The poster boys of pacifist ethics are Inwards Perfection and Agrarian Idyll. That balaclava dude doesn't scream pacifism, but hear me out, the BEST civic for a Fanatic Pacifist run is Criminal Heritage.
Here are the reasons why:

Criminal Heritage interfaces poorly with Vassals:

Why do you want to have vassals in Stellaris? Because you can tax their resources and science, and use them as a road bump against other empires' agressions.
And why do you want vassals as a Megacorp? Because you don't have to have a Commercial Pact with them to set holdings there. So, just as you eat some of their pie, you also make yours and their pie larger.
Crime Syndicates don't need Commercial Pacts. They can't even form commercial pacts. You just find where the most lucrative planets are, pay the influence and energy credits and Bam! you have a Branch Office on that planet. Just keep the crime high and enjoy the benefits...
Setting a Branch Office in one of your vassals doesn't change the mechanics. He can still close your Branch Office if crime is too low, and worse, if you set a Overlord Garrison there, you will be helping them to lower the crime in the planet and thus shooting yourself in the foot.
And that isn't even the worse reason why Criminal Heritage interfaces poorly with Vassals...

Criminal Heritage effectively disable Subjugation (or any kind) of wars.

So, you are in a good economic position, and want to start your vassal swarm. Everyone is pretty much pathetic compared to you, and all you have to do is declare war and bring them into submission by force...
Except you can't. In order to declare war, first you have to close all branch offices. Those same branch offices that are offsetting your fleet cap because of their Pirate Free Havens (they produce slightly less crime than a Smuggler's Port, but those 8 points of fleet cap are yummy, specially if you are playing tall and have few systems and planets to call yours). All the influence and energy you spent on them are sunken costs now. Have fun.
But suppose you decided to bit the bullet and close your branch offices. You got in, crushed their fleets, took their planets, and they conceded defeat. Now you can just rebuild those offices and be back in business? Hell no. You have to wait until the truce ends to resume operations on those planets.
War sucks for you, even if you win. And nothing short of a total war followed by releasing the conquered systems as a vassal will help you. So, if you want to vassal swarm as a Crime Lord, become the crisis and only do Existential Expulsion wars, followed by releasing the insulated systems as Vassals and keeping "Regulated Expansion" in the contract so they will tithe you influence so you can build those branch offices (in some occasions, only to see them closed because they spammed crime reducing buildings).
Unlike the Ferengi rules says, peace is lucrative, but war isn't. You can still get vassals through defensive war, without all that hassle, if the guys where you set your Branch Offices decide to use Expropriation CB on you, or if another Megacorp decide to use Hostile Takeover on you (you get the choice to select your objective in that war, and choose subjugation). I never seen AI use either of those CBs though.

Everybody hates you:

There is more than one way to fry a fish. It may be unfeasable to win vassals by war, but you still can sweet talk them into vassalage... Except it will be MUCH harder. You gain maluses to opinion by being a Crime Syndicate, and more maluses per each branch office you have on their planets. At some point they will prefer to get devoured by the Pretoryn to be your vassal just because of that.

Crime Syndicate is the Megacorp version of Inwards Perfection

So, in a sense, Criminal Heritage is just like the Megacorp version of Inwards Perfection. Except that they don't tell you it.
You can have vassals, but if you do so, the civic becomes essentially a dead one.
You can be in a federation, but it is a pain to get there because everybody hates you.
You can do offensive warfaring, but that is incredibly costly and painful.

What kind of war benefit Crime Syndicates then?

You can benefit from going to war against Genocidal empires and Crisis empires, because you get a Total War CB, and can parcel their spaces into subservient vassals later.
You can benefit from going to war againt Gestalt Consciousnesses (Machines and Hive Minds), both to claim their space and to make them vassals (since you cannot build holdings there, no reason to not vassalize them).
You can benefit from going to war against other Megacorps, both with Hostile Takeover CB (to take all their Branch Offices) and with Impose Ideology CB (to make them cease to be a Megacorp, vacate Branch Offices for you to take later and open the possibility for you to install your own on their planets).
So, if you are having trouble with Megacorps and Gestalts, you can always drift away from (fanatic) pacifism and crush them, by subjugating the Gestalts and by changing the authority of the Megacorps. Unlike with Inwards Perfection, it will not disable the civic.
Luckly, Gestalts and Megacorps are few and far between in most runs.

What do I get for being pacifist (or fanatic pacifist) as a Crime Syndicate

For starters, the greatest complaints about pacifism are the same for Crime Syndicate. So, by being pacifist you made your peace (pun intended) with it. As we say in Brazil, what is a fart for those who already shat themselves? Since you are not going to war, why not reap the benefits of peace?
Moreover, pacifism yields +5% stability (+10% if you go hardcore on pacifism), which in turn rises the trade value of your colonies. If you are running with Megacorp, you probably will want to take Mechantile at some point and run with trade value.
You can improve it even further by taking the "Peace Festivals" edict (+10% happiness, that can translate in up to +10 stability). If you gone Fanatic Pacifist/Authoritarian, you can get up to 15 stability out of the bat with "Information Quarentine", and improve it even further with "Peace Festivals". Make your pops Charismatic and you will be looking at 90+ stability.
And if you are aiming for a Merchant Rush, take Charismatic as one of your traits. You will have a lot of merchants on all of your colonies, so if they produce extra amenities you can hit the +20% happiness and gain even more stability.

So, what Build do you suggest?

ORIGIN:

• Void Dwellers

TRAITS:

• Unadaptive
• Deviants
• Charismatic
• Incubators
• Communal

ETHICS:

• Fanatic Pacifist
• Authoritarian

AUTHORITY:

• Megacorp

CIVICS:

• Criminal Heritage
• Public Relations Specialists (to be later replaced with Corporate Hedonism)

STARTING LEADER TRAIT:

• Charismatic

​
This build expands on the ideas outlined above. You play Void Dwellers to start with 3 colonies and eventually build more. No pressing need to expand much further from your starting system. Take one sector at most and fill it with about 40 Habitats and you will be leaps and bounds ahead of anyone else.
By taking Fanatic Pacifist, you already have +10% stability in all colonies. You can improve it further by enacting both "Peace Festivals" and "Information Quarantine", and even more when you replace Public Relations Specialists with Corporate Hedonism later on.
Start by taking Merchantile Traditions, going for Commercial Enterprise before taking Adaptive Economic Policies (the basic merchant rush run), and then change the Trade Policy from Wealth Generation to Consumer Benefit and your Economic Policy to Militarized Economy.
Then take Subterfuge as your next tradition and enact "Uncovering Secrets" (thus you get 20 base intel, and get to know the capital of the empire after the first contact).
You should also take Adaptability and Prosperity (Each one grants one building slot on your habitats, and the latter one allows you to find a resource to make your habitat more useful).
Change your generator habitat into a trade habitat, build up your fleet to 20, and then build a Forge Habitat and change your Economic Policy to Militarized Economy.
Keep an AP slot to Void Borne, for as soon as you finish researching upgraded habitats (you will need it to upgrade your mining habitat), and take Master of War as your second AP.
Hire scientists to search for other empires, and as soon as you finish the first contact, set a Branch Office in their capitol. Build a merc liaison office there as soon as you set shop.
Hire an admiral that can get your fleet cap to 50 and set a Mercenary Enclave. It's easier to expand and keep a mercenary fleet early in the game.
Being dependent on mercenaries comes with it's downsizes, but the thing is that if you keep just a small fleet to patrol your systems and let the mercenaries be hired, they will be a source of revenue, to be used to upgrade the enclaves, and the other empires will believe that they can bully you (specially if they just hired the enclave's fleet), only to be proved very wrong when you pay the credits and influence to make the mercs desert their customers and come cracking down on them.
That is how you will gain a few vassals, btw.
Just keep a reserve of influence in hand for such events, and when the Khan come kicking the door, just surrender to him. No one will war on you while the khan is troubling the Galaxy, and if they do, the Khan always leave a fleet or two in your capital in follow mode with your own fleet. Just let him wreak the fool.
You will have to create a fleet to fight the endgame crisis and the war in heaven though. But if you focus on tech rushing with your considerable consumer goods income and the fact that you can build research habitats, you will be in a good place when that happens.

Hi all. Recently bought a house on a lake with lots of bass fishing. Why do I sometimes find fishing hooks or lures on my pier? Are they being thrown on the pier? It's not a big deal to me, just a mystery. I have a framed board I'm putting them on because, why not?

My dad cheated on all his wives and I am very upset about it.
TLDR: I feel immature for not being able to just forgive my dad for cheating on his wives and creating such a tough/ broken family life for me.
Details A few nights ago my mom was very drunk and started telling me all kind of things from when her and my dad were together. She told me everything from when she started dating as an adult, to when she met my father, to when they got married, to when they got divorced and all the details in between. I learned that night my dad cheated on my mom multiple time with multiple women and had no real remorse for it (he later had a second child also cheating on that wife which landed him in another divorce) growing up my mom was a very distraught woman - she drank a lot, and still does, and beat the crap out of me when she was drunk (until I was old and big enough to defend myself) I’m now totally convinced she only really heavily drank because of how bad her relationship with my dad was and she beat me because I was my dads child and I veryyy closely resembled my dad (we look veryyy similar physically) anyways I saw my dad a reasonable amount growing up, but my dad has told me (while drunk) if I was female or if I was gay/ bisexual (I have felt urges towards other males when I was on therapy for depression) he would have had and still have nothing to do with me. Growing up my dad never really physically disciplined me (I’ve always thought it was because he felt bad about my mom beating me) in early highs school I asked if I could move in with him and he told me no that he did not have the money to support me full time as at this point I would only be around every other weekend and some holidays (this was not consistent because there were times he would be on business trips or could not see me for one reason or another but would always try to make it up by getting me Ice cream or a new video game I really wanted) I knew it was just a way to make up by giving me material goods and at the time I was okay with it because I got something I really wanted that my mom would never get for me but now as an adult or early adult I feel much different about those gifts. my dad has always been somewhat of an idol in my eyes, but now (over the past 2-3 years) I’ve learned and see things that make me really dislike my dad as a person (I think in some ways he tried his best but I feel a high level of anger and not wanting to be associated with him) I am a huge pile of conflicted emotions and not really sure what to think about it all. Growing up my dad was supportive and came to different sports games sometimes but nothing else (I really enjoyed scholars bowl and won awards frequently and he always told me I and my nerd friends could celebrate alone) he was not very supportive when I left medicine to go into finance and he hasn’t been very supportive in my most recent relationship - this girl has been one of the most amazing partners I’ve ever had (he says we’re moving to fast and I am drifting from my family) I have recently felt that I really, in some ways, do not even want him present at my wedding (I would love his monetary support because it’s expensive, but after learning more about who he is I just feel he’s a selfish ahole who did not understand how to be faithful to a partner) my dad has had a tough life, things were not always easy for him he grew up in an emotionally abusive household and his dad ran around a lot on his mom. I’m trying to remember that the way he acted reflected what he knew or what he learned from his childhood based on the way his parents were and that’s how he became as an adult, in some ways he was just a product of his environment and in others he knew exactly what he was doing wrong and did not hint to prevent it he never went to couple therapy he never asked for a break ofr divorce before cheating. My dad is just not the man I thought he was an I’m very upset by it all. His wives have always been slightly disrespectful to me (telling me things like I don’t behave or I’m a baby for crying or I’m a wimp for not standing up for myself or I’m a loser for dropping out of med school) I realize he has his own problems and it took time for him to admit those issues and try to work through those problems, but I can’t help but thinking my dad is a POS and I feel like I’m not being very understanding and being very judgmental - this is not all about me but I’m so upset he lied about everything that happened and just continued his way of life..

Fellow aphants, I recently took cannabis and saw color images. It lasted less than 5 minutes, after which it faded to the same dark dead black everything always is for me. I couldn’t get it back hard as I tried except I didn’t even know how to try. This was my first cannabis in years and even if I’d had images before it would have been inconsequential because I would have figured everyone else who saw them with drugs, didn’t without drugs. This is what motivates this post.
Hallucinogens are called that because they produce hallucinations. Technically a hallucination is something you “really” see (like a dream where you ”really” believe you’re in it), but in the context of aphantasia, what does really seeing mean? I’ve come to realize most people can visualize images mentally. This seems a lot like they’re hallucinating, but without the accompanying belief that what they see is real. This seems like an opportunity for big pharma to make a pile of money, with a pill that allows us to produce our own “hallucinations” while not believing they’re the real world, and (hopefully) including our retaining the power to direct the images rather than their appearing on their own as in most dreams.
In my little cannabis sequence I could sort of aim the scene though I didn’t just create it. I didn’t just conjure up a dozen little sort of lego people waking along together. They just appeared, but then I caused them to walk this way then that way. Yeah it was weird as well as wonderful.
Hallucinogens without the unwanted parts of hallucinations. Could that be possible? I’d take that pill. How about you, dear redditors? I’m not even sure whether it’s the red pill or the blue pill, but I’d take it!

Hi, I have the Big Bads, 6000 Tokens and am deciding to buy Iron Lad or Jeff? What card do you think has more "staying power" the next month? I tend slightly towards Jeff, but heard a lot of positiv things about Iron Lad...

After a successful UB tek grow, I’ve decided to go all in. Here’s my current plan and supplies-
Supplies-
8 spore syringes, 2 of 4 different strains (been sitting in my fridge for about a month, how long can I store them this way?)
8 grow bags .2 micron for inoculation
8 grow bags .5 micron for s2b
Lots of coco coir, verm, gypsum for s2b
23qt pressure canner
40 lbs of dry brown rice courtesy of costco
Plan-
Cook the rice (how long? Do I boil or simmer?)
Put in .2 micron bags (how much per bag?)
Pressure cook bags (how long, what temp, general tips please!)
Squirt in the shroom juice, cover hole with paper tape (how many CCs per bag? Do I do a full syringe per bag or just .5 cc like UB tek or somewhere in the middle?)
Wait
Wait
Break and shake (should I even do this? Seen mixed opinions in shroom communities, some people have tested it and seen minimal to no benefit)
Wait
Wait
Put coir in 5 gal bucket, pour a pot of boiling water on it. Stir with knife, cover and let sit overnight (my last grow got contam after the first flush, so I think I may have messed up this step. Should I do it differently? Any advice?)
Put fully colonized rice in .5 micron bags for s2b with coco coir, verm, gypsum (how much of each ingredient? Do I use all the colonized rice from a .2 bag in a .5 s2b bag?)
Harvest as veils begin breaking
Rehydrate bag after flush (any advice on how to go about this?)
Repeat previous 2 steps until the bag is done
(Should I even s2b inside a bag? Should I buy a bunch more big monotubs and s2b there?)
Sorry for the long post, thanks for reading! If there’s any posts or other resources you’d recommend I check out before I go for it, please link them in the comments!

Full text of tweet thread:
I’ll give you my Fight Forever impressions:
Pros: it plays like a new No Mercy in the best way. The things they added feel natural, moves look good, game plays fast but not out of control. Lots of rewards for mixing up moves. Lots of opportunities for counters. The arenas are awesome. It truly feels like No Mercy 2023 and anyone can pick up and play and not feel undermatched. Wrestlers who don’t play games were still getting offense in against pro gamers.
Cons: was not a fan of the menus (which is not a big deal but is the first thing you see). The mini games are like this dope bonus…except some are kinda just…not it. Only 2/6 have replay value imo. Shida home run derby being the by far standout.
Overall the game is gonna make wrestling fans stupid happy.

Hello (or Bon soir if you're reading this from France),
This will be my first time visiting France, and I'm getting more and more excited with the prospect of seeing famous landmarks like the Eiffel Tower, and being by the Mediterranean Sea. I also cannot forget that I will have the pleasure of trying French food, and I am looking forward to eating a streakfrite.
As the title suggests, I am Canadian (but I don't live up to any of the stereotypes). I like to travel, and this will be my first time visiting continental Europe, as I've only been to the British Isles before. Apart from the UK and Ireland, I have travelled within Canada and to New York City. I would like to see more of the US, especially California, but that will have to be for another time.
I'm looking to connect with someone from France, especially if they drive trains for the SNCF. Maybe you can tell me the best stations in Paris to see the old TGV Atlantique and Réseau sets. If that is not your interest, pas de problème. History is another big interest of mine, and I'm certain there's a lot of history in France.
However, if you are not from France, that's also no problem. I wouldn't mind making a friend from elsewhere, especially if they're here in Canada.
One last thing, if you're a photographer then I hope you can show me how to get the most out of my now problematic Nikon DSLR.
Cheers.

Next week i'm gonna play the Top 8 of my lgs's league. Since the prize for the first place is quite big (700 euros) i'm seeking some advice on what to play since what i usually play is pretty bad against what i'm gonna face.
I usually play Glimpse or Asmo reanimator but my first opponent only plays merfolk with 4 [[Mistcaller]] maindeck (there's a lot of creativity and LE), so the match up is really bad. If i win this i'm probably against a creativity deck (hello spell pierces and t3feris in the main) which sucks again.
I was thinking of playing something like amulet (either Titan or timeless), goblin, enchantress or tameshi: what do you suggest guys? Even other decks i didn't mention are fine to suggest.

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Dragon’s Heart Tower, Level 23, Residence 30. Thacea and Emma’s Bedroom. The Tent. Local Time: 0500 Hours.
Emma Booker
I fucked up.
Big time.
And I had no one else but myself to blame.
You know that feeling when you dive head-first into a project that you had zero doubts would somehow work itself out in the end?
The sudden surge of confidence that comes when you let the indomitable human spirit take the wheel?
Well that was me at 0300 hours when my eyes landed upon the hygiene module, and pictured the inevitable outcome of a steaming hot shower after an entire day of nonstop grinding.
I couldn’t help myself but to fall into the same trap as every other would-be DIY-er. I couldn’t stop the excitement, the sudden surge of energy, and the absolute hyperfixation that came with completing a project that promised nothing but endless positives, at the expense of some time and effort that would prove minimal in the grand scheme of things.
And just like every would-be DIY-er, I was this close to completing the task at hand, before finally reaching a roadblock that inevitably brought everything to a screeching halt.
FINAL STEP: REFER TO [UNDESIGNATED WATER SOURCE] FOR ATTACHMENT OF INTAKE PIPE [EIP23] TO EXTERNAL PUMPING MODULE [EPM-1].
That one, final instruction, decimated me.
Especially as I got to that final step at just shy of 0500 hours, when I finally had the entire damn module set up, only to realize that I had missed out on a vital pre-procedure checklist that I’d purposefully skipped because I’d assumed it would be a non-issue.
ENVIRONMENTAL PREREQUISITE: LOCATE, EVALUATE, AND SECURE A RELIABLE WATER SOURCE.
And that’s why I only had myself to blame for this fiasco.
Because I’d assumed that the availability of a water-source in the dorms would’ve been an open and shut case. It only made sense for me to make that assumption though, as I saw that Thacea had clearly used the dorm’s en-suite to shower just the night before.
It was because of this that I didn’t even bother checking the bathroom to begin with. I thought that whatever was in there could’ve easily fit the hyper-modular fittings of the source-intake pipe.
Things couldn’t have been further from the truth however, as what I saw within that bathroom made me question the very fabric of my own reality.
As within those four marble walls, was nothing.
Nothing, but a series of dull flat marble surfaces, and some strange wall-fittings that looked like something out of a 21st century ‘modern’ art exhibit.
There was nothing here that resembled a tap, or even hinted at the fact that there were even any pipes carrying running water behind those four bare walls.
The only other thing of note here was an unseen light source keeping the bathroom lit.
Aside from that, there was literally nothing else here.
This meant I had only one option available to me.
The most logical and straightforward option, of simply nudging the avinor princess awake just so I could ask where I could find a fucking tap.
Whilst it was the most straightforward thing to do, I just couldn’t get myself to do it.
I’d thought about going up those stairs to nudge the avian awake, to then apologize profusely for disturbing her sleep… but given everything Thacea had done for me thus far, and considering the fact that I was responsible for almost all of the headaches we were currently experiencing, it just felt wrong for me to disturb here at that hour.
So I was left with the inconvenient truth of my circumstances, and decided to just embrace the suck, toughing out the folly of my hubris…
At least, until morning came around.
At that point, I could rest easy in actually asking the princess for pointers on the enigmatic machinations of the bathroom.
Until then, I would sleep.
And hopefully, my shortsighted adventure would bear some fruit when morning rears its ugly head around.

Dragon’s Heart Tower, Level 23, Residence 30. Thacea and Emma’s Bedroom. Local Time: 1000 Hours.
Emma Booker
Good news: Half of my hard work actually paid off.
Bad news: Only half of my hard work actually paid off.
Upon waking up three hours later, forcing my carcass up and back into the suit, I’d managed to flag down Thacea just as she was getting out of bed.
The princess’ reactions to my questions were nothing short of the politeness I’d expected from her.
Which managed to put me at ease as I was getting worried I was starting to get on her nerves with my constant flurry of questions.
The bathroom turned out to be yet another demonstration of the Nexus’ completely unhinged philosophies. As it relied entirely on a mana user’s manipulation of the room to operate. Apparently, whoever designed this place took the whole concept of a modular, personalized room, and just ran with it. Making it so that every aspect of the room relied solely on the mana user to work, as they had to shape, form, and structure the otherwise blank slate before use. This was supposedly done so that the room could be made to fit the precise criterion of a person’s liking. To me however, it just felt like another bizarre concept pulled straight out of the Nexus’ seemingly endless idea-pool of zany, overkill, and mana-addled solutions to problems that sort of existed.
Thankfully, the bathroom didn’t require constant intervention from a mana-user to operate, as certain elements could be permanently turned on.
This included the water mains, which I immediately hooked up the pipes to, as the mana-contaminated water was quickly siphoned into a series of filtration units, all with the express purpose of extracting and removing every ounce of mana present within the water.
This process took about two hours to do.
But by the end of it, I was rewarded for all my troubles by one of the best showers I’ve ever had.
All of the stress, even the constant ticking of the bomb which constantly gnawed at the back of my mind, seemed to fade away for a few short minutes as the warm water washed everything away.
But that about wrapped up the good news.
The bad news however, came in the form of the little MREDD experiment from the previous night.
As I opened the triple-airlocked compartment on my side of the tent, I was met with what could only be described as ‘food’ in name and aesthetics alone.
The soft, white, fluffy loaf of bread had literally become a baton. Whilst the pancakes were now more reminiscent of a mini-frisbee that cracked and crumbled the moment I laid my fingers on them.
My immeasurable disappointment grew the longer I stood there next to the MREDD, and the longer I stared at the small stack of dust that was once a perfectly cooked stack of pancakes.
Beyond this however, I could feel a bit of anxiety seeping in, as the results of the experiment did make me a bit anxious as to the long-term food security of this mission.
Then again, I should’ve expected this result.
It was the first calibration test after all.
“I should’ve expected this, shouldn’t I?” I spoke to no one in particular, but quickly garnered the attention of the EVI who remained within the power armor that currently stood imposingly just a few feet away from me.
“That is correct, Cadet Booker. As you are already aware, the MREDD is designed with multiple calibration protocols in-effect, each which correspond to the type and densities of the foodstuffs to be desaturated. In addition to this, the systems are designed to test the maximal extraction threshold against the subjective palatability gradient with the food safety variable as an integral aspect of these tests. Thus, the first-round extraction procedures dictate that the MREDD will attempt maximal extraction settings, in order to both stress-test the components and systems, as well as to garner data on the mana-extraction process at the maximal setting.”
I blinked rapidly upon hearing the EVI’s explanation being blasted from my suit’s speakers. It felt somewhat jarring turning around to face my armor talking to me. But then again, I should’ve expected it, as I’d yet to set up any other speaker systems within the tent for it to speak through.
“I know, EVI. They already ran everything by me during the briefings. Though I would be lying if I didn’t say I sort of hoped that putting the food under full blast for 7 hours would’ve somehow miraculously resulted in something edible.” I managed out with a sigh.
“Cadet Booker, it is logical to assume that since the extraction of mana from both food and water is indeed viable, that the only point of contention is now the palatability of the foodstuffs rendered through the MREDD.”
“Yeah, well…” I trailed off as I began tapping on the loaf of bread that sounded like styrofoam when I hit it against the armor. “I think you and I have different definitions of palatable.”
“I am confident that the mana-extraction process can be optimized, Cadet Booker. It is at this point that I must ask that you assess the palatability of the designated foodstuff marked CONSUMABLE GROUP A, ITEM 1, for the purposes of data-gathering and analysis.” The AI spoke in a no-nonsense fashion, as I turned around, giving it a look of utter incredulity.
“You want me to try to eat this?” I shot back, tapping on the styrofoam bread for added effect.
“I require data on the palatability of foodstuff A-1 [BREAD] as it is a subjective dataset relying entirely on the input of the human subject.” The AI continued.
I couldn’t help but to shudder at that last line, especially with how it was delivered.
Popular media back home was currently going through another AI-apocalypse phase, with a lot of movies, both immersive and traditional, diving deep into the uncomfortable topics of human-AI relations post AI-takeover.
Being stuck in a bare, white tent, with a monotone, somewhat disgruntled-sounding VI talking to me through a suit of armor several heads taller than me all the while suddenly referring to me as subject really wasn’t doing my movie-binging gremlin brain any favors.
I hesitated for a few seconds, tentatively staring at the bread, then the armor, then back to the bread again, before finally just going for it...
CRUNCH
It did not end well.
“Cadet Booker, I did not require that you actively consume a foodstuff you consider inedible or are uncomfortable eating. I merely needed a dataset for the purposes of this experiment, even if that data-set is a refusal to consume the foodstuff in question.”
I stared back at the VI with unamused eyes and a mouthful of hard-tack currently turning my mouth into the Greater Sahara.
“Damnghit Aeevi.” I managed out with a mouth full of bland, stale bread, before reaching for the water dispenser which thankfully still had some mana-free water inside of it.
“Shall I log A-1 down as unpalatable then, Cadet?” The AI spoke with a hint of disappointment in its voice.
Though I was probably just imagining the actual tone of its voice.
Projection was a heck of a thing after all.
“Yes. And make sure you clarify your intent next time.” I snapped back, as I finished up what limited bits of housekeeping I needed to for now. Which included punting the balled-up undersuit into the washer, getting the wash and dry cycle started, before grabbing a fresh undersuit from the cargo airlock and quickly putting it on.
“I guess the next test with the MREDD includes extracting mana at a slow, sustained rate?” I spoke as I began recalibrating the different electronic components within the undersuit.
“Correct, Cadet Booker. Provided of course, that the foodstuffs are of a similar type, and contain similar properties to GROUP A.”
“Acknowledged.” I responded promptly, shuddering a bit as the haptic feedback finished its calibration cycles. “Alright then, we got a lot of work ahead of us, so let’s get going. System status, SRR?” I asked as per protocol, steadying my hand on the suit’s ‘backpack’.
“Diagnostics running… pending… All systems nominal, Cadet Booker. Status: Ready for standard operations.”
“Operator acknowledges system status after pre-mission diagnostics.” I replied dryly, and with a few final breaths I pulled myself back into the armor. “Current objectives? Preferably the ones I listed before dozing off last night?” I continued, as my eyes quickly readjusted to the constant assault on the senses that was the HUD.
“Priority Objective: Locate and Secure Container 10. Current time remaining until activation of the Denial of Sensitive Assets to Unauthorized Parties Protocols… 36 hours, 34 minutes, and 47 seconds.”
“Alright then, let’s pay a visit to our dear old friend… hopefully she’s alive and lucid enough to get us to the bottom of this little predicament.”

Dragon’s Heart Tower, Level 23, Residence 30. Thacea and Emma’s Bedroom. Local Time: 1020 Hours.
Emma Booker
Transitioning from the tent to the marble and cobblestone world of the Academy was always jarring. Opening those external protective flaps to reveal something that wasn’t more bare white paneling and drab gray composalite would probably be something I’d need to get used to.
I got into the swing of things quick enough, as I was met with the likes of Thacea who was busy reading on one of the many ornate seats that formed the mini-living room within our loft.
“Was the water to your liking, Emma?” Thacea asked with a clack of her beak.
“I managed to squeeze in a couple minutes worth of a shower, so that’s a win in my book!” I beamed out. “But with a constant stream of filtered water filling up my reservoirs now, I should be able to get something more substantial later tonight.”
The princess nodded slowly at that. “The lengths to which you need to go, just to attain what we take for granted on a daily basis, is quite remarkable Emma.”
“It is what it is, Thacea.” I shrugged in response. “The very air I breathe needs to be filtered. This whole world, or heck, even your worlds are actively hostile to human life. These measures are something that are cumbersome, and seriously draining to deal with, but it’s necessary. Besides, it’s not as if these measures are something new where I come from. My people have had a history of intrepid explorers, brave pioneers, and foolish thrillseekers who all surge forward into inhospitable domains just so they can crest the next wave, or see what’s over the next hill.” I paused for a moment, as I was tempted to strike a pose, but quickly decided against it. “I’m just furthering a legacy that’s already been established. Or at least, I hope I’m doing that. Heck if I know if I’m actually doing things right. Nine times out of ten, I feel like I’m just making the best of my situation.”
“I can’t say I can understand the appeal of this legacy of actively seeking hostile-domains.” Thacea responded with an equal mix of curiosity and genuine concern. “And I do not know what manner of civilization would result from such a culture, though I do harbor a morbid curiosity to inquire further… However, I can most certainly resonate with your latter statements, Emma. Half of the court politics I contend with simply amounts to making do with the hand you’ve been dealt, of making best of one’s situation, and doing whatever it is in your limited scope and power to maintain life, security, and perhaps some waning semblance of your own personal liberty. It’s a great game, where doubt comes naturally as a result of being a player and not the host.”
There was a small pause that followed Thacea’s response as one point in particular caught my attention more than any other.
It was unfortunate that it was so topical as well, given how if things had turned out any differently, this conversation would’ve moved right on into an hours-long exchange of life and culture.
Thacea mentioning the concept of a great game, immediately brought me back to the conversation with Ilunor the previous night.
“Thacea… would you mind if I consulted you on something?” I began, as the gears in my head began turning now at the first major issue of the day.
The princess seemed to catch on as she leaned forward in her seat intently, and nodded. “By all means.”
“Something happened last night at the workshop, and it wasn’t anything to do with the armorer… though, we can talk about that later.” I took a deep breath as I shelved that topic for another time. “Did you happen to pay any attention to Ilunor’s whereabouts after I left for the workshop?”
“Not particularly, no. Lord Rul-, erm, Ilunor had seemingly remained in his room until Thalmin and I retired to our respective rooms. After that, I simply have no recollection of anything beyond my own domicile.”
“Well, Ilunor followed me to the workshop.” I stated plainly, pausing for a moment to gauge Thacea’s reaction. Of which there really was none as she managed to keep that signature poker-face that was probably second nature to her by now.
“And I’m assuming since you managed to uncover this, that his meddling had failed in some way shape or form?” Thacea shot back coolly.
“Correct. However, here’s where things get complicated. I’ll save the bulk of the events for later, but long story short, that discount kobold decided to use some sort of a projection spell to spook me just as I was in the middle of the weapons inspection with the armorer, and the projection used wasn’t just something a random monster or anything… he purposefully chose to bring out a carbon-copy version of the null.”
Thacea’s face shifted at this, which given how difficult it was to phase her, probably meant her mind was going through the full implications of this revelation.
I pressed on as Thacea urged me to continue with a single nod. “Well, I shot it. And, no, nobody was hurt. Fast forward a chase sequence later, and the armorer eventually managed to corner and capture Ilunor. However, when we pressed him for answers about why he was there to begin with? Well… I think it’ll be better for you to see for yourself.”
It was with this that I brought out my data-pad, and began replaying the relevant scenes for Thacea to see.
Starting from the brief spats between Ilunor and the armorer, all the way to my confrontation with the diminutive lizard, Thacea’s gaze remained completely transfixed. She did flinch a bit when the footage finally went over my dealings with the lizard, and Ilunor’s sudden shift in persona as I pulled out the library card and began talking his language.
Yet despite being inundated with this sudden flood of information, with a completely unexpected tangent, she soon responded cooly and without much in the way of a delay. “This complicates matters.” She began slowly. “This entire situation calls for a complete reevaluation of the dynamics of this peer group, and how we need to approach Lord Rul-, Ilunor.” Thacea promptly corrected herself before continuing. “There’s a great number of layers to this unexpected development, each of which hints at a greater game being played here, and points at the fact that there are a great number of interested parties beyond just Ilunor.” The princess took a moment to let out an exasperated coo, her eyes finally moving away from the tablet and back to me. “You must understand as well as I, that Ilunor’s actions do not constitute a scheme of his own making, correct?”
“That I do.” I nodded simply. “The fact that he’s even bothering to do this in the first place is outside of his whole I’m above you persona. I’m not sure if the same rings true here, but where I come from, becoming a spook is not something that most people in high and mighty positions would ever stoop down to. Besides, I think we have a lead. I don’t think a student would actively defer a bit of punishment from a lower level administrator, in order to fast-track it to the highest authorities if they weren’t in cahoots with them.”
“This coincides with my observations of these developments as well, Emma.” Thacea responded with a resonant chirp. “To add to this, his knowledge of the null is most certainly not circumstantial, and considering he was absent from our adventures the previous day, his knowledge of this creature would hint to either the feeding of information via a higher benefactor, or a direct observation of our activities from afar. Either way, this does not bode well.”
“This leads me to what I wanted to consult you on, Thacea. If Ilunor’s out there waiting for us right now, would it be best if we confronted him outright in front of Thalmin or-”
“No.” Thacea interjected sharply, and with a certainty that was almost uncharacteristic of her. “Confronting Ilunor out in the open, in front of others not privy to you and the Vunerian’s current game, would be outright suicide to the dialogue you’ve managed to broker with him the previous night. You’ve managed to prove yourself as not just another pawn, but a player in the game, at least in Ilunor’s eyes. It would be wise to maintain that momentum, Emma. By continuing this line of dialogue with him in private, there is a higher likelihood the Vunerian will divulge more information as he speaks to you frankly, beyond what his current facade will allow. This is now a matter between you and the Vunerian, as Thalmin and I are not privy to these political transactions.”
I couldn’t help but to mimic the princess by gripping my forehead as well, letting out a sigh as the dread of complex court politics had begun seeping in faster than I expected. “That shouldn’t be too hard to do. I’ll just let that situation slide for now, making sure not to mention my dealings with Ilunor when he’s around, and focus instead on our other problems. It’s not like we have a shortage of other things to worry about after all.” I sighed sharply.
“That is an acceptable plan. ” Thacea responded promptly as she stood up and began straightening out her uniform. “Right then, shall we proceed?”

Dragon’s Heart Tower, Level 23, Residence 30. Living Room. Local Time: 1025 Hours.
Emma Booker
As we exited the bedroom, we were once more met with a similar sight reminiscent of the previous day’s. As there, on the couch, were the bickering pair that had seemed to have carried over their arguments from the previous night.
Except this time, the context seemed to have thankfully shifted to something new.
“Every minute I waste in this room for the sake of that Earthrealmer is another minute that I grow increasingly more famished. It is unbecoming of a noble to sit in waiting for a commoner. In fact, it should be the other way around. Or perhaps this is yet another one of your Havenbrockian reforms that test the Nexus’ patience, Prince Thalmin?” I could hear Ilunor snapping at Thalmin just as we made our way into the living room proper.
Thalmin, amazingly, resisted responding in kind as he got up as soon as we made our way towards the pair.
“We were waiting for the both of you, but it should be fine. Should we miss the breakfast, there is always an a la carte menu we can-”
“I have met the criterion for your unlawful detainment, mercenary. Thus, I shall take my leave.” Ilunor promptly jumped off from the couch and began trotting his way over to the door, his little legs were clearly attempting to generate some sort of a forceful series of thumps as he did so, but only resulted in a light series of taps given his diminutive size.
“Hold on a minute there! That wasn’t our agreement! You agreed to-”
“I agreed to wait for the Earthrealmer and the tainted one. I have no other reason to be here. Now, I must resume my extracurriculars. You lot can do whatever it is you get up to. I will be having none of it.” Ilunor turned to face the Lupinor one final time, before slamming the front door shut, and skittering off.
This made things so much simpler as it meant we were in the clear for now.
“I’m sorry princess.” Thalmin turned to face Thacea. “I thought we might be able to squeeze something out of him yet, but the Vunerian continues to be as squirmy as a prairie rodent.”
“It’s quite alright, Thalmin.” Thacea began, as she turned towards me as if to confirm whether or not I wanted her to proceed on my behalf. To which I did. “There are a few matters we must address regarding Ilunor, which I suggest we do over a short breakfast, as we have even more pressing matters following this.”
After a reluctant pause, the lupinor prince nodded in agreement, leading to both of us sitting down-
ALERT: LOCALIZED SURGE OF MANA-RADIATION DETECTED, 275% ABOVE BACKGROUND RADIATION LEVELS
-and a privacy screen being brought down soon after.
“So, shall we talk about this over a brunch platter?”

The Transgracian Academy for the Magical Arts, En Route to the Healing Wing. Local Time: 1050 Hours.
Thalmin’s reactions were nothing short of what I’d expected.
There was absolute outrage, followed by an unrepentant series of growls, capped off with barks of seething anger at the same clips I’d played for Thacea earlier.
The mercenary prince was perhaps even more uncomfortable than I was at my entry into this game, as it was clear Thalmin despite his noble heritage, wasn’t really one to dabble in it at all.
“I’m telling you Emma, this is a dangerous path forward. Are you certain you are making the wisest choice?” He spoke once again, continuing the conversation from earlier, underneath yet another privacy screen Thacea was maintaining as we approached the medical wing.
“I don’t like it either, Thalmin. There’s nothing more I hate than playing politics, but it’s unfortunately a pill I have to swallow if we’re going to get to the bottom of the issues surrounding Ilunor. I mean, I overheard you guys arguing late into the night. I really don’t think confronting him normally is going to get us anywhere.”
The lupinor let out a sigh of defeat at that, as he lowered his head in my general direction. “I can’t fault that logic, Emma. Perhaps… speaking his language, as you put it, would bring us some resolution to this frankly irritating problem. However…” The Lupinor’s voice lowered, just as we were about to reach the doors to the healing wing proper. “I know how these games work, Emma. It’s dangerous, so make sure you tread lightly, and just know that I, as part of your peer group, am here to support you should the need arise.” The prince reassured me with a smirk, as we pushed past the double doors and into the medical wing proper.
Or at least, that’s what I thought, as we entered what looked to be a massive circular room with multiple branching hallways connected to it like spokes on a wheel. In typical Academy-fashion however, the room really wasn’t at all modest with its size. As it went up a solid twenty or so stories, with high pillars piercing straight up into a marble-lined rotunda with moving murals painted on it like some grand cathedral. Between these pillars were little outcroppings where several gargoyles were perched.
Gargoyles which I could swear were looking straight at us.
ALERT: LOCALIZED SURGE OF MANA-RADIATION DETECTED, 425% ABOVE BACKGROUND RADIATION LEVELS
My gut was proven right again, as it only took a few seconds after our entry for these stony beasts to come to life, with multiple bursts of mana-radiation accompanying what could only be described as the sounds of cracking concrete.
Soon enough, several large gargoyles made harsh, heavy landings right in front of us. The two closest to us held out their arms, before zapping two stony spears into existence, crossing them in a clear display to stop us from going any further.
“Halt!” A voice commanded from above, as a shadowy figure landed right in front of the two gargoyles blocking our path. The figure’s face was hidden underneath an unnatural shadow casted by his hood, revealing just two trapezoidal lights where his eyes should be. “The healing wing is currently off-limits to visitors. So state your ailment, or leave where you came from.” The voice boomed, echoing throughout the large open space, as all eyes within the room now landed squarely on us.
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(Author’s Note: Hey guys! We see more glimpses of Emma's quality of life getting set up here, and we're now making our way over to the apprentice! I hope you guys enjoy! :D The next Chapter is already up on Patreon if you guys are interested in getting early access to future chapters!)
[If you guys want to help support me and these stories, here's my ko-fi ! And my Patreon for early chapter releases (Chapter 33 of this story is already out on there!)]

Fair warning : this is a rant about all the back and forth in my mind around top surgery while being a non-binary fairy who plays between masc and femme gender expression regularly.
I am tiny humxn with a small chest and most days I wear sports bras. The first time I put on a binder I never wanted to take it off. I LOVE the flat feeling when running my hands over my chest. Unfortunately, I can't bind that often for medical reasons, so most days I wear tight sports bras. I love trans tape but the adhesive is really tough on my sensitive skin and makes me break out every fucking time... so back to the sports bras.
I don't hate my chest. I'm really glad I have small boobs because tbh the idea of having a large chest is extremely dysphoric/terrifying to me. It took a long time for me to accept that my chest is beautiful and my naturally large nipples are gorgeous. Yet... they still feel like these little sacks just hanging off my body, getting in the way most days and things I spend more energy trying to bind rather than show off. I also never want to have biological children or breast feed. But tbh my whole life I have never understood the point of breasts. Like why are we one of the few mammals that has breasts even when we aren't breast feeding? So weird. Anyways, I've never loved having tits, I just learned to accept them as part of my body and my body is innately beautiful.
My biggest hesitation with a top chop is losing nipple sensation. I gain pleasure from them being touched and I'd be sad to lose that. Also, I like that my chest gets tender before menstruation. (I actually like my monthly bleed because I had a lot of medical issues in the past that kept me from menstruating, so the bleed reminds me that I am healthy and the breast tenderness is a form of communication from my body, one I deeply respect... yet I know there are other ways my body will continue to communicate with me outside of my chest if I do get the surgery. * I also currently have no desire to go on T*)
All that to say, when I see other tiny enby folx with their top chops, playing with the spectrum of gender expression, I makes me tear up. I want that. I imagine myself continuing to play with the femme and masc expressions but without titties and it feels right.. without limitations, and a sense of relief. I imagine getting out of the shower and no breasts being there and how freeing that would feel. To be shirtless cutting the grass or playing at the beach. To wear a low cut button up shirt and not worry about binding... dreams.
I hope I am not romanticizing or glamorizing this big procedure. I expect and understand that there may be a deep sense of grief that comes from removing this part of my body but I really hope the euphoria and liberation makes it all worth it,,, like I'll finally be free in my body.
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As you can see, I am a bit all over the place but the deeper I dive the more right a top chop feels for me. I am curious if there are other genderfluid folx out there who also don't hate their chest but got surgery because it felt right. Curious to hear your thoughts and stories.. thanks for reading all thisss <3

I have a 9 month old (guessing because I got him from a pet store) male ball python. 3 months into having him had him, I made the choice to begin feeding him live mice and now on rats.
I know there is a lot of controversy about feeding live and some of you might disagree with this method of feeding. However, I promise you this choice of food/feeding method was not made lightly.
Since I have been feeding him live, he has never had a problem, and this is the first time he didn't eat his meal within a day.
I removed the rat and put it in a different enclosure with water, food and shelter. I have also checked him over for bits and scratches and he is in perfect condition.
I watched him when I first put the rat in his enclosure and he seemed very interested and even attempted to strike at it several times. However, after a couple of hours, he lost all interest and seemed exhausted and retreated back to his hide.
I have a few suspicions about why he might not have eaten his meal.

 1. He got tired and bored and just gave up. 2. He is close to/ has began to go into shed and decided he actually didn't want it. 3.This rat might be a tad bit too big for him to eat. (even though he doesn't seem any bigger than the rats I gave him in the past two weeks). 

Any suggestions or advice on how long I should wait to try again and if there is anything I can do to make his success of catching him more successful? Thank you for your advice and help!

Ok, is this petty? Yes. I live in petty. It really bothers me that there is not a consistency between the common rooms/dorms. I don’t want them to look identical, but it just feels like they did not get the same level of care.
For example, only two of the houses (Slytherin and Hufflepuff) have 14 dormitories, aka enough for both of the gender selections for all 7 years. Gryffindor has 7, Ravenclaw has 8, and in both of them they have two fifth years, so it’s not like you can argue that maybe there is 1 door for both genders, and the door is smart enough to know which one you want. It’s just a small immersion thing that bothers me a little bit. Like, where would you sleep when you come back next year? For two houses I know. For two I don’t.
It also bothers me a little how some houses feel more flushed out than others. Ravenclaw has three distinct areas to sit (if we could sit), plus that secret tower area. Slytherin has a few seating areas, plus the windows where you can potentially meet the giant squid. Gryffindor has that really cool back stairwell, plus multiple sitting/lounging areas. Hufflepuff really just had the main sitting area and then you were in the dorms. There wasn’t a whole lot for you to engage with in their common room. Yes they had the kitchens near by, but everyone can go into the kitchens, so it’s not that big of a perk.
Also, the bathroom situation bothered me a little. Ravenclaw and Gryffindor have bathrooms (Gryffindor’s is only female, but it’s something). Slytherin has a bathroom outside the common room, which is a little impractical but again, it’s something. Hufflepuff… you better hope you don’t have to pee in the middle of the night because if you do you’re breaking into the prefects bathroom.
Again, it is small potatoes and I get that, but I just wish someone paid more attention to make sure each house got the same treatment. It feels kind of like the game favoured Ravenclaw and slytherin, Gryffindor got some attention because that’s Harry’s house, and Hufflepuffs got the short end of the stick, per usual. I just wish that someone would have said, hey here’s the basics each house has to have, and then went from there. Again, it’s petty, and I know that, but it is something that I find affects my house choice.

TL;DR at bottom.
I am of the generation that was told “you can do anything you set your mind to!”, “follow your dreams!”, etc. and while I’m old enough now to understand that there are a lot of barriers and systemic problems that stop people from following their dreams, I still hold on to a little shred of hope that I can achieve my life goals. I’ve managed to succeed in accomplishing some big life goals so I’m not devoid of hope. However, as my goals became a little less “mainstream”, I noticed more doubt and pushback from people when discussing my life plan. When that happens, I get little seeds of doubt in my own mind despite how passionate I am about achieving my dreams.
Backstory: My Partner and I have lived in the county in which we were both born. Never lived out of the state (in the US). We lost some loved ones during the pandemic. Others moved away. I started working remotely and realized we can live wherever we want. We don’t have to stay here. We want to leave the west coast for the east coast. (We have done our homework. Have flown out repeatedly to where we plan to live. Calculated costs. Etc. I’m a project planner. Spontaneity is not in my vocabulary.)
In our discussions about moving, we’ve broken down our ultimate goals into phases with phase one being “if this is all we accomplish, that is enough for me.” The remaining phases would just be icing on the cake.
Phase One: Buy our dream property.
We love being outdoors. Physically, mentally, we are people that crave green trees, gentle rains, nature sounds, and solitude among nature. We want to buy a house with a large area of wooded land. We want to have a garden (not feasible currently), let our dogs run to their heart’s content, and go for a hike whenever we want. If that is what the reminder of my life is, I will be as happy as a clam.
Phase two: Build and share. (Small business)
My partner has a background in homesteading/construction/set building and design. We want to build some primitive campsites, a yurt, small cabin on the property. Obviously we won’t be using these all the time. I want to offer them up for friends and family when they visit as well as putting them on HipCamp for vacation rentals. (I’ve done the research and had multiple conversations with hosts.) My Partner plans to construct a medieval style tavern. He wants to have a safe place anyone can come to for D&D games, cosplay, small wedding ceremonies, artist retreat, etc.
Phase three: Helping others. (Non profit)
I had an epiphany a few months ago. I believe I said out loud, “huh. I think this is my purpose in life.” I have been chronically ill with subsequent disabilities since I was a kid. I could not go camping. The outdoors just didn’t have the amenities I needed to enjoy my time in the woods. When I met my spouse, he slowly introduced me to camping, and I loved it! Every time we would go, he would take note of the things that made the trip difficult for me. Our next trip, he had solutions to make our adventures more accessible. That started with things like better air mattresses and warmer tents and evolved into a camper for a while. He made it easier for me to be disabled and still enjoy being outdoors.
I currently work for a nonprofit organization that supports people with intellectual and developmental disabilities (I/DD). We advocate for as much accessibility and independence as possible. Our mission statement and “culture of caring” is very personal to me and it will be difficult for me to leave that organization when we move. So I am inspired to take that mission with me.
Phase three would be continually working toward more accessible outdoor experiences for people with I/DD. We foresee making wheelchair accessible trails, modified fire pits, sensory friendly spaces, etc. Granted, it is camping so we will never be 100% accessible to everyone but we are going try to get as close as possible. I follow disabled travel bloggers and existing outdoor accessibility groups for inspiration and connections. I just want to create a space that is accessible for people who don’t normally get these kind of opportunities.
My roadblock right now is that despite my logic obsessed brain and feeling like I have a good plan, these life goals seem a bit outlandish to people I talk to. Now I don’t go around blabbering on to everyone about my goals but when people ask why we are moving so far away…well, see phases one through three. (Adding that this plan is only financial feasible east of the Rocky Mountains, hence the long distance move.)
We do have a good support system and people who are cheering us on. We have two very close friends that are talking about moving out east after we get settled and they actually want to help facilitate our dream. I know that should outweigh the few naysayers but it definitely hit me with some doubts. Mostly stemming from my own past failures but I’m aware of that. (Thanks therapy!) I have no intention of giving up on my life goals. I am very proud of the forethought and planning I have done thus far.
I don’t think I have one specific question. Just looking for relatable stories and how you feel about accomplishing big goals. Do you keep your ideas and plans to yourself? Do you want to share but feel like no one understands? What do you do to negate the doubts and keep moving forward?
I appreciate your input and your time. I am happy to answer questions as well. Definitely open to discussion and conversation.
TL;DR: Planning to move across the country to fulfill my “purpose” and life goals. Want to create accessible outdoor experience for people with disabilities. Getting some pushback and lack of understanding on why this is important to me. Do I stop sharing my goals with people? I don’t want to lose my motivation.

Hi guys! I recently got myself a used Triple S from my friend who bought it at Harrods. It's a size 43 but it feels pretty big, planning on wearing it tho, just rarely. Question is what size should I buy whenever I buy a new one fresh, there are 0 stores near me that sell Triple S's and I don't really plan on traveling anywhere soon so I won't be able to try one on for sometime.
My feet is goofy, my all time fav shoe YZY 500 feels perfect at size 44, YZY 700 feels ok at 44 (43 1/3 would be better with 700s) my adidas yung 1-96 are 43 1/3, my old cdg converses are 42.5 , my old air force 1 low is probably 42, I can't see the size tag because it's an 8 year old shoe the size tag is straight up just brown.
My feet is exactly 26.5 cm long from big toe to heel, measured the inside length of the size 43 Triple S it's around 28cm perfectly but feels extremely big, like I could fit a 1,6 cm lego brick at my heel and there was 2-3mms still (I was F-ing around a lot lol).
I'm thinking about 40-41 most probably size 41, don't think a 42 would be good either, size 43 really feels extremely big to be honest, it's ok after 10 minutes of walking but still hella goofy. Scared of 40 being too small but wanted to ask on this sub anyway.
Also found a size chart on the internet that says the difference between size 43 and 41 is just 1.5 cms, but I don't think the site has the proper measurements.

Okay so I remember pretty much nothing about it (I skimed through it cause i didn't like it) but I just wanna know the name of it. Basically mmc and his friends were so popular and cocky and the fmc was probably poor ? And it was constantly mentioned how slim-thick she was (her big boobs with small waist etc.) And like they had the whole enemies to lovers? They might have been also dealing drugs or something? Just getting into trouble a lot.