First Chapter
Chapter Fifteen
“Thank you, Ms. President, and Mr. Secretary-General. It’s my privilege to come and speak to everyone present during such a momentous time in human history. One which, I hope, will lead to a brighter future for us all…”
US President Correa’s boilerplate beginning flowed out as she scanned the room. Behind her rostrum sat a larger dais tiled with green marble, behind which sat the UN President, Secretary-General, and Under-Secretary-General. Two huge screens flanked the dais, and those screens now showed Correa’s face as she continued.
“…and we are committed to our country’s pledge to finding a peaceful and just way for Coalition technology to be incorporated worldwide, and to not attempt any reverse-engineering of our own. Make no mistake; we do not do this out of any sense of altruism or fairness, as pleasant as that may sound. We will hold this pledge sacred for the simple reason that, if the United States were to attempt such efforts the rest of the world would, without a doubt, find out. That, of course, would lead to a great instability.”
‘Great instability’ was diplomatic-speak for ‘the rest of the world then gangs up on the USA and then everything goes to hell’.
“I know there has already been a great deal of debate in this august hall as to the best way to proceed forward, in a fair and impartial manner. We believe that we have found what one might call a ‘trial run’ which will allow us to work out such matters.”
The general murmuring from the many semi-circular rows of desks in front of her increased.
“To begin with, during the first weeks after first contact we wanted to make sure our guests from the Coalition would not starve to death. Much like humanity’s own ships during the Age of Sail, Coalition exploration vessels store enough provisions for years…but such provisions never last. They have very advanced recycling, but mostly for water and even that is only a stop-gap measure. It is unknown even at this time as to how long it will take to repair the Exultant Finger of Rithro, and we did not want to risk the crew running out of food.
“Therefore, we undertook an emergency effort to have their ship’s medic examine various Earth foods to determine their compatibility with our guests’ varied biochemistries. I am pleased to report that there are quite a few Earth foodstuffs which are indeed compatible, although there are some specific items which act as allergens amongst some of the Coalition species. During these efforts, we did learn a bit about how their alien biochemistries work…information which has been duly published and is now openly available. We also began to get glimpses of something wonderful, and asked the Coalition crew for more details. They supplied us with some general ideas of what their medical technology can accomplish; I must emphasize that we do not possess any knowledge of how they can perform such miracles.”
Now the murmuring got quite a bit higher, but not quite to the point where they’d have to call for order.
“Yes, I use the word ‘miracles’ advisedly. For example, take Captain Sadaf. You have all seen her, and how she moves like a person in the prime of their life. Now. What if I told you that she is a little over four hundred years old?”
The murmuring died down into a shocked silence.
“Her species, the auhn, is no more long-lived than we are…but they are able to regenerate and remove the effects of aging. I hope the esteemed ambassadors can see what I am driving at. I propose that we set up a research institute, international in scope, to be placed at a neutral location which is still to be determined. The purpose of that institute will be to study and adapt Coalition medical technology for use in humans.”
Now the murmuring started again; she hoped they were actually listening instead of hatching side-deals with each other.
“You all have families and friends. I’m sure you have at least one family member, one good friend, who died of some horrible and unnecessary affliction. Think of what this means to the world, to us. It is also an excellent way to determine the inevitable issues and frictions which will arise from such a concerted international effort, and that, in turn, will inform our efforts in mutual reverse-engineering of other Coalition technology.
“I know this is, in many ways, a frightening time. Change can be frightening. But I am convinced that you will all know the right way forward, and that you will all see the need for us to unite in this matter, even if others may not be so clear-cut. I thank you for the opportunity to speak.”
As she stepped away from the rostrum, the UN President cleared his throat.
“We will now begin the debate on Madame President Correa’s proposal. Paper copies, with specifics of the proposal, are now being distributed to you all. We’ll now begin the debate period…yes, the gentleman from Portugal…?”
__________
Correa’s Chief of Staff was a shorter, tubby man with an olive complexion by the name of Pablo Rosas. He and Correa sat in a White House conference room, staring at a big screen which now showed the results of the UN vote. “Well, I suppose that went about as well as we could expect,” said Rosas.
“Yep. I was surprised they even agreed with our asking them to kick in some money.”
Rosas chuckled. “Keep in mind that all of this new medical tech will be available for anyone patent-free. Should be air-tight legally, since nobody here on Earth invented it; we’re merely adapting it. I think that was the sweetener we needed to get it passed.”
The president gave a brief nod, then tapped a few keys on the controls in front of her. The screen now showed a world map. “Now we just have to figure out where to put the damn thing without everyone getting butt-mad about it.”
“Hmm.” Rosas laced his fingers over his substantial gut as he regarded the map. “Someplace not ‘the usual’, then.”
Correa growled in frustration. “I keep thinking Switzerland, but I know there’s gonna be a lot of shit flung about that it’s too European-centric. Taiwan would be great; they’ve got both a good tech base and excellent transport infrastructure.”
“But way too controversial, for obvious reasons,” replied Rosas. “Japan?”
“China will, again, kick up a fuss. Huh. New Zealand?”
“That might work. They tend to be more neutral…but then again some might say they’re in too close with Australia, and that this whole effort is too Western-centric.” His eyes flicked back to north on the map. He was about to move his gaze elsewhere, but then he paused. “What about Iceland?”
“Iceland?” Correa almost scoffed, then looked more thoughtfully at the map. “Okay, they’re a NATO member which is a minus. But they tend to remain mostly neutral, which is a plus. Decent transportation infrastructure…don’t we have a naval air base there?”
“I think so, let me check…” Rosas tapped at his phone. “Hey, Jack? What can you tell me about any US naval air bases in Iceland? Just the highlights.” After a couple of minutes, he responded with a curt, “Okay, that’s enough, thanks.”
He put his phone away. “We kinda-sorta have one, at a place called Keflavik. The base there used to be a lot bigger during the Cold War. Then we shut it down after the Soviets were no longer a going concern. Iceland uses it now, and they allow us to fly submarine-search aircraft out of there, but a few years ago they nixed the DOD’s request to rebuild it into a more permanent base.”
“That does work in their favor. It makes for better optics if they’re known for keeping NATO at arm’s length.”
Rosas sat up. “Think the UN will go for it?”
“We can only try. I’ll have our ambassador in Reykjavik make some discreet inquiries, let’s see if they’d be okay with our proposing them as a candidate.”
The Chief of Staff smiled. “If it goes through, this institute will be pumping well north of a billion dollars per year into their economy. That should make it more than ‘okay’.
__________
Agent Cécile Savoie sat in a secure-location breakroom, silently grumbling as she held an as-yet un-drunk mug of coffee in her hands. As the agent-in-charge of the security detail during the Camp David incident, she’d been put on administrative leave, right alongside every other agent who’d been there. But it wasn’t like she had much down time; the inquiry board into that incident now summoned her damn near every other day for yet another round of tedious questioning.
“Hey,” said Hanson as he strolled in, looking just as sour as she felt.
She looked up in surprise. “Hey yourself. I thought you were assigned to the alien detail.”
“I was,” he said as he seated himself across the circular table from her. “Guess being in Alabama when the shitshow went down wasn’t far enough away to be completely out of suspicion. I just finished running my own gauntlet. But the rumor is, I’m getting it easy compared to everyone who was at Camp David, including the special forces people. Especially you.”
“Yeah, it’s pretty much a colonoscopy every day,” she muttered. “Going over the timeline, where I was at which times, who I had direct line of sight on, who I was in radio contact with.” She finally sipped her coffee.
Hanson’s sour expression deepened. “Do you really think it was one of us?”
She sighed. “It has to be. My gut tells me that there’s more than one mole and I told the inquiry board as much. The fuckers who got in knew too much about our patrol patterns, where everyone was, when they’d have a clear shot at an infil. That means someone with access to our methods and comms, and as to the latter we don’t use CB radios.”
The other agent leaned back. “Fuck. I wish I knew why any of us would do that. We’re supposed to be quiet professionals, not frothing radicals.”
Savoie turned the mug in her hands. “Not to tell tales out of school but, through the whisper network, they’ve been leaning hard on the captured dudes from the attack. Apparently one of their main ‘objections’,” and here she made some one-handed air quotes, “is that they think the whole Breaker thing is a ruse. It’s all smoke and mirrors, so that we’ll beg the Coalition to come and save us. And then…well, it gets vague after that but I guess they claim that at best we’ll get turned into the galactic equivalent of a Native American reservation. Worst case, we all get harvested for our precious bodily fluids.”
Hanson stared at her for a moment in disbelief. “That is, if you will forgive the uncouth term, utterly retarded. For chrissake, the Hubble got some beautiful shots of their ship once they’d spun that shield around to reveal it to us. I mean, I’m no spacecraft expert but even I could tell it had gotten the shit pounded out of it.”
She responded with a shrug. “Hey, Flat Earthers are still a thing.”
“Flat Earthers don’t stage FUCKING mortar attacks in our nation’s capital,” snapped Hanson. Then he subsided and spoke more softly. “Sorry, I shouldn’t be so on edge. This whole thing just pisses me off.”
“Join the club,” said Savoie as she sipped more coffee. “I just don’t get it, though.”
Hanson made a gentle ‘continue’ wave of his hand.
She leaned forward. “Okay. Our comrades in the CIA managed to identify the four who made it into the compound. They were all mercenaries, each with at least ten or fifteen years of experience in kicking ass around some of the worst hot spots in the world. Syria, Burma, bunch of places in Africa. One of ‘em even turned out to be ex-Wagner group.”
“Okay?” It was a leading single-word question, but not an unkind one.
“So why was the rest of the attack made up of nothing but a bunch of goddamn shit-kickers? And that includes the aborted attempt in Decatur. I’ve seen the files of those we rounded up in the Camp David attack. They were all low-life idiots just banging around, maybe they might have once held a gun in their lives. Hell, from what I’ve heard, the shootings that triggered the alarm at Camp David were an accident; those intruders were supposed to sneak around that patrol, not kill them. They all had the same top-of-the-line kit, so we know whoever is behind this has deep pockets. Why not hire an entire bunch of competent people instead of doing it onesy-twoseys?”
“It is a puzzle.” Hanson got up and set a styrofoam cup of water into the nearby microwave. As the cup turned within its electromagnetic prison, he leaned against the nearby counter and pondered her question. “Maybe the team in the woods was intended just as a distraction?”
“That’s what I thought at first, but then I reconsidered. I mean, what if the four who went in failed? You’d still need a proper backup plan. Same thing with the Decatur bunch. By the way, did they ever catch them?”
Hanson let out a dark chuckle. “Decatur PD found a pile of vests and rifles, hastily wiped down. They were able to pull a few partial prints off of ‘em. My guess is they’ve fled to the proverbial four winds, hoping to lay low for the rest of their lives. We’ll nab ‘em eventually.”
The microwave dinged and he retrieved his hot water, then pulled a tea bag out of his jacket pocket as he re-seated himself.
Savoie smiled. “I never figured you for a tea guy.”
He unwrapped the bag and with a bit of ceremony dunked it into his cup. “Well, I used to be a coffee guy, but my gut doesn’t agree with the acidity.”
“We do have tea here, you know.” She pointed to the storage bins behind him.
“Yeah, but it’s cheap-ass stuff. The brand I like is expensive, but worth it…” Hanson’s eyes widened as he trailed off.
She raised an eyebrow. “Hanson? Do you smell burnt toast?”
“They couldn’t afford it,” he said in a near-whisper.
Savoie was about to tell him to stop being overly dramatic, then she realized he might be on to something and that she didn’t dare distract him. “Keep talking.”
He leaned forward, his forearms on the table. “Okay. Imagine you’re a hard-bitten mercenary. You’ve been in the literal shit, in every nasty conflict anyone cares to name. Somehow, someone finds you and comes to you. They say ‘hey, these aliens are bad news, do you want to kill them?’ Even if you, as the hypothetical mercenary, are down with the cause…”
“From what the intruders were yelling, they were,” said Savoie.
“Yeah but even then, our mystery financier is asking you to infil and exfil out of one of the most heavily guarded pieces of real estate on the planet. Oh, and kill a bunch of special-forces-maybe and aliens-definitely in between. What do you do then?”
She replied with a grim smile. “If I’m that mercenary, then I ask for a metric fuck-ton of money. And there were four of them, they would have all done the same. Hell, they must have been doing collective bargaining.”
Hanson dunked his tea bag as he thought it through. “Okay, so our mystery mastermind has a lot of money, but not billions on hand to hire a literal army of hard cases. Huh. So those other dipshits might indeed have been a distraction.”
“Maybe. They must have also spent quite a bit on the mortar attack. That wasn’t made by some hobbyist in their bedroom, they knew what they were doing. Given that nobody saw them set up the launcher or leave, they were more pro.” Savoie hoped that the FBI’s efforts to track the various mortar components turned up something soon. Thus far, those efforts were bogged down; as it turned out, quite a few companies had ordered the identified components, and tracking the subsequent second-hand purchases was time-consuming.
“And those mortar-making pros would be more expensive.” Hanson sipped a bit of tea. “Did they ever get anything off of the launcher itself?”
“Sadly, no. Turns out the whole damned thing was homemade, constructed out of tubing and other off-the-shelf components. It was also wiped down thoroughly, no prints. Like I said, pros.”
“But limited in resources,” said Hanson. “Which explains one of the things that’s bugged me. Namely, that our OPFOR didn’t use some proper artillery. If they have a couple of moles in the Secret Service, then it should be easy to recruit and pay some military dudes to slip ‘em some gear and alter the logs. They could stow a howitzer inside a semi-tractor-trailer. You could park that thing anywhere up to 25 miles away. Use a single 155mm Excalibur GPS-guided munition, boom. That would have pretty much obliterated the stage and everyone on it. Then you just re-stow the howitzer and toodle off all innocent-like, right when everyone is freaking the hell out.”
“So they couldn’t afford that type of arty strike,” she said. “Or they simply didn’t have the contacts to pull that off. Hmm. I wonder if our moles are getting paid at all?”
Hanson resumed his thousand-yard stare. “The mortar attack must have been planned first. The other two attacks feel much more like rush jobs.”
“Eh? Oh, I get it. Sadaf’s speech was known well in advance. It was going to be one of her first big public appearances since the initial presidential speech. They were broadcasting it online to the world. Having her get turned into chunky red salsa, in real time, would be one helluva statement. So that’s what they focused on.” She drank a bit more coffee, and now it was time for her eyes to widen. “Our mole or moles didn’t arrive at Camp David until after Sadaf’s speech was announced.”
“That…oh, yeah, that makes sense. Originally the mortar attack is the OPFORs’ only focus, but yet somehow they’ve suborned one or two Secret Service agents and they have ‘em in their back pocket. Then one, or better yet both, of the moles gets assigned to the Camp David detail, and they realize that now that they have a golden opportunity to get at the other aliens as well. So they go off and hire four pros for the actual attack inside, plus a bunch of chucklefucks to act as a distraction, because that’s all they can afford since the four pros are asking for some serious money.”
Savoie leaned forward. “When did Chao and Grakosh leave Camp David?”
“It was, ah, three? No, four days after we got everyone settled, both the aliens and the special forces types.”
“Okay, so then the OPFOR gets word, courtesy of our moles, that one of the aliens is now heading to Alabama. But now they’re stretched so thin that they can’t afford anything other than to hire another bunch of dipshits to make a run at them and hope for the best.”
“And then the second bunch lets the FNG drive.”
They both laughed, but that humor settled down as they both thought through the chain of inference.
“It is pretty thin,” said Savoie at last. “There’s a lot of assumptions in there.”
“Yeah. But I do like the idea of our moles getting assigned at the last minute.”
She rubbed her forehead. “We had a bunch of new people come in when they decided to stow the Rithro crew there. Seven, no eight in all.”
“It’s a place to start,” said Hanson. He finished his tea. “C’mon, let’s see if we can get a meeting with the inquiry board.”
__________
A little while later and not very far away, three people sat in a well-lit but otherwise deadly dull room. At least the chairs were somewhat comfortable. Matt and Martinez sat at two chairs against one wall, while across from them McCoy sat sprawled sideways on another with a foul look on her face. She glowered at the far beige-painted wall. “This completely sucks. Why can’t we have our phones? I could at least play some mahjong.”
“This is a secure location, Corporal,” replied Matt. “Ixnay on the onephays.”
Martinez’s leg jittered. “How long are we gonna sit here? They said they’d call us in, like, an hour ago!”
“Dunno, it’s some kind of last-minute interview thing,” replied Matt with Zen-like calm.
The corporal looked over at Matt. “I don’t get you, man.”
Matt grinned. “Nobody gets me. I’m like the wind, baby!”
“That’s not…I mean, I watched you open up a dude like he was a bag of fuckin’ Doritos using nothing but a fuckin’ knife. Now you’re being all Caine from ‘Kung Fu’.”
“It’s good to know that the classics are still appreciated,” said Matt.
Martinez pointed at him. “If you start calling me ‘Grasshopper’ I will shoot you.”
McCoy turned her glare to the ceiling. “Maybe it’s a psychological test. They want to see if we crack under pressure and start yakking secrets.”
“I mean, I’m sure they’re recording us right now,” replied Matt. “But it’s merely as a precaution. I am also five-nines certain that none of us are suspects. We weren’t integrated into the compound’s overall security, and thus it would be unlikely that we could have let our four attackers in.”
“Not to mention, we were the ones to kill ‘em,” added Martinez. “Well, except for the one that Takh took care of.”
“Yep. This is…I won’t call it a formality, but the board just wants to know where you were and what you saw. Walk them through your personal timelines, understand? Tell them only what you know. If you don’t know something, then say so.”
McCoy turned herself around so that she now sprawled the other way. “This whole bullshit just bugs me. Takh and the others are off with a bunch of strangers and I…I mean, we aren't there to help protect them.”
Matt and Martinez shared a meaningful glance. “From what I heard, Takh is quite capable of taking care of himself,” said the latter with a grin. “You told me he pitched that one dude across the room like he was throwing a softball.”
For once, the petite corporal looked a bit flustered. “Yeah, but, I mean, what if some other potential bad guy gets the drop on him with a gun? I don’t like not being there. I just wanna know that he’s okay. I should be there, just to make sure.”
The smaller man snapped his fingers in the face of the taller, who sighed and took out his wallet. With great ceremony, Matt pulled out a five-dollar bill and placed it upon the now-upraised palm of Martinez.
“Told ya,” said Martinez with a grin.
She sat up and glared at them both. “That doesn’t mean anything! Takh is a good guy!”
“Nobody said he wasn’t,” replied Matt as he stowed his wallet. “He is indeed a good guy.”
“Yeah, seriously, we’re glad you two hooked up,” added Martinez. “Takh’s solid. Hell, I’d let him date my sister.”
“I. Am. Not. Hooked Up. With ANYONE.” McCoy now looked furious enough to chew nails.
Martinez stroked his chin. “Kissing might be a problem, though.”
Matt performed a similar chin-stroking action. “Hmm, indeed, Corporal, I do believe it might be a serious issue. One has all of those mandibles to contend with.” He hooked his fingers next to his mouth in an approximation of an udhyr’s face. “Still, I think that, with enough will and effort, one could figure it out. Like the man said, life finds a way.”
“But how much tongue is he packing?” posed Martinez. “You know what the man also says. Big dude, big tongue. Could make things more interesting, all around.”
The woman did not look amused. “Martinez, Toke? You are now both officially gigantic flatulating assholes.”
“C’mon, McCoy!” protested Martinez. “Think of it this way. A few years from now, let’s say we filthy humans are now part of the Coalition and I’m at some meet ‘n greet, and I just so happen to spy me an oh-so-very-fiiine udhyr mamacita from across the room. Now, I wanna do my bit for my species and approach her, and get some good old inter-species cultural interaction going on. But there’s all sorts of questions. How do I compliment her without insulting her culture? How am I supposed to get in good with her? How do the mechanics work? How do the various bits line up? We need details! You’re at the tip of the spear, we all need good intel!”
McCoy slumped back into her seat. “Over seven hundred billion Dimmadollars of defense spending, and yet somehow I wind up stuck in a room with you two fuckos…oh, by the way, Toke,” she added, pointing a finger at Matt, “why the hell can you and Sarge never go back to Okinawa?”
“Nice distraction, McCoy,” said Martinez. “My guess is some sort of wet-work shit.”
Matt just smiled. “Oh for fuck’s sake, I don’t kill everyone I meet. I was a Second LT at the time, managed to somehow leapfrog my way into officer ranks all the way from enlisted. Anyways, the Okinawa affair was merely a case of, well, one particular case of rye whiskey. The good sergeant…was he a sergeant then? Oh yeah, we had done some other stuff I can’t tell you about in someplace I can’t tell you where, and we were celebrating Shaw getting his third stripe. We’d got ahold of the previously-mentioned case of whiskey and then we began toasting to each other’s good health. We did a lot of toasting. Quite a lot of toasting. As you can imagine, the toasting went on and on until we, um, well we did some unwise things. It started out with us sparring-for-fun with each other in public and escalated from there. No locals were harmed, and nothing we did was hella illegal, or I would’ve never made Captain. Buuut the local government would definitely throw a shitfit if me or, God forbid, both of us set foot back on the island.” He chuckled. “Hell, the Okinawan customs people probably still have both of our pictures taped up inside their booths with a big old sign saying ‘DO NOT ADMIT THIS PERSON, YOU FOOL’ written above them.”
“What did you do?” asked Martinez. His eyes were big and soulful, like a kid asking for yet one more story before bedtime.
Matt shrugged. “I mean, I don’t remember much for obvious reasons. I’m almost sure we didn’t piss on any monuments, that would have definitely been cause for a serious demotion. We did do a number on some shrubbery, that I do remember. We decided it needed to be trimmed back, and so we did so. Using our bare hands. Seemed like a good idea at the time.”
A fearsome light came into McCoy’s eyes. “Martinez, do you know what this means?”
He looked at her all uncertain. “Um, Toke and Sarge have cast-iron livers?”
“No, you fool. Blackmail material.”
Matt pointed back at her. “Hey, now, I told you that in confidence. Besides, Shaw has a lot more to contend with right now.”
The reminder of the sergeant’s current crippled state brought the elevated atmosphere of the room back down. McCoy nodded as her smile faded. “Right. Hey, did you see the Prez’s speech at the UN?”
“Yep,” said Matt. “From what I’ve read, the political wrangling after it seems pretty tame compared to the usual.”
Martinez snorted. “No shit. Did either of you see the laundry list of shit that we might be able to do? Anti-aging, limb regrowth, cancer treatments which work well and which don’t half-kill the patient…hell, maybe even Alzheimer’s could be in our rear-view mirror. The grand high muckity-mucks are falling all over themselves to get that out into the world, for themselves if nobody else.”
“You’re way too cynical, Martinez,” said Matt.
“Oh fuck off. What if…okay, I know this sounds like a cheesy sci-fi concept, but what if they hoard all of the good shit for themselves and we peons get just the crumbs?”
Matt lapsed back into his meditative demeanor. “In that case, my dear corporal, you or I or McCoy or someone like us will show those hypothetical elites that, while they are indeed long-lived, they are not in fact immortal.”
The trio fell into silence for a few minutes. Then Martinez leaned over towards Matt. “Ah, a little birdie told me you were involved in questioning the prisoners we nabbed at Camp David.”
“I merely facilitated certain conversations,” replied Matt.
Martinez sighed. “What the fuck does that mean?”
“Ask me no questions and I will tell you no lies…Corporal.”
McCoy let out a growl. “Well, I heard these terrorist assholes are saying that the Breakers aren’t real, that it’s all fake videos from the Coalition.”
“Just to play devil’s advocate,” said Matt, “our AI image and video generation is already getting to the point where, soon, we puny humans could manufacture such evidence.”
“What?” Martinez looked as if he was about to launch himself at Matt.
Matt held up a calming hand. “I’m not saying it is fake. The Hubble pics are damned convincing.”
Martinez hiked up one foot to place it on his seat, then rested his chin on his knee. “Fuck. I guess it didn’t convince everyone.” He mused for a few moments. “Wait. What if we made it even more convincing?”
“How?” asked Matt.
“We send some humans up to the Rithro. Two or three at least. The boats can still make it up to the ship, right?”
For once Matt looked uncertain. “I think so? Dunno how many times they can come and go without recharging, we’ll have to ask ‘em.”
“Right, so we set up an even better publicity stunt than the Hubble pics. Choose a few people, from all over the world. We have ‘em travel up to the Rithro, take pics and video up close showing the damage. Even take ‘em inside the ship and get a full tour, maybe…if the crew is okay with that, of course.”
“Huh.” Matt sat back and pondered the idea. “That’s a really good idea, Martinez. I guess you aren’t as dumb as you look.”
The corporal responded with a slight smile at the verbal jab. “We’d need to choose the right people, though.”
“They’d have to be trustworthy…or at least someone that the entire world will consider trustworthy,” said Matt.
“Well known,” added McCoy. She no longer looked vengeful. “With recognizable faces and voices, and then they can go on all the talk shows after and say that, yes indeed, I got a tour of the ship and it is indeed quite banged up.”
Martinez stared at the far wall. “Some kind of celebrity? Heh. You think Tom Cruise would be up for it?”
Matt laughed. “That beautiful maniac? Hell, he’d insist on shooting an entire movie up there, with at least one action scene where he’s hanging off of the outside of the ship.”
They all smiled at the resulting mental image.
“Chao could work,” said McCoy into the silence. “She’s kind of a celebrity now. After all, she was the first human to come into contact with aliens, eh?” She gave Matt a big and very un-subtle wink.
To skirt the rather…unconventional methods used to achieve a positive First Contact, Matt’s role had been very much demoted in the official story. Now every recounting of the tale included a bit of ‘…oh, and there was also another person who stumbled across our brave woman in the midst of her attempts at informational exchange with the aliens…” His exact identity was also not published, under the screen of ‘he wishes to remain anonymous’.
“Oh bite me, McCoy, it’s fun,” replied Matt. He waggled his eyebrows. “Besides, I work better in the shadows!” He threw his forearm across his face like a half-assed Count Dracula trying to hide behind his cape.
Then he dropped his arm. “Yeah, Chao would be good as a current social-media darling. Of course, she might not want that. She strikes me as more of the wallflower type, for the most part.”
“We need more people,” said Martinez, as he stared at the floor. “Chao might be good on her own, but she’s got that motor-mouth talking thing when you get her going. It’s one or the other. Either she’s trying to shrink into a corner and take up as little space as possible, or suddenly you’re getting pulled into another corner for a doctoral dissertation on how minimal-energy transfer-orbits work.”
Matt pondered for a moment. “Wait, when did she do that? I never sat through one of those lectures.”
Martinez looked away and…well, Matt hoped that their supposed overlords were indeed recording this particular moment in time because the hard-bitten Hispanic special-forces corporal actually blushed.
McCoy, of course, realized a golden opportunity for payback and immediately pounced. “Why, Corporal Martinez,” she purred. “Doooo tell us. When did Chao Me Chu, heh, pull you into a corner? Hmmm?”
“She’s…she’s just real nice, that’s all,” replied Martinez. “I asked her a couple of questions, and she answered them. That’s all. We both love classic sci-fi, like Asimov and shit. I guess we bonded over that.”
Matt cleared his throat. “Aaaaand may I remind you two and everyone listening in that we have all been cooped up nuts-to-butts for awhile? Don’t mistake familiarity for romantic bullshit.” He pointed over at Martinez. “But you. If you can follow at least half of what she talks about, then you are absolutely without-a-single-fucking-doubt wasted as a corporal, even if you’re in a low-drag high-speed outfit like this. You hear me?”
“Um, yes sir.” It was the first time in McCoy’s memory that anyone had addressed Matt as befitting his perhaps-former rank.
“Good. You get your ass into college, somehow. You’re a smart guy, you’ll figure all that shit out. And as for Chao? Just give it room to breathe. Let her know you’re interested, but don’t press the matter.”
“Let her know?” For once Martinez looked completely lost. “How do I…” he trailed off. “I mean, I like her…and yeah, I mean I like her in that way, but she’s so damn smart and pretty and I’m just some dipshit meathead.”
“Hey, don’t sell yourself short,” said Matt. “You’re our dipshit meathead.”
McCoy’s vengeful smile faded. “Martinez…no, Luca.”
Martinez looked up in surprise at her use of his first name.
She continued. “Just talk to her. Neither of you have any clue as to what ‘normal’ social interactions look like. In your case, it’s because you’ve been a soldier for all of your adult life. In her case, it’s because she’s, well, because she’s Chao. So just walk up to her and be straightforward. Trust me, it’ll be like a breath of fresh air for her to not have to navigate social cues. Just say something like ‘Hey, I really like you, do you like me and do you want to go get a coffee sometime’? Start with that. Chao’s good people, the worst thing she’ll do is say no. She won’t yell at you or talk shit about you online. Buuuut, some sixth sense is telling me she won’t say no to getting some coffee with ya.”
Matt smiled. “McCoy, I think you might have a calling after you leave the military.”
She snorted. “Oh yeah, I’ll hang up my match-making shingle on the internet and start raking in the big bucks. Martinez is right, though. If we try to do a publicity stunt up at the Rithro, then we’ll need somebody alongside Chao to win the world over. Somebody well-known, but preferably someone not in the traditional Western pop-culture sphere. That’ll make it more palatable…”
Her voice trailed off and she stared into space. The two men now looked at each other in genuine concern until she spoke again a few moments later.
“Guys? I think I just had the best idea ever.”

I nearly always play Zero Build and rarely try creator islands, but I'm running out of quests at Level 190 in the battle pass and I'm needing a strategy to grind those last 10 levels. Without quests, I'm lucky to get more than 15k XP per match, and that's assuming I make top 10. At that rate, I'll have to play 75-100 matches this weekend to get the necessary 800k XP. Anyone know of a creator island that will help me knock this out faster? I promised my Twitch viewers that I'd make level 200 the hard way this season, and I want to come through for my fans.

I think the 'D' is not an exclusive clan. Instead, it represents an alliance that traces its origins back to Joyboy. This alliance, spearheaded by Joyboy, was intended to establish a world free from slavery, prejudice, and racism against any race or ethnicity. Inclusion in the 'D' family comes about when one adds 'D' to their name.
However, this 'D' alliance began to pose a significant threat to several kingdoms globally. The rulers of these kingdoms, fearing the potential loss of their power and status, decided to wage war against the 'D' alliance. Their success was contingent upon their use of an ancient weapon, one that belongs to Alabasta and is under the control of Queen Lily or her father. They eventually managed to destroy the ancient kingdom, after which Imu eradicated all the islands that were part of the 'D' alliance.
Unexpectedly, Lily sided with these kingdoms. It's speculated that she may have been deceived. Once she uncovered Imu's true intentions, as well as those of the kings who are now the celestial dragons, she swore to keep the 'D' alive by dispersing the Poneglyph throughout the world.
The circumstances of Lily's death remain a mystery - she could have died a natural death or have been killed by Imu upon discovering her change of heart. Regardless, her decision to sign her name as a 'D' is convincing proof that she ultimately sided with the 'D' alliance, and it wasn't an error.
Imu sought to eliminate Vivi due to her ability to control the ancient weapon, much like Momo and Shirahoshi.
However, some pieces of this narrative puzzle are still missing, such as the timing of Lily's alliance switch - was it during the war or afterward? And if it was afterward, how did Imu manage to defeat Joyboy and his alliance? Particularly considering Joyboy's near god-like status and his adventures across the globe with Zunesha?
What do you think?

< Previous Episode First Episode
Based on the fourth round of the elimination contest by u/Ok_Dragonfruit_9612
Spoiler tag only for basic character spoilers
Chris: Last time on Total Drama Triple D. Before the morning even started Topher was put out of commission for the day. Too bad, because he missed the epic callback challenge! Teams chose members to do the classic thousand-foot cliff jump into shark infested waters! Some succeeded, some failed and some were just plain old chickens. But don't count your chickens before they hatch, as in the second half of the challenge Cameron helped her team build a proper boat and Lightning paddled the Lions to their first victory. While Sierra straight up threw DJ into the water! Bro, seriously couldn't swim, whatta ya know? In the end The Octopi came in last and voted Sierra out of the competition. Can the Lions keep the wins aloft and will the Narwhals continue to sail on by in this competition. Find out right now on Total Drama Triple D of Danganronpa: Despair Disaster!
[Cut to the boys cabin. Korekiyo sitting on the floor quietly chanting]
Makoto: Hmph…huh?
Korekiyo: Good morning, Mr. Naegi
Makoto: What time is it? Where's Mondo?
Keebo: It's 7:30 in the morning and he left around 6:15.
Shuichi: You've been awake since then, Keebo?
Keebo: No, I was still in sleep mode, but my eyes still record everything and stores it in my memory banks.
Ryoma: So, you are always recording everything that's happened?
Kokichi: Ew, never took you to be a voyeur key-boy, nee hee hee.
Keebo: T-that's not it at all!
Makoto: I'm gonna go look for Mondo-oof oh, sorry Mikan.
Mikan: No, I'm sorry for being in your way please forgive me.
Shuichi: What's up, Mikan?
Mikan: I'm just letting members of your team know that Taka is feeling better. He should be ready to join you all later this morning.
Makoto: Ah, that's great. Thanks for the update, Mikan.
Mikan: If you'd like, you can talk with him, but you'll have to wait until Mondo is done.
Shuichi: Huh, Mondo went to visit Taka?
Kokichi: Hey, no fair. He's part of our team, not yours, Shuichi!
Shuichi: I didn't tell him to go there.
Makoto: Maybe I'll go see how he's doing.
Nagito: Mind if I come along? I must make it up to Taka for causing him so much pain.
Makoto: Sure, I guess it'd be okay.
[Cut to Nagito and Makoto walking to the infirmary tent]
Nagito: I must say we really struggled without him. To think without our Moral Compass, we crumbled as a team.
Makoto: Well, I wouldn't say it was all because we didn't have Taka, but hopefully we can bounce back from this loss.
Nagito: Ah yes, we really do just need to have hope.
Makoto: Right…oh there's Sayaka! Good morning!
Sayaka: Oh yes, good morning, Makoto, Nagito.
Makoto: Is everything okay? You don't seem like yourself this morning.
Nagito: Maybe it is due to the harrowing close loss of yesterday. But cheer up for today is a new day!
Sayaka: Thanks Nagito…I guess. But actually, it's more about Himiko.
Makoto: What's wrong with Himiko?
Sayaka: Well last night she slept on the other side of the girl's cabin. Maybe it was just so she didn't have to sleep with Junko but this morning she's just been really quiet. Even more than usual.
Makoto: Really? What do you think is going on?
Sayaka: If I had to guess, she's probably missing Tenko. I think they were good friends so seeing her leave already is getting to her.
Nagito: Really, this is all about Tenko, huh? Such a shame to see Himiko be hurt by our decision, but it was a decision that had to be made, nonetheless.
Sayaka: If you say so. I dread us coming in last. I worry that my team doesn't see me as a valuable teammate and will vote me off like Tenko.
Makoto: Well, uh, that's not exactly why we voted off Tenko, but don't be thinking like that, Sayaka. You're super talented and they should be proud to have you on your team.
Nagito: Better than having the talent of luck. Much good that did for us last challenge.
Makoto: Yeah…at least here we're not really judged on talent so much.
Sayaka: [giggle] You're right, thank you guys for the confidence boost. I guess Taka's really rubbing off on you, Makoto. By the way have you heard anything about him?
Makoto: Oh, right Mikan said he's feeling better and we're actually on our way to go see him.
Sayaka: Well, then I won't keep you guys. See you later then and tell Taka I'm glad he's feeling better.
Nagito: But you're not on our team. Wouldn't it be beneficial to you if we're down another member?
Sayaka: Ugh, I never liked all this inter-team drama. It's bad enough we have inner team drama with Miu and Fuyuhiko, and now Junko's upset with Himiko. Plus, he's still part of our class, right? Anyway, I've said enough. See you later, boys. [She runs off towards the dining cabin]
Makoto: Bye, Sayaka. [to Nagito] It's strange I never thought about everyone feeling they may not be beneficial to their team. I mean they are Ultimates but I guess talent doesn't matter too much in this competition.
Nagito: But being Ultimates means they'll always have the hope to succeed in any challenge they are faced with. Not like us useless Ultimates with nothing talents. No wonder we lost the last competition.
Makoto: Well, I hope Taka can motivate the team again. Speaking of which, we're here.
Nagito: Interesting, it sounds like he's still not alone in there.
Makoto: Hey, you're right! Is that Mondo?
Mondo: …and then Nekomaru paddled everyone back to shore himself. Bro, it was incredible. To think the big guy finally came through with his wanton speed.
Taka: Sounds absolutely amazing! I really hate that I missed out on such a worthwhile competition.
Makoto: Yeah, we really could've used you.
Mondo: O-oh, hey Makoto, Nagito, what are you doing here?
Nagito: We should ask you the same question. What's a guy from the other team doing talking to our teammate? Trying to weigh in the on competition I see. Figures you'd resort to such underhanded tactics.
Mondo: What'd you say? You think that's how it is?!
Taka: Hold on bro, I'll take care of this. Actually Nagito, Makoto, Mondo here was just recounting everything I missed yesterday. And I appreciate it. Nice to wake up to a bro who's got your back even if we are on different teams.
Nagito: Oh, then my bad for jumping to conclusions. I just came to apologize for causing you harm. Although, it's to be expected when you're around me.
Taka: Apology accepted, Nagito!
Makoto: But Mondo, have you really been here since around 6:15 when Keebo saw you leave the cabin.
Mondo: Well, yeah, I-uh care about the well-being of my classmates is all. Even if we are in a competition. I don't wanna see them get weak, y'know.
Taka: Well put, bro. Plus you've proven to me that even team boundaries shouldn't matter when it comes to supporting each other. This may be a competition, but we're friends first and foremost!
Nagito: Yes, I love it. The kind of inspiration we need from the Ultimate Moral Compass. I can feel the hope in succeeding in this competition rejuvenating us as we speak.
Makoto:.........
Taka:........All right then.
Mondo: Hey, he's your teammate.
[The three laugh as the camera pans to Junko eavesdropping outside]
[Confessional]
Junko: [cutesy] Oh, the hope returns to our team and makes us just the best of friends! [normal] Hgggck! Give me a break! Still there is too much comrade going on. Time for a little sibling talk, like old times.
[End]
[Cut to the girl's cabin]
Sonia: Don't be too late for breakfast, okay Mukuro!
Mukuro: Don't worry, I'm just going to take a quick look around the camp. It won't take long. [Leaves through the door]
Junko: Hey ya, ugly!
Mukuro: Agh, u-uh yes, good morning to you too, sister.
Junko: Hey, no need to be so formal. We're not carrying out anything now, so feel free to take it easy. Call me Junko or Heather if you want. I'm still going to call you ugly though.
Mukuro: Yes, of course Junko.
Junko: So, how are you getting along with your team, huh? Probably the best of friends, right?
Mukuro: Well, we haven't lost a challenge since the first but…
Junko: But you've never won, like my team! So, you wanna be useful to your team then?
Mukuro: I do but everything I do never helps us win, just well, not get last.
Junko: That's because you're playing it too safe, stupid. You gotta play dirty to get ahead, like moi! Just don't get caught, okay. I can't bail your sorry butt out when we're not on the same team.
Mukuro: Play dirty? But how should I do that?
Junko: Hey, you're mildly smart. I bet you could figure it out yourself. Just focus on sabotaging a team to make sure you're not last. Simple as that really
Mukuro: I see….
Junko: Well, that's all I wanted to say. Gotta meet with my amazing team for breakfast now. Bye ya, Mukie! [Walks passed to leave but stops to solemnly say] Don't disappoint me, again.
[Mukuro stands there for a bit after Junko leaves]
Aoi: Oh, Mukuro you're still here?
Mukuro: Huh? What?
Sonia: I thought you were going to take a walk.
Mukuro: Oh yes, I-it was just a quick walk. I'm already back.
Hiyoko: Well then, enough yapping. I'm hungry and we've wasted enough time as it is. Kyoko and Peko are probably already eating by now.
Sonia: Yes, let's do the dipping. Right, girls!
Aoi: [chuckle] Sure thing, Sonia.
Mukuro: Hmhm, yes of course.
[Confessional]
Mukuro: Junko's right, I have been feeling worthless, but still, I can't say my team's completely against me, right? A little sabotage shouldn't hurt anything…
[End]
[Cut to the dining cabin]
Junko: So, my wonderful team, how's everyone doing?
Mikan: Uh um, fine, I guess?
Rantaro: We're kinda down two teammates right now.
Sayaka: I don't think Himiko is going to join us right now. She's still lying in cabin.
Toko: Okay then where is Fake Master?
Tsumugi: [chuckle]
Fuyuhiko: You mean the Byakuya from our class. No clue, the guy just up and left early this morning. Not a word from him but he's been quiet anyway.
Tsumugi: [giggle]
Miu: Alright, four-eyes what's got you so giddy.
Tsumugi: Hmhm, wait for it…
Gonta: Wait for what?
[The dining room door swings open and inside walks Imposter. He is no longer wearing his white suit, but instead has on a red sweatshirt, jean shorts, a black jacket, and a red baseball cap turned backwards.]
Mikan: What the…Byakuya?
[Imposter puts his hand up and then holds them out close together]
Mikan: No sorry… less, right? So just B then?
[Imposter gives a thumbs up]
Tsumugi: What do you think! B asked me to make him this outfit last night. I think it suits his new personality quite well.
Byakuya: Hold it right there. [He gets up from the Rhinos table] I see, so this is your new gimmick, huh? [Studies Imposter] Well, better than thinking you could possibly be me.
Toko: So true, no one could ever replace Master.
Chris: Good morning, campers! I hope you're all rested and ready for today's challenge. Hmm, it seems most of the teams are missing some people.
Akane: Did Nagito hurt Taka and Makoto this time?
Kaede: Akane!
Taka: Don't worry Octopi, I have arrived with the others ready and raring to start a new day!
Kaede: Taka! Thank goodness you're feeling better.
Ibuki: We absolutely missed you! Topher's team was totally falling apart with you.
Keebo: Well, I wouldn't say that, but we were a little unstable without your guidance.
Chris: That's great for you guys, but enough with the reunion, I'm trying to get this show going. Topher, Cody, Harold and Brick take your seats. So that only leaves…Narwhals where's Staci?
Sayaka: She's...uh, not feeling well. I mean she's not sick, but I don't think she's up to being with us today.
Chris: Like I care about your personal feelings and neither do the viewing audience. Chef, go bring Staci her-
Himiko: Don't bother…Nyeh, I'm here now.
Chris: Great! Now we can finally get this challenge started. I feel like we've wasted nine minutes on pointless stuff.
Tsumugi: Himiko, are you alright?
Himiko: I'm fine, okay. I was just…. Nyeh, getting hungry that's all. Guess I was needed here anyway.
Chris: Indeed, because we're about to begin the next challenge. It's another Flashback Challenge: The Talent Competition!
Nagito: Oh my, a Talent Competition, with the most talented people in the world. How exhilarating.
Chris: Exactly. I've been watching you all and noticed you're pretty much freaks of nature when it comes to talent, so I thought it'd fit this group the best. However originally this competition just had teams pick three members to perform individually. This time you have to pick at least three members to perform together! Use your freaky talents to make one big display which Chef and I will grade not just on the impressiveness of the talent but also the cohesiveness of the members performing. So, get to choosing your performers. The competition will start in three hours.
Korekiyo: A question, Chris. You said at least three of us must perform but could there be more?
Chris: Sure, if more of you want to embarrass yourselves go for it. Let's just say no more than five to not crowd up the stage. Now hurry, times a wastin!
[Team Raging Rhinos]
Sonia: Alright team, let's first decide who's going to be performing.
Hiyoko: I could do a dance if the rest of you want to perform around that.
Kyoko: Ideally, it'd be one of us who has a more concrete and flashy talent. So unfortunately, I would be no help as a detective here.
Byakuya: I wouldn't want to help even if I could. Performing is for the peasants who can't get ahead in life.
Sonia: While I don't share the same sentiments as Byakuya, I don't believe being an Ultimate Princess is going to be too flashy of a talent here either.
Kazuichi: I could definitely build something to go along with someone else's performance.
Sonia: Oh, how about Gundham putting on a show with his Dark Devas.
Gundham: Speak not, Dark Lady, for the Devas do not trifle with the mediocrity of carefree showmanship.
Yasuhiro: Come on man, just have them do flips around Hiyoko while she's dancing or something.
Hiyoko: Ew gross! I don't want those filthy hamsters anywhere near me when I dance.
Gundham: You dare insult the cleanliness of my Devas! I'll have you know they not only know how to clean themselves of filth from this dimension but several beyond as well!
Leon: Dude chill, no one's insinuating anything about your hamsters.
Aoi: I doubt we could get a swimming pool on that stage.
Sonia: No, probably not. Peko, Mukuro, do you have any thoughts?
Peko: Well, my skills with a sword could be considered performative, but I'm not sure how well it'll fit with Hiyoko's dancing.
Mukuro: I don't suppose we have any guns or knives around. Those are really the only thing I'm good with.
Yasuhiro: Well, I'm not sure about guns, but there's probably some knives in the kitchen.
Hiyoko: Knives, with my dancing?! How's the even going to work dumb[bleep].
Yasuhiro: H-hey, I'm just trying to help. No need to get so hostile.
Kazuichi: I bet we could think of some way to tie it all together.
Byakuya: I'd say it's worth a shot. Let both of the weakest links fail together.
[Confessional]
Byakuya: I'm not truly sure who's the weakest link in our team. The annoying dancer was definitely it at first, but recently the soldier girl hasn't been very useful in challenges, always falling short. No better way to weed them out then put their talents against each other, I'd theorize. And if we lose, it'll be obvious who to vote out.
[End]
To be continued

[ [FIRST] [NEXT>]
Season 5 “Exotic Pets”
Episode 1 “The Night's Weave”
In any other professional setting, doing what he was currently doing would be considered highly unprofessional. In fact, even in any other precinct what he was doing right now would be very unprofessional. Usually, walking through the front door with your boss clinging to your arm like a swooning teenager would generally be interpreted only one way.
Thankfully, nobody specifically cared about this in this precinct, nor did they come to the obvious conclusion “Thank you, I’ll finish recovering in the break room” she says, with a trembling voice.
“You sure you don’t want me there?” admittedly, playing this role wasn’t really professional either for him but everyone understood the need of it.
“Yes” Keya lets go of Santos’ arm “I’ll just do the thing and drink something cold, then I can start this waking properly” she gently taps her tail on his shoulder “Now go get to work”
He sighs as he walks back to his desk. They had a wonderful two days with nothing happening after the short little session of everything happening, it was unsurprising that she’d start processing things through her nightmares now, leading those being screaming days. “‘least it isn’t the cold bastard yet” he mutters as he sits down.
And so here he planned to spend the rest of his work day getting mighty annoyed at their Regional Firebase. That damned place was in charge of both the fiscal, maitenance and archivistic functions for all the precincts in this area, not only they held the pursestrings of the operation they were also the ones in charge of maintaining equipment, assigning personnel and keeping all the information they needed to work up to date. And they seemed to hate him. Him, specifically, because the problems only started happening when he got here.
Of course he wasn’t just getting annoyed at the Regional for no reason, he was getting annoyed at them for their sheer incompetence, and he hoped it was incompetence, at keeping up data. He’d been hunting down any information about some old unsolved cases, and he’d been getting more luck with random phone calls to other precincts halfway across the planet than an official request to his own Regional.
Sadly, not every plan survives contact with the work day. After some time he feels a presence nearby and turns to look, there is Keya looking mostly like her normal self, except perhaps more tired than normal. She brings her holopad down to put it against his, transferring mission data “Nothing serious, or at least nothing dangerous. But we really should take this call”
He looks down at his device and calls up the mission data he’s just received. Predator sighting near… Orran’s house? Bit too close for comfort, real sightings are usually at the farms, but scarcely any information. Just something small and quadrupedal is the useful information, the rest is just usual ‘predator’ panic speech. “This looks like a ghost call, but sure I’ll go” he stands up and starts heading towards the garage, but stops and turns around “Stay here boss, no need to-”
“Yes there is, don’t worry about me” Keya takes a deep breath “I’m not at full capacity but i’m fine, let’s go” she walks past him.
With a shrug, he follows. As they settle in the car and Keya starts driving, he picks up his holopad to re-read the mission data. Nothing, obviously, has changed but he gives it more attention now. Small quadruped, fast, like a shadow… If there were any other humans here he’d believe it was someone’s pet cat, but without anyone dumb enough to bring an exotic animal to an alien planet in sight that’s unlikely. Sadly, none of the usual trash-diggers quite match either.
But there’s one final detail that’s weird. This… Isn’t the first call. There’s been a lot more calls related to this one, an entire fifty eight different calls all tied to this same incident report. He starts following links to the previous calls and checking them- All of them are the same incident, small quadruped, fast and like a shadow… And they were all marked as minimal priority, and left forgotten and unattended.
With a raised eyebrow he continues to check, seeing the dates of the reports. They were insistent, and have been going on for a while now. They’re not older than his presence here, but aside from them having stopped completely for the previous five days, those calls have been a daily occurrence. And each and every one of them was set to minimum priority by Keya herself, and promptly forgotten. Which indicated there had to be something going on here, because she’d never leave a call forgotten like this, at least not when she woke up screaming.
“Boss-” but before he can say anything, they’ve arrived. A considerably different house than the rest of the residences of the town, Orran had been living here long enough to have completely rebuilt his house in the style of his people, or at least the exterior and a few additions. It was weirdly tall for his size despite being only one floor, the exterior was coated with a material that looked like an earthen-brown daub but the evenness of the striations in the material showed an artistic care in its application beyond the means of manual work. The windows were higher in the walls than in a normal venlil residence and they seemed to have multiple layers, both glass and wood were used in their construction with the final layer being some form of metal.
“Huhn, I wonder if the weather on his homeworld is that wild?” he says, staring at the windows. He’s familiar with that kind of design, it could easily be used to control airflow to various degrees and help regulate temperature. But this entire getup seemed like overkill to him, unless wherever this was used had the breadth of half of Earth’s weather happening in the same area.
“Only about where I lived” Orran’s voice echoes from behind the door, which consists of a mesh door behind a wooden door. The yotul opens them and offers him an ear flick “Nightmare weather that place, used to have a flood gate in the house too. Only good thing the feds to that town was deepening the river to handle the summer floodwaters”
Santos blinks, looks at the agriculturalist, looks back at the car where Keya still is, then back at the yotul “Dang, have I been just staring here for long? I got kind of distracted, haven’t ever actually stopped by to watch your house before”
“Oh, feel free to take it in. Took some effort to get the wattle and daub look just right, not really helping the primitive stereotype much” he says with a joyful wave of his tail “But what can I say, I’m wild nations, feds ain’t the first to call me primitive and i’m still proud of it. Still, to what do I owe the honor?”
He tilts his head to the side slightly, taking in the man’s words for a moment. They made a distressing amount of sense, guess the Yotul would still remember those parts of their own history. But he was here for a job “Yeah, we got a sighting report around here” he picks up his holopad and brings it up “In fact a report in your residence. Do you mind if I look around real quick?”
He notices Orran’s tail stilling “Hrm? I can say I haven’t seen anything, and I live here”
Taking a deep breath Santos stares at the yotul, he knows the flinch isn’t an instinctive reaction “Orran. A few paws ago you didn’t notice the nixa’s claw marks in your kitchen. And this call came in today” then he turns his stare to the side with a sigh “I just want to make sure there’s nothing, alright?”
He can see in his periphery the man going through a wild set of conflicting emotions, only to settle into a defeated expression “Alright… Just, I was uhn… Canning some food. Can you at least spare my dignity somewhat and let me clean up?”
“Sure man, it’s not urgent” he shrugs. As Orran heads back inside he looks back at the car, where Keya is still sitting. Then he looks back at Orran’s door. Something isn’t adding up, and that something is his boss’ behavior.
There is some noise from inside for a while until Orran returns “Alright, got my machinery packed, c’mon in” he mentions before waving him in.
There’s a certain aesthetic clash heading inside, it’s visible that Orran had put in effort into adding in the colors and signs of his people into a venlil residence, but the apparent lack of capacity (or funds) to really change the foundations of it meant a lot of the structure was still that of a normal venlil home.
Still, the walls had been decorated to look like they’re made of wooden planks on the inside with the actual materials only visible near things such as power sockets. The living room itself was decorated in a lightly distressing manner with effectively a circle of couches on slightly raised platforms around a central table, the television has been set up on it with a pivoting base. It looked like someone had repurposed a firepit, or rather the entire setup was designed to evoke the look of a firepit.
There was what looked like, initially, a cloth hanger near the door, but on second look what it really held was a very long string of beads- The way they were strung around it made him imagine Orran wearing those very much like a scarf which also bound around his wrists.
On the wall in the far end was something that looked like a banner, though it was best described as an unframed painting with a tougher canvas. It depicted a distant view of a town in some sandy plateau, the center of the picture was bright and colorful and clearly in the morning but at the sides one could see two long-tailed animals making their way to the center where the town resides, behind them the image was dark and stars could be seen in the sky. The way the nighttime emanated from the creatures it seemed more like they were dragging the curtains of night with their tails. Shaking his head, Santos forces himself to stop ogling Orran’s things and starts looking around.
He wasn’t, sincerely, being serious about this. But not only was this whole song and dance a necessity, but his earlier words WERE true. Just had to check for obvious signs of dangerous things. So a quick cursory glance under the couches, a short moment in the kitchen whose fridge’s scratches still weren’t repaired- Santos stops for a second more staring at the scratch marks on the fridge. He looks at Orran who’s following him, who looks confused. No, this man was not that stupid, he trusted him enough.
Still, that meant he’d have to pay more attention now. Respectfully, without actually touching anything, he continues a visual inspection towards the other side of the house. A short corridor with the doors to the bedroom and bathroom. He passes by the bedroom and stops in front of the closed bathroom door. He sighs and kneels down in front of it.
“What is it?” Orran says behind him
What is it, is that he had heard something “Just… Let me check…” he gently taps the door. And he hears the noise again, light scratching. It stops for a moment, and then he taps the door again, causing them to start for a moment again. He looks back to the frozen yotul, who was apparently actually that stupid “Set ‘em loose if you would?”
Orran doesn’t respond, he just stays there “Look, man. At the very least trust in the fact I’m a human? Not a fan of using my species as a bargaining tool but I think it’s actually relevant here?” Santos stands up again and starts heading to the living room.
He waits patiently for a while, until Orran finally arrives. A small little beast threads through his feet as he walks, not unlike a cat that is doing their best to get kicked, it is indeed a small quadruped with great agility, not only that it has a distinctive striped dark blue coat that is so deep it could be mistaken for black as well as a tail about as long as it’s torso. It’s not a beast Santos recognizes, other than from the painting in the wall, so at least he can’t blame his own kind for this problem. He looks up and sees Orran has another one in his arms, this one looking much more calm and gentle.
Santos rubs his eyes “Really, Orran? You, of all people” he sighs “Come on, not to be racist here but I’d expect a yotul, no, a yotul ecologist to know better.” he waves at the man’s beasts “Did you really bring exotic pets to another planet?! No, not another country, another planet?” he sighs “What even are those?”
“Nightweaver hensa” says a soft voice from behind him, he turns around to see that Keya had finally arrived “An endangered species native to Leirn, called like that after a legend that they were the ones who’d drag the veil of night over the scorching sun” she sounds mostly like herself, but he can feel a flatness creeping up in her delivery.
Santos stares at her for a moment, looks back at Orran with a piercing stare, then slowly lowers his eyes to the hensa he’s carrying “Endangered animals? Are you-” but a light sound draws his attention back to Keya. She simply taps a place in her chest, the motion confuses him for a moment until he looks down at himself. Where she tapped is exactly where the insignia of the exterminator’s guild is in his uniform. He starts exhaling air slowly as he sits down on a couch “Are. You. Fucking. Kidding. Me.”
He looks at Orran protectively holding his pet, looking terrified. The first time he’s seen the man look afraid. He looks down, and notices one of the two hensa had walked up to him. He notices in his periphery Orran flinches when he offers his hand for the feline-like to sniff “Plausible deniability” he says.
When nobody else says anything, he continues “I thought it was weird she made me get inside on my own before her. I am, of course, human. Some things are expected out of us, I’m sure a big fuss is expected out of me over a pet” when the alien feline seems confident enough, it gives his finger a gentle nip and puts its entire head on his hand “So just in case we don’t have any protocol about how to deal with this situation, she can pretend whatever happens is because of me”
He gently caresses the little beast “I thought it was weird you had personally deprioritized fifty eight calls” the tone is not quite accusatory
“He quite clearly had them under control, there was no need to do anything about it” Keya says as if it was the most normal thing
“Why now?”
Keya gently sways her tail “I got tired of it. After the last few paws I don’t think I have the energy to deal with this anymore” it made sense, he knew she had a limit to her emotional energy.
Orran slowly tilts his head to look at Keya “Wait… You’ve known about them?”
She gives him an affirmative ear flick “I even know they’re Nightweavers. They were already an endangered breed before your first contact, for all I know they’re the last two living Nightweavers”
At that, Santos focuses on the one that Orran is holding… Something about it… It’s a she “A breeding pair” this causes the yotul to snap his focus on him “You brought a breeding pair. It would be bad enough if they were just pets, maybe they’d be neutered and the worst damage they’d do would be for however long those fluffball live, but you’re looking at increasing the population”
He sighs “Orran… You know this will cause a disaster, don’t you? Do I need to tell you about the extinction level events that were every goddamn invasive species on Earth? Do I need to tell you the number of species gone extinct because of our cats?” he takes a deep breath “Actually, no, I don’t think I need to. You don’t actually care, do you?” he continues to gently caress the overly-affectionate little feline that at this point had jumped on his lap and burrowed itself under his shirt “Not only you don’t care… Any collateral you cause is probably just rightful vengeance for you is it?”
“It’s not like that!” the yotul shouts “I… I was breeder back home, okay? I wasn’t a farmer, I was a hensa breeder” he thumps his tail on the ground in anger “You weren’t there… You weren’t there to watch what they did to my… When I had a chance to run away and… And save some of them. I just grabbed who I could and just ran.” he holds the pregnant female a little bit tighter “I wasn’t planning on… Anything. I wasn’t planning, I wasn’t thinking… I… I wound up here, eventually…”
Santos brings down his other hand to scratch the little alien kitten. He takes a moment to just take in the little beast, whatever ecological niche it filled had to be infinitely similar to that of cats to be so similar yet so different. The tail movements were so different, a lot more energetic, a lot more in general, made sense since their owners had tails too, they probably could read each other much better. And it seemed to enjoy getting squished for some reason, he wondered why. He had all of those wonders and thoughts while he tried to not think about what he’d have to do.
Those hensa couldn’t stay here. Maybe, a very wild maybe, if they were neutered they could. But those were pretty much for breeding and of a particularly endangered kind as well, so that was out of the picture. Of course, those two space felines would also need to be cared for, they were an endangered species so that was non-negotiable. The UN had some measures for dealing with terran animals in this planet, from relocation to shelters to even a few approved areas they could live in, but they only dealt in terran animals not leirnian animals.
At this point his thoughts are interrupted by Keya’s voice “I don’t care who, anyone that can help is enough” he looks up at her, she has her holopad firmly clenched in her hands and her right eye focused directly on it.
She’s on a call.
---
And here we have it, we meet the two little disasters-to-be while the precinct chief throws their human into the fire as a possible scapegoat for any possible crazy plan they might have to resort to. And in fact, said crazy plan seems to involve a desperate plea over the phone.
Also, I had a bit of fun trying to thinking what Orran's house might be like, and somewhere along the line I got this weird thought: They're certainly not innocent of or about colonialism, so wouldn't the displaced natives of their own world at least feel a tiny bit of vindication watching their own conquerors get conquered in turn? Doesn't make things better but the irony of it all must be sweet.
Edit: FFS. Reddit, LET ME EDIT TITLES

For a while, I thought of this OC in Fairy Tail's canon with some adjustment towards the future arcs. This take place after the Tenrou Island arc. Well, here he is:
Name: Razi Bharx.
Age: 14.
Gender: Male.
Appearance: https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/1066835543163404350/1066846774305767585/razi.jpg?width=669&height=422
Personality: He is very active, energetic and fun-loving. Razi is really gluttonous and will eat just about anything/everything that's edible. He's also shy around huge crowds, due to years of nonstop abuse because of his wolf features and is always trying to hide his sadness with a smile. He absolutely hates being called a dog, despite showing the traits of one (scratching his ears with his feet, hanging his head and tongue out of vehicle windows & etc). He's known to show less anger, in fear of becoming the monster a certain spell wants him to become; in fact, Razi outright tries to force himself to be happy no matter what because he believes that this dark side takes over if he even senses negative emotions impacting. Razi has a big fear of the cold and steers clear of anyone with Magic relating to it, Gray included. He's often called the most harmless member of Fairy Tail because of his unwillingness to harm people.
Likes: Food and his found family.
Dislikes: Winter and his own strength.
Strengths: Razi's speed is doubled when he's on all fours. His sense of smell and hearing are more higher than the average human's, next to the qualities of a Dragon Slayer.
Weaknesses: He's very literate, barely able to spell his name. His hesitance to strike harder makes him an easy target in combat.
History: A powerful demon named Xyroque rebelled against his creator and left to places unknown. He came across a remote village where he met a woman named Shauna. Acceptance came slowly, but they were warming up to him until he and Shauna fell in love. The year came when they have a half-breed baby and christened him "Razi". One night, a wicked priest came to his homeland and ordered genocide. Xyrouqe stayed behind to fend them off before telling his wife to take their son and run away. Unable to shake off the invaders, Shauna made the ultimate sacrifice; she silently hid her son in an empty barrel and, after a tearfully heart-breaking goodbye, she ran away before luring away the wicked leader and was hunted down. The barrel he was in got delivered to an orphanage, where he became the social punching bag. As a 7 year old, Razi left and barely survived the streets for a month. He was nearly starving to death because he lacks the courage to even steal, which gets even worse when nobody pitied him because of his canine features and is sadly jealous of the other children with their happy families. When the people went as far as to try and murder him that resulted in a fatal scar to the neck, Razi snapped; he painfully transformed into a monstrous, humanoid wolf and slaughtered many people, ransacked houses and laid waste to the town for a second month. Many guilds tried to take him down, but he was unstoppable until Gildarts from Fairy Tail pitched in and took care of it with ease. Before he can finish the job, however, he saw the monster turn back into a scared and malnourished child and throw away the offered money, disgusted that the people wanted him to kill a child. On his way to Fairy Tail, he carried Razi there and left him in the medic ward before leaving for the S-Class Trials. His coma lasted until Tenrou Island was destroyed by Acnologia, wondering why all these people are crying. For the 7 year timeskip, Razi was the only one who kept Fairy Tail going when they had no hope left, especially now that a Dark Guild called "Weasel Breath" took over their original building and hosted wild parties every night. The rest is history when the main muscle members return and he becomes a new member of Team Natsu.
Magic: Moonlight Magic; Razi has the power to create illuminating energy harnessed by the moon itself. If it's a sunny day, then his magic powers is halved.
Spells-
Midnight Palm; Razi's left and/or right arm and hand turns black and white as he punches the target.
Dark Hunter Howl; Razi unleashes a super sonic howl in the form of a black tornado. The louder his voice, the more powerful this spell is.
Ninja Attack; Razi summons multiple clones of himself from his shadow. Problem is that each clone has their own personality.
Dizzy Dust; Razi throws a star-coated cloud of dust at the opponent, instantly making them fall asleep.
Solar Eclipse; Razi summons a decoy moon that covers the sun. This is pretty useful to double his magic, but useless if the real moon is already out.
Shadow Sneak; Razi can phase/teleport into the shadows for sneaking purposes or mischief. It's also useful for spying.
Lunar Slash; Razi's tail turns white and curves like a crescent moon with a few spiky tips before he flips and slashes the target.
Phantom Whip; Razi summons all the surrounding shadows to create a large black whip coming out of his arm. This also works with both arms.
Pitch Thought; Razi can form a black star-ridden aura around himself that creates whatever he thinks of. This spell can only work if Razi keeps his eyes closed, so he must rely on his other senses.
Moon Shine; Razi summons a bright flash that momentarily blinds the opposition.
Fury of the Night; Razi only uses this spell as a last resort because he has no control over it as it painfully transforms him into a savage werewolf-like monster entitled The Lunarthrope" that will attack anyone who comes near him. His mentality is reverted to that of a violent monster and won't stop unleash all is slaughtered around him. The only way to pacify this spell is if someone uses Magic that can cancel other Magic or if then can manage to get through to Razi inside.

https://brewyork.substack.com/p/off-field-disappointment?utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web
For nearly a decade, Citi Field offered a great craft beer selection, for a major mainstream venue. In particular, Aramark, on behalf of the Mets, operated a couple kiosks called Empire State Craft, which featured a rotation of 16-oz cans exclusively from New York microbreweries like Newburgh Brewing, LIC Beer Project, Bronx Brewery, Gun Hill Brewing, Five Boroughs Brewing, Queens Brewing, Ithaca Beer Co, and Oyster Bay Brewing.
Beginning in this 2023 season, the Empire State Craft kiosks are no more, replaced with branded stands of Coney Island and Dogfish Head (both owned by Sam Adams) and Montauk (sold to a weed company last year). Of course, macro sponsor MillerCoors' brands are widely available throughout the stadium, including Blue Moon and hard seltzers.
According to the Dining Guide, there are 5 New York craft breweries available, though no locations listed:

• Brooklyn Brewery
• Sloop Brewing
• Garvies Point Brewery
• Threes Brewing
• Flagship Brewing

​

https://brewyork.substack.com/p/off-field-disappointment?utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web
For nearly a decade, Citi Field offered a great craft beer selection, for a major mainstream venue. In particular, Aramark, on behalf of the Mets, operated a couple kiosks called Empire State Craft, which featured a rotation of 16-oz cans exclusively from New York microbreweries like Newburgh Brewing, LIC Beer Project, Bronx Brewery, Gun Hill Brewing, Five Boroughs Brewing, Queens Brewing, Ithaca Beer Co, and Oyster Bay Brewing.
Beginning in this 2023 season, the Empire State Craft kiosks are no more, replaced with branded stands of Coney Island and Dogfish Head (both owned by Sam Adams) and Montauk (sold to a weed company last year). Of course, macro sponsor MillerCoors' brands are widely available throughout the stadium, including Blue Moon and hard seltzers.
According to the Dining Guide, there are 5 New York craft breweries available, though no locations listed:

• Brooklyn Brewery
• Sloop Brewing
• Garvies Point Brewery
• Threes Brewing
• Flagship Brewing

Blinken Dismisses Calls for a Ceasefire, Says US Must Build Up Ukraine’s Military
The Secretary of State called for Washington to continue to put militarism before diplomacy
by Kyle Anzalone - Posted onJune 2, 2023
The US will focus its efforts on arming Ukraine and not attempting to bring the war to a negotiated settlement, America’s top diplomat said. Secretary of State Antony Blinken laid out a plan to massively expand Kiev’s military before talks begin.
In a speech delivered in Finland on Friday, Blinken stated, "The United States – together with our allies and partners – is firmly committed to supporting Ukraine’s defense today, tomorrow, for as long as it takes." He continued, "We believe the prerequisite for meaningful diplomacy and real peace is a stronger Ukraine, capable of deterring and defending against any future aggression."
Blinken dismissed the idea of even a temporary pause in the fighting. "Some countries will call for a ceasefire. And on the surface, that sounds sensible – attractive, even. After all, who doesn’t want warring parties to lay down their arms? Who doesn’t want the killing to stop?" He said. "But a ceasefire that simply freezes current lines in place and enables Putin to consolidate control over the territory he’s seized…It would legitimize Russia’s land grab. It would reward the aggressor and punish the victim."
The Secretary of State offered an ambitious vision of Kiev’s future military capabilities. "America and our allies are helping meet Ukraine’s needs on the current battlefield while developing a force that can deter and defend against aggression for years to come." He added, "That means helping build a Ukrainian military of the future, with long-term funding, a strong air force centered on modern combat aircraft, an integrated air and missile defense network, advanced tanks and armored vehicles, national capacity to produce ammunition, and the training and support to keep forces and equipment combat-ready."
It is unclear how long it would take to build the deterrence force envisioned by Blinken. American arms stockpiles are dwindling as Washington attempts to transfer Kiev enough military equipment to keep its army fighting. The US additionally has plans to significantly increase arms transfers to Taiwan.
Blinken claimed, "Our support for Ukraine hasn’t weakened our capabilities to meet potential threats from China or anywhere else – it’s strengthened them." In November, the Wall Street Journal reported, "US government and congressional officials fear the conflict in Ukraine is exacerbating a nearly $19 billion backlog of weapons bound for Taiwan, further delaying efforts to arm the island."
Additionally, the White House may not have the support it needs in the Capitol for such a massive military buildup in Ukraine. Blinken asserted that "in America, this support is bipartisan." However, at the beginning of May, Rep. Michael McCaul (R-TX), chairman of the House Foreign Affairs Committee, said future support for Ukraine would be contingent on success in Kiev’s long-planned counteroffensive.
Since McCaul’s statement, Ukraine has slowly lost more territory to Russian forces, including Bakhmut. Zelensky committed endless resources to the city in a months-long battle despite the advice from his Western backers. The White House is now preparing for the counteroffensive to fail.
Washington’s strategy, as laid out by Blinken, calls for arming Ukraine and weakening Russia. "Russia is significantly worse off today than it was before its full-scale invasion of Ukraine – militarily, economically, geopolitically," he stated, adding, "President Putin has diminished Russian influence on every continent."
However, Gen. Christopher Cavoli, the commander of US European Command, told Congress in April that Moscow’s ground forces are "bigger today" than before Moscow launched its invasion of Ukraine last year.
While the White House has attempted to isolate the Kremlin, Moscow has weathered Western sanctions by developing relationships in the global south. On Friday, Russian officials met with prospective members of the BRICS coalition, including Saudi Arabia, Iran and the UAE. In September, Iran’s President Ebrahim Raisi said in a meeting with Putin, "The relationship between countries that are sanctioned by the US, such as Iran, Russia or other countries, can overcome many problems and issues and make them stronger."
Blinken justified the Biden administration’s commitment to a militaristic approach by claiming the White House attempted to engage the Kremlin in meaningful diplomacy before the invasion of Ukraine. "President Biden told President Putin that we were prepared to discuss our mutual security concerns – a message that I reaffirmed repeatedly – including in person, with Foreign Minister Lavrov." The Secretary of State continued, "We offered written proposals to reduce tensions. Together with our allies and partners, we used every forum to try to prevent war, from the NATO-Russia Council to the OSCE, from the UN to our direct channels."
In April 2022, Biden administration official Derek Chollet admitted that the White House refused to negotiate with the Krem[l]in on Putin’s core concern, Ukraine becoming a member of NATO. "We made clear to the Russians that we were willing to talk to them on issues that we thought were genuine concerns," Chollet said, adding that the administration didn’t think that "the future of Ukraine" was one of those issues and that its potential NATO membership was a "non-issue."

https://news.antiwar.com/2023/06/02/blinken-dismisses-calls-for-a-ceasefire-says-us-must-build-up-ukraines-military/

For years, I've run mimics as a standard ambush-predator: they hide near loot, wait for something to get close enough for it to use it's 'Adhesive' trait, and then jump out (usually as a chest-with-teeth) to nom away some HP before getting jumped and killed in a 5-to-1 fight. All good fun.
This campaign, I ran that routine on a loot-stash and after the fight one of my players has said his character was kinda traumatized by it and wanted to develop a phobia or tic where he was checking all kinds of random shit to see if it was a mimic. I tell him "Cool!" and make a note before moving on.
We get a couple sessions where he stabs a table every now and then before we come to last night
This is the session things changed. The party is shipwrecked and looking for a way off the island and have recently found an old derelict anchored within a cave. JACKPOT! (they think) and go abord to explore. They poke through some rooms (paranoia-PC has literally forgotten to check anything) when BOOM the-chests-a-mimic roll for initiative
However, this time, instead of describing the chest growing teeth and nomming him, I've described it kind of transforming back into it's ooze form as it adheres to the PC and tries to consume him, the party strikes back. This is all well and good until mid-fight when the PC (badly wounded) breaks the grapple, disengages and books it.
***Now the mimic is cornered in the room, and I've already described it as losing it's 'Object Form' and as I look at the statblock, I realize that he loses the 'Adhesive' trait when it's not an object....this also means it has no way to gain advantage on it's attacks and it very likely proper-fucked in short order. I also note that, while the Mimic has -1 to INT, it's actually got decent WIS.....so instead of fighting and outnumbered fight-to-the-death I have the mimic FLEE. He slinks out a window to god-knows-where and the PC who chases sees him disappear into a porthole on another deck.
What resulted was one of the funnest sessions I've DM'd for, as the entire party goes full Mimic-Hunter and is stabbing mattresses and shooting wine-racks as the mimic is kiting the party, getting 1 attack off and then running into another room if it cant make a grapple and transforming into something else. They finally corner and kill it in the cargo-hold, but in the process have now explored the entire ship.
None of this would have happened if I had just kept with my standard routine of 'The mimic attacks while in its object form' instead of 'The mimic transforms while attacking'

I've been looking at whether or not we can measure good and evil in amongst other projects around the multiplicity of different wills that are at play within our daily lives (Will to Power, Will to Create, Will to Responsibility, Will to Meaning etc), and have been watching with concern all the Governments around the world getting us ready for a Central Bank Digital Currency, providing the illusion of public input, but seemingly moving towards the CBDC system as a economic system of last resort.
Me:

What happens if our economy collapses, we see 50% or more unemployment due to both economics, and automation/AI factors? Individuals are no longer able to sustain themselves, and governments have gotten themselves into so much debt that they cannot afford any social programs, nor the upkeep of law enforcement to ensure individual safety. Could any of your above examples work in the world I've proposed?

ChatGPT:

In the event of a large-scale economic collapse and subsequent high unemployment, traditional mechanisms of welfare and social stability may indeed become strained or even non-functional. In such a scenario, different or supplemental approaches might be necessary to uphold the moral laws we've outlined. Here are a few possibilities:

1. **Universal Basic Income (UBI):** If traditional employment is no longer a viable way for a significant proportion of the population to support themselves, governments or a consortium of nations might implement a universal basic income program. This would provide everyone with a basic level of financial support, regardless of employment status. Although it might seem contradictory in a situation where government debt is high, some economists argue that UBI can stimulate economic activity, thereby increasing the government's revenue in the long run.
   
2. **Skill Transition Programs:** Massive unemployment due to automation suggests that many jobs have become obsolete. In response, we could establish widespread education and training programs to help people transition into roles that are still needed. This could include jobs that require human interaction, creativity, emotional intelligence, or the oversight of automated systems.
   
3. **Community-Based Solutions:** If governmental support is limited, local communities might need to band together to provide mutual aid. This could involve sharing resources, skills, and labor within the community. It's a form of applied interconnectedness and interdependency.
   
4. **Barter and Local Currency Systems:** In an economic collapse, traditional money might lose some or all of its value. In response, people could revert to barter systems or create local currencies to facilitate trade.
   
5. **Decentralized/Distributed Governance:** If centralized governments are unable to maintain stability, decentralized models of governance could emerge. These could leverage technology (like blockchain) to enable decision-making at a more local level.
   
6. **Open Source and Sharing Economy:** With the advancement of AI and automation, the cost of many goods and services might drop drastically. This could facilitate a more expansive sharing economy or increase the feasibility of open-source solutions to various problems.
   

Remember, these are merely possible solutions in such a scenario. The practicality and success of these approaches would depend on a multitude of factors, and they would likely need to be tailored to the specific circumstances of different regions and communities. Furthermore, such radical changes would inevitably present challenges and issues of their own that would need to be addressed.

​
Me:

You have not understood the implications of what I've said. How can a government employ a UBI when they are broke? How does an economic system work when Governments around the world cannot pay back their debts and are bankrupt? At the same time the advent of AI and Automation has meant that only the highest skilled jobs remain, so the top 10-20% of intelligence are the one's who are participating. I'd like you to try and give me a creative answer to this problem as it is likely in the near future.

ChatGPT:

Indeed, I apologize for misunderstanding the depth of the economic collapse and governmental bankruptcy in your hypothetical scenario. It's an extreme situation that would pose unprecedented challenges. In such a case, the primary issue to tackle is survival and meeting the basic needs of the population. Here are some creative approaches that might be considered:

1. **Resource-Based Economy:** In a resource-based economy, goods and services are available without the need for money, credits, barter, or any other system of debt or servitude. The planet's resources would be held as the common heritage of all Earth's inhabitants, and access to basic necessities would be a given. The Venus Project is an example of such an initiative.
   
2. **Decentralized Autonomous Organizations (DAOs):** DAOs are organizations represented by rules encoded as a computer program that is transparent, controlled by the organization members, and not influenced by a central government. DAOs could be used to create a new kind of economic and social structure within a community or globally, where the rules are applied equally to everyone.
   
3. **Communal Living & Resource Sharing:** Local communities might have to band together in collectives to share resources and labor. People could pool their skills to ensure that everyone's basic needs are met. For example, someone who knows how to garden could grow food, while someone with medical training could provide healthcare.
   
4. **Direct Resource Exchange:** In a world where traditional money has lost its value, people might revert to direct resource exchanges. For instance, someone might trade a basket of vegetables they've grown for a pair of shoes someone else has made.
   
5. **Reintroduction of the Commons:** Traditionally, 'commons' referred to resources that belonged to all members of a society and could be used by anyone. Reestablishing commons could help ensure everyone has access to basic resources. These might include community gardens, shared tools and equipment, public spaces, and even knowledge resources.
   
6. **AI and Automation for All:** In this scenario, AI and automation technologies have largely replaced human labor. If these technologies could be collectively owned and controlled, they could be used to provide for everyone's basic needs. However, this would require a radical redistribution of wealth and power.
   
7. **Widespread Education and Cognitive Enhancement:** To address the issue of only the highest-skilled jobs remaining, efforts could be made to raise the skill level of the population. This could involve not only traditional education but also the development and use of cognitive enhancement technologies.
   

Remember, these are potential approaches to a hypothetical scenario, and implementing them would involve significant challenges and complexities. The specific path forward would depend on many factors, including the existing social and economic structures, the available resources, and the will of the people involved. In a real-world scenario, it's likely that a mix of strategies would be needed.

​
Me:

You've done well within this hypothetical scenario, could you explore how a potentially corrupt group of individuals who want to maintain centralized control during this scenario through the introduction of a global central bank digital currency might strategize in preparation for a global economic collapse?

ChatGPT:

In a scenario where a potentially corrupt group of individuals seeks to maintain centralized control during a global economic collapse through the introduction of a Global Central Bank Digital Currency (CBDC), their strategic preparation might look something like this:

1. **Control over Money Supply:** First, they would need to establish an international organization or use an existing one (like the International Monetary Fund) to administer the global CBDC. This body would control the production and distribution of the digital currency, effectively giving them control over the global money supply.
   
2. **Influence Legislation and Regulations:** They would need to ensure that legislation and regulations in all major economies support the use of their global CBDC. This could involve lobbying, negotiation, or potentially more covert tactics depending on the level of corruption assumed.
   
3. **Infrastructure Development:** A global CBDC would require a significant technology infrastructure. This group would need to either develop this infrastructure themselves or ensure that it's developed according to their specifications. It's likely they would use blockchain technology or a similar distributed ledger system.
   
4. **Public Relations and Trust Building:** Even in a crisis, people might be hesitant to adopt a new currency, particularly one controlled by a single centralized group. A broad public relations campaign would likely be necessary to build trust and acceptance. They might also need to offer incentives for adoption, particularly to businesses and other key stakeholders.
   
5. **Economic Manipulation:** In the lead-up to the collapse, this group could use their control over the global CBDC to influence economic conditions. For example, they could manipulate inflation or interest rates to weaken existing economies and make the transition to their CBDC more attractive.
   
6. **Surveillance and Control:** One of the potential dangers of a CBDC is that it could be used for surveillance and control. Every transaction could potentially be tracked and traced, giving this group vast amounts of information about people's behaviors, habits, and networks. This could be used for everything from enforcing tax compliance to suppressing dissent.
   

While it's possible to envision such a scenario, it's important to note that it would face significant challenges and resistance. For one, countries with strong economies might be hesitant to cede control over their monetary policy to an international body. Furthermore, the use of a CBDC for surveillance and control would likely raise serious privacy and human rights concerns. Public acceptance of such a system would depend heavily on the specifics of how it's implemented and the perceived alternatives.

​
Me:

Assuming we do come to an economic collapse scenario, and people become desperate due to lack of access to food, water, houseing, essentially Maslow's Hierarchy of needs is completely destabilized. How likely would it be for a program like this to be rolled out? And would there be any ways to disrupt the Global CBDC system once it's in place?

ChatGPT:

In a scenario where an economic collapse has destabilized basic access to necessities, desperation could certainly make people more open to solutions they might otherwise reject. A Global Central Bank Digital Currency (CBDC) could be presented as a means to stabilize the economy and ensure basic needs are met, which may make it more appealing despite potential issues of privacy and centralized control.
However, the likelihood of such a system being rolled out successfully in the midst of an economic collapse would depend on a variety of factors:

1. **International Cooperation:** Implementing a Global CBDC would require unprecedented cooperation between nations. In a crisis situation, some nations might prioritize national solutions over global ones, making agreement on a global currency difficult.
   
2. **Infrastructure:** Building the necessary infrastructure for a Global CBDC could be challenging in a stable economic environment, let alone during a global economic collapse.
   
3. **Trust:** In a time of crisis, trust in institutions can be severely eroded. Convincing people to adopt a new, global currency controlled by a centralized group would require a significant amount of trust-building.
   
4. **Efficiency:** The speed at which a Global CBDC could be implemented would be crucial. In a crisis situation, slower solutions might be overlooked in favor of quicker, albeit temporary, fixes.
   

As for disruption, once a Global CBDC is in place, it would be challenging but not impossible to disrupt. Potential strategies for disruption could include:

1. **Decentralized Alternatives:** The rise of decentralized cryptocurrencies could provide an alternative to a Global CBDC. If enough people were to adopt a decentralized currency, it could undermine the dominance of the Global CBDC.
   
2. **Technological Disruption:** Cyberattacks could potentially disrupt the infrastructure supporting the Global CBDC. However, this would likely cause widespread economic harm and might not be seen as a desirable strategy.
   
3. **Legal Challenges:** If the implementation of the Global CBDC violates laws or human rights, legal challenges could potentially be used to disrupt its operation.
   
4. **Public Opposition:** Widespread public opposition, including protests, strikes, and civil disobedience, could potentially disrupt the operation of a Global CBDC.
   

While these disruption strategies could potentially be employed, it's important to note that they would also come with significant challenges and potential drawbacks. The ultimate effectiveness of any strategy would depend on the specific circumstances and the degree of coordination and determination among those seeking to disrupt the system.

Basically just the title.
Roster 176 only 1 wealth rune. I have a job, can’t make lagoon island and when I do during holidays I can’t get the damn wealth rune. Omnium star never dropped for me from Moake so I had to do the Unas quest for a month to get my last omnium star for legendary. I think there should be another way of getting these things since many characters/their engraving playstyles revolve around wealth runes. I’m fine with shit honing odds, weapon quality odds, stones, bracelets, gems, etc. since these are a feature necessary to keep the player engaged to up their item level/dmg and increase gold income and also experiencing new content but I cannot fathom how nearly every class requires wealth runes if they’re going a spec build and the wall is kept by RNG
Swiftness is easier, sure. But is that seriously the payoff for not running as much wealth runes as its spec variant? If a player has honed their characters up, rolled their weapon qualities, stones, bought accessories, and has the required gems to play their class and bought legendary engravings 5x3 shouldn’t that have been the “wall” in this scenario? Why is it that the spec counterpart of a class be prevented by such horrid RNG and collection experience? Congrats to you all for getting your wealth runes but damn just to acquire them is probably the worst thing I’ve ever seen in a video game to vertically progress a character’s playstyle and build.

"Whoa!"
As Doctor Neo Cortex was building an army of mutants to conquer the world with, he needed a general. One particular experiment caught his eye, a bandicoot that he would give the name Crashworth Cortex the First. But when it came time to brainwash the marsupial into being a leader, the machine malfunctioned, the bandicoot rejected. Escaping from his creator's clutches, Crash woke up on a beach on a nearby island, immediately setting off to rescue the similarly mutated Tawna. While he would lose contact with Tawna and instead spend his time with his sister Coco, Crash would constantly find himself butting heads with Cortex and his schemes. While he may not be the smartest, his determined athleticism ensured he would find all the crystals, gems, or any other object needed to stop any schemes of world domination.

Legend

Strength

Striking - Spinning / Sliding

• Smashes crates and sends enemies flying through the level¹
  • These enemies can include giant alligators³ and lions^N3
  • Hits enemies into a large metal fan to break it^N2
• In a Die-O-Rama, breaks a tree and causes it to fall on him^TTR
• Breaks a stone pillar^T
• Breaks laser generators⁴
• Knocks back scientists with a metal shield^N2
• Sends smaller foes flying^Sky-A
• Sends a robot flying back to damage machines and speakers⁴
• Hits away stone crates^CB
• Spins around large devices with a platform on one side and a net of crates on the other by spinning said net^T
• Skims rocks on water by spinning them^T
• Sends a boulder over a stream of lava to smash against an enemy¹
  • N-Sane Trilogy version^N1

Striking - Other

• Sends smaller foes flying with punches and kicks^Sky-A
• While brawling with Cortex, breaks through a wooden barrier^T
• Smashes Cortex through reinforced crates^T
• Beats up and breaks metal crates^CotT
• Forces open a trap door with a body slam²
• Breaks reinforced crates with a body slam²
• With an ability, creates a shockwave with his body slams that can destroy reinforced crates³
• Hits with a hammer hard enough to make a small shockwave^CB

Lifting / Throwing

• Lifts an dumbbell with ice weights^RR
• Lifts a dumbbell with stone weights^RR
• Lifts a dumbbell with larger stone weights^RR
• Spins while holding onto Cortex and a power crystal^T
• Holds Crunch over his head while slamming him to the ground^MOM
• Throws Cortex over a gap^T
• Throws Cortex into the mouth of a stone statue^T
• Lifts and throws stone crates^CB
• Throws a device an incredible distance to knock a cage off of a blimp^CotT
• Tears up a tree he's chained to^M2

Other

• Throws wumpa fruit at N. Gin's mech to damage and break different parts^N2
• Leaps around a room^Sky-A

Durability

Blunt Force

• Has an extended brawl with Neo Cortex^T
• Smashes through a wooden barrier while riding a mine cart^W
• Sent flying across a street and into a store window^A
• Struck by a ten ton and hundred ton weight^M2
• Hit and run over by a train^BB

Falling

• Drops a large distance¹
• Jumps off of a waterfall^CotT-DS
• Drops into a cave^T
• Belly flops onto stone⁴
• Falls a large distance onto metal^T
• Falls off a cliff into shallow mud⁴
• Thrown a huge distance through the air^T
• Is in a snowball as it drops off a cliff to smash Dingodile's house^T
• Drops out of Neo Cortex's tower and wakes up the following morning, washed up on the beach of another island¹

Explosive

• Can have their kart blown into the air^CTR
• Launched through the air by three crates blowing up beneath him^M
• Blown through the air by a mass of TNT crates^T
• Is in Cortex's lair as it blows up and emerges seemingly unharmed from rubble^M

Other

• Can be crushed flat in a kart^NK
• Electrocuted so his skeleton can be seen for a duration¹
• Electrocuted into ashes before reforming in the same cutscene^MOM
• Is in a space station as it falls to Earth, crashing into a cliff before landing, with Crash appearing unharmed from the experience. While falling he was holding Aku-Aku in front of him, but it's unlikely this provided him any particular protection^MOM

Speed

• Avoids Papu Papu's swings¹
• Evades blasts in a car while Cortex is chasing them in his own^TTR
• Dodges a freeze ray after it was fired when Crunch couldn't react^CotT
• Keeps ahead of giant chasing animals, such as a triceratops³ and a dragon^W
• Rapidly punches a giant robot^Sky-A

Skill

• Can wall jump^CotT
• Wall runs⁴
• Grinds on rails⁴
• Using flames and removing his trousers, distracts Papu Papu to get behind him for an attack¹

Jacking

In Crash of the Titans and Mind over Mutant, Crash can take over foes, mostly large creatures mutated by a substance called mojo called titans, by stunning them and placing Aku-Aku on their face.
Full Titan RT
General

• After stunning a titan, Crash can put Aku-Aku on their face and control them^CotC
• Titans collapse after being unmasked^CotC
• Jacking works on non-titans, with older mutated creatures like Dingodile and regular people like Neo Cortex being jacked^CotT-GBA

Notable Titan Feats

• All titans can break apart masses of stone^CotT and huge stone walls^MOM
• Scorporilla creates a fissure in the ground with its tail
• Spike can send a boulder flying into a huge tree, felling it^MOM-DS
• Ratcicle instantly freezes and shatters a massive amount of ice^MOM
• Grimly can seemingly slow time around it while moving normally^MOM

Other Abilities

Unlocked

• Double jumps³
• Rocket Jump propels him high into the air^NT
• Can spin for longer durations with the Death Tornado ability, using this to glide through the air³
• Can throw around TNT crates and pull in enemies with his spins^Sky
• Slides large distances with the Super Slide^NT
• With one ability can sneak across lines of stable nitro crates without blowing them up^W
• After getting Speed Shoes, can dash through levels³
• A bazooka that shoots wumpa fruit to defeat enemies and break crates³

Other

• Spins so fast he flies through the air¹
• Glides over gaps with a different kind of spin^CotT
• Burrows into the ground while still being able to stick his legs up and spin them^N2

Masks

Aku-Aku
The spirit of an ancient witch doctor, Aku-Aku has been protecting Crash since his first adventure. Since then, he's also played the role of being the fount of knowledge, knowing whenever evil is occurring and how to stop it.
Full RT

• On breaking an Aku Aku crate, the mask follows Crash to protect him from an attack¹
  • Opening another Aku Aku crate strengthens him, allowing him to protect Crash from two attacks²
  • Opening a third causes Crash to wear the mask temporarily, rendering him invincible for the period¹ while smashing through crates, even reinforced ones³
• Crash skates down areas on Aku-Aku^CotT
  • Can create fire around him while being used like this^CotT-DS

Lani-Loli
The quantum mask of space, Lani-Loli is the first to be found in Crash 4 and takes the role of guide and exposition dealer for the adventure.

• Causes certain items to phase in and out of reality for Crash to be able to affect⁴
• When used by a machine, causes rows of tiles to phase out of reality⁴
• Can sense rifts in space and open them when not being rampantly created by N. Tropy's device, with this likely being applicable to the other quantum masks⁴

Akano
The quantum mask of matter.

• Strengthens spins to break reinforced crates⁴
  • Hits back a large mutated N. Brio⁴
  • These spins deflect green magic⁴
• Causes spins to last longer, providing a gliding effect over gaps⁴
• Is forced to empower a machine, causing it to spin while creating extra energy beams⁴
• Launched out of a machine by an explosion before falling to the ground and entering a dimensional rift⁴
• Is notably heavy⁴
  • Traps Cortex beneath himself⁴

Kupuna-Wa
The quantum mask of time.

• Notably slows down time while allowing Crash to move normally⁴
  • Allows Crash to use ice falling down waterfalls as platforms⁴
  • Like this Crash can touch nitro crates and have time to exit the blast radius before they blow up⁴
• When used by a machine, changes the speed of platforms disappearing and reappearing⁴
• Knows of all time, telling that there's a significant event happening in Crash and Coco's near futures⁴

Ika-Ika
The quantum mask of gravity.

• Flips gravity for Crash⁴
• On waking up, flips gravity for several people in front of him⁴
• When forced by a machine, causes the screen to flip upside down⁴

Karts

General

• Jumps up a ledge^CTR
• Drops down a large distance^CTR
  • Does so again^NK
• All karts can take hits that blow them into the air^CTR and crust them flat^NK
• Capable of giving themselves boosts by drifting^CTR
• Karts go faster when wumpa fruits are collected, and when ten are collected the items used are changed to be stronger^CTR
• In Nitro Kart, the karts were modified to be able to drive along walls and ceilings in certain areas^NK
• After driving alongside a teammate for a while, a Team Up meter fills and allows both racers to use unlimited items for a period on activation^NK

Items - Offensive
These are capable of forcing open a door in the original game and remake.^CTR-N

• Bombs which roll along the road in a straight line, exploding on contact^CTR
  • Fully powered bombs have a larger blast radius^CTR
  • These can be blown up early on command^CTR
• Homing missiles^CTR
  • When powered up they are faster with better tracking^CTR
• Creates an electric shockwave around them^NK3
• Releases a warp orb from Crash 3 that chases after the racer in first place, shocking everyone in their path^CTR
  • When powered up it tracks each racer in front of the user in sequence^CTR
• Releases a tornado which targets first place, throwing any racer it meets up into the air^NK

Items - Traps

• Drops an oil slick^NK2
• Beakers which cause anyone running into them to spin out^CTR-N
  • Turn from green to red at full power, adding an extra effect such as slowing down the kart that drives into them for a while^CTR-N
• Crates of TNT which anyone running into needs to hop rapidly to remove before it explodes^CTR-N
  • These change into nitro crates that explode instantly when powered up^CTR
• Ice mines trap foes in a block of ice^NK
  • When fully powered they give the kart ice physics for the duration^NK
• Static orbs short out circuits on karts, slowing foes down while changing their weapon^NK
  • At full power, they draw racers in and reverse their steering for a time^NK

Items - Other

• Shields which protect against any one hit^NK
  • Can be launched like a bomb, with the fully powered shield protecting indefinitely until hit or thrown^CTR
• Speed boosts^CTR
  • Last longer when powered up^CTR
  • Can be used to evade a missile^NK
• N. Tropy's Clocks spin out and slow down all opposing racers for a period^NK
• Call upon Aku-Aku to speed up the kart and render them invulnerable for a bit^CTR

Tag Team Racing Cars

• In Crash Tag Team Racing, all racer's vehicles can merge with each other and break apart again at will^TTR
• Can drive through tree-shaped targets^TTR
• Have a variety of weapons with each car combination being able to swap between two, which can include wumpa fruit launchers and magnetic blasts
  • Missiles
  • A machine gun
  • Electric shotgun blasts^TTR
• Can be rocket propelled^TTR
• Can launch items as large as pianos^TTR

Other Vehicles

Ground

• The atlasphere is a large orb which Crash rolls around in^W
  • Used to seemingly imbue rolling rocks with power for Aku Aku to use^W
  • Can jump in a cage shaped like an atlasphere⁴
• Mine carts^W
• A pogo stick^CB
• Crash's Jeep keeps ahead of a rhino stampede^W
• Motorbikes³
  • Smash through large wooden barriers^N3
• A hovercraft^CB
• Drives a tiny tank which can drop mines^CB
• A tank which shoots ammo which destroys other tanks with one shot and rebounds off of walls^RR
• A mech which has a fruit bazooka on the arm^W
  • Breaks reinforced crates by jumping on them^W
  • Runs away from an explosion^W
  • A variant of it has a water cannon which, when empowered by Aku-Aku, hurts Crunch imbued with the fire Elemental^W
• A boxing mech^BB
• At one point pilots Mecha-Bandicoot, a Neo Cortex creation that can shoot missiles and energy blasts^T
  • Has a chainsaw arm that finishes off another mech^T
  • Flies^T
• A device which can attract and repel balls to hit enemies with while moving side to side^RR
• Any given animal he jumps on the back of, from boars¹ to Neo Cortex^T

Flying

• A hang glider^CotT-GBA
• Biplanes which shoot bullets that destroy the engines of much larger planes³
• Crash's Glider can shoot down tornado generators^W
• The Firefly locks on and shoots missiles which sink ships on repeat hits^W
• The Copter-Pak^W
• Jetpacks²
  • Can come with an energy blaster that can take down a blimp with blasts^XS
• Uses a flying carpet which allows him to shoot magic blasts from his head^NT
• A spaceship which shoots energy beams to rapidly crumple and destroy parts of Cortex and Ripto's machine^RR
• A motorbike which flies through space^XS
  • Appears to quickly circle the Earth^XS
• Rides a bat^RR

Water

• A wakeboard^NT
• Surfboards with engines that allow him to boost through water²
• A turbo boosted inflatable ring^RR
• A hovercraft with a weapon^CB
  • Can drop mines^CB
• An underwater propulsion device which can shoot missiles and dash forwards³
• A submarine which shoots missiles^W
  • Can drop explosives^W

Other Equipment

• Can carry a variety of items to increase health, damage, and turn Crash invincible for a short period^CotT-DS
• Capable of throwing out TNT crates^Sky
  • These crates can contain a jetpack and rocket for Crash to fire at the ground with for a time^Sky
• Uses scuba gear³
• Wields a rocket launcher which instantly turns sheep to ashes^RR
  • Can be charged to launch two rockets at once, and can release bombs^RR
• Throws Molotov cocktails that can destroy large amounts of stone in two attacks, and quickly builds a platform after the platform that was previously there were destroyed by Spyro's Molotov cocktails^RR

Other

• His mutation enhanced his senses and stamina^Sky-A
• Can pick up a 'freejack' which allows Crash to stun any enemy with a kick^CotT
  • Knocks back large foes with this attack^CotT
• Was hit briefly by the ray that turns animals into titans, though the process didn't complete due to a dead battery. Like this Crash had enhanced strength, breaking free of metal restraints and knocking back a titan, as well as the ability to jack them without Aku-Aku, but the mutation visibly appears to be gone by the end of the short^A
• Remotely controls a helicopter to shoot down parachuting devices intent on harming him^RR
• In a Die-O-Rama, creates a fire which quickly thaws out a frozen yeti^TTR
• Walks and jumps on clouds¹
• Only likes wumpa fruit⁴
• Comes with his own theme music^Sky-A

"As for me, heh, let's just say I'm doing just fine."

Background:
The Maryland Port Authority has to constantly dredge the Baltimore Harbor, shipping terminals, and shipping channels to keep them open. Much of the dredge removed from the Baltimore harbor and Patapsco River near old industrial sites is contaminated with heavy metals, oils, and other toxic "forever" chemicals. The Maryland Port Authority (MPA) has to dry and store this dredged material in special "containment sites" because it is unsafe for human exposure. (See https://maryland-dmmp.com/). Before the 1970s, this material was often dumped back into the Chesapeake Bay. After ecological awareness arose in the 1970s and dumping was regulated, MPA was forced to create diked land-based dredge containment facilities to dry and store dredged material.
These sites, once created, are forever contaminated. MPA has done its best to create these sites where they make the least impact - often in already-contaminated abandoned industrial areas. MPA also creates conservation areas to make amends for the harm, makes clean dredge available for shoreline restorations and construction projects, makes contaminated dredge available for re-use research, and in some cases recreates islands lost to erosion (Hart-Miller Island, Poplar Island, and James and Barren Islands) using dredged material.
After significant pushback from communities near Hart-Miller Island for decades and years of litigation, MPA shut down the Hart-Miller dredge containment facility before its completion and shifted their attention to creating dredge containment sites near Baltimore in already-contaminated industrial areas next to Fort Armistead (Cox Creek DMCF) in Anne Arundel County and in Masonville next to Brooklyn. Ongoing dredging activities and plans to fill these sites to heights of 60 feet or higher with contaminated dredge and their runoff are already a significant concern for the quality of the water and the aquatic life in the Patapsco and its tidal tributaries. A potentially even greater concern is that because MPA is running out of land-based locations to contain contaminated dredge, it now plans to create Confined Aquatic Dredge (CAD) sites in the seabed of the Patapsco River to essentially bury contaminated dredge underwater in the sea floor. The first MPA full scale CAD site is planned to be built one mile off the shore of the communities of Stoney Beach and Riviera Beach near the entrance to Stoney Creek.
The planned Patapsco CAD site will be up to 220 acres in size. MPA plans to remove clean seabed material from the site for several months and make it available to construction companies and for shoreline restoration efforts and then replace it with contaminated dredge material for several more months sometime in the next year. MPA asserts that unlike historic dredge dumping, this CAD site will be "capped" and "safe". However, there will inevitably be a significant release of contaminants and turbidity into the Patapsco from this activity and permanent impact within and near the CAD site. Contaminated dredge material suspended in water can't be totally contained. Moreover, long-term ecological impacts from leaching and seabed shifting can't be predicted.
Concerns:
Northern Anne Arundel communities near the planned CAD site are very concerned about several potential issues related to its creation:

1. The noise from planned 24/7 dredging for several months at a time as well as spotlighting at night since this will be over a mile closer to Stoney Beach and Riviera Beach than the shipping channel.
   
2. The safety of residents in nearby waters to swim, fish, and engage in watersports on the Patapsco and in Stoney Creek, Cox Creek, and downstream tributaries during and after dredging from exposure to chemical and biological toxins released into the water.
   
3. The impact of such dredging on aquatic life and ecosystems including waterfowl that depend on it.
   
4. The long-term ecological impact on the CAD site, nearby shorelines, and the tidal waters around it.
   
5. The potential short and long-term geographical extent of ecological and human exposure to released toxins given unpredictable winds, currents, storms, tidal swings, and sea level rise.
   

We have questions related to these concerns and would like a greater understanding of how impacts will be measured and mitigated and what the potential risks to our communities might be - including being exposed to chemical and biological toxins. Of particular concern if this program moves forward is how will toxins be measured, where will they be measured, how will communities be notified if toxins in the water around their shoreline reaches harmful levels, and what might the long-term effects of such toxins be that might settle around our shorelines?
While we are concerned, we also appreciate that MPA is creating conservation sites such as the Swan Creek Wetlands next to the Cox Creek facility and making clean dredge material available at little or no cost to communities engaged in shoreline restoration efforts - including Stoney Beach which is planning an important natural shoreline project to protect a highly eroded natural area at our point where the Patapsco meets Stoney Creek. This greatly reduces the cost of shoreline restoration.

This is a bit of a tricky situation. I’m coming here as a last resort because it’s been months and none of my irl friends can provide me with the answer i’m looking for, so I’m hoping a fellow autistic person may understand a little better.
So I’m not in love with the person i’m dating. I love him very much, he’s my best friend, but i’m not IN love. I don’t get those feelings when I’m with him or when I think about him. In fact, I don’t really think about him unless I am reminded of his existence. I’m not aromantic, I’ve had very intense crushes in people in the past. In fact, I used to have a crush on him before we started dating, but it was never to the extent of other crushes Ive had in the past on unobtainable people. These crushes were all-consuming, like special interests. It becomes very obsessive, and although it feels amazing it’s also maddening and I feel like a stalker (lol) But it’s usually only on best friends who I know will never love me back. The fact that this man always felt obtainable and I knew he considered me “out of his league” took some of that magic away. I’m not sure if this is because of my Adhd (i have both) but it’s a recurring theme.
Anyway, I know what you’re thinking. Break up with him!!! I would. But 1. I don’t want to break his heart. 2. I don’t want to go through the pain of losing my best friend. 3. we are moving in together (with a bunch of other people) in 4 short months. Contract signed and deposit payed. A bit if a sticky one.
For nearly 5 months i’ve wrestled with the guilt of this. And I know I am wrong. But I feel trapped. I don’t find him attractive. (This might be because I am asexual though?) But i really enjoy his company, but just in the way you’d enjoy the company of a best friend. There are times where I even convince myself that I do love him only to realise that I don’t think about him much. When we go for long periods of time without seeing eachother I do really miss him but on a day to day basis i don’t find myself infatuated by him. Im indifferent.
Maybe this is just me not understanding my own feelings? I keep slipping up and acting immorally even though he doesn’t deserve it. He is a bit too obsessed with me to the point where he sulks if my attention isn’t on him at all times during a night out and he follows me around. That is annoying. But it isn’t an excuse for me to treat him badly like I have at times. I feel really shitty. I wish there was a way i could sort this out and not hurt him or myself.

This is the best tl;dr I could make, original reduced by 33%. (I'm a bot)

A humpback whale trapped in waters south of Sydney has finally been freed after a gruelling eight-hour rescue mission.
Rescue efforts began on Saturday morning after reports of a whale in distress off Five Islands near Port Kembla.
The whale, caught in a series of lines and floats, proved to be a challenge for rescuers to disentangle as weather conditions deteriorated and other whales in the area thwarted recovery attempts.
"A series of lines and floats were streaming from the whale," the Marine Rescue NSW inspector Glenn Sullivan said.
Sullivan initially said good weather conditions meant a successful rescue operation was likely.
With a southerly wind change, fading light and other whales in the area it took rescuers more than eight hours to free the mammal, which was untangled at just after 4.30pm. "The rescue crews are over the moon," Sullivan said.

Summary Source FAQ Feedback Top keywords: whale^#1 rescue^#2 Sullivan^#3 NSW^#4 crews^#5
Post found in /worldnews, /TheColorIsBlue, /UpliftingNews, /EnvironmentalNews and /GUARDIANauto.
NOTICE: This thread is for discussing the submission topic. Please do not discuss the concept of the autotldr bot here.

Yeah, so we crashed in the hills in Kamala, and I felt the stone road guard scrape against my leg and arm as we drove next to it and next thing I Remember I was on the floor. I opened my eyes as my friend is kickstarting the moped and people gather round, saying ring Ambulance. My friend said hop back on as I hoped up and got on the back bleeding out. We drove to the nearest pharmacy. They treated my wounds and wrapped me back up for 1400 baht.
My friend didn’t wanna drive anymore so even though I was injured I drove back home. After I passed out in my bed as we got back and got Rks passport and emergency cash he told us to get for him.
I woke up and looked up and everyone from the community we stayed at was at the hanging in the door looking in after hearing about my injuries. I could barely move as I took the pills the pharmacist gave me for pain and passed back out.
I woke up after something told me to get up I thought about Rk. I went on Snapchat and saw his character moving closer to the house. I called him he said the police is dropping him home to get his passport and they want to see me with my passport.
I got up immediately as I realised I gave my passport for deposit in Patong for the moped. I got changed not even considering my injuries and wrapped my leg and arm as I ran for the ped. I drove to Patong. It took me 2 hours to find the moped company. I found it eventually. I called home protested that the police have Rk and my friend from home gave the money to my sister who was gonna transfer it but was gonna have to be the next day.
I told Rk he said come they just wanna talk. I went there with my passport and they took it away and said I have to pay 100000 baht to the rental company and 40000 to the driver we crashed into. And Rk had to pay 40000 for court fees and we had 1 day to pay the 40000 to the guy we crashed into.
Rk got released and stupid us to go party with the Thai lady stacy the one we crashed with. We got fucked and went bayhill celebrating rks release. Nothing too wild. No crashes since we learned to get cabs in Thailand. ( funnily I write this from bayhill.)
We got home as reality hit us and this would be our last night out for a while. We went home ringing everyone we knew trying to get money for the company’s. We didn’t know how long this would take.
We went to the police station to pay the guy we crashed into and for anyone that don’t believe this is a true story I have evidence of everything.
I’ll fast forward time 1 week we payed off the rental company. After we was penniless we had learned our lesson the hard way and we aren’t rich we had 3k English spending me and Rk and my other friend had 1k we were far from well off.
Once we paid off the company we walked past a few times after seeing they had 2 new cars and the other one we crashed was in repair. We realised we had been fully extorted for everything we had as they smiled and waved. I had no money at all at this point and my leg was infected I was treating it day by day as I walked round with a crutch.
Now we were trying to get home but no one had enough but my other friend,(who crashed)his mum was booking him a ticket. We went to extend our visa. I didn’t have enough money so I couldn’t extend my visa, I barely paid off the company, I needed help from friends. They got there visas done and my other friend only got a 3 day extension due to being Russian. He had to leave and we wanted to give him a good send off as it set into mine and rks brain that’d we’d be stuck here.
The last day my friend was here we went partying again for the first time since the night after the crash which was about 2+ weeks ago.
(Forgot to mention Stacy snitch to police on me about the whole crash we learned in them 2 weeks and Rk had her at the house for 2 weeks near enough and she hated me and didn’t try help me even though I couldn’t walk. We came to the decision she needed to leave.)
We went out like we usually did and partied and went bayhill after I was on xannax and barely rember anything but next thing I’m in a bush and Rk and my friend were speaking to 2 girls who said come back to there hotel. They told me and bring me I went back in bayhill to get me a girl. They left me after this without telling me properly and I went back to see them gone. I had a English sim and no credit or data. I sat outside bayhill as everyone was coming out asking if my friend had been seen. A girl told me to get on the back of her ped randomly and I had no other choice lol. She took me back hers we hugged you could say lol. I woke up she took me for food and dropped me back to my friends and she demanded I gave her what she spent on me. I just was shocked thinking she done it out of good heart. I gave her 1000 baht.
I met Rk after he dropped my other friend at the airport. It set in we have to move place Tommorow and we didn’t know where we were going. We got wasted and got cab back to our place with a girl who was rks.
I woke up to the air bnb owner telling us to get out. I packed my stuff as fast as I could. We got all our stuff together and got cab to Patong. We found a small hotel off bangala road called Acca. This would be the start to our new beginnings and a downgrade you could say from our last place.
Acca was a weird hotel, my visa had run out so I had to make excuses to why I couldn’t show my passport everywhere. I forgot the first couple days at Acca but we were struggling for money bad and calling home near enough everyday. There were few days we would have enough money to enjoy ourselves. And the days we didn’t we had to tell the hotel we were waiting for money.
Acca so many memories there, we had made a few friends there so we knew most things by this point (Thais and tourists). The famous person we met the night we crashed had a YouTube channel. So people who watched his videos had seen us on there and were coming up to us asking questions. We planned on doing YouTube but nothing for us goes to plan.
I still couldn’t go out in the day because my leg couldn’t go near the sun. I was trapped inside all day and Rk would go out and meet up with the friends he met there. We got messages from friends in london I had when I was 15. They were coming to patong for a holiday and wanted to meet up.
They came and booked our hotel (different room) and we all stayed together our room slowly turned into a mess as we would get ready and go out everyday and get xannyed, drink beer and smoke weed.
We thought they were gonna be help but it made it worse they loved xannax and had money so A lot of problems would arise.
Fast forward time, Stacy was stalking Rk and I forgot to mention, Stacy was a pro Muay Thai fighter who was the champion of a popular Thai island and when she was mentioned to any local girls they would be scared knowing what she could do.

Hi, y'all!
I'm thinking about buying the Island Paradise EP, but I don't want to play in Isla Paradiso. So would I be able to enjoy most of its content if I play on another world? Can I run a resort in Sunlit Tides?

The scene faded back in to a shot of some treetops, Sammy saying "Well, even though we didn't finish, I'm glad I didn't get targeted," as the camera panned down to the Rats walking through the woods. "It was bad enough watching Leshawna and DJ go through it."
"Girl, you can't let that stuff get to you," Leshawna told her, the two girls walking at the front of their team's pack. "Sure it's humiliating, but it'll pass in time. Besides, it's not like any of us would've held your secrets against you, not when my secret was revealed."
"I hadn't thought of that," Sammy said with a contemplative look.
"We can't let our fears control us. It'll just prevent us from achieving what we want to do," Sierra told her team while focusing on her phone. She tripped on a rock and landed on her face as a result.
Confessional: Sammy
"Back home, there's this girl who's basically the princess of my school," Sammy exclaimed. "She leaks out the students' personal secrets just to get even with them or simply be mean," she gulped, "and when one of my own secrets got posted, I was teased for a week."
"Thankfully, my friends didn't bother me about it and still continued to hang out with me."
Confessional Ends
The scene cut back to the Maggots, also walking through the woods together, and focused on Anne Maria and Katie at the middle of their pack.
"This is the longest I've ever gone without using an electronic," Katie droned. "How am I gonna talk to my viewers about my day and give them advice?"
"You don't need to be on a device 24/7," Anne Maria spoke to the girl.
"Easy for you to say," Katie said snottily. "You don't have to worry about vlogs since you focus on maintaining your hair."
"Ya think that's easy?" Anne Maria retorted calmly. "I have to work overtime at a diner just to buy all the hairspray that I can afford."
Confessional: Katie
"Maybe I could've been nicer there," Katie admitted, "but my subscribers can go down if I don't upload anything."
Confessional Ends
The shot cut ahead to Scarlett and Molly, the former looking like she's been listening to the conversation behind her. "Chris has created a disadvantage for us by taking away Katie's gadget right before the game!"
"True, but Chris thankfully had the decency to end the challenge before he could reveal any more of our embarrassments," Molly said.
"The host just thrives off our pain and suffering," Scarlett summarized.
"You can say that again," Molly told her. "Sociopathy is something that could be cured, but Chris is way long gone."
\
"Welcome, players!" Chris announced over the loudspeaker again, the camera cutting down to ground level to show the Rats meeting up with the Maggots again. "Now that you're all here, it's time for part two of today's challenge," the host continued, the shot zooming out to show all thirteen campers standing in some sort of wide field of mud with a wooden ramp leading up off-camera on the right.
"The 'Mad Skills Obstacle Course'," Chris announced, the shot cutting to him standing on some patch of grass.
"The relay race begins with a mad dash from the Kick Start," the shot cut to the wooden platform at the other end of the ramp, where an absurdly large rubber root was connected by wooden shaft and gear to a pole sticking up out of the platform. "Forget coffee," the host said as the boot swung squeakily back and forth in demonstration, "if this baby doesn't get you goin', nothin' will."
"Then it's off to the race against time that is the Cannonball Run," Chris said, the camera following his motion further onward to another stretch of wooden platform. Several cannons situated below suddenly blew gaping holes in it, and the shot zoomed out to show several more cannons hooked up to a scaffold over the platform and aimed downward.
"Over to my personal fave," the shot moved to the end of the platform where a log had been set up to rotate on its side, "Wrecking Ball Alley! Hurts so good," he said as the camera panned across and the titular wrecking ball swung down over the rolling log.
"And moving on," the shot cut next to a few higher, disconnected, and generally precarious platforms, "we head to the Gang Plank, complete with rabid mutant beavers." The shot cut to the mud pit at the bottom where two giant wooly beavers with boney spikes along their back were busily chewing through the poles the gang plank platforms were on.
"Followed by," the shot cut to a close-up of a large, red, butt-shaped apparatus that was moving up and down, "the bouncy agony of Double Trouble." The shot zoomed out to show four of the butt-shaped things moving up and down between two platforms.
"And finally," Chris said, "the Grand Slam," the shot cut to several giant baseball bats sticking up out of the mud surrounding an equally giant baseball mitt, "where you'll use ropes to swing into the giant baseball mitt, while avoiding those deadly bats." The shot zoomed in on the mitt, then panned over to one of the bats as a small red bird flew head-first into it, knocking it out with a clonk. "Piece of cake," Chris said with a chuckle as the shot cut back to the staring and nervous campers.
"Oh, and as you may remember," the host added, "I said that the winning team from part one would have a distinct advantage in part two?"
"But there was no winner!" Sierra reminded the host. "You canceled the first part!"
"Yeah, don't remind me," Chris answered in annoyance. "The losing team was gonna wear snazzy specs while competing," he explained with a chipper smile, "but since we never actually finished the competition," he became annoyed again, "I've decided that everybody has to wear them!" He laughed, and the campers looked behind them to see Chef Hatchet holding a cardboard box.
Dave was the first to step forward, taking out one of the pairs of glasses – thick, ugly things that almost seemed to have a greenish tint to them – and put them on. His brow shot up immediately. "Hey, what's with the old glasses?" he asked. "We won't be able to see anything wearing these!" The perspective shifted to demonstrate what he was seeing, which was little more than an incredibly blurry shot of the forest and some unknown body of water.
"Dorktacular goggles won't make part two easy," Chris said, "or attractive," he shrugged, "but it can be done. In theory."
The campers groaned.
"Since the Maggots have one more player than the Rats," Chris added on, "one of them has to sit this one out."
"It should be Katie," Scarlett suggested to her team, "She's still suffering from her tech withdrawal."
"Fine by me," Molly boldly said. "I don't want her losing for us."
"Competitors, take your positions!" he said, and the footage flashed forward to show Anne Maria and Geoff together near the edge of the first platform, the jersey shore reject waving her hands in front of her face in order to see. "First up at the Kick Start it's Anne Maria against Geoff," the host said before the shot moved on to the next pair. "Then, it's DJ versus Sammy," the brickhouse and nervous cheerleader looked about before the shot pulled back to show the cannons, "versus the Cannonballs."
"Molly faces Scott in Wrecking Ball Alley," the indie chick and devious stared at each other, the former more competitively. "B is up against Scarlett in the Gang Plank," the camera cut to the base of the ladder then panned all the way up to it to the strong, silent genius and the quiet brainiac on top, "Dave and Leshawna will battle Double Trouble," the normal guy looked warily at the butt-shaped apparatus in front of him while the sista just cracked her knuckles, "and, Sierra will fight Trent for the Grand Slam." The obsessive uberfan nervously looked around while the cool guy tried to maintain his balance, the shot moving out to show the baseball mitt.
"First team to finish wins the whoooole shebang," Chris explained. "And, the other team loses a member tonight! Since it's a relay race," he added, "you'll need something to pass: your mascots," he said with a grin. "Oh, intern~!"
A scrawny white boy with his long black hair flipped over his eyes walked up to Geoff and Anne Maria holding a pair of pet carriers; whatever was inside was snarling angrily enough for the two competitors to exchange a wary look. "Team Rat gets a mutant rat," Chris announced as the intern thrust a large, squealing, six-legged hairless rat into Geoff's arms. "And Team Maggot gets," the host continued, "a mutant maggot," a large, slimy green maggot was thrust into Anne Maria's arms.
"Ew. It's a what?" Anne Maria said in surprise.
"Aaaand," Chris said as he prepared an airhorn, "go!"
At the sound of the horn the giant boot swung down on the two campers. With a yelp Anne Maria managed to duck out of the way, but Geoff was not so lucky and got sent flying with a scream. He landed in the mud between platforms, but kept the rat held high. It burped as Chris said "And Geoff gets the boot!"
Anne Maria hopped across the gap between platforms with the maggot in her arms.
"Anne Maria takes the early lead," Chris continued, and the jersey girl ran up to DJ.
"Here!" Anne Maria held out their mascot.
"I'll take this cute critter from here," DJ took the maggot from her, then turned and ran off down the course.
"Yeah, I got it goin' on," Anne Maria walked back the opposite way...and blindly fell into the gap between platforms, landing with a squelch of mud.
The shot cut to DJ as he ran along his part of the platform. He slammed face-first into a post, then recoiled a few steps. He vigorously shook his head and sidestepped around the post. He only got another two steps before a sudden cannon volley through the floor in front of him forced him to a stop with a yelp.
Now covered in mud, Geoff ran along the first part of the platform with his rat held out in front of him. He jumped the gap, and soon reached Sammy. "We're already far behind! Go!" the party boy held out their team's mascot.
"Got it!" Sammy said, grabbing the rat and running off.
"The Rats take the lead!" Chris called out as Sammy caught up to DJ at the start of the cannonball run. Another cannon fired towards them, forcing both to dart and duck out of the way.
"Okay," Sammy assured herself, "I just have to dodge a bunch of cannons that are impossible to see!" She charged forward, leaving DJ to chase after her.
"Time to try again," DJ added in.
The scene moved to Scott and Molly waiting at the start of the next leg. Sammy ran up and thrust the rat into Scott's arms, panting after she did so.
"Wow. We're in the lead? Great," Scott realized and started to walk slowly. "Nice and slow, all the way to last place. Right, little guy?" He told the rat while walking along the rolling log, but the rat bit him in the chin. He howled painfully and missed the wrecking ball swinging down at him. It caught him and sent him flying, all the way into B.
"Faster, DJ!" Molly yelled as DJ ran up to her and handed over their maggot.
"Good luck," DJ supported Molly as she headed for the rolling logs.
Scott was lying on the floor and petting the rat with B watching as the shot cut back to them.
"Aww, who's my good freak? Who's my good little freak?" Scott faux affectionately talked to the rat in order to slow them down as B was signaling him to pass it to him. "There, there, little guy. Uncle Scotty kept you safe and sound." He saw B waiting. "Oh, do you want this? Why didn't you say so, Beverly?"
Having enough, B took the rat before putting it in his pocket and jumped on to the first precariously isolated platform. It immediately started to wobble and sink, and B quietly cried out in alarm as the camera quick-panned to the base revealing the two mutant beavers making quick work of the pole, causing him to fall down into the mud. He recovered and saw the two ferocious-looking beavers he had landed next to.
Molly was looking up and back just in time to see the wrecking ball swinging towards her. She jumped up, safely grabbing on to the ball and allowing it to carry her forward. She jumped off at the extent of its swing, and sailed further on through the air.
The camera quick-panned over to B as he hastily sculpted a female beaver out of mud. The two beavers looked past the muddy feel and fell in love with it. As they ran over to hug it, B sneakily slipped past.
"And in a surprisingly touching move, B extends the Rats' lead," Chris announced out loud.
Scott was watching from where he landed. "Oh, come on!" he whined in disappointment.
"Go now!" Molly told Scarlett as she handed the maggot over, Scarlett immediately turning.
The beavers stopped hugging the mud sculptured beaver when the head fell off. Realizing that they were tricked, they soon turned vengeful.
Scarlett hopped to the first platform. It immediately wobbled thanks to the beavers gnawing the leg, taking Scarlett down.
"Alright, my brotha!" Leshawna cheered and took the rat from the tired B. "Let me take it from here."
Leshawna threw herself on to the first butt-shaped thing, landed, and bounced off it without a word. She continued on in this way, bouncing from one to the next until eventually she reached the end. "Sierra, take it!" she yelled to her teammate, the fangirl waiting with her back turned at the edge of the next platform.
Despite stretching her rat-holding arms out towards him as she fell, Leshawna was unable to make the pass-off in time before falling completely past her and landing in the mud. "What?" Sierra said as she finally turned around. "Aww. I missed the catch."
The shot cut to Leshawna face down in the mud. The mutant rat scampered out of her grasp. With a growl, Leshawna scrambled to her feet and chased after it screaming "Get back here!"
"Here you go," Scarlett told her teammate as the shot cut back to her holding the muddy and slimy maggot out to him.
"Got it!" Dave said as he reached out for the mutated larva.
It promptly vomited onto his face.
"IT THREW UP ON ME!!!" Dave freaked out and ran while one of the beavers grabbed Scarlett's head and dragged her down.
The perspective briefly changed to show the blurry obstacle that Dave was approaching, then changed back to his head-on close-up as he became visibly determined.
"The quicker I finish this, the quicker I can clean up!" Dave told himself just as he jumped onto the first butt-shaped object; he landed on his chest with a pained yelp and bounced off, continuing on painfully from one bouncy apparatus to the next until eventually he landed on his chest on the far platform with a slam and a groan.
"And Dave takes back the lead for the Maggots!" Chris announced, the camera cutting to him and Chef on their chairs. "He really doesn't like to get messy."
"Alright, it's my turn!" Trent declared confidently, turning proudly towards the end of the course.
"Hurry up!" Dave told him impatiently.
The camera panned back to the left, passing Dave and reaching Sierra just as Leshawna forced their team's mascot into her arms. "Here!" she commanded.
"Sorry I didn't catch it in time," Sierra apologized.
"It's like they say on Blackcomb Mountain. "Best glimpse of heaven's on the way into-" Trent said before reaching the giant mitt and saw how far it was. "Hello."
Meanwhile, Scarlett was in danger courtesy of the two beavers.
"I would ask if you detach from me now," Scarlett begged while a beaver took out a bottle of ketchup and licked their teeth. "I warned you," Scarlett growled before kicking both of their groins, making them moan. "If you had simply not taken me, then I wouldn't have had to resort to kicking you two. I show no sympathy."
Sierra had finally caught up to Trent in the Grand Slam. "This is like the electric eel part of the trust challenge from season one," Sierra talked to herself before grabbing one of the ropes that had been loosely tied there and swung off.
She passed between the baseball bats, and planted her feet on the baseball mitt. Sierra slowly lost her standing and fell into the mud. "Being splattered by mud is better than being electrocuted I guess," she laughed a bit.
Back at the edge of the platform, Trent grabbed the end of the other rope. He unleashed his own terrified cry as he swung blindly through the Grand Slam, and almost made it to the mitt – but slammed into one of the last bats with his legs spread wide. He painfully groaned as he slid down into the mud.
The footage skipped ahead to show a muddy Sierra running up for her second go, the ropes once again tied to a post on the side of the platform. "This time, I should swing higher. Then I'll be on the mitt for sure," the blogger discussed with herself.
"C'mon Sierra!" Geoff called out to her, the shot cutting to show him and the other Rats standing on a nearby platform without the glasses that had been forced on them. "Swing!"
Sierra grabbed one of the ropes again and jumped off. She stuck her legs out in front of her and passed by each bat in turn. However, her muddy hands caused her to fall from the rope just before she reached the mitt and she fell into the mud.
The Rats all groaned.
The camera panned past them and on to Trent, who had grabbed his own rope again and was sizing up his next swing. "My team needs the win," he told himself, tucking the maggot under his arm as he used his fingers to frame his target.
The music turned triumphant as he ran forward and swung off. He hit all the bats, and the peak of his swing put him just about over the mitt. It was then that he let go of the rope and fell down towards the goal, landing on his head as the maggot landed on top of him.
"The Maggots win!" Chris announced, and the maggot mascot threw up on the musician.
The Maggots cheered, having also discarded their glasses, while the five nearby members of the Toxic Rats groaned once more.
"To the Maggots, the spoils," Chris announced as Chef walked over to the winning team holding some kind of gift basket. "McLean Brand Soap, Shampoo, and Conditioner. Guaranteed to wash off the stink!" the host listed over a close-up of the gift basket, showing off its contents against a radiant yellow background.
"I'll definitely keep those in handy!" Dave said with a smile.
"Make sure not to hog all of it," Katie reminded him.
Confessional: Katie
"If my team was up for elimination, I probably would have been the one eliminated, and I wouldn't have my tablet with me. I dodged a bullet there," Katie cheered.
Confessional Ends
"Rats, see you at the elimination ceremony!' Chris added with his usual smile.
The five members of the Rats groaned for a third time. "I could've used the reward to wash off the mess," Leshawna groaned.
Sierra moaned as she got off the muddy floor, coughing up mud in the process. "Losing two times in a row? That's not gonna go well for my blog."
\
The footage flashed ahead to all of the Toxic Rats except for B and Sierra assembled at the steps leading up to their cabin. The camera focused on Scott, who was standing on the ground in front of the others. "All right, guys. Sierra's gotta go. She lost the challenge for us, and she's more focused on using her phone than competing most of the time."
"Now hang on!" Geoff replied. "So she made a mistake and slipped up. We aren't robots. I'm thinking we should give her a second chance."
"Sierra is also a big fan of the show," Sammy said. "Voting her off this early wouldn't be fair to her."
"Fair, smhair," Leshawna muttered. "If eliminating her allows us to sleep without being disturbed by her constant texting to her friends, I'm all for it."
\
The footage flashed ahead again to show the Toxic Rats at the campfire pit, Chef and Chris standing before them with their respective marshmallows.
"Ready?" Chris asked. "Everyone gets a marshmallow, even the loser!" The shot cut to a close-up of the strongbox in Chef's mitted hands. "But that's one marshmallow you do not wanna eat," Chris added as his assistant flipped the lid up and revealed the bright glowing thing inside.
"To the votes! The following people are safe," the host said, picking up the first normal marshmallow off his tray. "Geoff." The party guy caught his prize with a smile.
"Leshawna." The sista sitting next to him was next, satisfied as she caught her marshmallow.
"Scott." The devious, slumped forward, raised his free left hand and caught his prize.
"And Sammy." The nervous cheerleader allowed her marshmallow to fall into her open hands.
"Which leaves, Sierra and Bev," Chris announced, earning a nervous look from both teens.
"What?" Sierra asked in shock.
"And the Marshmallow of Loserdom goes to," Chris said, trailing off as the camera slowly zoomed in on the faces of the bottom two nervous campers.
"Sierra," the host finished.
"Me? But why?" Sierra sputtered in shock while B caught his marshmallow with his mouth.
"Don't know and don't care," Chris said. "You're out."
Sierra dodged the toxic marshmallow thrown her way. "It is what it is, but one last thing!" She whipped out her phone and snapped a photo of her and her teammates, blinding their eyesight and making them audibly yelp. "#ToxicRatsForever!" she enthusiastically claimed and ran to the Hurl of Shame.
\
The footage cut over to the Dock of Shame, the camera zoomed in on Chris and Sierra in the catapult's bucket.
"Any last words before we give you the Hurl of Shame?" Chris asked.
"Of course. Can I have a self-" Sierra said before Chris unflinchingly launched her into the air. Sierra finished with a scream as she disappeared into the night.
Chris laughed. "It was a rhetorical question. Two hurls down, twelve to go! Who will be eliminated next?" he asked the camera. "Tune in, and find out, on Total! Drama! Revenge! Of! The Island!"
(Roll the Credits)

Toxic Rats: B, Geoff, Scott, Leshawna, Sammy, Sierra
Mutant Maggots: Anne Maria, Katie, Molly, Scarlett, Dave, DJ, Trent
Episode 02: Truth or Mutant Shark
"Last time, on Total Drama Revenge of the Island!" Chris opened over a long-distance shot of Wawanakwa, the recap montage beginning soon after. "Fourteen new competitors were blown away by this year's challenges," the host said as the yacht carrying the new cast was shown, Chris maliciously pressed a button on his remote control, and the yacht blew up. "They were treated to an early-morning swim," Max was shown trying not to drown, "said hello to the island's wildlife," Dave was shown to get nearly zapped by its eye-lasers, "and did some totem-surfing," the Toxic Rats slid down the hill and into the air, falling from their totem just before it crashed into the better cabin and exploded. "Ex-plosive!"
"In the end," a few short clips of Max trying to be villainous, "Max's non-stop claims about being dangerous made him useless enough that his team sent him packing, Hurl of Shame-style." The recap footage ended with Max getting catapulted off the island.
"Who'll go home next?" Chris asked the camera from the end of the dock. "And how much pain can I put them through first? Find out right now, on Total! Drama! Revenge of the Island!"
XXXXX
The episode opened on a shot of the morning sky and a few far-away bird calls as the camera panned down to the two cabins of Camp Wawanakwa.
The shot cut inside to the girls' half of the Rats' cabins where Leshawna and Sammy were woken up to the sound of Sierra texting on her phone.
"The first day competing on Total Drama was exciting," Sierra talked to her phone. "I managed to make some friends and even though my team lost the first challenge, I'm still staying for another day!"
"Girl, who are you even talking to?" Leshawna mumbled tiredly.
"I'm giving the fans an update about my day and experience being a contestant," Sierra mentioned. "The fansite eats up this stuff."
"Are you going to carry your phone everywhere you go just to do so?" Sammy asked.
"I won't use it during the challenges, but I keep it with me at all times," Sierra said. "Without my phone, I'd probably lose my mind!"
Confessional: Sammy
"So I joined the show because my friend group suggested I do so," Sammy timidly said. "They said it's to increase my self-esteem and make me branch out more or something close to those lines."
Confessional Ends
The shot cut abruptly to a top-down view of the other half of the Rats' cabin, showing Geoff and B sleeping in their bunk beds. The sound of a door suddenly slammed open and slammed shut, waking Geoff up.
It was Scott – flat against the front door with his eyes wide, his breath heaving, and his clothes dirty. "Dude, what happened to you?" Geoff asked in concern.
Scott straightened himself out. "Oh, uh... just had an early morning make out session with one of the honeys," he explained.
Geoff got out of his bed in his pajamas and got near Scott. "Why are you so messy then?"
The footage quickly cut to a scene of Scott running in terror from a Woolly Beaver – one with several boney spikes jutting out of its back. The shot flashed back to the Rats' cabin, and Scott added "A gentleman doesn't kiss and tell."
"Wait," Geoff stepped in. "You kissed a guy?" This comment earned him an annoyed expression from Scott.
Confessional: Scott
"All right. I was out looking for that hidden immunity idol, not that they need to know," Scott opened up. "It's all part of my strategy. Let my team lose so the Maggots develop a false sense of security before I pick 'em off!"
He was interrupted by a knock on the wall. "Occupied!" he shouted until the wholly beaver from earlier barged through the wall and frightened Scott into screaming.
Confessional Ends
The camera cut back outside the cabins, zooming on on the Maggots' abode on the right then cutting inside to show Anne Maria brushing and blow drying her hair.
Scarlett walked up behind her from the left carrying a clipboard. "How were you able to sneak those cans in?" she asked.
Anne Maria placed her items inside her pouf. "Easy. I stuck it in my pouf." She noticed the clipboard. "Why are you carryin' that clipboard?"
"I've been working on sleep analysis, Anne Maria," Scarlett answered. "Your stage two sleep spindles were low frequency followed by an intense delta or slow-wave. You slept well."
Anne Maria was a little surprised to hear that. "That's nice, but don't go spyin' on me." She grabbed her hairspray from her pouf and walked away spraying her hair.
Scarlett saw that Katie was still sleeping. "Seems Katie's sleep cycle is lower than I anticipated. Had she not tried to pull an all-nighter, she'd have a higher score," Scarlett spoke to herself.
Confessional: Scarlett
"I have the need to research my teammates and know what their weaknesses and strengths are," Scarlett said. "We were able to achieve victory in the first challenge, and I want to keep it that way."
Confessional Ends
The scene flashed to the boys' side of the cabin, the camera focusing on DJ as he woke up and stretched his arms. "Morning Trent and Dave!" the brickhouse greeted his bunkmates, though Dave wasn't around at the moment. "Where'd Dave go?"
Trent, who had also woken up, shrugged. "Beats me. He probably went to the bathroom."
Confessional: Trent
"This is my first time sleeping in a cabin," Trent confessed with his guitar on his lap. "It was hard trying to fall asleep, so I played some songs that were guaranteed to make me and the guys drift off… at least that's what my friends back home say."
"Anyway, my bunk mates are pretty cool. Dave's a bit neurotic, and DJ's more soft-spoken, but once I get to know them more, I can guarantee you we'll be best buds."
Confessional Ends
The scene cut to the back of the Maggots' cabin where Molly got out of a tent that she pitched.
Confessional: Molly
"I don't like bunk beds," Molly admitted with a shrug. "They tend to break no matter how stable it is. That's why I decided to sleep outside. Besides, I wanted to have a camping experience, and sleeping in a tent is the first way to go."
Confessional Ends
The footage returned to Molly stretching her body, and a few seconds later, Dave walked up to her. "Did you sleep outside of your cabin?"
"Yep," Molly nodded.
"Do you know the negatives of doing that?" Dave crossed his arms.
"I don't think so," Molly shook her head.
"You could get bug bites or get sick," Dave explained to the indie woman.
"I already planned for that," Molly laughed. "Ever heard of bug spray and sleeping bags?"
"I know those things, but why did you sleep outside?" Dave wondered.
"One, I prefer to sleep by myself, and two, I don't like sleeping indoors," Molly gives the germaphobe answers. "I hate following the crowd."
"Okay then," Dave said. "I'm gonna use the bathroom. Are you coming?"
"I'm already prepared," Molly took out toothpaste and a toothbrush.
\
The scene cut to a seagull sleeping in a nest inside the horn of a loudspeaker. A blow horn sounded through it without warning, though, forcing the bird out into the air and revealing its snake-like features as it fell.
"Up and at 'em my little morning glories!" Chris called out, sitting on his ATV below. "It's time for today's challenge!" he announced, the camera moving behind him to show the two teams assembled in front, their respective logos appearing on the screen overhead.
"What?" Sierra asked in shock. "But we haven't even had breakfast yet!"
"Not a problem for me," Molly brushed it off and swallowed a pickle. "I packed enough pickles for me to be full."
"And we haven't had enough sleep," Katie added.
"Cognitive function is dependent on REM sleep," Scarlett acknowledged the host.
"You can catch up on your sleep after the challenge," Chris told them. "Rrright this way, to the Bay of Dismay!"
The thirteen campers groaned, except for Katie, who pulled out her tablet.
"Hey viewers! I'm gonna be at a Bay of Dismay," Katie started to film herself until Chris used a magnet to take her tablet away. "What the?"
"Contraband! Now it's mine! Confiscator's keepers! Come on! Your humiliation awaits!" Chris told a miserable Katie.
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The scene flashed ahead to the thirteen campers walking along at an even pace. "'Bay of Dismay'?" Trent told Anne Maria as they walked side-by-side. "That doesn't sound depressing at all."
"If Chris is gonna make us fight against alligators," Anne Maria said. "I'm planning on suing him after the show ends for breaking my nails."
Trent frowned, but chose to ignore it.
The camera lingered a few seconds as they walked off, long enough for DJ and Katie to enter the shot together. "So, what kinda challenge do you think Chris is gonna put us through this time?" DJ asked.
"I don't know," Katie answered without looking at him, "but I hope it's one that requires the use of a camera so I can take pictures with it, you know?"
DJ facepalmed, unseen by the influencer.
Confessional: Katie
"It's been four minutes, and I'm already missing my tablet," Katie squeaked out and huddled herself. "How will my viewers know what I'm doing right now?"
Confessional Ends
DJ decided to make Katie happy. "Maybe when the challenge is over, you could get your tablet back."
"Emphasis on maybe," Katie snarked.
"I don't know if this is going to be another physical challenge," Leshawna said to Sierra as the footage cut to the two of them walking together. "We already struggled getting that totem down last challenge."
"Chris probably has an academic challenge planned for us at the Bay of Dismay," Sierra told her as they walked forward, "and I know Chris isn't lying."
"How do you know Chris isn't frontin' us?" Leshawna asked.
"Basic knowledge," Sierra bragged. "I can tell if he's lying to us by his vocal pitch and body language."
"So you really studied the show and how it works, huh?" Leshawna followed up in surprise.
"Of course I have," Sierra said. "I've seen every episode like fifty-three times and auditioned twice before being accepted the second time."
B and Scarlett were now shown walking together. "Any idea on what we'll be facing up against?" the quiet brainiac asked the similarly intelligent boy, who didn't talk back to her. "I can see that you prefer not to vocalize your sentences like me, but you're more exaggerated."
Confessional: B
B simply shrugged in the confessional.
Confessional Ends
The static cut away to the body of water that was, presumably, the Bay of Dismay. Three structures rose out of its waters: on the left and right were two-tiered game-show-like seats that housed the Toxic Rats and Mutant Maggots respectively and bore their logos on the front; and in the middle was a single Greek pedestal upon which Chris stood in his blue tuxedo below a large video screen and electronic scoreboard.
"Welcome to the 'Getting to Know You' Trivia Game Challenge," Chris introduced. "Everyone strapped in all nice and snug?" he asked the contestants.
"Too snug," Scott answered irritably. "It's cutting into my shoulders!"
"Yeah, children's size harnesses will do that," Chris chuckled. "I'll be asking our players embarrassing personal questions," he explained, "and I mean majorly humiliating. If the player I'm talking about hits the poorly-wired buzzer and owns their humiliation before the time runs out," he continued as the shot cut back to Scott looking at the red buzzer on the counter in front of him, the camera zooming out to show Sierra on the left, Sammy on the right, and B, Leshawna, and Geoff on the back row, "their team gets a point." The camera panned across the Maggots, showing DJ, Molly, and Scarlett in the bottom row and Katie, Anne Maria, Dave, and Trent above. "First team to five wins part one, and a distinct advantage in part two."
"Buuut," Chris added as the shot cut back to him, "if no one owns up, this happens!" He took out his remote, pressed the button, and with a mechanical whir the elevated stand the Maggots were seated in suddenly dropped into the bay. The shot cut to the seven holding their breaths below the water, focusing in on DJ in particular. He looked around and screamed when he saw the large mutant shark with arms and legs looking at him hungrily, and his teammates joined in as the shark reared back to take a bite – but the stand rose back up just in time to take the teens away from danger.
The shot cut back to the surface as the Maggots re-emerged, dripping and coughing and generally frantic. "There's some kind of two-legged shark down there!" Anne Maria told the host in a panic.
"You mean Fang?" Chris asked with a broad smile and quick laugh. "Yeah, it turns out toxic waste can mess with stuff underwater too." He pointed up at the screen above him as he spoke, and the camera panned up to show a seemingly ordinary shark drinking a cup of tea on a wooden post underwater...until the screen flashed, and a picture of Fang against a simple teal background replaced the normal shark. "Who knew?"
"Better them than us," Scott said from the Rats' stand.
"Anywho," Chris continued slowly, "if a team gets dunked, their opponents can steal by guessing which dunk-ee is guilty. Guess right, and you get a point. Guess wrong, and this happens." With a sly look he pressed the button on his remote again, and this time it was the Rats who got plunged into the bay. Fang was shown tying a bib around his neck, then looking behind him just as the fresh set of teenagers came into view. He turned around and opened his mouth to bite, and with the muffled screams being heard the shot cut back to the bubbling surface. Chris pressed the button once more, and the Toxic Rats rocketed back up on their stand.
"Now that we understand the rules," Chris told them as they coughed up water, "let's start the game!" The host pulled a notecard out from behind his back. "To the Rats, now listen carefully," he began. "Who does this," he motioned upward to a picture of a question mark, "if they eat or drink any form of dairy?" the question mark farted.
All members of the Mutant Maggots began to laugh, as did the members of the Toxic Rats – all except Leshawna, who seemed to shrink in her seat as the camera zoomed in on her. "Where did you get that?" the sista asked in her embarrassment, pressing her buzzer and yelping at the shock she received.
The shot cut to the scoreboard, the Rats' half changing from 0 to 1.
The camera moved back to Chris and his card, now turned towards the Maggots. "Who sleeps with a teddy bear," he motioned upward to a picture of a brown teddy bear, "even after they turned 13?"
"Really? I thought we were more grown-up than that," Dave cringed at the fact.
Scarlett saw that DJ was feeling embarrassed. "Push the button, DJ! You're clearly harboring some guilt," Scarlett advised.
As the timer continued ticking, DJ finally shuddered, then slammed his right hand down on her buzzer. "Alright then," he declared after getting shocked, "it's me."
A bit of light laughter came from the Rats, and the scoreboard updated to show the Maggots' first point. "And it's one-all!" the host declared, earning a cheer from the Maggots.
"Aww, thanks DJ," Katie whispered to the drooping brickhouse. "I know that must've been hard, and I don't hold it against you."
"Really?" DJ regained his smile.
"I have my own collection of teddy bears in my room," Katie beamed.
Confessional: DJ
"Liking teddy bears is one thing me and Katie have in common," DJ smiled in the outhouse. "We'd have to get to know each other a bit more."
Confessional End
"Rats," Chris turned back to the other team, "whose first name is really Beverly?"
"That's not embarrassing," Trent called out defensively. "None of us will throw a fuss over a girl's name being Beverly."
Over to the Rats, Sierra was looking at a picture of Chris, Sammy was shrugging to signify it wasn't her, and Leshawna was just waiting for someone to buzz in.
B, on the other hand, looked down at his own buzzed timidly, and after some consideration, he pressed the buzzer and got shocked, raising his hand to let Chris know that he owned up to the question.
"Correct, Beverly," Chris teased the strong, silent genius. "Rats get the point, but I would've preferred a verbal response."
"But B is as quiet as a snail," Geoff piped up. "And we still got the point."
"Don't care," Chris said apathetically. "So, as a quick punishment." He smiled as he pushed the button on his remote again.
The Rats were plunged back into the water, and the camera focused on Scott as he hollered before getting chomped up by Fang, the stand rising back up as Fang struggled to close his jaws.
Scott managed to get out of Fang's mouth, shouting "No! Wait for me!" as he swam back to her seat.
Confessional: Scott
Scott winced in the confessional, pulling something white out of his butt. "What the? A shark tooth?" he asked, looking at what was obviously a shark's tooth.
Confessional: Fang
The next to use the confessional was none other than Fang, examining his mouth in a hand mirror with great concern. Upon noticing the gap in his upper row of sharp teeth, he growled angrily and snapped the mirror.
Confessionals End
Scott furiously climbed back into his seat. "Thanks for leaving me down there, team!" Scott scolded his teammates. "You can win this stupid challenge without me!"
"If he's not playing, then I'm not either," Anne Maria chimed in, the shot zooming back out as she and the other Maggots looked towards the host.
"I've already had a secret about me exposed, so I think I'll be leavin'," Leshawna declared.
"Okay, everyone just settle down," Chris told them all sternly.
"I'm with everyone else. We should stop," Molly said, standing up and trying to undo her harness. "I do not want any secrets of mine to be spilled out."
"You can do so after you've had a secret revealed," Scarlett snapped.
"Hey! Host talking here!" Chris barked. "I decide when the challenge is over."
"Whatever," Scott scoffed, having already removed his harness. "I'm out of here."
"Not until we win," Sierra held the dirt farmer back from leaving. "I am not going to have us lose."
Just then, Fang jumped out of the water and took a large bite out of the Maggots' stand, forcing them to yelp.
"Now would be a good time to leave," Sammy remarked and tried to get herself out of her straps.
The shot cut back to the Maggots as Anne Maria and Scarlett began to argue with Dave and Molly and DJ, Katie, and Trent watched the debacle going on.
Eventually, the shot cut back to Chris as he finally shouted "Alright! SHUT IT!" The off-screen arguments promptly ceased. "Thanks to that pathetic digression," he said in annoyance, glancing at his watch, "now we don't have enough time to finish this challenge! Happy?"
The Rats voiced their agreement. Likewise, all the Maggots agreed happily.
"Well you won't be happy for long," Chris told them and the camera with a smile. "Come back after the break for an all-new challenge from which there is no escape. And in the meantime," he added slyly as he took his remote back out and pushed the button, causing both teams to be dunked into the bay with a scream once more.
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(Commercial Break)
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