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i constantly feel neglected in my relationship. we have been together for 5 years and he tends to prioritize his friends over me. i'm not saying he can't spend it with his friends but the time frame seems a bit unfair and such overkill.
we're in a semi-long distance relationship, we barely see eachother for personal reasons. so we make time to hangout at night (since this is what works for us) through facetime. lately, it has been such a problem because i barely get to hangout with him because he's been dedicated to his friends. his day is dedicated to what he wants to do and it usually falls into gaming and spending it with his friends, i've calculated the hours and it falls down to around 8-10 hours on his time/friends. my calculated time is just 6-8 hours (on a good day) but sometimes it's only 3 hours or even just a good 45 minutes. my time is constantly being split into half and it gets frustrating because imagine you're looking forward to spending it with your SO and they don't feel the same, it becomes disappointing and such a let down. meanwhile on my end it seems like he cannot get enough of his friends, borderline obsessed maybe? the only time that i've noticed he voluntarily gets off is if either he knows he messed up or none of his friends are online or bored of the same game or has some form of bodily discomfort or just that one in a blue moon of wanting to hangout with me.
a couple of days ago, i've been noticing that our texts have become shorter and shorter and also dry. i just don't apply that much pressure by complaining daily and getting his attention to respond, so i usually just push it to the side and keep it moving. but on that day, it had been 5 hours and i haven't heard from him and i know what he's doing but it's also that he's actively sending tiktoks or liking posts on twitter but seems to be incapable of responding. i got upset and basically pushed him off and stopped responding. the next day i was still salty and we haven't texted at all that day but he's active on snapchat and twitter. not a word on my end. he called me but i didn't pick up because it seemed like bull since you've gone comfortably going about your day without saying a word. so i've been giving him the same energy and it seems that he got upset about it.
again it just seems unfair that he has all his time and energy towards other things/friends but it seems like i'm getting scrap, leftovers.
i know i'm going to get responses within the "break up with him" spectrum but i'm in it for the long run just don't want the easy way out. all relationships have different problems.
what should i do? i've given him solutions on how to better manage time but it just seems that it only works for a couple of days/weeks then it's back to square one.

(Ftm, 2months pp) I have always dreamed of breastfeeding as a mom. I realize now how much hard work it can be.. I am considering the possibility of quitting. Here is a little about our short journey..
Baby latched great immediately after birth, and in the hospital. Long story short, my baby stayed in the hospital and I wasn’t able to breastfeed much the first two weeks and he was bottle-fed formula. I did pump, not nearly enough apparently. My supply was legitimately on the low side, and definitely could not compete with the amount of formula he had been getting. Coming home, we have had occasional latching problems. He also falls asleep at the breast despite trying to keep him awake with breast compressions, etc. he has a major bottle preference even though we do paced bottle feeding. saw 2 different lactation consultants, who both said even though my milk was a little low, I could still phase out formula and just supplement with maybe 1 bottle in the evening while making the switch to ebf (my original goal). It went well, and I was able to ebf for a few days, and then I got mastitis (caused by a poor latch I think). I got a fever / chills, had to take antibiotics, the whole thing. After that my milk supply dipped significantly, so we were back to topping off with formula. (This was right at 6 weeks) So I have been breastfeeding, bottle feeding formula, then pumping as often as I could to get my supply up again. Everything was going well, trying to get off formula again, and then I became engorged (100% my fault, my baby slept through the night, so I didnt wake up either) and I was worried it would turn into mastitis again. It’s been 5 days, the pain has gotten a bit better but I have TONS of clogged ducts still. I have tried everything to fix it. (Dangle feeding, warm water in haaka, hands on nursing/pumping, cooling after feeding, hand expression you name it) now my baby is having trouble latching again (on one side). I have cracked nipples (one side was a milk bleb which opened, the other a kind of blister). The one nipple I cant get a good latch on is white, it looks like there is no circulation. It comes out misshapen when I trying to get him to feed in that side. It looks like his bottom lip in never flanged out, and I am having a hard time getting him to latch deeply, especially his bottom lip.
So here we are, we both end up crying. I feel unexplainably heartbroken that it looks like I cant continue breastfeeding. I want to continue so badly, but I’m not sure if it’s realistic at this point. I can’t keep up with nursing, bottle feeding formula and pumping. I wonder if my time would be better spent playing with him or reading books. Absolutely if there’s a chance I could provide more than half of his diet, I would keep trying.
What would you do in my situation? Is it hopeless? I feel like I am missing out in the joys of this stage because I an ways worried about breastfeeding. Is it possible to increase my supply a second time? I will be seeing a lactation consultant again, but until then I have to consider giving up altogether. It seems like everyone would be happier if I did, despite my dream to breastfeed for at least a year. I am willing to work hard at it, I just wonder if it is even worth it at this point.
Honest thoughts / advice, please?

Hello, I'm a 27 year old f who has a 2 f child and a 34 m husband. I met my husband when I was 19 and he was 26. At the time I still had my as I call child body and was pretty petite. At 5 foot 6 I weighed a little over 130 pounds. My husband has always struggled with his weight and at 5 foot 11 weight between 250 and 280 for most of our relationship.
Through out the relation ship I gained weight. I have been In school, including a medical program for litterly 10 years now with plans to finally be done next spring. We had a baby about 2 years ago and due to terrible pre eclampsia and helps syndrome I had high BP until about a year ago.
Anyways a year ago my husband began losing weight and is now down to 180pounds. Who h is the same amount I weight now. Honestly taking care of the tot, going to school FULL time, working an internship for school and then working 2 part time jobs my schedule is packed. I still make time to go to the gym 2 to 3 times a week for cycling and yoga. I did notice with cycling, my appitete has gone up.
I have been fine with my weight. Do I wish I could be smaller, sure. But, I just don't have time. My husband tells me I don't have to work, that he could support us but then will jokingly ask when I will be done with school to help out with the bills. We are also remodeling the house and guess whose been installing the sink, pulling up the floors, putting in new floors, me. He helps by spending time with the tot and watching her which is a huggggee help because I can't get anything done with her.
Abyways.earlier this week we were cleaning the basement when I brought up to him that recently he's been giving hints that he's not happy about my weight. Recently I was talking about my fitness goals, and I was telling myself in the bathroom my goals would be to do the splits and not have as much stiffness in my back when he pops in and says "don't be so hard on yourself you had a baby and your body changed." I let him know losing weight was not apart of my goal and he looked very perplexed.
Then recently he went to the Chocolate shop down the street and bought some. Chocolate covered oreos. Yes, I live in the USA. Anyways the next morning I went to have one and discovered they were all eaten. When I called him at lun h I mentioned I saw the empty carton and he said, "yeah I ate them all chocolate is my weakness and I feel terrible now." I told him, "oh, well I'm not watching my weight, so I could have eaten them guilt free haha." without missing a beat he goes, "I can tell." like damn it was funny but fucked up., right.
And he's always offering to help me lose weight but I'm honestly so busy, and I hate eeeeeee having to put every little thing I eat and every step I take and every exercise I do into a app. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I'm not even on my phone that much. I re gently found an old diary of mine and ever page logged my food, my water my exercise. And you know what guess what years later I weight even more. I'm not going to make excuses I have a terrible diet. My doctor told me my cortisol levels have been sky high since I was 15 and that the weight is just all the years of constant stress catching up to me.
Anyways, today my husband and I had a conversation where he told me he found me more attractive when I was skinny. I know he still loves me. But I honestly think at this point if I were to lose weight it would be more for him and not for me. I'm a good wife and a good mom. But I plugged my weight into that weight visualizer website and I guess it's worse then I thought.
Honestly I'm to busy to exercise and I hate hate hate hate hate having to keep track of everything. I'm not an organized person. And with school starting back up in the fall I know it will all be for naught. Has abyone else gone though this. I guess my plan is, once I get back into school to restart Adderall (I have been in it since my daughter was born) to lose the weight and to boost my produtivity, yes I do have a diagnoses and a prescription. But I'm just so frustrated.

GALATIANS  
Chapter Four (https://esv.literalword.com/?q=Galatians+4)
 
-3. … we were enslaved [משעבדים, MeShoo`eBahDeeYM] to fundamentals [ליסודות, LeeYÇODOTh] [of] the world.  

“The word τα στοιχεια [ta stoikheia], the elements ... meant (a) the letters of the alphabet… (b) the elements of which a thing was composed, as the fire, air, earth, and water of which the world was thought to be constituted; (c) the elements of the universe, the larger cosmos, including the sun, moon, planets, and stars; and (d) the spirits, angels, and demons which were believed to ensoul the heavenly bodies, traverse all space, and inhabit every nook and cranny of earth, particularly tombs, desert places, and demented persons. These spirits were said to be organized like human governments. In Rom. [Romans] 8:38 Paul calls them ‘principalities’ and ‘powers.’ And vss. [verses] 9 and 10 of our present chapter indicate that he has them in mind in vs. [verse] 3. …  
Paul … includes in ‘the elements of the universe’ all sub-Christian ideas and observances, both Jewish and Gentile. He regards these ‘elements’ as slave drivers who frighten men with curses for not propitiating them by observance of special days and seasons, food taboos, dietary fads, and circumcision. In Christ he declared his independence of Fate, Fortune, Luck, and Chance, and from astrology, the counterfeit religion and bastard sister of astronomy, whose practitioners exploited the superstition that the stars controlled men’s lives from birth to death.” (Stamm, 1953, TIB vol. X pp. 521 & 522)  
“The elements of the world] A mere Jewish phrase, יסודי עולם הזה yasudey ‘olam hazzeh, ‘the principles of this world;’ that is, the rudiments or principles of the Jewish religion. The apostle intimates that the law was not the science of salvation; it was only the elements or alphabet of it.” (Clarke, 1831, vol. II p. 387)  

-4. But [אבל, ’ahBahL] as that was filled the time, sent forth, Gods, [את, ’ehTh (indicator of direct object; no English equivalent)] His son, born [of] woman, and subject [וכפוף, VeKhahPhOoPh] to instruction [Torah, Law].  

“The four words, το πληρωμα του χρονου [to pleroma tou khronou], the fullness of the time, express a whole philosophy of history. The Hebrew prophets and Jewish apocalyptists believed that their God was the creator of the universe and arbiter of the destinies of all men and nations. Nothing could happen that was not his doing, either directly or indirectly through angels and men. He had a time for everything, and everything happened exactly on time. … The completion of this present age would be marked by a blood-red revolution, in which all good men and good works would be ground under the heel of the tyrant, while the wicked reigned supreme. Then suddenly God would intervene with the lightning of judgment to snatch the world from the mouth of the bottomless pit and restore it to Paradise, whence it had fallen with the sin of Adam. Sorrow and sighing would flee away, and the Messiah would reign with the perfection of a theocratic king.  
At this juncture, says Paul, when the appointed period of history was ‘full,’ god sent his Son γενομενον εκ γυναικος, γενομενον υπο νομον [genomenon ek gunaikos, genomenon upο nomon], ‘born of woman, bοrn under law.’ … Jesus was not only born under law, but was subject to it all his life. ...The ‘yoke’ of the Torah demanded that he observe the customs of his forefathers, such as wearing phylactery and prayer fringes, ceremonial washing of hands before eating, giving thanks at mealtime, praying at stated times, bringing tithes and sacrifices, and obeying the Ten Commandments.” (Stamm, 1953, TIB vol. X pp. 522 & 523)  
Not to mention circumcision, kashrut, and the prohibition of associating with gentiles.  
“Sent forth refers to God’s sending of his Son from his pre-existent state in heaven (I Cor. [Corinthians] 8:6; Phil. [Philippians] 2:6-8; Col. [Colossians] 1:15-17). Yet this Son was born of woman. There is nothing in these words, or elsewhere in Paul’s letters, to prove or disprove that he knew the story of the miraculous conception. His point here is that the Christ, although he was the pre-existent Son of God, did not come into this world with a body composed of celestial substance, but was woman-born like all other human beings. … It was very different from the conception of royal sonship in Ps. 2, where the king is called God’s ‘Son; because he has been chosen to be the Messiah. In Paul, Jesus is God’s Son by nature, and his Christhood follows by virtue of this sonship. This belief was the fundamental cause of the split between the Jews and the Christians. The lowly birth, the obscurity of Nazareth, and the fact that Jesus was a common laborer, constituted a grievous scandal in the eyes of all who were expecting their Deliverer to come riding on a chariot of clouds wielding the lightning of judgment. Paul’s gospel contradicts every form of hyperspirituality that fixes a gulf between God and his material world. On the other hand, his conception of the coming of Jesus was poles removed from the pagan stories of the births of heroes, savior-gods, and kings, whose legends were freighted with illicit relationships and lawless conduct like the lives of the devotees who had created them in their own image.” (Stamm, 1953, TIB vol. X pp. 523-524)  
“Nothing is said explicitly about the Son’s preexistence, which is at most implied … born of a woman: … The phrase is derived from the OT [Old Testament, the Hebrew Bible] (Job 14:1 …). So born, Jesus submitted to the law by being circumcised and thus became capable of falling under its curse. But lest the Galatians draw a wrong conclusion, Paul [and The Interpreters’ Bible] does not mention Jesus’ circumcision. Instead of genomenon, ‘born,’ some patristic writers read gennomenon, and understood this ptc. [participle] as referring to Mary’s virginal conception; but this is anachronistic interpretation.” (Joseph A. Fitzmyer, 1990, TNJBC p. 787)  

-7. Accordingly [לפיכך, LePheeYKhahKh], you are not [אינך, ’aYNKhah] a slave anymore [אוד, ’OD], for if [כי אם, KeeY ’eeM] a son, and, if a son, then [אזי, ’ahZahY] also heir from favor [מטעם, MeeTah`ahM] [of] Gods.  

“This is Paul’s proclamation of emancipation.” (Stamm, 1953, TIB vol. X p. 528)  

…………………………………………  
Worry of Shah’OoL to Galatians
[verses 8–20]  

-8. In [the] past, in a time that you did not know [את, ’ehTh] Gods, you slaved [את, ’ehTh] who that in their nature [שבמנהותם, ShehBeMahHOoThahM] were not Gods.  

“The Jews never ceased to ridicule idols and denounce idolaters… They demoted the old gods to the rank of demons and made a list of detractive names for them: angels, shepherds, princes; kings, emperors, benefactors, heroes; demons, personifications, idols, nonentities. Some were living, some dead; some were good, but were not God. Most of them were bad, and their idols were but images of ‘things of nought.’ …  
Paul did not deny the existence of these beings whose ignorant worshipers called them gods, but he declared that they did not partake of the nature of God (I Cor. 8:4-6). God permitted them to plague mankind to punish sin, especially the sin of participating in the sacraments of the Gentile cults (I Cor. 10:19-22; 11:28-31). But Christ had conquered them and no Christian needed to fear them.” (Stamm, 1953, TIB vol. X p. 529)  

-10. Behold, you are honoring days and new-[moons], seasons [מועדים, MO`ahDeeYM] and years.  

“Days like the Sabbath and Yom hakkippurim [“Day of Atonement”] are meant; months like the ‘new moon’; seasons like Passover and Pentecost; years like the sabbatical years… Paul can see no reason for a Gentile Christian to observe these.” (Joseph A. Fitzmyer, 1990, TNJBC p. 788)  

…  

…………………………………………  

Two the covenants
[verses 21-26]  

-21. Say to me, you, the wanters to be subject to Instruction, have you not heard [את, ’ehTh] the Instruction?
-22. Is it not written that to ’ahBRahHahM there were two sons, the one from the maid [האמה, Hah’ahMaH] and the second from the woman the free [החפשיה, HahHahPhSheeYah]?
-23. But [אך, ’ahKh] [the] son [of] the maid was born according to [לפי, LePheeY] the flesh,
and however [ואילו, Ve’eeYLOo] [the] son [of] the free upon mouth of the promise.
-24. The words the these, they are a parable to two the covenants:
the one from Mount ÇeeNah-eeY [Sinai], the birther to slavery, and she is HahGahR [“The Sojourner”, Hagar].  

“It is well known how fond the Jews were of allegorizing; every thing in the law was with them an allegory: their Talmud [ancient commentary] is full of these; and one of their most sober and best educated writers Philo, abounds with them…  
It is very likely, therefore, that the allegory produced here; St. Paul had borrowed from the Jewish writings; and he brings it in to convict the Judaizing Galatians on their own principles: and neither he, nor we, have any thing farther to do with this allegory, than as it applies to the subject for which it is quoted; nor does it give any license to those men of vain and superficial minds, who endeavour to find out allegories in every portion of the Sacred Writings; and by what they term spiritualizing, which is more properly carnalizing, have brought the testimonies of God into disgrace. May the spirit of silence be poured out upon all such corrupters of the word of God!” (Clarke, 1831, vol. II p. 390)  
“Allegorical interpretation rests upon the belief that every word, figure of speech, and grammatical form in scripture has a special ‘spiritual’ significance besides its literal meaning. The theory is that the God who dictated it meant more than rests on the surface and that while he said one thing, he also meant something else in addition to the literal sense… The Greeks had long since applied the method to explain away the immoral things which the gods said and did in Homer… Then Greek-speaking Jews, like Philo Judaeus, employed it apologetically to read Greek philosophy into the O.T. [Old Testament, the Hebrew Bible], proclaiming that Moses had said all these good things long before and better than Homer and Plato.  
The wonder is that Paul has so little allegory. His restraint is explained partly by his training as a Pharisee. The rabbis were suspicious of any interpretation of scripture that tended to make Jews lax in their observance of the law. Jews with Gnostic leanings, and those who considered some of their ancestral customs outmoded, could resort to allegory to justify their philosophy and conduct, while maintaining that they were the spiritual superiors of the conservatives who held to the letter of the law … His argument, however, is never strengthened by allegorical symbolism and typology, for these are convincing only to those who by imagination can find them so. Rather, as in Rom. 9-11, he introduces unnecessary complications such as the moral difficulties involved in predestination. His gospel does not rest on the quicksands of allegory, a specious method of interpreting scripture. Its interpretations are of interest to the historian not as correct representations of what the writers and first readers of the Bible had in mind, but only as source materials for understanding the life and thought of the allegorists themselves.” (Stamm, 1953, TIB vol. X p. 540)  

-25. Hagar signifies [מסמלת, MeÇahMehLeTh] [את, ’ehTh] Mount ÇeeNah-eeY, that is in Arabia, and parallels [ומקבילה,OoMahQBeeYLaH] to Jerusalem of our day, for she is in slavery with her sons.  

“… why does Paul mention Arabia…? Possibly because Mt. Sinai is in Arabia[?], which is Ishmaelite territory; he thus associates the Sinai pact with the eponymous patriarch of Arab tribes … Paul thus suggests that the law itself stems from a situation extrinsic to the promised land and to the real descendants of Abraham. Paul’s Jewish former co-religionists would not have been happy with this allegory.” (Joseph A. Fitzmyer, 1990, TNJBC p. 788)  

-26. But [אבל, ’ahBahL] Jerusalem from ascended [מעלה, Mah`eLaH], [the] daughter [of] freedom [חורין, HOReeYN] is she, and she is mother to us.
 

“The Jerusalem which now is was a most unholy “Holy city”, full of injustice, violence and murder, and subject to the cruel and wicked rulers imposed by a Gentile empire. But over against this Jerusalem of slavery lay an ideal celestial city, unseen at present, but destined soon to supersede it. Paul called it the Jerusalem above. Sarah, the free-woman, was the ancestress of its citizens, who were the people of faith and of freedom in Christ…  
Paul speaks of Jerusalem above, because this new city of freedom already exists in heaven where Christ is, where dwell the souls of those who have died in Christ. But it also exists on earth as the church, the body of Christ, whose members are colonists from heaven sent to prepare men for the full establishment of God’s kingdom at Christ’s second coming (Phil. 3:20; Col. 3:1-3).  
The biblical root of this conception of an ideal future and heavenly Jerusalem is Isa. [Isaiah] 54. Other descriptions appear in Ezek. [Ezekiel] 40-48; Zech. [Zechariah] 2:1-13; Hag. [Haggai] 2:6-9; Tob. [Tobias] 13:9-18 Ecclus. [Ecclesiasticus] 36; Pss. Sol. [Psalms of Solomon] 17:33. Historically the expectation assumed three forms. According to the earliest hope, God would build the new Jerusalem in Palestine and make it the capital of his theocratic world government. The plan of this glorious city was graven upon the palms of his hands (Isa. 49:16). From this idea it was but a step, especially for those influenced by Greek ideas, to think of this ideal Jerusalem as already existing in heaven. According to the Apocalypse of Baruch, God had shown it to Adam in Paradise before he sinned; to Abraham on the night mentioned in Gen. 15:12-21; and to Moses on Sinai, when he gave him the heavenly pattern for an earthly tabernacle (II Baruch 4:1-6; cf. [compare with] Heb. [Hebrews]12:22). The third conception combined these two ideas. The Jerusalem which was ‘above’ would come down to earth to be established in Palestine in place of the city that ‘now is’ (cf. Rev. [Revelation] 3:12, 21:2; II Esdras 7:26; 13:36; 10:54).  
So the new Jerusalem belonged to both worlds and to both ages, to heaven and earth, to the present and the future. Its constitution was the new covenant, and its citizens were the men of faith in Christ, a new kind of freemen who traced their spiritual ancestry through the line of Isaac and his mother Sarah as heirs of God’s promise to Abraham. As for Ishmael and his tribe, they were the men of law, predestined to be slaves forever. Needless to say, the Judaizers found Paul’s allegorical exclusion of themselves utterly unacceptable. They believed that the Torah was God’s blueprint for all creation, and that it would be observed forever in the new Jerusalem. That, they said, was why God was going to purge the old city – to establish an order of life in which perfect obedience to his law would be possible.” (Stamm, 1953, TIB vol. X pp. 541-542)  
“…it was a maxim among the rabbins [rabbis], that, ‘Whatsoever was in the earth, the same was also found in heaven; for there is no matter, howsoever small, in this world, that has not something similar to it in the spiritual world.’ On this maxim, the Jews imagine that every earthly thing has its representative in heaven: and especially whatever concerns Jerusalem, the law, and its ordinances. Rab. ["Master", Rabbi] Kimchi, speaking of Melchisedec, king of Salem, says, זו ירושלים של מעלה Zu Yerushalem shel me’alah – ‘This is the Jerusalem that is from above.’…  
There is a spiritual Jerusalem, of which this is the type; and this Jerusalem, in which the souls of all the righteous are, is free from all bondage and sin: or by this, probably the kingdom of the Messiah was intended; and this certainly answers best to the apostle’s meaning, as the subsequent verse shows.” (Clarke, 1831, vol. II p. 391)  

-27. That see, is written:  
“Chant, barren, not birthing, [רני עקרה לא ילדה RahNeeY 'ahQRaH Lo’ YahLahDaH] burst chanting and shouting, not travailing, [פצחי רנה וצהלי לא-חלה PeeTsHeeY ReeNaH VeTsahHahLeeY Lo’-HahLaH] for multitudinous are sons of her deserted than [מי, MeeY] sons of her mistress [כי-רבים בני-שוממיה מבני בעולה KheeY-RahBeeYM BeNaY-ShoMahMeeYHah MeeBeNaY Be'ooLaH].”  

“A telling item in the counterpropaganda of the legalists was the argument that even among the Christians only a radical fringe consisting mainly of foreign Jews, of whom Paul was one, were proposing to abandon the law of Moses. …  
In one respect his quotation of Isa. 54:1 does not fit Paul’s allegory. It was Sarah, the mother of freemen, who possessed the husband, and Hagar, the slave, who was the deserted woman. As usual with Paul’s illustrations (cf. Rom. 7:1-4; 11:17-24), the details cannot be pressed without making them go lame …  
The Isaian figure to describe the plight of Jerusalem during the Babylonian exile grew out of a common experience in Hebrew family life. Childlessness, particularly the failure to bear sons, was great grief and disgrace. Such was the sorrow of Jerusalem; but the prophet bade her look forward with courage to the time when all her scattered children would come back to her (Isa. 54:3). God was her ‘husband,’ and he would treat his faithful remnant with everlasting lovingkindness, making them more numerous than the former population and giving them a heritage of great peace and prosperity (Isa. 54:13-17).” (Stamm, 1953, TIB vol. X p. 542)  
“The prophet’s words are addressed to deserted Zion, bidding it rejoice at the return of the exiles.” (Joseph A. Fitzmyer, 1990, TNJBC p. 788)  

-28. But you, my brethren [τεχνα, tekhna, “children”], you are the sons of the promise, as was YeeTsHahQ [“He Laughed”, Isaac].  

“The Judaizers claimed that Abraham had obeyed the law of Moses by anticipation, and that God’s promise was his reward. Consequently the descendants of Isaac were children of promise only if they followed Abraham’s example in obeying the law. Paul turned it the other way about: the promise must be taken on faith, not as credit for obedience.” (Stamm, 1953, TIB vol. X p. 542)  

-29. And just as [וכשם, OoKhShayM] that then pursued, [רדף, RahDahPh] the son that was born according to [לפי, LePheeY] flesh, [את, ’ehTh] the son that was born according to the spirit, yes, also now.  

“In Gen 21:10 Sarah, seeing Ishmael ‘playing’ with Isaac and viewing him as the potential rival to Isaac’s inheritance, drives him and his mother out. Nothing in Gen is said of Ishmael’s ‘persecution’ of Isaac, but Paul may be interpreting the ‘playing’ as did a Palestinian haggadic explanation of Gen 21:9 (see Josephus, ANT. [Antiquities] 1.12.3§215 …” (Joseph A. Fitzmyer, 1990, TNJBC p. 788)  
“A rabbinical tradition of the second century A.S. interprets the Hebrew participle מצחק [MeeTsHahQ, “play”] (LXX [Septuagient, the ancient Greek translation of the Hebrew Bible] παιζοντα [paizonta] in Gen. 21:9 to mean that Ishmael’s ‘playing’ became so rough that Isaac’s life was in danger. This son of a slave is said to have shot arrows at Isaac to kill him, and Paul’s statement shows that some such tradition was current in his day. He applied it to the Judaizers who were trying to force the Christians to observe the whole law of Moses, and to the unbelieving Jews who were excommunicating the Christians and their families and getting them into trouble with the civil authorities (1:5; 4:17; 5:10; I Thess. [Thessalonians] 2:14-16).” (Stamm, 1953, TIB vol. X p. 543)  

-30. But what says the Written [Scripture]?  
“Banish [גרש GahRaySh] the maid and [את, ’ehTh] her son,
for not will inheritI [יירש, YeeYRahSh], son [of] the maid [האמה, Hah’ahMaH], with son [of] the free.”  

“The quotation is from Gen. 21:10 … The speaker of these words is Sarah, who is filled with rage against Hagar and Ishmael. Abraham is represented as greatly grieved, but God is said to have sanctioned the demand of the cruel and jealous wife….  
This story was one of the effects and one of the causes of the perpetual feud between the Israelites and the tribes that descended from Ishmael. The Hebrews were so sure that God wanted them to have Palestine that they found no moral difficulty in saying that it was God himself who had overruled Abraham’s conscience (Gen. 17:18-21). They affirmed that Ishmael’s character and destiny had been predetermined (Gen. 16:12). Consequently, even his circumcision at the age of thirteen could not make him a member of God’s chosen people. However great this innocent victim of a family feud might become by virtue of the halfhearted blessing conceded by an uneasy conscience (Gen. 17:20-21), he and his descendants were barred forever from the higher blessing. Theirs was to submit to the religious imperialism of the most favored nation or die. Moreover, all Abraham’s other sons except Isaac were barred from the promise and sent away ‘unto the east country’ (Gen. 25:5-6). And yet while all this was said to be the Lord’s doing, it was in the same breath declared to be the doing of the human actors in this drama of the nations. Sarah herself was said to have suggested that Abraham become a father by her Egyptian slave girl. Then, too, it was explained that Hagar’s flight from the cruelty of her mistress was voluntary, making her, rather than the callous compliance of Abraham, responsible for her plight ‘in the wilderness, by the fountain in the way to Shur’ (Gen. 16:7).  
Paul’s use of Abraham’s expulsion of Hagar and her child has its parallel in the equally heartless treatment of Esau which he employs in Rom. 9-11 in his longer discussion of the divine process of selection. Here too it was assumed that the hatred generated by centuries of war for the possession of Palestine lay in the heart of God. “I hate Esau,” said Malachi (1:3), making God the speaker; and Rom. 9:6-13 presses it to the utmost limit of predestination. But the love of God in Christ Jesus made Paul’s heart better than his inherited doctrine … When the history of the struggle for the possession of “the Holy land” is allegorized to justify a doctrine of “election” which foredooms countless souls to an eternity of torment in a future hell, it becomes as morally atrocious as it is irreconcilable with Paul’s gospel.  
Nevertheless Paul’s allegory gives the historian an insight into Paul’s mind as he wrestled with the insoluble problem of God’s sovereignty and human freedom.” (Stamm, 1953, TIB vol. X pp. 543-544)  
“Paul bids the Galatians rid themselves of the Judaizers – and, ironically enough, obey the Torah itself.” (Joseph A. Fitzmyer, 1990, TNJBC p. 788)   An Amateur's Journey Through the Bible

1. Digital Logic With Feedback. Multivibrators

With simple gate and combinational logic circuits, there is a definite output state for any given input state. For instance: For each of the four possible combinations of input states (0-0, 0-1, 1-0, and 1- 1), there is one, definite, unambiguous output state. However, if we alter this gate circuit so as to give signal feedback from the output to one of the inputs, the outcome is a little bit different: Since the output feeds back to one of the OR gate’s inputs, and we know that any 1 input to an OR gates makes the output 1, this circuit will “latch” in the 1 output state after any time that A is 1. When A is 0, the output could be either 0 or 1, depending on the circuit’s prior state. The proper way to complete the above truth table would be to insert the word latch in place of the question mark, showing that the output maintains its last state when A is 0. Any digital circuit employing feedback is called a multivibrator. The example above was what is called a bistable multivibrator. It is called “bistable” because it can hold stable in one of two possible output states, either 0 or 1. There are also monostable multivibrators, which have only one stable output state (that other state being momentary); and astable multivibrators, which have no stable state (oscillating back and forth between an output of 0 and 1). A very
simple astable multivibrator is an inverter with the output fed directly back to the input: 9.1. The S-R Latch A bistable multivibrator has two stable states, as indicated by the prefix bi in its name. Typically, one state is referred to as set and the other as reset. The simplest bistable device, therefore, is known as a set-reset, or S-R, latch. To create an S-R latch, we can wire two NOR gates in such a way that the output of one feeds back to the input of another, and vice versa, like this: The same multivibrator function can be implemented in ladder logic, with the same results:
In a bistable multivibrator, the condition of Q=1 and not-Q=0 is defined as set. A condition of Q=0 and not-Q=1 is conversely defined as reset. If Q and not-Q happen to be forced to the same state (both 0 or both 1), that state is referred to as invalid. In an S-R latch, activation of the S input sets the circuit, while activation of the R input resets the circuit. If both S and R inputs are activated simultaneously, the circuit will be in an invalid condition. 9.2. The Gated S-R Latch It is sometimes useful in logic circuits to have a multivibrator which changes state only when certain conditions are met, regardless of its S and R input states. The conditional input is called the enable, and is symbolized by the letter E or sometimes EN. When the E=0, the outputs of the two AND gates are forced to 0, regardless of the states of either S or R. Consequently, the circuit behaves as though S and R were both 0, latching the Q and not-Q outputs in their last states. Only when the enable input is activated (1) will the latch respond to the S and R inputs. In ladder logic the function looks like this:
The S-R gated latch symbol is shown below: 9.3. The D Latch A D latch is like an S-R latch with only one input: the “D” input. Activating the D input sets the circuit, and de-activating the D input resets the circuit. Of course, this is only if the enable input (E) is activated as well. Otherwise, the output(s) will be latched, unresponsive to the state of the D input. The ladder logic of this function looks like this:
The standard symbol of a D Latch is shown below: D latches can be used as 1-bit memory circuits, storing either a “high” or a “low” state when disabled, and “reading” new data from the D input when enabled. 9.4. Edge-triggered Latches: Flip-Flops A flip-flop is a latch circuit with a “pulse detector” circuit connected to the enable (E) input, so that it is enabled only for a brief moment on either the rising or falling edge of a clock pulse. Pulse detector circuits may be made from time-delay relays for ladder logic applications, or from semiconductor gates (exploiting the phenomenon of propagation delay).
The ladder logic version looks like this: The symbols for flip-flops look like this: The triangle symbol next to the clock inputs tells us that these are edge- triggered devices, and consequently that these are flip-flops rather than latches. The symbols above are positive edge-triggered: that is, they “clock” on the rising edge (low-to-high transition) of the clock signal. Negative edge- triggered devices are symbolized with a bubble on the clock input line:
9.5. The J-K Flip-Flop Another variation on a theme of bistable multivibrators is the J-K flip-flop. Essentially, this is a modified version of an S-R flip-flop with no “invalid” or “illegal” output state. A J-K flip-flop is nothing more than an S-R flip-flop with an added layer of feedback. This feedback selectively enables one of the two set/reset inputs so that they cannot both carry an active signal to the multivibrator circuit, thus eliminating the invalid condition. When both J and K inputs are activated, and the clock input is pulsed, the outputs (Q and not-Q) will swap states. That is, the circuit will toggle from a set state to a reset state or vice versa.
The ladder logic equivalent looks like this: The symbols for J-K Flip-Flops are shown below:
9.6. Asynchronous Flip-Flops Inputs Asynchronous inputs on a flip-flop have control over the outputs (Q and not-Q) regardless of clock input status. These inputs are called the preset (PRE) and clear (CLR). The preset input drives the flip-flop to a set state while the clear input drives it to a reset state. It is possible to drive the outputs of a J-K flip- flop to an invalid condition using the asynchronous inputs, because all feedback within the multivibrator circuit is overridden. 9.7. Monostable Multivibrators A monostable multivibrator has only one stable output state. The other output state can only be maintained temporarily. Monostable multivibrators, sometimes called one-shots, come in two basic varieties: retriggerable and nonretriggerable. One-shot circuits with very short time settings may be used to debounce the “dirty” signals created by mechanical switch contacts.

My mom passed away in March of this year. Her and my step father where married when I was 13, Iam now almost 33. My mother had cancer. For 6 years she took that battle on. She took care of her brother who also died from cancer, her mother who died a couple years ago.. She took care of everyone.
Recently. Since her passing so much has happened. Im blinsided, but also seeing things I had been blind too in the past.
My mom and I where close, and in the end while working full time and being a full time nursing student anytime asked I dropped things to be there to sit with my mom when she was having a hard morning.
It's been almost 3 months since her passing. My step father has already has a woman over in the house my mom paid for with money from her late mother. He was telling me a month ago that he is only human and has not had sex in years and needs to not be alone or he will fall apart.
​
He has also not txted any of us kids since my moms passing. For awhile until he told me he needed a woman , I was checking in on him everyday. But its not recipracated.
​
I know my mother handled everything growing up. She worked hard and also came from some money from her parents, who also worked hard. My mom paid for everything. Now that she is gone.. He is being very distant. I get he may be hurting... But so am I... and my siblings...
​
I dont know how to handle this. How to approch my step dad about my mothers estate/will which he has not probated yet. I checked.
​
I know there are things.. like trusts my uncle left for my kid and my siblings kids to use for colllege. All of my grandparent things, my papps naval uniform, my great nanas pearls.. even some of my moms ashes, these are things my mom spoke to me about before she passed that would go to us kids..
​
the non bias help I need to urgent...
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My mind is killing me.

https://polaris.brighterir.com/public/tomco/news/rns/story/ryemg9w
https://www.tomcoenergy.com/investors/regulatory-news/
RNS Number : 7221B TomCo Energy PLC 06 June 2023
6 June 2023
TOMCO ENERGY PLC
("TomCo" or the "Company")
Update re TSHII
TomCo Energy plc (AIM: TOM), the US operating oil development group focused on using innovative technology to unlock unconventional hydrocarbon resources, provides an update with respect to the Company's 100% owned subsidiary, Greenfield Energy LLC's ("Greenfield"), potential acquisition of the remaining ownership and membership rights and interests in Tar Sands Holdings II LLC ("TSHII") (the "Membership Interests"). As previously announced, Greenfield owns a 10% Membership Interest in TSHII and holds an exclusive option (the "Option"), exercisable at its sole discretion, to acquire the remaining 90% of the Membership Interests for additional cash consideration which was scheduled to expire on 30 April 2023 (the "Agreement").
Further to the Company's announcement of 2 May 2023, it has agreed with the counterparty certain amendments to the Agreement such that Greenfield now has an option, at its sole discretion, to acquire the remaining 90% of the Membership Interests for additional cash consideration of US$17.25 million (formerly US$16.25 million) prior to 6.00 p.m. Salt Lake City Time on 31 December 2023 together with a matching right as described further below.
It has been agreed that the counterparty may, from 1 July 2023, market its remaining 90% of the Membership Interests or TSHII's assets to third parties on at least as favourable terms as set out in the abovementioned amended Agreement. In the event that the counterparty receives a bona fide offer to purchase the remaining 90% of the Membership Interests or TSHII's assets from a third party, Greenfield shall have 30 days from the date of notice of such offer to match or exceed such offer and to provide payment of US$100,000 towards the purchase price, providing closing of such transaction occurs prior to 31 December 2023.
The Company remains in discussions to secure a potential funding package for Greenfield, that would, inter alia, enable Greenfield to ultimately exercise the amended Option and pursue its previously announced wider development plans. In this regard, the principal route under active consideration would involve TomCo disposing of a majority stake in Greenfield to a partner(s) in return for, inter alia, certain upfront cash consideration, a continuing minority equity participation for TomCo in Greenfield (without the requirement for further capital contributions from TomCo) and the provision of a sizeable funding package to Greenfield. Any such proposed disposal would likely constitute a fundamental disposal for TomCo pursuant to the provisions of Rule 15 of the AIM Rules for Companies and therefore be subject, inter alia, to the approval of TomCo's shareholders at a duly convened general meeting. In such eventuality, it would fall to the new majority owner(s) of Greenfield to decide whether or not to exercise the amended Option post completion of such proposed disposal. There can be no certainty that such funding proposal will ultimately be successfully concluded or as to the precise terms or structure of any such funding package or alternative financing arrangements for Greenfield. Further announcements will be made in due course as appropriate.
Enquiries:
TomCo Energy plc
Malcolm Groat (Chairman) / John Potter (CEO) +44 (0)20 3823 3635
Strand Hanson Limited (Nominated Adviser)
James Harris / Matthew Chandler +44 (0)20 7409 3494
Novum Securities Limited (Broker)
Jon Belliss / Colin Rowbury +44 (0)20 7399 9402
IFC Advisory Limited (Financial PR)
Tim Metcalfe / Florence Chandler +44 (0)20 3934 6630
For further information, please visit www.tomcoenergy.com.
The information contained within this announcement is deemed by the Company to constitute inside information as stipulated under the Market Abuse Regulation (EU) No. 596/2014 as it forms part of United Kingdom domestic law by virtue of the European Union (Withdrawal) Act 2018, as amended by virtue of the Market Abuse (Amendment) (EU Exit) Regulations 2019.
This information is provided by RNS, the news service of the London Stock Exchange. RNS is approved by the Financial Conduct Authority to act as a Primary Information Provider in the United Kingdom. Terms and conditions relating to the use and distribution of this information may apply. For further information, please contact [email protected] or visit www.rns.com.
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END
UPDUVVKROAUNRAR

our hero awakens back at 2fort
Snow: (sits up) god my spleen hurts… (takes a look around) hey, how did I get back here?
Engineer: ah, glad to see you’re awake (sticks his head out the door) hey boys, He’s awake
the rest of RED, along with Sonia, MS, and a white unicorn with purple shades walk in
MS: glad to see you’re awake buddy
Snow: glad to be awake, but on to more pressing matters, what actually happened?
Sonia: well long story short epic flashback transition we had scrapped the last of the robots, but unfortunately the elements of harmony were taken captive by the robots, and they were already making their leave
MS: (cutting in) I figured the best way to catch up to them would be by trying that conveniently labeled “plane” button on your sandwhich car thing, but someone (glares at Sonia) suggested using a giant catapult to launch you at them, which you both agreed on even though there was only a 25% chance of success
Sonia: and that meant there was a 25% chance of something interesting happening, and it worked mind you
MS: if by work, you mean he misses, bounces off a trampoline, and gets his head stuck in the ship’s hull, then yeah, I’d say it is worked
Sonia: you know-
Scout: Hey chucklenuts, can you stop bickering like an old married couple and finish the story?
(They both sigh and say fine begrudgingly)
MS: after that had happened, you managed to pull your head out and tried to cut your way inside
Sonia: unfortunately, they had defenses on those ships, so they transferred all the power of their hull shocks, which caused you to go haywire and fall at least 5 miles
MS: then they fired a type-9 laser cannon at you (as an internal monologue, a single shot can wipe out a multiverse, and the stickonians aren’t to keen on sharing their weapons, so I wonder how they got their hands on them in the first place) at least 10 times (pauses for a moment), I lost count to be honest
Sonia: then they dropped the ship on you, several times might I add, then they chucked your body off the nearby cliff
Snow: wait wait wait, you both saw all of thisand chose to just stand there and watch me get obliterated?
MS: yes and no, we could’ve done something, but then the plot would become a lot more dull
Sonia: plus we’d have to give the mane 6 speaking roles, which would’ve destroyed our budget
Snow: I guess that’s fair…
(The white unicorn objects) um… excuse me, what’s all this talk about a “plot” and a “budget?”
Snow: oh yeah, that reminds me, who exactly are you?
To be continued, but again

Who else thinks that they should have added Coop earlier in season eight so that his and Phoebe's romance could actually have time to develop. Like he was in a total of what like 6 episodes (possibly 8 I don't remember exactly). I mean at least Henry was introduced earlier in the season and he and Paige had time to fall in love. But with Coop he introduced himself to Phoebe helped her believe in love and then within two episodes he's falling in love with her. I mean I get that the series was ending and the writers wanted Phoebe to have a happy ending so they decided to pair her off with Coop. But like they didn't even have any time to develop their relationship. They should have introduced him right around the same time that they introduced Henry to Paige. At least then it would make sense if Phoebe and Coop fall in love since they would've known each other for a couple of months not a week or two. But that's just me what do you guys think should they have introduced Coop's character earlier in season 8 than when they introduced him originally?

Hi everyone,
My husband and I have been together for almost 4 years, married for 2, and we have an almost 6 month old son. We have struggled with communication and intimacy from pretty early on in our relationship, but we stuck it out and found our way through. I have also struggled with mental health issues for a while now, and my progress has definitely not been linear since 2019 due to a somewhat traumatic break-up with a previous partner, undiagnosed bipolar ll and ADHD, a toxic work environment that I was tied to by contract, and then the pandemic lockdown.
The last year or so has been particularly difficult between me and my husband. He has become increasingly frustrated with my regressions and setbacks when it comes to my mental health. While I was still pregnant, we got in a really big fight about my issues around self esteem and my concerns about my postpartum body. He was angry because he took my worries about my looks as me not believing him when he tells me he loves me regardless of how I look and that he thinks I’m beautiful at any size or shape. He basically insinuated that I was calling him a liar and that I don’t trust him or listen to him or care about our relationship enough to fix my issues. He ended up leaving for the night and staying at a hotel. We talked it out and got to a better place after that, but it all went to hell again once our son was born.
Long story short, when our son was about 2 months old, we ended up having to cut my mother-in-law out of our lives due to her causing a huge fight on the DAY our son was born and turning other family members against us, as well as her continued emotionally and verbally abusive treatment toward my husband. This sent him into a mental health spiral, and it turned him into a different person.
He started blaming his own issues with depression and anxiety as well as our issues with communication and intimacy over the last 4 years all on me and my mental health. He called me horrible things (bitch, cunt, idiot, moron, slut, etc.), used painful memories of the traumatic break-up as well as sexual assault against me, and threatened to divorce me and make sure I never see our son again if I “don’t get my shit together.”
We eventually talked about the way he spoke to me and how completely unacceptable it was. He apologized, said he was ashamed of himself, and promised to stop. He did try to justify it though and said that he was doing it because the emotional damage I caused him with my personal struggles was just as painful as the words he used against me. He told me he was so upset and felt so disrespected that he didn’t care anymore if he hurt my feelings. It got better for a little while, but he’s been slipping up recently. We also talked about ways we were going to work on our communication and intimacy and ways I was going to work on my mental health, but it seems like I’m always doing something wrong or not doing enough in his eyes. He takes relatively small slip-ups in my progress and blows them out of proportion, causing arguments and fights.
For example, I’m a teacher, and we had several end of the year events planned for the kids, one of which was a field day at a local park. I told my husband about it the week before we went because we were discussing my last week before summer break. The night before, I reminded him that I didn’t have to go to school at my normal time because of the field day, but I would be home at my normal time. He said no worries and asked me to leave as late as possible in the morning so me could get more sleep (he works 3-11, doesn’t get to sleep until after midnight).
So, per his request, I leave at 9:30, which is about the latest I can leave and still get a few things done before the field day. Around 11:30, after we had been at the park for a while, he texted me and asked when I was coming home. I told him I’d be home normal time, reminding him about our conversation the night before. He proceeds to tell me the conversation never happened, I’m lying, and I must be cheating on him. He called me stupid for not thinking to put the event in our shared calendar so he knew the plan and selfish when I told him I didn’t think I needed to put it on the calendar because it didn’t affect our routine.
This is just one example of many situations where a small miscommunication on my part that caused no problems for our routine was turned into me being berated for going back on my promise to be more empathetic and quit making things “all about me”.
I don’t know what to do anymore. He was in therapy, but it was really expensive, and he also said he was starting to feel like he was doing better. He has suggested couple’s therapy, but he then went back on it, saying it was already too late for a couple if they have to go to therapy. I want the husband back that I had before. I don’t want to dread going home every day. I don’t want to be scared that I’ll come home to an empty house after we have a fight. I don’t want to hate myself because of the awful things this man who has replaced my husband calls me. I don’t want to show my son that it’s ok to treat his future partner like this or to be treated like this by a partner.
At this point I’m only sticking around because I don’t want my husband to take my baby away. His dad is a lawyer and could run me into the ground if he really wanted to. I want to believe that we can get through this and my husband will be able to get himself under control again. I want to believe that we can be a happy, healthy family that treats each other with respect and loves each other unconditionally.
I’m so sad, tired, lonely, broken down, and anxious. I feel like I’m barely hanging on by a thread. I’ve been on medication for bipolar II and ADHD for a while now, and I’m seeing a therapist who is specially trained in maternal mental health. I’m trying so hard to be the “cool” wife my husband has asked me to be, exhausting myself in the process, but always falling short in his eyes. I really am starting to believe that this is all my fault and I do deserve this.
I need advice, encouragement, anything to help me get through this in one piece.

Tonight at a special council meeting council voted to build the Steveston Hwy Multi Use Pathway phases 1 and 2 (2 Rd to Shell). The 4-5 vote against from general purposes committee (Richmond has committees that deal with items and then they come to council to be voted on but some of the committees like General Purposes and Finances have all 9 of them on it, so it’s a little confusing) was flipped with Laura Gillanders changing her vote after having some of her concerns addressed by staff.
So what does this mean? Steveston Hwy will be getting a 3.0m wide multi use path on the south side with a 1-1.5m boulevard with planting and trees separating it from Steveston.
The project is being funded with $5.5 million in external grants along with $5.6 million from Developer Cost Charges (fees developers pay for growth related infrastructure) and ~$350,000 from City Reserves.
This iteration of the plan has already been tendered so construction can begin shortly and staff said it will likely be complete by next fall.
No traffic lanes will be lost on Steveston and the centre lane widths will remain the same. However the curb lane which currently varies from 3.3m to over 4m will be narrowed to 3.25m (by contrast the Knight Street Bridge is reportedly 3.0-3.1m per lane). It’s been shown that narrowing lanes towards these widths helps to reduce speeds, which is a problem on Steveston Hwy as the speed limit is 50 but 70 is more typical.
Next up: phase 3 has previously been approved (2 Rd to Railway) but expect that to also come back to council and be contentious.
The Mayor, councillors Loo, Au, Wolfe and Gillanders all spoke really well on the importance of this project. Which some may find an interesting mix but to me not surprising.
Anyway I’m stoked about this so just wanted to share! Feel free to ask me any questions about it as I’m quite familiar at this point.

I planted two Jacob Cline bee balm plants last Fall. They came back this Spring and seem to be healthy with blooms forming as of a few days ago, but they are only two feet tall. Every source online says that they're supposed to be 3-4 feet tall.
Do you think they will get taller in future years as they get established, or should they have grown taller this year? I know some perennials take a few years to reach their mature height, but I don't know if this applies to bee balm. I am not sure whether to give them another year or two to get taller, or move them as I planted them in the back of a border garden (expecting them to be the tallest plant).
They get full sun from about 12:30pm until sunset, in zone 6. At the moment there only shorter annuals in front of them as a placeholder while I'm still deciding on the garden design.

Three New Terrifying True Scary Tales
​
Number One: The Pool
​
Now, this happened a very long time ago. I am not going to mention when or where though and I am submitting it anonymously. I don’t want people going back and finding out more about it and then lashing out of me.
​
I was 13 years old and my brother was 11. As I mentioned, this happened a long time ago and I think today, not a lot of parents would put a 13 year old in charge of an 11 year old. But this was not unusual at all back then. In fact, I was looking after my little brother all the time before either of us even hit 10 years old.
​
After a while, of course, always keeping my eye on him began to get very annoying. It interfered with my hanging out with friends. It was quite a drag when I would try to talk to girls. It was just a pain in the ass, really.
​
Anyway, one day during a really hot summer, our parents decided to drop us both off at the local swimming pool for the day. My dad had to work and my mom had errands and stuff to run plus work do to do for the church. It was so hot and there was no way we could afford air conditioning. We had one old fan in the house and a sprinkler in the yard that we could go play in. But the swimming pool was the much better option.
​
Of course the pool was very crowded. Lots of families would drop their kids off there during the summertime. And of course, even though I knew it already, my mom stressed to me, “Keep an eye on your little brother at all times.”
​
Some of my friends were at the pool too. I got to talking to them and they told me about this new girl who moved into town. She would be starting school that fall and supposedly she was really hot. So of course, I wanted to check her out. I knew the lifeguards would be watching my brother in the water, so he would be fine.
​
I went with the guys and the girl was really cute. My buddies all dared me to approach her, which was admittedly a brave thing for a 13 year old boy to do. Of course, I couldn’t chicken out in front of them, so I did just that.
​
She was a very sweet girl. We actually ended up talking for a little while. Her parents were at the pool though, and they called her back after too long. So I went back to the water to see how my little brother was doing.
​
The only problem was that I couldn’t see him anywhere in the water. This was a small town in a rural area, so although I said the pool was crowded, it wasn’t like a water park is crowded though. I should have easily been able to pick him out of the water. He just wasn’t there.
​
I went and searched around the area surrounding the pool and didn’t see him there either. My heart started beating faster and I began panicking. I went to the building where the showers and concession stand were. He wasn’t there either. You couldn’t leave that pool without going through that building, though. I asked the attendant if a 11 year old boy had left the pool on his own in the previous hour and he told me no.
​
I then went to the lifeguards and my buddies. I thought maybe there was a chance that I had missed him. It’s easy to occasionally miss someone in a crowd. The lifeguards ordered everyone out of the pool. Fortunately, there were no drowned children in the pool. Unfortunately, my brother was nowhere to be found outside of the pool.
​
The lifeguards had to call my mother at the church. I had never before lost track of my little brother like this before. I had no idea what to expect when she showed up. I was only thankful that the police were already at the pool or she probably would have whipped my ass right there in front of the entire pool.
​
The trouble I got into at home isn’t something that I want to go into very much. My butt very much has PTSD from the experience. But that was minor compared to the fear I felt for my little brother. Hell, I didn’t even have time to feel guilty although that I knew that I was. I was only concerned for him and wondered what would happen.
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All day and night, I expected the police to bring him home. But that didn’t happen. I expected it the next day too. But it didn’t happen.
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The town organized a search to look for him. I kept expecting to hear from them that they had found him. But that didn’t happen either.
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After about a week of my brother not being found, I began fearing for the worst. I began thinking that he was dead. And I was terrified every waking moment of my life, expecting to absolutely hear the news that his dead body was found.
​
Nearly two weeks after the disappearance, we got a phone call from the police. They had found my brother and thankfully, he was alive. But unfortunately, that’s not the whole story.
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Remember the attendant telling me that no boy had left on his own? Well that’s because the boy left with one of the lifeguards who was getting off duty. He had lured my brother out of the pool and into his car with promises of ice cream, something he and I rarely ever got. And my brother went to his house with him.
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For all of that time, he kept my little brother locked up in his basement. He didn’t do anything sexually to him, thank God. But there was a lot of mental and some physical torment when my brother wouldn’t do what he was told to you. But the scariest part for him was thinking he would never get out and be with his family again.
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Here is another weird part. The lifeguard wasn’t an adult. He did this while his parents were out of town for a few weeks. They came back early and caught him. And if you think I felt bad for my parents’ punishing me, what they did to him had to be legendary. The police thought he was either planning on killing or releasing my brother before his parents got home. But no one ever knew for sure.
​
He had to live with it without much help for a long time. Mental health assistance had a very bad stigma back then. But we’re both still alive today and he forgave me a long time ago.
​
Number Two: Taking the Garbage Out
​
A few weeks ago I went outside at around 3am to move the garbage to the curb since pickup would be in the morning. I often do this in the middle of the night. I just tend to keep weird hours and as the weather warms up for the summer I find the warm nights preferable to the sweltering days.
​
I’m not worried about bothering my neighbors since I don’t use noisy bins and all of the houses right next to me are currently empty. I actually find the quiet of the neighborhood at night quite relaxing.
​
Unfortunately since I don’t use bins animals are able to get into the bags a bit easier and while this doesn’t happen often it had happened on this night. So I was outside picking up the strewn around garbage and putting it into another bag when the silence of the night was suddenly broken by multiple police sirens.
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At first they seemed distant and while they startled me it was not at all unheard of to hear sirens at night here. But usually it would be one in the distance. As I listened, still bagging the garbage, I could tell it was multiple sirens and they were getting closer. Then just as suddenly as it started it stopped again. There was just silence. By the time they stopped they sounded maybe four blocks away.
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For a moment the night was silent again and I began hauling the bags to the curb when the neighborhood dogs began barking all at once. It was like every dog in the neighborhood had gotten the cue to start barking. Many were even howling. It continued for maybe a minute and once again it just stopped as suddenly as it had started.
​

I realized I hadn’t heard any barking or howling while the sirens were going and that’s normally how it would work. These dogs had started up separately from the sirens and just stopped all at once. It just wasn’t normal. I went back to the side of the house to grab more bags when the silence was broken a third time. 

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Just a single chime in the night. Like someone getting a phone notification. This sound wasn’t blocks away. This sound was here. RIGHT HERE. No more than feet away. As I said, the houses around me are empty.
​
I was done. The rest of the garbage would wait until morning. I didn’t see anyone close by but that just made it worse. There was someone close by that I couldn’t see. I immediately went into the house to leave the garbage for the morning.
​
I don’t know if these things were related. If the cops had been chasing someone who’s fleeing had caused the dogs to bark. Someone who received a message on their phone as they approached my house. Or if it was all just a coincidence. But I won’t be taking the garbage out at 3am anymore.
​
A Commuter’s Nightmare
William M.
06/30/2021
​
Back in the 80s, I worked at the Irwin Memorial Blood Bank in San Francisco while living and commuting from Oakland, CA
​
My job as Registrar, took me all over Northern California, during Blood Drives at hospitals, clinics, major corporations, etc., where we would sometimes witness firsthand, the dead, being placed on gurneys, running out of the Coroner's or Medical Examiner’s rear doors, and down the sidewalks, because they simply didn’t have enough room or staff inside the morgues to process them. Mortuaries were having problems too due to the massive overload where deceased loved ones were admitted but not processed or interred for months or even years at a time.
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I remember watching the News and reading newspaper accounts of E.R.s in hospitals, clinics, etc. so clogged with patients, that 1 in 10 would die waiting to just get in to see a Dr. It was a Public Health and Safety nightmare. It was a National disgrace. It was politically orchestrated mass murder. It was the B purge of the ‘80s and ‘90s.
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I remember, starting work early on one of many Blood Drives (the A.I.D.S. epidemic was just getting started) and having to catch the first B.A.R.T. (Bay Area Rapid Transit) train out of the station at about 4:00 am, where morning after morning I would witness hundreds of people sleeping on the benches, or the sidewalks, or on the streets outside, waiting for it to open.
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Hundreds of others would be seen walking around like zombies in the early morning freeze amid the concomitant yelling, screaming, moaning, begging, and pleading, all of it looking like a newsreel of the death camps at Auschwitz-Birkenau.
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Many times, I was woken at home in the middle of the night, to the sounds of people howling and cursing outside my window at some real or imagined threat, until either the police came, which usually took hours because they were spread so thin, or some tenant, or other, ran them off.
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I remember the time I woke up to the sound of a woman’s voice begging in the early morning cold for someone to help her. She kept repeating it over and over growing weaker and weaker until it was little more than a whisper.
By the time I’d gotten up, armed myself with the steel-reinforced baton I’d purchased at a Police Supply store, and ran the 5 floors down to the ground floor, I found her sitting in a taxi shivering from the 42-degree drizzle coming in off the Pacific. The cabbie told me it was alright; she was just cold and needed someplace to rest and warm up; He’d drop her off at one of the nearby shelters.
​
At the time, I was living in a local Residence Hall on Lake Merrit in Oakland, California which was little more than a converted Hotel from the San Francisco/Oakland Gilded Age of the late 1920s. It had 5 floors and a penthouse with a capacity of about 200. I never saw it get much beyond about 30 residents. It sported a full kitchen, dining area, big screen tv viewing room, swimming pool, and a recreation room with pool, foosball, and darts.
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I lived with a friend, at the time, on the 5th floor just under the penthouse. There was an elevator, but like most refurbs, it didn’t work. That meant we'd have to climb 10 flights of stairs every day to reach our room. The best part was that we had the entire floor to ourselves. I guess nobody wanted to climb that many stairs. Because we were both runners, it was a little like running the 900 feet to the top of Angel Island, running across The Golden Gate Bridge and back, or running the 3.4 miles around Lake Merrit twice a day.
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Because there was no air-conditioning, all the windows were left open during the summer months, but along with whatever cool air the San Francisco/Oakland Bay would bring through the gaping nearly wall-length vault ceilinged windows, it was always accompanied by the teeming, screaming City of Oakland street din: cabbies, buses, cars, trucks, vans, motorcycles, scooters, police sirens, ambulance, fire department, pedestrians, hustlers, druggies, break-dancers, prostitutes the homeless, et al. Day or night, winter or summer, it was like living in a jet engine test lab, somewhere on the 9th level of hell.
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Of course, we could always close the windows against the noise 5 stories below. But if it was summer, with all the humidity coming off the bay, we’d roast like 2 suckling pigs in our own sweat even if we used a fan.
​
One night after a particularly grueling day at work, I came home, climbed Mount Everest (or at least K-2) to my steaming little abattoir, tore off my sports jacket, shirt, and tie, and fell into a coma-like sleep only to awake some 4 hours later to the sound of someone slamming a door, over and over, seemingly as hard as they could. It was about 2:00 am and raining so hard the water was pouring through the open window and flooding the floor and carpet. The sound was coming somewhere down the hall from one of the other units.
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After about the 15th or 16th slam to my inner ear, I was up, as in a trance, running like a lunatic from unit to unit and window to window, covering the entire southside of the 5th floor; battening down the hatches, and getting drenched in the process. It was, how should I say: exhilaratingly infuriating. I was supposed to get up in 2 hours and commute to work in the upper peninsula.
Having unconsciously completed this Sisyphean task and realizing that there was zero chance of getting any sleep, I donned my foul weather gear, equipped my trusty baton (I used to tuck its 2 ½-foot length up my sleeve when running), and headed out the front door to Lake Merrit which was just outside the main entrance. From there, I trotted to the sidewalk circling the lake, and began to run.
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As I ran counterclockwise against a torrential rain with a gale-force wind broken only by the occasional intermittent rainbow-hued lightning flashes which blinded me to almost everything around me, I almost ran into someone up ahead who was walking in the same direction.
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He was hunched over against the wind and rain and wearing a long heavy winter coat. Unusual for that time of year, I thought. Whenever I would run in public, I always made it a courtesy to let people know when I was approaching especially from behind. I’d blurt out a perfunctory:
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“Excuse me.” Followed by a conciliatory:
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“Sorry.”
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But apparently, the person ahead either didn’t hear me or didn’t care because, when I was about 6 feet from him, he suddenly turned around, exposing a darkened contorted face, jagged teeth, and a guttural growl that would have stopped a charging 600-pound Grizzly.
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The sheer force of the malevolence emitted from this inhuman thing almost made me stop, but because I was moving so fast, the inertia along with the gale force wind and lightning strikes propelled me past him (or it), and fingering my steel-reinforced baton, I, in turn, steeled my nerve and kept running. I looked back only once to reassure myself that he (or it) wasn’t following.
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Running on the leeward side now, with the rain at my back, I ran past a group of men in a circle smoking or drinking or doing whatever noxious or illicit thing I imagined, when, feeling charged with my own adrenalin, or the anger and resentment at that woman’s searing pleas for help, or the spook I’d almost run into, or just the gross injustices thrust upon the world in that dank, dark and dangerous time, I almost stopped, baton in hand, intending to take on the whole group: I may go down, I told myself, but at least I would take one or two with me.
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Just then, the lightning struck particularly close to where I and they stood and the sheer blinding flash and concussive boom shook all of us enough to break up their conspiratorial collaboration and my righteous crusade; just enough, that is, to shove me headlong around the next bend, to the long straight full out dash to the front doors, the 5 floors, 10 landings, and 50 risers to rain-sodden home.
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To get to work every day, I'd have to commute to the upper peninsula by using 3 buses, 1 train, and 1 cab and after a 10 or 12 or sometimes 14-hour day, I would have to take the same to get back. This meant that if I didn’t go out, make dinner, eat, or watch tv, I just might get about 4 hours sleep. Commuting took between 2 to 3 hours, one way.
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Once on the way home, almost every stop was crowded with commuters. I was told that it was because there were so many buses down for repair. The ones still running were so filled beyond capacity, that the shocks and springs were sitting on the chassis, and stop after stop proved nearly impossible to take on any more passengers. Still, and despite the few getting out at every stop, the driver would take on even more and just pack them in.
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I remember him yelling for people to get back behind the yellow line over and over. By then, he was long past any semblance of reason; his patience frayed to a single maniacal thought, his voice raspier and raspier, his manner, more and more brusk.
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I can still see when he finally lost it; jumping up, out of his seat, with a nickel-plated 38 Caliber Revolver pointing at one of the passengers; an elderly woman, screaming from the top of his lungs:
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“Get back behind the yellow line!”
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I can still hear the woman begging the driver:
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“Please...” while the passengers behind were practically trampling each other to get out of the line of fire.
I remember the sad, exhausted urgency in her voice; she really was trying to move back, but how could she, an old woman, do that with all those people blocking her way? Everyone knew this was an impossible task; everyone except the maddened driver. He just kept glaring, and bellowing with his gun out pointed right at her and the other passengers.
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"Back up and make room" he yelled.
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‘Or else what?’ I thought. ‘You're gonna kill an old woman?'
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Getting up out of my seat, pushing my way through the throng who were pushing against me to get away, I managed to get within about 6 feet from the front when, roaring through the din and my fear and anger, I ordered the bus driver to:
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“Put the gun down!” And again, with even more rage and authority:
“Put the gun down, now!”
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The bus driver shocked that it might be a cop, or worse, shakily, put his gun back in his concealed carry holster and hypnotically sat back down. He resumed driving without saying another word. I got out at the next stop, along with the elderly woman. She was so shaken, that she busted out crying. I held her still fuming despite the close call because I would now have to wait for another bus and after that, 2 more; the train and a cab to get home. I wasn’t going to make it until well after 8:00 pm. As soon as I got home, I reported the bus number and the driver to Muni.
​
Many of the commuters I'd see day to day, or share a seat with were victims of the purge just trying to get out of the rain or the cold, or the wind, or the sun, even for just a little while. For them, it was easing the agony of living on the street, even just a little. For many of us regular commuters, during those dark times, it proved to be the same.
​
On one of the final buses that would take me to the train and across the bay, I remember standing, with about 50 others, on Market Street waiting. Like ours, stop after stop was so packed with people, some were standing in the street because there was simply not enough room on the sidewalk. The ones in the street would stay where they were for fear of losing their place and missing their connection and having to wait another hour, or more, to catch another.
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Because the rapidly descending elevation of the southbound streets ending at Market Street from the upper peninsula were so steep and the transverse angle of the turn so sharp, some of the buses would skirt the edge of the curb, sometimes rolling up over it onto the sidewalk putting them dangerously close to the commuters waiting on the other side.
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If there were any people in the street, especially the old or the infirm, they would either have to get out of the way and lose their place in line or hope the bus driver stopped before completing the turn. Most of the drivers would. Once there was one who didn’t.
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I remember the television and newspaper account about an elderly woman waiting at one of the stops during the pm rush hour. When the bus made the oblique turn way too fast at 25 miles per hour she was either too close to the edge or standing in the street when she was hit by the side view mirror across the face and the left side of her head.
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She went down under the wheels and her body got hung up under the chassis. The bus driver too full of passengers to stop, or late for his break, or just too coked up to notice, kept on heading for the Embarcadero before he realized something was wrong. By then, the woman had been dragged over a quarter of a mile. No one knew for sure whether the concussion from the mirror or the relentless dragging was the cause of death. I guess it didn’t matter to her anymore, one way or the other. It mattered to a lot of those who witnessed the whole thing though; screaming and yelling, block after block, trying to get the bus driver to stop.
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To get across the Bay to San Francisco from Oakland or back, one alternative to the nightmare bus commute was the B.A.R.T (Bay Area Rapid Transit). It was quiet, clean, air-conditioned, and fast. Traveling under the Bay, it could span the 13 miles in minutes. Once I’d reach the train station, by bus, from the Oakland side, I’d descend one of the many street-level entries to the below-ground turnstiles which led to the train platform. Of course, there were always hundreds of derelicts, homeless, hustlers, etc., hanging out by the turnstiles waiting for their chance to slip through and get on any one of the many trains that serviced the Bay Area, but sometimes, especially after a scuffle with B.A.R.T. Security or the San Francisco/Oakland Police, they’d scatter to the winds (or the shadows as it were) until everything calmed down and then they'd be back at it again, day and night.
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Almost every week I'd hear about someone falling, or being pushed, or jumping down onto the third rail, which would either short-circuit the line and knock out the power or if it was particularly grisly, halt service entirely. Because service resumption could take hours, waiting passengers would have to go back up and out onto the street and catch another train, take a cab or a bus or just walk or, as was often the case for me, run.
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Once, I remember running to the next stop when I was ascending to the upper peninsula because the previous connection didn’t show up which meant it would have added another 45 minutes to my commute. The choice was obvious and inevitable: I could either
“wait to be late” or go for it. I chose the latter.
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You just can't imagine what it’s like to run at a 20-degree angle uphill for about 2 miles while wearing dress slacks, dress shoes, a white shirt and tie, and a sports jacket, in San Francisco, during the summer, with the humidity until you’ve tried it. It’s, how should I say: exhilaratingly infuriating.
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Running, I came upon a stand-alone, transmission shop, right in the middle of a residential area. The owners must have paid a pretty penny to get away with that one. There were police cars, the fire department, a metro ambulance, the San Francisco Chronicle, and a marked County Coroner’s Office vehicle scattered around the shop.
Some people along with some of the employees: their first names embroidered on their shirts, were standing on the sidewalk just outside the property watching. They’d been there for about an hour when I stopped to ask one of them (Bob) what happened.
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Wearily he said:
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“The girl who worked in the office answering the phone and typing up orders was shot to death by her boyfriend. The boyfriend got away but she was still down there being processed. God, she was only 24 years old. They’ll catch him, though. He hasn’t got a chance.”
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'Nope,' I thought.
'In this town, I don’t expect he would.'
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I was late again when I got home. Vaulting the 5 floors to reach our loft, I held my friend close, the entire night. She was ok with that. So was I.=

I am being medically retired from the military. Initially when I found this out my wife and I told my parents we plan on moving back to the same city as them so they can enjoy being part of their grandchildren’s lives. They were so excited about this, decked out rooms for our kids, and we were so excited to be close to family again. They have had long lucrative careers and are planning on retiring when I move back to spend as much time as they can as a family.
They live in a very high COL area and is in the top 5 wealthiest counties in the US. After visiting recently i realized I really don’t like it. Its snooty, people are self centered, the infrastructure is falling apart because its so over crowded, and few people give back to the community. With my experience i can likely get a job in the 100-130k range here.
Where I currently live I’m not a huge fan partially because I associate it with a lot of negative military experiences and I wanted to escape them. However the COL here is extremely low, its rapidly developing and self sustaining (covid barely affected this place). I also have been offered multiple jobs making 130-170k. This plus my pension/benefits/tax breaks would be a stupid amount of money in that area. I’ve made 25-35k base pay plus entitlements a year for the past 6 years while active duty and lived very comfortably. The idea of nearly 8x that is insane. I envision a great school district, paid off house, cars and selfishly a membership to the best golf club in town.
….but my children would miss out on their grandparents, and my parents would miss out on them. I want my parents at my kids baseball games, concerts and milestones. Not to mention i want to be with my parents as well as they are up there in age. On the flip side the money would be life changing.
Also, wife’s parents are a factor in this. She loves them, however they emotionally abuse her and steal from us. Both of them are addicts. She wants to get away from them as well and she says when she is with my parents its like she gets to have all the family moments she missed out on as a kid.
Its a ton of money, but i know i cant put a price on love, family and memories. Just feel absolutely torn.
What’s your guy’s opinion? What would you guy’s do? Anyone had similar situations?

Research on Counselor and Client Safety
For this assignment:

1. Locate a minimum of two current scholarly articles (published within the last 10 years from the professional literature) that address counselor safety and two articles that address client safety in counseling situations, for a total of four articles. Tip: You may need to look at multiple disciplines, such as counseling, social work, emergency and crisis journals, and so on.
2. In your own words, evaluate the key points of the articles, such as the author's recommendations, and describe the issues related to counselor and client safety.
3. Evaluate the key elements of the risks to counselor and client safety associated with the types of crises you may work with in your community. Key elements of risk are discussed throughout crisis assessment in your textbook, such as assessing for lethality, determining if mental instability is present, or if substance use is involved.
4. Discuss the procedures for identifying trauma and abuse and for reporting abuse when safety issues arise for the counselor or the client.

Note: A template for your APA-formatted paper is included in the assignment Resources. Use the template to present the assignment criteria in an organized way. The headings guide you to the criteria, and the details that are included describe what is necessary to complete the assignment to a distinguished degree.
Assignment Requirements

• Content: Prepare a comprehensive paper that includes all sections described above.
• Components: The paper must include a title page, abstract, and reference list.
• Written communication: Develop accurate written communication and thoughts that convey the overall goals of the project and do not detract from the overall message.
• APA formatting: Resources and citations are formatted according to current APA guidelines for style and format.
• Number of pages: Use the Unit 7 Assignment Template linked in the Resources. The body of the paper should fall within 4–6 pages, excluding the title page, abstract, and reference list.
• Number of resources: Minimum of 4 current resources, published within the last 10 years.
• Font and font size: Times New Roman, 12-point.

When a victim falls victim to a Bitcoin hack, the specific consequences and actions taken will depend on the circumstances and the nature of the hack. Here are some possible outcomes and steps that might be taken:

1. Loss of Funds: The most immediate impact of a Bitcoin hack is the loss of funds. If an attacker gains unauthorized access to someone's Bitcoin wallet or exchange account, they can steal the victim's Bitcoins. Once the Bitcoins are transferred out of the victim's control, they become difficult to recover.
2. Reporting the Hack: The victim should report the hack to the appropriate authorities, such as local law enforcement and the cybercrime division. They may also need to report the incident to the platform or service provider where the hack occurred, such as a Bitcoin exchange or wallet service.
3. Investigation: Law enforcement agencies or cybercrime units may initiate an investigation into the hack to identify the perpetrators and gather evidence. However, it's worth noting that the decentralized nature of Bitcoin makes it challenging to trace stolen funds, especially if the hackers take steps to cover their tracks.
4. Legal Recourse: The victim may explore legal options to recover their funds or seek compensation for the losses incurred. They might engage lawyers specializing in cybercrime or cryptocurrency-related cases to explore potential avenues for recovery or restitution.
5. Security Measures: Following a hack, the victim should take immediate steps to enhance their security. This may involve changing passwords, enabling two-factor authentication, and reviewing their overall cybersecurity practices. They should also inform their financial institution or any other relevant parties to prevent further unauthorized access.
6. Publicity and Community Support: Depending on the scale and impact of the hack, the incident might attract media attention. This could lead to public awareness of the situation, potentially triggering support and assistance from the cryptocurrency community or even crowdfunding efforts to help the victim recover their losses.

It's important to note that the decentralized and pseudonymous nature of Bitcoin transactions means that recovering stolen funds can be extremely challenging. While there have been instances where stolen Bitcoins have been retrieved or hackers have been apprehended, it is often an arduous process with no guarantees of success. Therefore, it is crucial for Bitcoin users to adopt strong security practices and exercise caution to mitigate the risks of falling victim to such hacks.

Hello, I was hoping I could get a second look at my school list before submitting in case there are any red flags I'm missing or schools I should add. I am trying to avoid schools in states that have passed laws restricting women's health.
Massachusetts resident
Stats: GPA: 3.70 (really 6.997) Science GPA: 3.724 MCAT: 513 (130, 129, 125, 129)
Extracurriculars:
Clinical Hours: Army medic: 4456 hours, Primary Care Nurse: 2860, Covid 19 Vaccinator: 300, Primary care shadowing 100 hours
Research: 1160 hours as a Clinical Research Coordinato Research RN
Volunteering: around 200 hours with a crisis helpline, 40 hours coaching, and 40 hours medical support for a marathon
Misc: BJJ club captain, honors project with association of the blind, hobby writing and video game development
Current list: Albany, Albert Einstein, Boston, Drexel, Duke, Emory, Quinnipiac, Dartmouth, George Washington, Jacobs Buffalo, Temple, New York Medical College, NYU Long Island, Oregon, Renaissance Stony Brook, UVM, Rutgers, Thomas Jefferson, Utah, SUNY Upstate, Brown, Tufts, Colorado, Connecticut, Kansas, UMass, Chapel Hill, Pitt, Rochester, University of Washington, Wake Forrest, Washington State
If anyone has any suggestions please let me know.

In my opinion, this would be the top 5 (not in order): Sol (5), Teslee (3), Jessup (12), Mizzen (4) and Circ (3).
Btw every death if you don't remember some:

1. Facet and Velvereen (1) (Shot by peacekeepers while trying to escape the arena)
2. Sabyn (2) (Leaped over a wall to die due to fall impact while trying to escape the arena)
3. Marcus (2) (Lamina drived her axe 3 times to his neck)
4. Teslee (3) (Treech pierced her head with an axe)
5. Circ (3) (Bitten and poisoned to death by several snakes)
6. Coral (4) (Bitten to death whilst trying to escape the snakes)
7. Mizzen (4) (Pushed by Teslee's dron which cause him to break his neck)
8. Sol (5) (Coral speared her trident through her throat)
9. Hy (5) (Died from an asthma attack)
10. Otto and Ginnee (6) (DIed from the explosion)
11. Lamina (7) (Coral plunged her trident into her stomach, she then fell and died due to the fall)
12. Treech (7) (Lucy Gray got a snake into his shirt which killed him)
13. Wovey (8) (Drank Lucy Gray's poisoned (rat) bottles)
14. Bobbin (8)(Snow beat him several times with a board in the head which deformed and killedhim)
15. Panlo and Sheaf (9) (Died due to explosion injuries)
16. Brandy (10) (Shot several times by the peacekeepers after cutting Arachne Crane's throat)
17. Tanner (10) (stabbed in the back by Coral and then got a knife to his neck by Mizzen)
18. Dill (11) (Died due to tuberculosis)
19. Reaper (11) (Poisoned by Lucy Gray with rat venom)
20. Jessup (12) (Broke several bones after trying to escape from the water bottles due to his rabies)