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I am just starting to learn how to code (again) and am confused as to which languages would help land me a job. I don't want to waste time learning things that aren't necessary for that. I have background in HTML and CSS, but would have to review a LOT.
Every post I see seems to list different languages as almost "essential", which I assume is just cause there are so many specializations that go under the term "programmer". So I am not sure where to go after learning python. I am gonna learn SQL alongside python and am thinking about JavaScript after this. What else do I need to make myself marketable as a programmer?
Also, I am not sure what I want to do as in front vs back end or what exactly I want to specialize in (I just know I love coding and creating stuff). Because of this, I don't know where to really start and feel a bit lost. Hoping someone who was in my shoes can help me figure this out.
The resources I use right now are The Odin Project and 100 days of Code.

For context, my boyfriend and I have been dating for 1 year and 2 months. Prior to us dating we were super good friends. We both wanted to date about 3 years prior to when we actually began dating but I was already on my way to graduate school and he has admitted that he didn’t pursue a relationship at that time because he didn’t want me to feel like I shouldn’t go off to school. Just to be clear, I would never have not gone to graduate school, but I respect that he never tried to make me feel like I shouldn’t leave.
So let’s get into it. We met in November of 2017. My brother died in October 2017 at the age of 23 (I was 27 at the time) in a car accident. My brother meant the world to me and we were very close (best friends for sure).
One of the major reasons I was drawn to my current boyfriend was his love and respect for his sisters. When we first met, which was a month after my brother’s death, he could not stop talking about one of his sisters. He has two sisters total but one in particular he was closer with and that has become more obvious to me over time.
I remember struggling through my grief a month after my brother’s funeral death and listening to him discuss his sister like no problem. Mind you, he has never asked me anything specific about my brother (though he does “listen” when I need to talk). When I was really going through the throes of my grief, he would not let up: He had to bring up an instance, situation, experience, or what-have-you regarding his sister whenever he had the chance.
Flash forward to today: Unfortunately my boyfriend’s mom died in September 2022 (so very recently). I have always been here to offer advice or just a listening ear (because I know how it feels). My boyfriend can’t express himself, though, unless he’s drunk enough. Again, for context, my boyfriend was very close with his mom while his two sisters were estranged from her (because they decided to be). So, because of this, his sisters often come up in our drunken conversations.
This is the evidence I have gathered that give my allegations weight: 1. One night we were talking and my boyfriend referred to his sister as “the love of his life” and then, after saying this, attempted to explain that that “sounds weird but it’s not.” Not gonna lie, I was jealous of this statement but I didn’t mention this feeling to him at the time.

1. He consistently refers to his sister as a “wh*re” because of the way she dressed in high school and because of how many people he knows she slept with (I have asked him if he knows this about her for sure and he is adamant that they shared this information between one another.)
   
2. Again, while drinking a few months ago, “Tied Up” by Casey Veggies and Dej Loaf came on my playlist. I’ve loved that song since it came out and I thought this would be the perfect song to dedicate to my boyfriend. Before I could even say anything he could not stop talking about how him and his sister would listen to this song together all the time because she sent it to him years ago.
   

A couple months ago, I was drunk (ugh) and I came at him and said that him and his sister seemed to have had some type of sexual relationship. I don’t have proof of this and it was foul of me to say and I made a mistake. Ever since, I have apologized profusely and genuinely about this comment. I have told him that I made these allegations one night while drinking and I regret what I said and I apologize. He continues to bring these allegations up at least once a week.
What is going on here? I know I’m not perfect and IATA a lot of the time… but I genuinely am confused about how my boyfriend feels about his sister. He just went to bed angry (after smashing my dartboard over his head of course) because I told him that he once told me his sister was “the love of his life” and he is certain that he never said that (but I know he did because it has haunted me since).
Has anyone experienced this? What should I do? Does he love his sister and not me?
TLDR: I’m afraid my boyfriend romantically loves his sister and I’m trying to fight a battle I cannot win.

So I came in and passed the Security + exam today. My score was an 803.
I don’t have an IT background (degree in biology) and no concrete IT work experience. So obviously I came in at a disadvantage. There were a lot of things I didn’t know about and had to pack in my brain. The one thing I did have was my CCNA certification. So that definitely helped me on the network side of things. However many many things were entirely new to me. Such as PKI, using Windows and Linux, CIA triad, hardening OS, attacks and defense, software/applications, tools, and everything web related just to name a few.
What I did to study: I took a little over a month and a half studying almost full time. I started with the Gibson book, read from start to finish in order to get a grasp of the scope of the exam. The book gave a good introduction for me, but alone was not enough. Reading it through and thinking you understand most of the concepts…then realizing how deceptively hard everything was came as a bit of a shock to me. This was me taking a few practice tests and coming to the realization.
I’m a bit of a resource hoarder so I used a ton. For additional books, I almost read through the Meyers one. All others I just skimmed or glanced at. I also pretty much took all the practice exams I could get my hands on. Hundreds of questions…
I’m not much of a note-taker so barely took any. I read other peoples notes though.
I regret not watching the Messer videos as initial foundation like most have (seems to be the norm around here) but I did read his notes and take his practice tests. I think I did high 70s-low 80s on the initial tests then came back later and got high 90s.
For Dion I listened to his lessens on audio on the go. I also took the 6 Dion tests. I took 4 early on and was scoring again high 70s-low 80s. Retakes on those 4 were in the 90s. The last two I took only once and very near to the day of the test, and got 85 and 86.
I have a better attention span for reading than for watching videos.
I also went through the entire chapple and lachance practice question book twice. Both early on and right near the end. I feel this one is underrated. I used a bit of CyberVista and Skillsoft learning and some Shannon videos.
On YouTube I watched ‘inside cloud and security’ for another run through. And also some ‘cyberkraft’ for PBQs. I even used chat openai which is pretty fun.
Really, my learning was all over the place and I became a hoarder of practice tests. For instance I used security+ app (globe), pocket prep app, and learnzap app. All good in their own ways for closing the gaps.
There were some random other tests I found scattered around the internet. Really…it was all over the place, it was hard for me not having any IT background. I felt I had to learn a lot of stuff from the ground up (or more like skipping a few steps then up) that most wouldn’t need. So for advice, I don’t think one would need to take as many practice exams as I did, or even use half as many resources. If you are new to IT, I recommend the variety.
What the actual test was like: Really..it was a mixed bag. Some questions were shockingly simple. Many more wordy, but straightforward with a clear answer. Some so ambiguous and confusing with the selection of choices they give you. And they might randomly hit you with something you’ve never seen before despite everything. Although those weren’t that common.
The pbqs…I just didn’t like half of them. Felt they were ambiguous in many areas kind of like the complaints I get from ExamCompass pbqs. Just reading Sec+ material and looking at mc questions will only prepare you for about half of them. You’ll probably do much better with more background in IT. Perhaps if you do sec+ practice labs it would help a lot more.
In the end I think what saved me was the huge amount of questions I took and the diversity of the wording each source had. It’s like looking at the same thing from a myriad of angles. You take enough, you will learn to recognize patterns or gain ‘impressions’ despite not knowing everything there is to learn on a particular topic.

Hey what's up, It's me, the curious mf with a trillion questions. I was wondering how many gems I'd have to let go if I want to unlock a mythic from 0 cells to 100.
Sorry for the frequent questions, I just love the game so much. Too bad everything is expensive as hell.

I apologize in advance for the length of my rant, and if I am somewhat rambling. I just really need to let this out and have no one to talk to.
I am a 34(f) from Canada. I have really been struggling for several years. I am a very independent person, and have lived on my own since I was 16. I have always had 2-3 jobs, and thrived on it. My mom and my entire family really other than my dad, are severe alcoholics, and I made the decision to leave at 16 and pretty much cut contact unless they could someday choose me over the booze. That never happened. Before this "rough period" I felt like I had gotten away, broke the curse and made something of myself. I was succesful and happy. Working 2 jobs, a long term partner, our own house.. life was good. But it all went to shit. It started in 2017 when I found out I had endometrioid adenocarcinoma (uterine cancer), which thankfully we caught quick and was very treatable. After that whole ordeal, I was back to work for less than one month before a woman who was texting and driving ran a red light and T-boned me on the driver's side door as I was driving through my green light. More hospitals, more therapies and more missed work. Once I was back to work for about 2 months this time, covid hit and I was laid off from one job and fired from the other. I was considered high risk due to my immune system being shot from my cancer treatments, so my doctor told me I couldn't work and to isolate anyways. Once lockdowns ended and things got somewhat back to normal, I found a new job. A great job actually that I was really excited about and love. I have been there now over a year and a half, and was trying my hardest to dig myself out of my immense hole of debt.
I didn't have benefits before this job, so although the major stuff during the cancer and the accident like the surgeries, the chemo, the radiation etc. was all covered a lot of stuff was not. I had to pay for very expensive perscriptions, therapies, physio etc. on top of not having any income for just over 2 years altogether between the cancer and car accident. I blew through my savings within about six months, and then took out multiple credit cards and lines of credit. At first, I really wasn't that worried. In my head, I just thought like.. I need to do what I have to do to survive right now, and once I am healthy again I will just work my ass off for a couple years to pay all this off. Then covid hit, and after I was fired, I really started to worry. I somehow limped through and came out the other side and then got this job that I have now, that I mentioned before. The new problem now is that once again I am having major health issues. I have been on sick leave since October. Thankfully, this time I have insurance at this job, unlike the previous times, so I am still have some sort of income even though it's very minimal. I have been in and out of the hospital for months with internal bleeding, stomach ulcers, anemia, extreme fatigue, severe stomach pains, and nausea. Everything here in Healthcare is so backed up right now from covid times that it is taken forever to get anything done. I am going for my 2nd endoscopy/colonoscopy on June 15th with the internal medicine specialist/ gastroenterolgist that I was referred to ages ago and its finally happening. The first one didn't work because there was some sort of blockage they couldn't get by. So hopefully I will have concrete answers soon. But in the meantime it's been a mess. MRIs, CT scans, ultrasounds, iron transfusions, blood transfusions, blood work every week, barium enemas and on and on. My mom has colon cancer, and her father died from colon cancer, along with several other family members.. so I am very nervous.
I am not exaggerating when I say I lost everything over the past few years. My partner of 8 years broke up with me during the cancer ordeal because he was worried I wouldn't be able to have kids. We actually found out I had cancer in the first place because we were trying to get pregnant, I didn't have my period for 4 months and we thought I was pregnant forsure but the tests kept saying negative. So we went to my gyno, all excited and happy... and left with horrible news instead. During those 6 years I also lost my house, my perfect credit, my nice brand new vehicle, a lot of friends, and more. Once I had gotten this new job I thought like.. finally.. a break. I will get back on track this time. And now with this new round of health issues, I just feel like giving up. I have always tried to be positive no matter what. But this time, it's feeling impossible. Life is just so hard when you have no safety net or someone to fall back on isn't it? I never realized before how much I took my health and ability to work for granted. Now, I am alone, bed ridden, worried about being evicted from my crappy one bedroom apartment with no where to go and no one to talk to. I am behind on my rent, my phone and internet is about to be cut off.. the 60% of my wages I am getting from sick leave doesn't make it really far and I'm just limping along here. I also used to bartend on the side which was a huge help to my monthly income and I haven't been able to do that for months either.
Anyways. That was a lot lol and I apologize. It's just been eating me up and I needed to get it out somehow. There are a lot of safety nets in canada, but it seems like since I have a job on paper although unable to work, I don't qualify for many. If anyone has any idea's i would really appreicate it!! Being bed ridden is not good for someone who likes to be active. All you can do is sit here and think think think.
If you've made it this far, thank you and I hope you have a great day! Xo

Hi Reddit so this is my second post so l'm sorry if the structure is off or if this is in some way incoherent, English is not my first language.
I'm female 25 and my best friend since high school, male 24, is going through something with his current bf, 24-25 male, and I have no idea how to help.
Ever since we were in high school I guess you could call my friend a player or womanizer, he has absolutely no trouble pulling the cutest girl and despite this, he has had like 3 relationships each of which has lasted for many years. He is overall a great dude, he is like a brother to me and even though he is not everyones cup of tea I love him like a brother. After graduating high school he moved out of state to study medicine while I stayed home, we basically see each other maybe once or twice a month to hang out and he is always the one to come back, however this last few months he has been off.
Today we sat down and he told me he is for the first time in his life in a relationship with a guy, I have met the guy maybe twice. My friend is so in love, I have never seen him this infatuated with anyone, the way he spoke of him genuinely shocked me, however this guy is a real piece of work, from what my friend told me, he is constantly cheating on him, leaving him behind and basically using him as a doormat. My friend was very depressed talking about offing himself and telling me he had considered checking himself into a mental institution. This is all very concerning because number one, he has basically no support system where he lives, all his friends live here and he is feeling more alone than ever before, but also concerning is that he is a smart guy, he is aware of the way this guy is treating him, he knows it's wrong and he knows he is suffering more because of this guy but even though he is aware of all of this, he is in love, he can't help it, and it kills me to see him this hurt. We were watching a movie and he decided to check were his bf was and he saw his location on a guys house and he just started to cry telling me how he just knew he was cheating on him right then and there.
Now, I’m not very good at dealing with emotional stuff, I was telling him throughout all this how he deserves better and how important he was to me while hugging him and giving reassuring pets and stuff, I don’t know if I was too clingy but I just felt like I wasn’t helping at all. I know listening is very helpful but when he told me about his suicidal thoughts I felt very powerless, I don’t know how I can help him at all, I don’t know what to do to help. He is leaving back in a few days to where he lives and I’m so scared for him, I could really use some help here. I basically sent him a message after he left about how important he is to me and that I will do anything in my power to help but I feel like it’s not enough, if anyone has been through something similar I would greatly appreciate any form of advice
Thanks for reading till the end
TLDR my friend is in pain. How can I help him deal with this? What can I say to him to help him?

Venturing into uncharted territories can yield substantial gains in today’s globalized economy. It’s no secret that the United Arab Emirates (UAE) is a popular choice among companies and entrepreneurs looking for a stimulating and accommodating setting. Company incorporation and international debt collection are two crucial aspects to consider when setting up and running a business in the UAE. This blog will delve into these central issues and feature the top UAE-based services for streamlining business processes.
Best company incorporation services in UAE
The United Arab Emirates (UAE) has several legal and administrative hoops that must be jumped through to establish a business. If you want your company’s launch to go off without a hitch, using incorporation services is a good idea. Here are some highly recommended services to help you along the way:
Expert Consultation: Consultation with a company incorporation expert to discuss your business goals and get advice on the best legal structure and business organization.
Documentation and Licensing: Compliance with UAE regulations can be ensured with the help of these services, which aid in drafting legal documents like a Memorandum of Association, Articles of Association, and license applications.
Local Sponsorship: Company formation in the United Arab Emirates (UAE) requires local sponsorship from an Emirati resident. Using a reputable incorporation service will help you quickly set up your business by connecting you with reputable local sponsors or serving as sponsors themselves.
Opening a Corporate Bank Account: Efficient and the best company incorporation services in UAE make opening a corporate bank account possible, which is essential for conducting business.
International Debt Collection in UAE
Debt collection is one of many obstacles that must be overcome when taking a company globally. Take advantage of international debt collection services in the UAE to help you get past these obstacles. Learn more about how these services can help your company below.
Multilingual Debt Collection Specialists: Professionals in the UAE’s international debt collection services are typically bilingual or multilingual, facilitating smooth communication and productive negotiations with debtors from all walks of life.
Knowledge of Local Laws and Practices: Debt collection in various countries requires an intimate familiarity with the relevant local laws and practices. Professional debt collection services in the UAE understand how to deal with these nuances while staying within the bounds of the law.
Tailored Debt Recovery Strategies: Every International debt collection in the UAE case is unique. Trustworthy service providers in the UAE tailor their debt recovery strategies to your unique needs, increasing the likelihood of a successful outcome.
Global Network: Established international debt collection services have a global network of associates and partners, allowing them to pursue debtors in various jurisdictions and recover outstanding debts more efficiently.
Source: https://www.evernote.com/shard/s610/sh/77f365df-6193-d48f-5626-8d98644b2092/hccQF02etOkpbil63D7pvPfepexj6H88bHgmW9Egyi-J4s_wWd1iD7kZiA

So in 2018 I bought my 2007 4Runner 4WD V6 with 115,000 miles and I was in love. It felt so tight in every way and was such a upgrade (daily driver wise) from my ‘96 Tacoma and my ‘88 pickup. Fast forward five years and it’s still pretty clean, has 179,599 on it and is generally pretty healthy but I feel like we’ve lost our spark. I see my self looking at new 4Runners and thinking I might be happier with one of them on the other hand a car note sounds horrible especially with rates and the stupid market markups and part of me wants to see how many miles I can rack up on the 4th gen. How did you and your 4Runner get through this problem? Did you find ways to spice it up and end up happy again? Or did you dump her for someone younger and shiner?

I feel like playing with a lot of them, for fun or for trying if it still good or not. But I'm starting to reach the point where my vault is kinda full and I don't see many weapons to delete. I was trying old weapons, like the ones from before Origin Trait. With some of them I have some feelings - like my beloved Chroma Rush from where I started playing Destiny - it still shredding lol
But now we have craftable weapons - old and new. I didn't craft all of them, but it seems like old good crafted weapons are staying behind in quality (for exemple the weapons from Season of the Risen).
My point is: how to play with so many different and good weapons? (at least this seasonal craftable seems weak, overall).
I even thought to myself before Witch Queen "well, let's practice some detachment and delete ALL FREAKING VAULT except for one gun from each type". I didn't do it, but I still have the feeling of having way too many goodrolls but won't play with them because there's always a new toy, or a new weapon to level up, or even try the different new perks. Heck, now we even can hold some raid weapons to apply deepsight harnonizer!
How do you feel about it all? (I hope my exposition makes some sense).

You like computers and everyone tells you that you can make six figures in IT. So easy!
So how do you do it? Is your degree the right path? Can you just YouTube it? How do you get the experience when every job wants experience?
So many questions and this is the weekly post for them!
WIKI:

• /ITCareerQuestions Wiki
• /CSCareerQuestions Wiki
• /Sysadmin Wiki
• /Networking Wiki
• /NetSec Wiki
• /NetSecStudents Wiki
• /SecurityCareerAdvice/
• /CompTIA Wiki
• /Linux4Noobs Wiki

Essential Blogs for Early-Career Technology Workers:

• Krebs on Security: Thinking of a Cybersecurity Career? Read This
• "Entry Level" Cybersecurity Jobs are not Entry Level
• SecurityRamblings: Compendium of How to Break into Security Blogs
• RSA Conference 2018: David Brumley: How the Best Hackers Learn Their Craft
• CBT Nuggets: How to Prepare for a Capture the Flag Hacking Competition
• Packet Pushers: Does SDN Mean IT Will Be Able To Get Rid of Network People?

Above links sourced from: u/VA_Network_Nerd
MOD NOTE: This is a weekly post.

Cinnamon tea benefits

Cinnamon tea is considered one of the tastiest, sweet, and healthy tea. Cinnamon tea like other herbal teas has several health benefits. Cinnamon tea is made from cinnamon sticks. Usually, these sticks are used as natural sweeteners in other beverages, teas, and a few foods too.

How to make cinnamon tea?

You can make cinnamon tea in the comfort of your home. Cinnamon tea is also available in most supermarkets and online too. For more herbal teas and coffee look at Breweda. Take a few fresh cinnamon sticks. Make sure they are dry, and steep them in boiling water for 10 minutes and serve it hot. You can also add lemon for added flavor and health benefits. There is another way to prepare it, grind those into a fine powder and add one tablespoon of powder to one cup of tea in boiling water, steep it for ten minutes, and your cinnamon tea is ready.

Benefits of cinnamon tea

1. Fights oxidation

Cinnamon tea is rich in antioxidants which are considered to be beneficial compounds that keep us healthy. These anti-oxidants help fight oxidative damage caused by free radicals and stop cellular damage. Cinnamon is considered one of the spices that are rich in antioxidants which helps us protect ourselves from various diseases.

2. Reduces inflammation

Cinnamon tea also has anti-inflammatory properties, which help reduce inflammation in the body. It helps soothe muscles, and also prevents many diseases, as inflammation is the root cause of various diseases. It is also believed that cinnamon helps in reducing LDL which is considered as bad cholesterol thereby protecting the heart too. Cinnamon contains high amounts of natural coumarin compounds, which prevent the narrowing of blood vessels.

3. Reduces blood sugar levels

As mentioned earlier, cinnamon is a natural sweetening agent, and it doesn’t have side effects as regular sugar does. So replacing regular sugar with cinnamon can help you regulate blood sugar levels and can also keep diabetes at bay. This spice is considered to be having effects on insulin, the hormone that is responsible for regulating blood sugar levels in our body.

4. Fights bacteria and fungi

Cinnamon has the ability to fight bacteria and fungi. The main active compound in cinnamon called cinnamaldehyde helps prevent the growth of various bacteria, fungi, and molds.

5. Helps relieve menstrual pain

It is also believed that drinking cinnamon tea can help relieve menstrual pain. Cinnamon tea also has the ability to treat a few menstrual symptoms such as PMS (Premenstrual syndrome), and dysmenorrhea.
Read More

How do you think this is going to go sales wise? I'm hoping to make a decent amount of furniture sales to make up for my department not having a huge amount of sales lately.
I'll have one or two days of great sales in my department but any other time I'm not selling a whole lot. Speaking of sales, we haven't had very many things in furniture on sale lately or from what I've seen lately. I feel like multiple recliners used to go on sale a lot, same with sofas & loveseats. But now I'm lucky if maybe a recliner or two goes on sale and maybe a couple sofas at best. Mattresses go on sale frequently though.
I was speaking to a customer yesterday and they were surprised by how little of the furniture was on sale compared to what they used to see.
Meanwhile everything is on sale such as sodas, chips etc.

I know this isn't a good starter project, but I'm just curious if this is possible and how hard it would be for someone with a lot of hobby/diy experience:
There are many open-source LLMs that can be downloaded and self-hosted on a DIYers PC for use without the internet or sending your data to a company's server. I want to self-host an LLM on my home computer, and then use my computer as the brain for a small drone that follows me around and lets me query the LLM via voice.
The drone would be small, quiet, and would need to have sensors for following me around my property (maybe land if I stay in one place for a while). It would also have a mic and speaker, and would listen for a wake word like google home or alexa. Then it would record my prompt, send it to my computer for processing, and read out the LLM's response from my computer on the onboard speaker (so basically just sending short audio files back and forth).
Has anyone done this?

Hey fellas from this lovely community.
TL;DR let's go dark for a day to protest against reddit charging insane fees to 3rd party apps trying to bring free and slicker alternatives to reddit.com by offering us redditors neater apps.
I'm not sure how to reach out to mods but I think the crowd here is nice enough to support the cause and since I'm on this sub nearly every day for at least 10 minutes I feel like sharing.
There's an on-going campaign to go dark for a day on June 12 if I'm correct, in protest of Reddit increasing the price of API requests from 3rd party apps from free to an amount that would be as high as 20 millions USD per year for some to function.
It's not this community's prerogative but I reckon that our community is part of the beating heart of Reddit and shares the values of people fighting for that cause.
Many devs here I came to know of by this sub would've never reached such an audience without reddit, many youtubers and other content creators as well and us as an audience shouldn't have to pay to get content in a neater way.
I'm not using Narwhal, Reddit is Fun or Apollo, but it looks like these alternative modes of consumption of Reddit are being silenced by money.
Making 3rd party apps pay these crazy fees to request the API will eventually lead to Reddit mobile App supremacy because us the audience will eventually have to bear a trickled down cost of API consumption.
Please upvote if you are in favor so we can join the protest.
https://old.reddit.com/ModCoord/comments/1401qw5/incomplete_and_growing_list_of_participating/
​
EDIT: I used bros without gender limiting, I don't know how people from this community identify but know that my choice of words is not limitative.

I know that we are supposed to be forever but I kinda hate you I try not to I try to give you Grace but how many mistakes am I supposed to let slip? We are years in and you never say the right thing and you always look so confused I hate having to simplify myself so I am easier for you to swallow I don’t wanna have to explain the most basic shit I hate you for the situation because no matter what it’s your fault this didn’t come out of no where it came from your bad decisions and now I am all by myself with our responsibilities and tbh the hardest part is not blaming you. I don’t know how we got here I feel lied to like you put on this mask to sooth me during arguments but then we are right back to the same conversations and honestly I don’t know how to stop the cycle I am don’t hate being alone I hate being told you have my back and every step of the way you prove otherwise

This post will probably be long and messy because it's just a lot of things I've wanted to get out for a while.
I met my fiancé when we were 14, we've now been together for 11 years and have a daughter together. We are textbook definition high school sweethearts. He is a perfect partner and I truly mean that. I got along with his family from day dot. They were so welcoming and kind to me. I used to go over every Wednesday for dinner after school - they would always alter their dinners to be vegetarian for me - and most Friday's for takeaway night - always their shout. I got along with his Mum the best. Whenever we would go over there for dinner after my fiancé and I moved out together, my fiancé would hang out with his two brothers and I would hang out with his Mum. Chatting about anything and everything. She truly was a second mum to me.
God, I can't even pin point when the brainwashing started. It started with leaning toward natural remedies and healthy eating, I think? You know the harmless - Cook with coconut oil instead of olive oil, vitamin D can improve mental health etc. Harmless and true, with a grain of salt, things that just seemed like she was sharing them because she cared about and loved us.
Like many people, things spiralled when COVID-19 hit. We are in Australia so we were incredibly lucky that we weren't as devastated as many other countries. It started at our usual weekly dinners talking about how awful the lockdowns were, how it sucked wearing a mask etc. I would agree but more on the basis that it sucks wearing a mask and I miss going to the pub - not that I thought the government was taking over. It slowly seemed to spiral into other conspiracies. The light hearted natural remedy chats warped into rants of chemtrails and governments poisoning our food. I'm not confrontational so usually I would just smile and nod not really reciprocating conversation. Fiancé's relationship with his father deteriorated around this time for numerous reasons - partially conspiracy bullshit, partially childhood issues.
Then I got pregnant. We were of course COVID, flu & dTAP vaccinated, none of his family were (Dad, Mum or 2 brothers). As the pregnancy progressed it was hanging over my fiancé and I of... what would we do when baby was born because we had been advised to not let unvaccinated people around baby and being someone with bad genetic asthma - this was not something to compromise on. My heart was breaking for my fiancé as every time we lightly discussed the topic, it's like neither of us wanted to say 'they can't meet baby for THREE WHOLE MONTHS'. But, I think we both thought/hoped that once discussed with his Mum, she would be willing to get the vaccines in order to meet her first grandchild. Fiancé's Dad was out the picture at this point so his stance was irrelevant to us but fiancé and his Mum and really close so I know it meant A LOT to him. Fiancé decided to have the conversation with her while I was working as we decided it wasn't my place to be involved in the discussion. At work, I got a message from my partner saying she broke down crying but in the end - wasn't willing to compromise. Baby was born in October and she has since met her, come over a handful of times with her mum (fiancé's nana) and comes to every second swim class (about 5 in total). But that's all the involvement from his family. His brother's (who he was once REALLY close with prior to cutting Dad out the picture), haven't even contacted us to ask about her let alone wanting to meet her, Dad hasn't reached out - but no shock there. Dad has told his entire side of the family that we have 'cut them off' because they won't get vaccinated - which is a lie.
Since then, MIL is continuing to spiral. She follows tonnes of hateful pro-Trump/pro-republican Instagram pages (keep in mind that we are Australian...), she goes down rabbit holes of all celebrities being paedophiles and most recently has been sending us videos of Barbara O'Neill talking about how putting Cayenne pepper in your socks to increase blood flow an using it as a blood thinning medication substitute(?!?!?!). I, to the most of my ability being a pushover people pleaser, snapped. I told her that I don't take anything that woman says seriously after the misinformation she spread about infant nutrition and that she put babies at risk - she sent laughing emojis and said she loves her. I wanted to keep it polite for my fiancé's sake, so I just said that I think she's 'a danger to the community' and 'let's leave it at that', she went on a rant about the government bribing doctors and big pharma bullshit. I reiterated that we would agree to disagree. I feel like this has been the straw that broke the camels back. I won't ever trust her to watch our daughter. I can't even imagine how uncomfortable our next conversation will be.
I am so angry and bitter and fucking heartbroken. My partner is the most incredible man, loving father and god damn beautiful person and his brothers have let him down, his dad is useless and his mum is disappearing down the rabbit hole right in front of us and there is nothing we can do.
To be honest, I think I just needed to get this all out because I don't know what to do. I support my partner as best I can but that mostly just means not talking about it. If you're still reading, thanks for listening to my rambling.

I feel bad even thinking that, but it’s true. In just under a month, I’ve come to realize just how much stress she actually brings me, and how much trauma I’m constantly reliving because of her actions. Not only that, but I think having been in jail may have actually been somewhat helpful to her mental state.
I won’t get into all of the details, but a short history of our relationship is as follows:
She started using meth quite regularly years before I was born, and although she stayed sober while pregnant, it colors our relationship to this day. At age 6 she was charged with the neglect and abuse, of my brother and I. We would from that moment on, live with her mom (my grandma). At age 8 she came to grandma’s house and threatened to kill her, and kidnap my brother and I. She’d be arrested, but no charges were brought against her. From then until age 12 we’d see her sporadically for supervised visits, many of which she didn’t attend. When I turned 14 she started suffering from meth psychosis , one of the main symptoms of long term meth use. Because she was less grounded in reality, she was much more dangerous to be around. While she had never actually attacked, only threatened to do so, in the past, she became much more ready to fight anyone, including Grandma, my brother and I. For safety reasons, a protection order was granted, and we cut all contact with her. I still have nightmares about some of the things she threatened to do to me. When I was 16 (2020) I got a call from CPS stating that my little sister had been found with my mom in the middle of the road, starving and surrounded by needles. Up until that point, I didn’t know I had a sister. She was 2 weeks old then. I was given temporary guardianship over her, and eventually, my aunt would legally adopt her. I ended up missing a lot of school to get my sister to doctors appointments, court hearings and CPS visits. I very nearly dropped out if I’m being honest.
Now I’m 19, and in college, although; I’m home for the summer. Twice now, she’s shown up at our house unannounced, with a stolen car. The first time, it took police 5 hours to get to the house and arrest her. While she wasn’t acting violently, she wasn’t all there, and was yelling at me for killing her daughter (I think she was referring to my sister) and stealing something to the tune of $800,000 from her. When police finally arrived, meth was discovered on her person, and it was revealed that she was driving a stolen car without a license.
She spent a little less than a month in jail, during which I called her somewhat regularly. For the first time in my life, I knew where she was, and that she had a roof over her head, and food. She was given medication to help manage the hallucinations, and overall, seemed ok She very much was not happy, but she was the safest she had been in a long time.
Today she appeared at the house again. She spent some moments in reality, and others very much not so. She switched from yelling at invisible voices, to yelling at me for pimping her out, stealing money or killing/selling into sexual slavery my sister, to telling me she loves and misses me. It was frankly exhausting. When I called the police, I was informed that they would not be coming again. She had hitchhiked, so there was no stolen car, she was threatening me, and apparently my restraining order had expired when she was in jail. No crimes had been committed.
It took a long time, but eventually we convinced her to go back to the city. My brother and I drove her to the nearest train station and bought her a ticket. She asked that we print out a picture of my brother, my sister and I, before she left, which we obliged. It breaks my heart to send her down there knowing she has nowhere to go, but I don’t know what else to do. We’ve put her through rehab multiple times, grandma used to pay her rent so she wouldn’t be homeless so long as she stayed of meth, we’ve all offered her jobs, and to pay for therapy. Nothing has worked.
If she were in the right mind, she wouldn’t be a danger to us. We are no longer reliant on her. I know that she loves my brother and I and her whole family, but she’s at the point where she’s absolutely convinced that we’re out to get her, and that she must retaliate with any means available to her.
At least when she was in jail, I could still contact her safely. She was detoxing, and more often than not grounded in reality.I could hold a full conversation with her for the first time in years. I knew she was being fed, and that she was at least somewhat safe. It feels mean, but I really just wish that she would just stay in jail.

Application development world, one decision that holds profound implications for your project's success is the selection of an appropriate database. This choice is far from trivial. It directly impacts not only the performance of your application, delivering a smooth or laggy user experience, but also its scalability, determining whether your application can grow in stride with your user base or customer demand. Additionally, your database choice also influences the ease or complexity of managing your application, affecting how swiftly you can respond to issues and implement changes or improvements.
In the diverse landscape of database solutions, two names often rise to the forefront of discussions - Redis and MongoDB. These popular options each bring a distinctive set of features and advantages to the table, suiting them to different scenarios and requirements. As a result, they are frequently contrasted and compared, with developers seeking to discern which would be the ideal fit for their specific project needs.
Redis, standing for Remote Dictionary Server, is an open-source, in-memory data structure store. It can function as a database, cache, and message broker. The design of this key-value store results in lightning-fast read and write operations. This quality makes Redis a prime candidate for applications that necessitate real-time data processing.
On the other hand, MongoDB is a document-oriented database known for its flexibility and scalability. It is also open-source and employs JSON-like documents with optional schemas. These attributes make MongoDB a powerful tool for querying and indexing, further enriching its appeal.
Both Redis and MongoDB, with their unique strengths and characteristics, have carved niches for themselves in certain types of applications. However, the choice between them is not always clear-cut and can be influenced by a multitude of factors such as the nature of data to be stored, speed requirements, scalability needs, and more.
The goal of this comprehensive article is to illuminate the key facets of Redis vs MongoDB. By contrasting their features, strengths, and weaknesses, we aim to equip you with the necessary understanding to navigate this critical decision confidently. Through this guidance, we hope to steer you towards the right choice for your project, optimizing the performance, scalability, and manageability of your application.

What is Redis?

Redis, an acronym for Remote Dictionary Server, is an open-source, in-memory data structure store used as a database, cache, and message broker.
At the heart of our comparison lies Redis. An acronym that stands for Remote Dictionary Server, Redis is a potent and versatile solution in the data management space. It is an open-source tool, meaning that its source code is freely available, promoting transparency, community-driven enhancements, and adaptability to specific needs. The free availability of its source code aligns with the ethos of many developers, supporting the continued development and refinement of this high-performing software.
Redis operates as an in-memory data structure store, which significantly impacts its performance characteristics. The term 'in-memory' signifies that Redis stores data directly in the server's main memory (RAM), unlike other databases that store data on disk. This characteristic provides Redis with a substantial speed advantage, as accessing data in memory is considerably faster than retrieving it from a disk. As a result, applications using Redis can access and manipulate data with blazing speed, propelling their performance.
The versatility of Redis goes beyond just functioning as a database. It can also serve as a cache and message broker. As a cache, Redis temporarily stores frequently accessed data to reduce the time taken for data retrieval, resulting in faster response times. As a message broker, Redis supports the publishing of messages and subscribing to channels, facilitating efficient and real-time communication between different parts of an application.
Redis adopts a straightforward and effective key-value store design, allowing data to be stored as a pair where one element is a key, and the other is its corresponding value. This architecture is simple yet powerful, enabling high-speed read and write operations. Keys provide a method to identify data, and values hold the actual data itself. Due to this design, Redis excels in applications requiring real-time data processing where speed is of the essence.
Overall, the nature of Redis - its open-source status, its in-memory operation, its versatile roles, and its key-value store design - makes it an outstanding choice for certain types of applications. Especially in scenarios where real-time data processing is vital, Redis can offer a performance that truly sets it apart.
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The Benefits of Redis: Speed, Flexibility, and More

Redis, as we've discovered, is much more than a simple data store. Its unique characteristics endow it with certain strengths that make it a robust tool in a developer's arsenal. The benefits of Redis are many, but two in particular stand out: its remarkable speed and its support for a range of diverse data structures.
Redis owes its blazing speed to its in-memory design. As data is stored and accessed directly from the main memory (RAM), data operations like read and write occur at a rapid pace. With Redis, you can achieve sub-millisecond latency, a speed that is often essential in today's dynamic and fast-paced applications. This speed advantage places Redis in a class of its own when it comes to applications that require real-time responses.
In practical terms, this means that Redis is an ideal solution for numerous demanding use-cases. For instance, as a cache, Redis can store frequently accessed data for speedy retrieval, effectively reducing application response times. It also shines in session management, where maintaining a fast, consistent experience for users across multiple sessions is crucial.
The application of Redis doesn't stop there. In real-time analytics, where data needs to be processed and insights need to be drawn instantly, Redis proves to be a valuable asset. Additionally, it is an excellent fit for message queuing systems, where its ability to quickly publish and retrieve messages ensures efficient and reliable communication between different application components.
Complementing its speed is another significant strength of Redis: its support for a wide array of data structures. Redis is not just a simple key-value store; it can handle data structures such as lists, sets, sorted sets, hashes, bitmaps, hyperloglogs, and geospatial indexes. Each of these data structures serves a unique purpose, and having the ability to choose the right one for the right task can be instrumental in building efficient applications.
This diversity in data structures offers a high degree of flexibility in handling different data types and use cases. For example, lists in Redis can be used to implement stacks, queues, or even a timeline of activities; sorted sets can be used to manage a leaderboard in a gaming application; and geospatial indexes can be used in location-based services like finding the nearest restaurant.
The pros of Redis lie in its exceptional speed and its support for various data structures. These advantages make Redis a compelling choice for a range of applications, from those requiring real-time data processing to those requiring diverse methods of data handling.

Cons of Redis

While Redis is indeed a powerful tool with a multitude of strengths, it is not without its limitations. Understanding these constraints is critical to making an informed decision about whether Redis is the right choice for your application's needs. The two primary limitations of Redis relate to its data persistence model and its relatively simple querying capabilities.
The first limitation revolves around Redis' data persistence model. As previously discussed, Redis is fundamentally an in-memory data store, meaning data is primarily stored in the server's main memory (RAM). While this design leads to fast data access and superior performance, it also means that data stored in Redis may not persist if the server is rebooted or encounters a failure.
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Although Redis does offer mechanisms to mitigate this concern, such as snapshotting and append-only files (AOF) that allow data to be persisted to disk, these methods come with their own trade-offs in terms of performance and disk space. As a result, Redis may not be the best choice for scenarios where long-term, reliable data storage is paramount. Applications requiring a strong guarantee of data durability may need to consider alternative solutions or additional backup strategies.
The second limitation of Redis pertains to its querying capabilities. At its core, Redis operates as a key-value store, where data can be quickly accessed using a unique key. While this design works well for simple data access patterns and contributes to Redis' impressive speed, it may fall short in scenarios requiring more complex data manipulation.
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Unlike databases that support SQL or similar querying languages, Redis lacks advanced querying capabilities. You cannot, for instance, easily perform operations like selecting all keys that meet a certain condition or joining data from multiple keys. As a result, Redis may be less suited to scenarios that demand intricate data analysis, complex searches, or advanced data manipulation.
In essence, while Redis is a high-performance in-memory data store that supports a range of data structures, it is not a one-size-fits-all solution. The limitations concerning data persistence and querying capabilities should be carefully considered alongside its strengths. The right decision always depends on your specific use case, requirements, and constraints. As with any technology decision, the goal is to choose the best tool for the task at hand.
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What is MongoDB ?

MongoDB is an open-source, document-oriented database, meaning it stores data in a semi-structured format similar to JSON (JavaScript Object Notation), known as BSON (Binary JSON).
Like Redis, being open-source, MongoDB's source code is freely accessible, fostering a culture of innovation, transparency, and community-backed improvements.
One of MongoDB's most significant selling points is its use of JSON-like documents with optional schemas. This design choice marks a stark departure from traditional relational databases that employ structured tables and rows for data storage. In MongoDB, data is stored and organized in documents, which can contain multiple fields and data types, offering a great deal more flexibility. These fields can vary from document to document, and there's no obligation to have a predefined schema. This lack of rigidity allows developers to adapt the database structure as the application requirements evolve, making MongoDB an excellent choice for projects where the data schema might change over time.
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Another standout characteristic of MongoDB is its high scalability. As businesses grow and applications generate more data, the ability of a database to scale becomes paramount. MongoDB shines in this regard, providing features like automatic sharding and replication to handle vast amounts of data and distribute it across multiple servers. Sharding allows MongoDB to distribute data across several machines, efficiently managing large data sets. Replication, on the other hand, ensures data availability and durability by maintaining multiple copies of data across different database servers.
Beyond flexibility and scalability, MongoDB also boasts powerful querying and indexing capabilities. Unlike Redis, which primarily operates as a key-value store, MongoDB provides a rich query language that allows developers to perform complex read and write operations. Whether it's filtering data based on specific criteria, joining data across collections, or performing aggregate functions, MongoDB's querying language has got you covered.
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Furthermore, MongoDB supports a variety of indexes, making data retrieval even faster. Developers can create indexes on any field within a MongoDB document, including fields within arrays, improving performance and efficiency.
MongoDB, with its open-source nature, document-oriented structure, flexible schema, high scalability, and robust querying and indexing capabilities, stands out as a potent solution for a wide array of applications. It is particularly fitting for scenarios where data schemas are flexible, large volumes of data are expected, or where complex querying and indexing are required.

The Benefits of MongoDB: Flexibility, Scalability, and Reliability

MongoDB, a favored choice among many developers and businesses alike, is characterized by a multitude of strengths. These strengths revolve around MongoDB's flexibility, rich querying capabilities, scalability, and ACID-compliant transactions, all of which contribute to its suitability for handling complex data structures, big data applications, and business-critical operations.
First and foremost, the flexibility that MongoDB offers is significant. MongoDB does not impose a rigid schema on your data, a departure from traditional SQL databases. This schema-less nature means you can store documents of varying structures within the same collection, allowing you to handle data that is inconsistent or evolving. You can add, remove, or modify fields as you go, which is particularly useful in applications where the data structure might change over time.
This flexibility extends to MongoDB's powerful querying capabilities. MongoDB provides a rich query language that supports a wide range of operations, allowing developers to perform complex tasks that go far beyond simple data retrieval. Whether you're filtering documents based on specific criteria, joining data across multiple collections, or performing aggregation functions, MongoDB offers the capabilities you need. This makes it especially suitable for handling complex data structures and requirements.
Next, MongoDB's strength lies in its scalability. It is designed to accommodate big data applications and scale horizontally through a process called sharding. Sharding is the practice of distributing data across multiple servers or clusters, which can enhance performance, manage large data sets efficiently, and ensure that your application can grow without being constrained by your database's capacity.
If you're handling big data or expecting high growth rates, MongoDB's sharding capabilities can help maintain high performance and prevent the database from becoming a bottleneck. This makes MongoDB a preferred choice for big data applications where scalability is a key requirement.
Finally, MongoDB is ACID-compliant, supporting Atomicity, Consistency, Isolation, and Durability (ACID) transactions. This compliance ensures that all database transactions are processed reliably and that your data remains consistent even in the event of a system failure. ACID compliance is a crucial factor for many business-critical applications where data integrity and reliability cannot be compromised.
In essence, MongoDB's flexibility, rich querying capabilities, scalability, and ACID-compliant transactions make it a robust, versatile, and reliable choice for a variety of applications. Whether you're handling complex and varying data structures, managing big data, or dealing with business-critical operations that require reliable data processing, MongoDB has the strengths to meet these challenges.

Cons of MongoDB: Memory Consumption and Data Redundancy

Like all technologies, MongoDB is not without its drawbacks. It's essential to understand these limitations to make an informed decision about whether it's the right database solution for a particular use case. Two notable limitations associated with MongoDB are its sizable memory footprint and potential for data redundancy and inconsistency due to its document-oriented design.
Firstly, MongoDB has a reputation for being relatively memory-intensive. As a document-oriented database that maintains a variety of indexes to facilitate quick data retrieval, MongoDB requires a substantial amount of memory. This is particularly true when dealing with large datasets, as MongoDB keeps frequently accessed data and indexes in RAM to boost performance. In resource-constrained environments, this can pose a challenge. If your application is running on a device or server with limited RAM, MongoDB's large memory footprint could lead to suboptimal performance or even outages.
Moreover, while MongoDB is highly performant and can handle big data with ease, it may not perform as well as some alternatives, like Redis, for in-memory data handling. Redis is specifically designed for in-memory operations, offering exceptional speed and performance. So, if your application requires real-time data processing and instant data access, Redis may outperform MongoDB.
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Secondly, while MongoDB's flexible, document-oriented approach is one of its biggest strengths, it can also lead to challenges. The lack of a predefined schema means that the same data can be represented in multiple ways across different documents. This flexibility, while advantageous in many scenarios, can lead to data redundancy if not managed correctly.
For instance, if the same piece of data is stored in multiple documents, any changes to that data must be updated across all instances, increasing the complexity of data management. If these updates aren't performed correctly, it can lead to data inconsistency issues. These challenges can be mitigated with careful database design and data management practices, but they nonetheless represent a trade-off of MongoDB's flexible, schema-less design.
While MongoDB is a powerful, flexible, and scalable database solution, these strengths come with trade-offs. The database's memory footprint and potential for data redundancy and inconsistency are important factors to consider when deciding if MongoDB is the right choice for your project. As always, the optimal database choice depends on your specific use-case, the resources at your disposal, and the constraints you're working under.

Redis vs MongoDB: Making the Right Choice

Embarking on the journey to select the right database for your application can feel like navigating a complex maze. Two potent contenders that often cross paths are Redis and MongoDB. Both have distinct strengths, and the ultimate decision largely hinges on your unique use case and specific requirements.
Redis can be your ally when your application demands lightning-fast data operations. Its in-memory nature and simplified data model provide unparalleled speed, offering sub-millisecond latency. If your application requires a robust caching system or real-time analytics, Redis shines bright as a choice. For instance, if you're building a chat application, a gaming leaderboard, or an ad-serving system where speed is critical, Redis can help you deliver an excellent user experience.
Furthermore, Redis is also an excellent fit for storing session information and user profiles. Many applications need quick access to user data for authentication and personalization, and the blazing-fast read and write operations that Redis provides can make these tasks significantly more efficient. The data structures that Redis supports, such as lists, sets, and hashes, can accommodate these scenarios well, further underlining why Redis could be the right choice for such requirements.
MongoDB comes into the picture when your application requires the handling of complex querying, high scalability, and flexibility in dealing with diverse and evolving data structures. MongoDB's document-oriented design and rich query language make it a powerful tool for applications that need to process complex data and perform sophisticated queries. It's ideally suited for projects like content management systems, mobile applications, and real-time analytics that require flexibility and robustness.
MongoDB's ability to scale horizontally through sharding makes it a reliable ally for applications expecting high data growth. As your application expands and the data multiplies, MongoDB's sharding capabilities ensure that your database doesn't become a performance bottleneck.
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While comparing Redis vs MongoDB, it's crucial to remember that choosing a database isn't always a binary decision. The realm of application development is replete with examples of successful applications that employ a polyglot persistence architecture, effectively leveraging the strengths of multiple databases. For instance, you could choose MongoDB for storing business data that requires complex querying and flexibility, while simultaneously employing Redis for caching and session storage to capitalize on its speed. This approach allows you to bring together the best of both worlds, thereby enhancing the performance and efficiency of your application.
The journey to choose between Redis vs MongoDB should be guided by a thorough understanding of your application's requirements and the unique strengths of each database. By aligning these elements, you can make a well-informed decision that propels your application towards success.
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Conclusion

Arriving at the juncture of decision-making, the path you tread in choosing the right database is laden with significance. This decision can profoundly impact multiple facets of your application, including its performance, scalability, efficiency, and long-term viability. The choice between Redis and MongoDB is no exception and warrants a thorough understanding of your application's needs, paired with the unique strengths each database brings to the table.
When it comes to database selection, the key is to immerse yourself in understanding your application's unique needs and demands. Does your application need to handle real-time analytics, where speed is paramount? Or perhaps you're developing a content management system that requires complex querying and a flexible data structure? Each use case presents unique needs that can be met more effectively by one database over the other.
Understanding the strengths of Redis and MongoDB is equally important in this equation. Redis, with its in-memory design and blazing-fast read and write operations, shines in situations demanding high-speed data operations, caching, and real-time analytics. Simultaneously, MongoDB, with its flexibility, rich querying language, and high scalability, proves to be a robust choice for applications dealing with diverse, evolving data structures, and expecting high data growth.
Once you've identified your application's needs and understood how each database can address these requirements, you're well-equipped to make an informed choice. This process may be intricate, but it's crucial to remember that it's not a race, but a journey. The goal is not to rush to a decision, but to carefully consider all the factors involved.
Remember, technology choices, like selecting a database, are not static, and you may need to reassess your decision as your application evolves and grows. By staying adaptable, continuously learning, and keeping the focus on your application's needs, the task of choosing the right database becomes less daunting and more of an enriching journey.
In conclusion, whether you choose Redis, MongoDB, or a combination of both, the objective is to align the database's strengths with your application's needs. This informed and balanced approach will ensure your application's robust performance and scalability, positioning it for long-term success. This may seem like a complex puzzle, but with a clear understanding of your application's needs and the strengths of each database, you're well on your way to solving it.
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I’m a 20yo male
i grew up with siblings, mothefather my parents were split when i was born but i’d see my dad every weekend, we grew up in housing commission which is government housing for poor people. i grew up eating bake beans and toast for dinner, sleeping on the floor next to cockroaches and rats. my mother and farther were both drug addicts who would replace their habits instead of getting us food. i was 6yo when one weekend i went to my dads & he sexually assaulted me, i vividly remember the car ride home telling my mother while she burst into tears saying how sorry she was that she wasn’t doing her job right. my farther went to court but got away with everything since then i lost all contact and was removed from seeing him. a few years past and my mum was still addicted to drugs, one day she took to many pills and sadly passed in her sleep 1 night and i was 12yo and keep in mind i was a mummy’s boy and we still slept in the same bed. i went to bed that night not knowing she had passed and i awoke to see her pale cold blue face and stiff body. i immediately knew what was wrong and i felt distraught and sick and i tried shaking and waking her up but i couldn’t. the memory plays in my head all the time. i moved in with my mums mum after that since she took me in but sadly a year later she passed from cardiac arrest and i seen it happen, i was 13 just starting high school i then got taken under guardianship from my auntie but she also abused drugs and abused me when i’d do bad. i started high school and never went because i didn’t have too, 1 day i went and got suspended from school and i was so horrified and scared to go home because of the consequences of getting beaten i went to the local pay phone and dialled the police and told them what she was doing and how she was doing drugs and abusing me. i got removed from my auntie and got placed with my older sister, she was only 17 at the time. she put me into a different school and tried getting my grades back on track but i couldn’t keep up with school with so much mental illness going on. i was kept quiet and kept to myself and cried when no one was around i tried taking my life when i was 16 and failed. i took 22 xanax from my sister and she found me having a seizure in my room, she called the hospital in time to come save me and here i am after the failed attempt my sister kicked me out because she thought she wasn’t doing a good job by me because of what i did. i moved into a refuge house filled with other teens that have gone through similar situations but i found a job and a place to stay now but the moral of the story is that please seek advice even if it’s something little. you’ll crack one day you just don’t see it yet… it still hasn’t been the same since my mother passed, i don’t celebrate birthdays or anything it just doesn’t sit right with me and i promise you guys reading this men/women fake smile all the time but there’s always something wrong pls seek help.