defend me. That I should think about leaving him. My father said my mother was still very angry and so hurt over what I said after she said she was going to take my child. He said he was going to call me once he left the house and wasn’t around her. Once on the phone, he explained he agreed with me leaving, and that my sister was really spiraling, and my mom shouldn’t be involved in the fight or picking sides/daughters. He said I was going to have to apologize. I’m not apologizing. I can’t do it this time. My daughters first birthday is coming up, and for some reason today,‘I got extremely sad over it and messaged my mother- just letting her know I was open to a conversation and would like if she could come to my daughters first birthday party no matter what her feelings are towards me. Her response was insane, ans made me feel so incredibly stupid for reaching out.
“Sorry to say but we have made other plans so we will not be able to come to her party. But we would be happy to send her gifts and stuff she needs. Just to make this very clear I will not ever be around baby’s father after having to listen to his disrespectful. Sorry arse. His father was right about one thing he is lazy as hell. His words at your shower. If baby needs anything just get in touch with your dad or send me a text. As soon as we receive a heartfelt apology we will be more than happy and joyed to come pick you and Jude up so you can spend some time with us.”
We went back and forth for a while- and she just was so hateful the entire time. I kept my cool, and just tried to tiptoe as much as I could. She kept pummeling on my partner- and then when that didn’t work, it was hat I chose his family over my own. That I was not loyal, and what does it matter if she doesn’t talk to me anymore. I kept assuring her I wasn’t abandoning her for them, and she doesn’t have to feel threatened by , and the onslaught continued. She then started defending everything my sister had done, and adding her own twists on it. I told her it was between my sister and me, and to just stop choosing sides- that she could have a relationship with both of us independently, no matter our status with each other. She didn’t care. She said well, that’s your version of the truth, and you have your new family. She kept hammering the point that no one will love my child or me as much as her. My father has a bad habit of saying that as well. She’s demonizing my partner so much through the entire conversation, and he’s so hurt by it too. He offered to apologize instead of me. He said he could go beg her and plead. It made me sick. How absolutely embarrassing. I won’t allow him to do it. I’m not subjecting him to this anymore. My family has always been good at throwing money at problems. No real emotional care, love, or support- but if you have an issue, need, or want?, they will pay for it- and that’s love to them. My sister has adapted it with her children. My mother favors that sister because of money. She’s successful- has a huge house- and my sister buys her whatever she wants when she’s around. (My parents are well off, so I’m not sure why this even matters to her). It’s always a “well I did this for you! That for you! I paid for all of these things!” Most of the time when my mother gave me gifts, it was things she could hold over my head. Once I got older and had my own money, I know she was bothered by not having that control anymore- so I’m sure watching my sister shut my phone off was a long awaited scratch to her itch.
I found out their plans for my daughters first birthday was going to my sisters house.
I cried hysterically for a few hours- and here I am. I’m used to this behavior from her, so I don’t think I’ll mourn the loss of her in a NC- but I can’t get past my dad. Thinking about how old he is getting, and how this is all a giant waste of time that I could have him spending time with my daughter, makes me physically ill. I’m so scared that I won’t be able to see him again because of my mother, and he will eventually pass. I’m sorry if this isn’t too coherent, I’ve been sobbing for hours, and I’m exhausted. My mother has made it obvious that she chooses not only my sister, but her children as well, and my dad is allowing her to drag him along for the ride. I should hate him for it, but I can’t. It destroys me to think of going NC with him or my other sister. She lives far away from all of us, and is extremely busy so doesn’t really get involved with my mom other than surface level. My mother has apologized to me one time. One time in 30+ years. I have bitten the bullet and apologize and begged her to forgive me every single time since I was a preteen for the sake of my dad. I remember there would be times he would call me crying begging me to apologize to her “to make the family whole again”.
The writings on the wall for NC, but I just can’t bring myself to enforce it with my father or my other sister. She has a bad habit of giving updates and sending photos, so I’d probably have to. I don’t want her getting stuck in the middle of it. TIA for any advice.

Hello, for some time now I have been looking into the mormon faith as a whole. None of my family is mormon, I was not raised mormon, this is all of my own volition. I don’t struggle with my attraction as thankfully I was raised with very accepting parents. I’ve been thinking about converting to the church, which is where my problem lies. I do no want to have to suppress who I am, no matter how much I believe in everything else that mormonism preaches, when I have no issue with my identity. I follow every law and rule, I pray every night, I am faithful. But if I am going to be treated differently based on how our very own god created me, than I think it would be best for me and any future spouses or significant others to stay away. Is there any way around that? Because I really, truly am enamored with this faith. Any help is appreciated.

i was with her for 25 months. Around 3am 1 year ago, i kicked her out of my house cuz i caught her cheating thru her text messages. I dont know if I’m over it or not because i personally do not care for her, I just wish I could have the women thats right for me. Ever since that whole incident, my mentality has fortified, standards arose, and my whole mentality and way of thinking has gotten better. It’s just been harder trying to find someone who meets my standards (which honestly isnt crazy; bare minimum)
I’m tired of feeling depressed and down every other day because I dont have a girlfriend. I feel empty, a void waiting to be filled. Yeah focus on myself get money etc etc I know but it doesnt change the fact that I want what I once felt and had… I dont chase anymore because many people I speak thru these dating apps arent intriguing enough to carry on with but I just felt like it was so much easier back then… to talk, to relate, to connect with a girl. Majority of them I talk to are delusional as fuck and just wanna whore around (I dont mean to generalize, Im 23 and I talk to a lot of younger 18+ girls that just arent on my maturity/mental level)
So yeah, I dont really miss the person, just the feeling. But i feel hopeless in getting what I want. I do believe its Gods intention to keep me single and make me focus on better things. But I cant help but feel numb, depressed, very lonely every single day…
Thank you for reading, I just wanted to vent and let this out. There is no answer I am seeking.

I dont like to anything mean about him, but its getting ridiculous. He was doing ok in Texas (he moved there to live with his gf), but then they broke up, and he moved back. He wouldn't say anything about what happened there, even though he said he'd tell everything. And this was a very serious thing because his gf was making some nasty accusations. He hasnt gotten a job in the 2 years hes been here, and he hasnt been helpful (and when he is, he has a nasty attitude). Hes also started a lot of drama for no reason, and it got really bad. Both sides did some dumb shit and at the end of the day they all just looked like bad people. He said that he needed his id updated, so I asked my parents to help him, and we did eventually. He didnt get a job. He says he needs a bank card, and he gets one. Still no job. His reason was the job market. At the same time, I kept suggesting that he go to community college, but he didnt bother with that either. Fast forward to today, and we have no transportation. We get a letter in the mail saying my parents food stamps were getting cut if he doesnt go to college or get a job. Im more forgiving that he doesn't have a job, but I cant for the life of me understand why he hasnt done anything about it. I've even given him all of the resources he'll need except for just filling it out for him. He ends up getting into an argument with me about how all I do is just force stuff like getting a job or going to college at him. I dont know what to say to him, especially considering the fact that if he wanted to do other stuff, he should have come to me.
I dont know if I should just let the pieces fall where they may with him, or do I try one last time to convince him to apply to college, or try harder in applying for a job? What I should do?