Diy wire tree of life

I apologize if this is rambling but I have been trying to collect my thoughts for a long time…
I am at a complete loss as to what to do about the dead bedroom my wife and I are going through these days. A little background:
We met in April of 2016 and moved in together about 6 months later and were engaged after about a year. We were married in 2017 and she got pregnant with our daughter in 2018. All throughout the time we were dating/engaged and first married we had a really good sex life. Once she got pregnant she had zero sex drive. I know that pregnancy can mess with hormones a lot so I didn’t think too much about it. After she gave birth her libido never returned. Since she got pregnant I could probably count on one hand the number of times we have had sex. We are nearing the 4 year mark of the last time we had sex. I have tried multiple different things to get her in the mood such as planning fun dates, romantic dates etc. I also know her love language is acts of service so I have tried cleaning up the entire house to relieve that stress off of her.
We have had multiple conversations about our sex life (or lack thereof) and have never resolved anything. Last October I finally told her I felt like I wanted us to try and find some kind of counseling to see if that could help. The night I asked her about this she was upset (and rightfully so, I can understand why she would have an emotional response to it) and felt like it was sprung on her but neither of us has mentioned it since then.
I am looking for any kind of advice on what I can say or do to find a way to resolve this. In every other way she is a great partner and mother but this has really taken a toll on me. Mentally i understand it should not be impacting my self confidence but it really has. I am not looking for the “get divorced” or “find someone else to have sex with” advice but real honest advice about how I can either help her resolve it or something I can say to help her see that counseling may be the right option.

I get a ton of coaching but I keep losing matches and I’m on a 10 match losing streak rn and every match I lose makes me want to quit I’m actually depressed because of it because I’m losing to people that I’m way better and stronger than. Most of the time if I’m losing badly I just tank it because it makes me feel better than trying and getting beat, but I don’t want to lose anymore matches because it’s embarrassing at this point so I can’t do that anymore. Im not sure what to do because my coach is good but I think there’s something wrong with me because I can’t play for shit and I don’t think I’m getting any better so should I just quit because it’s actually ruining my life

I’m in the UK so we have the NHS. They seem to be 100% on the side of “okay, you’re not dying so you will be fine.” The last doctor I spoke to told me I just need to learn to love with this. I asked if I could see a dietician and she said no because I’m not losing weight quickly enough and I’m not anaemic.
I wonder if there are any countries that put quality of life first so we will work with you until you find your triggers rather than speak to you on the phone for five minutes and say look after it yourself.

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Thats all.

i’m scared my talents will never fully flourish. i’m scared i’m not talented enough, if at all. i’m scared i’ll never be loved or lovable. i’m scared i’ll never be financially or emotionally secure. i’m scared of my mental illnesses taking over when i need to be productive. i’m scared of my insomnia, and how badly it affects my day to day work, or lack thereof. i’m scared of watching my parents age, and seeing it come to fruition. i’m scared to lose them. i’m scared i’ll always be in pain, physically and emotionally. i’m scared i don’t have what it takes to create a life worth living. i’m scared of being useless. i’m scared of loving people who hurt me, like those who’ve done so in the past. i’m scared of hurting others, like i’ve done in the past. i’m scared no one likes me. i’m scared i’ll never have more than one close friend. i’m afraid my other “friends” secretly don’t give a fuck about me. i’m scared i’ll always feel this deep void inside me, and no matter what happens it will never feel full. i’m scared i’m doomed to ache and long and yearn, and just hurt. i’m in a lot of fear. and i wonder if anyone else is as terrified as i am. this world, this life, the society we live in… it feels so overwhelming so much of the time and i feel like i was put on earth before i was emotionally ready to handle it all. i’m trying my best, and i know everyone else is too… does everyone doubt their abilities and their futures this much? and if not, what do you tell yourself or believe about yourself to help you get by when things are difficult? xo

I just feel like a man, I have the soul and mind of a young man, the only differing thing is my genitalia. I don’t like to call myself “transgender” it’s kind of embarrassing for me, I don’t really want to associate with the community, I just want to live the right life, I am “pre-transition” but I think there’s definitely a point where I’ll be done, but even before I don’t feel a need to label myself transgender, I’m not cis either, I’m just a man with a birth defect, honestly.

I played on Friday and probably played the best I ever have. Shot at 90 at a course with a slope rating of 127, which is great for me. I was absolutely throwing darts with my irons and hit 11 of 18 GIR. I was pumped. Having said that, I’ve been struggling with my driver (started pulling a bunch of shots lately) so I decided to scheduled a lesson for today to help get more consistent.
Well, instead of working on my driver at all, the instructor had me swing my 7 iron and then told me that my entire setup, grip and swing fundamentals are way off. We spent the hour going over that.
After the lesson, I went to the range and now I can’t hit the ball. At all. In 48 hours I went from the best 18 holes of my life to not being able to even get the ball in the air.
I only started playing a year ago, so for those of you who’ve been at this way longer….when do you just embrace your swing (faults and all) and just play with it vs. trying to get more fundamentally sound? I honestly don’t know that I have the emotional capacity to re-build my swing and start all over again. If I have to go struggling around the course for the next few months so that my swing looks more “tour-like” I don’t know that I’ll keep playing.
The part that bothers me most is that I took 10 lessons last year, and the instructor I had at that time didn’t point out any of these flaws/issues to me. So one instructor or the other is off, or I’ve developed a bunch of bad habits (while dropping my index by 9 strokes) over the past 8 months.
Vent over.

What’s the most bizarre animal you’ve ever encountered in the wild?

Good morning, afternoon, evening, or night, wherever you might be! (It's evening here in EST; wasn't that a clever way to point out my time zone?) You can call me CC; I'm a long-time roleplay writer (squarely in the middle of my twenties) who's braving the new frontier of Reddit to find partners in storytelling. I'm a big believer in lengthy posts: Not word count over substance, of course, but breathing life into a setting and characters with well-chosen details and, hopefully, a little flair, is something that's near and dear to my heart.
The genre I'm looking to explore, most likely to the chagrin of some of the more high-concept-minded scribes here, is modern-day slice-of-life! (If you closed out of this ad upon reading that, it's okay! High-concept stories are AWESOME, they're just not my strong suit.) I'd thoroughly enjoy getting to craft a playful story with a plucky pair of romantic leads who have a cheeky chemistry, an I-can't-stand-them-but-oh-God-I'm-crushing energy, and a spark that'll see them end up together.
You may notice I'm speaking in broad strokes instead of debuting the prompt for a more specific story, and that's by design! I think stories really sing when writers work together to decide on a setting and plot beats, but, hey, if you ask me to write you something and you'll follow my lead, cool, that works too.
The characters I'm best at writing are typically college-to-young-adult in age, and I most enjoy writing adorkable male leads who are, in some way, an underdog in a power dynamic with their romantic counterpart, starting on the back foot and working tirelessly to go toe-to-toe with her antics.
If this ad speaks to you in any way, shape, or form, please write me and tell me why! Let's do what this post's title says and write something witty, charming, and cheeky.

What's the best prank you've ever pulled on someone?

I don't understand the excess of armor nodes on the barbarian paragon, and I'm even more confused as to why they're such small amounts.
Most importantly I don't understand the existence of them at all, as my armor was completely maxed out the entire 1-50 grind, so these nodes are 100% useless
They need to be mitigation, life, dodge, barrier, literally anything else...

Husband got home last night after having some drinks with friends. I have PTSD but rarely open up to my husband about it because it involves an abusive ex and when I first started dating my husband he didn’t like to hear about my past since he got jealous hearing about me with other guys. Id like to think we’ve grown up since that was over 6 years ago. Anyway I go to therapy occasionally for my PTSD and also anxiety/depression so I tend to let it all out in therapy so I won’t have to bring it up to my husband. Lately I’ve noticed some triggers that have put me in an anxious state. Husband could tell something was up when he got home but I assured him it wasn’t him and that I was just going through it. He kept begging me to open up and I said no we will talk when you’re sober. He convinced me he wasn’t that drunk so stupid me opened up about my PTSD and he legit sat there with a confused look on his face. When I asked what was wrong and why he looked puzzled he said “I don’t understand how you can still have PTSD from an ex. I treat you like a queen, we have an amazing home, an amazing life, make good money and have a great kids. I don’t understand how you’re still depressed over him.” I just started crying because I was so frustrated that he didn’t understand and I felt stupid for opening up and he still sat there looking confused. I didn’t have the energy to explain it any more so I went to bed crying feeling like the one closest to me would never understand my pain.
I know my husband isn’t that uneducated on PTSD and he doesn’t know what happened with my ex in the past but even when he’s sober it can be hard to talk about my past with him. My ex was a physically and mentally abusive alcoholic who I stayed with through 2 rounds of rehab before I called it quits. My husband doesn’t know any of this and that I will likely have PTSD for life for the shit I went through. It’s just sad that he thinks an amazing life can mask the trauma that I went through. Normally I am very happy and can manage well but some days it hits me out of no where.

The writer has made use of many techniques and devices to describe Ugwu's impressions of the city.
Firstly, the author has utilised hyperbolic verbs to describe Ugwu's impressions ofㅓㄷ the city. The author writes, 'too choked with expectation' , 'itched to lay his ch eek.' The use of verbs like 'choked' and 'itched' are used by the author to greatly exaggerate Ugwu’s emotions of ecstasy and excitement, they serve as a method of telling the reader that Ugwu has positive impressions of the city.
Secondly, the author has excluded conjunctions in the first part of the extract. 'Ugwu did not believe…the back of his neck.' The author excluding conjunction[s] creates the impression that Ugwu is so amazed by the city as asyndeton heightens pace and excitement.
Thirdly, the author has made use of parataxis to show Ugwu's positive impressions of the city. 'But he did not mind. He was prepared to walk more in even hotter sun.' The use of short sentences places emphasis on Ugwu’s shock of the conditions of the city.
Finally, the author has made use of similes to convey Ugwu's amazement. The author writes 'like polite well-dressed men' ; ' like tables wrapped with leaves.' The use of similes with positive connotations, 'well-dressed', conveys the idea that Ugwu only has positive thoughts about the city, [this is supported by an absence of information stating otherwise].
_____
0 4
Focus this part of your answer on the second part of the source, from line 20 to the end. A student said, ‘From the moment he arrives at Master’s compound, the writer portrays Ugwu’s feelings of pure excitement, but by the end it seems that he may be very disappointed.’
To what extent do you agree?
In your response, you could:
• consider your own impressions of Ugwu’s feelings
• evaluate how the writer describes Ugwu’s feelings by the end
• support your response with references to the text.
[20 marks]
One way the author has conveyed this impression is through the way they ended the story. At the end of this extract they wrote 'Ugwu stood by the door, waiting,' this contrasts to the previous 'choked with expectations.' In the end it seems Ugwu’s expectations were grossly inflated which may in the end lead to him becoming very disappointed.
On the other hand, there are moments where it is possible that Ugwu may have been emotionally neutral. The author has written quite vaguely, not allowing the reader to truly know whether Ugwu was disappointed or not, however, judging as Ugwu’s expectations are based off of his imagination and greeness, it is likely that he isn't disappointed but instead shocked and as a result putting on a more realistic mindset. Ugwu is constantly amazed, although, his master doesn't seem very welcoming 'faintly distracted expression,' 'oblivious that he had just asked people in.' It has little to no relation to his expectations, ' something sweet,' 'good fortune,' 'like a necklace,''never seen a room so wide.' Ugwu still only being amazed shows that he as a matter of fact isn't disappointed.
Another reason he may not be disappointed is because of the reason for his excitement. Ugwu is excited to to be in a place so different from where he is from ,'thatch roof,', the author has portrayed Ugwu as not excited for for the job or for the master, but, for the new experience, this is evident throughout the extract, 'the lawn glistened,' 'shaped like slender hills,' the use of similes being used to compare the setting places emphasis on the idea that it is not the master or the job that excites Ugwu, meaning that he can't be disappointed with for having a lackluster master[, or for something he doesn't seem very keen on in the first place].
It could also be said however, that Ugwu is disappointed. Whilst this isn't said or *noticed* in the extract it can be inferred from the extract. This inference could be made from Ugwu’s master's response to him which almost demeaned Ugwu, 'the child?,' 'remember something more important.' The use of the comparative 'more important' means that the Master doesn't view Ugwu as anything important, and so the reader infers that in response to that Ugwu feels depressed and slightly disappointed as things might not be as 'sweet' as he had previously thought.
In conclusion, I do agree with the student's statement as the sudden juxtaposition/change in mood has led me to believe that before he was cheery and after he was disappointed or melancholic.
​
---
Q2
If there are few moments in life that come as clear and as pure as ice, when the mountain breathed back at her, Zoe knew that she had trapped one such moment and that it could never be taken away. Everywhere was snow and silence. Snow and silence; the complete arrest of life; a rehearsal and a pre-echo of death. She pointed her skis down the hill. They looked like weird talons of brilliant red and gold in the powder snow as she waited, ready to swoop. I am alive. I am an eagle.
How does the writer use language here to describe Zoe’s feelings?
You could include the writer’s choice of:
• words and phrases
• language features and techniques
• sentence forms.
[8 marks]
The writer to describe Zoe’s feelings has made use of a variety of language devices and techniques. How the author has done so will be explored in this 8 mark question.
Firstly, the author has made use of a perspective switch to describe her feelings. The author writes 'she waited, ready to swoop. I am alive. I am an eagle.' The noun 'eagle' has connotations of of freedom and exhilaration. The author has switched the perspective to place emphasis on these connotations, saying that Zoe feels free and exhilarated,[additionally,] another way emphasis is placed on this is the switch to the first person perspective which personalises Zoe’s situation for the reader making it easy to understand that perhaps Zoe does feel free.
Secondly, the author has described Zoe’s feelings through the use of repetition. The author writes 'every where was snow and silence.' The repetition of 'snow' and 'silence' places emphasis on the idea that snow was all there was for her creating an impression of total serenity, making the reader think that Zoe is at total peace.
Lastly, the author has made use of parataxis and asyndeton. The author writes 'snow and silence; the complete arrest of life; a rehearsal.' The use of asyndeton and parataxis both create excitement and increase the pace of the story which may have been included by the author to replicate Zoe’s feelings, namely that of excitement.

So let me start this off by saying that I absolutely do NOT idolise him or "like" him in any. He was a monster and even just saying what I said in the title pains me. I also don't have his intrusive thoughts thankfully. I'm also 16 so I am aware I have a lot of time to change. That being said, I recently watched the Netflix show without much knowledge to his story and I sorta related to him before he started his killings, he was rather monotone, isolated and seemingly disinterested in people and had a direct communication style, he was also kinda arrogant sometimes, but what I noticed is that he had a pretty sad and boring life, my concern is that I'm gonna end up like that too due to my similarities with him and just be an alcoholic loner. My parents said I was like this ever since I was born, I was always reserved, never caused problems, didn't really want anything out of life. I have a few close online friends but only one irl friend, I used to have more but I distanced myself from then since I started high school. I barely talk to any girls, the girls in my class are either taken or just mean or both, my school has no clubs. Also I have no romantic interest in men and even if I was, most people in my country aren't really supportive of gay people, especially guys, so that wouldn't work out. Sometimes I try and get out of my comfort zone and go to festivals or to other events with my parents but I just find myself bored and not having a good time. I go to the gym though and I like it there so that's good I guess. Like I said before I don't wanna reach adulthood and be a weird loner like Dahmer. I'm not sure where i'm going with this, I just wanted to see what you guys think of this. Also sorry for any grammatical errors english isn't my native language and all.

Good morning, afternoon, evening, or night, wherever you might be! (It's evening here in EST; wasn't that a clever way to point out my time zone?) You can call me CC; I'm a long-time roleplay writer (squarely in the middle of my twenties) who's braving the new frontier of Reddit to find partners in storytelling. I'm a big believer in lengthy posts: Not word count over substance, of course, but breathing life into a setting and characters with well-chosen details and, hopefully, a little flair, is something that's near and dear to my heart.
The genre I'm looking to explore, most likely to the chagrin of some of the more high-concept-minded scribes here, is modern-day slice-of-life! (If you closed out of this ad upon reading that, it's okay! High-concept stories are AWESOME, they're just not my strong suit.) I'd thoroughly enjoy getting to craft a playful story with a plucky pair of romantic leads who have a cheeky chemistry, an I-can't-stand-them-but-oh-God-I'm-crushing energy, and a spark that'll see them end up together.
You may notice I'm speaking in broad strokes instead of debuting the prompt for a more specific story, and that's by design! I think stories really sing when writers work together to decide on a setting and plot beats, but, hey, if you ask me to write you something and you'll follow my lead, cool, that works too.
The characters I'm best at writing are typically college-to-young-adult in age, and I most enjoy writing adorkable male leads who are, in some way, an underdog in a power dynamic with their romantic counterpart, starting on the back foot and working tirelessly to go toe-to-toe with her antics.
If this ad speaks to you in any way, shape, or form, please write me and tell me why! Let's do what this post's title says and write something witty, charming, and cheeky.

This is my first year of high school and it’s been a very hard transition for me. I have increased anxiety because of an altercation I had in the Fall and it’s been hard to go to school every day, I simply don't feel safe.
However, my grades don’t reflect that and I catch up on everything online. This is not permanent but I just need the extra time and support to bring my level up to where it should be.Last week I received a text from my grandma that I found incredibly insensitive. Apparently she had been talking to my dad and heard about me missing a few days that week. She then proceeded to tell me I was lazy and if I didn’t get my life together she would come over to show me the consequences. The same thing happened to my brother when my parents struggled to find him a place in school, she threatened to call CPS on my mom for “neglect.” He has autism and they couldn’t get a secure placement until a few months ago.
It's not the first time either. Last June she absolutely ruined my grad shopping experience by constantly body shaming me. I got the first and only dress I tried on after being in the shop for less than 30 mins. She took over everything and then decided to bill my dad for her time.She’s the type of person to use the brutally honest excuse and hide behind it.
Everyone else accepted it but I finally snapped at her. I told her if she wasn’t going to be a helpful asset in my life, she shouldn’t be in it at all and doesn’t deserve my respect just because she’s old.The conversation ended there and I haven’t heard from her since. She has been in contact with my dad and gave me one week to give her an in person apology or accept that I didn't have her side as family anymore, and I chose not to apologize because I didn't think I was in the wrong.
Anyway, I found out today that she has been telling every family member not to buy any birthday gifts/ return the ones already purchased for me. Even going as far as rubbing it in my face by only getting my brother special gifts instead, and he whole family is playing along. Dinner is tomorrow and I’ve been since uninvited. The gifts aren’t my problem, it’s the fact she’s a grown woman going behind my back and acting like the victim. What's worse is everyone is okay with it happening, it's like they're jealous of a child.I don’t know what to do, Am I in the wrong?

I (14f) am exploring my identity. I wear clothes that I like, I dye my hair, but my mom doesn’t like that.
I bleached the underside of my hair two years ago, and I had to beg my mom to let me do it. Once she did it, she said she’d never do it again. She was upset that I was “copying” other people on the internet. She once took my phone while it was unlocked and went on Pinterest, where she found a person with hair similarly colored to mine on the home page. No matter how much I explained I had never even seen that person in my life, she got mad and accused me of lying. Fortunately, after lots of begging the next year, I was able to re-bleach it- though I am unsure as to whether I’ll be able to in the future.
After that, I wanted to change up my closet.. I was unhappy with the way I dressed and whenever I wanted to wear anything my mom didn’t like, she accused me of copying other people. Now, keep in mind that I dress modestly. It isn’t bad, inappropriate, or revealing, she just doesn’t like that I don’t wear what she likes. Last week I asked her to buy me a pair of pajama shorts since it is nearing summer and it’s difficult to sleep when I am overheating. She then proceeds to tell me, “Who told you to buy them? Are you copying someone from school?”
My dad doesn’t mind what I buy because I’ve always been picky with clothes, and I’m sure he’s relieved I finally know what I like. My mom tells me that about 5 shirts and 5 pants are enough for a year. She says I only need one pair of shoes. My dad disagrees with her, but she doesn’t care. “Buy her one more thing and I won’t even speak to her!”, she says. It usually doesn’t matter what I buy, she’ll always think I’m copying someone.
This isn’t limited to my closet and hair, it goes a lot deeper too.
She doesn’t believe me when I say I dress for myself and thinks I’m doing it all for someone else. How do I get her to believe me when I say I don’t have anyone telling me what to wear? And how do I get her to stop thinking in that mindset?

Hey reddit, let me start out with an apology for any errors I make, I'm dyslexic, this is my first time posting here, and I'm still really anxious and upset about everything going on, in particular as I have diagnosed PTSD and G.A.D. It also is probably appropriate to give a trigger warning for just about anything one could be sensitive too, from assault, to cancer, to death, because my life has had it all lately.... This is the very long winded story of how my neighbor couple, who are a toxic combination of entitled and addicted to some kind of uppers, are trying to make my life a living hell, and, how I am not retaliating and it's somehow making them even more hateful...
Relevant backstory about me/my home situation- I (36F) bought my house all by myself (yah!) in 2016 before everything got super expensive. I am a career musician, but because what I make performing in an indie band and in royalties varies WILDLY from year to year, I also am proud to be the primary child care provider for my niece, and three other long time family friend's children who are now between the ages of 5 and 7 but have come to my home for daycare and even over nights and weekends sometimes since they were infants we're all like a little extended family. I live alone other than my little pets and the children who are often here.
In June 2022 I was misdiagnosed with Inflammatory Breast Cancer (most deadly kind of breast cancer) and spent 6 weeks helping my parents and the kids and my friends get ready to help me... then lose me basically, before it was determined it was NOT inflammatory breast cancer (yah!) I just had Regular old precancerous tissue being made to look even worse than it was because the tissue had also developed an antibodic-resistant infection allll over the tissue under my breast. Ultimately good news except the very next day one of the moms in our little childcare group died instead. Like some kind of nasty joke God was making that wasn't funny and I'm still not over. Then, my insurance company decided to fight me over surgery to have the tissue and infection removed while cycling me through endless rounds of antibiotics and more invasive (but cheaper for my insurance) treatments. I did the best I could to keep up with my home and life and still help with the kids but I was *really really* sick until February of this year (2023) when I finally got my surgery, and I'm still really struggling with the lose of my friend both for myself and her son. I also have no money or savings or anything of a safety net left anymore. I had to access it all while I was sick and paying for my surgery/medical care (so you now know I'm American I suppose).
Now, onto the neighbors...
In August 2022, this couple moved in nextdoor and have been single handedly changing the block vibe from "Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood where a few of the parents smoke weed here and there" to "Nightmare on Elm Street featuring Crack" and I am not sure that I have ever seen so up close and personal the inner workings of.... sociopaths? Or whatever the correct name for people who are habitual lairs and take pleasure in causing harm to others (and maybe each other?). They are heavy drinkers, heavy cannabis users (no shade, I got my med card before surgery and with edibles I didn't even need other prescription pain meds!! but anything can be a problem for some people), and most unfortunately they do some kind of pills or something that make them very "up". While the wife is typically too "out of it" to maintain work, the husband works from home as some type of an accountant and seems to keep it together, and make just enough money, to maintain their "lifestyle" which basically means they do a lot of drugs and super weird addict things, but with an aura of entitlement. It's a toxic combination.
The couple, who I will call Sackie (44F) and Jam(41M), originally presented themselves as an older couple with Sackie in particular having many health issues.... and I will admit I first mistook her for being older and originally assumed her manner of speaking (a bit low, mumbled and slurred, without a good awareness to social cues or appropriateness, like trying to talk to me about how her brother molested her but her mom payed off the law to make it go away or how later she started a business with said mom, but her mom started having an affair with Jam's boss and that's how they met... in front of the children and/or in maybe my second conversation with her) for some kind of stroke. It was only after many awkward rambling conversations with Sackie that I realized they were actually not much older at all, and her many health issues (more on this later) were fictional or simply from withdrawals/drug use. I did learn, however, that Jam and Sackie have a long, sorted, unpleasant history, with just about everyone they'd ever met... and somehow, it was always they who were the victims.
Now, I try very hard not to victim blame and I know from personal experience that sometimes good people have strings of unfortunate events in their lives-- but Sackie's recounts of events were often hard to understand, or contradictory to previous stories she had told, sometimes even within the same conversation. So I knew almost right away she wasn't a reliable narrator, but, with our houses being located about 12 feet apart, my original misinterpretation of them as an older couple, and with Sackie intentionally lying about some things to get my sympathy.... I had no idea how bad they both really were or what I was in for...
I first spoke with Sackie more than just saying hi in passing sometime around Thanksgiving (American Thanksgiving) when she knocked on my door to ask if she and Jam could give me an extra out door Christmas ornamental they had. I thought they were just being Christmasy and kind. I didn't have the kids at my house that week and Sackie smelled the cannabis I had been enjoying on my couch (a rarity honestly) and said, "oh is that what I think it is?" Paranoid that she was offended I blurted out, "oh yes I have a cannabis prescription, this is probably TMI but if you notice me home and slagging a lot it is because I am waiting for breast surgery."
Sackie's face lite up, "Thats not TMI, I'm waiting for breast surgery too! I had uterine cancer and now I'm waiting for a double mastectomy. And don't worry I'm a medical user too" Now, I have since learned this to be a lie, but at the time it definitely made me feel sorry for her and I was just relieved I hadn't been "caught" by a neighbor who was offended by cannabis.
However, once Sackie learned I had weed.... well, she wanted to be my best friend. In fact, she almost invented a fantasy friendship with me. Asking for my number in case they needed someone to look in on their pets during the holidays to quickly turned to her calling and texting pages and pages of messages-- about how Jam abused her, and was cheating on her, how she had nobody and was so scared approaching her (fake) upcoming double mastectomy, how he'd made sure her name wasn't on the house when they bought it and he'd locked her out of all their money... and could she please have some weed because she was so sick? Oh she had a seizure because she was so sick could she please have some weed?? It went on and on, always about wanting weed, rides places, confusing pages of texts about how she was watching "dead to me" and how it was so unfair she didn't have a friend like those characters?? Could I be that friend??
It was intense. And I didn't handle it well. I did my best to just respond to her slower and slower apart and just be nice but short and say no that I didn't have or couldn't do XYZ for her.
Her begging and neediness intensified rapidly, sometimes she would come to my door and knock and ask for weed and I would feel obligated to give it to her just to get her away. She was always on something a lot more intense than weed when she'd knock. It was scary and sometimes the kids were here. She started texting me asking if I had "anything stronger" than weed and when I was understandablely like "no I don't do those things" she sent me about four pages about how she just meant "xanxa" because she used to have a standing prescription for xanxa and it helped her so much but she had "quit all her medicine except good ol weed and seeing a chiropractor" and was doing oh so much better now but just needed some but it was okay because she found another friend to give it to her.
This was the first time I expressly told her no and not to ask me about that type of thing and where she started to turn her fantasy friendship into me into a fantasy feud.
Shortly after she sent me another page long text saying, "not to be a bitch but I'm done with our one sided friendship." I responded that I understood, at this point it was Dec 22nd (2022) and I was just trying to spend time with my family. I said something like, "I understand, I have some health problems that make it hard for me to make new friends or even keep up with my current friends, but I will see you around as a neighbor." And hoped to never hear from her again.
Oh, how short that hope was. Several days later I started getting pages of frantic apologies, but also trying to make me feel guilty, and more frantic apologies, and letting me know that Jam is not cheating on her and evil and leaving her with nothing, and they're both such great people and always here if I need anything!!!
It's honestly hard to explain how unstable even her "nice" texts would sound and I'm not sure if we can post screen shots in this sub, but trust me, this woman and her husband are just constant, intense, invasive drama. While she and Jam both made me uncomfortable, almost like watching for when I would first let my dogs out in the morning or when a friend left my house and texting me about it... waiting on their front porch chain smoking for me to come outside then rushing over to talk-block me into conversations about other neighbors they hated, Jam's bosses affair with Sackie's mom, to tell me how sick they were, about how Sackie had to quit multiple jobs because her bosses would always sexually harass her... And stupid me would just try to kinda smile and nod and get out of the conversation.
I was so uncomfortable and somewhat scared of them because of the way they would talk about other people and each other and... its hard to describe but if anyone has even been close with someone using something like meth, you know how crazy their behaviors can be, even if they are being "nice." But until April 2023, they were just a bother, not a danger.
April was when Sackie's fantasy friendship with me turned into a full blown fantasy feud...
In early April, I was supposed to be recovered enough from surgery that I could work again so I to started to watch the children every week again, and apply for music gigs again... but unfortunately got a staph infection in my left breasts wound. I ended up being in a lot of pain and back on antibiotics and pretty out of it on my couch for a few days, though I managed not to be hospitalized again (yah!).
During the few days I was pretty much out of it during the infection, Jam and Sackie decided it would be a good time to get really "uppered" to rip up all the ornamental ivy in our shares breezeway (fine) but also OFF THE SIDE OF MY HOUSE AND OUT AROUND MY FRONT PORCH. They pulled down wires on the side of my house and did this during rainy season meaning they exposed my homes foundation to massive amounts of water no longer protected by plants and top soil.
I was in total shock. They hadn't asked permission, or even mentioned disliking the ivy, and they were clearly on something and STILL trying to rip up things around my front porch.
My kind, 70 year old father was over on April 14th, to help me do some weatheseason appropriate yard work I was struggling to do one my own because of the staph infection and we decided we had to try to say something to them about it, because at this point they were out front talking about what they were going to do AROUND MY FRONT PORCH. But again, wanting to keep peace my dad and I went outside and my dad just politely asked Sackie about what they were doing and, said something along the lines of, "well okay, just please don't do anything else on our side because we are going to take care of that ourselves..." and before he could even finish Sackie suddenly, in her slurred speech, yells "Do you think I'm fucking Stupid??" at my dad.
Now, at this point I can't take it anymore. My father thought he was going to have to change my diapers while I DIED this year. He does not deserve to be yelled at by some methed out neighbor. So I said, "Sackie, don't speak to my father that way, he is just looking out for me."
At which point Sackie LOSES IT and starts hollering to Jam and possibly just herself about how my dad and I are "so rude and trashy" and how they can do whatever they want because, they want things to look nice, etc etc, at which point I was just like, "come one dad let's go inside."
My dad and I worked on some chores in the back yard, then he was like, "I know we didn't do anything wrong, but let's go apologize because you don't want to have neighbor issues."
However, when we went back out front Sackie was literally pacing back and forward in the breezeway ranting to herself about how she had every right to do whatever she wanted with what I can only describe as a look of pure and total unhinged insanity. You know how when actors play their first role on screen after doing stage acting for years and so their movements come across as completely over the top? That's a lot how Sackie looked that day stalking up and down alley talking to herself, like a director had just told her, "act really nuts!" Except Sackie wasn't acting. My dad said, "okay, well, we tried, some people just want to be upset," to me, and we went back to working on my house.
Keep in mind, I was still on heavy duty antiboditics and fighting a staph infection at this time, and was trying to get the house in shape for my kiddo who's mom had passed away to be able to sleep over at my house that night to give his dad a little break. I figured Sackie would bitch about me to Jam and whoever else she could get to listen (like how she would speak about others to me) but eventually get over it and go back to trying to have her fantasy friendship with me, because after all, she was able to nag me into giving her free weed occasionally, and all my dad and I had done was ask her not to do anything else on my property, right? How mad could she be?)
Well, apparently, something I have now learned, is when someone addicted to uppers decides you are their fixation, they are as addicted to causing you hell.
The following day Sackie (and Sam according to her texts) sent me pages and pages of texts, again I'm not sure on the character limits or screen shot policy here, but basically she sent me about 10 text pages about how my dad and I were so rude and disgusting and she and Jam had the right to do anything they wanted as the breezeway is "their's " (again, that is their property on that side but only up until a foot and half or so away from my house, and definitely not around my front porch) and how she and Jam have always been so nice to me and I'm just such a terrible person, and "YOU'RE WELCOME " for how that side of my house will look?
She used a lot more curse words and details than that, many of which were not even truthful and were hard to understand, and kept bringing up a Tupperware container and a cloth canvas bag that she had left some kind of soup she made for my friend (my friend who Sackie also made extremely uncomfortable but would try to be polite to her when she was outside smoking) when my friend had to stay with me for a few weeks after she had to get a hysterectomy and needed help recovering, and saying "and just throw out that Tupperware I gave you, you have no idea the kind of niceness I've constantly given to you!" (remember friends, even this major pushover knows-- kindness done with the expectation of something in return is just manipulation) Like, somehow this unwanted soup she'd left my friend when she was recovering here in March 2023, made it okay for her to do whatever she wanted on my property?
This also feels like an appropriate time to add that it was when my friend was recovering at my house that I learned the extent of Sackie's lies about her health. Remember how I said she'd gained my sympathy by pretending she had breast cancer and was waiting on a double mastectomy? Her story was that she had found out she had uterine cancer after a miscarriage and she'd had to have a full hysterectomy and the cancer had spread and so she needed a double mastectomy now but she was having trouble with her insurance and her husband, that is why she wanted to mold me into her "Dead to Me" friend, right?
Nope. Apparently not. As, she told my friend that, "she knew exactly what she was going through because she had just terrible, terrible, periods and has endometriosis too, just like my friend, but she hasn't been able to get the hysterectomy she needed yet because she didn't have a doctor because she didn't do Western Medicine anymore, all she needed was a chiropractor and weed... oh and the hysterectomy for her terrible endometriosis just like my friend." She also said something that implied her husband was getting her a boob job, for cosmetic reasons, and there had never been cancer at all. I have no idea if the miscarriage was a lie too or not, and it isn't really relevant other than to stress, that Sackie and her husband really have a hard time with the truth.
Anyway, after her round of nasty texts after the ivy incident, I sent her back an extremely polite and short text, saying I was sorry she felt so offended by my dad and I asking her not to do anything else on my property, and I was very happy to respect their wishes for us not to communicate and I wished them well.
The next two weeks or so, until April 29th 2023, Sackie and Jam made me uncomfortable but were manageable. They did things like intentionally stacking hay against my fence, talking loudly to each other about how "trashy" I was, and at one point in time even pretending to do yard work but actually just smashing the side of my house with shovels! They even had someone else over at some point they were intentionally loud explaining too about how disgusting the ivy was and what a favor they were doing "cleaning it up".... but honestly I didn't even really care.
My paralegal friend recommended I start documenting things though, because she said some of the worst people she's seen in court are functional, entitled, drug addicts and I should not assume they would return to reason, and that it would be a good idea if I let the Neighborhood Stabilization Officer know what was going on, start documentation, and draft up a cease and desist to send if they did anything else and man, she was right, so right in fact, we didn't even have time to send the cease and desist.
On April 24th, out of nowhere, she sent me another several pages of unhinged texts, once again talking about how I should thank her for ripping up my ivy, throw away her Tupperware, how I was a terrible person and she and her husband and everyone think I'm on the Spectrum (hey man, autism is highly under diagnosed in women and that isn't the insult they think it is, but I could tell she thought she was calling me the R word), and just nasty absurd abusive things.
I sent her a text simply saying "Do not communicate with me or anyone at my house or threaten me or my pets again."
I found that dumb Tupperware and canvas bag she kept bringing up like it was gold, and put them on a porch along with another letter saying the same as in my text.
Jam responded this time, by smashing the Tupperware and leaving it back on my porch....
Now on April 29th, while I was hosting a sleep over for 3 of the children, and, as bad as this couple had been, I honestly believed they weren't bad enough to cause me trouble when the children were here with me. Looking back, I can't tell you why I gave them that kind of credit. Sackie self published a childrens book in her early 30's, and spoke of volunteering at children's libraries, at least according to her, and I suppose I thought that meant she'd have a respect for kids even if they did not have respect for me.... once again, I was wrong.
Around 5 or 6pm, the kids and I went out onto my front porch to bring our pizza inside at the same time as Sackie was getting out of getting out of her drug dealers car with him, she began screaming profanities at me, saying I was disgusting, threatening the pets, and other things I couldn't really understand fully due to her slurred speech once again but verbally assaulting me but this time, in front of the children was the last straw I had.
I quickly got the kids inside, away from her, and served them the pizza. I told them not to worry about the neighbor, that she was a kind of sick that made people yell when they shouldn't sometimes and they should just ignore her. I made sure they were content talking amongst themselves and eating pizza and strawberries- and went to call the police and finally told them about all the ongoing harassment, threats, begging, drug use, and now screaming and profanities in front of the children and asked for help.
Then I got ahold of one of the other moms who came and picked up all three of the kids, and we just pretended that we decided it was a better idea for them have a sleep over at her friend's house than mine. The kids were fine, but as soon as they left I lost it. Just big gut crying. The months of being nagged for weed, rides, and favors, getting passive aggressive texts about not being Sackie's new insta best friend, feeling like I was being watched constantly, worrying about Sackie saying inappropriate things in front of the children, dealing with Jam's creepy stares and used car sales man persona, the past weeks of their new upper fueled obsession with my property line and being the new fixation of their abuse, trying to be kind to them even as I struggled with my breast disease and Sackie trying to me as an emotional punching bag and free weed. I was finally crying so so so hard, my neighbors on my other side (a lovely couple my age) heard and rushed out and had me come wait inside and were so so so nice to me while I looked insane (did I forget to mention I'd let the kids 'do' my make up, meaning they'd painted my whole face with eye shadow including giving me a sparkly beard?) until the police arrived.
Now I live in a really nice neighborhood, but I am in one of the highest crime cities in America and our politicians and police staff are internationally questioned, so I was actually really impressed that the police came, cared, and, that somehow in my state, I *still* apparently looked less insane than Sackie and Jam.
They responded fairly quickly, and patiently looked over the wild texts from Jackie, my accounts of her and Jam passively terrorizing me, and checked out the side of my yard which they had originally ripped up the ivy and started this whole insane fantasy fight with me over.
They very much believed me and said I should have called them sooner, which surprised me. Sackie refused to come out and speak with the police but Jam came out to speak to the police via using his back door so Sackie could keep hiding.
The police came back and let me know that if Jam was the lesser of my two issues that I needed to becareful because they couldn't do anything on "hear say" but that Sackie had refused to speak with them and Jam reeked of alcohol. They said they told them to leave me alone, and that I had already agreed to do the same, and to just leave me alone, but that if they did anything I needed to call them because of how bad Jam, the lesser of the two, looked.
They left, I thanked them and my kind neighbors and felt like, it must be over right? Because if you do things like send pages of rambling violent, threatening texts, destroy property, and take so many drugs that your speech is slurred 24/7, and the cops come and tell you stop bothering your neighbor, you'd be scared right?
Again, I was mistaken to assume that Sackie and Jam's line of thinking would be at all on the side of logic, even in terms of simple self preservation. As soon as the cops left, Sackie and Jam came into my front yard and began to loudly talk about how disgusting I was to each other again. At this point I have both of their numbers blocked on my phone, but Sackie must has used one of those apps that allows you to text people who have blocked you and messaged me... "Have a great weekend"
So I go ahead and call the police who again, I am both pleased, and surprised, and a little scared by how quickly they return because my city is very high crime and for them to pay any attention to my calls means they must have clocked the neighbors as actual threat.
Sackie and Jam did go inside before the police came back though, and this time they both simply refused to open the door to the police. I imagine they had done many more drugs at this point.
The police said that they couldn't do anything since technically nothing had a record yet, but suggested that I file for a restraining order and provided all of the information I needed to do so. I was still sort of wishy washy about having a legal issue with my neighbors, but after talking it over with a few close girlfriends, one of them messaged me passionately outside of our little group chat about how much this couple, Sackie in particular, was behaving like a lot like her mother, a meth addict with a sense of entitlement who made her neighbors and everyone around hers life hell, obsessing over property lines and turned down begging, until eventually went to prison for 13 years for stabbing my friends dad. He lived thankfully.
But she was right, and my earlier mentioned paralegal friend helped me put together my paper work and evidence for a restraining order which we filed that Monday (April 30th).
They were served their papers on May 4th and thankfully, that *did* scare them into leaving me alone. Jam and Sackie would still intentionally talk badly about me to each other outside when they knew I could hear, and I imagine Sackie was trying to tell anyone who would listen what a bitch I was, but as long as myself and the children were unbothered I felt fine.
The court date came and I made the mistake again of assuming court mediation would be enough. Sackie showed up using a cain and pretending to be feeble, sickly and older, like she had done to me when we first met. Jam still looked creepy but wore a suit. My lawyer, who is also my middle school boyfriends father as an aside, was pretty confident I could get a full restraining if we went to court, but they agreed to restraining order terms as long as it stayed off their record for the purposes of background checks.
The way this works in my city is if they violate the terms it then automatically becomes a full order of protection-- but if they don't it gives them a chance to keep their records clean. It also would save me some money, because even though my lawyer was handling things at friend prices he couldn't do it for free. So I agreed to that. They were to stay away from me, my guests, not contact me on any platform, not harm me or my pets, it all seemed pretty fair and reasonable to me.
But alas, Sackie and Jam are not reasonable people. Literally the moment they got home from court Jam began working on some kind of project in his back yard, cursing about me to himself and clearly back on some kind of upper, he assembled and drilled this... strange tarp thing to my fence ???? Yes, my fence, and yes, this is illegal but I didn't have any luck getting the police to come out this time.
It has continued on this way. Them trying to do everything they can to harass me as much as possible without technically violating the order.
They're still trying to make my life hell, and, I am pretty sure my only option is to wait for them to physically harm me, on camera, for anything to happen.
So yes. That is how I kept trying to give my neighbors the benefit of the doubt, and in exchange, they're making my life hell. As I type this now Jam is out in the front yard, hovering on our property line, watering the grass, breathing heavy, grunting, and giving my ring camera dirty looks.
I don't have a good way to wrap this up, but, it felt good writing it all out to share anonymously. Thankyou reddit.
neighborsfromhell

Have you ever had a moment of clarity that completely changed your perspective on life?